Helga G Pataki: Hillwood's New Superhero

by KlutzyMaiden123

As if my life hadn't already been difficult. I already had to watch the love of my life, Arnold, make goo-goo eyes at little Miss Perfect, Lila Sawyer, while completely ignoring me. Now, I have to juggle school, keeping my feelings for him secret and battling evil dressed in a skimpy bathing suit, all the while keeping my lifestyle as a superhero from my nosey classmates.

24. Terms and Conditions

Apologies for how long this chapter took! There were issues with editing so I quickly went over it myself but on the bright side, this is a long chapter. The next one is shorter but this, this is 40+ pages, so hopefully that can make up for the time between chapters.

Also, I was able to find the image that originally inspired Blue Jay's outfit, so I made a post on my tumblr with visuals to better illustrate what the girls all look like in their Guardian forms! Feel free to check it out if you're curious.

---

The sun set.

Dawn came.

Then went.

Now, stars burned high in the night, untainted from the city lights. They sparkled like shattered glass across the ocean, swirling and splattering in rich shades. The air was smooth and lifted my braid, sliding along the back of my neck. I breathed it all in, feeling it spiral like glass in my chest, and touched my arms.

It was night.

And Blue Jay was out.

Horns pierced the night air. Traffic was moving slowly and people were growing agitated. Red lights sprayed across the pavement, splashing across windows, and rolling past the store mannequins. Families moved across the streets, carrying warm and greasy bags of food, and young adults with dark bottles in their hands. Though the cars around them beeped, they were laughing, eager to get back to their homes and dance beneath the kitchen lights.

I shifted.

I could feel the magic buzzing within me, spinning in my chest and burning my skin as the wounds repaired themselves. The cut was still there. I sighed and moved my chin to my palm. My stomach had twisted itself in knots. I hadn't eaten since lunch today and it had been hours since school had ended. I should be at home, but I knew I couldn't. Today had already been a massive pain and I didn't need Bob making it worse. The school had left him a message so there was no way he wasn't already aware what had happened. Knowing him, the minute I walked through that door, accusations would go flying and I just didn't have it in me tonight. Not right now, at least.

An ache pressed deep against my chest. I couldn't help wishing for something different, something simple. A kitchen I could come home to where the table was set and the food hot. No drama. Just chatter. Meaningless and boring chatter. 'How was your day?' 'Fine. Traffic was bad, but what can you expect at this time? How was school?' 'Boring. Do I have to keep going?'

I wanted that.

Normal. Boring. Safe.

I straightened when I heard someone land softly behind me. I didn't turn, but I could feel them softly padding over towards me. Their steps were gentle, silent, but I could feel the vibrations against my palms through the cement.

I lowered my face.

"You haven't been home," she said without a greeting. She settled beside me, tail wrapping around her legs, and watched me. "Bob is going demented waiting for you."

My lips quirked. This was the first time in days I would be speaking one–on–one with Nel.

"That's a first."

There was a pause.

"What was that about today, Helga?" I could feel her disapproval over my shoulder. "I thought you knew better than to let your jealousy escape you."

"Is it smart to call me that out here?"

"Helga."

I sighed, sitting up so I could cross my legs.

"I just—why her?" I clasped my ankles and felt a massive weight lodge into my shoulders. It moved down to my chest and squeezed until it became hard to breathe. I avoided Nel's stare. "Why Rhonda? What's it about her that makes her a Guardian? She—she's awful. And selfish and bratty an—and fuck! Did you see her today?"

"Yes, and I've also seen you," Nel told me. "Helga, you would know better than anyone that fighting like that isn't easy especially with how quickly she's been thrusted into this world."

"I managed it well enough."

"You still had your missteps," she pointed out. "You jump straight into action. You fail to hold yourself back long enough to think things through or let your team keep up. It isn't fair to hold what happened today against her when it was her first fight. She was scared Helga, and fear makes people do awful things."

A knot burned my throat, and I slowly raised my face. City lights crawled over my features as the ache spread, burning hot against my skin. I knew she was right, she always was, but I was still reluctant. There was a heaviness that continued to drag, anchoring me down against the floor and preventing me from forgiving her. Or even understanding her.

Finally, I turned to Nel. "Do you know why she was chosen?"

"Not as of yet but I've come to believe that truth always reveals itself. I'm sure Rhonda will make a wonderful Guardian once she has properly adjusted," she watched the stars as she said this. There was a warmth to her gaze, like though she was still disappointed in my actions, she wasn't mad. Concerned, maybe. I didn't know how to feel about it. But the look disappeared when she turned to me with a sad smile. "You do not believe me."

I curled my lips to the side and looked away. I wanted too; Nel was my mentor. She seemed to know everything. But I couldn't get what Serec had said out of my head. That she had known who he was all along and lied to me about it. Even when I had pleaded for information from her. What else had she lied about?

She sighed.

"Sometimes, Helga, good people make mistakes," she said. "That shouldn't let you think of them as bad people. It makes them human."

Her statement made me frown when a cruel gust of wind crashed over me. It was a knife to my cheek. I grimaced, feeling the cut stir up in a painful sensation. It was like someone was pressing down on it and sinking their nails into the crevice. I gently pressed my fingers to it, wondering why it was taking longer for it to heal, and opened my mouth when a horrifying scream pressed against my head.

My fingers moved to my temples, and I squeezed my eyes shut. The throbbing rippled across my temples, flaring down my neck in waves that made the night swell around me. It felt like hours when it finally stopped, and in seconds, I was back on my feet.

Moonlight slid and wrapped me in silver, pushing my silhouette dark against the roof.

Nel watched with mild alarm. "Helga, you aren't going, are you?"

I shot out a wire and watched as it hooked onto a ledge across from us.

"Seeya at home, Nel," I gave her a small salute and kicked off.

---

Led by the sensations in my chest, I wound up at an abandoned parking garage. Screams were blasting in my ears until my feet had slammed into the ground, when it was replaced with a ringing silence that made my head spin. Wires snapped back into my wrists, and I flexed my fingers, lightly tapping my vambraces. They were still warm and beating against my skin.

I sucked in a small breath.

The air had stung my face but now that I had stopped, warmth clouded my skin. Sounds rushed back in; I could hear the traffic down the block. Chatter that regular ears should not have been able to pick up. Hopefully, they didn't have plans of heading down here; I didn't need anyone getting in the way

Lowering my face, I crept inside.

The space was wide and empty, unsurprisingly. The sky was darkening, and people wanted to be home. It was safer to drive to their houses rather than stay out nowadays. They would rather see their hot dinners and pink–faced children than terrorising monsters. But it wasn't completely empty, I could see two lone cars parked on the other side of the garage.

And looking past, I saw the Mutants.

Pressing myself into the support beams, I rolled the back of my head against the cement. Heartbeats echoed soft in my ears, and I peered around the beam to the Mutants. There were three—one with tentacles for arms and a wide mouth, another with a silver body and bug–like eyes, and the last was a colossal brute with fiery skin and three arms.

The pulse in my ears sank until it rattled in my stomach. Tentacles had its arms wrapped around a human couple, who had since stopped struggling and looked close to passing out. Its black mouth was open, liquid dripping from the corners. A yellow mist hovered, moving from their faces to the Mutants' open mouth.

I clamped my mouth shut, feeling another throb in my cheek. The Mutants looked tough but there were only three of them. That shouldn't be too difficult.

Flattening my palm against the beam, a warmth surged down from my arm to my fingers. I threw myself into a roll and felt cold cement against my knees before I flung out the glowing sphere. Shadows retreated as it darted across the garage. The Mutants looked up when the barrier slammed into Tentacles, knocking it to the ground, and the couple fell. I raised my hands and two glowing spheres wrapped around them before they could hit the ground.

My heartbeat was buzzing in my stomach as they hovered.

A breath escaped me. That was close.

Screeches rushed from Red and Bug Eyes as they swivelled around and raced in my direction. I curled my lips to the side and lowered my hands. The barriers followed suit, sinking to the ground before dissipating, leaving the couple gently settled. Well, as gently as you can manage having just had your energy sucked dry from a thing that resembles Slenderman.

I turned my eyes back to my opponents and reached into my boot.

It felt good to have my knife back again. It hadn't been long, but it still felt like centuries had passed since I had taken this form and felt these abilities. It made me more sensitive to the warmth that collected in my bones, a sweet dewiness that twisted in my joints. I sucked in another breath and sent the knife flying, feeling rather than hearing the blade sing.

It sailed for Red, but the Mutant ducked out of the way and rolled across the floor. I released a noise and turned just as Bug Eyes made a wild swing for me. I slid around on the balls of my feet and jerked my elbow towards its face. But instead of knocking into its nose, I felt a hard palm instead. Fingers wrapped around my elbow, digging into my skin, and I pressed my teeth together.

My instincts turned to spikes; I wrapped my hands around its hand. Sucked in a breath, tightened my stomach. Then dug my heels into the ground, bending my knees, and heaved the Mutant over my shoulder. Its weight dug sharply into my bones before disappearing and my vision shifted to the ground.

I bent over my knees, panting. The dull ache haunted my bones, building in my arms to my fingertips. The air had turned warm around my face. My hair was propped snug against my skin. But a nullifying sensation crept beneath my skin, soaking up the pain, and curling in my muscles.

There was a thud! and I lifted my eyes. The Mutant had hit the ground but was already rolling back onto its hands and knees. I bared my teeth and raised my hand. Warmth collected in my fingers as I slashed down the air. The knife flashed over my shoulder and sank into the Mutant's chest. I turned on my heels and ran before the explosion hit me when something smacked into my temples.

It sent me flying into a column, where pain exploded in my cheek, and the world started spinning. I wasn't aware that I was moving until the ground came up hard against my body. It was cold and clattered painfully into my bones. The roof was twisting in knots, trying to keep me down, and I pushed hard against the ground to force myself up.

I touched my cheek, feeling the blood soak my nails, and raised my eyes.

Tentacles was glaring and waved its arms by its sides like they were made from jelly. From the right, I could sense Red lifting itself from the ground.

Balling my fingers into a fist, I rubbed the blood from my cheek then wiped it on my pants.

"Well," I looked between the two monsters. "This just isn't fair."

Flinging out my arm, the wire hooked into the roof and launched me into the air. The wind clashed against my eyes as I twisted my body into a flip and landed on my feet, between both Mutants.

Seconds ticked like a drum in my neck as I glanced between them.

They both let out howls and darted in my direction. Pressing my lips together, the wire dragged me back into the air and I swivelled my body. My feet slammed into Tentacles' chest and as it flew backwards, I threw a forcefield behind me. It slammed into Red and as I looked over my shoulder, the Mutant was slammed against the wall, where a crack split the concrete behind its shoulders.

I landed in a crouch and looked at Tentacles. It howled and bolted forwards. Pressing my lips together, I raised my hand. The air twisted and lapped between my eyes and a blur arc hurtled from my palm, slamming into the Mutant. It sent the creature to its knees. Feeling my wire snap back into my arm, I ran forward and pushed up into a leap. The ground left my feet and spinning my body, I swung out my foot in a vicious swipe. But just as I was about to hit the Mutant, it looked up and acted quickly.

Its tentacles shot out and wrapped around my ankle. My stomach slammed into my throat as I was swung violently towards the wall. Throwing my hands out, a warmth buzzed between my eyes and a forcefield pressed into my fingers.

The light made my skin glow red and slip down my arms in smooth vibrations. Twisting my waist, I felt the forcefield shifting so it could wrap around me in a bubble. My vision became a cool tide, and an electrical heat danced across my body. The sharp edges sliced through Tentacles' arms and when I looked, they had fallen to the ground in green splatters. Tentacles screamed, a sound that blasted my ears, and held onto its mutilated limbs.

Swallowing, I pulled my legs close to my chest. I could feel the energy moving through me like tunnels had formed in my veins. It sparked hot flashes that pulsed from the corners of my eyes. Twisting my wrist, I felt the forcefield shift again and kicked off from the barrier. The energy simmered over my face before dissipating as I soared through the air.

I swiped out my foot and felt it smack into Tentacles' face. The Mutant flew backwards, and I landed in a crouch, swinging out my arm. The knife flew past my shoulder and sunk into the Mutants' chest. Jabbing my hand out, a forcefield wrapped around me before the explosion went off. It slammed against the barrier in a thunderous boom, sending heat onto the glimmering wall.

But the air around me stayed cool. I rose to my feet, feeling my braid slip down my shoulders, and leaned over my knees. I needed to catch my breath. But behind the pale light, I caught a flash of movement from the corner of my eyes. Turning my head, I noticed the couple racing past without sparing a glance and throwing themselves into their cars.

Their tires squeaked against the ground as they drove for the entrance. Moving past me, they whirled out the front and down the road, disappearing without a trace.

I stared after them and lifted my arms. "You're welcome."

There was a noise and I whirled around. It was Red and boy, did it look royally pissed.

The forcefield disappeared, and an influx of warm air scattered across my temples. I lowered my chin and pressed my lips together, wrapping my fingers around the knife when it flew back into my palm.

"Okay," I said to myself. "Last one—let's go."

I stepped forward and leapt into the air, feeling blue sparks gather around my wrists. But before I could shoot them, the Mutant swung and wrapped its thick fingers around my arm, throwing me backwards. My vision blurred as I soared but moving my teeth together, I swung out my arm. The sparks moved to my fingers and a forcefield shot out from my palms. Heaving my body around, I felt the firmness press into my feet and kicked off from it, landing crouched on the ground.

Red's gaze shot through me and I curled my lips to the side, punching the air. It sent a wire flying across the space between us, shooting straight into the Mutant's abdomen. It howled and clutched itself as green splattered everywhere.

Rising to my feet, I twisted my weight around. My temples started pulsating as my hands glowed. Heat climbed up my neck, curling in my joints, and the weight became lighter. Bending my knees and tightening my stomach, I heaved.

Tension rolled from my shoulders but Red was swept up and smashed into the wall. There was a soft whir in my ears as the magic disappeared and I let out a breathe. The wire snapped back into my arm and, flipping the knife in my hand, I raced for Red. It was picking itself up when it heard footsteps and snapped its gaze back up.

Lips pulled back, I swung for its neck. It snarled and struck, wrapping a hand around my wrist. The knife glazed its neck, centimetres from the mark, but froze in its spot. I tried moving, but I was stuck. The Mutant had an iron–like grip. My knees buckled. I tried pushing against it, but my feet slid against the floor.

Pressure built in my throat; I kept my teeth together. It smirked, recognising the pain, and twisted my wrist. A searing pain burned in my bones and I screamed. The knife slipped from my fingers. Biting my lip, I swung to catch it with my other hand, but Red wrapped its fingers around my fist. I gasped, and the knife cluttered to the ground. It echoed loud and hot in my ears. A pulse rushed and curled in my jaw. I slowly rose my eyes. It dawned on me how much this thing towered over me; it was nearly twice my height and with a whole other arm.

