Chapter 15
The king continued to mostly ignore Narinya. When he did acknowledge her, it was usually to deliver a pointed remark that resulted in silence settling over the dinner table. Narinya had thought that even if his comments did not get less frequent, she would eventually be able to pay them no mind. But it was getting worse and not better and it was beginning to demoralize her more and more.
His words ate away at her, and she realized the situation was also uncomfortable for the other members of her new family, whose mealtimes were considerably less relaxed now. Poor Lindethiel usually took it upon herself to keep conversation flowing and light. While Narinya was grateful for it, she also knew it wasn't a fair burden for Lindethiel to continue to bear. Feredir, not yet secure enough in his position in the family to take any obvious sides, would often be sat in silence.
And then there was Legolas.
Her thoughts strayed often to the memory of the recent day at the hidden spring with him. When she thought of his abrupt retreat from her and the words he said after, her chest tightened with hurt. They had not spoken of it since.
She was starting to believe that it would in fact have been better for everyone if Thranduil had declared an annulment.
One evening that felt much the same as any other, Narinya and Legolas took their places at the king's table for the evening meal. Lindethiel, eager to relieve the tension at the table as always, spoke first. "Father, Feredir and I would like to formally set a date for our wedding, if we have your approval. We have chosen a few that might be suitable."
"Certainly, my daughter," Thranduil appeared relaxed and jovial on this night.
Lindethiel continued on, "We were thinking next year's summer or autumn would be suitable; we will want to leave plenty of time for invitations and travel to the Woodland Realm, of course." She was interrupted by two handmaidens setting glasses of wine and plates of food before each of them.
Thranduil waited for the handmaidens to take their leave before lifting his glass, "A toast."
Narinya stiffened but then relaxed when he addressed Lindethiel and Legolas.
"Daugher, son," Thranduil paused to nod to each of them in turn, "You make me far more proud than you know. The sacrifices and efforts you both make for the good of our people and our realm do not go unnoticed." He smiled warmly at his two children with sincere pride.
He then continued on, "Feredir, you are a most welcome addition to our family. You are both honorable and kind of heart and I know that you will treat my daughter well. Narinya…"
Narinya braced for whatever was to come, doubtful he would have similarly flattering words for her.
"You are both intelligent and humble, for you are cunning enough to deceive a king, and when you could have carried the child of a prince, you instead chose the seed of a pauper."
Shocked silence fell over the table.
After a moment, Narinya stood up and walked calmly but swiftly out of the room.
If she had stayed, she would have seen Legolas rise from his chair, leaning over the table at his father, "Enough! There will be no more of this." He was not about to let the king get away with what he had said to his wife.
"You will not continue to say such words to the Princess of Greenwood, to the elleth I am married to, who, I might remind, you chose for me! You know not what she has put herself through already."
Feredir looked down, not wanting to get involved in the dispute, but feeling as though Thranduil had stepped over some nameless boundary tonight. Lindethiel watched the heated exchange between her brother and father for a moment, before rising and following after Narinya.
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Lindethiel found Narinya in her chambers, silent tears escaping her eyes.
"I am sorry, Narinya, when my father reflects on this, he will realize how hurtful and improper his words were." Lindethiel put a supportive hand on her shoulder.
Narinya turned to her friend, "I am certain he already knows; his intent is to hurt me. I am well aware that I am fortunate to be able to remain in this family, but he punishes me for it every day that I remain."
She wiped her eyes, "Please know how grateful I am for everything you do, Lindethiel. If I may ask for some privacy, I would really like to be alone."
Lindethiel nodded and left the room.
As soon as she was gone, Narinya packed her things into her riding bag. When she had finished her task, she sat down at the small desk in the chamber and produced a piece of blank parchment from the drawer.
When her letter was complete, she sealed it and left the room.
Narinya managed to slip through the halls mostly unnoticed, traveling into the deep parts of the caves where meals were prepared. She knew there to be an alternate exit there, though she had never used it.
