I guess I should've taken New Year's as an omen or something. I didn't but I should have. Though really I guess I can't be blamed entirely for not seeing the building crapstorm that 1968 would be. We all should have seen it.
The thing is, when you get used to things going wrong, you just see them as just another thing going wrong and not as part of anything bigger.
So New Year's Eve me and Joanie gussied ourselves all up and headed out to the country club in Bloomfield Hills. Joanie spent so much time getting ready that I finally had to holler at her to hurry up. I didn't usually do that but we were running a bit behind and I wasn't trusting the roads a great deal.
I'd been sitting in my tux waiting for her to emerge from the bedroom for a good half hour. When she did and made her way down the stairs, I didn't know what to think and words were lost completely to me. I think if I was a cartoon character, I would have been doing the thing where their eyes pop out of their heads. I might even have had to collect them off the floor.
There stood my Joanie in some red satin get up. It was strapless which was nice to begin with since, I ain't kept it any secret that Joanie was very well endowed, if you get my drift. The rest of the dress hugged her curves. Every single one of them. I knew those curves pretty well and the thought was beginning to dawn on me that every man at the country club was going to know her curves almost as well as I did.
That thought made me a little uncertain of going out in public with her but then again, those were my curves to touch. She was mine to go home with at the end of the night and if she wanted to make every man at the party jealous of me then who was I to argue with her?
Looking at her face, I was beginning to figure out what took her so long to get ready. And why she'd been at the beauty parlor all day and come home with a scarf wrapped around her head. Her hair was done up like…well, I don't know really. It had been straightened and that's quite an accomplishment for her nest of curls. It was still curled but looser curls. Not the Jewish ones she came by naturally. The curls were like ringlets and those were piled on her head while the rest of her hair was straight and flowed over her shoulders.
She kept her hair longer because her curls didn't work for a lot of the short styles of the day and longer hair could be put in some twist or bun or something for court. I guess with her curls I didn't notice how long it was. When it was all straight, it flowed to the middle of her shoulder blades.
Her face was done up like she was trying for the cover of some fashion magazine. Eyeliner and I think she was even wearing false eyelashes. Her lipstick was the same blazing red as her dress. And she wasn't wearing her glasses. I knew there were contact lenses then but I didn't know until that night that Joanie had a pair of them. They weren't comfortable things then being hard and not breathing like the ones they have nowadays but it was a sight to see her without the spectacles.
That night was the first night she had worn them. They were a surprise for me. She'd been putting them in at work during the days to get used to them. But that night was the great unveiling.
Around her neck was the slight glint of the gold chain that held her Star of David. On her ears were the diamond earrings I had just given her for Chanukkah. Her nails were painted the same bright scarlet as her lips and I watched them fidget with the thin sash tied in a bow that accented her tiny waist and its contrast to the alluring curve of her hips and breasts.
"Joanie," I managed around my suddenly dry throat. "I-uh-you look…amazing."
She smiled as if relieved and I wrinkled my brow.
"Have I been neglecting you again?" I asked. "Was I acting like I needed reminding how sexy you are?"
"What? This old thing," she said with a wink and a smile that looked like a cat with canary feathers on her lips.
"Careful with that Mae West attitude, Joanie or we might not make it to the party at all," I said. I was trying to be funny but looking at her made that more than an idle threat.
"Easy Tiger," she laughed. "You're the one who invited guests this time. You can't leave them hanging like that."
She was right of course. I had invited Kid and Lou. We could always have invited guests who weren't members to the party but usually our friends had other plans. This was kind of special though. I had invited them and Theresa too. She declined wanting to go to a party some friends were having. That choice brought about other issues but I'll get to that later.
I knew we had to be there. Kid wasn't settled in yet. Not by a long shot. And Lou would feel a little out of place too if I wasn't there to help them out.
"Help a lady with her coat?"
I broke out of my thoughts enough to see Joanie standing there holding her coat in her hands. It was new. I saw it when she brought it home. It went all the way to her ankles and was trimmed in some fake fur. I guess I hadn't thought about if she had any specific reason in mind for buying a coat like that. A lot of dresses then went all the way to the floor. But I'm pretty sure she bought it just for that night.