Droplets slid down my temples. Everything felt so hot, bursting over my skin in thick waves. I gritted my teeth, forehead pounding, then slammed my face forward. But before my forehead could smash into its jaw, something slammed into my chin. My head flew back, but my wrists were yanked, keeping me from falling, and I was jerked forwards.

A dark flash came from the side, cranking upwards, and sunk into my stomach. I gasped, spit bubbling from my lips. The air dissipated from my chest and without it, my upper body caved. I thought I could taste my breakfast as I hacked, the walls beginning to move.

Through it, I heard laughter. It burned and moved around me; I gritted my teeth. Its piercing gaze seared the back of my neck, and I felt anger flare in my chest. I lifted my knee and slammed it into its abdomen. There was a squelching sound that made my stomach twist, and a liquid soaked through to my fabric.

The Mutant roared, freeing me to wrap its hands around its wounded side. Pain wrung my wrist as I lifted my hand. It echoed soft in my bones, but I could feel the knife gliding towards me. It was with a trace of magic that was cool compared to the warm air sloshing over my face. It was a chilling feeling from the corner of my head, growing wider and wider the closer it got until it was swinging over my shoulder.

I felt it hitting Red in the collarbone and swung around. The forcefield shimmered as I ran, buzzing as the explosion plumed over me, and swung me forward. But the lights left me untouched. Heat climbed my collar, burning and pumping in my throat, and I eventually came to a stop when the air cleared.

The forcefield disappeared in a swirl, and a warmth crashed over me. The air burned rich and pressed to the sides of my face. My heartbeat danced in my ears. There was still tension in my throat and my gut was throbbing. I sucked in a breath. It felt like the walls wanted to suffocate me. I moved my fingers over my side, grimacing at the painful spasm then touched my cheek. It still stung but it was mostly cleared at this point. I curled my lips. Good, it took longer than it should, but it was almost something of the past now.

Silence rang in my ears and I raised my head, looking where the Mutant had been. I frowned. Was that it?

I looked around frantically but came to a halt when my eyes caught onto a familiar sight.

My jaw dropped. "Are you kidding me?"

"Hello to you too, asshole."

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"What do you think?" Rhonda retorted and mimicked my stance, putting her hands on her hips. Shadows slipped down her form like coffee, and her eyes burned through the mask. She was pissed although why I had no idea. I was the one who had actually done the work. She just so happened to get here when it had been finished. Her eyebrows raised, like she had read my mind, and she began stalking towards me.

"I think I just took down three Mutants on my own while my apparent 'teammate' watched form the sidelines," I scrunched my face and made bunny ear gestures. Rhonda came to a sharp halt and slammed her lips shut. I continued though because I didn't care. Injured or not, I wasn't afraid of Rhonda. "Am I wrong?"

She said nothing.

I snorted.

"That's what I thought," I murmured and tucked my knife back into my boot. I began moving for the exit, no longer concerned with this. I didn't have time for Rhonda right now. I was tired, I was angry and all I wanted was to be in my bed.

"You think you have me all figured out, huh?" she suddenly spoke up, voice growing into a growl when I passed her.

I stopped and turned around. "What?"

"You think you have it all worked out—who I am," her hands rolled into fists. "That I'm a spoilt bitch, incapable of thinking of anyone but myself, and that this is all just one big mistake!"

"You've yet to prove me wrong."

"I've yet to do anything!" she exclaimed, throwing her hands up in exasperation. "I just got started, forgive me for not immediately becoming Black fucking Widow!" I rolled my eyes. "You don't know shit about me, Pataki!"

"I don't need to, it's obvious! Your actions are loud enough!" I yelled, finally losing my temper. "You've done nothing but complain! From the beginning, all you have ever worried about was the money! You never thought about the human lives getting caught up in this, you only cared about property! Buildings can be remade, but human life cannot." She scrunched her face. "You never stopped insulting me or my work, and now—now that you're on this side of the fence, suddenly I should stop making assumptions about you?"

I hadn't realised that I'd been moving until I was standing inches from Rhonda. I was close enough to see her expression tick, how she lowered her chin, and her gaze flickered every few seconds. She pressed her lips together, trying to mask how she felt, but I could see how her mouth twitched, like she was barely restraining herself.

"You're exactly who I thought you were," I told her. "Nel made a mistake."

The words tasted like acid. I turned to leave when something slammed into my waist. The force propelled me forward, and the ground came up to hit my knees. I slammed my palms out onto the floor before I could collapse and blinked, catching up with what just happened.

"Do not tell me who I am," I heard Rhonda say.

My eyebrows knitted together. I sucked in a breath, pressing my lips together, then looked over my shoulder.

Rhonda was striding toward me. Something had flared in her eyes. I knew I should've been pissed—well, more than I already was—but instead, I felt relieved.

Wiping my face, I rose to my feet and turned back around.

"Let's finish what we started," I said.

"Watch your step this time."

My mouth twitched.

Rhonda stepped forward, keeping her eyes trained on me. Her face didn't move as she stared me down, expression growing darker and darker the closer that she got. The air was plump from the heat and fell down my shoulders like a curtain.

I swallowed.

'She was scared, Helga.'

I could feel the emotions twisting and pulling beneath my shirt. A pounding recoiling in my skin, making my fingers shake. I should be the better person—do whatever Lila would do and make peace. But I just couldn't get it out of my head—any of it. The way she had frozen up this morning, letting Lila take all of the hits, but seemingly was capable of fighting when it had been me. Nel was wrong—Rhonda wasn't a Guardian. She never should have been offered the role.

'And fear makes people do awful things.'

I lunged but Rhonda swivelled out of the way before my foot could hit her. I lost my balance and landed on my knees. Blood swam in my ears. Rhonda was spinning towards me. I twisted my wrists and a forcefield knocked her from her feet. A beating pressed into my forehead.

"Watch your back," I murmured, swinging around onto my feet. Standing over her, I slammed my foot down but Rhonda rolled out of the way. I hissed and kicked again, this time knocking her in the nose. She released a strangled noise, squeezing her eyes shut, and covered her nose.

The air rushed in against my temples. I kicked again when Rhonda's eyes snapped up to mine. Her hands wrapped around my ankle. The weight in my feet tipped and I flung out my arms. She pressed her lips together than heaved, and I was thrown backwards. The scream got caught in my throat as my stomach shot into my chest. The ground smacked into my back, shattering against my elbows, and a hollowness rung in my ears.

I clacked my teeth together, groaning. Pain erupted in my bones, hammering through my body, and I rubbed the back of my head. It made stars fold across my eyes. A headache settled over me like flashing lights. But through it, I could feel Rhonda's gaze, and when I looked, she was glaring.

The floor rippled when I scrambled to my feet. She copied my movements, standing up from the ground. The weight rocked in my feet as I adjusted, and I blinked a couple of times, moving my eyes back onto hers.

Her face twitched and a weight settled into my stomach. I threw myself forward and swung but she dodged. I swung again and felt Rhonda cave forward, bending at her waist as she held onto her face. I pressed my lips together and slammed my foot against her chest.

She was knocked against the wall. Her hands slammed to her sides, ankles knocking to the wall, and her head made a smacking noise. A strangled came from her throat, her expression crumbled like fabric. She lowered her chin for a moment, catching her breath, but her eyes jerked back to mine when I swung for her. She swerved to the side, but I struck again and wrapped my fingers around her neck.

"Why did you come here?!" I demanded.

She gritted her teeth together, squeezing her eyes shut. Blood dripped down her nose and across her lips. There was a bump on the bridge of her nose. It hadn't been there before. But before I could feel guilty about it, she slammed her vambrace into my temple. It knocked my head back as a throbbing exploded behind my left eye. Black spots dazzled my sight. Everything swayed to the side. Words ran and echoed in my ears. I clapped a hand to the tender spot when I felt Rhonda moving around me.

I swung around when a force slammed into my face. My head snapped to the left. Dark spots stung my face, and a reverberating ache crushed my skull. The floor rocked beneath my feet, and my senses knocked to the side. I threw out a hand and felt it connect with the wall. I sucked in several breaths but could feel it backfiring across my nose. I clutched my head and shook myself. Why did it hurt so much?

A hand than appeared around my neck and pressed hard. It knocked me backwards until the wall was against my bones. The collusion echoed sharp in my ears as cold, black spots sliced across my face. The world spiralled, growing hotter, unstable. The fingers pressed into my flesh. I watched everything spin, washed beneath a watery haze. I couldn't see her beneath the tears, but I could make out her figure.

Reaching up, I grabbed a fistful of hair and yanked hard. She yelped but before I could move, she wrapped her other hand around my wrist. I clamped my lips together. Her grip was strong, it felt like my bones were being crushed. There was an echoing thud and from the corner of my eye, I recognised her foot slammed into the wall beside my waist.

My vision was so blotched, I could barely move. I blinked rapidly and felt the headache move until it had slashed down my senses. The nauseating weight was moving down my body and I suddenly wanted to puke my guts out.

Rhonda suddenly pushed her weight against the wall. I squeaked, finding myself lifted from the ground. She kicked again and used the momentum to slam herself into the ground and me into the air.

There was a split second where all I could see was the roof. A stretch of pallid grey as shadows clawed from the corners of my vision. But then the ground rushed back up to crack into my spine and shadows became all that I could see. Everything became louder. I could feel breakfast shooting against my ribs. It was like someone had done something to my head, so my thoughts were no longer silent. I could feel my heartbeat vibrating. The pain rattling in my bones. The thunder crashing in the ground.

It had become very hot, like someone had pressed a warm cloth over my eyes. I tried blinking it all away. It must have been working. The shadows were shrinking instead of expanding. My vision became a battle of light and dark as my head spun and spun and spun.

The walls were beating. But through it all, I felt my head tap against something and when I heard someone letting out a gasp, I knew that I had landed against Rhonda.

"Are you kidding me?!" I screamed at her.

My hands were already folding around my abdomen. I could feel my stomach move as I swung onto my side, getting onto my hands and knees. My vision swayed and pushed me to the left. I stumbled as my heart threatened to fall from my ribs.

Through the hot clouds that danced around me, I could see Rhonda mirroring my actions. She didn't look nearly as messed up as I was; she had blood smeared beneath her nose and down her chin, but her bones were still intact. It pissed me off because I wasn't sure I could say the same.

Her glare was piercing as she climbed back onto her knees.

"Why are you here?!" I heard myself repeat only it came out strangled because everything was still unstable. The walls were hot and sloppy like marmalade; dancing, crashing and trying to force me down. Through the mess, I saw Rhonda swing for me. The scream caught in my throat as I ducked beneath it and jabbed my fist into her stomach. "I can do this on my own, I don't need saving!"

Rhonda released a noise, having bent at the waist to cover her wheezing. Her eyes rose and slammed back into mine and she clapped her palms together into a joint fist. She then swung upwards and knocked it into my jaw. The sound of my upper and lower rows of teeth making an unplanned contact rattled me. It made everything vibrate and spin as the air collected like blood clots across my face. The floor then slammed into my back. Hands wrapped around my neck and a weight pushed into my waist.

"I didn't come for you!" Rhonda was suddenly inches from my face.

Everything was too warm, but I slammed my fist down on the insides of her elbows. The joints in her arms folded, releasing me, and I slammed a fist into her face. It knocked her from me and onto the ground. The heat rushed across me as I rolled on top of her, pushing my forearm against my neck.

"Then, why did you come here, Rhonda?!"

"For fuck's sake, does it fuckin' matter?!" she demanded. "I'm here for the exact reason you are—to fight."

I scoffed. "You call that fighting?!"

"Look, I was trying, alright?!"

"You trying left someone hurt and could've had someone else killed!" I gritted out. "This is exactly what I'm talking about, you could phase through me, right now! You could defeat me and yet you don't. You say you want to help but you stand around and do nothing! How the fuck do you expect to ever win if you—"

She slammed a fist into my side.

Pain erupted in my abdomen. I jerked my hands back, wrapping them around my side, and coughed. I coughed and coughed and coughed. Not just because it had been a hard hit, but because I was tired. I had taken so many hits—some a lot harder than others—and my vision was spinning. Twisting. Whirling. If I didn't stop now, I could feel my stomach . . .

I rolled off from Rhonda and sat backwards, sucking in large gulps of air. Pressing my palms to the ground. The pavement was cold, it felt good against my skin. I shut my eyes, letting the feeling anchor me back down, and tried to ignore how everything was moving on its own.

I could feel Rhonda shuffling—moving. But she wasn't going to attack me. I knew she wouldn't. She was strong but I had been training longer than her. Even with as many hits as I had taken, I could last far longer than her. I could keep pushing myself to fight, no matter how many injuries I sustained. And she knew that.

I raised my chin and felt the air move against my neck. Nausea was rolling along my chest like a little ball, going wherever it pleased. Now that it was finally quiet—or at least, moreso than before—I could feel the extent of the hits. I could feel how sore my bones had become. They weren't broken, but they moved far stiffer than before. It hurt to breathe. The air hit colder spots on my face, where the skin had split and blood was pouring out.

I wiped my face, feeling the red smear across my cheek, and looked back to Rhonda. Glared. "How—"

"I don't have powers, okay?!"

I froze.

So did she, like she realised what she had just said.

Her clouded expression cleared, the lines smoothing between her brow, and her eyes went to her hands. They were covered in dirt now. She had laid them across her knees, palms facing upwards, and the closer I looked, I realised that her fingers were shaking.

Rhonda shook her head with a melancholic twist to her lips and looked away.

"I don't have my powers," she repeated to herself. "I've tried—been trying—since that day at the Wonder Park, but I . . ." she glanced down. "They're gone . . . I can't—" she wiped her nose with the back of her hand. "You're right—I was unfair. I thought I knew what I was talking about, but I didn't. Shouldn't be so surprising, Nathalie is always complaining that I don't know how to take the L.I always have to dig my heels in to prove myself to everyone else. Not for the sake of the argument, but . . . my pride. I don't like looking stupid, I feel . . . anyway, I just wish it wasn't in such a painful way this time," she then smiled. Blinked against her tears. "Nel made a mistake. You're right. I'm not cut out for this—any of this. It's just . . . not who I am."

Rhonda had hunched, folding in on herself as if she didn't want to be seen. But the light moved through the entrance and pushed her shadow across my eyes, so I had nothing else but her to see. One wrist was between her fingers, blood caked her nails. She wiped her nose again, but she had pushed the blood so it created a bigger smear across her right cheek, making her look even more messed up.

My throat clenched. I didn't know what to say. This wasn't the Rhonda I had known since we were kids, who had cried at the thought of breaking her nails. The one who took days off from school whenever she woke up to weirdly grotesque marks on her face that were too gross to be zits. The one who had almost kept her entire English class back because she was adamant that Sid's perception of feminist heroes was warped, because Elle Woods was a perfectly acceptable character and wearing pink didn't invalidate that (in her defence, she had made such good points that I had actually decided to check out Legally Blonde when I got home that day. Turns out, she was right).

I was used to Rhonda being loud and annoying and herself. She may have had a different face now, but it was still shocking to hear this coming from her mouth.

But I guess, in a way, it wasn't.

