Holiday Not-Much-Help
"Alright, my Cloud 9 Angels, we've got a couple of news before we start off for today!" Tai excitedly gripped onto a clipboard.
"Have you heard of that phrase 'no news is good news'? That applies here too," Koji slipped off his bandana in frustration.
"It would also be nice if we could get through a pre-shift meeting without any attitude," Tai blared.
"It would be even nicer if we could get through a pre-shift meeting without a stupid announcement on how our next shift gets stupider," Rika smirked.
"Any-hoooo! First things first, let's look around and give a round of applause to our new holiday help! They'll be here to give an extra hand during the next couple of we-"
"No you won't. If you're smart, drop your name tag in this basket right here, leave, and don't look back. My collection's been running kind of low," Izzy shook a basket full of name tags in the air. Several people lined up, dropped their name tags in, and walked out of the room.
"Seriously? How are we going to expect people to stay if you're fostering such a negative environment?" Tai put his hands on his hips.
"I'm not being negative, just realistic. No point in training or getting invested in people who will drop like flies," Izzy watched as a couple more people dropped their name tags in his basket. "Thanks for coming...good luck at your next job."
"Wow...there goes most of our holiday help. Thanks," Yolei crossed her arms.
"Survival of the fittest. Just getting rid of the weakest links now before they waste more of our time," Izzy shuffled through his basket of name tags and clipped a random one on.
"Can we please stop scaring people away? We need to have all hands on deck, especially since we just a bunch of new floor plans and displays that we have to get done by tomorrow morning!" Tai shook a thick packet in the air.
"What? When did this happen?!" Sarah gasped.
"Uh...so funny story, corporate sent these planograms a couple of weeks ago, but I forgot about it until today! It was buried underneath a stack of resumes...which are now useless. Thanks, asshole," Tai hit Izzy with the large stack of paper.
"Isn't that something that we should have been spreading apart for weeks? There's no way we can get this done in one day!" Thomas protested.
"Normally, this is the maintenance and warehouse crew's responsibility-"
"That's where you're wrong, pal! It's fighting time!" a tough-looking, buff guy aggressively jumped up from his seat, causing the people next to him to flinch.
"Hey, hey, hey, calm down Marcus! I was just about to say...since I know you guys can't do it on your own, I'm asking the rest of you help pitch in! After all teamwork makes the dream work!" Tai nervously chuckled.
"Funny how we always hear that management drops the ball," Kouichi innocently said.
"Don't you know? Us lowly wage slaves are always responsible for any fuck ups that happen, even though it's always management that seems to be doing the fuck ups!" Koji sarcastically gasped.
"Uh, where are we going to find the time to do all of this when we're doing our normal jobs?" Zoe raised her hand.
"Make some time. It's called prioritizing- and if we need to, we'll stay after closing to make sure we get everything done," Yolei began tearing the packet into smaller sections and handed them off to everyone.
"Hey, we didn't get any packets...," Kari whispered to Ken.
"Good. Let's try to sneak out here while we can," Ken smirked.
"Mmmhmm," Kristy nodded.
"Oh and one more thing! Now, because corporate is anticipating a higher volume of shoppers in the next couple of weeks, they have updated our policies on sick time and precautions involving infectious diseases," Tai exclaimed.
"Why do I feel like this isn't going to benefit us in any way?" Izzy crossed his arms in disapproval.
"Oh, it will! It will help boost your immunity!" Tai smiled.
"Ugh...you've got to be kidding me," the rest of the break room broke out in various grumbles.
"Hey!" Yolei pulled a gun out of her back and brandished it.
"Whoa! You're not security! You can't have that here!" Henry gasped.
"It's called crowd control, something your team apparently needs some training on!" Yolei shook her gun at Henry.
"Okay! We get the point, crazy lady!" Rika rolled her eyes.
"Thank you!" Yolei polished her gun on her shirt.
"Sooo...like I was going to say, all we're doing is denying all PTO and sick requests from today into MLK Day! Also if you come down with some illness, just wear one of these masks until you feel better. We're only doing this for barely three months!" Tai held up a paper mask.
"Oh yeah, just enough time to cover the holiday season and the inevitable returns in January. How kind," Ryo smirked.
"But some of us have to handle food directly!" Takato exclaimed.
"Are we also expected to serve food if we're contagious?" Zoe asked.
"That's why you're supposed to wear gloves that we provide you. Also we have handwashing stations that are always supplied with antibacterial soap- at least they should be, right Sarah?!" Yolei asked.
