A/N: AH i hope you're all ready! This reveals a lot and so little at the same time, but it's been a long enough wait. Here you go!
Chapter 35- Something More Than Gold
Jacques' lips were warm and moist, and, Josée realized - it was far different from any other kiss she shared with Claude. When Jacques' lips met her own, Josée tensed up ever-so-slightly, but then found herself returning it - she leaned in closer, taking his cues. She felt her heart beat rapidly against her chest in the moment, and only pulled away briefly to catch a few breaths. Josée felt a shiver go down her spine when Jacques caressed her jaw as he kissed her. It wasn't the bad kind of shiver where she was unsure and doubtful about the kisses she shared, thinking that she was a bad significant other, but this kiss she shared with Jacques was real and raw - and it confused her so.
She felt him smiling against her lips; and her stomach did a little flip.
At last, they finally pulled away and gazed into the other's eyes - a million thoughts shared between them.
"I think you're the first girl I've ever kissed," Jacques remarked.
Beat.
Josée's face was bright red, and was still catching her breath that she lost because of her lips against his. Then she couldn't help but let out a chuckle. "Liar. Camila Lemieux, in seventh grade - it was a truth or dare."
Jacques considered it. "Hmm, oui. But..." He looked at her so seriously that Josée was rendered shocked. "...You're the first girl that I wanted to kiss, and for a long time." He paused, then: "What about you? Did you want to?"
Josée's stomach was beginning to settle; the feeling scared her. "...Oui." What was this feeling? Then, Jacques moved closer to her with the intention of kissing her again. She let him, relishing in the feeling of his lips brushing against hers - though she tried to have her mind wander somewhere else, but... why was it so difficult?
She could hear her mother's voice in her head; warning her about the dangers of this - she was right. But Jacques wouldn't... wouldn't hurt her like that. Then again, Jacques had to take this kind of crud from her, as he put it. Josée visibly winced. But this kiss... and this feeling...
Josée pulled away from him and stared up at Jacques, who looked down at her in confusion. "Is everything alright?"
And he was so concerned for her, always. "Oui, I'm... I'm fine." Shrugging, Jacques leaned in to kiss her again, but this time Josée stopped him. "Jacques, we can't."
"Josée..."
"No, really, we can't," Josée insisted, though the funny feeling in her stomach returned. She had to pry her eyes away from the hurt look on her partner's face, and let her hands let go of Jacques' chest, though she really didn't want to. "I don't know where I stand with you, I... And you don't know where you stand with me."
"Chouchou..." Jacques remarked, and let it trail off. Josée winced; she could hear the hurt in Jacques' voice.
Josée bit her lower lip. "I think..." She paused. "I don't know, Jacques, I..." She didn't know what she wanted. "Can we just forget about this happening?" She hesitated to meet his eyes. Just as Josée feared, she saw hurt in Jacques' eyes for a brief second, but covered it up with a neutral, almost detached expression. She thought saying this would stop the rapid heartbeat that she never had before, but it only continued - this confusing feeling that was now coupled with guilt.
"...If that's what you want, Josée," Jacques said quietly, like he was trying to hide his disappointment. Josée sat down on the bed, staring at her hands. And he always looked out for her - put his feelings to the side for her, like he was doing right now. But what about her?
She didn't know, and, she wasn't sure if she wanted to.
"We should go downstairs to watch the rest of the episodes," Jacques offered, breaking the awkward tension. "Everyone's going to be wondering where-"
Josée stood up quickly. "Oui. You're absolutely right." Jacques proceeded to go, but before he could reach the door, Josée interjected. "You understand, don't you!?" she called out after him, almost desperately. Jacques stopped in his tracks and turned around. Josée was shocked by his almost stony expression, and bit her lip harsher. "It's just that... you're my best friend first, and... it would be unprofessional anyway, and I-"
"Don't worry," Jacques said softly. "I understand."
Josée wanted to get out of here. She wanted to get out of here so desperately. She didn't even wait for Jacques, she rushed out of the hotel room and practically ran downstairs. Just as she expected, all the contestants were staring at them, awaiting an explanation. Josée and Jacques didn't reply, and sat down to watch the rest of the episodes - that was, until Don explained that they had continued watching it without them, and that they were right at the elimination of the Ice Dancers'. Josée should've been focused on her tantrum that she didn't remember having, her mind went to the one thing she swore she wanted to forget.
They had kissed.
They had kissed, and it wasn't an ordinary kiss, it was a kiss that meant something.
She tried to convince herself otherwise for the remainder of the episode, and later, the remainder of the day. And, as it turned out, it would keep her wide awake at night.
They had kissed.
It didn't mean anything, she tried to convince herself.
