Chapter 15

Kate's MRI was "fine". That was what Doctor Foreman had told her. That was the exact word Doctor Finch had repeated and that was the word that Wilson had used with her too. "Fine." Kate didn't think that meant what they thought she thought it meant. If it was good, or clear, they would have said that, right? And every time she'd brought it up with Wilson he'd tried to change the subject. It had been five days and she'd asked him every day. Yesterday, when Kate brought it up Wilson even asked her to help roll a joint for a patient. Kate had said yes and it wasn't until Wilson was literally about to show her what to do that realized what he was asking. That's when Kate definitely knew that the "fine" wasn't fine at all. But she wasn't getting specifics from any of her doctors…or her father. So here she was, pacing back and forth House's office waiting for him to be free. Kate was walking the entire corridor, but she could tell she was annoying them. Well, at least annoying House.

He was still talking with them when he came over to the door and opened it as she was coming back down from the elevator and yelled, "I swear to god if you make another pass at this door I'm going to beat your legs off with my cane."

Kate stopped, her sneakers squeaking on the floor. She smiled innocently at House from where she stopped.
"What the hell do you want?"

"Uh…" Kate suddenly found the words impossible to find.

"House?" asked Foreman. "You're not even listening."

"Barely," House said to Foreman. "Get in here," he said to Kate.

Kate walked into the office.

"What do you want?" asked House.

Kate eyed House, then looked at Foreman who looked like he'd rather be anywhere but in the room with her. "Is my brain really 'fine'?" she asked and as she did, she realized how stupid she sounded.

Foreman looked away, but House stared at her. "Of course not."

"House," Foreman said.

"Well, she's not an idiot. Although it did take her five days to ask me."

"What's wrong with my brain?" Kate asked. She looked at Foreman but he avoided her gaze.

"It's exactly the same," said House.

Kate frowned. "What?"

"It's exactly the same as months ago."

"And that's…bad?"

"Duh."

"How bad is the same?"

"Well, I'm not a neurologist…" House said, dramatically turning to Foreman, "buuuut."

Foreman rolled his eyes and sighed as he looked at Kate and crossed his arms. "It means treating the white matter with just therapy and medication isn't working. It means if we may have to go in again."

"Surgery?" Kate asked.

"Yes."

"And there's no other option?"
"Your immune system is pretty shot still, your body isn't great at fighting anything off, it's so busy repairing everything else, making sure you're not getting any hospital infections that there's nothing left."

"Well that doesn't sound…good."

"That's why we said it was fine."

"Oh leave the poor girl alone," House said. "I got something that'll take your mind off it. It'll be fun. I promise."

Kate looked at House and raised an eyebrow. "What?"

Foreman left and House added a green jacket, and a trucker cap to his person.

"Are you Inspector Gadget now?" Kate asked.

"Inspector Gadget wishes," House said, putting on sunglasses. "Let's go."

Kate followed House but couldn't figure out where they were going. He carried a few things, but Kate was standing on the wrong side of him to see. They arrived at the lecture hall and Kate frowned. "Why are we here?" Kate asked.

"Let's go in and find out," House said with a grin.

"You said this would take my mind off things?"

"Oh, it will."

Kate doubted it, but held the door open for House and then went in. They sat near the back of the theatre. There were quite a few people in the hall; Kate was amazed this many people in the area cared about what she assumed was just a medical seminar. Cuddy came onto the stage, looking awkward and nervous. Kate eyed House, who just stared forward. Kate turned to face Cuddy on the stage.

"Thank you for all coming to today's lecture by Dr. Phillip Weber. Who is our guest today at our hospital to talk about... Headaches."

Kate eyed House again, this time with a grin. He grinned back and said quietly, "Fun, right?"

Kate smiled and turned back to Cuddy. "Dr. Weber is at the Weber Center for Pain. That makes sense." Cuddy mumbles something but then continued, "Weber. Erm, so please welcome Dr. Weber."

"Thank you Dr... Cuddy," Weber said, and he pretended to check for Cuddy's name.

The audience around Kate and House laughed. Cuddy glared up at House as she left.

"What did you do?" Kate asks him.

House just smiled.

Wilson suddenly appeared next to Kate. "What the hell are you doing here?" he asked her quietly and sat down.

"House said this would be fun," Kate shrugged.

Wilson leaned forward to properly look at House, he took in the outfit. "You've never been to one of these things in your life, who is this guy?"
House shrugged. "No idea."

"What's with the outfit?"

"Sudden chills, and light sensitivity. Inexplicable."

"He put it on right before we came here," Kate said.

House elbowed Kate, who elbowed him right back.

Weber continued talking to the hall, "I received my medical degree at Johns Hopkins University, where I studied under Brightman and Gilmar."

"Hmm! He must be good. You went to Hopkins and studied under Brightman and Gilmar," said Wilson.
House shushed him.

"This helped me to win the Doyle internship at the Mayo Clinic."

"You were supposed to get the Doyle internship." Said Wilson, looking between House and the Doctor Weber out front. "This guy's von Lieberman?! The guy got you thrown out for cheating?"