"Our maintenance crew is on top of our duties, so don't think you can shift blame on us for such a ridiculous policy!" Sarah protested.
"That's right! I can blame it on all of you individuals instead! How do I know that each one of you aren't taking correct measures to upkeep a clean environment, if for example you don't wash your hands correctly? Remember, at least 20 seconds with soap and warm water! Oh, and don't forget to wipe down surfaces on a regular basis. After all, staying healthy is a team effort! It only takes one bad apple to ruin the bunch!" Yolei proudly said.
"Guys, I'm sorry that you might not like the new changes, but it's only temporary! Let's just have a positive mindset and focus on having a successful holiday season!" Tai clapped his hands.
"Why? What's in it for us?" Rika snarled.
"If we do good, maybe we can get a pizza party. Isn't that fun?" Yolei stuck her thumbs up and smiled, only to receive a crowd of middle fingers back at her. "Okay...we'll get the pizza from a real pizza place?"
"I'm too old for this...but I'm also too old to get hired anywhere else. If only assisted suicide were legal," Gennai grumbled as he got up from his seat.
"Gennai!" Tai gasped.
"I said what I said," Gennai glared at him and shuffled out of the breakroom.
Sales Floor
"Hey hey hey, say hi to your new seasonal hires Jeremy and Takuya!" Tai dragged two boys over to Sarah and Thomas.
"Oh, hi...my name is Sarah, and this is Thomas," Sarah introduced herself to the boys.
"Wow, your name should be Hot Stuff," one of the boys whistled. He had messy brown hair and wore goggles and work gloves.
"Whoa, watch your mouth there! What are you- fifteen?" Thomas held his hand up.
"Yeah, old enough to know better, young enough to get away with it," the boy winked.
"Can he go elsewhere?" Thomas crossed his arms.
"Sorry, but Takuya's very experienced in maintenance. As you can see, he even brought his own protective gear," Tai said.
"Protection from getting his butt kicked maybe," Thomas grumbled.
"Uh, where did the other one go?" Sarah nervously looked around.
"He probably went to check out the supply closet. He was very enthusiastic about all of the cleaning supplies we use, so he seems like an expert! You guys are going to be in good hands," Tai smiled.
"Oh boy...," Sarah and Thomas exchanged nervous glances with each other.
"Oh, before I forget- one of your main tasks is to change all of the old signs to the new ones, which are waiting for you in the stock room. Since you'll be working at large heights, Marcus from the stock room will help out and he'll accompany one of you with a crane...which I think Thomas would be the best for the job. He's the tallest and oooh, your shoulders are so broad, you must be strong enough to lift up the new signs," Tai squeezed Thomas's shoulder.
"Uh...," Thomas turned red.
"Okay! Sarah, you can take care of the planograms, along with supervising your new crew, right?" Tai pointed the tip of his pen at her.
"I'll do my best," Sarah winced.
"Great! If we have to stay after-hours, it will be all your fault and everyone will be mad at you! Toodles!" Tai hummed and walked off.
"Seriously?" Thomas sighed.
"Ignore him. I guess we just do the best we can..," Sarah sighed.
"I really don't want to work with Marcus. He seems temperamental," Thomas wrung the hem of his shirt.
"Oh, he's not that bad once you get to know him! You'll be fine," Sarah squeezed his arm.
"I hope you're right about this one...," Thomas sighed.
"We should probably get moving. I have to find Jeremy before we end up experiencing something like Breaking Bad or Oppenheimer," Sarah sighed.
"You know, it would be nice if we could experience something more wholesome, like where everyone got along with each other, or were like a big happy family," Thomas said.
"Unfortunately, this isn't a sitcom," Sarah sighed.
Service Desk
"Hi, I'm Meiko and I'll be helping out with gift wrapping," a tall, slender girl with long black hair introduced herself to Ryo and Rika.
"Okay...," Rika raised her eyebrow at her.
"Cool," Ryo shrugged.
"Awesome...," Meiko pressed her lips together in frustration.
"Don't take it personally, it's not like you'll be here past the holiday, right?" Rika yawned.
"I'm not planning on it...," Meiko sheepishly said.
"Well, you'll be wrapping gifts, and processing returns if need be," Rika yawned.
"They want us to upsell the fancier gift wrap but honestly, it doesn't matter. If you're getting something from this store, why would you spend extra money to wrap it?" Rika scoffed.
"I guess you have a point. Are you guys pitching in with gift wrapping as well?" Meiko asked.
"Really?" Ryo tapped on his prosthetic arm.
"Oh, I'm so sorry..," Meiko started to fiddle with a tape dispenser and then contorted her face.