I helped her into her coat and it struck me then that for all the times I had helped her into a coat, this was the one and only time she had ever asked me. It was strange but I didn't have much time to ponder it. Like I said, we were running behind and I had no idea what the roads would be like.
The drive to Bloomfield Hills near to killed me. Joanie slid across the seat right up tight to me and rested her head against my shoulder. I could feel her breath on my neck and the few times she spoke, her voice was barely above a whisper and her lips brushed lightly against my skin.
More than once I thought about pulling over to the side of the road, hauling her into the back seat and taking her up on what she seemed to be offering.
Joanie had some ideas of her own though. Her hands began to lightly trail up and down the inside of my thighs. If she was trying to get a rise out of me, at least one part of my body was obliging rather nicely.
I heard the chuckle from deep in her throat as her fingers drifted over the response she'd caused in my body.
"Oh dear," she said with feigned innocence. "It simply won't do to have you walk into the party in this state."
Then her nimble little fingers set to work undoing my pants. I had to pull the car over then. Maybe some men can keep their focus on the road with a woman's hands in their pants. I can't.
I brought the car safely to a stop and by then, my predicament was out in the artificially heated air of the car. Joanie pushed me back against the door. She looked at me like a wolf sizing up prey.
All I could do was stare at her. I mean, there I was half laying on the seat and hanging out of my pants while this incredibly sexy woman came toward me like a tigress.
That was when Joanie descended on me. All I could do was hold on tight to the seat and watch as her mouth worked over me.
Once she had me in a more…presentable state, she primly tucked me back into my pants, did up the button and zipper and patted the front of my trousers.
The she looked up at my dumbfounded face and just smiled. It was the most self-satisfied smile I have ever seen.
"We should probably get moving, James," she said fully bemused. "You were the one who was worried about being late."
I put the car in gear and got us back on the road. We went along in silence for a while and then she slid over to me again.
"Just so you know," she growled softly in my ear. "I'm not through with you tonight…not by a long shot."
"You're killing me, Joanie," I groaned. "You know that, don't you?"
She just giggled. Yeah, she knew it alright.
The worst was when we got to the country club, Joanie had me stop the car before we got to the valet. She kicked on the dome light and touched up her lipstick. All I could think of was how it got mussed and where there was probably some smeared lipstick on my body right then. My body wanted to respond and more than anything wanted to do something about the response. But we were just too close to the party.
You might think I wouldn't remember the party what with Joanie playing the part of sex kitten. But plenty happened that night to provide distraction from my sexy wife.
I had to play host to my guests and I wasn't used to that. Especially at the country club where I always felt like an interloper myself. Inviting them might not have been the best thing to do in retrospect. But I think a part of me was still denying how bad off Kid was.
He was home after all that time and that made me want to celebrate and have him close to us as much as possible. But I wasn't part of the hard work that was going into him adjusting to civilian life…or civilization itself for that matter.
But before I got to dealing with Kid and Lou there was other unpleasantness to deal with. I barely got Joanie's coat off of her before coming face to face with her parents.
Now my problem wasn't with Gladys. I never knew for sure if she had anything to do with what Mr. Cohen and Uncle Eli did at that very same country club a little over a month before. I chose to believe she didn't. I might be deluding myself but somehow I don't think so. I honestly think she didn't have the slightest clue what those men had done. I know Judy didn't know about it at that point in the evening. I also knew she'd be furious. There was no way she had played any part of it. Judy knew her sister better than either of those men did.
Gladys reached me first and I hugged her warmly. I always liked her and I think she was on my side even more than Mr. Cohen had been. He might have been the one that put me at ease in the beginning and he might have been the one who was in my place as the guy from the wrong side of the tracks going after the classy girl. But I think it was Gladys who always saw something in me. She was the classy girl who went for the poor working stiff, Jacob Cohen. I think she knew things she never let on. And I don't think Mr. Cohen was as immediately sold on me as he would have me believe. I think he got a lot of reminding of things from his wife.
"It's good to see you, Gladys," I said as I let her go. She patted my face.
