Grapefruit

"Tonic."
.

Deidara found himself daydreaming more than he'd thought possible. Sometimes he thought about the past, like their first meeting, or when they ate sticky, chewy dango at some nowhere shop. Other times he mused on the future, imagining them working together in synchrony, defeating their common enemies. He'd see them bickering over nothing while in each other's arms. But mostly, he wondered about the 'what ifs'. What if Tobi wanted him back? What if Tobi was getting sick of him? What if Tobi didn't know what love was?

He played with the ring on his finger.

Deidara had lied to Zetsu. He wasn't loyal to the Akatsuki. He was loyal to his art and nothing else. He couldn't promise to be by them forever. Saying the words honestly would have just made him feel chained down. Deidara had the tendency to break promises, so he hardly ever made them in the first place. But the thought of walking away from Tobi hurt him. He didn't think he'd be ditching his partner anytime soon. Or that's what he used to think. Now he wasn't so sure. Deidara was happy with Tobi, but he stupidly got too attached. He felt this weight over his shoulders, and it pressed down against him every moment he spent with Tobi. Maybe it was time to go.

"Deidara-senpai! Look!"

Deidara glanced up from his hands. He'd been sitting down on some rock along the edge of a river while Tobi played with the aquatic life, for some reason having opted to revert to his more traditional personality.

Tobi was holding onto a beautifully coloured fish, each scale reflecting an array of colours under the sunlight.

"Isn't it exquisite?"

It really did sparkle prettily. Deidara replied with a hint of a smile, "Yeah, hm."

Tobi let the fish go, carefully placing it back in the water so it could breathe. It was a few minutes later when the man pulled himself out of the river, sopping wet from the waist down and hardly seeming to notice.

"Wow, all that strenuous exercise has me feeling famished," Tobi patted his stomach.

Deidara gave him a look, "Uh huh."

"I'm thinking we could have a huge feast! With rice, and beans, and tonkatsu, and dumplings, and oh – dessert. Lots and lots of dessert. Yum! Oranges and grapefruit sound delicious. I wonder if there's a village nearby..." Tobi trailed off, looking around.

"Tobi, come here, hm," Deidara waved him over with one hand.

He blatantly, purposefully ignored the fluttering in his stomach and how his heart jumped right up his throat when Tobi walked closer, obediently asking, "Yes, senpai?"

"Uh... I uh..." Deidara cursed himself for staring into the eyehole, "I..."

"Are you okay?" Tobi tilted his head.

No, I'm not and it's all your fault, you dick, is what he wanted to say, but instead what came out was, "Take off your cloak."

"W-what?!" Tobi took a step back.

Shit, that came out wrong.

"So it can dry, hm. Obviously," Deidara held out his hand, acting like there was nothing wrong with what he said, "Hand it over."

Tobi still hesitated. Then after one more brief moment, he placed his gloved fingers on the hidden closure of the uniform and unzipped the thing, ever-so-slowly, like he knew exactly what he was doing. Deidara didn't doubt he did. There was someone else under that mask, someone who was astute and clever. Wordlessly, Tobi shrugged the cloak off his shoulders and handed it to Deidara. As tempted as he was to look down, he couldn't. Tobi's gaze was intense, so intense Deidara felt it from the depth of shadows that hid his eye. Deidara had to swallow. Tobi was the one to break the stare, but of course that meant Deidara's eyes dropped right down. Because of the water, Tobi's shirt clung to his tapered waist and even lower. Why did Deidara think this was a good idea again? Right, because Tobi was prone to making messes like a wet dog, and he would complain about how uncomfortable he was for hours, instead of finding a solution.

Needing a distraction, Deidara wrung the cloak. It was almost as drenched as the time Tobi swam with the Sanbi.

Tobi made a show of watching the pool of water get squeezed out of the thick fabric – but he also turned around and how the hell could anyone's ass be that round – before pointing, "This'll take forever to dry!"

"We've got time, hm," Deidara brushed him off, throwing the cloak over the rocks. It was sunny that day, so it'd dry up eventually. They hadn't planned on going anywhere for a few hours anyways.

"But this is boring!" he whined.

Deidara smirked, but turned away to hide it from view, "Are you implying that I'm boring? Ha! You're not as loyal as you make yourself out to be, hm."

"Oh my gosh, no way! Never. You're the most interesting person in the whole world!"

Deidara teased, "That's all? I'm just 'interesting'?"

"Oh no, no, definitely not! Boring is the last thing you are. Do you know who was boring? Sasori was so boring. You're nothing like him. You're totally fun, senpai. You're the best artist too – the only master of bombs! And you're the most handsome – wait, you're fishing for compliments, aren't you?"

