Reviews:
RonaldM40196867: What I like most about Griffith is his relationship with Guts and the complexity of his character. He's not just some moustache twirling supervillain or some generic anime Demon Lord. To the people in his kingdom he's an angel, their savior, their messiah. But behind that is a tortured man who sacrificed everyone he loved to achieve his dream. He is evil. Undeniably so. But he is still an incredibly interesting character. He's not generic or cliché. He's incredibly unique and masterfully written. I know I'm just a fanfiction author. I am not on Miura's level and I almost certainly never will be. So I can only hope to do Griffith the barest justice as a character in my writing.
Spartastic 4: I wanted to have the Emperor show up at the Elf Island so Guts would have all his equipment and his full party. But considering how the story's been going so far, I might end up having to make him show up sooner. Sometime after Guts gets the Berserker armor is the soonest estimate at the moment. I'll end up having to do some time skips eventually. I just want to make sure I cover the Golden Age and the Eclipse.
SomePervyGuy: I can see why. That would certainly be a good point for the falling out and betrayal in the context of Warhammer 40k. However, there's a problem with it happening after the Emperor shows up. And that problem is the Emperor himself. The moment he saw Griffith, he would figure out Griffith has the Crimson Behelit and see a Godhand Member in the making. At which point he'd get shoved in a stasis unit in the Dark Cells under the Imperial Palace and would get the Lost Primarch treatment. The Godhand are a big deal. They're effectively lesser Warp Gods, like the souls of the Primarchs with none of the safeties or restrictions the Emperor built into the Primarchs to limit them. So the Emperor showing up before the Eclipse would mean the Eclipse couldn't happen. At least not with Griffith using the Band of the Hawk as sacrifices since they probably wouldn't be anywhere near him when the eclipse happened. Even if he hadn't been captured and tortured.
As for the poison... We'll see.
manu111: I like your idea for Guts' Legion. As for Guts and Casca, we'll see.
Guts sat in his little camp in the desert meditating.
Only this was different from the meditation the witch doctor had taught him. It was something he'd learned from some rather secretive sorcerer deep in the deserts of Kushan. He had essentially brought himself to the brink of death to force every last scrap of power from his soul he could muster to fight the poison without actually dying. His heart beat had slowed to an almost dangerous rate. His breathing was incredibly shallow. He had essentially put himself in a deep coma, leaving only the barest scrap of his soul to keep his body functioning at the minimum required to keep himself alive.
He was in pure agony. It felt like he was being flayed alive while impaled on numerous spikes of red hot iron. Liquid fire pulsed through his veins, burning him alive from the inside out. His head felt like it was about to explode. His eyes felt like they were going to burst open. He felt like he was simultaneously suffocating in a vacuum, drowning, and breathing in pure hellfire that scorched his lungs. He felt as though his organs were writhing like worms as metal claws shredded them into a paste inside of him. His bones felt like they were shattering, bending, and melting, and warping into painfully unnatural shapes all at once.
It was the poison, the sorcerer had told him. He said it would try to fight back and that it would hurt. That it would be more painful than anything he had ever experienced in his entire life. And… the sorcerer hadn't been wrong. It was complete and utter hell. The worst thing he had ever experienced. His mind had trouble processing the level of pure unadulterated agony he was in.
In his mind he was a massive beast fighting a horde of pale androgynous things with lashing tongues and crab like claws. The same unholy demons who ripped his skin off and violated him in ways too depraved and twisted for any mortal mind to conjure in the recurring nightmares which he'd suffered from ever since being kidnapped by the cult.
Normally he was bound by chains embedded into his very bones, unable to resist as they tortured and tormented him however they wished. Now… Now he was slaughtering them and the torture he was suffering had grown infinitely worse.
They were like ants to him, but there were six massive figures among the hordes of tiny abominations who inflicted tortures on him he could not have imagined even as he fought against them.
He couldn't be sure if the vision was real and he was actually fighting these things in some spiritual realm or if it was just the way his mind chose to process the pain he was suffering from trying to fight the poison like this.
He didn't particularly care, either. He just kept fighting.
The more he fought the more agitated and desperate the things seemed to become and the worse the pain grew. It didn't matter how much pain he'd been in before, or if he couldn't fathom anything worse than what he was experiencing at any given moment, it always got worse. And he kept pushing forward and fighting regardless.
He wouldn't let these things win. He wouldn't let the poison keep its grip on him. He kept fighting because he wanted it gone and he wouldn't stop until the poison was gone or he couldn't take it anymore and he died.