"Uh, you okay?" Ryo asked.
"Achoo!" Meiko sneezed loudly.
"Ugh, disgusting! Didn't anyone tell you to cover your mouth?" Rika grabbed a can of disinfectant spray and shook it in her direction.
"Sorry, I didn't know I was going to snee-aaachoo!" Meiko sneezed again.
"Bro, they stuck us with a walking germ," Ryo groaned.
"I'm sorry...it's just allergies. Do you guys have any tissues?" Meiko sniffled.
"Here," Rika threw a box of tissues at Meiko's head.
"Oh, and take this...just cover yourself in it," Ryo slid a gallon-sized container of hand sanitizer towards Meiko.
"Achooooo!" Meiko sneezed into her hands.
"Ugh...," Rika and Ryo rolled their eyes at each other.
"Sorry," Meiko coughed with her mouth open.
"Whatever," Rika sprayed disinfectant spray in the air.
"Excuse me, I need to make a return," a man meekly walked up to the service desk.
"Sure, what seems to be the problem?" Ryo blankly looked at the man.
"These knives aren't sharp enough. I tried to cut my dead wife up in-"
"Don't care. Do you have a receipt?" Ryo interrupted as he dragged a bloody knife block towards him.
"Yeah, right here," the man fished a receipt out of his pocket.
"Hey, you said you needed sharp *achoo* knives?" Meiko asked.
"Yeah, I need them to cut to the bone," the man said.
"Great, because I have the product for you!" Meiko sniffled as she pulled a pamphlet from her bag. "Here are some state-of-the-art knives, that are so sharp, you won't even feel it if you cut yourself!"
"Oooh, that's sharp," the man exclaimed.
"And because it's the holiday season, if you get the 12 piece culinary set, you get a free set of scissors to go with it too. And it all comes with a lifetime guarantee, so if your blades ever get dull, you can get them sharpened for free," Meiko wiped her nose on her sleeve.
"Oh, sign me up!" the man said. "Hey, gimp! Where's my refund?"
"Uh...here?" Ryo handed him some cash.
"How much are we talking, you walking germ?" the man faced Meiko.
"$1500," Meiko said.
"$1500?! Are you crazy?!" the man screamed.
"Remember, the sharpest knives ever...and a lifetime guarantee!" Meiko nodded.
"Ugh, you are convincing! Fine, do you take Canadian Express?" the man asked.
"Yep! Just tap on the square and fill out the info when prompted. Your knife set will be shipped out to you in a week!" Meiko pulled out a portable credit card reader.
"Wow, thank you!" the man pulled out his credit card.
"No, thank you!" Meiko smiled.
"And no thanks to you...you were very unhelpful," the man sneered at Ryo and Rika.
"Thanks for noticing," Rika stared at him as he walked off.
"Dude, what the hell? I accepted his biohazard of a return, Jeffrey Dahmer! I didn't have to," Ryo scoffed.
"Have a happy *achoo* holiday!" Meiko smiled at the man.
"Dude, what's your deal? You sell overpriced garbage on the side?" Ryo asked.
"It makes a good income. I sell knives, lounge wear, makeup, but my best-seller is self-care," Meiko sniffled.
"Self-care?" Rika raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, it's from South of the Border. There's a lot of products like massage tools, lotions, gels, beachwear," Meiko said.
"Hmmm...," Rika and Ryo exchanged looks with each other.
"Do you have samples of this stuff by the way?" Ryo snickered.
"Yeah! Here's my catalog. Oh, and my most popular item, the Mexican Jumping Bean. It's a portable massager that you can take with you anywhere. They come in fun, bright colors," Meiko pulled out a catalog and two small, bean-shaped vibrating massagers.
"Huh, this is very small," Rika smirked.
"You can take it anywhere," Ryo stuck his tongue out.
"Hey, I bet a lot of other people might like this stuff," Rika smirked.
"Would you guys like to purchase them?" Meiko pulled out her credit card reader.
"Not just yet...we need to test them out, you know for quality purposes," Ryo smirked.
"Yeah, but I bet other people are more of an expert than us. You go ahead," Rika waved her off.
"Okay, you don't mind?" Meiko asked.
"Nah girl, you do your hustle!" Ryo said.
"And hustle your germs away from us," Rika muttered.
"But what about the gift wrap?" Meiko asked.
"No one wraps their gifts here, we'll be fine! Just go," Rika said.
"Okay!" Meiko hopped out of her seat and skipped off.
"Finally, the mucus monster is gone..," Ryo sighed.