"You were the one who was fishing earlier, hm," Deidara stated, unashamed to admit to himself that he liked everything Tobi said about him.

"Good point," Tobi fiddling with the armour plating against his legs, "Do you miss Sasori?"

"Miss isn't the word I'd use, hm. Sometimes I think about him," Deidara thought about his grudging respect for the late artist, "But not much, recently. Death had a collar around his neck, as much as he tried to tell himself it was just a necklace. It was about time someone pulled the leash in."

Tobi sounded really sad when whispered, "I need advice, senpai. How do you... move on, if someone important to you dies?"

"Wouldn't know. No one's ever been important to me before, hm," Deidara explained, wondering if Tobi would share more about his past, "Till now, I guess."

"Do you mean me?" Tobi asked brightly.

"No, Kakuzu," Deidara frowned, suddenly wishing he didn't say what he did. He was nervous, "Yes, you. Hm."

Tobi said his usual line, "I love you too, senpai."

"Don't say that."

"Why not?" he sulked.

"Don't say it if you don't mean it," Deidara noticed how serious he sounded, so quickly amended himself, "You put a mockery on the word. I love my art. You don't love me."

"But I do. I love you."

Deidara blew up into a fierce red. Why was Tobi acting like this Tobi again? The secret was out, there was no point in it.

At his lack of reply, Tobi's gloved fingers squeezed his cheek before he could stop it, "Aw, so cute! Is all this mushy stuff embarrassing you?"

Deidara ripped himself away from the fishy smelling hand and rubbed his cheek, "Stop that!"

"Or what? You'll blow me up?" Tobi sing-songed.

"Maybe I learned a few tricks while you were away, hm. Wipe that arrogant smile off your face," Deidara was already up on his feet, hands in his clay pouches, "Don't test me!"

"Me? Smiling?" Tobi said from under his mask, "I'm an angry person with no sense of humour, just like you. Why would I be smiling?"

"..."

"..."

Tobi took a fearful step back.

"Katsu!"

The explosion was heard from miles away.

It was a bit later, by about two hours, when Tobi crawled up next to Deidara and sat down, with not so much as a hair out of place. He couldn't fathom how he hadn't recognized the signs; Tobi had been blatantly obvious. Back when Deidara threw explosives at Tobi, and the man disappeared for an x amount of time, he was probably doing his duties as the so-called Akatsuki leader.

He inspected his partner. The air around him had shifted. Deidara was left wondering what he'd been up to. Either he had changed his attire too, or the heat from the blast had quickened the drying process, because his clothes now looked crisp. Maybe Tobi should have worn the cloak earlier, then it'd have dried out too. Still, the water had seeped out of the cloak well enough, thanks to the sun. Deidara tossed the mildly damp fabric to Tobi, who put it on without question.

"You haven't lost your touch."

It was the Uchiha with him now. Deidara side-eyed him, "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"It's been awhile since I've last had a good mission. You're the one giving out orders, aren't you? Give me some, hm."

Tobi leaned back until he was lying down. He stretched his arms and put his hands under his head before he bluntly said, "Pein will be going after the nine-tails."

"He's going to fight?" Deidara forgot about his own boredom, suddenly excited because Pein had never fought seriously since his admission to the organization. Jiraiya didn't count, because Deidara only found out after the battle was over. Maybe this time he could watch, or better yet, fight with him. The nine-tails didn't stand a chance. Deidara grinned, "He's going to use the Rinnegan?!"

"What about the Sharingan?" Tobi asked, sounding just a tad too pouty. Deidara noticed the little slip. Maybe fake-Tobi wasn't all that fake.

Deidara scoffed, "Overrated, hm."

The Sharingan was a work of art, though he'd never admit it out loud. Tobi didn't need his ego stroked. But come on, who didn't find the Rinnegan amazing? It was one of the rarest kekkei genkai.

"That was what you said last time," Tobi looked at him. And Deidara was positive Tobi's sight was directed at him because he was staring straight into the red eye. The Uchiha lowered his voice, "How do you feel now?"

Deidara felt the weight of the tiny, folded paper under his cloak. He did his best to ignore it, "Now you're fishing for compliments, hm."

"So..." Tobi dragged out the word, and murmured lowly from under his mask, "Am I not going to catch any?"

"You already caught some," Deidara's toes curled. Were they flirting?! Did this count as flirting?