Stubbornly, he persisted no matter what happened to him or what pain he was forced to endure.
The demons whispered to him, trying to tempt him in every way imaginable. He ignored them. He ignored everything and just kept fighting. The only thing he wanted at that moment was to be rid of the poison. And for that he needed to keep fighting. Even when they offered to free him of his pain and get rid of the poison for him, he ignored them. Even if they were telling the truth that they could or would cure him, he knew it would come at a price that definitely wasn't worth it otherwise they would never have made the offer to begin with.
He kept fighting, kept resisting, kept struggling, kept enduring. He was determined to be free and he was determined to get free on his own terms no matter how much he had to suffer to make that happen. He wanted to be FREE!
He opened his eyes, he was panting from exertion. The pain stayed for a moment before it started to recede. It lingered far longer than it probably should have, but it receded. When it was gone he fell back and looked up at the morning sky. He had been fighting that battle all night. Just as he had been doing every night for the last few weeks ever since learning how to do it.
It was hell but it was worth it. He was making progress. It was slow and agonizing but he was able to push it back just a little bit more every night. When he woke up, it would return to the same old stalemate with his soul unable to push it back any further while the poison was suppressed and unable to make any further progress against him. He could feel himself getting stronger and stronger the more he pushed it back. He had even started growing again. Unfortunately all that extra strength was purely physical. It never helped him the next night when he had to do it all again. Which made the hellish struggle fairly consistent all things considered.
He laid there for a while, resting after the immense spiritual battle he'd just fought for the entire night.
After about an hour he finally got up and started making his breakfast.
He'd long since run out of the preserved foods he'd packed before arriving in Kushan. Instead he had to turn to buying food from the local towns and cities. Fortunately, they did take Midland coin. At least in the port cities and the capital. Random towns and villages didn't.
As he gathered what food he had left, he realized he was running low again. He was gonna have to go buy food from the city again.
After he ate his meager breakfast, he got up, packed his things, and headed to the city. He didn't like leaving anything unattended. He didn't want his stuff getting stolen if he left it alone for too long. Cities, regardless of where in the world you were, were full of thieves. And he was camping right outside of a city since there was no place within the city that had rooms or beds big enough to fit him.
He went to the market and started looking around. As he was perusing, he heard a voice call out to him. "Guts! Guts!"
He looked and saw a young girl and her elderly grandfather. A few days after he arrived in the city, he'd saved the old man from some thugs trying to rob and beat him before helping the old timer get back home safely. The old man had invited him in for dinner and introduced Guts to his family. They were nice people and they grew to like him after the old man told them how Guts had helped him. He was now something of a family friend to these people.
He smiled and waved at them.
He carefully made his way through the crowd. Most people moved out of his way on their own. Unsurprising since he was a giant standing at ten feet and nine inches and completely towered over the crowds.
"Hey. How are you guys doing?" Guts greeted them.
"Oh, quite well… There certainly haven't been any more incidents. What of you? Still fighting your spiritual battles in the night?" The old man asked.
Guts chuckled. "Yeah… Gotta keep fighting until I overcome the poison completely. Even if it hurts." In the weeks he'd been in this city, the old man and his family learned that Guts just sat and meditated in his camp outside the city every night instead of actually sleeping. When they eventually asked why, he liked them enough he'd come to tell them his story and what he went through trying to fight the poison.
"Mm… I don't know what you did in your past life to earn such ill karma to warrant such a punishment in this life, but I pray your next is far kinder to you… Still, you should take a night or two to truly sleep rather than devoting all of your nights to your meditations. Proper rest would serve you well. Perhaps it would give you strength to help you endure your nightly descents into Naraka." The old man suggested.
"Maybe… I'll have to try it and see if the poison progresses any. If it does I won't have a choice but to keep going as I have been." Guts said, accepting the old man's advice just to be polite. He didn't want to tell the old man his dreams wouldn't be any better. He was always plagued by nightmares whenever he got proper sleep. So what difference did it make if he meditated or slept.
The old man nodded understandingly.
Guts looked at the girl next to the old man smiling up at him. "I see you're out with your grand dad today. You out helping him with the store?"
She nodded. "Mhm! Brother and father are busy fixing a big leak in the roof, so I'm helping grandfather for today."
"Sadly, my old bones aren't what they used to be. So I do need help moving crates and the like. She does well when my son and grandson are busy." The old man stated.
Guts nodded. "Well, I'm just in town to pick up a few supplies. I'll probably be moving on pretty soon."