"Hey, you thinking what I'm thinking?" Rika held a vibrating bean between her fingers.
"Way ahead of you," Ryo drew a circle on the tabletop. "Vibrating Beyblade course!"
Cafe Europa at Cloud 9
"I think I understand why we didn't get a planogram now," Kristy frantically scribbled names on various coffee cups.
"Sure, the gingerbread cookie latte and peppermint mochas are bringing in crowds, but you weren't here during the pumpkin spice latte season," Kari tapped her fingers against the espresso machine.
"I'd rather take pumpkin spice over this madness," Ken wiped his face with a wet dishrag.
"Did you give someone the wrong order again?" Kari frowned.
"You see, at least with pumpkin spice, everyone wanted the same damn thing. Now that we have two featured flavours, I've been mixing things up, and some people get nasty," Ken sighed.
"Hey asshole! I said gingerbread latte, not peppermint mocha! I HATE CHOCOLATE!"
"Duck!" Ken pulled Kristy and Kari down under the counter.
"Whoa!"
*splash*
"Okay, we need to come up with a better system...," Kari sighed.
"Agreed. I didn't sign up for getting second degree burns," Kristy frowned.
"CAKE POPS NOW!"
Toy Section
"Jeri, Tommy! Where are you?" Yolei whistled.
"Coming!" Jeri dropped a stuffed animal to the ground.
"What's going on?" Tommy stammered.
"Meet your new Santa!" Yolei shoved a large boy in a blue jumpsuit in front of them.
"What?! When did this happen?!" the large boy gasped.
"Not to question your authority, but how is he supposed to be Santa? Don't you think he's a little too young to be Santa?" Jeri asked.
"But he's got the right look!" Yolei pinched his arm.
"Uh...you mean he's fat?" Tommy asked.
"Tommy!" Jeri gasped.
"Correctomundo!" Yolei winked.
"Oh my god, that's so mean!" Jeri exclaimed.
"But that doesn't stop it from being true, right Tubby?" Yolei poked the large boy in the gut.
"Hey, is that really why you hired me? I thought you liked my personality!" the boy whined.
"I doooo...your personality is a lot like Santa's in the way that you're both...fat?" Yolei shrugged.
"Yolei!" Jeri gasped.
"Look, you were the only guy who could fit the Santa costume. Now do you still want the job?" Yolei tapped her foot impatiently.
"I guess," the boy frowned.
"Good! I don't see why you had to make a mountain out of a molehill then, Jeri...no one had a problem with this except you," Yolei shot her a dirty look.
"I'm sorry," Jeri's face fell.
"Okay, Chubby... I'll be back with your costume! All you have to do is park your ass at the Santa station and have kids sit on your lap and pretend you care when they tell you what they want for Christmas. Oh, and no cursing. Apparently that's what happened at other stores, and I want to tell them to suck it when I have a perfect Santa! Just hang tight!" Yolei winked and dashed off.
"Is she always like this?" the large kid nervously said.
"Yeah...," Jeri sighed.
"I'm JP by the way," JP nervously stuck his hand out.
"I'm Jeri," Jeri gave him a handshake.
"I'm Tommy," Tommy waved at him.
"I have a question. Do you like it here?" JP whispered.
"No. Not at all, but it beats getting beat at home," Jeri shook her head.
"Uh huh...," JP pulled a chocolate bar out of his pocket and broke a piece off.
"Hey, can I have a piece?" Tommy asked.
"Well, I only brought enough for me- I guess I could share," JP pouted as he broke apart a piece of candy for Tommy.
"Thank you!" Tommy outstretched his hand.
"You want a piece too?" JP reluctantly asked Jeri.
"I didn't want to impose, but if you're offering...," Jeri bashfully said.
"Sure...," JP sighed.
Jewellery and Cosmetics
"And as you can see, this shade really brings out your color," Mimi applied a lipstick onto an older lady.
"Oooh, I really like this sweetie. What is this shade called?" the old lady smiled.
"Uh...Pink Taco," Mimi blushed.
"Oh, that sounds pretty," the old lady gushed. "Oh honey, I think someone looks like they need you!"
"Um, can I help you?" Mimi put her hands on her hips.
"Actually, I can help you! *Achoo*!" Meiko sneezed in her hand.
"How?" Mimi looked at her in disgust.
"Excuse me, Miss! But do you know how much that lipstick costs?" Meiko walked over to the older lady.
"What are you doing?" Mimi said through gritted teeth.
"That is $45! And do you know how naughty the name is?" Meiko asked the older woman.
"Excuse me?" the woman asked.
