The Agony of Forgiveness

by Raza Mao

When a young girl finds herself in a familiar setting, she must assume the mantle of a Guardian. Her journey of self discovery and perseverance is put to the test. Does she have the will to fight on? Or will she succumb to the overwhelming pressure of her duty.

5. 4) The Sky Watch

We landed near the place I slayed the archon. Feeling my feet touch solid ground, I readied my weapon. "Do you know where we're headed, Ghost?" I asked.

"The SkyWatch is just on the other side Steppes. Aaaand it's surrounded by Fallen. Well, I'm ready if you are."

I shook my head with a slight chuckle and began my trek to the Steppes. Along the way, Ghost and I encountered more Fallen causing a disturbance in the Cosmodrome. I shot my scout rifle, getting better and better with each squeeze of the trigger.

"You know, this place must've been amazing before the Collapse. Thousands of humans boarding the colony ships, off to build cities beyond..."

It was a weird feeling being out here. These things... The enemies. The Fallen. They all felt as if they were just bits of code and numbers to me. But to Ghost and the rest of humanity, they were a real threat. A vicious species that were clawing away at humanity. To them, each kill was another Fallen gone. To me? It still felt like a game. But I couldn't tell Ghost that.

"Hana..." At least, I definitely couldn't tell him that. But the way I felt definitely was not hidden from him.

"I know. I know. It's just... I still haven't felt the weight of it all, yet." I admitted freely. "I still want to go home. I want to know how my dad is doing and being here and doing this is just making me feel like I'm not in the right place." I loaded a new magazine into my scout rifle and continued on. "But trust me when I say that even if it doesn't feel real to me, I am still going to do my best to help everyone out. That's what a Guardian is supposed to do, right?" I said.

"Right you are, Hana." Ghost replied with a bright tone in his voice.

We kept on our path, taking more Fallen out as we approached a building I haven't seen before. "Up the hill. The giant tower with the radar. That's the Skywatch." Ghost said.

"Got it. Up we go!" I climbed up the hill and took out more Fallen that were guarding the entry way. "Damn... It seriously seems like they don't want us to get anywhere near this place." I said.

"All the more reason to see what they're hiding. Come on. Let's see what we can find."

I made my way inside, more rusted walls and beams surrounded me as I dived deeper into the building. "We're in. This was one of Skywatch's old array stations; a link to the lunar colonies." Ghost said.

"They really colonized the moon, huh?" I asked. I knew that 'Destiny' was a science fiction game, but it still felt so surreal to think that I might be heading up to the moon and planets beyond. It gave me a sense of wonder and dread to see what was out there.

"Yup. It must have been amazing, Hana." Ghost said with a somber voice.

I could feel Ghost's lament at talking about the moon colonies. I wanted to question him a bit more about it, but before I could, we found ourselves face to face with a dead end.

Ghost came out and scanned all over the place. "Locked. But I can get it open." Shooting a beam at the control panel of the door, it took a few seconds for Ghost to finish. "The Fallen really didn't want anyone getting in. Or out..."

"Or out...? That seems a bit ominous, Ghost." I said, readying my scout rifle. Looking at the top left corner of my vision, I saw a few blinks of read, signaling movement. Before I could comment on it, the door opened and revealed a pathway with... green spikes and debris scattered all over the place.

"What is this...? Lots of movement ahead. I've got a bad feeling about this."

"You and me both, buddy." I said continuing up the stairs. Once my radar began going off the fritz, I really began to get worried. "Umm, Ghost? This ain't normal, is it?" I asked.

"No. It isn't..." We entered a dark area and Ghost came out to shine the light in front of me. All of a sudden, a weird and honestly creepy looking humanoid husk started to run towards me. "The Hive!"

I didn't ask questions. I didn't even steady myself in that moment. I was panicking and just began to empty my magazine in my scout rifle. I shot husk after husk, wondering what the hell I was fighting against.

"Ghost! I- AGH!" I was fired by another humanoid husk that seemed to have armor on them instead of the pale nakedness the previous husk had. They were all around me and they were coming at me in a swarm.

I relentlessly shot at them, hoping that I could make some breathing room, but it was not slowing any time soon. Thinking on my feet, I grabbed Ghost and shone him in front of me.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" Ghost said in protest.

"Not now! Gotta get us out of here, but I can't see!" I said. I climbed up some stairs and when I could finally seem some light, I let Ghost go back into... REMINDER: Ask Ghost where he goes when he dissapears.