"Ah. It will be sad to see you go. Your absence will be noticed by everyone in the city. Quite literally. It will be quite obvious that there is no longer a towering giant walking amongst us." The old man joked. "I suppose you'll be heading back to Midland then, hm?"
Guts looked at him, a bit confused. "Midland?"
"Yes. Yesterday I overheard the sailors speaking of a civil war occuring in Midland. Apparently the King attempted to violate his own daughter and a nobleman saved her. Is that not why you're leaving?" The old man asked.
Guts shook his head. "No… This is the first I'm hearing of this… Do you know the name of the nobleman who saved the Princess?"
The old man shook his head. "I'm afraid not. I didn't think to ask. If you speak to the sailors you may get an answer, however."
"Yeah, alright. Sorry to cut this short but I need to go figure out what's happening in Midland." Guts told them.
"I understand. I pray you will be able to have peaceful nights soon, my friend." The old man told him.
"Bye, Guts!" The girl called out.
Guts turned and left, immediately heading for the docks.
Finding some sailors currently on break, he questioned them about the situation in Midland. He learned Griffith had saved the Princess and was currently leading a civil war against the King.
He searched around and found a ship headed for the city of Lana in the Paneria Alliance. It was the closest port city to Midland, so that was his destination. He would have to get past some mountains, but that was easy enough.
He knew Griffith and the Band of the Hawk could almost certainly win, but there was no way Guts was gonna just leave him and the Hawks to fight a war without him. He just wished he'd heard of the civil war sooner…
Still, better late than never.
The ship set sail the very next day. The ride was incredibly slow, from his perspective, but it was significantly faster than having to circle around and get back to Midland on foot.
Guts stayed on the deck of the ship for the entire trip. He didn't sleep and he didn't meditate. He stayed awake the entire time, staring out at the sea or helping the crew with the ship whenever necessary.
Eventually, they arrived at Lana. Guts immediately set off back to Midland. Some Inquisitor from the Holy See tried to arrest him on the road, calling him a witch or a demon because of his immense size. Guts killed him and his entourage and kept going. He wasn't about to let some unreasonable overzealous prick stop him.
As soon as he arrived in Midland, he started asking around about the war. What he learned made him furious.
He tracked down the remnants of the Band of the Hawk.
Casca was sitting in her tent reading a report. Thinking about everything and how it all went wrong.
They had been betrayed and Griffith had been captured.
After he had recovered, Judeau had personally snuck into Doldrey and snuck back out with Princess Charlotte. They couldn't leave her highness with the Red Bear Knights after their betrayal. Griffith had risked everything to save her to begin with. They couldn't dishonor him by letting her be forced to marry some prince from Tudor now that Griffith had been captured.
Now, however, they had massive targets on their backs from both Midland and the nobles who had originally sided with the Princess. Both sides said they had kidnapped her and wanted to "rescue" her from them. So they were hounded relentlessly. Their numbers had already been devastated by the betrayal. And they were always losing more and more with every engagement. They were down to a few hundred men. They couldn't hold out like this forever…
"If you push yourself too hard, you won't last." A voice said.
Casca looked and saw Judeau standing at the entrance of her tent with a bowl of soup.
"I know how you feel, but you're essentially the Hawk's leader now." He stepped in and set the soup on the edge of her table. "Everyone's worn out from being on the run for so long. Morale is at an all time low. If you were to collapse now…"
"Word just came back from the group we slipped into Wyndham." Casca told him in a grim tone. "Griffith is in the very lowest level of Wyndham Castle… Seems he's confined in a really old underground prison. He's been tortured for nine months, almost a year, and still it goes on… Several people have heard something between… screams… and moans in a voice like Griffith's coming from the prison. But in the past month… even that's come to an end…"
Casca clenched her fists in her lap. "Everyone's at the peak of exhaustion. We can't take more of this fugitive life. If we don't hurry…"
Judeau put a hand on her shoulder. "Have faith."
She looked up at him.
"Have more faith in your companions. Sure, we're the ones who lifted you up as our leader… but is there any need to burden yourself with everything? Each one of us does nothing more than what we can."
"Judeau…" Casca muttered.
"You'd better rest up! With a tired mind, you can't even plan how to rescue Griffith! So, anyway, eat then sleep! Your eyes are baggy." Judeau told her.
Casca sighed and looked down. "You're right."
As he turned and started leaving the tent she called out, "Judeau."
He paused and looked over his shoulder at her.
"Thanks." She said simply.
Without a word he exited her tent.
