Dear Diary,

It has been…a very interesting couple weeks now. I have lost so much in such a short time. Words cannot express how deep my feelings are in regards to the pain that I feel. I feel like the world that I knew has shown its ugly face, and told me I am not worthy to live in this world. That is just how it feels to me, honestly. I had such a terrific career, and I was about to become someone important…then it was taken from me. That feeling is something I am never going to forget.

Everything just feels so pointless now. I am alive, but I no longer wake up and feel like that I am living. I no longer have an apartment to go back to. I have lost so much weight, that even I can see my own ribs and hips…but I don't care. Even with the new beings I have met, I am not happy here. But leaving doesn't seem much better. It's a shadow that seems intent on following me everywhere…no matter what town or city I live in.

Mirage and Bumblebee still do their best to try and make me smile. They do happen to succeed everyday. I appreciate their efforts, if I am honest. But I am still too scared to open up for a friendship. I am too scared that it will happen again. Mirage and Bumblebee claim that they won't push me aside, but I know that is not true. Once they find a way home, they are not going to look back. They've already made an indication of their distaste for this world, even when they say they see the beauty in it.

Arcee has softened up too, strangely enough. She seems to be the most loyal of them all, and yet, now that my ankle is healed enough, she's opted to take me for drives to girl time. She claims she gets a little tired being surrounded by those three all the time, and it is nice to talk to her. It is from Arcee I am actually understanding more of their situation. Arcee, while respecting Optimus's command, still gives me little pieces of information about their world. I feel for them.

I guess we are just in the same kind of boat. After all, I just feel as though I am drifting.

Closing her diary, Saphira stared at the ceiling of the cab as Optimus continued to drive through the streets of New York. It has been another week and a half at this point, and she had left her apartment a few days ago. Optimus has allowed her to store her clothes, blankets, feminine products and hygiene in the cab, as she didn't have anywhere else to store it. Though Bumblebee and Mirage also offered to take some, which she has accepted for the moment.

Now that she was not in her apartment, and that she no longer had to go to court, as both Claudia and Dylan were charged, sued and given a restraining order by the judge, and they both have been sent to jail for a couple years. And she has also won a large settlement from Arthur as well, which has resulted in him needing to sell off assets, and his business was starting to crumble due to it. But Saphira felt no sympathy for any of them. They got what they deserve, as far as she was concerned.

But with nothing else to do, Saphira had been roped into staying with the autobots. It didn't matter now if it was during the day. She did not mind though. The only time she would interact with people is when she needed to buy some water, food or make use of the laundromat. She did have to convince Optimus to allow her to use public bathrooms to shower and use the toilet, though Saphira was not having showers as regularly as she used to.

She checked the time on her watch and saw it was just after noon. She sighed and just stared at the ceiling. She has not done much, other than keep an eye out of Transit. They really have found more of his trail, but it kept disappearing that she was certain that he was toying with the autobots. She knew that it made them angry each time it happened, but they could only keep trying. And at this point, she was convinced Transit was a bus. They kept following his trail on the bus routes, and that was the main reason why she thought that. But since they seemed to not catch him, he was certainly outsmarting them.

She sat up on the seat and grabbed her brush to brush through her hair. Her hair was not shiny like it used to be. It was dry, easy to get knots in it and it would hurt each time she would brush it. It certainly was not like how it used to be. It used to be shiny, silky and had a natural bounce to it. Now it was frizzy, and there was even a bit of a grey tinge to it. She grimaced as she brushed her hair, annoyed at the knots that she could feel while she thought about a few things.

She looked at the dash as she began to think of some questions for him. "Um…Optimus?" He did not respond to her. "Is it alright if I just ask simple questions? I don't need you to answer anything about where you are from and all…but…uh, is this decepticon really your only chance of finding a way to your home? Were there other means of transportation that you possessed at one point?" She knew he may not respond to her. "I am curious, because things like space travel and special transporters are all still consider science fiction on this world. Heck…so are talking cars…but I know you are more than that."

Optimus listened to the girl while he pondered on responding to her. The past couple weeks has changed a lot for this girl. And Optimus himself has been softened by the fact this girl was skinnier than she was when they first met. She's stopped crying herself to sleep, but she was miserable. Her demeanor honestly reminded him of himself. The day he realized that they were stranded on this world was a day of despair, and he took to hunting the remaining decepticons on this planet in order to try and find their ship.

"Unfortunately, yes," Optimus responded to the girl calmly, startling her as she had not expected him to respond. "While we do have other means of transportation on our world, we do not possess that technology here. So we do not have any other means of leaving this world until we find the ship, or by some miracle, find another way to leave this planet."