"Yeah, Pink Taco is another term for...," Meiko whispered in the woman's ear.
"What?!" the woman turned red. "Is that true?!"
"I-I-I...I don't know what this girl is telling you, but she's got to be a pervert!" Mimi gasped.
"No! If you want a moral lipstick for half the price, check out this similar shade called Kitten Paws," Meiko pulled out a tube of lipstick.
"I like kittens," the old lady smiled.
"And it has 12-hour long lasting wear, and with every tube of lipstick you purchase, a half-percent of proceeds go to the CEO's daughter, who is in rehab," Meiko sniffled.
"Get out of here, slimer...I'll get the Ghostbusters on your ass," Mimi clenched her jaw.
"Oh, I would like that. I'll get one of these. Sorry, but I can't buy such a sinful product," the old lady gave Mimi a disapproving look.
"I understand," Mimi coughed.
"I accept cards or cash," Meiko smiled at the older lady.
"Blech," Mimi walked away and grimaced.
"Hey, nerd got your tongue?" TK smirked.
"I wish. I haven't seen him all day," Mimi huffed.
"Huh?" Davis snuck up behind Mimi.
"I was talking about that tall girl with the glasses?" TK cocked his head to the side.
"Ugh, hate her...she's a gross *achoo* slimeball and she's stealing my customers!" Mimi covered her sneeze with her elbow.
"Whoa! Germs!" Davis jumped back.
"I know, she's icky!" Mimi huffed.
"I don't think she's the only one right now," TK slipped a face mask on.
"I just lost a sale because she pushed a stupid Carrie Mae lipstick onto an older lady. I almost got my quota for the day, and that bitch ruined it with her crappy, cheap makeup. I hope everyone gets an allergic reaction from it," Mimi sniffled.
"I'd be careful if I were you...being hateful isn't good for your health," Davis began to cough.
"Or being surrounded by hateful people. We should get going," TK winced.
"Good call...I think I have to use the bathroom actually," Davis immediately sprinted to the bathroom.
Grocery
"Hey, we could use an extra hand at Cafe Europa! We have samples...," Kari walked around with a tray of small espresso cups.
"Oooh, I could-"
"Sorry, this offer is only available to Cloud 9 employees," Kari shooed a customer's hand away.
"Bitch," the customer grumbled.
"Uh...," Kari gasped.
"Hey you! Stop trying to poach our workers!" Zoe smacked a spatula against the deli counter.
"I'm not poaching! Besides, I wouldn't be in this situation if you didn't quit," Kari frowned.
"I did what's best for me. Maybe if you hate it there, you should consider crossing over to the blue side too," Zoe haughtily tugged at her blue vest.
"Dude, it doesn't even matter. Blue, green...we're all working at the same place. It all sucks either way," Koji said as he sliced ham.
"You know what? I'll find someone else," Kari nervously said.
"Don't go just yet...I do have some dead weights here," Zoe glared at Koji. "We'll trade you one of ours for one of yours."
"That's a deal," Kari smiled.
"Hey!" the boys yelled in unison.
"Okay, take Koji," Zoe said.
"What?! I didn't agree to this!" Koji protested.
"I thought that this place sucked no matter if you worked at the cafe or at the grocery," Zoe smirked.
"I don't want to make coffee for 8 hours straight though!" Koji exclaimed.
"If I have to take Koji, you're taking Ken!" Kari yelled.
"Whoa, if you have to take me? What does that mean?" Koji crossed his arms.
"I take back my offer! Ken really sucks at basically everything!" Zoe ignored Koji.
"Well duh! Why else do you think I'm scouting for people?" Kari exclaimed.
"No deal! Go bark up someone else's tree!" Zoe chucked a piece of bologna at Kari.
"Ahhh! Leaving!" Kari jumped.
"Hey, did you say you needed *achoo* help at the cafe?" Meiko walked up to Kari.
"Uh, I think I'm fine. I guess all signs are pointing to no," Kari winced and stepped back.
"Oh, I don't want to work at the cafe, but I think I have something that could make your work flow easier. It's an instant coffee that tastes comparable to the Cafe Europa holiday drinks- but with added proteins and weight-loss supplements," Meiko pulled a big plastic bin out from a satchel.
"Uh...," Kari pursed her lips.
"Oh yeah, just one scoop of this and put it in the microwave, and you have a gourmet drink that's even better than the $7 lattes that you guys sling for hours," Meiko coughed.
"How much?" Kari hesitantly asked.
"$235 for this bin- it yields 120 servings," Meiko smiled.