"I miss you, James," she said sadly. "We don't see enough of you anymore."
"I know," I answered. "It's been tough to find time…"
It was a weak reply. I know that.
"So much tsuris," she said sadly. "But maybe now that is behind us and we can celebrate the happy things?"
"I hope so," I said giving her another hug.
That was about when Mr. Cohen walked over to me. I couldn't greet him so warmly. I just couldn't. It might be juvenile and petty but I just couldn't forgive him. Not yet anyway. Instead I just stuck my hand stiffly out.
"Jacob," I said pointedly.
"James," he replied shaking my hand.
My slight had an effect on him. I could tell. I'd shaken that man's hand numerous times and he had a good firm handshake. It was limper than a wet dish rag that day. I could see that maybe he regretted how he'd acted. I wanted to soften to him but at the same time, I just couldn't.
Judy had seen the exchange and looked at me like she knew something was up. I went over and hugged her tight.
"I'll explain later," I whispered. "This isn't the time or place."
"Is Joanie okay?" Judy whispered back and hugging me tighter. "I mean…I knew she was talking about a dress like that but I never thought she'd actually wear it."
"She seems better than she has in months," I told her.
She pulled away from me keeping her hands on my arms and looked closely at me.
"Looks like somebody had a nice drive out here," she observed with a quirk of her eyebrows.
Then she giggled and headed to greet her sister. I will never know how she even had an inkling that anything happened on the drive and I had to remind myself that she wasn't a baby anymore. It still sort of stuck in my craw that she seemed to know that much about sex. And that knowledge made a few more things that night stick in my craw too.
By the time Judy broke the hug with her big sister, there was a young guy standing expectantly next to her. I looked him up and down. If he was who I thought he was then Bubbe was doing the twist in her grave.
As I was looking over the guy I was pretty sure was Judy's date, I felt Joanie slip up real close to me, and I could tell right off it had nothing to do with insecurity. It was sexual, plain and simple. Oh, she wasn't being overt or anything like that, but Joanie was definitely making sure every man in the place knew who she came with and was going home with. It was a great big "yeah, eat your heart out, boys." to anyone who might notice her dress hugging her body and thinking how nice that body looked and how nice it might feel.
"Erik," Judy said as she simultaneously took notice of his presence and her big sister's actions. "I want you to meet my big sister Joanie and her husband James."
Erik smiled brightly at us.
"I've heard such wonderful things about you both," he said as he lightly shook Joanie's hand and then very firmly shook mine.
"It's nice to meet you," I replied. I couldn't say I'd heard nice things about him since I hadn't heard a damned thing about him at all.
I cut a glance at Judy who looked nervous to see my response. She'd come to trust my assessment of men and was waiting for the verdict. You can point out that I had known him for all of a minute and a half but there's a lot you can tell about a man's handshake. His was firm but uncertain. He was trying to make a good impression. Maybe he was even trying too hard.
Now that could be because she meant that much to him and he was nervous or it could mean he was trying to deceive me. I think of that as the Eddie Haskell treatment. You've seen Leave it to Beaver…at least on the channels that run old shows. Remember Wally's friend Eddie? How he'd always be extra nice and polite to June. It was downright creepy. And he thought he was snowing the Cleavers over so they wouldn't see what a slimy schmuck he was. Of course the Cleavers saw through Eddie. I could usually see through any Eddies that Judy got herself tangled up with too.
At that moment though, the jury was still out as far as Erik was concerned. I'd have to collect some more information. I gave Judy a non-committal shrug and she looked exasperated with me. Women. Sometimes there's just no pleasing them.
The group of us started heading to the table but I broke away to walk to the door.
"Just going to peek outside and look for a sign of Kid and Lou," I explained quietly to Joanie when she looked at me.
Her hands held my elbow a moment longer and she rose on her toes and pressed a lingering kiss to my jaw.
She didn't know it but it took every ounce of strength I had to walk away from her. There Joanie was in a sea of women who were wearing the cutting edge fashions of 1967. I questioned the term 'fashion' that evening. In my mind they were about as shape flattering as old flour sacks and there was my Joanie in the middle wearing that curve hugging red satin number. Every man was admiring her and I didn't want to leave her for a second.