"You cheated?" Kate asked.

House looked down at her, as if she was crazy for thinking he wouldn't cheat. "The Dean threw me out. Von Lieberman just ratted on me."

"This guy's name is Weber, not von Lieberman."

"I call him Weber von Lieberman. Way eviler. Shh."

Weber continued, "-and the receptors have improved the acute treatment of migraines. To this point, the prevention of-"

"So what's the plan?" asked Wilson. "You going to wait 'til he bends over then make a fart sound?"

"I'm not here about the past, he's a bad scientist."

"Well you cheated off him, how bad can he be?"

"He got the answer wrong."

Kate stifled a laugh.

Weber continued on and Kate wasn't exactly sure what he was trying to prove but it sounded impossible. What she knew about headaches and migraines from Doug's studies…it was either ridiculous or a miracle. Migraines were caused by so many factors, how could one drug help so many people?

"Uhh... you stalked this guy for 20 years just for this shot to humiliate him?" Wilson asked.

"Shh! I'm trying to learn," said House.

"-vessels without significant rebound," Weber continued on.

"He doesn't even know what that means," said House.

"You're going to interrupt him, aren't you?" asked Wilson.

"If I have a question."

"And what's that going to accomplish?"

"Why can't you just enjoy this? Why can't you just be happy for me? Kate's having a fabulous time."

"I'm just happy to be doing something different in the day," Kate said.

Wilson frowned at her. "You have got to find less debilitating outlets than humiliating people! I... hear bowling is more fun than stalking."

"But I'm better at this."

"He's right," Kate said to Wilson who looked at her disapprovingly.

Weber continued on, "If P is less than point zero..."

The door to the lecture theatre opened, Foreman came in and crouched down in the row next to House.

"Blow a ton of money on a plasma TV?" Wilson offered to House.

"We found a subarachnoid bleed," Foreman said.

"Bleed in the head isn't causing seizures," House said.

"It could be," Wilson said. "10% would damage the cerebral cortex and have seizure."

"Or bacterial meningitis," Foreman said.

"Viral encephalitis?" Wilson offered.

"There's no way to tell without-" Foreman started.

"Shut up!" House said, a little too loudly.

Weber stopped and turned to the audience. "Excuse me?"

"Not you," House said back.

"You know if my lecture is interrupting your meeting I can wait," Weber said.

"Bahatchat kria," said House. "As your people say in India, 'preciate it." He turned back to Foreman. "We'll figure out why later. And fix the bleed or he dies. Talk to you in a couple of hours." Foreman nodded and left.

"Terimaki," House said and put his hands together and nodded his head. Wilson frowned in confusion and Kate had to put her hand over her mouth to stop from laughing.

Weber continued with his lecture and Wilson was still worried about what House was going to do, but also to why Kate did actually seem to be having a good time. In a lecture. A medical lecture.

"Why did House bring you here?" Wilson asked her.

Kate shrugged. "He said it would be fun," she repeated. "That it would get my mind off things."

"What kind of things?"

"He told me what fine actually meant," said Kate.

Wilson frowned and then it dawned on him. "You told Kate?" he hissed at House.

"Nobody else was telling her the truth," said House.

"That doesn't mean you get to."

"I'm a doctor. I do no harm."

"You do harm all the time," Kate said.

"And you're not Kate's doctor," said Wilson.

"But I am a doctor."

Wilson rolled his eyes.

"It's fine," Kate said.

"Really?" Wilson asked, a little shocked.

"I guess. What else is new? I live in a hospital. I'm not surprised I'm not getting better."

Wilson thought of something to say but came up with nothing. Doctor Weber continued, "And with a P value of less than point zero zero one, we have strong statistical evidence that this drug prevents migraine headaches without daily administration."

"Err, excuse me doctor," House called out.

"He knows his field better than you do," Wilson muttered.

"It's always been my understanding that err, unless you follow a daily regimen, no drug can prevent a migraine," House said.

"That's why they call it a breakthrough," said Weber.

"That's why YOU call it a breakthrough."

Kate suddenly felt in the spotlight. Everyone was staring at them. Well, House, but she was right next to him. And Doctor Weber didn't look happy. At all.

"No, the... err pharmaceutical company sponsoring my clinical trials also hails it as a breakthrough," said Doctor Weber.

"I'm sure your wife and lawyer do too. Is there anybody who doesn't stand to make a fortune from it calling a breakthrough?"

"Who are you?"

"Just a lunatic who desperately needs a hobby," Wilson muttered again.

Kate smiled.

"And how exactly did these studies work? You give this drug to a bunch of people and if they don't get a migraine you go "voila, my drug works"?" He pointed to a woman sitting in front of him. "Erm, excuse me miss, uh do you have cancer?" She frowned and shook her head. House looked back at Weber. "Wow!" House pointed to her drink.

"Mango juice prevents cancer!"

"Uh, perhaps I should have taken my medication before this lecture," said Weber.

House gave a loud, fake, high-pitched laugh.