...It was getting incredibly difficult to think so, and Josée fell into a restless sleep.
It was strange to say goodbye to everyone the next morning, since everyone was heading back home. Josée and Jacques exchanged the numbers of a few, which included the Fashion Bloggers, of course - and surprisingly, Devin and Carrie. It was their insistence, though, on the up chance of being asked to give them tango lessons for whatever reason. Josée very much doubted that she would see them again, anyway, so what was the harm? They lived in Quebec, but mostly everyone else lived in Toronto. The plane ride was mostly quiet, with spending the majority of their time reading their magazines, respectively.
Jacques' parents were waiting at the airport and eagerly greeted the two once they got back. Jacques couldn't help but have his guard up in front of them; it's like they knew something had occurred between them. It also didn't help that his parents had seen the episodes, so they probably knew that Jacques had feelings for his partner - despite him not... re-coming out to them; was that how it worked? Anyway, Josée and Jacques would return to teaching their students how to skate first thing tomorrow. Josée and Jacques, nonetheless, stopped by the rink to thank Avril for covering for them this past week they were at the reunion.
"Are we ready?" Jacques asked Josée, who nodded.
Both of them entered the rink and were swarmed with children happily crying out their names almost immediately. Josée and Jacques blinked and stared down at the kids that were hugging their legs very tightly, and then looked at Avril, who was watching with amusement.
"They missed you a lot," Avril explained, smiling a little.
"Yeah! We learned lots of spins!" one boy exclaimed gleefully. "And Avril's boyfriend showed up and kissed her one day!" A few made faces, but most of them giggled. Unlike Jacques' parents, the children the ice dancers taught were pretty blunt. Josée and Jacques were going to remember this after the class had stared at them oddly for the majority of the half lesson and occasionally broke into soft giggles. Jacques had no choice but to open his mouth to ask what was going on. Needless to say, one of them was very honest.
"Did you guys kiss under the mistletoe?" One of the children asked, prompting half of the children to make cooing noises, and the other half to giggle. Josée averted her eyes away from the students, which was practically giving away her answer, while Jacques let out an annoyed sigh.
"Mistletoes are for Christmas time," Jacques stated, though didn't confirm nor deny the question. It must've been painfully obvious if schoolchildren could figure it out. "We were going to cut class early, but since you're so insistent on questions..." He smirked when the kids reacted, breaking out into choruses of no's and that they were kidding. After that, they were dismissed - once everyone had left, this left Josée and Jacques alone on the ice.
"I don't remember being this nosy as a child," Josée mused, watching them go.
Jacques snorted. "Tell me about it. Do you want to get lunch?"
Josée shook her head. "No, I'd like to practice my skating for a bit." Jacques frowned at this for two reasons. The first reason that came to mind was obvious; it was likely that she was avoiding him after their kiss despite the fact that Josée told him to forget about it so it wouldn't be awkward - which he hasn't, by the way - and the second reason that came to mind was that she could be stressed, which, could potentially also relate to their kiss, but when she was stressed it sometimes resulted in her not eating.
As if she was reading his mind, Josée shot him a look. "Don't worry. I'll eat later. Go on."
Yes, she was definitely trying to avoid him. Nonetheless, Jacques exited the rink to grab some lunch with millions of thoughts in his head that he tried to push away, because that's what Josée would have wanted. She didn't want him, and, well, that was perfectly fine - it's what he expected, anyway. As he walked, step by step, he stared down at his shoes while his mind was somewhere else - he was determined to not think of Josée, and spent the time trying not to think of, which contradicted his goal entirely.
"Hey stranger." Jacques stopped walking and looked up to see Michelle, smiling at him. He felt her arms wrap around him comfortingly for a brief moment, before letting go. "I haven't seen you in a little over a week. Where have you been?"
Jacques shrugged, and offered a small grin. "In Toronto. There was a reunion for the stupid show we were in."
Michelle's smile turned into a smirk. "Yikes."
"I don't think it was that bad," Jacques said, but then he realized what the end of that trip to Toronto consisted of.
They had kissed.
Josée and Jacques had kissed, and it was the best feeling in his life - admittedly, better than any gold medal. Despite this feeling of dread that came afterward, which was the assumed thought of Josée not feeling the same way, he did not regret a single second of it and would do it all again just the feel her lips on his, and how connected he felt to her - hell, he didn't feel that connection with her when they performing, and well, they were in sync, then.
Jacques knew a bond of theirs wasn't to be toyed with; it was crazy how a kiss could change a dynamic so quickly - even though these feelings that one could argue were always there, it's a whole different matter when it comes to acting upon them, and that's exactly what he did.
But most importantly, Josée told him that she wanted to forget about it and to pretend it never happened, and because he loved her so much, he would do it. No matter how hard it would be. Jacques gazed at Michelle and smiled. "Do you want to go out to lunch?"