She reached for the soup he had left her. She took a single spoonful and immediately collapsed, unconscious. Unable to stay awake any longer.
She was awoken only a few seconds later with a shout of, "ENEMY RAID!"
She grabbed her sword and rushed out. Seeing what was happening she immediately barked out orders. "The enemy's on the north side of the forest! Units 3 and 4, meet their charge! Everyone else get the Princess and the wounded into wagons and on horseback! Then open ground to the south! Keep the Princess safe! Under no circumstances can she be allowed to be captured!"
"Immediate adaptation and command ability… Nothing less from the much-rumored boss of the Hawks. I'm impressed." Said a man's voice.
Casca looked and saw a kushan man wielding two Katars with extra blades on either side to catch swords.
"But in any kind of battle the moment the leader's head is taken is the moment the outcome is decided. Prepare yourself!" The man raised his weapons.
Casca readied her sword.
"Wielding a sword means you're a warrior, and I won't hold back because you're…" The man stopped talking as sounds of pure terror and carnage started coming from the enemy lines.
Both the Kushan and Casca looked and saw a massive figure cleaving his way through the forces attacking the Band of the Hawk. Guts cleaved men in half with ease, decimating the enemy lines. His aura blazed, rendering men too overwhelmed to even move as he cut them down with terrifying speed for something so large.
The Kushan's shoulders slumped in defeat. "Baron Guts… We're routed! Retreat!" The warrior called out, fleeing.
Guts continued to cleave through some enemy soldiers as they fled for their lives. He didn't bother to chase them down, however.
When he was finished killing, he looked at Casca. "Yo." He greeted her.
"GUUUTS!" Some of the surviving members of the Band of the Hawk shouted, rushing towards him.
The men practically swarmed him, laughing and cheering. A couple even embraced his legs.
Guts leaned down and picked up Rickert, holding him in his hands. "Gu… Gu…" Rickert sobbed in joy.
"Hey, Rickert. Glad to see you're still alive."
He set the kid back down. Looking over he saw Judeau and Pippin. Judeau gave him a thumbs up.
Guts returned the gesture.
He looked around and spotted Corkus, who was off standing by a tree, shunning him. Guts couldn't help but smile.
"CAPTAIN!" Some of the soldiers that used to be under his command shouted. "Captain Guts!"
"Ah, the Raiders…" Guts muttered.
The men pushed their way through the crowd and did their best to embrace him.
"You guys…" Guts chuckled.
"We don't have time to stand around! The enemy will come back! We move while it's still dark! Unit one secure the camp's perimeter! Units two and three carry out the arms and provisions that weren't burned! Everyone else gather up the horses that ran off! Hurry!" Casca ordered.
"Casca…" Rickert said, clearly about to object.
Guts knelt down and patted him on the head. "We'll talk later… She's right we need to hurry. If anything happens in the meantime, I'll keep whoever attacks us distracted and kill them all while you guys escape. I've gotten a bit better since the last time we saw each other."
A few hours later, after the Hawks had finished moving to their new location, the Hawks told Guts what happened.
"Griffith… Griffith was…" He muttered, shocked.
"It happened nine months ago. Just a couple months after you left… After we rescued Princess Charlotte, we were given shelter in Doldrey by the Red Bear Knights. Everything seemed fine at first. Some of our men died while we ran from Wyndham, so General Radford sent two companies of his own men to bolster our numbers while we went out on campaign… They betrayed us… They poisoned our food. One of the captains personally gave Griffith poisoned Brandy under the pretense of 'apologizing' for his men 'stealing food'. Fuckers… Then they attacked us. Burned down a lot of our camp. Knights loyal to the King showed up not long after…" Judeau explained.
He then looked at the ground, deep shame clear on his face. "It's my fault Griffith got captured… It's all my fault… While leading what men I'd managed to gather up, I wasn't thinking about where we were. I was only thinking about linking up with the other groups so we could establish a proper defense… I took a wrong turn and led us straight to the supply tents, which were on fire. Griffith tried to warn me. I managed to tell my men to get away, but I was too slow while I was carrying Griffith… We got caught in the explosion… Some loyalist knights showed up and grabbed Griffith. I bashed my head and was too out of it to do anything, and there were too many of them besides…"
He rested his face in his hands. "If I hadn't…. If I'd just paid attention to where we were… Damn it… God damn it…"
"It's not your fault, Judeau…" Rickert attempted to console him.
"Yes it is…" Judeau declared.
