Chapter 11: La Push
The next morning I was woken up by bright beams of sunlight shining through my room and blinding me. I yawned and stretched then threw the covers off me and walked to the window to look outside, and for the first time since arriving in Forks I clearly saw the sun standing at the horizon- behind the green trees.
There were a few white clouds that patched the sky but most of the horizon was sky blue. I had almost forgotten what that colour looked like.
I felt excited butterflies in my stomach. A sunny day never failed to make me happy and get me in a good mood.
I wore a casual, grey T-shirt today- which was also a first and paired it with black jeans. I pulled on my sneakers and ran downstairs. As I got downstairs I saw the Cullens weren't in the house, it was early morning and a Saturday which meant they were probably hunting.
I made myself some sandwiches and water bottles to drink in preparation then put it in my backpack, as I did I noticed Bella's diary. I picked it up and held it in my hands. I had promised Bella I was going to give it back to her today so I tore out my written pages and put it back, then threw it around my shoulders and walked out of the door.
As I got outside I was met with warm sunlight shining on my skin. I heard birds singing in the distance along with some other animals. The forest was usually a dead, grey wasteland but it seemed to come alive at a day like this.
I smiled and walked to Bella's house, enjoying the sun and looking up at the sky every now and then. As I arrived at Charlie's house I walked up to the door and suddenly I felt a bit nervous. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. To my surprise it was Charlie who opened it- staring at me and looking me up and down.
"Good morning Mr Swan" I said, feeling incredibly awkward.
"Is Bella ready?"
"Charlie" He reminded me.
"Sorry. Bad habit" I chuckled nervously.
He scratched the back of his head "I uh..didn't know you were invited to the beach today"
"I wasn't. Bella invited me yesterday" I told him honestly.
"Right"
I pressed my lips together in a small smile.
Awkward.
I heard footsteps running down the stairs and Bella appeared at the door but then stopped when she noticed me standing there talking to her dad. Her cheeks lightened up as she looked down at her hands, playing with her fingers nervously.
She was wearing a simple white t shirt tucked within her jeans and had a grey jacket wrapped around her waist. Now she wasn't wearing oversized sweaters I noticed how slim her body was.
"Good morning" I smiled at her.
"Good morning" she said quietly, still looking at her hands.
I bit my lip as I saw Charlie was still standing there, giving me an suspicious look.
"Are you ready to go?" I asked Bella.
She nodded and stepped outside.
"I'll make sure Bella is back home before midnight" I said, smiling at Charlie.
He nodded and smiled sheepishly "Well, I'm taking your word on that"
Bella gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, then they told each other goodbye and we got into her truck.
As we were fastening our seatbelts I took a deep breath of relief.
"Well that was awkward" I told her as I chuckled.
She smiled at me and turned on her engine "Yeah. I'm sorry about that"
I glanced up at her "You look nice today, by the way"
"Thanks" she blushed
We started driving in silence and rolled down the windows. I leaned my arm on the door, staring outside at the blue sky and green trees that were all around us. I had no idea where we were going or who we were meeting, the only reason why I was sitting in this truck was because I wanted to hang out with Bella and spend more time with her.
I knew from the books that her usual group of friends would be there but I had no idea how many other people were going and the realisation that I was going to have to socialise in a large group was slowly getting to me and making me anxious. I didn't have any friends on Forks high school and the only people I hanged out with were the Cullens, and now Bella.
One thing I was sure about is that it was going to be extremely awkward. I didn't know what most of them thought about me but I knew it wasn't anything positive, and then the prospect of having to deal with Mike's jealousy all day..
I glanced at Bella, the bright sunlight was making her face glow and colouring her hair a slightly lighter shade.
"Do you think your dad suspects we are dating?" I asked her.
She glanced at me sideways then looked back at the road and smiled.
"Are we?"
I smiled, unable to keep my eyes off of her.
"You do realise the only reason I'm in this car is because I want to hang out with you. They would have to drag my dead body to a large social gathering like this" I laughed.
I saw her smile widen, she bit her bottom lip.
"I'm only happy because you're going" She said softly.