Memories washed over me in a cold haze. I remembered being in her position, folded in on myself and weighed down with so much uncertainty. The nausea moved so it had splayed across my chest but became so cold that it was like something was dragging me down. A weight had taken its place, it was bitter yet familiar. It was a feeling that never went away, like you had the entire world on your shoulders but nothing to lift it. And it made my stomach twist that I had unintentionally become a part of Rhonda's weight too.

"I lost my powers too," I heard myself say.

She paused and glanced up.

"Those first two weeks, ever wonder why you hadn't seen reports about Blue Jay using her forcefields?" Sadly, I smiled. "I'd lost them."

She stared. "But . . . you—"

"I have them now, yes, but only because I trained hard to get them back," I told her. "It didn't happen overnight. It didn't even happen that week—it took nearly three weeks for my powers to come back. Nearly three weeks that I was alone with only my wits to rely on. It was horrible, being alone and so powerless. Really did a number on me. And . . . I don't know why I lost my powers—still, to this day, but I . . ."

I dipped my chin.

"It's not about who you are, but who you can become," I continued. "I was . . . over emotional. And clumsy and bitter and always took my insecurities out on everyone else. I was always so wrapped up in what I thought someone might be thinking of me that I stopped seeing them as people. They became extensions of myself. And I was always striking out to cause even a fraction of the pain that I felt and project it onto someone else. So then, I wouldn't be alone—I was no superhero material."

Rhonda was silent.

I moved my gaze to the walls. The light bloomed across the surface in a paper–thin stream, and as I stared at it, I felt my mind move past it. To a time I didn't like thinking about but wouldn't leave regardless. It was like a second soul, sharing my body. It was something I was always aware was there, even if I didn't talk about it. It was the dirt beneath my nails, the heartbeat in my throat. The unseen smoke in my hair. The cracked glass in my chest. Memories ever present in my head; I kept them there like ghosts.

Even behind my eyelids, I could see them—everything. Clouds of dirt billowing around debris. Cars with smashed windows, tipped onto their side. The road rolled out beneath my feet, filling the streets. And the Mutant, standing so many feet away, with long, vine-like arms, and a vicious set of eyes.

I had my hand out, fingers spread wide, waiting for it—those sparks. That relief.

It was like ripping off a band aid.

But it never came, the relief. The tension only became tighter and a cold feeling ran across the back of my neck. In that moment, I could see myself shattering all over again.

"What did you do then?"

Rhonda's voice pulled me from my thoughts.

I blinked, muscles feeling heavy, and looked up.

"I stopped trying to box myself in so much," I told her and slowly turned back. "I stopped holding onto what I thought were weaknesses. I stopped believing that independence meant loneliness. I stopped pretending I didn't have emotions because, whether I liked it or not, I did and they were apart of me. I lived my life as Helga by shying away from challenges and pretending they didn't affect me—there was no more doing that as Blue Jay," I shifted my weight. "Blue Jay wasn't something that I was, I had to become her."

She stayed silent.

"We can never go back and change our beginnings, but we can rework our stories to save our endings," I continued. "My powers didn't come back because I stopped being afraid but because I could no longer hide from my fears. I'd run out of the room so the only thing I could do was turn around and face everything I had spent too much of my life being afraid of."

I glanced back at her, wanting to see if she was taking it in. Her mouth was still clamped shut, but her eyes were wide. There were millions of words in her gaze; I couldn't read any of them, but I knew that her mind was anything but quiet.

Silence was ringing in my ears, and I shuffled awkwardly. I didn't know what to do; if she was Lila, I knew that I would ask her what she was thinking. But that was difference, I knew Lila. Rhonda and I weren't friends, we had never been—we were too much like fire and ice. Water and oil. Never meshed well together. But in this moment, I felt different, looking at her.

The anger I used to feel had melted away until all that was left was sorrow. It was the most I had ever felt for Rhonda, and I didn't know what to do with it.

But before either of us could say anything else, a screech suddenly barrelled through the entrance. Rhonda grimaced, pulling her legs to her chest, and clapped her hands over her ears.

I merely smiled and tipped my head back. It was a melancholic amusement that moved through me—a sort of ha–ha, of course it wasn't over yet. Why would it be?

I moved to my feet and as I did, my ears rung. The noise pushed everything to the left, so I planted my feet to the ground before taking another step. Gripped my hips, firmer than I should, sucked in a couple of breaths, then moved for the entrance.

"I'll never be that girl again," I said and turned back around to Rhonda. "And neither will you. Nothing will stay the same. Only you can decide what that means."

I lifted my mouth slightly and tilted my face. She was left staring after me as I turned on my heels and ran for the exit, mulling on my words.

---

Sometimes I wondered, had I not gotten my powers back that night, when I had almost lost my and other's lives; had I not somehow managed to conjure enough magic to protect me, would I still be here? If I could no longer project forcefields from my hands, would I be considered worthy? It was always at the back of my head that I had been lucky. I had managed to get my powers back in time before someone else got seriously hurt. But what if I hadn't? Would those same people still be here? Hell, would the city still be here?

I came to a stop in the bustling street, mind still spinning. It was crammed with many shops, roads lined with hot metal cars. People raced for them, scrambling to exit the stores and hurtled into their cars, as screams echoed into the night.

Everything was moving around me, but my ears were still buzzing. Thoughts swarmed like bees. I knew I shouldn't linger on what if's but being around Rhonda had brought these questions back to the surface. What happened with powers like ours, where did they go when we couldn't use them? And what was it that brought them back?

The gravel was vibrating beneath my feet. Everyone was running, faces pale and stretched wide with terror. It made the tingling move down my arms and into my fingers, but the sides of my head already were pounding. It was a bitter reminder—my powers were back, but they weren't progressing. No matter how much I fought, I never seemed to get used to them. I couldn't push myself past the boundaries and I didn't know why. I knew I could do more, but I didn't know how.

Dark shapes moved across the coffee shop windows. I turned my face. Through the glass, I could see tables being thrown and papers flying. The air became sharp. I started running and felt a hammering in my throat. The ground came up to punch the soles of my shoes. For a split second, the knife was in my hands, cold and pressed against my fingers, and then, it was gone. Hurtling. Sending a sharp ringing sound that rolled down my spine.

The knife flew, shooting sharp through the air, before sinking into the closest Mutant. It had been racing after a terrified couple with their child clutched in their hands. The blade hit the Mutant's shoulders and the creature threw up its arms with a cry. It didn't have time to look over its shoulder before its skin burst apart in a roaring blast. A barrier spread over the family, protecting them from the explosion and debris. The little girl's eyes looked up and connected with mine.

It was a question I often asked myself—another warmth collected around my wrist. It buzzed into blue arcs and swinging out my arm, I watched as another forcefield collided into the doors. They burst open and I raced inside—did the Guardian make the superpowers, or did the superpowers make the Guardian?

I came to a stop in the middle of the room. Dozens of eyes whipped in my direction. The room wobbled and spun, becoming a sweltering mess. I cut my gaze right to left, counting—thirteen.

Shit.

Swinging my foot, a forcefield hurtled from my boot and smashed into a Mutant. It roared, letting go of its victim—a woman in a button–down shirt—and flew backwards until it smacked flat against the wall. Another Mutant roared, racing for the woman, and swung. Trembling, the woman covered her face with her arms, preparing for the impact.

But a forcefield engulfed her, springing up until it smacked against the Mutant's fists. It made a bone–crunching sound that made her glance up, eyebrows raising when she saw the glimmering wall that surrounded her.

She then turned and her eyes connected with mine. Her lips parted and her gaze fell to my hand, which was spread out in her direction. The strain was building in my joints. My knees buckled. A wild pulse swelled in my temples and my neck twitched to shake it off.

Grimacing, I swung out my hand. The forcefield lurched up and slammed hard against the Mutant. It was rammed against the wall with a howl.

"Go!" I screamed over its cries. I twirled my wrist and the air around me loosened. The pressure that had been building in my spine dissipated with the last shreds of the barrier, and I almost fell from the relief.

Pressing my lips together, I flung out my arm, sending my knife hurtling for the first Mutant. The woman shakily climbed to her feet, covering her ears as she raced for the doors, and almost fell over when the Mutant exploded.

Spinning on my heels, I sent the knife flying for another Mutant and slammed my foot against an approaching Mutant. Both impacts hit my ears and as I swung back around, I noticed a couple huddled in the corner.

Throwing my hand back, a forcefield curled from behind me. It slithered around, washing over my form, and when the explosion hit, I was propelled forward. My boots made loud screeches across the tiles as I spun on my heels, flinging out my hands, and jumped.

The Mutant turned before I wrapped my legs around its neck. Its howl rumbled against my thigh; squeezing my legs, I twisted my body and rocked my weight to the side. The Mutant's weight was thrown until it was tumbling for the ground. I stretched out my arm, slamming my palm against the ground before I hit the tiles.

The Mutant slammed into the ground as I sprung away on my hands, swinging onto my palms and landing back on my feet. Spinning around on my heels, I swung my hand and felt the knife swish over my shoulder until it had slammed into the Mutant's neck.

Then, raising my hand again, I flung the blade to the right. A Mutant exploded when it sunk into its torso. I rolled away then landed on my knees, palm pressed to the ground. A barrier glimmered around me, dappling with light, as hot air rushed to swallow me whole.

Sucking in a breath, I turned my attention back to the couple.

"Go!" I told them. "I got you!"

Nodding, they scrambled to their feet. Glass crunched beneath their feet as they raced across the debris, weaving around the Mutants to the door. I watched them, heart in my throat. I wanted to make sure that they were safe the whole way but didn't realise the light around me changing.

Something slammed into my side, sending me flying. My heart fell into my throat, crashing with my teeth, until something crunched into the back of my head. Glass was everywhere, hurtling over me. I could feel tiny shards nicking into my uniform, moving through my strands to my neck. But then something rose up, smacking me hard in the stomach. It was a cold impact that clapped against me and made the world spin. There was a nauseous twist in my chest, making it hard to even picture myself getting up.

Glass came down, I kept my face pressed to the ground. There were still shards tangled in my braid and sitting in the neck of my suit. I clamped my lips together, hoping nothing rose from my throat.

Beneath the burning in my ears, footsteps approached.

My eyes opened. I looked up.

A Mutant towered over me. Or two, I couldn't tell. It was like my sight had been punched too far back, and now everything was spinning around. Things were moving, I was seeing double. I couldn't tell what was real and what was nausea. I hissed, rubbing my temple. That knock Rhonda had given me to the side of my face was really biting me in the ass right now. I wondered how long I would be having vision troubles until my Guardian abilities kicked in and healed everything.

The window behind the Mutant was completely smashed. That must have been what it had thrown me through. The creature took another step—one that sent trembles across the ground, rocking against the bones—and pulled its lips back with a snarl.

"Okay. Now—" I pushed against the ground, coughing. "Now you've pissed me off."

I punched the air and a wire flew out and wrapped tight around the Mutant's ankle. Gritting my teeth, I twisted around on my waist and launched the Mutant against the wall. There was a thud that made blood rush in my ears. The wire snapped back into my wrist and as I twisted my hand, I felt the knife fly into the Mutant.

Swinging onto my feet, I marched back into the café, feeling the knife flying back into my fingers.

All Mutant attention focused back onto me.

"Eight more," I told myself.

A Mutant turned, spinning on its feet, and raced in my direction. A warmth tingled in my bones, pushing up until it was collecting in the centre of my chest. I moved forward, twirling the light around in my hands. Shadows shifted. I knocked my fist into the Mutant and swung up in an uppercut. Its face snapped backwards. I couldn't feel anything in my hands, but a dull pulse curled in my chin.

The knife flew back into my fingers and lifting the blade, I sent it through the Mutant's shoulder, grimacing at the squelching noise. The Mutant howled when I ripped the blade out. Blood splattered across the floors and onto my shoes.

Spinning on the balls of my feet, I flung out my wire and kicked off from the ground. I swooped over the tables and across the room, smashing my feet into another Mutant. I felt it falling backwards. Twisting my wrist, the knife followed my movements and rammed into the Mutant's torso. Slapping my palms onto the table, I swung across the surface and landed on the other side.

Air billowed across my face and my braid slapped against my neck. Spinning around, I felt the knife flying before landing in another Mutant. The forcefield tingled in my wrists before I raised my hands, and magic burst in all directions. It stretched, locking me in a cerulean cage. Sparks fell across the ground. The explosion slammed into the barrier, knocking me backwards, and the table sharply rammed into my side. I groaned but kept my hands up. There was a pounding that shook my bones, made my knees shake, and I looked down to the ground.

The barrier's light pushed onto the tiles. Waves rolled across the ground, running against my shoes in fluidic motions. There was a dull pain in my waist but when the air had cleared, the barrier collapsed and I fell forward onto my knees, trying to catch my breath.

The side of my neck were warm, flushed from the pulse that kept racing strong enough it felt like it would tear apart my skin. I placed a hand to my throat for a minute, swallowing to wet my dry throat then pressed my fingers back to my side.

There was another growl and when I looked up, another Mutant was racing at me. I huffed than swung my wire so it wrapped around the Mutant's wrist. The creature paused and, locking my knees, I heaved. The Mutant slipped with a wild noise before it crashed into another Mutant and they both smacked into the ground.

The wire snapped into my wrist and with a wild motion, my knife had flown straight through one and then the other Mutant. Something darted from my peripherals and looking to my right, two Mutants were clambering up the stairs.

Footsteps echoed in my head as I swung across the table and raced after them. The closer Mutant heard me and spun around, hissing. Heart in my throat, I swung. The Mutant ducked to the side then swiped upwards, grabbing onto my neck. Its claws closed around my windpipe and violently swung me downwards. I threw out my hands to prevent my face from smashing into the steps. The hand left my neck, but a foot slammed against my temple, and the floor left my body.

Chilled air burned my face, turning my surroundings into rushing shapes, until I slammed against the wall. I coughed, the air refusing to go back into my chest, and slid back to the ground. My hands trembled as the world pressed to my head like clouds.

I could hear clambering. I looked up to the Mutants racing out the door at the top of the stairs. I sighed. The exhaustion was collapsing like bricks in my chest and spots crawled from the corners of my vision. I shook my face then forced myself from the ground. Flinging out a wire, it caught onto the hook above the door. Kicking off from the wall, I swung through the air and over the steps, pushing my feet together so they slammed the door open.

I sailed inside, hooking my feet together, and spinning until I had landed safely on the ground.

The air rolled past me cold. Streetlights pushed in through the window and draped dark shadows across the wall. The Mutants spun in my direction, making disgruntled sounds. One swung and I ducked beneath its fist, slamming my foot into the other Mutant's leg. It cried out and held onto its shin, and when I swung around, the first Mutant was racing for me.

I reared to the side. The Mutant whooshed past me and crashed into the other one. I swung my hand. The magic buzzed; the knife soared until it had pierced the first Mutant.

Immediately, I whipped out my hand. There was a cool pulsing from the corners of my eyes before it billowed out into a light. It formed around me, cackling in my ears, seconds before the explosion cracked down. It swung into the barrier and flung the second Mutant until it was against the window.