"No. It's the Red Bear Knights fault for betraying the Band of the Hawk… I should go to Doldrey and rip Radford's spine out…" Guts growled. "But I can't. Not with the Band of the Hawk in danger… My question is, why? Why did they betray you?"
"Because of me…" A feminine voice stated.
Guts looked over his shoulder and saw the Princess. She was wearing some very simple armor, definitely not fit for royalty. Likely just spare stuff the Hawks had lying around. On her hip was a decent hand and a half sword. Again, likely a spare.
"You?" Guts asked.
The princess nodded sadly. "At least, I suspect so… Um… I've thought about it ever since Judeau told me the truth of what happened. It's the only thing that makes any sense… Lord Radford is a very strict purist. He doesn't believe nobility and commoners should intermingle at all, let alone royalty and commoners. He may have been alright with Griffith's great great grandchildren marrying into the royal family because they would have been born into nobility. But Griffith was born a commoner… I was a fool. I thought it would be fine staying at Doldrey despite Radford's leanings as I never expected Griffith to propose to me. And when he did, I thought we could keep our engagement a secret… I was so stupid…"
"I wish I'd known all that while we were staying in Doldrey. I'd have poisoned him or strangled him in his sleep then hung his body to make it look like he offed himself, and all of this mess could have been avoided…" Judeau muttered.
Guts was silent for a moment, looking down at his hands. He remembered the dirty work he'd done for Griffith. He remembered that boy dying on his blade because he had reacted without thinking. He closed his hands into fists.
He was furious. He was starting to hate the nobles and royals. Truly hate them. All their scheming and politicking. He wanted to go to Doldrey and slaughter everyone in the fortress before going to Wyndham and killing every last noble he could get his hands on. Then he would personally rip the King limb from limb in the middle of the city for everyone to see before tearing his head off and sticking it on a pike outside the castle. Then he would see Griffith and Charlotte married and make Griffith king of Midland. He wanted to do that so, so badly…
But he couldn't. He had a duty to help the remnants of the Band of the Hawk. To protect and lead them in Griffith's absence.
After a moment he finally spoke. "If I'd known what the king was gonna do, and that there'd be a civil war, I never would have left. I only did because I thought things were finally calming down. That all the fighting was over… If I'd stayed and I knew that about Radford, I'd have assassinated him and none of you would have ever known about it… Hell, I'd have killed the king before any of this got to this point… And I would have been able to track down the people who took Griffith and I'd have saved him. I'm just as much to blame for all of this as anyone. So you two should stop being so hard on yourselves."
Judeau sighed. "Kinda hard when I watched Griffith get taken right in front of me and I couldn't do anything to stop it… I had him… And then I lost him… Anyway… In one year, we've dropped to less than a fifth in number. Maybe a sixth. All of them died. Some died during our escape from Wyndham. Some died during the two battles we fought in our brief campagne. Most died in the attack when the Red Bear Knights betrayed us. Then we've been being whittled away more and more with each attack we suffer through… We can't even be called an army anymore. But it still could have been worse. If Casca hadn't become our leader or worse, died in the attack when we were betrayed… By now the Band of the Hawk without Griffith would have scattered to the winds… The Band itself wouldn't exist."
"Not just that…" Rickert spoke up. "I think we would have been wiped out that day if Casca hadn't taken command. "She was amazing. Sick from poison and with the bare minimum of equipment, surrounded by close to five times our number with a third of our men dead or too sick to move because of the poison, she managed to gather everyone together. She rallied everyone, on the verge of panic, with arrows coming down like rain and half of our camp on fire and led the vanguard in breaking through the knights."
Guts could already picture it in his mind. The camp burning, men dead or unconscious all around, the camp on fire. A force of enemies outnumbering the Band of the Hawk five to one…
Judeau continued where Rickert left off. "She continued to command us all to the end, not losing consciousness even with five arrow wounds and half poisoned. So since then, Casca's been acting as our leader. Not one person opposed it after that terrific deed. To be honest, I think it's a little unfair to her. But we've got no room for any other option. If we're to… If the Hawks are to survive."
Guts looked over at Casca who was reading a paper some other members had handed her.
Judeau sighed. "Well… It's not all grim news. We haven't only been running around. Today a report came from some spies who slipped into Wyndham. They've found Griffith's location. We're soon to go forward with a plan we've been working on for the past few months. We'll rescue Griffith."
Guts smiled. This was the Band of the Hawk he knew. He glanced at the Princess. She looked distraught but hopeful.