"They must have slipped away. Care to help me grab some more?" Tobi leaned on his elbow. The red stare from under the mask made him nervous. Maybe because the Sharingan was kinda hot. Yeah, he said it. Tobi's Sharingan was goddamn attractive.

Deidara didn't doubt he was flushed, "You're cheating, hm."

"How am I cheating?" Tobi asked.

Tobi wouldn't get him to say the words out loud, no matter how tempting it was.

Deidara reached up and shoved his finger through the eyehole, just carefully enough to not accidentally stab him in the eye. He got the reaction he wanted though, as Tobi jolted in surprise.

He smirked, "Your Sharingan isn't as cool as you make it out to be, hm. Especially if you didn't see that coming."

Smirk molding to a grin, Deidara pulled out his finger, only for Tobi's hand to latch onto his wrist.

Tobi tutted, "You'll admit it someday."

The gloved fingers curled all the way around his wrist easily, but the grip was gentle and delicate. That didn't mean it didn't burn his skin and send little sparks right up his arm. Deidara struggled to speak, "My art. Is cool. Not – not your Sharingan. Hm."

Tobi let go of his wrist, so his arm dropped limply to his side. Deidara resisted the temptation to rub his arm, willing the imprint of the touch away.

"What I forgot to tell you was that my Sharingan allows me to read minds whenever I please."

Deidara's stomach dropped, "Wait, what?"

Did he hear that right?

Tobi didn't quite laugh, but a few huffs of air escaped his lips, "I'm joking. It's a joke. Tobi makes jokes all the time."

Deidara recovered, "But not this Tobi. Hm."

Tobi sat up slowly, thinking. Eventually, sounding taken-aback, he agreed, "You're right. This is new. I've never - not since..."

Deidara didn't say anything, sensing Tobi was thinking about his traumatizing experience of being half-crushed by a boulder. Maybe Tobi was an expert at taking it easy, but the Uchiha underneath was too solemn for his own good. He was finally learning how to loosen up.

"I'm supposed to be gloomy, aren't I?" his tone was light-hearted, and once again Deidara was reminded of the sunshine-and-rainbows-Tobi.

"You're an imposter, hm," Deidara attempted to frown, but Tobi's acceptance of his positive feelings were infectious, so his own smile fought its way out. The end product was probably some deranged expression, "How dare you tarnish the Akatsuki name?"

His partner crossed his legs, putting a hand to his chin in a thinking pose. Tobi was really shining through the Uchiha now. Whoever was out, they muttered, "That's suspicious. Deidara's never cared about the Akatsuki's reputation. Hm... Maybe you're the imposter."

Deidara sputtered.

"As the leader of the Akatsuki, it's my responsibility to handle punishments for insubordination. Deidara, relying on a clone to take his place? That is treachery," Tobi stood, eye glowing brightly, "Any last words, imposter?"

"Please, have mercy, hm. I worship the Sharingan. Its beauty surpasses that of an explosion. You're the strongest shinobi of them all..." He leaned back in the grass, imitating Tobi's earlier pose, then looked up at him and grinned from ear to ear, finishing off with, "Senpai."

Tobi was silent for a minute. Then he crouched down next to him, and Deidara's heart roared at the feeling of cold metal pressed up against his neck. He was itching for violence, a good fight.

A red stare pierced right into his wide eyes, "You're not Deidara."

The way Tobi said his name had him breathing harder. He tried to keep his neck steady, but the sharp edge of the kunai slid against his throat. It cut. Deidara hardly felt it. He was a bit more distracted by the sight of his partner. Tobi didn't even know what he was doing to him, did he?

When Tobi's other hand landed on his shoulder, Deidara suddenly found it difficult to think. Tobi was seducing him without even trying. Deidara hadn't realized he was this touch starved. It really would have been better if he was oblivious to Tobi's hidden appeal; ignorance was bliss and all that. He should have just left when he had the chance.

How was he supposed to leave when Tobi was this perfect?

The blade tilted, so the flat edge pressed up against his jaw.

His breath hitched.

"Where's Deidara?" Tobi said it with such sobriety, Deidara had to second guess himself.

Tobi was bluffing... right?

Deidara felt the kunai disappear – the timing was fishy, maybe Tobi could mind-read – but it was replaced with a gloved hand. Tobi patted his cheek, once, twice, before standing up again.

"Your expression was hilarious."

Immediately, Deidara lifted himself up, "You're a piece of shit."

"And you relax me. I forget about all my troubles when I'm tormenting you," Tobi said, sounding calm. He reached out and touched his own neck, before gesturing somewhere under Deidara's chin, "Don't take it personally."