Silence hung like a dead weight, and the pulse in my neck spiked. I twisted my wrist, watching as the forcefield disappeared and the cold settled over me like smoke. The light outside flickered, and the Mutant's shadow fell over me.

I twirled on the balls of my feet, twisted my face, and then ran.

It all happened so fast; one minute, I was running and the next, my knee had come up into the back of its shoulder, and we were both outside. The force propelled the Mutant through the window and as glass flew everywhere, I landed on the gathering of the neighbouring roof. The wind lapped across the back of my neck and a warmth tangled between my brows as I summoned my knife. Swinging my hand in the direction of the falling Mutant, the blade hit it before it even made it to the ground.

I came to a stop, heels rocking against the platform, and sucked in a breath. Strands moved against the sides of my face. I raised my hand and the blade flew back into my fingers. The explosion billowed, spiralling up between the walls until it burst out into a large plume. It fanned across my face and swished my hair across my eyes and down my neck.

I wanted to dip my head back and shut my eyes. It was much cooler out here and given how much I had been rushing around just then, it felt good. I wanted the cool breeze to swoop past my ears and lift the hair from my shoulders, curling around my neck.

There was a warmth in my joints that moved down my limbs and flourished in my chest. It turned the pounding in my ribs into a gentle beating that melted the fatigue into a golden haze.

Moving the strands from my face, I released another breath and turned my attention back to the city. Havoc was still being wrecked; I could see people racing across the street, ducking beneath Mutants swinging their way, and hiding behind benches.

I ran.

The wind flattened my brow. It carried the smell of dust and smoke, tangling in a ball in my throat that almost had me hacking.

My heart tilted when I neared the edge of the roof but didn't stop. Tightening my hold on my knife, I leapt, twisting my body so I could send the blade into a nearing Mutant's head. I couldn't see the collusion, but I heard it like a punch to the throat. Hitting the air, I threw out my wires and swung around, slamming my knee up until it hit a Mutant's jaw.

It howled and I flipped, landing on my feet. The knife was back in my hand in seconds and swinging on my heels, I plunged the blade into the Mutant's chest. The skin came apart and its blood hit my cheek. I went to swing my wires again when I noticed something to the left. Turning my head, I realised it was a teenage boy, standing far too close for my liking.

Pressing my lips together, I swerved in his direction and scooped him into my arms. There was a small "Oof!" as his nose bounced against my throat. I swung my wire and kicked off the ground, soaring into an alleyway.

"Are you alright?" I asked when I let him down from my arms.

He blinked, eyes rushing around in different directions, but didn't answer. I was about to repeat my question when it occurred to me that it was probably just hitting him what had just happened. I forgot that I moved way faster in this form; time was different. What seemed like minutes to me, could be seconds for others.

"Um, yes, I—" he stopped when he looked over my shoulder.

My blood turned to ice, and I swung around. A Mutant landed with a thunk! on the other end of the alleyway. Dirt spiralled and empty bottles rolled from its feet. The boy yelped and I quickly swept him backwards before turning around again. I could already feel the makings of a forcefield gathering, vibrating in a series of pulses that rattled the air and made it dewy. Sprinting forward, I kicked off from the ground into a leap.

Swinging out my arms, the barrier fanned out and smacked into the Mutant. The creature was sent backwards, and I flipped back onto the ground. Spinning on the balls of my feet, my knife hurtled for the Mutant. And throwing out my arms again, another barrier spread until it was pressed against both walls. The explosion flared and pressed to the barrier, but digging my feet against the ground, we stayed untouched.

I let a few seconds hang for a moment, not saying anything. Just listening. Waiting for something else. But when nothing attacked, I let the forcefield fade. Night air soaked my temples. Everything swerved, pushing together than stretching, and I pressed myself against the wall.

Tension rolled down my body and my muscles swelled against my skin.

"You alright?" I asked.

My voice rang, dry and cracked. There wasn't a response and for a moment, I thought that he hadn't heard me. But when I looked, he was already nodding.

"Good," I said then pushed off from the wall.

The ground didn't feel firm beneath my feet. I moved around him anyway, holding up my arm to catch the knife over my shoulder, and peered around the wall. Nothing was coming at me right away, so I added over my shoulder, "Stay hidden."

I could feel his eyes burning into my back. Their inquisitive gaze. I wondered what it was that they saw—what it was that anyone saw when I was like this.

I leapt up onto the hood of a parked car and grimaced when the metal groaned beneath my feet. Glancing up, I expected to find another Mutant but there weren't any.

It made me frown and look around, searching for any disturbances or scared faces or lingering shadows. But all I could see were more people, covered in debris. Some were helping one another but most looked around, seemingly as confused as I was.

Leaping from the car, I stepped out onto the road and pressed a hand to my side. It was throbbing, I realised. I hadn't noticed with all the running around and taking down Mutants twice my size. But now that everything had seemingly stopped, the pain I had pushed back was catching up with me.

Rhonda had really gotten a good knock at it.

My chest twisted. I hadn't stopped long enough for any of what she had said to settle in. But now that I had, I didn't know what I was supposed to think. I wanted to still be angry at her, but I couldn't. I would be lying to myself if I said I was. The rage had run out, softening into a more relenting sort of feeling. It would be easy to hate her and continue blaming her for getting Lila hurt, but I couldn't. I knew exactly what she was feeling.

Suddenly, there was a loud screech from the other end of the street. Footfalls that were heavy and loud echoed against the cement and when I looked, I realised how large this Mutant was.

It passed the buildings in a rush, skittering in my direction, and its head glazed the second storeys. Light rolled down its skin like it was made from scales. The mutant didn't have eyes, but it had slits for a nose, a large crescent mouth, and sharp ears. A chill crept beneath my skin. The pulse rushed back in my throat, and I wrapped my fingers around my knife when Rhonda's words suddenly rang in my mind. This Mutant was large, large enough that the explosion would be disastrous. And who knew how much damage that would cause to the buildings and by extension, the people.

"Let's go for a ride, big guy."

I threw my wire and kicked off to swing into the air. The wind hurled into my ears as my stomach shot into my stomach. The Mutant skidded to a stop and reached out for me, but I twisted my body to weave over its fingers. It roared but I didn't look back. I could hear its uneven stomps follow me and the screeching of metals against pavement as the cars were shoved across the street.

I winced, hoping everyone had the sense to get away from them before they were thrown, and reminded myself it could become worse if I stayed in one spot.

Kicking off from a window, I broke out of the main street and with a random turn, I heaved up higher into the air. Starlight twirled around me, softly pulsing against my neck. The colour was pale and the night thinned; I pulled my arm back and felt my wire spin around me in a large, elegant loop. I raised my chin, feeling my hair swirl against my ears, and scanned the area, looking for somewhere deserted to fight.

My eyes caught onto a dark alleyway, nestled at the intersection of a street. Perfect. I swung my wrist when something suddenly came down on me.

It was a searing pain that slammed into my skull. The world was jerked to the right as I was thrown off course before darkness took over my vision. It felt like my stomach had flown up and settled between my ears, and my breath had been jerked from my chest. The air turned to razors and all I could hear was howling. Then, the ground came up and slammed into my shoulder. The crack was all I could hear, and my screams were swallowed as I knocked again and again and again, rolling across the dirt until I had landed on my stomach.

The night swirled and twisted, I didn't know where the air ended and the ground begun. Sounds pushed in and out, in and out. There was a wobbling sensation in my chest that threatened to push out into my mouth. The air stung my skin. A hot pain swelled in my shoulder. I wanted to clap a hand over it, but every part of me ached, I didn't want to move.

Sounds hovered behind me. No, not behind, around. Angry sounds—roars. Growing louder and louder.

I tried looking but everything was swerving. I blinked, again and again, trying to regain my focus. Heat spread across my nose and between my brows. Something was tilting in my chest, it made me want to hurl. I clamped my mouth shut to hold it back.

I looked around, sight going in and out. Everything around me thundered. I blinked. There was still a pulse that pounded in my temples, but I think I could see where I was. It was a parking lot, outside a store I couldn't recognise.

It was abandoned though. And wide.

And, I shivered, surrounded by Mutants.

There were seven—no, eight, I think. Grey silhouettes with glowing, malicious eyes, but all of them were tall. Not like the one that had chased me, but far larger than an average person.

Lowering my attention to the gravel, I saw the tiny splatters of blood. My fingers rushed to my nose. Something dripped down and around my mouth. I tried wiping it away. But something was leaking down the side of my forehead, tangling with my hair and running over my brow. Everything became blurry for a minute. The ground shifted to the right, and I pressed my palm against the gravel to keep from tumbling over.

Shit.

I had to make this quick, I decided, lifting my eyes as the Mutants approached from all angles.

I moved to my feet, trying to collect my bearings, and almost slipped. My knees were trembling. I'd already fought so many Mutants and I had literally been thrown to the ground, I'd have to cut the theatrics and go for the kill.

Holding up my hand, I waited for my knife but felt my heart stop when seconds passed and nothing happened. Nothing appeared in my hand. I didn't even feel that warm tug that meant the knife was nearby. I looked to my side then around, searching for where it could be, but didn't see anything. The last I had had it, I'd been flying so who knows where it was right now.

Shit, shit, shit—

I kept my hand out, hoping it could maybe get to me anyway but there was a rustle and when I looked up, two Mutants were charging. I hissed in frustration then ducked beneath their fists, spinning on the balls of my feet, and slammed my foot into its back. It sent the Mutant to its knees, then turning to the second, I shot out my wire. It went through its torso and, locking my knees, I swung the creature around. It slammed into another approaching Mutant, and both creatures were knocked to the ground.

I swung out my wire which wrapped around a Mutant's wrist. Scrunching my face, I swung on my heels and tugged it towards me. The Mutant howled, losing its footing, and stumbled in my direction. Jumping from the dirt, I swung my foot against its neck and pushed off into the sky, swinging out my hand.

Then, the pulse came rushing back, sinking deep into my ears. My blade—wherever it was—it was nearing. But then I heard a whistling and when I turned my head, a dark shape slammed into my face.

It swept me backwards. My heart shot into my throat and my tongue jerked against my teeth. The ground slammed into me but before I could even blink, several hands had latched onto me.

I was forced to my knees. Blood slipped between my teeth. I choked. The breeze became a mist, warm and stuffy. I could barely breathe. Black was swimming over my eyes, I couldn't tell up from right. Something bashed into my face. Pain exploded in my jaw. Skin broke beneath the pressure and blood shot out as everything sloshed to the side. And then, there was a fierce jab in my stomach that sent electrifying jolts across my bones.

My knees buckled before hitting the ground. Everything tilted and the air thickened, but before I could fall, I was yanked by the strands of my hair. I screamed. Needles jabbed into my flesh, pulling tears from my eyes, and the sky panted and screamed. Something was crushing my shoulder. Pain radiated thick, making everything cloudy, and I realised a hand had wrapped around the shoulder I had landed on.

My head was pulled backwards and my chin locked with the sky. I blinked through the tears, trying to make out the dark face lingering above mine. But everything was so muddled; dark trees swirled into black knots. My insides stirred, pushing against one another until bile hit the back of my teeth. I clenched my mouth and pressed a hand to the claws that held me up. But another hand struck away my fingers and pulled my arm to the side.

I cried out and laughter sounded around me. Blinking against the blurriness, I saw the Mutant in front of me grinning. I tried wiggling out of the grip, but it was firm, and something swung into my side. A hot ache lanced my torso and I coughed, slumping to the side, but was abruptly jerked upright again.

I wanted to fight back, but exhaustion was sinking in. Everything felt warm and sleepy. The air was like towels pressed against my skin as sweaty sheets slid down my temples, sinking into the dips in my neck. I tried raising my eyes back to the Mutants when a feeling hit me. Everything turned into a flash; the light on my neck became hot. Everything burned. Heat crawled into my ears and my chest began blistering from the lack of oxygen.

And then, my heart dropped.

The intense heat turned to ice and I sank into a nausea that made everything soft.

Opening my eyes, a bile–toned yellow filled my vision. It pushed and swam, shielding my face from the evening light. Dancing across my eyes like painted glass. The more it soared, the deeper my chest sank. It felt like I was being pulled in two different directions and all I wanted was to slip further into oblivion.

But then, suddenly, I was yanked into another direction. The ground left my knees and the hands around me disappeared. For a moment, I was soaring. But I couldn't see—everything was too quick. So, when the ground came back up, I couldn't put my hands up to protect myself. It smacked into my nose and my teeth sunk into my tongue. Hot copper burst across my lips. Dirt piled over me and pinned my hair to the back of my neck.

I lay there for a moment—or maybe it was an hour. I couldn't tell. Everything was swirling too much. I wanted to lift my wrists or my face, but it was like something was holding me down. Bile crawled back up to my throat. The air had lost its sharpness. I spat the blood from my teeth. A small part of me registered that there was red salvia across my fingers, but most of my attention went to my spinning surroundings.

Then, the sounds rushed back in. There were footsteps rushing in different directions and howls. And I realised how cold the gravel felt, pressed against my skin. The world was a mass of colours and each tone weighed against me. I wanted to get up, but it was still too heavy.

Then, a shadow passed over me.

I lifted my head, blinking blearily, and turned in its direction.

The Mutant from before—the large one without eyes—towered over me. Its lips pulled back to reveal a wet and jagged looking mouth.

"Shit," I murmured to myself.

It wrenched its fist over its shoulder. I wanted to raise my arms but my head swam. Everything was so hazy and cloudy. The dirt was cold beneath my skin. The air had thickened into water and each wave kept me down. The scent of blood burned my nose, I could feel it spilling from the corner of my lips.

I squeezed my eyes shut.

Heat swished past me but nothing else. A fist didn't smack into my face and the ground didn't rise up back into me.

I felt nothing.

My ears rung. I waited. But nothing came. So, I opened my eyes.

And gasped.

A figure stood inches from me.

She was a mass of shadows. Streetlights inhaled her and produced a broad image that fell over me like a cold breath. She had her back to me, but from the way the light ate her curves, I knew that it was a woman. The light washed hot over her copper skin, and her hair slipped past her. The balls of her feet were snug in the dirt, knees twisted, and her shoulder had dipped.

Tracing along her arm, I understood why.

She was holding the Mutant back.

She was less than the Mutant's height. Her head couldn't even graze its waist. Yet somehow, she had knocked its fist backwards. Her fist was pressed against its skin and peeking further, I saw a glint between them. Her blade was out and had pierced the Mutant, and the collusion had caused a sharp slap.

Her hair fell around her shoulder. I couldn't see her face, but I knew that she was smirking.

"Rhonda?"

She didn't look at me, but her shoulders tensed. Her back straightened and I saw the faintest shift in her face. Her chin moved an inch over her shoulder. But she stopped herself and turned back to the Mutant. It was almost comedic, how it towered over her. If the situation wasn't so dire, I would've laughed (something I imagined she'd called me a hypocrite for. She was still taller than me, even in this form). But somehow, she was holding her own.

