Adagio
Adagio – musical marking, slow and stately (literally, "at ease")
Chapter 13: Make Believe (Itsuwari 偽り)
Itsuwari means falsehood; fabrication; a fiction or a make believe.
If someone is living in a make-believe world, they are imagining or pretending that something is real or true, oftentimes better, different, or more exciting than they actually are.
We even make ourselves up, fusing what we are with what we wish into what we must become. I'm not sure why it must be so, but it is. ― Robert Fulghum
Hair dyed and dried, the next challenge was to find Relena something to wear.
With the sole goal of making her less recognizable, they went the opposite of Relena's go-to styles. Less preppy, less girly, no business casual please.
After spending a few minutes going over the clothes in Relena's suitcase, Hilde declared none of them was suitable for the 'disguise'. The two of them were about the same size, so they went through Hilde's wardrobe instead, which did offer a broader mix of styles.
Hilde made her wear a few different outfits, commenting, "You need more colors in your wardrobe, Miss Relena."
She took absolutely no insult from that comment. Relena looked at herself in the mirror, amazed at the image staring back at her.
"This is positively the brightest color I've ever worn," she agreed, adjusting the beanie on her head and turning to grin at her friend. "Orange is the new black."
Hilde collapsed onto the bed with a laugh.
The saying that beautiful people looked good in everything? Hilde discovered it was not exactly true.
Just like average people, there were certain colors and styles that complimented them better. While others, though not plain ugly, were somewhat unflattering.
This particular outfit was something that Hilde suggested, a decidedly bolder street style. Despite her bravado, Relena looked very out-of-place as a skater girl: a black cropped top, denim shorts, a pair of mid-calf cotton socks with orange stripes. She had a red checkered flannel shirt tied around the waist and of course, that bright orange toque on her head.
It wasn't a terrible look. But certain styles required certain elements, like being tall, or curvy, or androgynous. To pull off a hip hop style, a carefree attitude was a must have. And that, her friend had in pathetically limited supply.
As if to prove that particular point, Relena tugged on the cropped top, untied the flannel shirt from her waist, and turned to ask if she could wear it normally. Hilde dissolved into a fresh wave of laughter.
"Not the one, I take it." Wiping tears from her eyes, Hilde recomposed herself enough to rise and grab another outfit.
"I really like the hat," Relena offered. "It is, well... very special."
"Do you? Let's see what works with the hat, then." Hilde went to dig through her dresser. "I think I have some graphic shirts around. Non-navel showing, don't worry."
She tried the punk style for a size, keeping the denim shorts but swapping the socks with black tights, the cropped shirt with a printed, artistic t-shirt. The red flannel was kept too, this time worn over the shirt, with rolled up sleeves. It ended up more 90s grunge than rock and roll, with the orange beanie being the literal cherry-on-top.
Goodness, Relena thought to herself, it was hard to rock a totally different look and felt authentic. She felt like a cosplayer. All hail all hallows' eve.
"Want to try something beachy?" Hilde called out. "Howard sent us some Hawaiian shirts."
Relena went to sit on the bed, recalling the peculiar, but kind, engineer and his singular preference for Hawaiian shirts and retro-styled sunglasses. "That's very nice of him. Is Howard well?"
"Happily retired," Hilde answered. "The shirt is a little big. You may need to wear something underneath. Orange or pink?"
"I have a new fondness for the color tangerine," she replied, getting an unladylike snort from Hilde. Relena looked at the pile of clothes on the bed. "Um, Hilde? I think we are going off on a tangent."
"What?" Hilde's voice came from the corner of the room. She returned with a nude tank top on one hand. "We are supposed to get you in a disguise."
"Yes," she smiled up at her friend. "A disguise, not a costume. I'm supposed to be unnoticeable, remember?"
Hilde clicked her tongue. "So the orange hat is out."