But leave her I did. I stepped outside just as Lou drove up. Kid wasn't used to driving anymore and his leg pained him something fierce. He got back to driving after a while but eventually gave it up as the injury gave him more hassles. And there I go getting ahead of myself again. I stood in the doorway and watched as Lou handed her keys to the valet and ran around to try to help Kid out of the car.
He pushed her hands off of him and stood painfully. Maybe any other bystander wouldn't've seen the hurt on Lou's face as he pushed away her efforts to help him. But I wasn't just any bystander. Lou and I had gotten pretty tight while Kid was away. I knew her moods like few others. She couldn't hide something like that hurt from me anymore than I could hide anything from her.
We got to be a pretty good team, Lou and me. I don't mean like me and Joanie but…well, she turned to me for help with the boys and with Theresa and I leaned on her when I didn't know how to deal with Joanie. What it amounted to was me and Lou becoming closer than brother and sister. that I stepped into Kid's shoes in every way but one. I never once saw her in any sort of romantic light and I can honestly say she never saw me that way either…I think she wanted to once or twice.
Don't take that like it might sound. The time or two that she looked at me like that…she was sad and she was lonely and she needed something to cling to. I didn't mind her clinging to me but at least once I had to remind her of the boundaries we needed to keep. It wasn't that she loved me or even was attracted to me. I really don't think she was. But sometimes we see things that aren't there because we need to see something. I'm not making any sense and it don't matter anyway.
Back to that New Year's Eve party. I watched the two of them move toward the door. He offered his arm to Lou excatly like Emma taught all of us to do so many years ago. She obliged, and rested her small hand in the crook of his elbow, but the moment she tried to place her freehand on his arm too, he shook her free.
Lou spotted me about that moment and looked away like she was embarrassed. There was so much pain in her big brown eyes right about then. I didn't really know what to do.
Just a month earlier if I'd seen that look in her eyes, I could have gone to her and given her some comfort…a word, a hug…something. But the man limping laboriously beside her meant it wasn't my place to rush to her like that anymore. I know she was still my sister and I would always be a brother to her but there were things it wasn't my place to do anymore.
Lou tamped down the embarrassment and hurt and placed her hand lightly in the crook of his elbow again. I opened the door to the club for them and then followed them in. They checked their coats and I led them to our table. I watched as Kid managed to pull out Lou's chair for her.
I'd made sure that he had a chair where he could face the party. It was hard for me to give up what was usually my spot but he needed to see what was coming at him more than I did at that moment. I don't even know if it helped all that much. He sat there stiffly with his eyes darting everywhere at once.
Lou tried to take his hand but he pulled away from her. There were tears standing in her eyes. I knew better than to think she would let them fall. Hell, I knew if I pulled her aside right then that she wouldn't even admit to anything being wrong.
Thankfully, Joanie saw it too. She squeezed my hand under the table.
"I think I need to go powder my nose," Joanie said lightly.
"I'll join you," Lou answered jumping up so fast I thought she might topple her chair.
I don't know what those two chatted about in the bathroom but when they got back to the table, Lou was a little lighter and Joanie looked more weighed down.
I stood and held Joanie's chair for her. When I leaned down to kiss her cheek before taking my seat again, she held my face close to her head for a moment.
"Keep an eye on him," she whispered.
"I have been," I whispered back.
And I wasn't lying. I watched Kid's every move from the moment he set foot in the building. He seemed agitated by the activity and sound. It was worse when Lou left for the powder room with Joanie. He seemed to nearly come unglued. Instead of darting wildly, his eyes were fixed on the direction the ladies would be coming from and he didn't look anywhere else or even move a muscle until he saw her again.
He also chugged his wine like it was lemonade or something. That worried me some too. Kid wasn't a teetotaler but he wasn't a heavy drinker either. Of course this was a party and he was under stress and he wasn't driving so I kind of let it slide for that night.
Conversation was kept mostly light and no one asked too much of Kid which was probably a good thing. Gratefully no one brought up the war either. I have no idea how he would have reacted to that topic on that night. It wasn't something he talked about. When he did talk with me it had reached a point where he'd speak in generalities, no details were ever given.