"Fine, just follow me to the cafe. The money's in the register," Kari sighed and coughed.
Stock Room
"Yeah, so these are the new signs that they want us to put up. I don't know why, they look exactly the same as the ones already hanging up in the ceiling," Marcus slapped a pallet of signs.
"There has to be a difference if they sent out a whole new set though, right?" Thomas rubbed his chin.
"Have you ever worked retail before?" Marcus rolled his eyes.
"I see...," Thomas pressed his lips together.
"Let's put up one sign and if it looks close enough to the original, then we'll just throw away the rest of these signs," Marcus shrugged.
"I don't know if that's a good-"
"We do not get paid enough to care whether the job is done correctly. Always remember that," Marcus pulled a carton of cigarettes from his shirt pocket and slapped it against the palm of his hand a couple of times. "You want?"
"No thank you," Thomas shook his head.
"I admire that, SpongeBob," Marcus lit up his cigarette.
"SpongeBob?" Thomas asked.
"You know, SpongeBob SquarePants? The little sponge who lives in a pineapple under the sea?" Marcus bounced in place.
"I have no idea...," Thomas shook his head.
"The cartoon?" Marcus threw his hands up in the air.
"I've actually never watched cartoons in my life," Thomas rubbed his arm.
"Whoa, are you a serial killer, or you just live under a rock?" Marcus shot him a look.
"I guess you could say that...," Thomas turned red.
"Which one?" Marcus asked.
"Well, the answer is obvious, right?" Thomas nervously laughed.
"No. It isn't," Marcus squinted, examining him.
Toy Section
"Wow, the toy department is really busy! That's so good for numbers, hopefully people buy a lot of toys this holiday season!" Tai exclaimed.
"I wouldn't get our hopes up...I think we hired a Santa who might be too good at his job," Yolei winced.
"Huh? What do you mean by that? Isn't that supposed to be a good thing?" Tai gave her a puzzled look.
"Tai, check out the line...do you see any kids?" Yolei asked.
"Oh...no, I don't. What's going on?" Tai frowned.
"I don't know, but this is weird. We have to get to the bottom of this," Yolei put her hands on her hips.
"Yeah, this is definitely weird," Tai walked over to the Santa station.
"And then on Thanksgiving, my dad said this is my new mom...I didn't ask for a new mom. I wanted my old mom, but he said he didn't sleep with prostitutes who were older than 30," Jeri said as she sat on JP's lap.
"Uh huh...," JP looked uneasy.
"Hey, everything going alright here?" Tai tapped JP on the shoulder.
"Yeah! JP's a great Santa! I don't know how to explain this, but I almost feel like he's giving this loving energy, like he cares about what I'm saying!" Jeri smiled.
"Help!" JP mouthed.
"Jeri, how long have you been trauma dumping on this guy? You know there's a five-minute limit at Santa's Workshop, and you have to be 12 or under," Tai put his hands on his hips.
"Oh...," Jeri's face fell.
"You're holding up the line. Uppies," Tai clapped his hands.
"Okay...," Jeri frowned and climbed down.
"Uh, here's a chocolate for the road," JP pulled a chocolate bar out of his costume pocket.
"Thanks," Jeri let out a small smile and awkwardly walked down the Christmas set.
"Alright everyone! Anyone waiting for Santa who is 12-years-old and under, please wait in line! Everyone else, please get out of line! This is for kids only!" Tai yelled.
"Huh, the crowd's gone," Tommy remarked.
"What the hell?" Tai frowned.
"Maybe it's because people want to wish for items in these magazines this girl is handing out. I think she works at the front desk," Tommy said.
"What?! Someone's selling items...items that we don't sell in store, here?!" Tai growled.
"Yeah! Not going to lie, but I kinda want this electric cheese grater from the Spoiled Chef. I don't cook, but it grates and slices cheese, and I like cheese," JP pulled out a catalog.
"Freaking Rika...," Tai grumbled.
Sales Floor
"Hey boys!" Sarah walked up to Marcus and Thomas.
"Hi Sarah, is everything okay?" Thomas asked.
"Oh, it's so busy here! I'm trying to catch up with disinfecting the store, but I don't think I'm fast enough. I think people are already catching a little cold, but this one girl was selling immunity shots, so I bought some and thought you could use some. We could all be ahead of the curve," Sarah held up small bottles.
"Thanks, you're always watching out for us like a momma bear!" Marcus grabbed a bottle and chugged it in one shot.
"Anything for my cubs," Sarah smiled as she rubbed Marcus on the shoulder.