"Thanks, hm," Deidara glared.

Tobi's hint reminded him of the warm, wet sensation of blood running along his skin and down his neck. Deidara pressed his palm against it, and the mouth on his hand immediately began licking it clean. He hoped Tobi wasn't dense enough to use the kunai he salvaged from that poisonous battle site.

"You don't relax me, but I enjoy your company," Deidara said honestly, "Sometimes, hm."

He couldn't remember the last time he felt excitement over something other than explosions. Deidara felt like he finally belonged somewhere. Even if Tobi didn't want him, he wouldn't discard him. They were past that. And as far as Deidara was concerned, they had each other's backs.

He wasn't going to linger any longer on this. He'd be direct with Tobi and see what went from there. The worst that could happen was that Tobi told him his feelings were pointless. And if Tobi didn't feel the same way? Deidara wouldn't blame him. It would still suck. A lot.

His train of thought halted where it was.

Rejection wasn't the worst possible scenario.

What if Tobi planned this? What if he expected Deidara to fall for him – with all that hyper character analysis he did and those sweet words he pulled – in order to use him?

Deidara frowned. He was looking too deeply into things. Tobi had already proven that he'd crossed Deidara off of his list. More fears crossed Deidara's mind, but he smothered them before they could settle into his bones. If he was going to be honest about how he felt, he should just let Tobi know now.

Before he could lose his nerves, he sucked in a breath, ready to spill it all out, but his partner interrupted, "Our job will be to get as many shinobi into Konoha as possible."

Damn.

Their moment was over. He missed his chance.

It took a second for Deidara to remember their slightly more professional conversation earlier, "Into? Don't you mean out of?"

"Into," Tobi repeated. There was something darker hiding behind voice, something Deidara didn't think he'd heard from him before. The hatred Tobi held for Konoha was strikingly vehement.

Finally, an Uchiha who wasn't afraid to express emotions.

Deidara didn't linger on those thoughts for too long, instead allowing for Tobi's words to sink in. Could Pein really take on the entire village and capture the nine-tails? Was that the power of the Rinnegan? Deidara had easily taken on Suna, but their line of defense had been explosive arrows.

"How are we going to do that? If we tell them we're coming, won't they hide the jinchuuriki?" he asked. Deidara remembered the raw chakra of that Konoha kid, and how he lost control of it due to his rage. All that commotion for the one-tailed host, the one who took out his arm. Kakashi Hatake had been guarding the brat like he was a lost puppy. Konoha would without a doubt be doing the same.

"They'll be hiding the nine-tails either way. But it won't matter," Tobi explained, "They'll need him. They won't have any other choice; the boy will be their last resort."

Deidara thought about Pein, recalling the stone eyes and their last conversation.

"What's Pein really trying to do? Control the world? I thought he wanted to end the 'cycle of hatred', not string it together and wear it around his neck," Deidara questioned, feeling the edge of something stormy touch his mind. It was nice forgetting about Tobi's ulterior motives once in a while, but they always came back. He added bitterly, "Like you do, hm."

Tobi sighed in displeasure, the soft sound almost inaudible from under his mask. He pretended not to hear Deidara's jab, "Pein is under the assumption that the beasts are being captured to create the ten-tails, an ultimate weapon of mass destruction, to be used as leverage against the rest of the world."

"The ten-tails?" Deidara's mouth parted. Unifying the beasts into one? That was impressive. And Pein had wanted to control the world with it? He was delusional. Deidara reminded him, "Tobi. It won't work, hm."

"The Juubi, once revived, will have immeasurable power," Tobi said, not listening to him. As though he was caught by the gaze of his own Sharingan, Tobi was in his own world, "But there's a second half to the plan, something I've kept from him."

Deidara inhaled deeply and exhaled with just as much force.

Here they go again.

He impatiently waited for Tobi to continue, not liking where this was going.

"The Moon's Eye Plan. I'm going to use the Juubi's final form and the moon to cast an all-encompassing genjutsu. Each person will live in a world universe of their own making. Time, as we know it, will stop. Reality will end, and the world will be without hatred for eternity."

Deidara admired his passion, but what the fucking hell? Tobi's dedicated his whole life for this?! Damn Tobi and his Sharingan! Deidara had thought the notion of Tobi aiming to control the world was bad, but this – trying to replace it – with something not real – with the Sharingan – was flat out sickening. Every life had a conclusion. No one could restrain the fate of nature. Not even Tobi.

"Don't you get it? You've been brainwashed, hm. Wake the fuck up!"