After we'd all finished eating, the band picked up the pace a little and people got out on the dance floor and really started cutting a rug. Before I could even think about asking Joanie for a dance, Judy was holding out her hand to me and I saw Erik bowing to my girl.
I might have gotten angry about that guy asking her like that but I could tell he was under orders to do it. It never went well for any man to go against the wishes of a Cohen woman. I knew that from experience. Judy was behind this and I was best to go along. Judy might not have been my Cohen woman but she was every bit as fierce as the one I married—maybe even more so.
I got up and let Judy lead me onto the dance floor. I put my hand on Judy's waist and spared a look back to the table to see Kid pushing himself out of his seat to offer a hand to his bride. I knew it would be a struggle for him to limp his way around the dance floor but I also knew he'd been dreaming of such a thing for years and finally could again. He'd manage it somehow.
"He's not okay, is he?" Judy asked and I jerked my head to her. I think I had forgotten I was dancing with a young lady. Amazing what worry can do.
"He can't be expected to be," I answered.
"I suppose not," she looked thoughtful for a moment and then almost cautious before she broached the next subject. "So what's up with you and Dad?"
I just frowned at her. I didn't want to say anything about it. But I had to tell someone. At that point, I hadn't said a word to anyone. It was hard keeping something like that inside me.
"This has to stay between us," I told her. She looked a little scared of my expression and then nodded slowly.
I proceeded to tell her the story and I watched her face turn five different shades of red. She was livid. I could tell. She wanted to go and tear her father down a peg.
"Between us," I reminded her. "I can't risk Joanie ever knowing this. I hate keeping secrets…and maybe someday it will be water so far under the bridge that it won't matter. But she's so fragile right now. I can't let her know that her own family has such doubts…that they've lost faith in her like that. I just can't. You know that."
"It would kill her," Judy agreed. "I can't believe they did that."
"I couldn't believe it myself…"
"I'm sorry they treated you like that, Jimmy," Judy said looking broken-hearted. "You're a good man, Jimmy. You'd never let her be hurt. For Dad and Uncle Eli to suggest you'd put anything above her…"
"Thanks Short Stuff," I said giving her a hug. "Now you want to tell me about Thor over there?"
"You mean Erik?"
"Yeah, Mister tall, blond and Nordic."
"I'll have you know that he's really a very nice guy," she defended. "I think he really cares for me."
"And how do you feel about him?" I asked.
"I told you…he's really nice."
"Uh-huh…"
"And handsome."
"Judy…I'm a guy and even I can see he's good looking," I told her. "I'm asking if you care about him as much as he cares about you. Or if his being here has anything to do with Dan Shapiro being here with that leggy blonde."
"Jimmy," she grumbled rolling her eyes.
"Don't you Jimmy me, young lady."
That got her laughing.
"Alright," she finally said. "I did want Dan to see me with Erik…but Erik and I have been seeing each other for a little while now. I do like him. I won't say it's love exactly…but I like him."
"Be careful, Short Stuff," I cautioned. "You don't want to be that girl that goes around breaking hearts or something."
"Only you could think I was even capable of something like that," she giggled. "I think that's what I like best about having a big brother. At least someone thinks…"
"What?" I interrupted. "Someone thinks that you're pretty? Judy, I assure you, I'm hardly alone there. You and your sister don't see what you've got but you can both turn men completely inside out."
"I'm not thirteen anymore, Jimmy."
"I know and even when you were, I wouldn't even think of patronizing you. He really likes you. I mean really likes you. Don't make him think it's more mutual than it is…and please don't use him. I don't know him that well but no one deserves that."
I think I got through to her. Maybe not. I know they saw each other a while longer but then one or the other of them broke it off. Maybe it just wasn't destined. Maybe Judy saw that she was just using him. Maybe Erik didn't really have the deep feelings for her it looked like he was developing on that New Year's Eve. Maybe a lot of things. Joanie probably knew what it was. They talked all the time. But no one ever filled me in on it. Not that it mattered.