("Can we just forget about this happening?")
Michelle raised her eyebrows in amusement. "Out to lunch? As in, like a date?"
("...If that's what you want, Josée.")
Josée had probably forgotten it about now so Jacques should be able to, maybe not for his sake, but for her.
Jacques made his decision. "Oui. Like a date."
Michelle smiled, almost victoriously. "Oh Jacques, you have no idea how glad I am to hear you say that." Jacques weakly smiled back and accompanied Michelle to lunch. Forgetting about the kiss was going to be hard, and he almost didn't want to, but he figured Josée had moved on quickly and would chastise him for clinging to the past. Therefore, he would try and forget the kiss - asking Michelle out on a date was a step in the right direction.
"We had kissed," Josée confessed to Rachel's gravestone, hugging her knees to her chest. Despite telling Jacques that she was staying at the rink to practice, it had been a lie; she wanted to be with Rachel alone. Josée had rehearsed her speech regarding her and Jacques' kiss and her feelings surrounding it to Rachel - that she had yet to forget, uncertain as to why - but when she actually garnered her courage to go up to her late friend's grave, Josée drew a blank and had spat out those three words bluntly.
The cemetery gave her the creeps. Josée figured it was part of being a superstitious person, and Jacques would say it was a quirk of hers... and there lies the problem, why she had come here in the first place, her mind drifted back to Jacques, about their kiss - and she needed the advice of her friend. Yes, said friend was dead but, as Jacques stated, this was a quirk of hers - that she believed that maybe speaking to Rachel would warrant some advice in a way, shape, or form, that it would eventually come to her.
"My maman would be so ashamed, so embarrassed..." Josée said guiltily, then reached into her pocket to rub bun-bun. "But you would always tell me that it's about what I want, not what she wants..." She bit her lower lip. "It's been over three months now since you died, since maman died... maybe, it's time to move on? Is this the way to do it?"
Silence.
Josée didn't know why she was expecting something different. "We had kissed. He said he loved me. Love isn't... you can't just say things like that so casually."
But what if he meant it?
Impossible. Ice dancing partners can't fall in love, maman said so...
But wasn't maman once in love?
("It's just that... you're my best friend first, and... it would be unprofessional anyway, and I-")
Josée realized she hadn't clarified how she felt; only that she said that she couldn't be with him. At least, not in that manner due to reasons such as holding onto their friendship - which was already strengthened considerably throughout every obstacle they faced - and professionalism on the ice, which was her mother's preaching.
("Don't worry, I understand.")
"Jacques said he understood," Josée mused aloud, unaware of it. She blinked when she realized she was stuck in her thoughts, which consisted of replaying the aftermath of the kiss over and over again, despite once more, going back on her word of asking for her and Jacques to forget about it. She cleared her throat to Rachel to explain, as if she was really capable of listening. Josée liked to think to somewhere, she was. "He understood that we couldn't be... like that together, because of our friendship, and also because we need to focus on winning the gold, winning the olympics, and the fact that we need to present ourselves as more professional, especially after that race."
More silence filled the area.
"I already know what you're thinking," Josée remarked, rolling her eyes dramatically. "You want me to go for it. You want me to defy my mother, who would surely disapprove of the whole matter, but I simply can't." She paused, then glared at the gravestone. "That's if I felt the same way for him, which I don't."
You're saying that to use your mother's death so your excuse is plausible.
Josée frowned deeply. She could practically hear Rachel saying that. "I'm not," she insisted curtly. "You're just a hopeless romantic; always have been." Then, Josée's eyes softened on the topic of romance regarding Rachel. That being said, Josée stood up abruptly and wiped excess dirt off her clothes. Before leaving, she left her with this: "I wouldn't have minded being with you in that way, though." And she walked away. It was true. She wouldn't have minded being with Rachel in that way.
As for Jacques...
...well, admittedly, she needed more time to think about it, despite her insistence otherwise.
A few weeks later, and things were official between Jacques and Michelle. For an odd reason, getting into a relationship with her didn't feel so forced. Jacques found that he liked being around Michelle, that she was fun, and for the most part was laid back. But at the same time, she understood that she was Jacques' first... girlfriend, so she completely understood if he was stiff at first. Eventually, he gave into it - and part of him was oddly relieved. He felt free; that he wasn't judged by Michelle by his interest in men. It made her all the more attractive and wonderful to be around.
Occasionally Jacques had to remind himself that just because he found Michelle attractive and other women attractive, it didn't erase the fact that he was still attracted to men.