"As much as I like the hat," she said, holding up the yellow aloha shirt against her torso. "With this hair and the shirt, I'm going to look very sunflowery."
Hilde bit back a smile. "You do have a point."
It was a personal challenge, finding something which was simple yet made Relena look different from usual.
Hilde handed her a white t-shirt and jeans, claiming it was the 'basic of the basics'. Before Relena closed the bathroom door, she called out, slipping another piece of clothing in. "Wait. Try this one too. It has a flexible waist."
She had noted how low her denim shorts had hung on her friend's hips. Being about the same size did not equal to being the exact same size.
Relena went out after a few minutes, in plain shirt and jeggings. She walked over to deposit the rest of the clothing back onto the bed.
"This one is very ordinary looking," she said. "I mean, in the best possible way."
Hilde laughed at that. Relena gave her a big smile.
"The jeans are very comfortable, Hilde." She turned in front of the mirror, her voice full of marvel. "Well fitting. Easy to move in. It even has pockets."
Relena had worn the t-shirt tucked in, managing to look spiffy instead of nerdy.
"You don't have jeans," Hilde guessed.
Relena lifted an eyebrow. "I do. I just didn't bring it with me for this trip."
Which meant, "You don't wear one often."
"There are not very many occasions for it?" she tried. The poor girl, not being able to go out did that to people. "This pair is truly excellent. You sure I can borrow it?"
"You can have it," Hilde offered. "If you are okay with a used one."
"Oh no, I can't possibly. I'll just get one myself," she said. "I already have a list, you see. More colors. Starting with the hat."
"Uh-huh. There is nothing wrong with primary colors." Hilde smiled. She ran a critical eye over her friend. "Or secondary. White is not good for your complexion."
"There goes half of my clothing," Relena returned playfully. "I have a beige cardigan with me. Will that work?"
She made Relena try it on over the white tee. "Better, but that style is very you. Let's try something different."
"Okay," Relena answered. "Can I keep the jeans?"
"You like it that much, huh? Sure. But I'm choosing the top."
After a text from the girls, they went to wash up and waited in the living room. Heero had picked a seat facing the door, steadfastly ignoring the smirk on Duo's face, as well as his lamentation on how they had missed the 'fashion show'.
Thankfully, they didn't have to wait for too long. The door opened with a click.
"Oh-ho!" Duo commented, "Did you get a makeover too, babe? Diggin' the new look."
"Thanks!" Hilde brightly returned. "I can hide the holster better in this."
Duo lifted his eyebrows. "Bet your new stylist didn't choose the outfit with that in mind."
What Hilde wore did look like something Relena would pick: a bleached denim with rolled cuffs and a marinières – a sailor striped top. The gun-concealing outerwear in question was a lightweight buttonless blazer in navy blue. It looked more put together than the tall, multi-colored jumper she previously had on.
"Oh, you'd be surprised," Hilde smiled. "One can be chic and badass at the same time. Gentlemen, meet my new favorite stylist."
"And mine," Relena walked in, returning the comment with an elegant wave of a hand.
At the silence that greeted them, Hilde shared a look with Relena. "I may have found my true calling. Any thoughts of hiring me for real, Miss Relena?"
"Is that really you, princess?" She turned to Duo, "No, Mr. Maxwell. Ms. Schbeiker's new personal shopper here." Duo laughed.
She chuckled and shook her head. "My e-link face recognition actually stopped working. Good thing there is still the fingerprint scanner."
"No fake nose needed," Hilde said.
She stopped in front of him.
"Heero. You changed," she smiled, noting the dark henley. The t-shirt he had worn in the morning got some sweat and grease on it, so he had pulled on another top. Saying 'you did too' might sound redundant, so he simply nodded.
"Guys," Hilde interjected. "Seriously, how does she look?"
When she first came through the door, training had kicked in. When tailing someone, if the target tried to blend into a crowd, one should not focus on superficial looks. Outfit could be easily swapped. The hair could be a wig. Rely on things which would be less likely to change. The footwear, the gait. Internal facial features – the nose, the mouth, the shape of the eyes – were much harder to alter.