She nodded slowly as she listened to him. "It must be hard." She grimaced as the bristles of the brush caught another knot in her hair and she managed to brush through it without ripping strands from her hair. "I guess…if there was some other way to get you home…I would be happy to help you find it. After all, this is not your world…so…"

"Why would you want to help us?" Optimus questioned curiously. "You have already insisted on helping us with Transit. Now you are wanting to help us find a way home. I do not understand this mind of yours." He really did not. This girl should be focused on herself. She should be worried about her own kind. "You should worry about your own kind."

She scoffed and rolled her eyes. "And what has my own kind ever done for me, Optimus?" She shook her head, grimacing as her hairbrush snagged another knot. "My own kind has done nothing but hate my existence on this world. You, at least, acknowledge it…and you are honest about your feelings towards humans. And I really don't blame you. But…because of what people have done to me, I am more interested in helping you. At least I'll have done something worth while in my life."

She had a point. Optimus has observed just how the humans have treated Saphira. While he did not know much about her past, but her former boss had once helped her out. But he betrayed her and kicked her out. She once had a boyfriend, and it turned out, he had not really been her boyfriend the whole time they have known each other. It seems like almost every human in Saphira's life have torn her down, and stomped on her. It actually made a lot of sense as to why she understood Optimus's stance against humans.

"I suppose you are right. My observations of humans have not proven to be good. If humans treat their own kind as bad as they do with you, how would they treat us?" Saphira nodded in agreement as she continued brushing her hair as the knots were finally gone for now. Optimus observed her quietly. "I think now is a good time for me to tell you a little more about our kind." Saphira looked at the dash in surprise, as she had not expected that. "You already know that we have been at war with the decepticons. But the war has gone on for centuries. I believe it is still happening back on our world…even though we were meant to regroup and return home to continue to fight."

Saphira knew they had been in a war. And she felt sorry for them. "It must be hard. You are a leader…and I have never been in a war. But I know, from stories from veterans, that war is nasty. It changes people." She felt some tears in her eyes as she thought about it. "I can't imagine the loss you feel, Optimus. I imagine you have lost so many friends, family…maybe even someone you loved…" She shrugged as she did not know of his past. "I may not know the circumstance of your war, but I sympathise with you, Optimus. You feel the weight of it on your shoulders, and I suspect, you also feel like you've failed those still back on your home world. Those still fighting for you."

Optimus wasn't expecting this kind of deep sympathy from a human. And she was right. He felt so much weight and guilt on his shoulders, and Optimus did wish he could go back to change things. And with a narrowing window of not being able to return home was really getting to him. It made him angry at times to watch humans go about their world, and be able to enjoy their home, while he was stuck on this world wondering what is happening back home.

"I am thankful that you seem to sympathise and understand where I stand. For a human as young as yourself, it seems as though wisdom has been in your veins for a long time." Saphira shrugged as she did not believe that. She wiped the tears from her cheeks and he hummed softly. "I am afraid, even if I were to ask for your help, there might not be much you can do. A ship is the only hope we currently have. If we lose it…I am not sure what we can do. That is the one thing I worry about."

Saphira understood that. "I would still try. Just like I am still keeping an eye out for Transit. I am pretty sure he is a bus, just based on where you find the trails. But he is turning it into a game…that is what it looks like to me." She glanced at the side view as she noticed Bumblebee driving by Optimus. "Ah, I guess Bumblebee has decided to say hello."

Optimus knew that Bumblebee was likely there to take Saphira off his hands, and that was fine. "He probably wants to take you for a drive, human." He turned right suddenly, turning into a wide alleyway with Bumblebee driving ahead of him. "At least, with your ankle mostly healed, you no longer need us to help you in and out of the vehicles."

She nodded in agreement. "Yeah…" She shifted to move into the passenger seat and she grabbed her bag with her art supplies. "I could use a stop to the restroom as well…but I'll have to have Bumblebee take me."

Optimus made no comment as they came to a stop in the alley once they were mostly out of sight. He opened the door for her to climb out. She was really glad she no longer needed the crutches. Her ankle still hurt sometimes, but as long as she did not put too much pressure on it, she would be fine. Once she reached the ground, she turned to Bumblebee to see the door was open and ready for her to jump in.

Saphira walked over to the camaro to slide in. "Hey, Bee…" She got herself comfortable and pulled the seatbelt on. "Thanks for deciding to take me on for the rest of the day. But…" She squeezed her thighs a little. "I really need to use the restroom. If you could find the nearest gas station, I would really appreciate it. I am holding it as much as I can, but I can't hold it forever and I don't want you to deal with me peeing all over your seats."

"Nope, I definitely don't!" Bumblebee quickly responded as he drove away from Optimus to get back onto the road. "Hold it in, please. We only got about a few minutes before we get to our destination."