"Uh, I don't think these are regulated by the FDA," Thomas read the nutrition label.
"Dude, but did you see all of the vitamins in them? We'll be super healthy! For centuries at this point," Marcus flexed his arm.
"It doesn't hurt to give it a try," Sarah slowly sipped at her drink until it was empty.
"I don't think that's how it works...," Thomas looked at his bottle.
"Oh. I'm sorry...I should have asked first before I got one for you," Sarah bit her nail.
"No! It's fine. I mean, what's the worst that could truly happen?" Thomas sheepishly opened his bottle and reluctantly drank from it.
"Wasn't that refreshing?" Sarah smiled.
"I feel healthy already!" Marcus exclaimed.
"I feel something for sure," Thomas gripped onto his chest.
"Hey, are you ready to go hang up a sign now?" Marcus nudged Thomas.
"I guess," Thomas nodded.
"Okay. You'll have to hang it up, because only I'm certified to operate the cranes. Maybe if you take the classes, you can be certified too, but for now, I'll have to take control of the cranes. So hop into that basket," Marcus tapped on the basket.
"Uh huh...," Thomas nodded slowly.
"Buddy, you sure you're okay to do it?" Marcus asked.
"Yeah... I'm just a little scared of heights right now. I'm not normally scared of them, but I am right now. I don't know why, but I can feel my heart beat through my palms," Thomas leaned onto the basket of the crane.
"Huh, I think I can help you out. Here, just take two puffs of this," Marcus pulled out a vape pen.
"What's this?" Thomas held the vape pen between his fingers.
"Uhhh...an inhaler? It's just a sleek design," Marcus winced.
"Okay," Thomas brought it to his lips and coughed. "I don't feel any better ye...okay. It's do or die," Thomas wiped his hands on his pants.
"Good, cause you're probably the tallest guy we can get to do the job. Tai and Yolei are fucking useless," Marcus scoffed.
"Okay, I'm ready," Thomas outstretched his arms.
"Here's a sign. Hold on to it," Marcus handed a sign over to him and then went to lift the crane.
"Whoa... I'm really high. Wait...am I really high? Like not high on the ground, but high?" Thomas's eyes grew big.
"You doing okay?" Marcus shouted from the ground.
"Uh huh...," Thomas froze.
"Okay, then switch the signs!" Marcus yelled.
"Uhhhh...," Thomas paused.
"Hey! What's taking you guys so long! Have you guys hung up any signs yet?!" Yolei yelled.
"We were getting to it! See?!" Marcus shouted.
"Uh oh...," Thomas dropped the sign to the ground.
"Aaahhhh! You almost killed me!" Yolei dodged out of the way.
"It's not too late. You do have the other sign to take out," Marcus shouted.
"Ugh...," Thomas hung over the crane basket.
"Dude, are you okay?" Marcus yelled.
"He looks like he's about to ralph!" Yolei shrieked.
"Bleeeechhhh...," Thomas threw up.
"Oh, nasty!" Marcus cackled.
"Ugh, I got it all over me!" Yolei screamed.
"It looks like clam chowder," Marcus laughed as he brought Thomas back down to the floor.
"I am...so...sorry," Thomas wiped off the vomit from his mouth.
"Explain yourself! What is this?!" Yolei's face turned red.
"Oh my goodness! What is that smell?" Marcus grimaced.
"Vomit?" Yolei growled.
"No...it's kind of chemically," Marcus's eyes began to water.
"Hey! I just found Jeremy, and long story short, we need to clear out the store!" Sarah ran up to everyone, dragging a young boy with her.
"What?!" Yolei growled.
"This little genius was playing chemist in the supply closet!" Sarah twisted the boy's ear.
"Oww, oww, owwie!" the boy kicked and bucked.
"Unbelievable," Yolei huffed. "Alright, let me page everyone. Just get out."
Front Desk
"What? I'm heading there now!" Tai grumbled into his walkie talkie.
"Noooo, get back in the circle!" Ryo flailed his arms in the air.
"Hey, what are you guys doing?" Tai yelled.
"We're playing Beyblade, what does it look like to you?" Rika scoffed.
"It looks like you're playing with...uh, you know," Tai winced.
"Yes?" Ryo smirked.
"Do I have to say it? Where did you even get those?" Tai turned red.
"That weird girl who sneezes on everything! By the way, you should do something about her. She was just soooo thrilled to give these to us," Rika shrugged.
"Hah! I knocked you out of the arena! Who's the loser now?" Ryo laughed.
*buzzzz* a small bean-shaped massager fell to the floor.
"Dammit, you distracted me!" Rika yelled.