"Jacques..." Michelle whispered against his ear, making Jacques grin against her kisses on her bed. Needless to say, Jacques grew very comfortable - especially knowing that his feelings were completely valid. It helped that Michelle was the first person he officially came out to. Come to think of it, he hadn't come out to anyone else yet other than Josée, but he didn't want to think about her (especially right now, while kissing Michelle) - but he knew that the Montreal press was talking, and that his parents likely had a suspicion.
Dread filled Jacques; he would have to come out.
Again.
...He had an inkling feeling that coming out a second time would be harder than the first.
"Mon amour, is something wrong?" Michelle asked worriedly, wrapping her arms around her boyfriend's neck. "You seem tense."
Jacques sighed deeply. "The stupide press has seen me with you, holding hands together." Michelle furrowed her brows, which asked why was that such a bad thing. Therefore, Jacques answered: "I have to come out again."
Michelle frowned. "You shouldn't feel forced," she told him, "But I think that you should let your family and friends know, especially Josée. Does she even know? About us?" She didn't know, and, to be honest, Jacques wasn't sure whether or not he wanted her to know. "I'm not forcing you or anything, but... but you guys live together. You've been leaving more frequently to spend time with me, wouldn't she get suspicious?" Jacques concluded that she had a point. "We could tell her together, if you'd like."
Jacques considered it. By doing this, it would prove that he was over Josée - or at least, it looked like he was. He would be lying to say he didn't hold any feelings for Josée whatsoever - and still occasionally wonder what could've been - but this would be the next step by letting Josée know. Besides, they were best friends - he should tell her.
"We should go now," said Jacques. To get it over with, he added mentally.
Michelle blinked in surprise. "Are you sure? Right now?"
"Oui. Josée was spending extra time at the rink, she should be finished by now." Before Michelle could say otherwise, Jacques got up and proceeded to put on his jacket with the intent of leaving to go tell her. Frowning, he turned around to see Michelle staring at him. Jacques rolled his eyes. "I... I can't do it alone."
Michelle nodded. "Oui, I'm sorry." And she got up to follow him to the rink. By the time they got there, Jacques' theory was correct - he and Michelle found Josée taking off her skates in the locker room.
It only took a few seconds for Josée to notice. "Oh... Allo, Jacques." She glanced over to his girlfriend. "Michelle. What are you doing here?" She looked back at her skates and put them away in her locker and shut it. "You really shouldn't bring just anyone in here, Jacques, I've told you-"
"Jacques and I are dating," Michelle suddenly blurted out. Jacques' eyes grew wide at his girlfriend's bluntness, and Michelle herself seemed to be surprised too. Jacques looked back at Josée, who was staring at her locker so he couldn't quite see her expression - but she was frozen in place, with her hand still on her locker from shutting it. She was processing. It was tense, it felt like an eternity, but in reality it was only ten seconds.
It was Jacques who spoke up. "Just... thought you would want to know," he said meekly. Then, he kept his eyes locked on his partner, for any trace of movement. Then he saw it. He could've sworn, or maybe he had just imagined it - or maybe, he wanted to imagine it - that he saw Josée's hand against the locker shiver ever-so-slightly.
But when Josée turned around, Jacques was greeted with a surprising reaction.
Josée, with an utterly stony expression, first looked between Michelle and Jacques, and then stated neutrally: "Great."
Jacques raised an eyebrow, and Michelle raised both of hers. "Great?" they repeated simultaneously.
This time, Josée broke into a very wide smile. "Oui. Why wouldn't it be? That's wonderful, actually." Jacques and Michelle exchanged an odd look as Josée turned around to open her locker again, for whatever reason, and then slammed it abruptly shut. "I could've sworn that I put my blade sharpener in there, where is it...?"
"So you're okay with us going out?" Jacques asked his partner, who ignored him in favor of looking for her blade sharpener in her bag. "Josée-"
"Yes, of course," Josée insisted, smiling warmly at the happy couple, before rummaging through her bag again, despite looking through it already. "It has to be in here somewhere..." Then, it was as if she felt two pairs of eyes on her staring at her in disbelief. Josée looked up and looked between Jacques and Michelle. "What? Do you want me to break into a cheer routine with congratulatory banners?" she couldn't help but remark, but still with that smile. She waved it off. "Never mind, I'm not a cheerleader anyway. But really, congratulations both of you... you guys are... you guys are good together," she managed to get out, then without waiting for a reply, she left the locker room.
Jacques and Michelle watched her go.
"That's it, then?" Michelle asked, frowning at her companion, who merely shrugged.
"Oui," Jacques said, still staring at the door that his ice dancing partner had exited from. "I guess so."
Huh.
Jacques and Michelle.