Judy dated a lot. I don't know how she could still play that I only said nice things to her because I was her brother-in-law. I would've thought she might at least believe one or two of the men who asked her out. She didn't date ugly guys either. They were all good looking and smart.
After that first dance, I got my Joanie back. I had kind of kept an eye on Erik and he was every bit the gentleman. I didn't stop watching him when he got my sister-in-law in his arms either. He treated her like she was something precious. Of course, I'm sure you know that to me she was. I could've been alright with it if it had worked out between them.
Getting Joanie back was like heaven…and hell. I could dance closer to her and she was mine. But she was wearing that dress with the satin clinging to her every very feminine curve and her cleavage just begging…yeah, remembering her in that dress still gets me a little worked up.
There was something really great about dancing with Joanie that night while she looked like a complete sex kitten. Nearly every man in that room looked like he would give his right arm to be in my shoes.
I scanned the jealous faces for the one who would only be happy to see her looking so terrific.
"Joanie, where's Aaron?" I asked. "Didn't he come home for the holidays?"
"He was home for Chanukkah," she said. "Remember, we saw him at temple. But he went back to New York right after. He missed Gene."
"Where was Gene?"
"New York…It's uncomfortable for Aaron to bring him here. They can't exactly…well, they don't know where to stay and they can't attend this party together…it's just hard for them."
I guess I understood. There were places in New York where they could have something like a date and they had their own apartment where they could live like me and Joanie and they didn't have any of that in Michigan. Uncle Eli and Aunt Naomi liked Gene and loved their son but I can imagine it was still strange. Hell, it is today in places.
I was sad not to see Aaron and I was sad for Joanie too. He was still her best friend besides Sherry…and I guess me. She talked on the phone with him sometimes and they wrote letters but it wasn't the same. I knew she missed him and I knew he wished he could be more present for her with all she'd been through.
Even as I swayed with my beautiful wife to the music, I spared a glance to Kid. I could see him still valiantly twirling Lou around the floor. He was doing alright and from time to time I could see something close to peace cross his face. I knew he must have caught the scent of his wife's hair or felt her relax against him. Something that felt good and right and normal. The peaceful look never lasted long but I could see it from time to time all the same.
Lou clung to him like she was reminding herself he was really there.
"Lou looks so pretty tonight," Joanie mused. "She made that dress herself, you know."
"Did she really? She's pretty talented."
"She was worried she wouldn't fit in. I think her dress looks nicer than most of the ones here tonight. If she ever wanted to give up nursing, she could make a tidy sum as a dressmaker."
"I don't see that happening," I said. "She's worked too hard."
Joanie just nodded against me.
It felt so good in her arms that I almost forgot to keep an eye on Kid and Lou. But I lifted my eyes in time to see the whole scene. Kid was dancing slower and slower and the pain was showing on his face more and more. He wasn't strong then. He'd been so thin and weak and his leg…well, there was hardly any muscle left in it.
I watched Lou's body language change and she tried to help him to the table. He shook off her attempts to help him so forcefully that I thought he might knock her down. I wanted to go to help him…or her. But I knew I shouldn't.
"Do you need to go to him?" Joanie asked. I think she thought me not going to him was because I didn't want to leave her. That was only part of it.
"If he won't take her help, he for sure won't take mine."
I watched as Kid made it back to the table and saw Lou lean to him, try to kiss his cheek, hold his hand. He pulled away from her and said something with an angry expression on his face. Next I saw Lou head for the bar with a stricken look on her face.
I felt Joanie tense in my arms. She knew as well as I did that things were not going well.
"James, I'm thirsty," she said. "Would you get me something to drink?"
I nodded and gave her a quick kiss before heading to the bar and sliding up next to Lou who was waiting for Kid's drink.
"You going to be alright?" I asked after ordering drinks for me and Joanie.
"He just has his moods now," Lou said softly. "I need to get used to them. It's not his fault you know."
"I know it better than most you'd talk to," I reminded her. "Don't forget I'm always here for you if you need me or if you think he does."
"He thinks he can do everything himself," she told me. "Or he thinks he has to as some kind of punishment."