In that sense, she didn't change that much. Still the same white tennis shoes, the one she had worn the entire weekend. The same accessories, the gold studs on her ears, his wearable link/tracker on her left wrist. The same way of standing, gesturing. And of course, the biggest tell was her voice. There was no mistaking the way she called his name.
The rest of her getup, though, had not stayed the same. When someone put their mind concealing their identity, it could indeed be very effective.
"You looked…" he paused. "Different."
"I know," she simply said. "But is it enough not to be recognized? Can you tell it is me?"
He could recognize her anywhere, disguise or no disguise. But he didn't think that was the answer she was looking for.
Not hearing an answer from him, she turned her attention to Duo.
"Duo? What do you think?"
"Well," he said, unabashedly checking her out. "I think you look smokin'."
Hilde landed a karate chop at the back of the braided former pilot's head. "Not that."
"Ouch," he whined, getting an eye-roll from Hilde. "Careful with the hair."
At the girls' expectant looks, Duo went on, "She looks different all right. If you ask me whether she won't have eyes on her though…? Nope."
"I knew it," her shoulders slumped. "We should have gone with the darker dye, Hilde."
"No, no. It would have been a disaster," Hilde maintained. "Your hair is too light to take on darker hues. Home dye is not like a salon one, you know, there will be uneven patches."
Relena smiled good humoredly. "I'd attract attention then."
"Not in a good way," Hilde grinned, agreeing.
"I still think I should wear the hat and the glasses," she continued.
While conversations flowed around the room, Heero took the time to catalogue Relena's new look.
He had seen her wearing makeup, professionally done or otherwise. He had seen her in various attires, both formal and informal. From full regalia, to ball gowns, to cocktail dresses. Dressy suits for official events, business formal, semi casual. He knew how she looked with no makeup on. In house wear. Sleep wear, even. This was… somewhere in between.
He had never seen her in this kind of outfit before. A pair of dark jeans, in midnight blue. A crimson shirt with a draped, relaxed fit. Soft looking, with a semi-glossy, barely there shine.
She had her bangs parted sideways, forehead showing. Red lipstick. The color, and the shade of her top, brought out coppery hues in her newly colored hair, which she had let loose, in wavy curls. With the liner and dark lashes, it was a more grown-up look than what he was used to.
The one that really threw him off was the eyes. Gone were her ocean-colored eyes, covered by steely grey contact lenses. It was a dull color, he thought, finding it somewhat hard to get accustomed to.
"Advanced Disguise 101," Duo began. "It isn't just how you look, it is how you act."
"Is that the finger counting thing?" Hilde asked. "How do you do it, Miss Relena?"
Relena raised a fist, thumb out. "One. Starting from the thumb. Same as you, Hilde."
Hilde took it as a win. "See, your way is strange Duo."
Duo shook his head. Lost causes, these European chicks were. "You wanna hear me out or not?"
"Yes Instructor. This is quite a meticulous planning, I must say."
"Hear, hear. And after you made her sport the mafia look too."
Duo wiggled his index finger. "Tsk, tsk, tsk. It was the lover of a Yakuza boss. Don't get 'em confused."
Hilde burst out laughing. Relena turned sideways, pressing a fist to her mouth.
Duo had insisted she try on a pair of sunglasses, claiming that no disguise was complete without one. Seeing how she looked in it, he had ran to fetch her a leather jacket. Eyeing him from lowered rayband, she concluded, "I look very suspicious. And the jacket is too big."
Relena had also taken off the additional accessories, a black chocker and a pair of sky high leather boots, saying, "I'll just stick with the hooded jacket, Hilde. The regular one. Thank you."