Regardless of where he went, the room was still full of Hive. Whatever they were, I was scared of them and it seemed like Ghost was too. "A Wizard! You have to kill it!" Ghost yelled at me.

Whatever was in the room looked the same to me. Enemies that looked like dried out husks, but one of them stood out. A levitating husk with long robes. I was guessing that was the Wizard.

Doing my best to clear out some of the Hive that were surrounding me, I barely managed to dodge some blasts the Wizard sent my way. I threw a grenade, hoping that it would set her ablaze, but something I saw made my stomach sink. "It's still alive?"

The Wizard was not happy with that attack. It swooped towards me, fast. I barely managed to leap out of the way, but not before getting swiped by it. It must have been strong because when I looked at the top of my vision, the indicator for my overshield dropped to nearly broken.

I darted around the room, dodging the Wizard's attacks. "I gotta find something, fast!"

"Hana! Over there by the broken shelf!"

"Which one? They're all broken!"

"10 o' clock!"

I darted my vision to the left and saw what Ghost pointed at. "I hope this thing's loaded!"

Diving towards the large weapon, I quickly grabbed it and located the trigger. Aiming it at the Wizard, I squeezed. "Eat this!"

A rocket was released from the large weapon I held. It felt similar to holding a 2x4 over your shoulder, but instead of light planks, it was a large hunk of metal and firepower.

The rocket flew behind me and in a deadpanned way, Ghost, the Wizard and I saw it explode off in the distance. "Wrong way, wrong way!" Ghost yelled at me.

"I know, I'm trying to salvage this and you're being a bit of a nuisance!" I yelled back.

The Wizard swooped towards me as I managed to orientate the rocket in the correct direction.

Fearing that I would get caught in the blast, I had to make a quick decision. As the Wizard dived me, I fell backward and used my legs to block the Wizard's attack. Feeling my back land and my feet firmly planted on the Wizard's torso, I pushed it away with all my might.

The Wizard was pushed back a safe distance and in the same instance, I fired my rocket one more time. It flew towards it and in a loud roar of light, the Wizard's body was completely exploded, causing fluids and debris to splatter all over the room.

Some got on my vizor and seeing how viscous it was, it made me cringe. "Ew ew ew ew! Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!"

Ghost manifested from... okay no seriously, REMINDER: ask Ghost where he pops up from. "Wow... That was... intense."

"Yeah and disgusting..." I said finally wiping off the liquid from my vizor. "What the hell were they? Hive?" I asked.

"The Hive. An ancient race, Hana. They're a massive threat to Humanity... They haven't been on Earth in centuries!"

"Wait, wait, wait. So you're telling me we're fighting against more than just the Fallen?" I ask, slumping down onto my knees.

"Yes, and the way things are looking, this is a Hive nesting ground. It isn't safe here. We should probably get moving." Ghost said.

"Right... I think we should..." I picked up my new rocket launcher and stowed it on my back. Thinking on it now, there were a few instances where I saw my dad fighting against these creatures back when I saw him playing the game. One of the Hive stood out in particular to me. I shudder remembering what it was and hope that I don't come across it before I could get out of here.

Being transmatted back to the safety of our ship, I heard Ghost speak up.

"The vanguard's reporting that Fallen are tearing into machines all over the Cosmodrome. I'm starting to think they aren't just looting the place."

"There's still stuff left to loot?"

"Yeah, and the weird thing is that they're also transmitting something off in the distance... Near the Forgotten Shore." Ghost said.

"And where's that?"

"Still in this area, but it's a ways away. It'll take a while if we go by foot... Hmm. If you want to get your sparrow, we could be there in seconds."

"What's a sparrow?"

I always remember the times my dad would egg me on and tease me whenever it came to carnival rides. I always loved the spinning teacups and the Ferris wheels. They were some of my favorite rides.

But when it came to the more extreme rides, my dad would always egg me on and tease me about them. I was never the best when it came to those kind of rides, and even to this day they make me feel queezy.

And that's why this sparrow was making me feel incredibly scared. "GHOST! I DON'T WANT TO BE A GUARDIAN ANYMORE!"

True to his word, this 'sparrow' was going at a blistering speed. The rusty and barren dunes of the Cosmodrome zipped past me as I sped onwards towards the Forgotten Shore.