"Kid still has his pride, Lou. He needs to still feel like a man and it might be antiquated but a man doesn't have to be tended to by his wife. The fact that he needs to lean on you so much right now hurts him. You've done so much all alone and he wants to be able to jump right in and he can't."
"How do I make him see I don't care about that?"
I shook my head.
"You don't," I replied picking up the drink for Joanie. "This isn't about what matters to you. It's about what matters to him."
I made my way back to the table to see Joanie talking with Kid. I don't know why I felt afraid of that scene. I knew Joanie was smart and wasn't going to press him or talk about something that would upset him. I think I just felt anxious about Kid in general and protective of him too. For too long I hadn't been able to protect him. Terrible things had happened while I was nowhere to be found for him and I felt I owed him something.
Kid seemed to be doing alright talking to Joanie and his shoulders even seemed to relax a little. His eyes still searched the room for Lou periodically but not frantically like earlier in the night. I even saw a small smile.
I slid into my seat next to Joanie and put her rum and coke in front of her before taking a sip of my scotch and soda.
Joanie kept talking as she leaned into me. One of her arms draped lazily around my shoulders and I could feel her fingers absently twirling in the hair at the nape of my neck. She took a sip of her drink before resting her head on my shoulder. I fought to pay attention to what was being said.
I was shocked to hear Joanie talking about a peace march. And even more shocked that Kid was listening intently.
He didn't look afraid or haunted. He looked angry…but not at Joanie. I think she was offering him a way to focus his anger. I know he never felt the same about the war or the government or the military after all he'd been through. Few would. He didn't hate the military really but he'd seen decisions made that would torture him for the rest of his days and he didn't really believe in the war itself anymore. Or maybe it was the way the war was handled by the politicians in charge. I don't know exactly and it was a very, very long time before he truly let me in on even a little of it.
I think the long and short of it was that he felt like he was set up for failure. All of the men over there were. They were in a losing fight and not given the means to win and then they came home discreetly to no fanfare or ticker tape parades.
Joanie talked of people advocating peace. People marching in an effort to bring the boys home where they belonged. It appealed to him.
Once Joanie got Kid talking, he was different. He was almost like...almost...well, he was talking and that was a improvement over the Kid he'd been since coming home. He decided the next march, he'd go with Joanie. I couldn't see the harm in it. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and slap the stupid out of myself.
But it was good for a while. He seemed to have a mission and a plan and that cleared the way for him to engage with us in conversation.
He talked about the boys and how big they'd gotten and how smart they were. His voice hinted at the pain of how much he missed with them but his words spoke of the future and little league games and things like that.
Kid talked about Theresa too. There was greater sadness there. I don't think it was for the missed time but I think she was finding it more of an adjustment to have him home and she was a very dramatic teenage girl. When he'd left, she'd barely been a teen at all and certainly had none of the attitude that had come with becoming a high school student. She challenged him and I think he missed the easy way they'd had with one another before he'd gone.
Things were going pretty good until it got closer to midnight and the champagne corks started popping. Honestly, you'd think that as much as I cared for the man that I would have seen it coming but the first pops nearly made Kid jump out of his skin. I thought he might dive under the table but instead he was just frozen, his only movements coming in his fast shallow breaths. He sat there gripping the table as if it might save him, while his darted everywhere at once. He would surely pass out if I didn't get him some air.
I went around the table to him and nudged Erik on the way so he could come and help me. Erik hung back a little while I bent over and talked softly in Kid's ear.
"You're okay," I said. "Somewhere inside you know you are. It's okay. I'm going to help you stand up now so you can get some air. Erik here is going to help too. No one is going to hurt you."
Nothing in his body language changed so I nodded to Erik as I gently put a hand on Kid's shoulder. I watched as he bit his lip to keep from making a sound and he seemed to curl in on himself. Of course loud popping and someone grabbing him probably meant something else to him now.
Erik looked at me in question.
"I have to get him outside," I said and I knew Kid wasn't hearing anything I said so I didn't bother keeping my voice down too much.
Erik and I got him up and practically had to drag him out. His legs were pulled up a little and he wouldn't help us move him. For being as thin as he still was, it took everything Erik and I had to carry him like that. He was practically dead weight in our arms.