Digging her heels into the dirt, she pushed against the fist and threw the Mutant off its balance. And then, she released a cry and slammed her foot against its chest.

There was an echoing thud! from the collusion. The Mutant flew backwards, skidding past and diving across the gravel. The ground shuddered and tiny rocks flew up across the surrounding creatures.

The explosion was a crash, hitting the trees with a crack of noise, and lighting the space with cold flashes. The sudden light collided with the night air and sharp shadows formed across the ground. I heard Rhonda suck in a breath than turn around; her eyes crashed into mine.

The heat rose from behind her, soft but warm. She looked like she was standing in gold. Shadows twisted around her arms, emphasizing the dips and rises in her biceps, and her hair fanned out around her shoulders.

She kept her lips pressed together. Looking at her, I could feel my mouth dropping. There was something different about her. It was in how she carried herself, it seemed different from the last time we had seen each other. Hell, it seemed different from the entire time I had known her. Her gaze seemed steadier. Steely. But it was as warm as it was strong. I lowered my gaze and noticed the small crater that had formed around her. Like she had landed on the ground with such ferocity that the dirt had been swept outwards.

I turned my eyes back to her. "What are you—"

There was another thud! and when we looked, a larger Mutant had landed. Its landing sent waves of dirt scattering. The air was still sultry, but it was cooling and the lights pushed over from the left.

"No time," Rhonda swung her hand down to my face. I grabbed it and pulled myself up to her side. My knees were still wobbly, and my breaths moved like nails on a chalkboard. There was a sting that I felt to my toes when I tried wiping away the blood from my face. I released a small noise I hoped Rhonda couldn't hear and pressed a hand to my side.

I felt like I had been hit by a car. It was a searing pain that crushed and burned; it hurt to move my joints. My mouth was very quickly filling with blood but pressing my tongue to the roof of my mouth sent another stinging wave down to my knees. I pressed my palm further into my side, mentally groaning. I had really done it this time.

"This one looks like its about to blow its casket," Rhonda added.

I looked up and actually did groan this time. Yeah, she wasn't kidding. I don't know if it was because of the lights pushing shadows much further than before. Or if it was the Mutants slowly crawling out from around it, baring their teeth like wild animals. Or if it was the way the dark seemed to make their eyes glow. But there was something way more ferocious about this Mutant than the others.

The Mutant than wailed, a noise that reached the ends of the lot.

"Too late," she murmured.

I clenched my fists. The action sent jolts from my fingers to my elbows. The trees moved around me, and the air had thickened into smoke. Smoke that moved out in tendrils, latching onto anything it could so it could drag it under. I felt my stomach move up into my throat and a stickiness soak my collar.

I was exhausted.

I dipped my chin and sucked in a small breath. My fingers were shaking. Or maybe, it was my vision that wouldn't stop jumping. I blinked. Tremors moved down my knuckles. A heartbeat echoed in my throat.

Swallowing, I peeked at Rhonda from my peripherals. She was glaring at the Mutant like it had personally wronged her. Shadows curved beneath her cheekbones. Her chin had dipped and muscles shifted in her jaw. She was pissed—for what, I didn't know. But she was angrier than I had seen her all day.

I was glad to have her on my side this time—especially after what had just happened. But it made me wonder where this had come from. There wasn't a flicker of hesitation in how she stood. She wasn't curling in on herself, trying to hide, or even second guessing herself. It was a complete 360° from where I had left her almost an hour ago.

Turning back to the Mutant, I touched my forehead and scraped my hair back. The exhaustion was a soft fog settling between my eyes. I shook my face and shifted my focus for any remaining energy that I had.

It made my vision surge, but I could feel blue lights around my fingers.

The Mutant moved forward, dropping its jaw and releasing a hot blast of fire from its teeth. The flames churned, twisting into a column, and swept across the parking lot in our direction. Blue sparks skittered across the ground as I waved my fists around, and a cool blue tide wound from my fingers. It stretched out into a barrier that encased us. I could feel the vibrating, hear the buzzing in my ears, and felt my bones shake with it.

The fire crashed into the barrier in a thunderous boom that almost swept me from my feet. I would've fallen had Rhonda's hands not appeared around my elbows and kept me standing. Her gaze was on me, but I couldn't look at her. Not with how everything was still moving. I shook my face and dug my feet back into the dirt. Particles scattered across my boots.

I moved forward, keeping my eyes pressed to the barrier. The air scattered across my face, swiping back my hair, and a moistness soaked my cheeks. There was a beating in my stomach, like someone was hitting me. A dryness scratched at my throat. I swallowed and pretended it wasn't there.

Fire poured over my forcefield. It made everything flare and it suddenly felt like the weight of the whole world was pressing down on me. Pressure was building in my arms. I bent my knees and dipped my chin. Normally, I could hold on but after everything that had happened, I could feel the impact hitting me much harder. The barrier flickered around us and a pounding sensation pulsated in my temples. Sweat dripped from my temples, sliding across my face, and hung from my jaw.

I ducked my face, scrunching my expression. I needed to keep going, I needed to keep—

My eyes snapped upwards when I heard footsteps.

I blinked.

Rhonda had stepped in front of me. Her shadow hung dark and loose and for a moment, I was so surprised, I didn't feel the shifting beneath my feet. Light bent around her, electric fields of blue flashing brightly. I couldn't see her face, but there wasn't an ounce of hesitation. One moment, she was standing with her back to me, and the next—

I frowned. "Rhonda, what ar—"

—she was stepping into the light.

I froze.

Rhonda passed through the forcefield like it was air and the fire swallowed her whole. Panic clawed its way up my throat and the barrier almost disappeared. I stretched out my hand to reach for her when the smearing heat crashed over me. I pushed my hands out again, forcing the barrier back up. It felt like someone had wrapped a hand around my chest as I raised my eyes to search for her again.

The heat poured out in a fiery blast. It splashed around her, twisting brightly like thousands of warm–coloured thread. The heat turned everything to shimmers, the scorching rays making everything dance. The air had thickened until it hurt to breathe. Dirt was flung from the ground. Grass singed into dust.

But everything moved past her.

The hazy glow from the fires surrounded her face and shoulders. The hallowed haze cast her in shadows, lining her in rows of gold that reminded me of sequined teeth. And her hair was like smouldering coal, swishing past her shoulders in small coils. I felt boxed in watching her and it suddenly dawned on me how very trapped I was. Heat was already seeping in. I could feel it drying the water from my eyes and turning the blood on my face into a thick crust. I shuffled my weight. It wasn't Rhonda that needed saving but me, and that made me very anxious.

Rhonda stopped.

I kept my arms up, watching. She bent her knees for a moment than leapt up from the ground. Gravel cracked beneath her weight, and she disappeared into the flames.

My jaw dropped and I frantically looked for her. But all I saw were rippling walls of heat, flashing against my barrier and forcing me backwards. The air stung and I blinked against it. But it felt like the ground was moving closer and closer towards my knees. There was a strain in my hands. Everything was swerving like someone had taken the earth and tilted it to the side. Suddenly, all I could focus on was the dirt. Screams blasted in my ears and a ringing pressed into my head.

I wasn't aware that I had fallen until the gravel had pressed to the sides of my face. It was cold, biting into my skin and nicking it open. Everything was spinning, and it made my stomach roll until it was pressed to the back of my teeth.

But I didn't feel fire. The barriers had come down, I could feel them. Fire should be pouring over me and burning my skin, but I felt fine. I didn't even feel the heat anymore. The air felt clear. My lungs opened up to take in as much as possible, and I felt it pour like water inside of me.

Chilled air seeped through my skin, and I suddenly realised how badly I had been sweating. Dirt stuck to me, and wild hairs curled against the sides of my face. As the breath went in and out, my ears rang. My head swam. I opened my eyes—which I hadn't even realised had shut—and lifted my chin. The night sky filled my vision, ashen greys basking in the frigid air. It felt closer than it should be, like the sky was lowering itself so the stars could press damp kisses along my cheeks.

I sucked in another breath and released, watching as the dirt flew out, and tried to make everything stop spinning. Something twisted in my chest. It was nauseating and I clamped my lips together. Resting my head back against the ground, I sucked in a few more breaths, allowing everything to calm for a moment. It felt like a hammer was beating inside my head, making everything fuzzy, and pushing the sounds back so all my ears could detect were my own laboured breaths. There was a tingling sensation before more copper crawled across my tongue. The breeze swooped and a stinging pressed to my cheek. I rose a hand to brush away the gravel and felt tiny prickles of blood smearing across my cheekbones.

But beneath the pounding came a new sound—a clanging.

My head snapped up.

Smoke still clogged the air but through it, I made out Rhonda's figure.

She was surrounded by Mutants attacking her with fierce jabs, but she evaded each one. Lowering her stance, she slammed her fist into an uppercut that smashed into a Mutant's jaw. Its teeth slammed together and, spinning on her feet, she sunk her hand into its gut. The Mutant folded, hacking up its lungs before she grabbed its neck and flung the Mutant over her shoulder.

She then spun around to another Mutant.

I looked over to the others, counting three.

She needed help.

I pushed against the dirt and heaved myself onto my feet. The ground wobbled and the air thickened, but I dug my feet into the gravel. I could feel the blood moving down my cheek and wiped it away. Cloudiness came at me from all sides but as it closed in, I stretched out my palm. Focused my energy between the clouds and narrowed it to a single point. Everything was swept up like waves until my vision had formed a tunnel that led me to one thing.

A ringing burned my ears.

My lips twitched and I dug my heels into the ground, preparing for it, when a silver flash swished out from the leaves.

It was in my hands in seconds and, swishing around, I sent it flying. The blade speared through a Mutant's arm and the creature cried out in surprise.

Spinning around, my eyes went to the closest Mutant. My mouth curled to the side and I charged in its direction. The floor threatened to come up and latch onto my clothes. Shadows pressed to the corners of my eyes. I shook my face and pressed on.

The Mutant looked up a second too late.

I spun and felt a fist swing above my head. I swiped out my leg and caught the back of its knees. The Mutant tumbled with a startled cry.

My eyes then caught movement from my peripherals, and when I looked, I saw another Mutant sneaking up on Rhonda. She was much too focused on fighting the larger Mutant to notice. I pressed my lips together, letting out a breath through my nose, and rose a hand. Warmth crawled to the front of my brain. I swung my palm down and the knife sharply swerved for the Mutant below me and sunk into its flesh.

I kicked off and raced in the Mutants' direction as I heard the last of its howls.

The ground knocked hard into my feet as I ran. It smacked my knees together. But I didn't stop. The Mutant turned in my direction. My lips pulled back and I leapt forward, pressing my feet against its chest. Chilled air clawed at my eyes when I kicked off, using the momentum to swing myself into a backflip, and shakily landed on my feet.

The night wobbled and spun when a whistling caught my attention. I held up my hand, catching the blade, and swung it around my fingers.

The Mutant had been knocked backwards, but because of its stockiness, it hadn't been thrown to the ground. I crouched slightly, glowering. The Mutant growled, eyes sharpening, and charged for me.

I ducked beneath its arm, slinging the blade into its flesh. Hair slammed against my chin. I tilted my face back when the Mutant howled, then rolled away on my knees. I landed a few feet away in a crouch. Magic was already buzzing inside me, pushing against my skin, so with a gesture, I released it.

Electric blue burst from all around and collected in a bright globe. The explosion sent showers of sparks and dirt billowing up against the field. The air sunk deep into my pores and made my head spin. An uncomfortable nausea churned in my stomach, sinking lower and lower, and as it did, the ground trembled.

I placed a hand to my mouth when I heard a crashing noise.

I lifted my gaze.

A dark shape flew across the ground, landing in the dirt, and skidded until it was knocked against the bottom of a tree. Light rolled over it, forcing the shadows back, and revealed that it was Rhonda.

My heart dropped.

Her body was spread against the tree. Elbows hooked over the roots, her hair fell over her face. Her chest rose and fell, heavy. She leaned her head back, chin tipping upwards, and the light climbed higher. Her skin shimmered, dewy with wetness, and a small slither of blood dipped down her cheek. Even from here, I could see bruises were already forming.

She was exhausted.

Pressing my lips together, the blade snapped into my hand, and I moved towards them.

"Hang on—"

"No!"

I stopped, confused.

Rhonda held a dirty hand up.

"I can do this!" she said, eyes wide.

I frowned. "Wha—"

"Just trust me!"

I stared, unsure. She was injured and this was her first real fight. This morning she had mostly stayed on the sidelines and she had had Lila with her. This was her first time actually going solo and she was clearly already tiring out. Why didn't she want my help?

But then, I saw her eyes. Something hot was in her gaze.

Immediately, I understood.

She needed to prove this to herself. This morning had been recent but likely for her, it felt like it had happened minutes ago. She needed to undo the spell and prove that she deserved this. That it wasn't all a mistake.

She needed to become a Guardian.

Reluctantly, I stepped backwards and nodded.

Something shifted in her gaze. Her lips curved. And then, she turned her attention back to the Mutant. It roared and leapt wildly into the air, landing inches from her. The impact sent dirt hurtling through her hair and she stumbled back against the tree. Holding a hand to her eyes, she rose her gaze again. Her chest rose and fell. The intense look on her face was a storm; a crude slap to the face. Her anger moved through her, rolling up her body in waves, and simmered through her gaze.

Something in her was brewing and it was strong.

The Mutant lunged, swinging a fist bigger than my thigh. But she didn't move. Instead, she clenched her teeth, scrunching her face, then let out a roar. It was a sound that came from her stomach, somewhere deep within her soul. It barrelled through the space and filled the air with her ferocity. She then moved forward, squeezing her hands into fists, and jabbed her arm forward. I thought she was going to smash her fist against the Mutant's, but than noticed silver flash from her wrist.

The light slammed against the blade before she reared her hand back, then sent her knife into the Mutant's wrist. The Mutant froze as the realisation dawned on it, then slid its gaze down to her.

Blood dripped between her knuckles. Rhonda's face didn't change.

Shadows twisted in her hair. Her skin shone like jewels from the dampness. Her jaw clenched as her lips pulled back. And her eyebrows had pushed together as her chest came up and down.

She glowered at the creature. Her expression didn't twitch—she stared up into its eyes without regret. The Mutant roared and swung its other fist. She dodged its blow than swung up until her other blade had buried deep into its wrist. The impact had wind spiralling over her, whipping her hair around her face and shoulders. She rose to her knees, dirt sliding down her pants, as the Mutant's arms helplessly followed like a puppet being dragged on strings.

The Mutant screamed, a cracked and loud exclamation that came over me like a clap of thunder. The Mutant dived its head down towards Rhonda, hoping to get one last knock in before it exploded. Rhonda twisted both her fists, contorting the Mutant's wrists, until there were disgusting snapping sounds.

Bile rose and I clamped my hand over my lips.

Rhonda's expression stayed still, eyes challenging the Mutant that towered over her.

Light than burst from the creature's skin. I swung an arm over my eyes and twisted my torso away when a forcefield materialised around me. The air stopped and rained in cold shades that made chills run down my arms. But as the energy surging around me brightened, thickening into a wall, my head spun. Everything became hazy and the air lurched, Then, it was like all of my body heat had rushed down to my feet, and the ground came up to slap into my knees.

