Reimu was walking towards her shrine humming a happy tune. Not only did she just make 2000 yen from her first job but Yuuka had also hinted at her getting a second one from the Aki sisters. Additionally, Yuuka just bought one of her fumo dolls for about 50000 yen to give to Wriggle. Everything was going great. The only thing that she was worried about was why did the Aki sisters ask for her help. None of them had given birth or taken in a child recently.
Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the sound of a gap opening and her falling into a dimension surrounded by a ton of eyes.
"YUKARI!" yelled Reimu.
"Now now dear, that's not the proper way to greet your employer."
Reimu begrudgingly sat down and listened to Yukari.
"You remember that party that was held about two weeks ago right?"
"Yeah, what about it?"
"Well," started Yukari. "Somehow, Marisa's 'homemade' alcohol ended up at another party held at Eintei and now we have another incident that can't be resolved. Marisa wasn't even there."
"What does this have to do with me then?" asked Reimu.
"Chen and a few fairies partook in this event and ended up drinking that without knowing," answered Yukari. "I only found out moments ago when Ran told me that she needed to wash Chen's clothes and clean our bathroom."
Reimu sighed. This meant that Yukari was probably going to freeload off of her again and she was also gonna have to deal with another of Kasen's scoldings.
Whenever Kasen and Yukari meet, the duo would often start a fight that would last for a few hours. While their fights are really just minor annoyances, no one wanted to be around when the duo began arguing and sometimes, property damages occurred.
"Alright then, but you're gonna have to sleep in the bathroom," said Reimu.
"I'd take you up on that offer but I wasn't asking for housing," stated Yukari. "I was gonna ask you to babysit Chen at your place."
"What!" yelled Reimu.
"Yeah. Both Ran and I need to check on Yuyuko and we can't take Chen with us in that state," explained Yukari. "Also, both Ran and I don't want our house to smell while we're away."
"Great," sighed Reimu. "How long will this be for?"
"An hour at most," answered Yukari. "It's really urgent. So can I put it in for tomorrow?"
"Yukari, even as a friend, you need to follow the rules," stated Reimu. "I'll make an exception this time but anything else needs to be scheduled one week in advance."
"Good. Also, Satori and I are paying you double. Orin might show up and your shrine might be full of corpses by the time she's done."
Reimu got up and nodded.
"Alright but I'm gonna need you to provide me with a list of things about Chen. Especially since her new bathroom tendencies may cause some problems."
"So Yukari managed to convince you to babysit her grandkid and offered to pay you double once she got back?"
Ryusei had been cleaning her home while she was out babysitting Wriggle. He had also got her several shipments of fumo dolls in case she needed to sell or give them away.
"Yep," replied Reimu. "And to make matters worse, Chen's got a bathroom problem."
"Why would Yukari and Ran need to check on Yuyuko?" asked the samurai as he opened a box.
"Cuz, Yuyuko drank some of that weird alcohol and now she's got some bathroom issues now," answered Reimu. "The problem is, she's a ghost so normally, she can't use the bathroom since everything she eats and drinks just disappears. For her to start having human needs could mean something is wrong with either her or the seal that keeps her active as a phantom."
Reimu placed her earnings inside an interesting looking box that Ryusei had bought for her and pressed a button.
"Erm, you sure this is gonna stop thieves?"
"Positively," answered Ryusei. "The moment the thief touches the contents of the box, they'll receive this."
Using a long hard rubber stick, he gently placed a fake hand on top of the stack of yen and to her amazement, the hand began to move until he withdrew it. Ryusei then repeated it with a wooden stick and got the same result though this time he was sent flying a few feet back.
"They can't disable it unless you give them the code," added the samurai as he got up. "My armor's shielding really came in handy this time. Those electric shocks are no joke. Also, if they get the combination wrong, they'll get a small static shock."
"Is it lethal?" questioned Reimu.
As much as she wanted the thief to taste her sweet revenge, she certainly didn't want to be part of a "murder" case.
"No it's not. But it certainly would knock them out for the next few hours," replied Ryusei. "If you ever forget the code, call me."
The two left the box alone and added the finishing touches to Reimu's shrine.
"By the way, what happened between your master and Yukari?" asked Reimu.
"It's a long story."
"I've got time."
"Well… to put it simply, the two were like Romeo and Juliet," answered Ryusei. "Except, they both knew each other since they were kids and didn't get married."
"Uh-huh."
"The problem is, my master wanted to be a samurai and according to our rules, samurai can't get married unless they wish to retire," continued Ryusei.