Deidara had been stupid trying to change someone. Why was he surprised it didn't work? Decade-old ideologies didn't just flip like a coin. He shouldn't have expected anything out of Tobi.

"The world is hell. There needs to be peace. Everyone will be happy. You too, Deidara."

"You want me trapped in a fake world while the real me rots away! That isn't true art! Open your eyes, you goddamn fool! The Sharingan blinds you!"

"It's for the greater good. A utopia can exist. There's a way, and I'd be an imbecile to miss the opportunity. I'm doing this for you. For everyone."

"Don't assume you know what I want!"

He was angry because he thought Tobi understood. He was angry because Tobi put the Moon's Eye Plan first. The Uchiha didn't get it. He was angry because he fell for this man. He was just so angry. He goes for the punch, and since Tobi hadn't expected it – or chose not to dodge – the blow hit.

The mask didn't crack under the pressure, and that just pissed him off more. He pivoted on his foot and aimed a sharp kick, but Tobi ducked and made a move to grab him. Deidara shoved him away. Tobi didn't dodge the next jab, pulling Deidara's arm through him. Deidara hurried to pull away, but Tobi was quick to deliver a brutal punch of his own. Deidara tilted his jaw just out of the way, and it brought him eye to eye with a blood-red Sharingan. He snarled.

They fought, and fought, and fought. Deidara was getting even angrier as each blow passed right through him.

"Deidara – "

"Shut up!" he hissed, "Shut up or I'll kill you."

"Hold on – "

"You've threatened my final moment. You've cast aside my art! I won't have it, hm. You Uchiha are all the same. Unenlightened, arrogant, selfish," Deidara mouths were already stuffed with clay. He jumped several feet back, settling on a clay bird he molded.

"Deidara, listen to me. You're all I have left. I can't lose you," Tobi never sounded more desperate as he watched Deidara go airborne. A spider bomb phased through his torso, "But you're determined to die. This is the only way."

Tobi needed him? Bullshit. Tobi needed anyone in his life. If he did - if he opted to create a version of Deidara without flaws - then it wasn't really him, it was a modified copy. Deidara's art was a part of him, and Tobi wouldn't take that away.

"Katsu!" Deidara watched his sticky bomb explode behind Tobi, who didn't flinch at the blast. He tossed a handful, even though he knew the explosives would go right through him. He shouted, "We all die eventually! There is art in a fleeting moment – "

"You've let your philosophies consume you."

"You're a fucking hypocrite, hm. Katsu!"

The smoke and debris from his bomb cleared up, but unsurprisingly, Tobi stood there unharmed, having not moved an inch.

The Sharingan was visible even with their height difference and the dust in the air. Deidara stared down at it, into him, with a piece of himself missing.

He'd fallen in love with Tobi, of all things.

"That won't be me in your genjutsu. Your illusion will be a cheap copy of my reflection, hm. It'll be nothing but a shadow. You're no better than Sasori, Tobi, wanting to dance with puppets, hm."

He had hoped this ignorant fool would see the depth and reality of a moment's time.

Deidara continued, watching the tomoe of the Sharingan spin rapidly, "But I can't speak for you. If that's your perspective on my art, so be it, hm. However, I will not be trapped under your genjutsu. I won't be satisfied with an artificial Tobi and superficial art, hm. True art is an explosion!"

The bird flapped its wings, causing Tobi's cloak to flutter behind him. He didn't speak, because Deidara didn't let him.

"You're untouchable, hm. But I'm not," a grin stretched over his face, but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes. It was time for his masterpiece. This was his moment; this was what he needed to show Tobi, "I'll make you see."

He knew that Tobi would evade it. He wanted Tobi to evade it. But as long as he saw it for what it was, truly experienced it, felt the heat, the soul—Deidara would die a dream death.

"Deidara, wait."

The bird flapped its wings again. Both Akatsuki cloaks flapped with the gust of air. Deidara saw the Sharingan fade away, the last trace of red cowering behind the darkness beneath the mask.

"Kill me too."

Tbh the title of this chapter should have been "Fish".

I don't have many exams left, so chapters will be posted more frequently, yay! Also, if you want to see any noob fanart I've made in my surge of TobiDei withdrawal, hit up my deviantart account. And bother me on tumblr. I need more friends. I've been thinking of starting another fanfic, but we'll see. It might be better to wait until this one ends.

Also, discussion time. I know Obito's a god in terms of power and intelligence, but can we take a moment to appreciate how Deidara can create as many MOAB equivalent explosives as he pleases, with his mouth and teeth, and then still look cute while doing it? Can we all agree on this?