She continued on through the kitchen. It was nearly empty as the mealtime had long past ended now. She found the heavy door on the far wall, where food stores were hauled in and out. Two guards stood at either side of the doorway and they bowed their heads to her as she walked through, but did not move to stop her. She was glad they did not ask where she was heading.
The cool air helped her clear her mind as she walked toward the stables. She still fought back her tears, but she was beginning to feel more anger and less sadness. She had certainly paid dearly for her transgressions already and she simply could not continue to live under Thranduil's wrathful gaze.
She thought of her husband next. They had come to an understanding, yes, but the distance between them since the night she had made her confession persisted, and he did not seem all that interested in bridging it. This would likely be a relief to him in the end. If he did not want her, then he should have the chance to find another who could be a true wife to him.
The stable hands were cleaning up for the evening and were surprised to see the princess enter, especially carrying a somewhat large pack.
"My lady, can we assist you?" One stopped his sweeping, leaning the broom against a closed stall door, and walked toward the princess.
"Nay, I am fine, thank you. I'll be taking Alagos out for an evening ride." She spoke calmly, pushing all emotion from her voice.
"Out in the forest? Does the prince know of this?" The hour was late for casual horseback rides.
"Yes, he knows," she lied, "Thank you for your concern." The stable hands exchanged looks but said nothing further, not in a position to question or delay the princess.
She led Alagos from his stall, fitting the riding pack onto his broad back with the cord that wrapped around his body. She climbed onto his back and took a deep breath. She was turning her back on her new home and station, something she did not truly want to do, both because of the obligation she now felt to Greenwood and the happiness and purpose she had found there. But she knew this would lead to a better outcome for everyone, in time. She would go back to the lake, find a way to make a home for herself there, and the Woodland Realm would move on without her.
Abandoning her indecision, she rode through the dark forest at a canter, following the path along the river that her and Legolas had walked together that past fall.
Little did she know, she was doing exactly what Thranduil had wanted. He knew that his increasingly harsh words would eventually wear on her, and he hoped that she would leave on her own accord. It would still be a blemish on his house, of course, but far less of a disgrace than would have been the case had anyone found out the truth of the matter. She had held out for longer than he had expected.
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Legolas had continued his scathing exchange with his father for many more minutes after Narinya had left the hall. He defended her, his words sparring with his father's, pointing out all the good she had done since taking on her title and the qualities he saw in her that made her a better princess than he could ever have hoped for. She had made quite a mistake, that was certainly true, but that did not change all that she had done well.
When neither father nor son could take any more, Legolas turned on his heel and headed toward his chambers, knowing that his next task was to reassure his wife. He hoped that she had not let herself be any more bothered by this latest attack on her honor than she had been by Thranduil's prior hurtful words.
Instead of finding Narinya in their chambers as he had expected, he found a parchment envelope addressed to him. He picked it up from the desk and opened it, his heart sinking as he did.
Legolas,
Words cannot express my thanks for everything you have done since my arrival in Greenwood. I hardly deserve all the forgiveness and kindness you offer. You are truly a fine prince and a finer ellon. I have been lucky to know you.
But, it is impossible carrying on as princess when the king that I serve despises me so openly. I am truly sorry for breaking my commitments, to Greenwood, and to you. But I do hope that once I am gone, you may have a more deserving princess, one of your own choosing, and she will be a better fit for you, your family, and the realm.
I am deeply sorry for the trouble and embarrassment I have caused and continue to cause.
Your friend,
-Narinya
Legolas read the note back several times, noting the small smudges where he guessed tears might have fallen upon the page. He was stunned and dismayed by the content of the note, but even more surprised at the depth of his emotion when reading it.
"Where did she go?" Both Lindethiel and Thranduil now stood in the threshold behind him.
Legolas spun around quickly, "She did not say, but I intend to find her."
Thranduil approached, scanning the content of the note over his son's shoulder.
"She probably went to that half-elf's home, in Lake-town," Thranduil said, his voice layered with a smug vindication.
"Father, leave us." Legolas was not about to fall back into exchanging words with his father. There was nothing left to be said.
Lindethiel looked first at her father and then at her brother. Thranduil turned around and walked out without another word, closing the door behind him.