My heart skipped a beat. I felt butterflies at her words and the longer I continued to look at her. I didn't know what she was doing to me but the fact that she loved spending time with me, let alone that I was the reason behind her happiness made me feel all warm and giddy inside. She glanced at me to see I was still staring at her and her cheeks got red again.
I couldn't help but smile widely "You're cute" I said before looking out of the window.
She didn't respond but I saw her smiling.
"So, who else is going to be there?
"I believe it's going to be 5 boys and 6 girls" she said "I think you know most of them. They often sit at my table"
I knew that I didn't like most of them. The only one of her friends that I genuinely liked was Angela, because she was the only one who was genuine and sincerely cared about Bella. Eric was a bit of a jokester but he was nice and I didn't have enough information about Ben to form an opinion about him. The others though..
"Kind of, I've never talked to most of them" I answered and sighed "Not to sound clingy but do you mind if I spend most of my time around you"
She smiled "I was kind of hoping you would"
I smiled back at her, the warm feeling spreading through my body again.
"You shouldn't neglect your friends though" I said "At least.. some of them"
I immediately regretted my words as I saw her face sadden. I just didn't want her to throw other aspects of her life away for me like she did for Edward. A knot formed in my stomach when I thought about Edward. I'd been so caught up in spending time with Bella and being temporarily happy that I forgot about the world and all of my problems, but suddenly it felt like reality was going to come crushing down on me.
I wished I would forget about him, he was a thorn in my side at this point.
"Unless you really don't like spending time with them" I added.
"I do. They're fine" she sighed "But the truth is I wasn't looking forward to go today, until you said you wanted to go with me"
I leaned forward and kissed her cheek then sat back into my seat.
"W-what was that for" She stammered and blushed.
"You're sweet and that was my apology for making you feel bad" I smiled at her.
"Oh" she said as the red of her cheeks deepened.
I chuckled and looked back at the road "Where are we meeting them?"
"Um" she said before pausing for a moment to collect her thoughts "We're meeting at The Newtons' Olympic Outfitters store. We're almost there."
We arrived at a parking lot behind a small store and there were *lots* of people waiting for us. They were all gathered around a shiny, black Suburban. I recognised a few of them; there were six girls standing together and the only three I recognised were Lauren, Angela and Jessica. Mike and Eric were standing a bit further from them, talking with two other guys I didn't recognise. I thought I saw Tyler stand alone leaning against a different car, a Sentra.
We pulled up next to the Suburban and unlocked our seat bells. I breathed slowly in and out through my nose trying to prepare myself when suddenly I felt a pair of wet lips giving me a quick kiss on my cheek.
I looked up and saw Bella was biting her lip, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips.
"What was that for?" I chuckled, a wide grin on my face.
"For being here with me" She said and got out of the truck. I smiled in myself then got out, closing the door and making my way next to Bella. Mike saw us and a smile appeared on his face, then he came running into our direction.
Oh boy.. here we go.
His smile disappeared as soon as it came when he noticed me standing next to her. His eyes locked with mine for a second then he smiled at Bella.
"You came!" He said delighted. "And I said it would be sunny today, didn't I?"
"I told you I was coming" She responded. I bit my lip trying not to laugh and be amused at her unenthusiastic reply.
"We're just waiting for Lee and Samantha… and I didn't know you invited someone else" Mike added as he looked at me again. Acting as if I wasn't standing right there and hearing him.
"Yeah" Bella said "I hope that's not a problem"
"Not at all" he replied, forcing a smile.
"Will you ride in my car? It's that or Lee's Mom's minivan" Mike said.
"Sure" She replied.
"How many people go into your car?" I asked him. He didn't looked pleased with me talking to him.
"8 people excluding the driver" He said dryly.
"Right" I said as I pressed my lips together.
"Hey Mike, look at this!" I heard Eric laugh and shout, he exchanged one last look with Bella then returned to his friends.
I looked at Bella and smiled, she smiled back at me and shook her head. Edward's mind reading abilities weren't needed to know exactly what she was thinking.