"We're approaching the Shore." Ghost said.

"Good! Then I can finally get off this thing!"

"Hana, you'll get used to it." Ghost said in a deadpanned voice. "Hmm the Fallen are using some sort of signal amplifiers. Let's see what they're transmitting."

Approaching an abandoned boat, I parked the sparrow in a little alcove and made my way to the top of the boat. Seeing the large transmitter, I let Ghost do his thing. "Give me a second."

While he was scanning it, I thought I heard some classical music playing, but I couldn't pinpoint where it was coming from.

"Some kind of distorted signal. Not Fallen. Let's check the other one." Ghost said.

With a sigh, I hopped back onto my sparrow and followed the marker on my HUD. It was some sort of dilapidated building. I followed the same protocol, slaying Fallen on the way before I found the transmitter. Summoning Ghost again, he did the beam thingy and again the music played.

"Where is that coming from?" I asked.

"Somewhere in Skywatch. Let's check it out." Ghost said.

Dreadfully, I got back onto my sparrow and sped on my way towards The Skywatch. Along the way, I spoke to Ghost to keep my mind off the speed.

"Ghost, I've gotta ask something. That little beam you do whenever we get to doors or something. What exactly are you doing?"

"Well Hana... It's sort of complicated."

"Hmm maybe dumb it down for me, then."

"Well, anytime I do that, I'm actively figuring out and reading billions upon billions of lines of code. I take that code and lay it out in an understandable language for myself and from there, I pinpoint and analyze the specific lines of code that are pertinent to me. Once that is figured out, I use that line of code to bypass any and all firewall that may be in the way and that leads me to another set of code. From there, I can analyze and figure out what I want and read it back as a describable and coherent piece of code. This lets me use that code as anything I want. It can be a code to unlock a door or a password to get information out of anything I need."

I stared ahead, dumbfounded even by that easier explenation.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"It lets me hack stuff."

"That's neat!"

We didn't share another word until I parked my sparrow and entered The Skywatch.

The building itself was about the same as all the other buildings found on the Cosmodrome. Old, rusted, dilapidated. Seems like the collapse did a huge number on this place.

I crawled inside, taking care of any Fallen that were in the way. Although I lost my fusion rifle, I still had my scout rifle that was putting in work and my rocket launcher made clearing out Fallen in the hallways much easier.

Once we found ourselves in a large and open room, I looked around and saw what might be important. I headed over to it and summoned Ghost out.

"The Fallen are trying to access these machines. But something is fighting back?"

"Wait, these thingies can fight back?"

"That's what's so curious... This will take some time, Hana."

"Wait, you normally do all of those other hacks so quickly. Why is this one taking longer?"

"Well, whenever I have to scan these codes, it takes a while to-"

Before Ghost could finish his explanation, movement was pinged on my radar. "Ten words or less, Ghost!" I said, readying my rifle.

"Way more codes than the others and something's fighting back!"

I began to protect Ghost as he commenced his hacking. The Fallen were numerous but I had gotten better and better at fighting them.

I jumped down and began shooting the dregs and shanks that appeared, saving the vandals for my knife. One nearly sliced into me but I dexterously dodged it as I threw a grenade at it.

I looked away as it was consumed in solar light. Seeing more and more Fallen running towards me, I called out to Ghost. "How much longer, Ghost?"

"Almost got it, Hana. Give me a little more time..."

Grunting, I began to make some breathing room for myself as I blew up the entrance where some Fallen were taking cover. Suffering a few bumps and bullets here and there, I managed to keep my overshield in check.

It seemed that my overshield was indeed powered by the light, but Ghost was the one who made it come back to full. I had to manage that stupid bar telling me I was nearly out of overshield carefully.

Another wave of Fallen came out and I struggled to take them out. I was reloading when another bullet flew by and finally broke my overshield. Before I could collect myself, another stay bullet nearly hit me. Ducking in time, I shot the last few Fallen before I hear Ghost call out.

"Done!"

Making sure the area was clear, I headed over to Ghost. "I've pulled out everything they managed to steal. We should destroy this thing."

"Got it." Unloading the rest of my magazine into the machine, it began to spark and fizzle out until the lights and everything were no more.

"Did they get anything important?" I asked.

"They didn't get much; kept hitting an active firewall. Old Earth, Russian."

"Russian...?" I said.

Suddenly Ghost sparked up delighted. "The legends are true! A Warmind did survive the Collapse!"