Everyone else in the room was too jubilant of the nearing New Year to notice us and I was grateful for that. We got Kid outside and into the cold almost January air. Kid must've felt that air on his face because he at least put his feet down so we could stand him up and let him lean a little against a post at the front of the building.
He still stood rigidly. I nodded at Erik that we were alright and mouthed a thank you to him as well. He went back inside and it was just me and Kid.
Just me and Kid…like it had been for most of our lives. Just us against the whole big, bad world. I kept my hand on his shoulder to steady him and kept my mouth shut. He knew I was there. He knew he could talk if he needed to. He knew he could keep quiet and that was fine too. We just stood there like that for a while.
I felt his breathing return to normal under my hand and the tension leave his shoulders. From inside I heard the countdown and then the happy cheer of midnight. About the time the first strains of Auld Lang Syne wafted out to us, we probably just looked like a couple of guys checking out the stars in the clear winter night.
"Happy New Year, Jimmy," he said quietly.
"Happy New Year, Kid," I replied.
A couple minutes later, Lou came out with Kid's coat. She looked like she might have been crying. I nodded to her that things were better.
When Kid saw her, he grabbed her and pulled her into a tight hug.
I was about to duck out of the scene that I clearly wasn't meant to witness when Lou spoke.
"I think we're going to head for home, Jimmy. I'm not used to keeping hours like this anymore and I'm likely to fall asleep at the wheel if I stay any longer."
I don't think she was tired at all. She just knew Kid was done for the night and she needed to get him home.
I smiled at her.
"Happy New Year, Lou," I said as cheerily as I could. "Drive safe."
She nodded as she helped Kid on with his coat. The valet brought their car around and they were gone.
I went back inside to find my wife. It's customary to kiss in the New Year and I was hoping she was still waiting for me and hadn't decided to find a more dependable pair of lips.
I had no cause for worry. She was right inside the door watching for me. We were out of the view of most of the party guests so I took the opportunity to hold her tight to me and kiss her like I usually wouldn't in public.
We decided to leave right about then too. The party would go on for a little while still but suddenly we were more in a mood to celebrate privately.
Joanie was cuddled to me all the way home. From time to time she planted soft kisses on my neck. There was no mention of Kid or his problems. There was just the two of us.
Once we got home, we went in and I took her coat and hung it up in the closet with mine. I heard something that sounded like a zipper and turned around just as she dropped that dress right in the middle of the living room.
All I could do was stare. It wasn't the first time that night she had rendered me speechless. I'm not complaining. Only a fool would complain about a voluptuous nearly naked woman in his living room.
I look back on it now and wonder about that woman. There was a power she held over me from the first moment I saw her standing in her little circle skirt and saddle shoes beside her 'Vette all those years before. Before she had pulled that car into Al's garage I'd sworn off women entirely. I'd held out for most of a year. In a matter of seconds, she changed everything.
So I stood there marveling at the beauty of my wife as she stood there in her garter belt, panties and stockings. I guess it's alright that I couldn't think to move. Joanie had plenty of ideas about what she wanted to do. I felt all kinds of stirrings in my body as she sauntered toward me.
She said earlier that she wasn't done with me and I'm telling you, she wasn't lying.
This one took forever it seemed. I really had wanted to blow past New Year's...but then I realized that too much happened at the Country Club party and a fair amount of it is kind of important.
This would not have come together at all without my dear Beulah! She is a gem and worked tirelessly on this even as she was in the middle of work stress and trying to get her own next chapter finished (Beulah is Sunnybrook in case you didn't know and she is writing the brilliant Rock Creek High story. If you haven't checked that one out...you MUST! It is an amazing story!) Thank you dear, sweet Beulah. You keep me sane and honest and on track and for that...well, words cannot express how much I appreciate it.
So I hope you dear and faithful readers have enjoyed reading about J&J ringing in 1968. Now, in the words of the great Bette Davis, "fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy ride!" Yeah...if you thought 1967 was fraught with tsuris (yiddish for troubles) then, babies, you ain't seen NOTHIN' yet! - J