Josée figured she couldn't have been too surprised. Michelle was pretty, and, Josée begrudgingly had to admit that she had grown up since they were in high school together and was now nicer. Back in their school years she was very popular and Jacques was in that same social circle, especially among the other dancers. Michelle would always remark that Jacques was a lot more fun before Josée came around.
So he had forgotten about the kiss.
For some reason, the pit in Josée's stomach dropped.
Despite this feeling, Josée affirmed that it was a good thing that he forgot about the kiss. She shouldn't have felt awful, yet she did, but she reiterated that she shouldn't - because after all, she had told him to get over the kiss, so she couldn't really blame him for doing just that. Josée even tried to smile a little at the thought. Jacques likes men and women, and Josée knew she should be happy that her partner was happy, that he had found himself - he had been happy for her.
Upon this discovery, however, Josée found that she had to strain herself to smile; why was it so difficult?
Now if only she could forget about the kiss, well, that would be great.
Josée laid down on her bed and stared at the ceiling.
Jacques and Michelle.
This was a good thing, Josée affirmed.
Really.
Jacques took a breath, standing in front of his parents' house. He had talked to his parents, as well as Gabrielle, and arranged a meeting there so he could tell them something very, very important. A week after Jacques told Josée, which was now, he figured that it was time to tell his family. Besides, the Montreal press had snapped more pictures of the couple regarding figure skating, which Jacques didn't really mind; the only thing that bothered him was the need to mention that Jacques was tied to the race.
"It's been a while since you stopped by, sweetheart," Fleur cooed to her only son, as she hugged him. Hector could only give Jacques a curt nod, while Gabrielle playfully punched his shoulder. "I was beginning to get very worried."
"Your mother always worries," Hector grumbled, in his chair reading the paper.
Fleur pouted at him. "A mother always worries."
"He's going to be twenty-three soon," Hector pointed out, then he glanced over at Jacques. "Is that what this is about? Your birthday? Because I'm going to be honest, I forgot to get you anything."
"Nice to see you too, papa," Jacques retorted sarcastically. "I actually have something important to share." He looked over at his sister, who's eyes were wide in anticipation. It's likely that she already knew, because, she was a little more in-touch and less naive opposed to their parents.
Gabrielle nodded encouragingly. "We're listening."
Jacques took a breath. "Since the race, I've been... having these feelings," he started off, and paused for some sort of reaction that indicated that they were going to interrupt him and say it, just so he wouldn't have to. Because truthfully, despite his parents' tolerance, Jacques was pretty nervous. He fiddled with his fingers awkwardly. "These feelings that I've had that I maybe had earlier and I didn't know, or maybe... maybe I didn't want to feel those things, and I always thought that I couldn't feel those things - so I just thought there was something wrong with me, and that I had to choose a side, and I learned that I don't have to."
Fleur, Hector, and Gabrielle merely stared at him.
Jacques cleared his throat. "So we know I like guys..." he started off, then added: "...but I realized that I like girls, too."
"You're bisexual," Gabrielle stated, it wasn't a question.
"...Oui," Jacques replied.
It was quiet for five seconds.
"I'm going to be honest with you," Hector began gently, "If you had told me this years ago, I would've been overjoyed at the thought of you realizing that you liked girls, but..." he struggled to put his words into place, "All that matters now is that you're happy, and if you bring home a girlfriend, or a boyfriend... I'd still support you the same. You need to be happy, son, alright?"
Jacques was stunned, but managed to recover to nod. Fleur got up to pull her youngest into a hug. Jacques buried his face into the crook of his mother's neck; hiding a few relieved tears that managed to slip out of his eyes. "Oh my baby, you know we love you, right?" Jacques nodded into her neck, sniffling. Fleur pulled away and gave him a motherly smile. "I... sort of had an idea that you liked men and women the moment we saw the race air, maybe earlier than that, but... the race made me sure."
Jacques frowned. "What do you mean?" He knew exactly what she meant.
"Josée," Gabrielle said simply. "It always came down to her. It was obvious from the start, and the race really showed the world how you feel about her. I think everyone knew how much you liked Josée but Josée, but I'm happy for the both of you now!"
Suddenly Jacques grew very cold. "I'm not dating Josée."
Gabrielle's smile vanished. "Wait what?" Even Fleur and Hector looked a little alarmed. "Isn't that the reason you're telling us that you're bisexual?"
Jacques raised his eyebrow. "Uh, no? I'm dating a girl named Michelle."
"Whoah, whoah, whoah," Hector cut in, leaning forward with a frown. "You don't like Josée in that way? Then what the hell did I just watch on TV besides you cheating and talking back to TV hosts? Jesus Christ that was embarrassing to watch."