I slammed my hands out before I hit the ground. The gravel was sharp against my skin. My breath became shaky. I couldn't tell up from down. My spine trembled. The drain was catching up to me, I thought, feeling my ears becoming hot. I either needed food or a lot of rest.

I pressed my fist to my mouth, marvelling at how hot my skin had gotten, and narrowed my focus onto the ground. Breathing in and out, slow and deep. I needed to get through this so I could make sure Rhonda was alright.

Heat was closing in on me, pressing against the sides of my face and burning my ears. But the light eventually shimmered, and shadows collapsed around me. I rose my chin. Air sloshed beneath my jaw and I shut my eyes, appreciating how cold it felt on my skin. The ground was still rocking back and forth, but at a steadier pace now. Nausea swung in my throat and I pressed my lips together, opening my eyes.

The forcefield flickered before dissipating. The air was cold and crisp. It crashed over me and I shivered. I sucked in another breath but bent forward hacking when something burning flooded to the back of my throat. I spat it onto my hand and quietly groaned. Things were still spinning, but I could see the red splattered across my thumb and knuckles.

Right.

I pressed a hand to my nose than forehead, trying to mop up the blood. But it was pointless. My nose in particular was pretty nasty. It would heal but not for a while. I held onto the bridge, and squeezed my eyes shut when reflex tears burned my gaze from the pain. At least there was one silver lining to the suspension, I guess. It would take much more than a good night's rest for this to heal, even with Guardian powers.

Rolling my shoulders, I forced myself onto my feet, and looked for Rhonda. But everything seemed so thick and murky. Grey had spread across the space in a dark haze.

I couldn't see Rhonda.

I felt my heart in my throat. My hands were shaking. I clenched them into fists and moved forward. Where was she? She had been right against the Mutant when it had exploded, but it shouldn't have injured her. Not seriously. The Mutant was large, but the explosions shouldn't be enough to seriously damage us—at least in this state. And even if was, she had her powers. She could just phase through, right?

But then, a dark figure suddenly appeared. It was thin with thick shoulders. Dirt crunched as it marched in my direction. I didn't move. The fog parted and light slid across their face.

I breathed a relieved sigh.

Rhonda.

She had her hand pressed to her side. Her shoulders were dirty and her uniform dishevelled. But she was still standing. Her eyes were on mine. The steeliness in her gaze had since melted. There was an awkwardness to how she moved now, like everything had caught up with her, and she didn't know how to react. Or maybe, she didn't know how to act now that it was the two of us.

I waited for it to hit me—the awkwardness.

But surprisingly, it didn't. Not right away at least. Instead, I reacted in a way that shocked me. You see, Rhonda and I were never close. There had been times when we had found each other on the same sides during arguments or escapades of our youth, but we had never been friends. But looking at her, an overwhelming feeling suffused me, and I had to battle a big, dumb smile.

It felt like my muscles had been clamped tight for hours and now that everything was still and quiet again, everything just melted away. I could finally breathe and relax because we were done. Finally, tonight was over and we were free and alive and safe.

And suddenly, I didn't care that we had never been friends. I didn't care about what had happened this morning and I didn't care that we had gotten into fights.

I only cared that she was still standing.

And I suppose that was why I did it—hugged her, I mean. It wasn't something I had planned on doing—in fact, I had figured I would just pat her shoulder and say, 'Didn't know you had it in ya, Princess' and that would be it. But she had stopped inches from me and it all hit me that this girl—this stupid and whingey and overdramatic girl who could never stop mouthing off—had actually done it.

And so, when she stopped in front of me, I reached out and pulled her towards me. She was surprised, I could feel it. Her joints stiffened and her breath caught for a moment as she realised what was happening.

I didn't care.

I didn't care how out of character or weird it seemed. I didn't care if it made anything weird. I didn't care that she was fire and I was ice and fundamentally, that made us unable to get along. I didn't even care that this would mean I'd have to sit through a bunch of lame jokes for the next few months.

I was just happy that she was okay.

My heart was like an explosion in my chest. I had already been trembling due to the lack of energy and hoped I wasn't pushing too much weight onto her—although, she probably wouldn't have noticed, given how strong she supposedly was. Silence rung as she stood there, not sure what to do. She didn't push me away like I expected, but she didn't hug me back either.

So, I cleared my throat and let her go. Stepped back until we were at an arm's length apart. It was pretty awkward. Neither of us knew how to respond to that, so we just stood there, shuffling our feet and kicking dirt. My cheeks were burning. I hoped she couldn't see. I cleared my throat.

"How did you . . ." I trailed off when her face rose back to mine. "Rhonda, how did you do that?"

It hurt to talk, I realised. My throat was dry and scratchy and honestly, I was still feeling warm and overwhelmed and whoozy. But I needed to know how she was so strong. I couldn't do something like that—throwing a Mutant as large as that with one kick or breaking its wrists with my hands. Why was she?

Her eyebrows came together as her gaze fell to the floor. Words ruminated in her head. Her eyes moved back and forth across her boots as she planned a response.

Her eyes then found mine. "I—"

She was cut off by another scream. It rushed in from the air, like we were in the middle of a horror film, and we slammed our hands onto our ears. It made my head spin. I shuffled my feet and fought back a groan.

We stood there for a moment, shivering in the wind until the air was clear and everything was silent.

Except us.

We exchanged a look, already knowing what it meant.

More Mutants.

---

We were led back to the city and landed in a tiny alleyway.

Sliding against the wall, we watched around the corner where there were four Mutants wreaking havoc. It was a wide street; people were being chased but many had already been caught. Shadows stretched from the bodies on the ground, people who had already had their energy taken from them.

I could feel my knees buckling. Swallowing, I leaned back against the wall.

"You good?" Rhonda watched me from the corner of her eye.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," I said and pushed against my knees to straighten. It had been quiet as we had travelled back. Aside from working out a plan, this had been the first time we'd spoken since I'd hugged her. I avoided her gaze and pushed my braid over my shoulder. "I've been hit much harder."

She glanced at me for a second than turned her attention back to the street. Her eyes traced over the bodies and I caught her throat bobbing, lips turning downwards.

"They're not dead," I told her. She looked to me again. "The people—they're still alive, but very tired. Draining, uh, it can't kill you—not that I'm aware of. So, drained, but not dead."

Not yet, I silently added, but kept it to myself.

Rhonda pressed her lips together and nodded.

But her eyes flashed when she caught a larger Mutant grabbing an older woman. She wore a long dress and had her hair tied back into a headscarf. The woman struggled, hitting its fist and kicking at the Mutant's chest, but it merely chuckled, then opened its mouth to suck her energy.

Rhonda's jaw clenched. She straightened up and moved to leave when I surprised us both and reached out to hold her wrist.

"Um, just so you know," I said before she could say anything. "Things are about to change for you—officially. Up until now, nothings been permanent. Not yet. But the minute you step out of this alleyway, you're a Guardian. You know that, right?"

She was silent for a moment. "I wouldn't have come back if I didn't."

It eased my nerves.

I smiled, letting go, and moved around her. I didn't know if I imagined it, but I swear I caught the right side of her mouth moving upwards.

She then spun around and shot out a wire that wrapped around the Mutant's wrist. She tugged hard and jerked the Mutant to the side, forcing it to let go of its victim. I stepped forward, raising my hands, and felt my vision pulsate as a forcefield materialised around the woman. It caught her before she could hit the ground and for a moment, she hovered in the air, blinking. There was a tingling in my head that pushed my nerves together as I thrusted my arms outward, moving the woman to safety and away from the Mutants. Twirling my fingers, several more forcefields wrapped around the slumped bodies and with rapid movements, they were moved away from the fight.

It made the floor lurch and I fell forward, clasping my knees. Light spun in pieces across my vision. Air bubbled around my face and I blinked rapidly, sucking in deep breaths and trying to focus.

I looked up when I heard something approaching and saw a Mutant coming at me. Clacking my teeth together, I threw my knife up so it flipped through the air. Light bounced from the blade and threw cold squares over the ground, before I caught the handle like a butcher's knife, and bolted.

The Mutant didn't hesitate. Pivoting on its heels, it swung for me. I sunk to my knees and slid across the ground, sailing beneath the fist. I jabbed the knife into its side and rolled away, landing in a crouched position.

Everything spun, but the ground stayed pressed against my palm. I sucked in more breaths, feeling something drip down my face. Thuds echoed from my right. Turning my head, I saw another Mutant charging and huffed.

Hair swishing behind my shoulders, I swiped at the blood on my cheek, shaking my hand out so droplets flew from my fingers. I pushed from the ground then leapt into the air. Swinging around, I twisted my body until I felt my knee smashing into the Mutant's face. It fell and landed on its elbows, and I sprung back onto my feet.

Swinging my hand, the knife ploughed into its shoulders, and I leapt backwards. Hurtling my body into a flip, my mind turned to flames when a forcefield materialised and I landed against it. Twisting my wrist, the forcefield maneuvered, tilting into a slant so I could press my toes and hands against it in a spiderman pose.

I heard another movement and snapped my head upwards. My eyes caught onto the last Mutant. I snapped my teeth together and was about to push off from the forcefield, when—

"Blue Jay!"

I looked past the Mutant's shoulder.

Rhonda had been following the plan—with her wire still attached, she had kicked off from the lamp posts to encircle and bound the larger Mutant.

But she needed help.

I flexed my thighs before kicking off with as much strength as I could muster. Light hurtled over me and scattered my shadow far across the ground as I shot across the air. The wind became scathing, whipping past me to ferociously tear my eyes.

I pushed out my fist until it smacked into the smaller Mutant's face. The force was so great that the creature sailed backwards until its body had smashed against the larger one's ankles. I landed on my hands and the balls of my feet in a crouch and whipped my gaze upwards. The larger Mutant came down in a large crash and swinging my hand. I sent my knife forward. It sunk into the Mutant's large, bulky arm and the creature howled. It sent tremors down my spine. Immediately, I spun on my feet. Looking to the right, Rhonda had snapped her wires back into her arms when her gaze fell on the smaller Mutant. She leapt and flipped, landing on the Mutant's shoulders, and sent her blades into its skin with a cry.

Blood spurted onto her face, but her eyes rose to mine. We both flung out our wires, kicked off from the ground and sailed for the roof.

The minute the ground was back beneath my feet, I spun around and threw up my hands. Buzzing sensations pummelled down my spine as sparks skidded across the air. They spread into a shimmering mass, stretching until it was wide enough to twist around and cover the Mutant. It roared, bashing its fists against the wall, and the ground churned beneath my feet. The sides of my head felt like they were on fire, but this was the last one. I just had to push everything that I had into it so no one else could get hurt.

The light splashed over our faces, twisting to wrap around our necks, and over the Mutant's shoulder, I noticed the moon rippling. The air shimmered against the windows which flared from the lights and sent molten ripples across the ground.

People slowly came out onto the streets. Aches and pains blurred my vision, but I could see them. Moving out from their hiding spaces, eyes bugged out as they watched the glowing sight. Most stayed where they were, merely peeking their heads out from walls, cars or windows, but some moved onto the sidewalk for a closer view.

The Mutant hollered, hitting the barrier. Painful jolts pinched down my spine and beneath my arms. Somewhere along the way, I realised I was shaking so hard that it made it hard to stand.

I gritted my teeth and forced one foot in front of the other. The air slipped down my face like a hot liquid and something pumped dry in my throat. But I raised my eyes back onto the Mutant. Its skin ripped apart and an explosion spun out against the barrier. It almost knocked me from my feet when a pair of hands appeared around my elbow.

Rhonda.

I gritted my teeth and pressed my heels into the ground. She didn't say anything, but I could feel her watching me. My head ached, swelling from the centre of my mind, and thrashing at the walls of my skull. It hit so hard that my vision swerved with it. I scrunched my nose and shook my face. My insides reddened like they were being burned. I wanted to drop everything and curl into a ball. It seared and left me breathless, a thin ringing echoing in my ears.

Questions spun in my mind. Where was this coming from? It shouldn't have been the draining, right? Normally, that left me tired and dizzy. But not like this. It felt like I had taken the brunt of the explosions rather than my forcefield. Had that been one of the Mutant's abilities?

But I was too tired to care right now. I threw my hands down and bent over my knees, sucking in deep breaths.

I wanted to let the pain subside, let it drain from my body. The air still wrestled with itself, moving things where it shouldn't be, but it felt cooler against my face. I ducked my chin for a moment, resting my eyes shut, and listened to my chest pound.

I heard Rhonda shuffle, letting out a breath. "Is it always like this?"

Despite it all, I shrugged. "Eh."

She looked at me again. I opened my eyes, tilting my face in her direction, and was surprised when her lips lifted into a grin. The breeze made her hair dance, rolling around her shoulders and beneath her jaw. And over her shoulders, the moon was bright and pale. I felt my own mouth quirk in response. It was a rare moment of peace between us.

But then, we heard another sound—clapping.

No, applause.

I exchanged a look with Rhonda than straightened and moved toward the edge of the roof. Peering over the side, we saw that everyone had crawled out from the stores now. They poured out onto the sidewalks in larger clusters. Some were covered in debris, in various states of dishevelment, but their faces all held bemused smiles. Some laughed, some pointed and gushed to their friends, and some pulled out their phones to record us.

Normally, it annoyed me when they stayed to record rather than leave. But I was exhausted. The Mutants had been dealt with. I was just happy that it was over and we could go back home.

"Smile for the cameras," I heard Rhonda murmur. When I glanced at her, she was already watching me. She saw my confusion and merely shrugged. "You're a hero. Let them know."

I paused, unsure of how to feel about that.

I still didn't think of myself as a hero. It made me uncomfortable. Whenever I heard the term nowadays, I shied away from its usage. I still wasn't sure why. All I knew was that I didn't like staying back for photos or interviews anymore. I was still afraid of what they would say about me if I gave them anymore than what I already had. So, I hid in the dark and ducked from the attention whenever I could.

But . . .

I noticed how Rhonda's face fell. She clearly believed I was a hero but given how she immediately had turned to me while ducking her face from the crowd, she didn't think that of herself.

I pressed my lips together. Was that how I looked?

Then, I surprised us both again when I reached out to take her hand and raised it in the air. Starlight fled around us, twisting around our fingers, and everyone roared with cheers. Rhonda's mouth dropped, eyes moving from mine to the crowd, who took more photos.

I smiled at her. "We both are."

---

The night came in layered shadows.

In a swirl of black and blue. The air gained an acid taste that soured my tongue and covered my skin in goosebumps. I had my hoodie pulled tight around my body, but I was still in my uniform. Though we wore stockings, they did nothing to protect us from the night air.

I had my school bag tight against my chest in a sad attempt that it might keep me warmer. But another breeze swept over me and it became apparent how pointless this action was. There was a painful tingling that slashed across my cheek, and I hissed. The wind was like a knife to my skin. I bit down on my lip. The cuts had since stopped bleeding, but they needed to be sewn shut, and who knows how long it would be until they healed completely? It made me roll my eyes. That my ribs had just healed and now I had to nurse the new cuts on my face. Out of the pot and into the frying pan.