"In other words, even though they liked each other, they couldn't get married unless your master wanted an early retirement," commented Reimu.
"Exactly."
"Then why break up? Can't they remain friends like us?" asked Reimu.
"I'm still trying to get my facts straight for that part," answered Ryusei. "Hopefully, I'll have them by my next visit."
"What facts?"
Both Ryusei and Reimu stopped their conversation and turned to see Kasen at the steps.
"Hey Kasen! Long time no see," greeted Reimu.
"Hello Reimu. Aya just sent me this little ad and I'd like to know what is going on," responded Kasen. "Babysitting youkai! Of all things! I thought you knew better."
"Well," started Reimu. "I did need the money and the Moriya shrine really cheated me out of this one-"
"No buts," responded Kasen. "I'm sure your new boyfriend had something to do with this."
"We're not dating," added Ryusei.
"You're not helping," informed Reimu.
"Shut it you two," ordered Kasen. She then pounced on Reimu.
"THIS IS THE BEST IDEA I'VE SEEN IN A CENTURY!" declared Kasen.
"W-what?" asked a confused Reimu and Ryusei.
"Not only are you doing your job for once but you're also making good money off it!"
"Huh?"
"Think about it. By taking care of the younger youkai, most of the human villagers don't have to worry about them misbehaving by attacking them as you are keeping them out of trouble and away from humans," explained Kasen. "In other words, you've technically exterminated them without even exterminating them for real."
"That's true," commented Reimu.
"Also, you're getting paid by the youkai to do this so humans don't have to worry about coming to your shrine and only need to worry about when you'll show up and host an event," added Kasen. "I really love the idea. If you want, you can count me in to help you babysit some of the kids."
"Kasen," addressed Ryusei. "If that is your name, we kinda need help but not for the babysitting part. Well, not yet I suppose."
Kasen gave a confused look at the red samurai.
"Who are you?" asked Kasen.
"I'm Ryusei. I'm a samurai that visits Reimu's shrine."
Both Ryusei and Reimu agreed that if anyone asked Ryusei about who he was, the only information they would give out was the fact that he was a samurai that frequented the Hakurei shrine.
"Oh. Wow, it's pretty rare to see a samurai of all people nowadays," commented Kasen. "Anyways, what was that you were saying?"
"We don't need another sitter at the moment but we do need help nonetheless," informed Ryusei.
"Go on."
"So Moriya Shrine hijacked our original plan to babysit human kids by stealing our posters and modifying them to promote their own shrine and babysitting service," explained Ryusei. "We could really use your help to get some payback."
"Hmm," thought Kasen. "Normally, I'd rather stay out of this type of drama but since the Moriya shrine really stooped this low, I'm gonna help you guys. What's the plan?"
The trio sat in silence before Reimu spoke up.
"I know! Why not convince Keine to lead after school activities and take care of nursery kids?" suggested Reimu. "After all, if Keine was the one taking their customers, they can't do anything about it since it's her job."
"Good idea," commented Kasen. "I'll figure out the rest from here. By the way, I'm going to visit the SDM later. If you want, I can drop them an ad."
"Also, can you do me a favor and ask the Aki sisters what they want from me?" asked Reimu.
"Will do," answered Kasen. "Good luck with your next kid."
Kasen got up and left while Ryusei brought out two bento boxes and handed one to Reimu.
"Good luck tomorrow. I'm going to be visiting my master and delivering a letter so I won't be able to visit you till after dark," informed Ryusei.
"Alright then," replied Reimu. "I'll see you then."
The next morning, Reimu woke up early to prepare breakfast and wait for Yukari. She had some food leftover from the night before so it didn't take her too long to finish cooking and eating before waiting outside on her porch.
Just as she sat down, a gap opened up and out came Ran, Yukari, and Chen. The former was carrying two large bags which were supposed to contain supplies for Chen.
"Morning Reimu," greeted Yukari. "This is the list of things that you can feed Chen. By the way, you do have a changing room right? These are for her."
"Changing room?" asked Reimu. She took the list and looked inside one of the bags that Ran had been carrying.
"Diapers? Baby wipes? How bad is it?" questioned Reimu.
"Pretty bad. It's the second most of the time," answered Yukari. "Here, these are her favorite fumo dolls. If you ever need to distract her, use them."
Reimu nodded and took the items Yukari gave her.
"I should be back in the afternoon. Till then, tata~"
Yukari opened a gap and disappeared with Ran leaving Reimu all alone with Chen.
"Reimu-shama, can we play?"
Reimu smiled and ushered Chen inside her shrine.
"Sure what do you want to play?"
