Chapter 49: The Prelude
"Did you hear who Milton's going to the prom with?" Miranda asked.
Tifa shook her head.
"Amy," Miranda replied.
"Amy?!" Tifa exclaimed.
"Apparently, she asked him," Miranda said. "God knows why, as they're not even close at all."
"Weird," Tifa said.
"Which reminds me," Miranda continued. "Have you gotten your dress yet?"
Tifa shook her head.
"Where am I supposed to get a dress when I'm technically in jail?"
"Reform school," Miranda corrected. "And, for the record, the school bookstore sells dresses."
With that, she sat next to Tifa, and pulled up the website with her laptop. Sure enough, there were plenty of dresses.
"How about this one?" Miranda suggested, showing a violet dress that shimmered.
"That one shows a lot of cleavage," Tifa pointed out.
"That's the point," Miranda insisted. "Show your boobs off for your boy! Because I damn well wish I had boobs like yours."
"This again," Tifa laughed as she shook her head. "How many girls want my tits?"
"I have no idea," Miranda replied. "Oh, is it hot in here!"
She then quickly pulled off her tee shirt to reveal a tank top she was wearing underneath.
And the tank top read: "'I'm not jealous of Tifa Lockhart's boobs,' said no girl ever!"
"Where did you get that?!" Tifa laughed.
"I customized it!" Miranda replied with a smile. "It's the truth!"
Tifa placed her head in her hands and continued to laugh.
Miranda was definitely a trip.
Someone who did not deserve the fate she was bound to.
Which reminded her…
"Listen," Tifa began. "I want to tell you something. About someone."
"Okay," Miranda agreed. "Who?"
"Our friend, Zack, actually," Tifa replied. "Zack Fair. Ever heard of him?"
"I heard the name," Miranda admitted.
"Three years from now," Tifa began, "he'll be mortally wounded in a Shinra attack. Cissnei, my future cousin-in-law, will find him, and take him to a fissure. This is a figure in the crust, and it exposes the Lifestream. Anyone dipped in will have all their illnesses and injuries healed. So Zack was healed, and he later played a big part in fighting a pandemic."
"Wow," said Miranda.
"Flash forward a few months later," Tifa continued. "I'll be mortally wounded myself. Days before I marry Cloud, to be exact. I'll get dipped myself, and I'll be good as new."
"I bet it gave you extra energy for your wedding night!" Miranda laughed.
"Three more of our friends will get dipped this way," Tifa continued, ignoring her friend's snarky comment. "One is living dead, and after he's dipped, he'll be fully living again."
"You're going somewhere with this, aren't you?" Miranda asked skeptically.
"We want you to get dipped, too," Tifa said. "That will fix your heart condition."
There was a long silence.
Tifa sat in anticipation. She wondered what her answer would be, and wondered how she would react knowing that there would be a ticket to her salvation.
"I'll have to think about this," Miranda finally said.
Tifa was both hopeful and disappointed at the same time.
"Don't you want to live?" she asked.
"Of course I do," Miranda insisted. "But you're proposing a change in history. One which will, no doubt, result in a paradox."
Tifa lowered her head in sadness. Miranda did have a point.
"You really haven't had sex in seven years?" Miranda then asked, changing the subject.
Tifa shook her head.
"That's one durable marriage," Miranda complimented.
Tifa then became suspicious that Miranda was planning something as well.
LATER…
Riggs walked out of class to see Miranda sitting on a bench.
"Hey you!" she greeted.
"Hey there," Riggs greeted back. "You don't have class here."
"I'm on a mission," she began.
"What kind of a mission?" he inquired.
"I'm trying to get Cloud and Tifa to have sex," Miranda announced.
"You're what?" Riggs asked in surprise.
"Let me rephrase that," Miranda continued. "I'm trying to get their relationship back to the way it had been before Sephiroth turned them into children."
"I see," he deduced. "They started dating again, so the next step is the bedroom."
"I already made Cloud a cologne," Miranda continued. "The same kind that my mom used to sell as a aphrodisiac. Hopefully that will work, but Tifa is Tifa. Not to mention, Cloud can be a little aloof at times."
"I looked up their personal files when I hacked their phones," Riggs said. "Both Tifa and Cloud are confirmed to have Asperger's."
"I'm an aspie myself," Miranda said. "I know the way around everything. That's another reason I should probably be there. I need to correct any mistakes either of them might make. Catch them if they fall, if you will."
"Why don't you go?" Riggs asked.
"I can't," she dismissed. "It's a couples-only event. Do you think anyone would go with me after what I did to get in here?"
Riggs was silent. He knew all too well, because nobody would go with him because he was friends with her.
"Unless," she began.
"Unless?" he asked, although what she would say next was obvious to him.
"How would you like to pretend to be a couple so we can go?"
"Of course," he replied, trying his best not to sound too eager.
He had actually intended to ask her anyway, but had been lacking the courage to do so.
"But…how could we make sure they….you know….?"
"Tifa had a way of telling Cloud she wanted sex," Miranda explained. "She put his hand in her butt. That was her signal. If we see her do that, we'll know it's a mission accomplished."
With that, she presented him with something she had been concealing.
It was a red rose.
"Riggs Benson?" she began. "I need to formally ask you. Will you go to the prom with me?"
"Yes, I will," he replied.
"Great!" she said as she high-fived him.