"What the heck is a Warmind?" I asked.

"An AI built to defend Earth. He faced the Darkness, and survived... He's protecting something here in the Cosmodrome. We have to find a way to reach him..."

"Wait, he? As in, a person?"

"Well, technically speaking. I'm an AI and you gender me, right?"

"Right..." I said a little bashful. "Sorry about that."

"It's okay. Anyway, his name is Rasputin and if we can somehow talk to him, he might be able to help us against the Darkness! This is incredible! We have to report this to the vanguard." Ghost said.

"Alright. Bring the ship around, please. It's time to get out of here..."

The things we reported back to the vanguard must have been shocking to say the least. Commander Zavala simply stared at me in disbelief while Ikora and Cayde were busy trying to form words.

"Rasputin lives?" Zavala said, finally making the conversation a bit more coherent.

"Yes, Commander. We have proof and from the information we got, he is somewhere out in the Cosmodrome. As for where he might be hiding, that is yet to be determined." Ghost said.

"Interesting... If we can somehow make contact, we could get Rasputin to aid humanity again. We might be able to finally make a push against the Darkness." Zavala took in a deep breath and smiled as he nodded his head. "Well done, Guardian."

The way he said 'Guardian' made me blush in pride. "Thank you, Commander." I said.

"This is great! Finding an Warmind AI will be incredibly beneficial to the Guardians. All of that Golden Age tech just waiting for us to learn from..." Ikora said.

This caught me a little curious so I pressed on. "Golden Age tech?"

"Yes, Hana. The Golden Age is what it sounds like, a prosperous and amazing era in human history. Technology was evolving at an astronomical rate. The breakthroughs that were made during this time were unfathomable!" Ghost said.

"So that means... Rasputin is part of this Golden Age tech stuff?" I asked.

"Not only that, as a Warmind, he was in charge of protecting humanities colonies among the solar system." Ikora said.

"Then Rasputin might have a way to get me back home!" The moment I blurted that out I wanted to take my words back. "I-I mean, protect our home..."

The vanguard and Ghost stared at me before Cayde managed to save my butt. "Look at that, kiddo. Already thinking of us like family, ey?" Although it was a bit of a rush job, Cayde did manage to make it a bit convincing.

"Well then, there a few things to take care of before you get sent out on your next mission, Hana." Ikora said. "The Speaker wishes to talk with you. After that, we have one of our on duty staff to show you to your new living quarters. And after that, it seems that we would need to assign you to a fireteam."

"A fire team? L-like other Guardians?" I asked.

"Yes. Some Guardians go out and do missions by themselves, but it's always good to have a fireteam on back up call. Of course, since you're a new light, you'd be under their call." Ghost said.

"W-with all due respect, Ikora. I would like to postpone that for now. I'm still new to being a Guardian, and I don't doubt that having a team would make feel more like a Guardian, but right now I just want to spend some time with Ghost. It seems like I'm barely getting to know him."

"Hana..." If Ghost could blush, I'm sure he'd be glowing a shade of pink right now.

"Very well. Once you are ready, we can assign you a fireteam, Hana. Ghost, please take her to go see The Speaker. Once you're done there, you are free to rest up for the day. It seems you have been very busy since you were resurrected." Ikora said.

"Thank you very much. If there's anything else you need me to do, I will do my best." I said. With that, I left the vanguard headquarters and made my way towards The Speaker.

"So, who is this 'Speaker', Ghost?" I asked. "Is he like the head honcho around here?"

"In a manner of speaking, yes. Pardon the pun, but I just had to." Ghost said giggling.

Before long, we made our way to an observatory of sorts. I looked up in amazement before I heard a voice calling out to me. "There was a time... when we were much more powerful..."

I turned my head to see a man dressed nearly in all white with a black hood. He had on a mask so I couldn't see his face, but his voice was deep with a regal sense to it. "Until it wakes and finds its voice, I am the one who speaks for the Traveler."

I looked away and saw the Traveler through the hole in the observatory.

"You must have no end of questions, Guardian. In it's dying breath, the Traveler created the Ghosts, to seek out those who can wield its light as a weapon; Guardians, to protect us, and do what the Traveler itself no longer can."

Ghost spun around me, as if to tell me 'Yeah! And you are my Guardian!'