Four other people, two of which I assumed were Lee and Samantha arrived and we got ready to leave.
I sat with Bella in the back of Mike's suburban. I let Bella sit at the seat by the window so she could look outside and enjoy the sunny, open blue sky. His car was packed full which was both cozy and suffocating.
According to Mike it was only a 15 to 30 minutes drive to the beaches and I would mostly watch Bella as she looked outside, leaning her face on her hand while the cool wind blew through her hair- her face glowing from what I assumed was the nice weather. As I peaked to the front seats I saw Jessica was trying to get Mike's attention and talking his ears off, but him ignoring her to watch me and Bella every now and then was getting on my nerves.
I looked out of the windows and saw we were driving on a long stretched road with nothing but green forests edging along the way, and a beautiful wide river going beneath it.
When I saw the beach in the distance, it was breathtaking- more beautiful than I had imagined. It looked nothing like the sunny, tropical beaches I used to go to on trips in Europe that had wide shores with colourful golden sand and a blue ocean. Instead, everything here was brown and gray even the water and the shore wasn't made of sand, but rocky- made out of thousands of different stones. There was only a thin border of sand at the edge of the sea. Several, large sheer islands rose out of the water near the edge and a large, dense forest edged along the shore.
The sun was standing high in the horizon, beams of sunlight reflecting in the gray ocean. On the water there were pelicans peacefully floating abroad while seagulls flew low in the sky above them.
"Wow.. it's beautiful" I said.
Bella's lips curled into a smile as she watched the beach. "I know" She said as she sighed "I loved coming here with Charlie as a child. It was one of my favourite places"
"I can see why" I said as I smiled at her.
As we arrived and parked our car I saw the others had already arrived before us. We all got out and it was a relief to finally be out of the humid car and into the fresh air that had a soft, cool breeze.
We made our way to the beach, Mike leading the way to some driftwood logs that were laying around across the rocky shore. I saw there was a fire circle already in place.
Bella sat down at one of benches near the fire and I sat next to her. Girls gathered around us to chat but Mike was still clinging to Bella and kept talking with minimal response from her, he wasn't even paying attention to the guys that were standing close to us. it was exhausting for me so I couldn't imagine how it was for her. I wondered if she was just too nice to tell him to get lost, but I wasn't going to speak on her behalf unless he'd cross a line.
"Have you ever seen a driftwood fire?" He asked her. I rolled my eyes and ignored him to look around me and enjoy the view in solitude, watching the waves silently clash against the rocks. Mike kneeled by the fire, lighting one of the smaller sticks with his cigarette lighter.
"No" Bella said.
"You'll like this then. Watch the colors." He lit another small branch and laid it alongside the first.
"It's blue" she said.
"The salt does it. Pretty, isn't it?" He lit one more piece, and placed it alongside the others.
He finally stopped talking and took a seat next to her on the other side, she immediately reacted and shove away from him towards me as I felt her leg brush against mine. We watched the blue flames crackle in silence for a moment before I turned to her and whispered into her ear.
"Do you want to break away from the group?"
She nodded and we stood up, Mike who was talking to Jessica now turned around and stared after us as we walked away.
We walked together across the long shore, the chattering becoming a mere background noise in the distance. The beach looked so much better without having a bunch of loud teenagers socialising all around you. Now that I wasn't feeling tense I could actually enjoy the beauty of it.
"Thank you for saving me from that" Bella said as she walked alongside me, kicking against the small rocks on the ground.
"That's what I do" I laughed as I watched the ebb water flowing across the sand on the beach.
"Is he always like that?" I asked as I looked at her.
She nodded and sighed "He's always following me around and talking to me"
"Maybe it's me but it seems that you don't really like him doing that"
"It can get annoying sometimes but I don't know how to get rid of him"
"Just tell him to get lost"
She looked at me
"He's a nice guy. I don't want to hurt his feelings"
I sighed "You're always sacrificing yourself for others, it hurts to see sometimes"
"As long as other people are happy it doesn't matter how I feel" she shrugged.