Heero had barred anyone from taking pictures. Not even after Duo begged, "One shot. I won't get her face in it. Side look? From the back?" No meant no. He had brooked no name-calling as well, lacklusterly said that no, it didn't make him a thug. The guy didn't even take the sunglasses. Wowie, wowser.
"Alrighty, back to the topic. My point is, you need to develop a new persona." Relena looked at Duo, playing along. "If anyone asks, you will say that you are…"
"Your American cousin?"
"Girl, you ain't foolin' nobody."
"German cousin," Heero supplied from the side.
Relena went 'ah'. Turning to Hilde, she said, "Hallo Kusine Hildegard. Danke schön, dass Sie uns herum geführt haben." (Hello Cousin Hildegard. Thank you for showing us around.)
They didn't know what surprised them more, the fact that Relena could speak German, or that Heero had volunteered the information. Duo latched onto the second. Hilde reacted to the first.
"Donnerwetter!" she exclaimed, before slapping a hand on her mouth. "Shoot, I can't curse in front of you anymore."
"You can," Relena said, reticent humor lacing her voice. "I don't know very many swear words."
Hilde laughed. "I can definitely help with that. Are you fluent otherwise? You never told me you speak German."
Relena smiled and nodded. On her friend's last comment, she paid Heero a peripheral glance. "Um… you never asked?"
Duo could have sworn a small muscle in Heero's jaw twitched, as if suppressing a smile.
[Donnerwetter is a mild cuss. The actual translation is 'thunderstorm'. Used casually, it means 'gosh' or 'damn' or 'holy sh**'. You know, just your everyday epithet.]
Relena thought that she was pretty good at braiding. Hilde, as it turned out, was much better than her.
The men had gone out to the garage to gear up, loading the luggage back into the car and going over – possibly arguing over – the high-level itinerary. Relena, to Heero's dissatisfaction, had left most of the planning to Duo and Hilde, trusting them almost unconditionally. Heero, on the other hand, had come up with a number of conditions and qualifiers. If it was too sketchy, it was out. If it was too open, or too closed, it was out. To Duo's chagrin and mounting vexation, he wasn't shy to question, probe, and repeatedly cross-examine the things Duo said with Hilde.
It had earned him yet another new moniker from Duo: killjoy. As if being called a Yakuza wasn't an insult enough. He bore the verbal affronts and ceaseless ribbing stolidly well. It was almost funny how the two former pilots' drastically different personalities clashed, resulting in more than a few unintentional double act episodes. Heero, arrow straight and serious, while Duo, well, infinitely less so. Relena did her hardest not to laugh. It wasn't fair to Heero. He was being plenty flexible already… for his standard.
While the boys were out, Hilde had caught her putting what Duo had dubbed her 'Clark Kent' glasses back on and tucking in her hair under a hat.
Hilde, unwilling to let the grand fruits of her labor completely covered up, had taken it upon herself to do her hair. If Relena insisted on having her hair tied, it should at least be tied up nicely.
Relena thought it wouldn't make much difference, since it would end up hidden anyway, but had meekly sat down as she was told to, letting her pro bono stylist do her work.
"You are very good with your hands, Hilde," she said, using her e-link as a makeshift hand mirror. Her friend had woven a loose French braid around her head like a crown, tying the ends up into a neat low ponytail. "These are excellent braids."
"I have a lot of practice," Hilde grinned. "It is fun playing with long hair. Mine is too short to do anything with."
"Ever thought of growing it out? A longer hair will look good on you too."
She laughed and shook her head. "Knowing the care and necessary upkeep? I'll pass."
The guys opened the door and walked in.
"Ready, ladies? Whatcha talking about?"
"Haircare," Hilde replied, proudly showing them her handiwork. "Should I get certified? I think I can make a good living as a beautician."
"Nah," Duo said. "It's the models who are wonderful."
At Hilde's raised eyebrows, he pouted. "What, I'm no longer pretty enough for you babe?"