The bakeneko held out a fumo doll of Ran.
"Let's play with dollies!" replied Chen.
Reimu put all the items on her table and brought out her own fumos before sitting down with Chen.
"Okay. Which one should we play with?" asked the shrine maiden.
"This one!"
Chen picked the Chen fumo and handed Reimu a Sanae fumo.
"I'm gonna be the cat hero and you're gonna be the big green meanie!"
"Okay, who taught her this? Not that she's wrong though," thought Reimu as she picked up the doll and began to play with Chen.
"Boom!" yelled Chen. "I hit you with one of my glowing balls!"
Reimu smiled and pretended to fall to the floor with the fumo.
"Oh no! You got me," exclaimed Reimu. "I would have won if it weren't for the meddling cat."
Reimu gently put down the doll and watched as Chen pounced on it and hit it a few times with her own doll. Suddenly, Chen started clutching her stomach.
"Chen, are you okay?" asked Reimu.
A loud growl could be heard as Chen slowly and weakly turned towards Reimu.
"I'm hungry."
Reimu quickly got up and ran to her kitchen with Yukari's list. Despite being very close to Yukari, she wasn't sure what Chen could and could not eat so she had to consult the list.
"Okay nothing with raisins, no raw eggs, and nothing with onions or garlic. Great, that means I've got nothing in my pantry for her."
Reimu checked the two bags again and to her relief, there were a few tins of cat food and canned fish. After reading the paper again, Reimu opened up two cans and put them in a bowl. Once she finished emptying the cans, she picked up the bowl and a spoon to give to Chen.
"Chen! Food's ready."
The nekomata walked over to Reimu and began to eat the food that was given to her.
Reimu gave a small sigh of relief and after watching the hungry cat youkai eat for a few minutes, left to get some crayons and paper.
Knowing most fairies and child-like youkai, Reimu figured that Chen would probably want to draw some pictures or read a book after eating. Hence, why she was looking for blank sheets of paper that she probably wouldn't need in the future.
Once she had gotten enough, she checked up on Chen to see if she had finished eating. Sure enough, the bakeneko was just about finished with her food.
"Thanks for the food Reimu-shama!"
Reimu couldn't help but smile upon seeing the happy cat youkai kid. Though she would never admit it, Reimu had a soft spot for kids regardless of them being youkai, fairy, or human.
"You're welcome. Do you want to draw pictures?" asked Reimu.
Chen nodded and eagerly took the crayons and paper from Reimu to start drawing. Within a few minutes, Chen had managed to create a childish picture of a house and several people whom Reimu recognized as Yukari, Ran, Youmu, and Yuyuko based on the colors used.
After watching Chen draw a few more pictures, Reimu patted the little cat on the head before leaving to put away some of the items Yukari had given her.
"Let's see now, the cat food should go in here, the spare clothes I should put in this pile…"
Reimu picked up several identical outfits and placed them in a basket labeled "clean clothes." Afterwards, she picked up the baby wipes and placed them in her bathroom supply cabinet.
"Well, it seems like I won't be needing to use these after all," thought Reimu as she added the diapers to the cabinet.
"Ran and Yukari probably overreacted. Chen's not gonna empty her bowels on herself without any warning first."
Just as she finished, she felt Chen tugging on her. The look on her face and distinctive stains on the bottom half of her clothes immediately told Reimu what had just happened.
"Nevermind, I spoke too soon."
She quickly picked up Chen and took her to the bathroom along with the baby items she had been given. "My shrine's gonna smell pretty bad tonight."
"Is that Ran?" asked Reimu.
"Yes! That's Ran-shama!" replied Chen.
After cleaning the bakaneko, Reimu decided to play a game of "Guess the person" with Chen to take her mind off of the cleaning she needed to do once this was all over. The game involved Reimu and Chen taking turns to use crayons to draw a picture of someone they knew and present it to the other person when it was their turn. So far, Reimu had guessed Youmu, Yuyuko, Yukari, and most recently Ran.
Just as Reimu finished her picture, she heard the sound of a wheelbarrow being parked outside and her front door opening.
"Is it Orin?" asked Chen.
"Yes it is her," answered Reimu and Orin.
Reimu suddenly turned around and nearly jumped upon seeing the kasha.
"Orin! W-when did you-"
"I just got here," answered Orin. "Lady Satori gave me permission today so I'm gonna play with Chen. I learned from Youmu earlier that Chen was gonna be here and sheesh, your shrine really smells."
The Kasha joined the bakaneko and shrine maiden on the floor and picked up a crayon.
"So what are we playing?" asked Orin.