"He may be right," Lindethiel said gently.
"I think more highly of her than you do, it would seem."
It was not like Legolas to say words in such a biting tone to his sister; she could tell that the suggestion had hurt him, "I only mean to say that it makes sense she would go back to Lake-town," she paused, "And she never did clarify the extent of their relationship."
Legolas looked increasingly troubled, "I am well aware."
"You care for her far more than you would like to admit."
Instead of responding, he extended the parchment toward his sister, adding, "She signed it 'friend'."
Lindethiel took the note and read it herself, "Perhaps she did not want to sign as your wife because she believes that is over now?"
"But it is not over."
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It took a great deal of convincing to persuade Legolas not to pursue her that very moment. If she took the main river path out of Greenwood toward Long Lake, her journey would be relatively safe, as long as she kept to the trail. There were guards posted on platforms high in the trees at intervals for most of the distance to Lake-town, out of sight but always watching those that passed into and out of the Woodland Realm by that road. Despite this, he felt anxious as he waited for dawn to break.
He took no sleep that night, instead reflecting on all that had happened and his own feelings.
He realized now that he'd made a mistake in lying to her at the glade. He had very much wanted to do all of those things and more with her; the enchanted pool had only removed his inhibitions and tempered his more complicated feelings. Under the influence of those waters, he was free of his hurt and uncertainty around all that had happened between he and Narinya and, surprisingly, it had brought him clarity.
And yet, he had not wanted to admit the truth to her, because of his own lingering questions. In his mind often was the reality that there was another who seemingly had her affection right up until the day she reluctantly came to Greenwood, and the possibility that he might still have her affection now.
But, she had promised to be open and honest with him, and he had not been open and honest with her. It was plain to him now that he might have hurt and confused her.
And then there was the matter of his father's words, which were unceasing in their cruelty of late. He could not blame Narinya for finally reaching the limit of what she could tolerate.
Surprisingly, Thranduil came to apologize to his son much later in the night, after the halls were quiet and still.
"I thought I might find you awake." He said, his voice much kinder than it had been earlier that evening.
Legolas did not acknowledge him.
"I regret the hurtful words I spoke to her, my son, as I can see they have hurt you as well. As you plan to seek her out, I will accompany you and apologize myself."
Though Thranduil was sincerely remorseful for causing his son distress, a part of him indeed hoped they would find Narinya with Calanon, dashing any chance of continuing this farce of a marriage. Explaining to the realm that the princess had left on her own accord, that her and the prince simply were not a good match, would not exactly be pleasant, but would be far less embarrassing than exiling her for entering the marriage carrying another's child would have been.
Legolas nodded once, but still said nothing.
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When the sun's first rays hit the highest branches of Greenwood's canopy, the prince was ready to depart.
Lindethiel saw Legolas and Thranduil off, wondering what they would find and being silently thankful that her own marriage would certainly be more stable than her brother's.
They rode in silence along the pathway by the river, still quite dark at the early hour, the sun not yet able to break through the branches overhead. Legolas used the time to try to prepare himself for whatever would come if and when they did find Narinya.
Thranduil finally broke the heavy silence that had settled between them, "Why do you want to pursue her, my son? After what she did to you, and to us? It is simple enough to let her go now. We can have this all undone."
"It is not as simple as you say. I care for her, more than I ever expected to."
Thranduil looked pointedly at his son, "Did you think that your bride was chosen at random or simply out of convenience? I had much counsel in choosing her."
Legolas remained looking ahead and said nothing, so Thranduil continued on, "She was selected for the many qualities that you have already recognized. But she was also selected with you in mind. I was not about to pair you with someone that I knew you would not get along well with, or that you could never hope to form a bond with. I do want what is best for the realm, after all, and for you, my son."
After a pause, the king continued, "But she turned out to be far more unpredictable than I had thought."
Legolas was glad to hear his father's words, both the acknowledgement of Narinya's strengths and the care that had been taken in choosing her for him, but it did not change the current predicament they were in. "She made a mistake. I have forgiven her for it, and I hope that you will too."
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