Saphira smiled at his light joke while he drove out of the alley onto the road. She still felt a little weird needing to use alleys to move between the autobots. She knew it might look weird if they parked on the street, and she swapped vehicles with no other person moving with her. But she doubted it would raise alarm bells. But she would go with the flow, as this is what Optimus wanted, and she wasn't going to argue with him.

"So…once I have used the toilet, what shall we do today?" Saphria asked Bumblebee curiously. "Shall we…drive along the highway again, or maybe alongside Statue of Liberty, or just travel within Manhattan and around the trade centers? You know, the usual stuff."

"Real funny, sister…real funny." She smirked as she rolled her eyes. "I got a better idea for later tonight." Tonight? His glove box opened suddenly, making her jump in surprise, and a piece of paper fell out. It was the movie schedule for the drive-in theatre he likes to visit. "There's a movie on tonight you might like."

Saphira grabbed the movie schedule to look at it for tonight. She raised an eyebrow when she saw it was the first screening the Lion King. She remembered seeing ads for it on TV, but she had not thought about going to see it. "Ah, I see. You want to go and see the Lion King together?" Bumblebee suddenly began to play The Lion Sleeps Tonight through the radio, making her scoff in amusement and roll her eyes at him. "Okay, okay…well, that answers my question. We can go…as long as Optimus knows and he is okay with it."

"He will be good with it," Bumblebee responded quickly, even though Saphira doubted that Bumblebee had actually told Optimus the plan based upon that response. "He's too focused on our enemy and finding a way home. So he won't notice if we are a little bit late."

Saphira was not so sure. Optimus might have softened to her presence at the moment, but he still did not trust her. She was happy he told her a little more about the past, but he didn't go into too much detail about it. She did think her sympathy for him about what he has been through might have surprised him enough that he did not know what to say to her. And she did think that was a good thing, because she wanted to show Optimus she was not a monster in regards to his situation.

Saphira did not expect Optimus to trust her from her being sympathetic to him, and that was fine. But she did know they were all watching her life go down. So maybe that would help, in some twisted way, but she wouldn't really know fully. She did wish she could help more if there happened to be a history of autobots on this planet, but that also wouldn't really make a lot of sense since the two worlds haven't met before, as far as she knew.

Bumblebee found a gas station rather quickly. As he pulled in, Saphira got out to make her way to the public toilet quickly. She noticed a bus stop across the street from the gas station, and she did consider telling Bee to hang around to see what buses roll by, but she knew that was likely a bad idea, so she would just have to notice the bus stops as they drive through the city in order to spot anything different about any of the buses in the city.

After she used the bathroom, Saphira decided she would go and get something from the station anyway. She left the bathroom, only to feel as though she was being watched. She was a little alarmed as she looked around, but she did not see anyone acting suspicious, and she guessed it could just be Bumblebee. Though she glanced over at the bus stop, and there was a bus there currently, but she could not see the brand badge on it.

She shrugged as she opened the car door and leaned in to grab her purse. "I'm going to go into the station to grab a drink, and maybe something to eat."

"You'd better, we don't need you turning into bones right in front of us," Bumblebee responded, making her frown at him in amusement. "You really should take care of your body. Too skinny is too unhealthy for you."

Saphira appreciated his encouraging words. But she struggled to eat anything. She drank water, but she has gone days without food. She was giving into the temptation to eat today, because she felt like she could eat. "I know, Bumblebee. I know. But I have to take care of my mental and emotional state too." She closed the door and turned to walk into the store. "Thanks for the encouragement."

Saphira still felt the sense of being watched as she walked into the station, and the sensation only faded once she was inside the store. She walked over to the fridge to grab another large bottle of water, as her current bottle was almost empty, and grabbed some coke as well. She thought about what she would end up buying to eat. She grabbed a packet of chips, deciding that was something. But she did want something a bit more filling.

She walked over to the hot box and thought about it some more before getting a burrito to have. She wasn't sure if she would be able to eat the entire burrito, but she would try to get as much of it down as possible. With the items she bought, she walked outside expecting to feel a sense of someone watching her. But she did not. And the bus she had seen across the road had gone. Saphira became a little worried as if that bus she saw was Transit, he saw her with Bumblebee.

She opened the car door and sat inside, placing the chips and coke into the back while leaving the water beside her. Bumblebee saw the burrito in Saphira's hand, and he was happy. "Um…you didn't sense Transit's signal by any chance, Bee?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Well…just now…I got the feeling I was being watched. I thought that might have been you…" She gestured to him before she began to pull at some of the cheese from the burrito. "But there was a bus over at that bus stop…" She points to the bus stop across the street. "And the feeling only went away when that bus was gone. So…I don't know. Maybe it was…" Bumblebee's engine revved and back up suddenly, making her shriek as her body was jerked forward. "What the hell?! I almost dropped my burrito, Bumblebee!"