"Papa-"
"I've seen you do at least six illegal things-"
"Papa!" Jacques seethed, huffing at him. He crossed his arms. "I don't have to explain myself to you. Also, I'm perfectly happy with Michelle." It was, on some level, true. He liked being around her; she was fun, pretty, and easygoing. Michelle didn't send him driving up a wall, and she... well... Jacques didn't have much experience with the opposite sex, but he knew that one night he had stayed over that he enjoyed spending time with her.
"It's not that we aren't happy that you're with someone that makes you happy, but..." Fleur trailed off, biting her lower lip. "Why now? I mean, I noticed that Josée had been very different with you lately ever since the reunion so we just assumed-"
Jacques cut his mother off. "Non. It's not like that. Just because we kissed-"
"You kissed?!" Fleur squawked.
"Oui, we kissed," Jacques snapped. "At the reunion. I told her how I felt, and then we kissed, but she doesn't feel the same way. She's a lot more awkward now, I wouldn't be surprised if we stopped being partners, she's acting strange in general." Jacques frowned, wondering why he was sharing this in the first place. "Why do you care so much?"
"You are a fucking moron."
"Gabrielle-"
"No, maman, he's an idiot," Gabrielle put bluntly. Hector gave a curt nod in agreement. Fleur looked resigned, but Gabrielle didn't care as she fixed her gaze on her younger brother's bewildered expression. "You heard me. You have no idea what's going on, do you? Hell, of course you don't - because you're an idiot-"
"Care to explain why I'm an idiot?" Jacques sneered.
"Now that Josée is starting to show feelings for you, you get together with someone else?!" Gabrielle shrieked in disbelief.
Jacques glared at his sister. "Josée is clearly not interested being in a relationship with me-"
"You honestly don't believe that, do you?" Gabrielle retorted. "God, you are such an idiot-"
"If that's what she said, then yes, I believe her! And if that's how she feels, then I can move on, which I have. Now shut up," Jacques snapped.
Gabrielle, unfortunately for Jacques, did not often do what she ought. "Don't even try to say you don't have feelings for her, you so do," she pressed, then rolled her eyes. "My god. Do you know what it's like to to watch you narrate your chouchou's life on television? Let me tell you, out of all the embarrassing things you did on that show, that has to be at the top of the list."
"Oh shut up! It's so funny how you barge yourself into my love life, which is completely happy around Michelle, while guys can hardly stand to be around you-"
"You little bast-"
"Okay, okay, okay!" Fleur got in-between them, waving her hands frantically while Gabrielle and Jacques continued to glare at each other. Meanwhile, Hector just rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. Fleur took several breaths, and looked at her son. "All that matters... is that you're happy, okay? Just... don't throw yourself in a relationship with someone like you aren't worth anything, because you are worth a lot." Fleur turned to Gabrielle. "Your brother isn't an idiot, or a moron."
Gabrielle sighed, and then said: "Congratulations, on... coming out a second time. Just, be careful, okay?" She stood up and hugged her brother briefly. "I have to go now. My shift starts in thirty minutes." She ruffled his hair, which made Jacques scowl. "Love ya. Bye."
After Gabrielle left, Hector stood up. "Alright son, now that you like girls, I guess now I have to give you... a talk that I never thought I would give to you." He waited for the information to sink in. Once it did, horror dawned on Jacques' face in realization.
"Non! No we're not!" Jacques shrieked.
Hector let out a sigh. "Jacques-"
Jacques plugged his fingers in his ears. "La la la! I'm not listening, I'm not listening!"
"Twenty-three years old, Fleur. This is your son."
"Oh no," Fleur disagreed. "The defiance, the stubbornness, that's all on you."
Jacques kept going. "Not listening, not listening!"
"Jacques, all I care about is that you don't get some girl pregnant, that's it."
"PAPA!"
Josée casually twirled her fork in her food for a late lunch. Normally she didn't eat takeout, but her thoughts were too preoccupied with her worry for Jacques; he had gone out to tell his parents that he was bisexual. She hoped that was going well. Then she got frustrated, because all of her thoughts ended up aligning with Jacques somehow, like how she hated eating takeout because Jacques was the one that cooked for her. She wouldn't overthink and worry the times when Jacques was there, reassuring her that everything would be okay - like he always did. Right now, she was concerned that Jacques' family won't take him coming out a second time well, even though she knows they will.
Josée slammed her fork down.
Stupid Jacques.
She stared down at her half-eaten lo mein.
Jacques hates lo mein.
Jacques...
He's been so stupid recently, Josée thought, and in a way unbeknownst to her, she was right. In Josée's mind, however, he had been stupid in a sense where he had taken up a lot more space in her thoughts as of lately, and sometimes it kept her up at night, ever since that kiss that that she still couldn't shake off. A kiss that didn't mean anything, of course. Josée had taken the liberty of repeating that to herself constantly. Obviously she couldn't bring up the kiss to Jacques, who had forgotten about it entirely - due to his relationship with Michelle.