"I could tell you of the great battle, centuries ago... how the Traveler was crippled. I could tell you of the power of the Darkness, its ancient enemy." I shuddered a bit when he said 'Darkness.' Although I have no idea what it was, it definitely rubbed me the wrong way.

"There are many tales, told throughout the City to frighten children. Lately those tales have stopped. Now, the children are frightened anyway."

With a serious tone in his voice, the Speaker turned to look at me. "The Darkness is coming back. We will not survive it this time."

"You saw it yourself, Hana. The Fallen are just the beginning. With the Hive now on Earth, just who knows how long it will be until they come to attack us again..."

I turned to Ghost and he seemed worried. He seemed scared. I knew he was scared because I was feeling scared. I held out my palm and he landed on it, just as he always does.

My father would always tell me that we had to help those in need. That to lend a helping hand was to give it back and pay it forward. He was always a kind man and I miss him incredibly bad. But if my father were here right now, I know exactly what he'd want me to say.

"What can I do?" I asked.

"You must push back the Darkness. Guardians are fighting on Earth and beyond. Join them. Your Ghost will guide you. I only hope he chose wisely.."

"Ghost perked up. "I know I did. I'm sure of it! We're in this together now, Hana."

"It's good to have you on board. Thank you for speaking to us, Mister... Speaker... sir."

I blushed a bit at the pun, but it seemed to make the Speaker laugh. "Humor has a way to ease everyone, doesn't it? I am glad that the light found it's way to you, Hana. Even one as young as yourself, I know you will make a fine Guardian." With that, the Speaker took his leave for the night.

"Well, what now, Ghost?" I asked.

"Well, I just received the code to your living quarters. They're on the East wing of the tower. If you want, I can transmat us there."

"Do your thing, partner!"

In a flash, we found ourselves standing outside a flat door. The sign on the door had numbers etched onto it. '2713'.

Ghost beamed the door once and in a fraction of a second, the door slid open. I stepped inside and the door closed.

Once we were inside, the room slowly lit up to reveal a very humble place. It had a small kitchen area in the walkway with a living room right in front. I walked around and found one bathroom with a shower and across from it a spacious bedroom. "This is ours?" I asked.

"All ours. When we have the time, we can go into the city to get some stuff for the kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom, but I'm afraid you'll have to make due with your armor and the clothes you had on when you died." Ghost said.

It was still a little weird to hear Ghost speak as if I really did die, but it was becoming more and more mundane when people spoke like that. "Alright... I am exhausted! I think I'm going to take a shower and just plop right onto sleep."

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take off my armor. At least, that's how it started. Once I realized the armor was on tight, I did the reverse of when I tried on new armor. Focusing on my body, I transmatted the pieces off one by one until I felt the cool breeze on my skin for the first time.

I looked myself in the mirror and sure enough, my body and face were mine, just as I always saw it day in and day out in the mirror. There was just one difference. "My eyes..." The shown a brilliant amber color, almost like fire.

Thinking nothing of it, I hoped into the shower and felt reborn as the hot water poured over my body. I stood in the shower thinking about all the things I've done today.

I crawled around factories and walls, killing Fallen and Hive left and right. I remembered the Archon, flying through the air in my ship and zipping across the Cosmodrome on my sparrow.

It felt so surreal to think that I spent the last sixteen hours constantly doing something that I would never have done back home.

I missed my dad. I missed him so much and I just wanted to see him again.

I cried.

I cried.

And I cried.

I was so thankful that I was in the shower because I didn't want Ghost to know that I was crying. "Are you okay, Hana?" Of course, sometimes it was hard to hide your emotions from someone that shared a neural interface with you.

"Yeah, everything's fine, Ghost. I just..."

Ghost called out to me. "It's okay, Hana. I know."

I turned off the shower, drying myself off and wrapped the towel around my body. The lights turned off and I slumped into bed. The window was floor to ceiling with curtains to cover it, but I left them open.

The Tower was definitely breathtaking at night. The lights from the city were glittering in the distance with The Traveler looming over it. It was a sight to see and I wont lie, a bit frightening thinking that it might just fall out of the sky.

But there it was, keeping watch over The Last City. It made me feel sympathetic towards it.

I rolled over and held out my palm. Ghost landed on it and I brought him close to me, drifting off to sleep as I cried some more.

"Happy birthday, Hana." Was all I heard from Ghost as I succumbed to my sleep.

Author's note: Thank you all for reading. I hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think!