"We had a very specific control group," Weber explained. "Chronic migraine sufferers, I don't have time to go through all the math right now, but the incidence was dramatically-"

"Sure, in India. Two plus two equals five there, right?"

"Do I know you?"

Kate wished she had brought a video camera, this would be great to relive when she wasn't feeling so nervous about what was going to happen. She wondered if she asked Wilson if he'd get her one.

"I know your math skills. They blow," said House.

"Touche," said Wilson.

"You sound very familiar," said Weber.

"Why did you publish it in an obscure journal in India? Why not publish it in really, really cool head cases of South Philly?" asked House.

"Neuroscience New Delhi is a respected journal," said Weber.

"Yeah. The guy running Slurp 'N' Gulp tells me it's one of the best."

Wilson put his hands over Kate's ears. "Get a hooker. Anything," he said to House.

"I heard you," Kate whispered to Wilson when he took his hands away. Wilson just stared ahead.

"See I'm thinking that publishing studies is probably the easiest way to get a pharmaceutical company to give you a reach around," said House. "And choosing a journal that no one can actually read well that's... that's shrewd."

While House has been talking, Weber had been walking up the steps to House. "I know I know you."

Wilson face palmed with one hand, and put the other on top of Kate's arm as Weber came close to them.

"Sure you do. Dick," said House.

"The name's Phillip."

"Oh, my bad. Something to do with your face. I always think your name is Dick."

Weber finally realized. "House?!"

"Here," House said as if he was in school.

"Medical school was 20 years ago, give it a rest, grow up."

"Yeah, you were always the grown-up. Do the responsible thing. Tattletale!"

"You cheated!"

"I cheated then, you're cheating now! Your drug doesn't work."

"Oh yes, you would like to believe that because it plays right into your fantasy."

"I tested it."

Kate and Wilson both looked at House.

"Oh really? What were your parameters? Where's your study?" asked Weber.

House looked at Wilson. "Room 2134."

Wilson knew that number. Why?

"One patient?" asked Weber.

"The coma patient?" Wilson said when it dawned on him.

House gave Wilson a look.

"You haven't changed a bit," said Weber. "You took shortcuts in Med school; you're taking shortcuts now. You cannot test this on an abnormal brain."

"That's so close-minded," said House. "He's not abnormal, he's... special."

"Cerebral cortex atrophies in coma patients. You need live conscious people. You don't know everything, House."

Kate grinned at House. "That was fun, thanks." She didn't get yelled at once. It wasn't so bad.

"And you brought your kid to this? You're insane," said Weber.

"Gotta keep the munchkin entertained somehow," said House.

Kate grinned up at Weber. Weber just rolled his eyes. "Get out. All three of you."

Wilson instantly stood up and practically dragged Kate up too. "House," Wilson hissed.

House rolled his eyes but followed Kate and Wilson out of the lecture hall.

Wilson had to go work, House was adamant he knew how to prove Weber wrong so Kate said she'd go to her room. But of course she didn't. She was feeling pretty good for the first time in a while, so she headed down to see a patient.

"They haven't sent you home yet?" Kate asked, leaning on the doorjamb of Bubba Ray's room.

He took his eyes off the TV and smiled at Kate. "It's my guardian angel."

Kate smiled and came into the room. "What the hell are you watching?" she asked.

"I have no idea," said Bubba Ray, "it's in Spanish, but they're very dramatic about everything. I think someone is pregnant, but not to the man she's going to marry. And her…sister, is actually in love with her sister's fiancé and their mother is also sleeping with the father of her daughter's child."

Kate stared at the TV. "That sounds insane."

Bubba Ray shrugged. "It's entertaining." He turned the TV off. "How are you holding up?"

Kate shrugged and sat down on the chair next to his bed. "The same as ever."

"Keep on, carrying on."

"Sure. What about you?"

"Still got my cancer, just having radiation now so, you know, I can move my hands…sometimes."

"They didn't run any of those other tests?" asked Kate.

"What tests?"

"The ones Doctor House wanted to run?"

"Oh some pretty lady doctor and some Aussie guy came in to run a few but they never finished. Boss Lady showed up and told them to scram and they did."

"Oh…"

"Why do you ask?"

Kate shrugged. "Dying sucks. It would be nice if you didn't have to."

"Why's that?"

"I think you might still have one more album in you."

Bubba Ray laughed. A gravelly, painful laugh. "You're a glass half full sorta person, aren't you?"

"Not normally."

"Why the optimism then?"

"I had a good morning," Kate said.

"You should have more of those," said Bubba Ray, "Makes you smile."

"And that's good?"

"You remind me of my own daughter. She was always a happy kid."

Kate smiled politely at that.

"Do you think…do you think the boss lady would let me have some instruments in here? A keyboard perhaps? A guitar?"

Kate grinned. "You want to start working on the final album?"

"I could call it Death Bed."

"That's just morbid."

"Maybe it'll be by death metal era."

"I don't think that's you, sir," said Kate.

"Bobby is fine, Kate," he said.

"Feels wrong."

"Lots of good things do."

Kate wasn't sure that was true anymore.