"It does, Bella. You're selfless and that's what I like about you but you have to prioritise your own feelings too"
She smiled at me "I'll think about it" she paused "And besides.. I am happy" she added quietly as she played with her hair.
I looked at her and raised my eyebrows "You are?"
"Yes. Because you are here with me"
I looked at the sea to try and hide the stupid grin on my face. "I can't be mad at you if you're going to be cute all the time"
"Why would you be mad at me?"
"Because"' I sighed "From all these people your happiness and well being is the only one I care about"
She was biting her lip, the corners twitching into a smile.
We stopped walking and I looked back at the group. They were laughing, some of the guys were throwing pebbles in the water as others were drawing something into the sand or sitting around the fire. Mike sat alone on the bench with Jessica and was still talking with her.
"They seem to be having a good time" I said.
She glanced at them "Yeah. They do"
She looked down and put her hands in her back pockets then took a step closer to me. She nervously moved her foot along the rocks. I was confused about what she wanted me to do.
Then Eric came running at us.
"Hey guys, a few people are going to hike and see the tidal pools, do you want to come?"
I looked over at Bella "Do you want to go?"
She shrugged "Only if you are"
I smiled as I looked over to Eric "Sure we'll come"
"Alright I'll let the others know" He said and ran back to the group.
"Are you sure you want to get back to the group?" I asked her
"No.. Do you?"
"No" I said as we laughed together.
"I don't know if you noticed but I'm kind of stressed out and socially anxious around other people"
"Is that why you often sit alone at school?" She asked and I nodded.
"I feel the same way" she sighed "I never really fit in with other people my age even back in Phoenix"
"Me too" I said "I never really had many friends"
"Yeah me neither" She replied biting her bottom lip "In a way I always considered my mom to be my best friend" I saw her expression sadden as she mentioned René.
"Yeah same.. but with my brothers"
She smiled "Your actual brothers?"
I nodded. Thinking about my family was making me feel sad.
"What were they like?"
I looked at the group and saw they were preparing to leave.
"I'll tell you about them later. I'd love to hear more about your mom as well"
She smiled and we joined back with the group reluctantly, every part of me yearned to talk with Bella and learn more about her. The other guys and girls didn't exist to me, which was a bad thing to admit. But in the end I wasn't there for them- only for this sweet, shy girl that I shared a lot in common with.
It was a short hike through the woods, the group that decided to go was laughing and bantering around us. Bella walked behind them and slower than the rest but I stayed at her side, watching as she carefully tried to avoid the branches of the trees and roots on the ground. I searched for her hand and took it in mine, seeing her face go red at my touch. She intertwined her fingers with mine and clasped onto it tightly as I helped her to avoid falling and step over some loose branches on the forest ground. Soon we would fall behind but all the way she never let go of my hand, nor did I want to let go of hers- if only because I was worried she would slip over something random and get hurt.
Eventually we catched up with the others, arriving at another rocky shore that had multiple tidal pools ranging from small to large; surrounded with pebbled banks. A river was flowing past us on its way to the ocean.
Bella let go of my hand and sat down on a rock by one of the largest pools; curiously investigating and staring into the deep, blue and transparent pond below her. I sat next to her and looked down at the motionless starfish that clinged to the rocks, the crabs and the green weeds that flowed freely through the water.
She sat closer to me and leaned her head on my shoulder before moving her hand on top of mine, I looked at them and turned her hand around to caress her palm with my fingers before locking them together and resting them on my leg. We sat at silence as I looked towards the sea, watching the others who were courageously jumping across the rocks over the ocean pounds while trying to balance themselves.
This was the most peaceful I had felt in a long time. It wasn't the beach or the view, albeit gorgeous I wouldn't have felt that way if I had sat there alone. In fact it would have been the complete opposite because I'd feel alone, tense and uncomfortable. It was crazy how one person could change your whole world and perspective just by being in your presence. The silence wasn't unbearable either, for once I didn't need spoken words to feel like I was right where I belonged; I felt at home even though I was far from where my home was.