"Everyone here's still worn out. We've been chased around so badly everyone here's covered mind and body in wounds. But there's no one here who would try to leave. No one's been coerced into staying either. In the end, everyone here is for better or worse, a hawk to the core. Courage and will power alone aren't about to cut it. Especially not now… We don't go just to save Griffith. We can't get started again without him…" Judeau stated. He gave Guts a look and opened his mouth as if to say something more but stopped himself and shook his head.
Guts was curious about what he had been about to say, but decided not to push him on it. Instead he said, "It's a good thing."
"Huh?" Judeau asked.
"You know. When the place you come back to hasn't changed. It's a good thing."
Everyone stared at him in surprise.
"On that note, what have you been doing this past year?" Judeau asked.
"Y-yeah, right! Haven't rumors of the civil war spread to other countries? How come you didn't come sooner…?" Rickert asked.
Pippin bonked him on the head.
"I'm sorry, Rickert. I really didn't know." Guts told him.
Rubbing his head, Rickert asked, "But how? Were you on a deserted island or something?"
"I went to Kushan. I was wandering from place to place in the middle of the desert. I was looking for another witch doctor or sorcerer to help me with the poison. Eventually, I found one. He taught me a more intense meditation than the witch doctor here in midland taught me, but it's both absolute hell to go through and it's incredibly dangerous. I have to put myself in a state on the very edge of death and spend hours like that. In that state I experience the same vision where I have to fight… things… I don't know how to describe them. The Kushan called them Rākshasas or Asuras. Demons, essentially… And it hurts. More than anything a person can imagine without going through it themselves, and I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. But, I'm making progress. It's incredibly slow but I'm overcoming the poison a little bit more every time I do it. That's why I had a sudden explosive growth spurt and got even taller, I think. Eventually, I'll be rid of it entirely."
He paused for a moment then drew his sword. "The rest of the time, I was out in the middle of the desert wandering around swinging this. Only went into towns or cities to buy food whenever I was running low. That's how I heard what was going on. I went into town to buy food and I was told a rumor about a civil war in Midland. I had to take a ship and sail to Lana in the Paneria Alliance. From there, I had to walk back to Midland on foot. So the trip back took me a while…"
"Geeze… How long until you're completely cured?" Rickert asked.
Guts shrugged. "Don't know. Like I said, it's slow. Could be months, or it could be years. It also depends how often and for how long I spend in that state. I haven't slept or meditated ever since I learned what happened. I spent the whole time awake and traveling, just to get back here as soon as possible. Fortunately, I don't need as much sleep as a normal person."
"So… Did you find it? You know…" Judeau asked.
Guts smiled. "Honestly, I still don't know for sure… But… I found out one thing. No… I felt it." He held up his massive sword. "Seems like, for me… Nothing but wielding this really feels true. There're no other answers. It feels natural. As for anything else, I'll just have to wait and see."
"If you can say that with a straight face, then well done." Judeau stated. "Anyway, you're coming back is proof we still have some luck left." He stood up and held out a hand towards Guts. "I hope you'll help us, Captain of the Raiders."
"Y'mean former Raiders Captain." Said Corkus, with his back turned towards them.
"Corkuuus…" Rickert groaned.
"I won't recognize it. He left on his own for some stupid dream so he could feel all special… Pah! He wasn't here when things were at their worst for us. Think I can call someone like that a Comrade?" Corkus grumbled. He then took a drink from his water skin. "Well, even if I close my eyes to the past, right now as strangers go, you're the real deal. At least get that straight."
"C'mon Corkus…" Rickert pleaded.
"…Yeah." Guts stated. Everyone looked at him. "I get it." He told them.
"Keh!" Corkus scoffed.
"Captain!" Some of the other Hawks shouted rushing over to him. "How long're you gonna talk about this stuff? Come on over and let's have a drink!"
"Guys…" Guts muttered. He then looked at one of the Hawks. "Oh yeah, Gaston. What about your clothing shop in Wyndham?"
"Yeah, about that. I ran out on it. Y'know when I heard what happened with the Princess and that the Band was going to war again, I couldn't just stay there… Heh, all it did was frustrate me. Same for you, right Captain?"
Guts was about to go with his men when Judeau grabbed his wrist. "Wait a minute. Before that…"
"What?" Guts asked.
"I don't wanna shout it up at you so kneel down here, at least." Judeau told him.
Guts complied, kneeling down and leaning in so Judeau could whisper in his ear.
"About Casca. Thanks to the wounds and the poison a few months ago, she spent three days and three nights in a comatose state near death. During that time she had nightmares and called out over and over to Griffith… and to you."