"We're playing guess the person," answered Chen.
"Mind if I join in?"
"I don't mind," answered Reimu. "Though I'll only play a few more rounds. I need to start making dinner after this."
The trio drew a few more pictures before Reimu got up to prepare dinner for three people. As she was fixing the food though, she heard the sound of a wheelbarrow rolling again and ran outside to see Chen and Orin running around and picking up corpses.
"This is not good."
The red and white miko got up and chased after the two twin tailed cats who were grabbing various bodies left and right. From insects to mice, Reimu knew this was not going to end well.
Nazrin had just been looking for Shou's pagoda which she had lost a little while ago. So far, she only managed to find various pieces of gold and silver which she had reburied upon their discovery for future use.
"Sometimes, I wonder if my master loses it on purpose so she could have an excuse to give me something dull and boring."
Little did she know, her day was about to get more interesting.
Reimu had finally managed to catch up to the two cats and got out her gohei. Though she had no intentions of harming the cats, she needed them to stop what they were doing before anyone got hurt.
"Orin! Chen! Stop the cart!"
"Whee!"
The two cats did not listen and Orin joined Chen in her fast moving cart. In response, Reimu positioned herself infront of the cart with the hopes of slowing it down. However, neither of them were paying attention to what was in front of them and by the time Reimu noticed that there was a large humanoid mouse in front of them, it was too late.
"AHHH! CAAAAAATSSSSS!"
Reimu, Chen, and Orin crashed into Nazrin and all four of them were sent flying into the forest of magic where they landed in front of Marisa's house.
"Ow ow ow. Is everyone alright?" asked Reimu.
Nazrin was knocked out while Orin and Chen were both fine and had no injuries.
"That was fun! Can we do it again?" asked Chen.
"No," replied Reimu. "Both of you are not doing that again and you just hit someone."
She walked over to check on Nazrin who was still knocked out. Upon touching her though, the mouse youkai immediately woke up and backed up towards the door of Marisa's house.
"Cats! Cats! Cats! Don't come closer!" yelled Nazrin.
Reimu sighed and extended a hand towards Nazrin.
"Relax, Orin and Chen aren't gonna hurt you."
"I don't think so!" yelled Nazrin. She ran inside Marisa's house and Reimu heard a lot of crashing and banging until Marisa and the Three Fairies of Light came out holding the mouse youkai by the tail.
"And stay out!" yelled Marisa. She gave Nazrin a good kick but lucky for her, Reimu had managed to catch her before she landed.
"Apologies Marisa. I'll help fix the damages later," spoke Reimu.
"No need," replied Marisa. "I'm gonna pay a little visit to the Myouren Temple."
She got on her broom with the Three Fairies and flew off towards the Myouren Temple. Reimu sighed and carried Nazrin and the cats back to her shrine.
"Nazrin, I understand that you don't like cats but I'm gonna have to keep you here for now," informed Reimu. "I'll call Shou and let her know that you're here."
The mouse youkai begrudgingly accepted and allowed herself to stay with her worst fear for the time being.
"Thanks for the help Orin."
Some time after Shou arrived and took Nazrin back(and paid her 2000 yen for keeping her safe), Chen had another accident while she and Orin were playing with fumo dolls. This time, Orin told her a few moments before it occurred so Reimu had time to prepare her bathroom.
"When I find out who served Marisa's laxative filled alcohol, they're gonna wish they were never born in Gensokyo," declared Reimu as she put a new set of clothes on Chen.
"Wait Chen drank a lax alcohol?" asked Orin. "What are laxi-whatever they're called, supposed to be?"
"Laxatives," corrected Reimu. "They're a medicine that's supposed to loosen one's intestines. Eintei has and sells several versions of it and it just so happened that Marisa got a hold of them and used them to make alcohol."
"But why did Marisa make a laxative filled alcohol?" asked Orin.
"You remember that fairy youkai child party, right?" asked Reimu. "We ran out of alcohol for the adults and Marisa volunteered to make the alcohol. Some medicine can be used to make alcohol and I guess Marisa wanted to do just that. Except, she got the wrong medicine and since it was from Eintei, the effects lasted for a week. Somehow, that failed alcohol made it to Eintei's party that was held yesterday."
She finished cleaning her bathroom and got out some picture books for Chen to read while she finished fixing dinner for Chen and Orin.
"Hmm, are they both lactose intolerant?" questioned Reimu. "Maybe I should refrain from giving them milk for the time being."
"They actually aren't," informed an oni.