Some of the guys got hungry and we stood up to get back to the beach. Bella tried to keep up with the others this time and even though I held her hand, inevitably she almost fell a few times. I could catch her just in time and steady her before she hit the ground, except for one time when she fell over a thick branch and I helped her up to see she scraped her elbows; her palms were dirty and her shirt and jeans were stained green.
"Are you okay?" I asked, investigating her elbow.
She looked at the slight abrasion on her elbow then down at her stained clothes.
"I'm such an idiot" she groaned in frustration.
"A little bit" I laughed and teased her
She frowned at me but I couldn't help but find it endearing.
"You're just clumsy and walking too fast isn't working in your favour"
She groaned again and I slowly picked a leaf from her messy hair. She stared at me, blushing. I smiled at her but this only deepened the red in her cheeks.
"L-lets get back to the others. They're probably waiting for us" she muttered.
I took her- now dirty hand in mine again, holding on more tightly this time as we continued our hike.
At the time we arrived- as the last ones, they were already passing around food around the fire. There were a few new faces who joined the group that stayed behind in the time we were at the tidal pools.
They were all guys and girls with a copper skin tone and sleek black hair, ranging from long to short. All of the guys were shirtless, showing off their muscled bodies and abs- too fit and muscled for people who looked like teenagers, as if they spent a lot of time working out and lifting in the gym- even the girls. They weren't wearing any shoes either only shorts. They were laughing and playfully wrestling with each other.
From their looks that resembled Native Americans I assumed this had to be the Quileute clan from the reservation. In other words: werewolves. I wondered if Jacob was there as well, but I prayed silently that this wouldn't be the case.
We sat down at the driftwood log in front of the fire, next to Angela as the copper skinned guys rushed to get a claim of the sandwiches and soda that Mike was passing around.
I sat my backpack in front of me and opened it, picking a few of the sandwiches and bottles of soda I brought myself. I kept one pair then turned to Bella "Do you want one?" I offered as I smiled at her. She smiled, happily accepting my offer.
"Thank you" she said as she took the sandwiches and bottle of soda while tucking her hair behind her ear. I looked up at Angela who was sitting quietly and patiently waiting for her turn.
I took another sandwich and soda bottle and offered it to her. She was caught by surprise and flinched a bit as I talked to her but smiled politely, her eyes sparkling in joy. She seemed happy that someone was noticing her, most of the others didn't pay attention to her sitting there.
"Oh.. thank you so much" She said shyly as she smiled and accepted my offer. I smiled back at her then sat back and ate my sandwich. I glanced at Bella to see she was smiling at me before giving a kiss on my cheek, she then started to eat the sandwich I gave her. I didn't bother to share with anyone else, I only had so many sandwiches to give to the people I actually liked and the others already had their own food.
By the time Mike arrived at us to offer his food we politely declined and told him we already had our own. He walked away disappointed.
Then I looked up and saw a boy sitting on a rock across from us, leaning his arms on his knees. He looked very young, I estimated him to be 15 or 16. He had long, shiny black hair that was pulled back with a rubber band at his neck and the same copper skin like the rest of the guys from the reservation. He also had high cheekbones and dark, brown eyes. He had a masculine shaped face and features for his age but the roundness of his chin gave him a bit of a babyface.
Unlike the others he was wearing a black T-shirt and looking into our direction.
My gut feeling told me that this was Jacob Black; the last person I wanted to see there. The way he was looking at Bella made me uncomfortable and I tried hard to not think about every reason why I disliked him in the books.
I failed miserably and the scene where he manipulated Bella to kiss him by threatening suicide came to my imagination. My heart started to pound in my chest as my jaw clenched- balling my hand into a fist.
"Hey. Are you okay?" Bella asked as she wrapped her hand around my arm. She had a worried look behind her eyes.
"I'm okay" I smiled at her as I kissed her cheek. Her cheeks lightened up, a small smile appearing on her face as she leaned her head on my shoulder and continued to eat her sandwich.
The clouds went before the sun momentarily, casting a shadow across the beach and darkening the water as we continued to eat lunch.
The oldest of the Quileutes came to stand around the fire with six others as he introduced them to us. His body was more buff than the others and he looked as if he was in his mid 20's at least.