Guts flinched, hearing that. He looked over at Casca. She looked back at him before stubbornly turning away. She was upset with him. He could tell.
"She's pushing herself harder than it looks. She's always been one with too much on her shoulders. But there's nothing we can do. You can."
Guts considered Judeau's words and thought about Casca. He glanced at Princess Charlotte, and thought of Griffith.
The next morning, he was sitting under a tree by himself, overlooking the camp.
Casca approached him. "Come with me for a bit." She told him.
Without saying a word, he got up and followed her to a cliff overlooking a beautiful waterfall.
"Defend yourself." She ordered.
"Eh? Hey, hold on. What's this about?" He asked. "We haven't spoken in a year and you wanna fight? Well, this is like you… But you gotta be kidding."
Casca drew her sword and tried to slash at Guts' stomach, unable to reach his throat or anything more vital.
Guts twisted his body and deflected the strike with his sword, which was currently in its scabbard on his back.
He looked down and saw the fierce look in her eyes.
"Time out! Hold on… You really want to kill me!"
Casca lunged, trying to stab him.
He deflected the strike again. He probably didn't need to. The most vital part she could reach was his femoral arteries. But he was trying not to escalate this any further.
She kept stabbing and slashing at him. Guts stopped blocking and just dodged, avoiding her blade entirely.
"Don't mess around! Draw your sword!" She demanded.
Guts maneuvered and managed to trip her. "What the hell's with you? Reckless as ever, I see… Tell me why! It's a little much for you to try to kill me when we haven't seen eachother in a year!" He demanded.
"Why did you come back now…? It's all your fault. You destroyed all of it! It's your fault!" She raised her sword and swung at his leg trying to cut the inside of his thigh in an attempt to make him bleed out.
Guts dodged the strike. "Mine?"
"Yes. Griffith, the hawks. Everything! You messed it all up! Because you left, everything fell apart!"
Guts frowned.
"If you'd been with us, Griffith would never have been captured! If you were here, the Hawks wouldn't have been devastated when the Red Bears betrayed us! If it weren't for you being so damn selfish, we wouldn't be in this mess! It's all your fault!"
Guts let her stab him in the stomach. He gripped her blade and held it in place.
She was exhausted. At her wits end. The stress had been building and building and was getting to her. She had been looking for someone, anyone, to blame for the misfortune the Hawks had suffered as an outlet for the stress. And she'd settled on blaming Guts.
Guts realized this. The problem was, he didn't disagree with her assessment. He blamed himself too.
Her eyes widened at the sight of her blade sticking into his stomach.
"That's crazy… You should have been able to dodge… Why…?" She asked. She tried to pull the weapon out. "That's enough… Let go…"
"Then… What else should I have done?" Guts asked. He shoved the blade a little deeper into his own flesh, heedless of the pain. Being stabbed was little more than an itch compared to the agony he faced whenever he tried fighting the poison.
"…Idiot. Let go!" She demanded.
"I only did what Griffith would have done." He pressed himself forward a little bit, impaling himself further on the blade.
"S-stop that! You'll…!" She shouted, visibly shaken.
"I just did my own thing. What else should I have done?" Guts asked, rotating the blade. If it was his fault that Griffith had been captured and the Hawks suffered such devastating losses, he was willing to accept whatever punishment he deserved. Including this.
"Let go…" Casca pleaded. "ALRIGHT, I GET IT! LET GO, YOU FOOL!"
Guts pulled the blade back out of himself. The blood ran freely from the wound for a few seconds before it started slowing to a trickle and stopped completely. His injuries always sealed themselves incredibly fast.
Casca dropped the sword and fell to her knees. "Hmhm…" Casca chuckled. "Hmhm… Ahahaha…" There was no humor in that laugh. It was the defeated laugh of one who had given in to despair. "I know what you're saying is right… I really do… But… I just can't take it anymore. I told you before that I wanted to be beside Griffith… That I want to be his sword, like you were…"
"Yeah, I remember."
"That wasn't true. That… The me who wished to become that way… was bluffing. I'm sure I genuinely meant it at first… But one day I realized… Griffith's not a god… And I am a woman. How easy would it be… if I could just make my heart feel the way I want it to?"
Casca shook her head. "I'm not stupid. I realized if Griffith set his sights on the throne of Midland… Marrying Princess Charlotte would be the fastest shortcut… And knowing Griffith… I figured he'd be sure to take it someday… It's why I had Judeau sneak her out of Doldrey, even though I knew it would make everything worse for us… Even though I was so…"
She couldn't finish that sentence. She looked out towards the waterfall. "Maybe even what's happening now… I thought I could bear even this. I wanted to believe. If I couldn't be near him as a woman… As his sword… It would be alright so long as I could become something indispensable to the realization of his dream… I wanted to believe… But… I finally understood clearly that day a year ago, when you left… That there was no longer room next to Griffith the way there used to be. My dream… had… already ended."