"Wow, nice to see you here Suika," greeted Reimu sarcastically. The little oni was very well known for not only freeloading but providing most of the shrine's alcohol. Usually, Reimu would drive Suika out after some time but since the little oni also happened to be one of Gensokyo's four devas, Reimu opted to let her stay as to avoid any tensions with the oni. That being said, she was still a major annoyance nonetheless.
"I'm surprised that you're letting those two play around instead of forcing them to do your chores," commented Suika as she put several bottles of wine in one of Reimu's food cabinets.
"Both of them are kids and I'm babysitting them, not using them," replied Reimu. "Besides, where were you yesterday and three weeks ago? I was hosting a party for kids and yesterday, Eintei was holding one as well."
"Rock climbing with Yuugi," answered Suika. "We took a few wrong turns, brought down someone's home using a weird blocky thing on wheels, and blew up a large weird looking place that had the words city hall on it-"
"Excuse me!? How did you get away with that?"
"It was easy, Yuugi and I ran outside while carrying a cat which we ditched after we followed Yukari into one of her gaps and-"
Reimu heard enough. She quickly finished plating the food before pulling out her gohei and pointing it at Suika.
"Listen here. I don't care if you made it out with Yuugi or Yukari but one thing for certain, if anyone comes knocking on my door to complain about you wrecking their home, I'm getting help to throw you out for good."
Suika shrugged and left the shrine.
"By the way, your place really smells."
"I know that!"
Reimu resisted the urge to throw her gohei at Suika. She knew such displays of violence should not be performed in front of children. Rather, she made a mental note to tell Kasen and Yuugi later to deal with the little oni.
"Dinner's ready!" called Reimu.
The two cats immediately ran over to eat while Reimu walked over to the play area to check if they had brought in any corpses or damaged a fumo doll. To her relief, there weren't any corpses but one of Chen's fumo dolls had a small tear in it. Luckily, Reimu knew how to sew and with a few quick seconds, the damage was already fixed. Upon setting the doll back down, Reimu felt something pounce on her back.
"Reimu! Let's play!"
"Okay okay, here we go then."
Reimu gently set the cat youkai down and played a small game of hide and seek with Chen and Orin until they both got bored and decided to play with the fumo dolls again. Like last time, Reimu was the "villian" and both youkai cats were the "good guys" as Orin called them.
This time though, Reimu was using a Suwako fumo while Chen and Orin were using Yukari and Satori fumo respectively.
"Bam!" yelled Chen as she bashed her doll against Reimu's fumo.
"Gotcha!" added Orin as she copied Chen's actions.
"Oh no! You got me!"
Reimu laughed and played with the cats until she heard a gap open and the sound of someone gagging.
"Reimu! We're here to pick up Chen and Orin!"
"Ran-shama! Yukari-shama!"
Reimu watched as Chen ran over to her masters while Orin changed into her cat form and pounced on a masked Satori. Like a worried parent, Ran checked Chen from head to toe while Yukari picked up Chen's fumo dolls. Satori on the other hand, picked up Orin and counted several bills before handing them to Reimu.
"Ah. So that's why your shrine smells," commented Satori. "Good luck cleaning. It's gonna be hard."
Satori then left through Yukari's gap while Yukari picked up Chen's clothes and trash.
"Did she just read my mind?" asked Reimu.
"Yep. By the way, I left a bottle in your bathroom that should help you get rid of the smell by tomorrow," replied Yukari. "Thanks for watching over Ran's precious kid. Your payment is in your donation box."
"Thanks," replied Reimu. "How's Yuyuko doing?"
"She's fine now," answered Yukari. "Thanks to her nature as a ghost, the effects of the medicine wore off pretty fast and has fully recovered ever since. Even Eiki was worried over temporarily removing Yuyuko from her position."
Reimu smiled and handed Yukari some leftover tea while they watched Ran take care of Chen.
"Did you behave?" asked Ran.
"Yes! Reimu-shama is a kind and fun person!" answered Chen. "Can we please visit again?"
"Yes we can but only if we have time, okay."
"Remember Yukari, this is the only time I'm making an exception. Any other time, you're gonna have to schedule one week in advance," informed Reimu.
"Ara~. Always straight to the point as usual," replied Yukari. "Oh well, time for me to go now."
Yukari motioned for her shikigami to follow her as she opened up a gap and left.
"Ah. Finally some time alone," announced Reimu as she stretched her arms back and laid down in the middle of the shrine.
"Which I'd really enjoy if it weren't for the smell. If I ever have to babysit someone who's got issues with their bodily excretions, I'm gonna make sure that it's not at my shrine."
With that, Reimu got up and began cleaning what she could.