Michelle.
Ugh.
Before Josée could continue her thoughts on Michelle, the constant inhabitant of her thoughts, known as Jacques, had arrived back at their apartment with a disturbed look in his eyes. She stared inquisitively at him, pondering what he would do next. "How did it go?"
"Fine," Jacques said, rather too quickly. "It was great! Mais oui!"
Josée raised a brow. "Then why do you sound so panicked?"
"They accepted me for being bisexual," Jacques told her, then added with a shudder: "Then my papa went to give me... the talk."
Josée blinked, and then burst out laughing.
"It's not funny, Josée!" Jacques exclaimed, his face red.
This reaction only made her laugh harder. "It's amusing," Josée corrected, barely able to suppress her grin. After many years, Josée was still trying to figure out how Jacques was able to make her laugh; it was completely involuntary. She managed to compose herself, however she kept her grin up. "So besides... the talk..." Josée could barely suppress her laughter. "...everything else went well?"
Jacques huffed. "Oui."
"Did you mention your girlfriend?" Josée asked, it felt weird to say that on her tongue. She watched her companion's face change for a second, but she couldn't detect exactly what it was. It was almost as if he was trying to think of something else to say, or that this was a topic he was trying to avoid discussing.
"I did. And they're happy for me," Jacques answered.
Josée considered this. Then, she asked: "Are you happy where you are?" There was a thoughtful pause, and Josée's heart began to race for whatever reason; almost like she hoped that he was having some doubts about his and Michelle's relationship.
"...The happiest I've been in a while," Jacques replied curtly. "I feel like I can be myself."
In that moment, Josée hated herself, because for some unknown reason that drove her mad, her heart sank upon hearing that answer. It shouldn't have hurt her so; hell, she didn't know why it irked her so much - but it did. However, she wasn't about to let him know that. "...I'm happy for you too, Jacques," she said softly.
"Merci, Josée. It's been almost a month-"
"A month?" Josée cut in incredulously. She couldn't believe her ears. "You had been going out for almost a month?"
Jacques' face faltered. "Ah, oui." He frowned at his partner rolling her eyes. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Chouchou..."
"Don't 'chouchou' me," Josée snapped. "You are such a moron sometimes, did you know that?"
"So it has been explained to me recently," Jacques retorted bitterly. "You said it was fine that Michelle and I are dating, Josée, I thought you were over this school drama..."
"Oh it's fine," Josée said firmly, as she stabbed her food forcefully with her fork. She averted her eyes away from him and tossed her food around. "I just wish you told me earlier, that's all," she couldn't help but mumble.
"Told you earlier?" Jacques echoed. "I just... I didn't think it was that important, and..."
"Of course it's important!" Josée exclaimed, before she could help herself. Jacques blankly stared at her. Josée stared down at her food. God, why was it so hard for her to look at him? "Because... because it's your first relationship... with a woman. It's a big difference from your past relationships. Why wouldn't you tell me this right away?"
Jacques shrugged. "I didn't think you cared about romance. You always said that you don't like seeking it..."
"My idea of romance," Josée began stealthily, "Is that if it happens, it happens. This doesn't explain why you wouldn't at least tell your best friend earlier that there was someone new in your life. You've always been able to do that with past boyfriends..."
"...I don't know," Jacques said honestly. "You know, Josée, you're acting very strange lately."
Josée's eyes bore into her food; she could feel the heat rising in her cheeks against her will. She covered it up with a huff and crossed her arms. "Just... I wish you told me. I mean, it's not that I really care," Josée made sure to emphasis for good measure, "it's your relationship but... it's important to know these things ahead of time, so we can..." She paused, trying to think of something, then her eyes widened with an idea. "... a schedule! For our ice dancing schedule! To practice... and all of that, and... she would want to take you on dates, and things like that... and they can't get in the way of our sessions, so..." she trailed off. Jacques looked at her strangely. Josée couldn't blame him; she was blabbering on and on like a total idiot. "...That's all."
Jacques kept that strange look on his face momentarily, before shaking it off. "Oui, that's fine. Also, I'm staying over at Michelle's... for the night."
"For the night?" Josée repeated, feeling her eye-twitch against her will. What was up with her?
"Oui, for the night."
Beat.
"That's fine. Just don't be stupid, and... be safe. Jacques, would you stop looking at me like that?"
Jacques blinked rapidly and smiled. "Ah, it's nothing, mon petit chou, you are just so cute."
Mon petit chou.
Josée had to look away from him again. "Right, okay. Are you going to leave now?"