Not getting much reaction from his girlfriend, he switched from the cute act to a haughtily sultry look, eyelashes fluttering. It successfully sent both girls into laughter: a suppressed snort from Hilde and a gasp of a chuckle from Relena.
Warming up into the act, Duo went to sit on the sofa, arranging himself into a pose, like a model in a photoshoot. He pulled Relena, who was watching him amusedly, off-balance, roping her into an impromptu photo op.
"Smile, princess!" he stage-whispered, nodding towards their enraptured audience. "We're on camera."
Oh the irony, playing pretend after all their efforts to be off-camera. Relena tried, and ultimately failed to hold her poise, laughing so hard she went into a coughing fit.
Hilde and Heero stood there, shaking, for completely different reasons. One tearing up with laughter. The other holding back, and barely succeeding, from physically assaulting the zero two pilot.
Finally managing to pull herself together, Hilde went to drag her boyfriend off the sofa, ending the photo session.
"All right, pretty boy," she said, playfully pinching both of his cheeks. "Now drop it."
Relena looked up from the ID card in her hand, which Duo had handed over oh-so-casually. "…is this legal?"
"Ask me no question, missy, and I'll tell you no lies."
"So this is why you asked me to pick a last name."
She had chosen the name Lena Schmidt, to fit the German backstory. Duo had taken the liberty to fill in the rest of her information, listing Munich as her city of residence and February 29, 180 A.C. as her birthdate. The rest was accurate. She refused to think about how much of her personal information ended up in the public domain, or how closely the AI generated image of her resembled her current look.
"Am I going to get in trouble if I take this? Why do we need an ID anyway?"
"For fun," Duo said. "You gave me a souvenir, so I'mma give you one too."
Duo had loved the carnival-style poop hat, proposing a couple look. Hilde, on the other hand, was far from enamoured with the idea. She made him swear not to wear it in her vicinity. That left Relena wondering what to do with the leftover hat. Anne's twin sons would fight if there was only one. Later, she thought, there was something bigger going on here.
"Don't worry Miss, I mean, Lena, we are not forming a syndicate or anything." Relena looked at Hilde with brand new eyes. She had always viewed her friend as a good, law-abiding citizen. Except that she did have that stint as a guerilla fighter.
"Does everyone have one? Or is it just me?" What she thought was, was this actually common? Was she the weird one?
"Hil and I don't need 'em. Your man here already got one. Better quality, too."
That was the straw that broke the camel's back. She turned to him slowly. "You do?"
"For the hotel," Heero said. It was one of the rule of thumbs. Never book anything under your own name. It had worked before, when he was manhunted. He figured it still applied now, in his role as an executive protection agent.
Duo sagely nodded, adding, "Couldn't get ya rooms as the VFM security guy, could he now? Heero Yuy is kinda an ostentatious name."
There were too many things running through her head. All she said was, "Can I see?"
He pulled a card off his wallet. She skimmed through the details. Adrian Black. L1 colonist. Birth date January 1, 180 A.C. Oh, his blood type was A. She would ask if that was true later.
Handing it back to him, she asked, "Am I not supposed to be concerned that fake IDs can be printed out this easily?"
"Nah," Duo shrugged. "It takes more to pop a good forge. Microprints, holo, UV marker. Embedded IC chip. We didn't even hack into the Interplanetary Identification Database for these. No biggie, see?"
She dragged her gaze between Heero and Duo, suddenly presenting an united front. Sometimes, she forgot who these men were.
"When I get home," she said, decidedly closing the book on the entire thing. "I'll put this in a box and pretend it never exists."
Duo grinned. "Pretend what exists? Ain't nobody was here at all."
Having perfected our disguise, we spend our lives searching for someone we don't fool. ― Robert Brault
I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream
I know you, that gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam
Yet I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem
But if I know you, I know what you'll do
You'll love me at once
The way you did once upon a dream
— Sleeping Beauty, Once Upon A Dream