Casca stood up and started backing away towards the cliff. "I can't do it anymore. Desperately trying to protect the Band of the Hawk…It's like I was going to disappear if I didn't at least cling to some pointless hope… I couldn't be a woman, or something invaluable. To keep on protecting the almost broken dream of someone who might not even be alive… I just… can't… I'm so tired… You do the rest."
She went limp and let herself start falling over the edge.
Guts rushed forwards and grabbed her wrist before she could fall.
She stared up at him in surprise.
He quickly pulled her back up and tossed her behind him, back away from the cliff.
"What the hell're you thinkin'... LOOK HERE! DON'T YOU EVER GO NEAR A CLIFF AGAIN! I can't deal with being dragged off twice, let alone more!" This had almost ended up like the time he killed three hundred men. Falling off a cliff to save Casca.
"You fool… You're always trying to save me…" She clung to his pants and pressed her head against his leg. "Getting hurt and bleeding…" She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "You're such… a fool."
She pressed her head against his leg again.
Guts sat down so she could at least reach his chest.
She practically collapsed against him. "Fool…"
He cupped her face and kissed her forehead.
Casca tilted her face up.
Guts realized what was happening and was surprised for a moment. Then he leaned in, accepting her kiss.
He wasn't sure about romance. He'd never really felt attracted to anyone. At least, not in that way. He could recognize and appreciate beauty, but more so in the sense of someone appreciating the beauty of a rainbow over a scenic landscape, a masterfully carved statue, or a beautiful painting.
But for Casca, he was willing to try. If there was anyone in existence he would be willing to have a relationship with, it was her. By far.
It was then he finally realized his true dream. Beyond wielding his sword, and achieving absolute mastery over it, he wanted to be a man. He didn't want to be a weapon to conquer and destroy. He wanted, more than anything, to be human. To be able to understand romance. To start a family. That was his dream.
Unbeknownst to him, his desires resonated in his very soul. As he embraced Casca, in the Warp the deity that was his soul, worked. Using the power Guts had freed up fighting against the Slaaneshi curse, a small piece of the deity was split from the rest of its whole.
Under normal circumstances, the fragment could be considered the equivalent of a Greater Daemon. The deity was not nearly as powerful as the Chaos Gods or the Four Kings so it could not make endless hordes of Greater Daemons, but making one was well within its bounds. That was under normal circumstances. In this case, the fragment of Guts' soul was used to form another soul which was placed within Casca's womb.
The Emperor had been thorough in ensuring the Primarchs could not reproduce, which was why he had not made a single female amongst them. However, this world was halfway or more into the intersection between the warp and the physical world, the interstice, so thoroughly inundated was it in the power of the warp. Thus things that would normally be impossible became possible. It was still unlikely to work if left as is, but there was still a very slim chance the child could be born. That Guts' dream could be fulfilled. However unlikely it may have been. Only time would tell.
If it failed, the fragment would merely be reabsorbed and nothing would be lost. If it worked, it would be a success and a child would be gained.
The power lost would be regained eventually. Just as the Chaos Gods were fed by the collective unconscious of all life, so too were the souls of the twenty primarchs. A lesser god was still a god, after all.
This is by far the chapter I'm the most worried about. Specifically, the conception of the Demon Child/Moonlight Boy. I want it to be a thing in this story, but Primarchs are infertile. Fulgrim had 12 wives or something like that, I don't know the exact number, and not one natural born child. It's just as impossible for the Primarchs as it is for a Space Marine.
So the only explanation I could really think of that could even remotely make it work was intense warp fuckery. So a Greater Daemon soul split off from the Primarch's God Soul and effectively trying to biomancy itself into existence, or leverage the world's connection to the warp to make itself viable, or something like that, which is only even a remote possibility because the world is so heavily entwined in the Interstice and thus half way into being a daemon world already. Thus why the Elf Island can exist in the first place.
I hope this part isn't too immersion breaking or anything like that. If it is, I'm open to ideas on how it could be rewritten to fix it. I'll take it out entirely and just say it doesn't work like that if I have to. I'd just prefer if it could be a thing.
Well, it'll certainly shock the hell out of the Emperor when he eventually shows up.