"Oh my god, oh my god! I can't with this right now!" Tai hyperventilated.
"Why are you here anyways?" Rika asked.
"We have to clear out the building. One of the new kids mixed a bunch of cleaning supplies and made some toxic gas," Tai said.
"Oh. Cool. Cause dying at a shitty retail job has always been a dream of mine," Ryo droned.
*buzzzzzz*
Cafe Europa at Cloud 9
"Excuse me, young man! Are you the manager?" an old man tugged Izzy by the sleeve of his shirt.
"Depends. What is the issue?" Izzy sighed.
"My latte tastes powdery, and not like a coffee," the old man held up his coffee cup.
"I'm so sorry about that. I am going to see what's going on...," Izzy grabbed the man's drink and moved his way to the register.
"Hey, no cutting!" a line of people whined.
"I'm the manager! Just be patient!" Izzy yelled. "Kari! Hey!"
"Hey...black coffee?" Kari innocently held up a carafe.
"Kari, I've been getting several complaints about coffee tasting 'powdery', and normally I don't want to deal with this because the cafe is outside of my realm, but this is weird. What is going on?" Izzy asked.
"About that...Ken is having a hard time *achoo* keeping up with demand, so we *achoo* decided to find a way to make things a little easier," Kari held up a large canister of protein powder under the counter.
"What is that?" Izzy asked.
"It's supposed to *achoo* be like an instant coffee that supposedly tastes like our holiday drinks," Kari coughed.
"Have you thought to give it a try first before you handed it out to customers? Here, try it now," Izzy handed her the old man's coffee.
"Do I have to?" Kari winced.
"I highly advise you do," Izzy crossed his arms.
"Uh...," Kari gingerly brought the coffee cup to her lips and took a small sip. "Ugh! Gross!"
"Where did you get this? I highly doubt that this is a Cafe Europa product," Izzy tapped his fingers across the tabletop.
"It was from one of the seasonal helpers...I just needed something quick. Nobody wanted to trade workers with Ken...I mean, frankly he's not good at this job," Kari whispered.
*BEEP BEEP BEEP*
"Attention Cloud 9 shoppers, this is an impromptu fire drill! Please calmly exit at the front entrance as we clear out the building! Thank you!"
"Hurry, some asshat decided to mix a bunch of cleaning products together, so run, run, run as fast as you can before your insides burn out!"
"What's going on?" the line of customers started looking around at each other scared.
"Rika! We're supposed to pretend to be calm!"
"Alright everyone! Like the announcement said, let's please leave in an orderly fashion. We have an emergency exit right by the corner!" Izzy yelled.
"Ahhhhh!" customers started pushing each other out of the way and trampling over each other.
"Saved by the bell," Kari coughed.
"We'll continue this conversation later," Izzy sternly shot Kari a look.
"I guess we're not off the hook yet," Kristy muttered.
"Ahhhhh!"
Parking Lot
"Is everyone here?" Tai yelled.
"Looks it," Zoe sneezed into a tissue.
"Lovely, I love that we get to have our after-shift meeting in a parking lot...out in the cold...with our stuff still inside our lockers because the fire department says it's still not safe to enter the building," Yolei shivered.
"Well, let's give a round of our applause to our holiday help for that. Jeremy, Meiko. Come to the front of the crowd!" Tai motioned them over.
"This doesn't seem like it's a good thing," Jeremy rubbed his ear.
"Oh, cause it's not. Get up there, buddy," Marcus kicked him in the back.
"The two of you single-handedly destroyed our store. I think you guys were even worse than Ken Ichijoji, and that was a low I didn't think was achievable," Tai exclaimed.
"Come on, seriously?" Ken groaned.
"Meiko, you infected half of the store with your sick germs, and you were selling your garbage products! We're supposed to be selling Cloud 9 stock!" Tai yelled.
"But I *achoo* actually get a commission when I sell the other stuff," Meiko sneezed in the air.
"Gross!" everyone jumped back.
"And Jeremy, you scare me. You should be arrested for chemical warfare. That being said, your badges have been deactivated, and you'll get your pay checks in the mail, minus any deductions for damages caused. Adios!" Tai yelled.
"Jeremy, you can drop your tag here," Izzy shook his basket of name tags.
"What about me?" Meiko sniffled.
"Burn it...," Izzy grimaced.
"Alright! Anything else we'd like to discuss before we have to call Ubers home and break into our houses because our stuff again is in the lockers, which we cannot get to?" Yolei put her hands on her hips.
"Why am I still alive?" Gennai groaned.