"I'm going now, since you're so eager to see me go." Josée couldn't help but grin at that. Jacques stepped out the door, but before he left, he added: "Goodbye, Mon petit chou." And he left. Josée was grateful that he left, because she was sure she was unable to hide her flushed face.
Mon petit chou.
Josée went back to eating her dinner, despite her stomach flips.
"Merci, Isaac," Josée said, with a content smile.
It was now February, a month later, and Isaac had helped Josée and Jacques with a specific routine to prepare. Despite the fact that the two of them were unable to compete this season, next season wasn't completely off the table and Josée wanted to be prepared. From the looks of it, she and Jacques mastered it very well. This past month, well, they had gotten more in sync again. And sure, maybe when Josée got a little too close to Jacques' face when performing she would feel... things... she could only assume that it was the adrenaline, and the infamous 'dance trap' of course.
"It's no problem," Isaac replied in his office, waving it off. "Isn't Jacques with you?"
Josée shook her head. "No, I think he left already... with Michelle." She paused awkwardly after that. "I should get going." After Josée said goodbye, she slipped out of Isaac's office and eventually outside of the rink. Before she fully stepped out, her eyes laid upon Michelle and Jacques sitting on a bench; looked to be in an enthralling conversation.
Josée watched the pair closely - though it would be accurate to say she was really watching one person in particular.
Josée's heart began to accelerate at a rate she did not know was physically possible, the noises around her were muffled compared to the loud pumping of her heart, the blood rushing in her ears as Jacques' eyes finally met hers, giving her a friendly wave, before turning back to Michelle. During that moment Jacques gave her an ounce of attention for a mere second, Josée wanted nothing more than to be with him, a desire to be close to him. When Josée's eyes locked on Jacques' lips moving, she realized that she perhaps would like to kiss them again. Josée's breath caught in her throat, watching Jacques laugh at something Michelle said. He was beautiful.
Josée wondered if she was intoxicated like she was during the Ridonculous Race reunion that was making her feel this way, but she knew deep down that she was stone cold sober - just like she was when she kissed him for the first time, which she couldn't bring herself to forget about after this so long no matter how hard she tried. The very thought of her feeling this way without under the influence of a substance truly frightened her. It was all emotion, devoid of any logic, she just couldn't help but feel it. A realization began to trickle in her mind - however it was a thought one could argue that lingered all along, it was only now that she decided to finally acknowledge it.
Josée remembered her mother saying there was nothing worth more than gold; but now when she looked at Jacques - she would have to disagree.
Josée didn't like Jacques.
Josée absolutely, positively, with no doubt in mind - adored Jacques.
Upon realizing this, came a few thoughts within seconds. The first was overwhelming fear, then anxiety, and then acceptance. She accepted the fact that she really liked - and had a quite serious crush - on her best friend. She knew that this was problematic, that it would definitely be a barrier between the two, but nonetheless something she accepted. Maybe, just maybe, that tiny ray of hope in Josée's mind said that Jacques hadn't forgotten about the kiss, and that he still felt the same way. Anything was possible.
"Josée, are you there?"
The female ice dancer shook out of her trance to realize that Jacques and Michelle were no longer sitting on the bench, but standing right in front of her. "...Oui. Oui I'm here."
"I just wanted to tell you that Michelle and I are going to get lunch," Jacques told her.
Josée blinked and looked between the two, as if he had said something out of the ordinary. Then, Josée watched as Michelle wrapped her arms around Jacques' neck and pulled him into a quick kiss; it was then Josée realized what Jacques' stance was regarding the kiss that they shared back at the reunion - and she remembered exactly why she felt so bothered when he and Michelle had gotten together.
"Oui, that's fine," Josée managed to say. She hoped that he didn't notice her voice quiver.
Josée felt her heart drop to her stomach; a thin line forming when she watched the lovely couple walk away and they kissed fully on the lips again. A familiar feeling welled up in Josée's small frame, a feeling she felt was too strong for her to handle; it was similar to anger, but not quite - she felt nauseous and disgusted at the display. She saw Jacques kissing Michelle the way he kissed her then; and seeing it with someone other than herself, well, Josée would've rather been punched in the stomach. Hell, she would've welcomed it - because anything was better than this feeling.
Josée knew what she could've done. She wanted to scream, hell, she longed to have a tantrum over this matter... but she was too tired to even do that. Besides, it was her fault, she decided - she had said she wanted to forget about it. He put his feelings to the side for her sake, and it was too late for her to realize that she had felt the same.
If Jacques could put his feelings to the side for her, then Josée could do the same for him.
Instead of having a tantrum, Josée had her held up high and walked back to the rink; if she wasn't going to get him back, she might as well focus on the one thing she had left - and she could try to make her feel as though gold was worth more than her partner.
But she would be lying.