Another breeze had my leg bouncing, trying to get the blood racing again. I released an agitated noise and looked back to the automatic doors, as if my stare would beckon Rhonda to come back. We had been heading back to hers when she had randomly insisted on stopping to pick some things up first. I didn't have it in me to even question what she was yammering on about—an action I now seriously regretted—so I had opted to stay behind as she disappeared into the stores.

That had been nearly ten minutes ago and it was a tiny convenience store. What could be keeping her so busy?

I raised my hand to bite back a yawn. Stretching and rolling my wrists, I realised just how tired I had gotten. My eyelids felt like they were being pulled down by sand. I scrunched my face and pulled out my phone to check the time. It showed a text message instead that I had missed from a few minutes ago.

It was from Lila.

06:41pm: OMG, was that teamwork that I witnessed this afternoon?

06:41pm: I'm sorry to have missed it :((

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help smiling. Of course she had seen it; with how many people had filmed it, I wouldn't be surprised if the footage had found its way onto twitter—again. I could just imagine her curled up in bed, scrolling down her feed and clicking on multiple hashtags to watch any clips that she could find. Wait until she found out about the fights that hadn't made its way onto the world wide web.

Leaning back against the bench, I pressed a hand to my face. Like it would soothe the throbbing. It hadn't gone away yet—the headaches. It wasn't like the times before when it had simply been exhaustion, this was different—it was like I had done something else this time. Something was different. And because of it, I was feeling the repercussions more powerfully.

I wish I knew what I had done.

"Here."

I jumped and looked up to Rhonda. I hadn't even noticed that she had exited the store. She stood in front of me, city lights flooded from behind. Her face was blank, eyebrows pushed together, but she had something in her hands.

Looking closer, I realised that it was a soda.

"Thanks," I accepted it, eyes lingering on the plastic bags in her other hand. I shrugged it off, too tired to interrogate, and cracked the can open. It let out a sharp hiss and I threw my head back, taking large gulps. The drink came down in fizzing layers across my tongue. It wasn't as good as water, but it was still something. I finished half of it in seconds.

Rhonda sat beside me and shifted plastic bags between her knees. She stared ahead, lips pressed together, but her features twitched. She then slowly turned in my direction. She didn't say anything, simply watched as I gulped down the soda. I half expected her to comment on how ugly I looked, but she didn't. She merely watched with a small frown.

Eventually, she opened her mouth.

"You really don't feel it?"

I stopped. "Feel what?"

"The—that," she gestured at me. "You fought, like, a hundred Mutants. And me. And got drained. Doesn't it hurt?"

"Well, it's no picnic but, erm . . . yeah, it hurts," I told her and put the can down so I could lean back. It was colder without my bag pressed to my chest, but I found I didn't care as much. "It hurts to breathe, much less move. But . . . that's just the thing about being a Guardian. We become stronger. We're able to shake off a lot more than we should. I don't know our limit, but I know that we're nothing like we were before."

Light shuffled across her face as she looked away. The space between her brows crinkled. She twisted her lips to the side. I didn't know if I had given her the answer she wanted, but she was mulling on it. She then shook her head and dropped the plastic bag into my lap.

I jumped and moved my school bag to the side so I could examine it. "Wha—"

"Lila mentioned you running out," she interrupted without looking at me. I was rustling through the bag when I came across what she must have been referring too. "You obviously know nothing about makeup, so I figured I'd do you a service and pick some up."

I plucked a tube of concealer, examining the plastic item, then twirled it around in my fingers.

"Yellow?" I raised my eyebrows.

"Counteracts the purple in the bruises," she stated and pulled another soda from her own plastic bag. There was a tiny hiss! as she opened it and took a small sip. "Peach covers it up when it's healing and looks more yellowish. The other concealer I got because quite frankly, you have an atrocious sense of shade. The other was too pink, but this one matches your undertone. Should look natural."

I stared.

"It's basic colour theory," she said with a shrug, still not looking at me. "I used to get bruises all the time from cheerleading. I've learnt a thing or two over the years."

"I, um," I stuttered and looked at the several concealers. "Thanks? Yeah. Thank you, Rhonda."

"It's nothing," she shuffled. "We're a team now, right? Figured I should help in the areas that I'm obviously needed in."

She was uncomfortable. So was I. It had become a pattern for us, mocking one another then fighting and proving the other one wrong. It was still bizarre to even be on the same side. Even moreso that our lives now depended on one another.

But despite it all, I smiled. I was still in a lot of pain but the gesture softened the discomfort in my chest. I tilted my head back, feeling the starlight fall in a milky haze as I finished the last of my soda.

Despite everything that had happened, I felt at ease.

"Did you mean it?" she suddenly asked. I looked at her. "About never being that girl again. Did you mean it?"

She was looking at me this time.

It was the first time I could actually read her expression. Her eyes became gashes bleeding everything she felt out, and I felt something shift in my chest. Her hair had been pulled back out of her face, but strands still fell over her forehead and eyes. Her lips had parted, like she still had words she wanted to say, but she stayed still and waited for my response.

"Yeah," I answered. "It's just not possible, y'know? That girl was the you before—before the powers, the superheroes, the aliens . . . before the talking cat." Despite herself, she cracked a smile. "Even if you decided you didn't want to be a Guardian, how can you go back? You'd have to forget everything because like it or not, now you know. You know what it's like on the other side, you know that there's so much more than what you ever could have envisioned. And knowing that stuff changes you. We'll never be those kids again."

I watched her carefully. Rhonda could be ridiculously hard to read sometimes. For as emotional as she was, it was like she monitored herself. She was always fiery and intense but it was becoming apparent how much her perception weighed in her mind.

Rhonda merely pressed her lips together, nodded and turned her gaze back.

I didn't know if I disappointed her. Maybe she really had come to regret her decision.

It had been rough today and I wanted to tell her that not every time was like this. Sometimes, it was one Mutant and sometimes, it was many. But I would be lying if I did. This was a hard life. Soothing her fears with promises that it would get easier would make me a liar. Because it wouldn't. Not even with a fourth member. It would still be us versus an army.

"I'm sorry by the way," I said. "Not just for the fight but everything. I know how hard it is to adjust to all this. It feels like you're thrown off the deep end and expected to swim. And it's even worse when you can't get a hold of your powers because ultimately, ours don't work like Lila's, do they? They're not something that just happens, they take time and practise. We have to train and overcome so much crap in order to control them. I know what it feels like and yet, I still took everything out on you because you weren't reacting like Lila did—you were reacting like me."

She didn't say anything at first. She didn't even look at me. I tried not to let it bother me. I had been an asshole. I knew how it felt to freeze up like that. Defeating the bad guys seemed fun and easy in movies, but it became much more when it was suddenly you doing the running and defeating. You suddenly felt very boxed in as it hit you in a tenfold that it was your skin you were risking. Your neck that could be snapped. It was an experience that put you back into your body where you suddenly became aware of your many, many faults. It didn't feel right blaming her for expecting her to act otherwise.

She was a person before she was a hero.

We all were.

Rhonda pursed her lips and lifted her face to the sky. The stars reflected wet in her eyes and she moved her legs to her chest. Her feet tucked in against her thighs and she wrapped her arms around her knees. She looked very, very small.

"Does it ever get easier?" she asked in a tiny voice. "All this—the pain and the . . . stress. Does it ever go away?"

"Not really," I told her. "You just . . . sorta learn to live with it."

She nodded.

"Nothing will ever be the same again," I repeated. "You know that, right? That normal won't exist for us."

"Yeah, I figured," she responded then turned back to me. "Do you miss it?"

"Miss what?"

"Normalcy. Being ordinary, I guess."

I thought for a moment.

"When people think of superheroes, they think of shiny capes, flashy powers and cheesy smiles, like its all cameras and glory—I used to as well," I said. "But the truth is that being a Guardian—a hero—it means that you have to fight through some really dark days to ever feel normal again. Ordinary is something we have to earn."

She watched me for a moment. "How do you do it, after everything that happened?"

"What?"

"Stay so strong." And this time, as she watched me, I understood. There was a weight in her gaze that wanted to bleed. Her mouth trembled, wanting to pull back over her teeth, and her face twitched as she fought against the urge. I knew the feeling, when you felt so much that you wanted to burst. You wanted to scream into the night and break things. And if you couldn't, the feeling became so overwhelming you wanted to tear the skin from your face. "I—I mean, you had to fight alone and without powers. I know that had that been me, I would've lost a part of myself. I don't think I'd be able to function, but you . . . you did. You stayed strong and kept going. You kept your heart. How?"

The wind rolled her hair back. She was barely keeping it together, it was written all over her face. She had wound her hands so tight so she wouldn't strike out and do something crazy. I could see her fingers tremble, and how she pressed down on them to suppress what she felt. It made me want to hug her, but I resisted. It would make her feel worse. Rhonda hated being pitied and it was a coin toss whether she would take sentimentality in this state as being pitied.

I had to watch her actions. Let her make the first move so I wouldn't unintentionally provoke her.

It almost made me smile. Was this how Lila felt around me?

"Who says I did?" I admitted and lowered my face.

It made Rhonda frown, confused.

"I used to think that pain made us stronger," I said, swallowing the lump that had risen in my throat. "So, the more I suffered, the stronger I became. I would get knocked down and feel proud because it was supposed to make me the perfect superhero—the perfect girl. But I was wrong. Those weeks were the worst time of my life. Do you know why?"

I paused and waited for her answer.

Silently, she shook her head.

"It was because I was alone. I was faced with the reality that I had cut everyone that mattered to me off. I had no one to fall back on. I was alone. I would almost die one night and couldn't tell anyone about it. I had to keep going, pretend that I wasn't secretly dying on the inside. I could feel myself disintegrate, molecule by molecule. I was killing myself, more than any Mutant could, or even Serec. And it didn't start getting better until I had Lila."

I stopped when my throat began to clench. I ducked my face to wipe my nose and clear my throat.

"She didn't have powers like ours; she didn't have to train hard in order to understand them. She was already a natural at this whole superhero gig so she could afford to be there for me. I could finally open up in what felt like years about everything I'd been keeping to myself. And it felt good. I like having someone understand what I was saying. I liked relying on someone else. And soon, it wasn't just her—there's Arnold, Nadine, Savannah, Eugene, Gerald somehow. I've talked to more people this year than I have since we got to high school."

I tried smiling but something hitched up my throat and instead, a strangled laugh that sounded like a sob came out. Everything softened until it became warm, and my vision became wet.

I pressed a hand to my eyes, recollecting myself. But something hard was creeping into my throat, something that spread into a strained, cracked web in my chest. It suddenly hit me how much everything had changed—for the better. Being Blue Jay was hard—it wasn't a question. Everything had become more dangerous, exhausting and demanding.

And yet, that wasn't the only way in which my life had changed. Everything may be chaotic now, and often move in such sweeping hastes that left me breathless and spiralling to catch up, but it had also gotten . . . warmer.

Ever since I could remember, I had finished nights on my own. I had built walls so thick that no one could pierce them. That was how I liked it, alone, but never lonely. But ever since I had picked up that pin, I had started and finished my days with people around me. People who had more on their mind than Helga: The Big and Scary Social Freak. People who followed me because they cared. People who asked how I was and meant it. People who had glimpsed at the girl beneath the mask and hadn't run away.

People who wouldn't leave me.

The light became heavy as the air dragged itself from my throat.

I suddenly remembered those nights I had spent with Lila, scrolling through Instagram and ogling at boys. Cackling at her bad impressions of Ms. Ainsley and Mrs. Brown. Fighting over which spotify playlist we played as we wrapped our injuries in her bathroom. Rolling my eyes whenever she would lean over and act offended that I had still managed to get the wrong answer after she had thoroughly explained to me how this algebra question worked.

And then I remembered Nel, and felt my inside soften. The way she would push me to catch up on my studies and hang over my shoulder, reminding me that it was circumvolute rather than circumvallate. How she always woke me a half hour before I had to leave for school, because if it wasn't for her, I would keep missing the bus. How she would wrinkle her nose whenever she caught what I typed into the Netflix search bar but minutes later, would curl up by my side and lean towards the screen because she wanted to catch the killer before the police did.

I used to walk home with my head bowed, hoodie up, and wishing that I would disappear. Now, I smiled so hard that my cheeks hurt, laughing with Lila over something Nel had said, who would scowl and pretend she didn't hear us.

I've always kept a close watch over my heart; I was well aware that I had never been easy to get along with. People left and I couldn't blame them. I was a fracture, a black hole that consumed everything everywhere she went. My hands were war wounds that shred things to pieces because I would rather destroy things myself than have them destroyed. I figured I was never the type to have friends or loved ones, it had just never suited me. I was a wrinkle that people, one way or another, felt the need to iron out from their life.

But then, they appeared and I suddenly understood why they were different from everyone before them. It wasn't that they kept me from falling, but that they made me feel safe to do so.

What about me was worthy? Right now, I didn't care because being Blue Jay at least gave me this. My life had become dangerous, but somehow, it had gotten better.

I had gotten better.

"If your question is why I haven't lost my mind, then . . . it's because of them." I tried clearing my throat, turning back to Rhonda. "I stopped obsessing over what makes someone weak or strong and accepted that I needed help. I needed people." I wiped my face. "It's almost been three months and I'm still not completely over it. I still fall back on, why is she so much better than me? Can I be better? Was this all a mistake? I still struggle with accepting that I don't need to be everything and to do everything. I just need to be there and to be ready. That's all there is to it. I still have a lot of growing up to do and I don't think of myself as a hero, but I . . . I guess that's the good thing about hitting rock bottom. I only have up to go."

Rhonda didn't say anything. She merely stared with a funny look. I tried not to shuffle or feel uncomfortable. Her eyes were rimmed with red, but her mouth was in a thin line. She had moved her legs back to the ground and had her knees gripped in her hands.

Her eyes moved across my face. I wondered what it was they all saw when they looked at me—this side of me, not Blue Jay. Were they all looking for the same thing and more importantly, did they ever find it?

I then shook my head, getting to my feet. I swung my backpack over my shoulders, gathering the plastic bag in one hand and my empty soda in the other, and turned back to Rhonda.

"We should get back to Lila," I told her gently then move to head out from the park. She didn't move right away. I could feel her watching as I left, reeling over what I had said. I didn't rush her. I knew that she needed some space.

And honestly, so did I.

I was moving differently, I realised. My body still ached; there was an ache on the side of my face and my joints hurt with every movement.

And yet, it suddenly felt easier to breathe.

Lights crashed over me as I stepped out into the street. I wanted to lift my arms and throw my head back, breathing in the stars. The breeze rolled past me, making everything blur and run together, and my hair danced wildly around my shoulders. The colours were warm and dewy; they made me smile.

