Jessica's Point of View

Xaldin found something that would supposedly heal any injuries that we didn't know about from when I fainted. It wasn't as bad as some of the concoctions my father had practically force-fed me due to getting hurt or sick over the years, but it still tasted terrible. Over the next two days, Xemnas made me stay in my room. After being deemed alright to be up and about, I was confined to the castle. Xemnas continued to keep a close eye on me. I was pretty sure he also ordered others to look out for me because I never seemed to be alone. After a week of staying in the castle, Xemnas finally let me go on missions again. By that time, I was desperate for a distraction. I had spent most of my time before that sulking about. Xemnas had made it clear that I was not allowed to go anywhere after my missions unless I was with another member of the Organization, so I chose to come straight home every day. It became a routine. Sometimes, I would talk to the Ventus look-alike. Xion claimed he had been awake before, but the longer he was in his coma, the more I wondered if Xemnas had found my sleeping friend and taken him here.

One day, I was proved wrong. Once I had been doing my missions for a week, Roxas woke up. I saw him step into The Grey Area while Saix gave me my mission. Everything else melted away when I saw him because nothing else mattered. Ventus was back from his sleep. I blinked, and he was in his old clothes instead of the Organization coat. As I walked toward him, I had a vague notion that I had dropped my mission information. I just walked toward him slowly. Xaldin stepped into my path, snapping me out of my trance. "What are you doing?" Xaldin demanded.

"I was..." I stepped around Xaldin to see Ventus again, but he was in his Organization coat. I realized that I had only imagined him as Ventus. I took a deep breath and prepared myself. "Excuse me, Xaldin. I have more pressing matters to attend to."

"What?" Xaldin asked, clearly stunned by my words.

I stepped around Xaldin and approached Roxas more meaningfully than last time. If he recognized me, he showed no indication of it. I didn't want to scare him away, so I introduced myself. "Hi, I'm Jessica. You can call me Jess."

My heart fluttered as he seemed to recognize me. "Oh yeah. I remember Axel telling me about you," Roxas said. I did my best not to look disappointed and kept smiling. "He said you were gone for a while, and he wasn't sure if you were coming back."

I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned around. Saix was right behind me, and he looked mad. My smile fell. Saix turned his attention away from me and toward Roxas. "You're awake."

"Did you ever find out what happened at Castle Oblivion?" Roxas questioned. I walked to a different section of the Grey Area, not wanting to hear what I already knew.

Xaldin shoved the mission detail papers at me. I took them with shaky hands. "What's wrong with you?" Xaldin inquired. His words weren't harsh, more curious than anything else. I didn't say anything. I glanced at the papers, seeing that my mission was with him, which explained his interest in me. "Do you have nothing to say, Jessica?" I couldn't bring myself to answer. Instead, I looked over my shoulder to see Roxas leaving through a dark corridor. Xaldin let out a sigh. "Oh. I see it now. He looks like that boy who was with you when I first saw you, doesn't he? Whatever happened to him anyway?"

I felt that same dizzy, sick feeling I had right before I fainted, but I was prepared that time. Xaldin had told me before that if I ever felt like I would faint again, I should sit down, so I went to a couch and sat. Xaldin followed after me. "I think I should stay here. I'm not feeling well," I decided.

"I think so, too. I'll inform Lord Xemnas. I'm sure he won't have a problem with it," Xaldin agreed. He walked out of the room.

"Aw. Our little sweetheart is learning her limits. We're all so proud," Xigbar commented. I rolled my eyes as he ruffled my hair. I knew he had likely been listening in.

"How long are you going to keep calling me that? It's demeaning," I groaned.

"I could go back to bunhead if you want," Xigbar suggested.

"Do what you want," I grumbled.

"Someone's in a bad mood. Come on, lighten up a little," Xigbar tried.

Saix approached us. "Don't you both have missions to go to?"

"Oh man, it's the fun police. Fine. I'll get going," Xigbar smirked. He left through a dark corridor.

"And you?" Saix inquired.

"I don't feel well. Xaldin went to tell Xemnas that I'm not going out today," I explained.

"I see," Saix replied. I looked away and waited for him to leave, but he didn't. He seemed to be contemplating what to say until he finally spoke. "Jessica, is something wrong? You seem not yourself today. I realize that you have been acting strange due to the circumstances, but this looks different."

"Nothing's the matter, Saix. Don't you have a job to do?" I reminded.

Saix set his clipboard down and smiled. "Actually, I'm finished. There are a lot less people to give missions to right now." He sat down next to me. "Why were you so intent on talking to Roxas?"

There it was. Saix didn't care about me. He only cared that I was taking up Roxas's time when he could have already left for his mission. "I don't owe you an explanation," I scoffed.

I got up to leave, but Saix reached for my arm and grabbed it. His expression had turned cold. "Roxas is different, Jessica. He is our first Nobody who is a keyblade wielder. I don't want you distracting him, do you understand?" Any warmth in his voice was gone.

I pulled my arm free from his grasp. "I do, but that doesn't mean I'll listen," I said. I walked out of the room and found Xemnas in his office. He seemed slightly surprised to see me. I plopped in the chair across from him, not waiting for an invitation. "Roxas is awake."

"Xaldin told me. He also told me you weren't feeling well. I was actually about to see how you were doing," Xemnas replied. I wanted to put up my walls and brush it off like it was nothing, but I couldn't. I began crying loudly. Xemnas rushed to my side. "It's alright. I'm here." He hugged me close, and I hugged him back.

"He even sounds like Ven, but you were right. He's not. I don't understand it," I sobbed.

"I know, darling. I know," Xemnas soothed.

"I had hoped that- that I could have someone again, but now it's gone," I gushed.

"Shh. It's okay. You can get through this. I did try, Jessica. I tried to tell you that Roxas isn't Ventus. You can trust me, dearest," Xemnas murmured.

I still didn't trust him, but I would fight him another day when I had more energy. At that moment, I felt broken. I craved affection from someone, even if it meant him. He let me cry in his arms as long as I wanted. After what felt like forever, I wiped the tears away. Xemnas released me from his embrace. "I'm sorry. I know you're busy. I should go," I apologized. Coming to Xemnas was a mistake. I meant to have a serious conversation with him, but it turned into seeking comfort. I wished that I could take it all back.

"Don't leave. Stay with me," Xemnas pleaded.

I reluctantly nodded. "If that's what you want," I agreed. Xemnas resumed looking over some papers. "Why do you do that?" Xemnas turned his attention to me with a questioning look. "Why do you pretend to care about me?"

"I'm not pretending. I care, Jessica," Xemnas denied. I held back from scoffing. If he cared, he would tell me why Roxas looked like Ventus. I still wasn't convinced that there was no connection between the two. I didn't want to fight with him, so I didn't bring it up again. "Would you be up for taking a walk somewhere? Some fresh air might do you some good."

I realized I was a lot calmer after letting my sadness out. I nodded. "I suppose so. I seem to be past the worst of it. I'm sorry for being such a burden."

"Nonsense. You're not a burden. You're family," Xemnas assured me.

"Family," I repeated, the word feeling foreign on my tongue.

Xemnas stood up. "Now, where would you like to go?"

I wanted to go somewhere I knew well, but it couldn't be Hollow Bastion. If I were to go there, I would have been in tears again the minute I stepped foot on that world. It dawned on me that I hadn't visited my grandfather since before Atlantica, but I didn't want to with Xemnas by my side. "Can I get ice cream in Twilight Town?" I requested.

"Of course you can," Xemnas smiled. He opened a dark corridor, and we went through.