He did not respond to her as he drove onto the road to follow the direction of the bus. He had seen the bus too, but he did not detect the signal, which meant Transit was shielding his signal. Now he had to locate the decepticon, and follow him. Luckily, there were several hours before the movie would start, but there was no time to waste at potentially locating Transit. And Saphira might have unintentionally spotted him.

Saphira was a little annoyed at his reaction though. She took a small bite of the burrito, and as she chewed it and the flavor danced on her tongue, she smiled as the burrito tasted so good. She swallowed and her stomach did not react like it would by twisting and making her feel nauseous, so she made the right choice to eat something. So she took another bite while Bumblebee focused on tracking down Transit. He was determined to locate the bus, and it might take a bit of time, but he would find him.

Though while he was doing that, he could see Saphira was also taking small bites of the burrito. To him, eat bite was like a miracle. While they did not need food to survive, Bumblebee was aware that humans ate food to survive. And she needed food to put weight back on so she was at a reasonable weight limit, so she would be healthy. He and Mirage had spent a lot time trying to think on how to get Saphira to eat more food. But she has not made it easy as her grief and overwhelmed emotions was keeping her from eating more food.

"Captain, we have a problem," Bumblebee said through the communication link. "Enemy sighted, and he may have seen the human with me."

"Wait, what?" Mirage responded in confusion through the link. "You spotted Transit?"

"Possibly…" Saphira covered her mouth as she swallowed after responding to Mirage. "Um…we did stop at a gas station, and there's a bus stop across from it. And I noticed the feeling of being watched, and a bus was there."

"Did you not sense his signal, Bumblebee?" Optimus questioned bluntly, clearly annoyed that Bumblebee might have located Transit, but failed to notice.

"Negative."

"Transit's been toying with us, Optimus. He shields his signal, then lowers the shield and puts it back again. But…there is another concern now." Arcee seemed very concerned by the information that they had been given by both Saphira and Bumblebee. "You said you were being watched when you got out at the gas station just before, correct?"

Saphira nodded. "Yeah. That's correct. And when I left the station, the bus was not there and nor was the feeling of being watched. I honestly thought it was just Bee, but…no…I think we might have seen Transit. And he might have seen me with Bumblebee."

Optimus growled through the link, unhappy that Saphira might have been seen. "Now Transit knows of our liability…" She frowned, unhappy that Optimus referred to her as a liability. "He would not have expected us to have a human in our midst. This is so frustrating…and I know you had needed to use the bathroom as well. Hmm…" He seemed to be thinking on what they should do. "Bumblebee, Mirage, Arcee…meet me back at the wharf now. Stop trying to find Transit, Bumblebee. We need to now think on what needs to be done."

"Okay, boss," Mirage said in a slightly sarcastic tone. "We've been doing okay, but I will listen to whatever else you want to say."

"Mirage, don't be a fool!" Arcee snapped in irritation. "While we never needed to deal with a human…" Ouch. "If Transit gets to Saphira, and tries to harm or kill her, it will be on us if we allow that to happen. I agree with Optimus on this. Saphira is a liability to us, and now that liability can be exploited."

Saphira was a little annoyed, but she completely understood why they felt this way about her. She was their responsibility, to a point, so that they wouldn't be found out by humans. But now it seems that Transit could have found out about her existence. And she truthfully did not know how to feel about it. She knew she should feel concerned by it, but she didn't know much about him. Plus, Optimus has yet to explain more of their past for her to truly and utterly understand the danger she could be in.

"I don't like you guys calling her a liability," Mirage said gently, sounding hurt that they would call her that. "It was my fault that we have to watch over her in the first place. Shouldn't that make me the liability?"

"Mirage, it's fine. I get it." Saphira knew that she was just trying to sound confident. "I am a liability. I am a walking, talking liability…I've been that way my whole life. So they're right, and I am really not that upset. If Transit decides to use me as a means to hurt you guys…I am going to guess he could do that."

"And that is why we must now adjust a few things," Optimus said bluntly. "I am pleased the human understands her position here. Roll out, and regroup at the wharf for further discussion of the matter. Do not delay unnecessarily."

Saphira took another bite of her burrito. She really wasn't mad at Optimus. If he felt the need to change a few things, she fully understood. After all, if they did not want her to fall victim to Transit, they needed to ensure that they take the precautions. And she thought they were, but it must not have been enough. She took a deep breath and sighed deeply. She did not know if she and Bumblebee would get to see the movie tonight, but she was not worried. There were other screen times that they could see of the Lion King. So all was not lost.