I didn't know what it was about my realisation that had such a profound effect, but what I was aware of was that the weight on my shoulders didn't hurt as bad. It was still there, but not as heavy. It wasn't like I had just realised that Lila and Nel cared, but it suddenly hit me tenfold how happy I was. How happy they made me. I knew that this life wasn't safe or desirable, and yet, I was still happy.

Because I wasn't on my own.

---

"Lila!" I growled. "How many times have I told you to stay in bed?!"

I gave her another shove and her head bumped against the headboard. I froze, worried that I had used too much strength. She had, after all, had an entire building come down on her this morning.

But then she started whining and I knew that she was fine.

"Aw, c'mon, Helga," she wailed. "I just wanted to change the song."

Aye.

I rolled my eyes at her and shook my head. I didn't plan on actually getting up to even humour her but I could feel her staring. I didn't need to look up to know that she was pursing her lips, twiddling her thumbs, and preparing a big, long and boring speech to rouse me from my seat. I huffed, hopping up from the chair and slamming my book down, before crossing the room to the music system.

I tapped the skip button on the phone before I could even read the song's title, and a faster acoustic song filled the room.

Lila grinned. "I love this song!"

"It's your playlist, dummy," I crossed my arms.

Maturely, she stuck her tongue out.

I rose a brow.

The door then swung open before I could respond and Nel and Rhonda trailed inside, carrying a tray of Thai food. Initially, I had turned down Rhonda's suggestions to buy dinner since I just wanted to get back so I fix my wounds and sleep off my exhaustion. But then she pointed out that everyone was most likely famished, and we might as well treat ourselves.

We deserved it, after all.

So, since she was paying, Rhonda picked and though I hadn't eaten Thai before, I wasn't feeling particularly picky and chose the red pork noodle soup. Rhonda had picked the pad thai and when we had texted her, Lila immediately responded with:

07:01pm: LEMONGRASS SOUP AND SEVERAL FISHCAKES!

Looking at it now, I could feel my stomach growling and had to tap my mouth to make sure I wasn't drooling. I didn't even care if I ended up not liking it, I just needed to eat something.

Nel ran along Rhonda's feet, eyeing the bowl of tuna.

Rhonda came to a stop when she saw the ruffled bed sheets and Lila's dishevelled hair.

At the redhead's sheepish smile, she turned to me. "She got out again?"

"Yeah," I nodded and leaned against the windowsill. Putting the tray down, Rhonda placed the tuna down for Nel to eat then handed me my bowl. "It's like taking care of a toddler."

"Tell me about it."

"You guys are mean," Lila pouted but was back to smiles and sunshine when Rhonda handed her her bowl. Snatching it, she immediately shovelled large spoonfuls into her mouth. Rhonda pulled a face which made me laugh and placed her fishcakes down on her bedside table.

"Would you slow down? You'll give yourself a stomach-ache."

"Your face gives me a stomach-ache."

"Boom," I added, mouth twitching.

Rhonda shot me a look before taking her own bowl and sitting at her desk. She twirled the chair around so she could face us and hooked her ankle over her knee. I noticed that her eyes lingered on the book I had left behind on the chair shoved beside the bed—Nothing Personal by James Baldwin.

Her eyebrows rose and she glanced at me. I shrugged. What? I'd been bored and Rhonda had a tonne of books in here like that.

Settling against the window, I swirled the soup around. We had all decided that Lila should spend the night at Rhonda's. It was larger and there would be less questions so Lila wouldn't have to put on an act like she would back at home. It took a little bit to convince her dad; he was initially reluctant given it was a school night, but then she had told him that she was studying at Savannah's and he had nothing to worry about because her parents were the type to make her sleep at nine.

He finally agreed to it, appreciating how concerned she was about her grades.

I glanced around. It wasn't like Lila was getting a bad deal out of it. Rhonda had a nice, fancy room, it was wide and open. Light beamed from the bulbs and washed the colour in a bronzed pigment, casting out shadows onto the pale walls. There was a wide desk pushed against the right, where Rhonda had a computer, a cup of highlighters, and containers of makeup. There was a tall bookshelf stacked with dozens of colourful spines. Books like Superior by Angela Saini, The Politics of Reality by Marilyn Frye and Feminism, Interrupted by Lola Olufemi.

I briefly wondered if she would mind lending me a book. It's not like we'd have much to do for the next two weeks.

Lila was spread across the bed, which was dressed in golden sheets and large, fluffy pillows. I honestly had no idea why she was making it such a big deal to be stuck in it. Sure, it wasn't really fun, but the bed was so comfy looking. To me, it seemed like a pretty good deal.

"How does it feel to be the one bed ridden?" I couldn't help teasing her.

She rolled her eyes. "You're exaggerating."

"A building fell on you."

"A building also fell on you and you were fine."

Rhonda scoffed at us. "No need to make it a competition."

"Wait, didn't you break that thing's wrists?" I asked, straightening against the sill. "And, like, knock it back with, like, one punch?"

A pause filled the room.

Nel and Lila stopped eating and raised their heads to look at Rhonda. For once, the darker girl flushed, seemingly embarrassed, and shuffled her weight, unable to meet anyone in the eye.

"It was a kick, meathead," she said uncomfortably.

"Fine, kick then—whatever," I set my bowl down. "Even I haven't been able to do that. What's that about?"

Though I asked Rhonda the question, all three of them exchanged looks, and I suddenly felt very out of the loop. It was quiet as they glanced at each other, not with surprise, but almost reignition. It hit me that I was the only one genuinely shocked by these events. I tried not letting that wound me and focused on the matter at hand instead.

Nel was the first to break the silence.

"Well, as we have discovered from our training sessions," she cleared her throat. "It appears that Rhonda has acquired a certain type of strength."

"Clearly," I crossed my arms. "So, what is it, a second power? Can we even have second powers?"

"Truthfully, I do not know," Nel admitted. "Sometimes Guardians are simply blessed with higher levels of power, such as faster reflexes or regenerative abilities."

Lila, who was chewing on her fishcake, raised her hand.

"Actually, I think I may have a theory," she said.

Crumbs dropped from her fingers, landing on her lap. Rhonda wrinkled her nose, looking like she wanted to say something, but closed her mouth and turned to me. She titled her head, raising her eyebrows, and I shrugged then waved a hand at Lila.

"Let's hear it then," I sighed and settled back into my seat, making myself comfortable.

"Well, I've been thinking about this—about how much damage Rhonda can do with a single punch, much more than Helga or I—" she stopped to roll her eyes when Rhonda shot me a smug look. I flipped her off. "—and Rhonda, you said you couldn't use your powers, but that entire time, you were still super strong, right? More than usual."

"Yeah," Rhonda said with a small frown.

"Well, what if you were actually using your powers?" Lila asked and placed her plate back down on the bed side table. "I mean, your power is that you can manipulate your density to pass through things, right? What if it works in reversed? So, you can increase your density to make yourself . . . really, really strong?"

I blinked and glanced at Rhonda. The brunette seemed quite surprised and rose her eyebrows.

"I mean, it's just a theory," Lila quickly added.

"No . . . no, it—" Rhonda thought about it. "It makes sense."

"You mean you weren't aware?" I asked.

"I mean, not completely," Rhonda turned back around in her chair, placing her elbows up on the back of her chair and edge of her desk. "I just know that when we were fighting, I was really, really angry and . . . yeah, it made me stronger. And when I knocked the Mutant back, I just kinda channelled it. I thought maybe it was a coincidence, how strong I had gotten, or maybe it was something that all Guardians felt when they were emotional, but I . . ."

She trailed off, allowing everything to sink in. Her face dipped as she thought it over again, reassessing everything. Her hair slipped over her shoulders, hanging around her ears, and she pushed her fingers into the back of her chair.

Watching her, I heard myself saying, "Holy shit."

"I mean, do you think it's possible, Nel?" Lila asked.

"Yes, Lila, I certainly do," Nel nodded, sitting up. "It's very possible that we haven't yet witnessed the true extent of Rhonda's abilities. She may be more powerful than I initially thought."

Rhonda shuffled, still uncomfortable, but her lips lifted into a half–smile as she glanced at the cat.

"You could've killed me, you jerk!" I suddenly barked at her. It was just now hitting me how hard she had punched me this morning. No wonder it took longer for me to get up.

Her expression snapped into a frown. "And who's fault is that, jackass?!"

"Yours, dumbass!" I snapped. "You're the one with super–super strength!"

"Okay, well, I saved your ass today so that totally negates this morning!"

"No, it doesn't!"

"Oh, please!" Rhonda set her food down and stood from her chair. "You're just mad because I'm strong enough to kick your ass."

"Excuse me?" I placed a hand to my chest. "Who's been a Guardian for longer, princess?"

"Who's the one that killed that big Mutant today?"

"Who's the one who killed the other Mutants today?"

"Guys," Lila groaned and pressed her hands to her face.

"Alright, meathead, you're asking for it," Rhonda put her hands on her hips. "A hundred bucks say I beat you at arm wrestling!"

Groaning again, Lila slumped back against the bed.

"A hund—I'm not made of money!"

"Someone sounds scaared."

"Don't sing, it doesn't suit you."

"Why you—"

"Rhonda has her Guardian name!" Nel suddenly burst and frantically looked between us. It made us all pause to look at her. She forced a smile. "Right, Rhonda? You were telling me as you were sorting the food out."

Lifting a brow, I turned to Rhonda.

She crossed her arms. "Yeah, I guess—I was thinking maybe something like Raven?"

My jaw dropped but Lila clapped in delight and sat upright. "Ooh, that's a nice one, Rhonda! Very mysterious!"

That made her smirk. "Yes, I thought as much."

"Jesus, must you all steal my thing?" I cried and stood up from the sill. "I came up with the named–after–a–bird thing and now you're both taking it!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Helga," Nel scoffed. "Birds have been a thing long before you."

"Yeah, and not to mention that superheroes with bird names aren't exactly original anymore," Lila pointed out. "There's Robin, Hawkeye, Black Canary, Night Wing, Falcon and a whole lot of others."

"Stupid," Rhonda murmured like she had actually added anything, and settled back into her seat.

"Stupid? At least—" my phone buzzed and I stopped. Sending her one last look, I pulled it from my back pocket and quietly groaned—Bob. Apparently, I'd missed four calls and several text messages.

"Geeze," I muttered. Like I really needed this right now.

"Something the matter?" Lila asked and when I looked back up, it was to their curious faces.

I opened my mouth to respond, 'Just family stuff, I guess,' when a funny feeling hit me. It made me pause and mull over how off that term seemed. Family, I mean. I'd never had a great relationship with the people in that house. They had never even bothered to hide that fact that I had never been their favourite. Admitting that to myself had always felt like someone was twisting a knife in my chest, digging it deeper and deeper until I stopped breathing.

Strangely, I didn't feel that right now.

There was still a slight pain, but largely, I felt nothing. I felt empty, apathetic. Like the pain was there but too distant for me to even care anymore. It felt like I had been holding onto a great weight my entire life, trying to prevent it from collapsing, but now that it had, I didn't care anymore. I had spent so much time putting off something disastrous that was bound to happen and now that it finally had, I was freer than ever.

'I liked having someone understand what I was saying.'

I slid my gaze across their faces. I would be lying if I said our relationships were perfect. But I felt more at peace with them than I had in years, perhaps my entire life.

'I liked relying on someone else.'

It was true that Nel and I had become more distant, but I would be lying if I said I still didn't care for her. She was the first to show concern for my wellbeing in years. She was the one who introduced me to all of this, had opened the door to my becoming Blue Jay. She had believed in me from the start, trusting that I had potential, and set her sights on proving it.

'So, if your question is why I haven't lost my mind, then . . .'

It was true that I didn't know where I would be had I not become a Guardian. Had I not been chosen. So much of my life had been affected from that one interaction. It was impossible to accurately guess what would've happened to me otherwise. But I know what wouldn't have happened—I wouldn't have been called out for only caring for myself. I wouldn't have remembered what I had done to Savannah. I wouldn't have approached Gerald or Arnold, and I wouldn't be able to call them friends.

I wouldn't be standing here, surrounded by people who cared about me.

'. . . it's because of them.'

Family was forever. And the people in my house, they weren't. But maybe these girls could be.

"No," I felt myself smile. "Nothing's the matter."

They still looked confused but smiled back anyway.

Taking my plate, I moved to sit beside Lila. She scooted to the side to make room and offered me a fishcake. I accepted and leaned back, letting the music finally sink in.

But truth is, though our days are through
There's a part of me that's a part of you
What was colours and blues
Fade under layers of new
But I'm not sure if I want it too

A smile spread across my lips and I had to fight to bite it back.

"Good, now down to the important stuff," Rhonda swung around in her seat, looking deadly serious. "Lila says that you went on a date with Shortman."

I glared at her in outrage. "Lila!"

Life will paint new ways
Love will come and go and it will stain
We were colours and blues

"You're blushing," Rhonda leaned in, looking like she was Sherlock fucking Holmes. "You're embarrassed. Did he kiss you?"

"Piss off, Lloyd!"

"Aww, that's such a cute shade of red—you should wear it on your next date!"

"I think I may have a dress that colour."

"Ugh!"

We'll be replaced with the new
But I'm not sure if I want us to
Not sure if I want us to

---

Not going to lie, this actually has been my favourite chapter so far. I know this chapter only spanned a few hours but like, I just love writing and reading Helga's emotional development, especially if it concerns Rhonda. Writing this, I'm actually so tempted to write another portion from Rhonda's perspective because I just love getting into that girl's head when I can (which unfortunately, has only happened once, but I intend to hopefully do more in the future!) I'm really excited to write their dynamic, this time in a more lighthearted way, and especially am excited to write about the impact they'll have on each other.

Anyway, let's get onto the reviews!

acosta perez jose ramiro: Yes, becoming a Guardian, or superhero at large, with a very small pool of support unfortunately has meant that she has to jump in without giving herself the time to think everything through. She's unfortunately had to have learnt that even spending a few seconds behind may leave enough room for someone to get seriously injured. Thankfully, the team is growing larger though! Thanks for the review!

Darkeiko: Hi! The next chapter actually opens with Arnold's perspective, so you'll be able to fully understand where his emotions and tohughts currently lie, concerning Helga especially. I will say that I wasn't interested in determining who the "good guy" or "bad guy" in the Helga vs. Rhonda fight last chapter. I was moreso interested in acknowledging that these are two very emotional girls, who both think they're in more control than they are, and both are reeling with Lila's injuries. Rhonda obviously could've done better, but I also don't blame her for not reacting heroically because this is a different world that she's never thought possible before. However, I do love writing her Guardian scenes now because she's slowly coming into herself and, in my mind, she's the fiercest member in the team because of how passionate she is. Stay tuned for her badassery!

AnimeMangaLover23: I feel so bad this took six months, but it's been posted and the next has been completed in the time between! Thank you so much, that means a lot to me! Those genres are my passion and it just feel so poetic that Helga becomes the centre of it, she just screams magical girl to me! And the further that the story goes, it becomes more and more evident why she was chosen first! Hopefully you enjoyed this chapter! Thanks for reviewing!

Song(s) Mentioned: Blue by Elina