He spoke their names very quickly as he pointed to each of them respectively, but I remembered most of them; Quil, Embry, Jared, Paul and Jessica and just as I thought the boy was named Jacob.
The older looking person who spoke the names introduced himself as Sam. The alpha.
It was easy for me to look past their pretentious act of being an ordinary group of friends, when I knew what they were in reality. Some of the guys were staring into my direction, a blank expression on their faces.
After everyone finished eating they broke up in a couple of different groups: Some of them continued to skip rocks across the water, while a few others were gathering a new group of people to go back to the tidal pools. Mike went with Jessica to the shop in the village, and a few people of Sam's pack joined them while others joined the hiking expedition to the pools.
Angela left with the hiking group and we were left alone with Lauren, Tyler and three guys from the reservation including Sam and Jacob. I got internally frustrated at the fact that he was still sitting there and questioned why he didn't go and spend time with any of the other groups instead.
Tyler and Lauren were occupying themselves with a CD player that someone had brought, and Sam was talking with the other guy so we sat there in silence with no one other than Jacob Black.
After a short moment he stood up and sat at Angela's previous spot on the driftwood log next to Bella. I took a slow breath to calm myself but Jacob being in close proximity to myself and Bella wasn't helping.
"You're Isabella Swan, aren't you?"
"Bella" She sighed as she turned to look at him.
"I'm Jacob Black." He held his hand out to her, his voice sounded open and friendly.
She shook his hand then Jacob leaned over to me offering his hand "I believe we haven't met yet, I'm Jacob" he said, smiling politely.
Who was I to judge this sweet, innocent boy on something he hadn't done yet? I knew that wasn't fair but I couldn't fake my disliking to him, or get the images out of my head.
I glared at his hand for a moment before looking at his brown eyes. I didn't shake his hand.
"Adam" I said, keeping a straight face. I quickly looked away from him, directing my attention at the crackling fire in front of me.
He swallowed as he slowly withdrew his hand and dropped his eyes. I felt horrible, this Jacob didn't deserve me being rude to him. Future Jacob however, did.
He cleared his throat and before the awkward situation that was unfolding got unbearable he looked back at Bella again. "So you bought my dad's truck" he smiled.
"Oh" she said as she smiled back at him "You're Billy's son. I probably should remember you"
"No, I'm the youngest of the family — you would remember my older sisters."
"Rachel and Rebecca" she recalled "Are they here?" She said as she looked around to examine the girls from the reservation.
"No" he shook his head "Rachel got a scholarship to Washington State, and Rebecca married a Samoan surfer — she lives in Hawaii now."
"Married. Wow."
"So how do you like the truck?" he asked.
"I love it. It runs great." She responded.
"Yeah, but it's really slow," he laughed. "I was so relived when Charlie bought it. My dad wouldn't let me work on building another car when we had a perfectly good vehicle right there."
"It's not that slow" She objected.
"Have you tried to go over sixty?"
"No," she admitted.
"Good. Don't." He grinned.
"It does great in a collision"
"I don't think a tank could take out that old monster," he agreed with another laugh.
"So you build cars?" She asked him
"When I have free time, and parts. You wouldn't happen to know where I could get my hands on a master cylinder for a 1986 Volkswagen Rabbit?" he added jokingly.
"Sorry" She laughed, "I haven't seen any lately, but I'll keep my eyes open for you."
He smiled widely at her, flashing his white teeth as I sat there listening in to their conversation. I remembered what they talked about from the book and I thought Jacob was nice when I did, and even rooted for him but all I felt now was my veins burning- as if my whole body was caught on fire.
I closed my eyes and recognised what I was feeling as jealousy. I told myself I had no reason to feel that way- he wasn't hitting on her and even if he was she wasn't mine- she was Edward's. My heart ached at that thought.
"You know Bella, Jacob?" Lauren asked
"We've sort of known each other since I was born" he laughed, smiling at Bella again.
"How nice." Lauren said in a condescending tone. I disliked this girl almost as much as I did Jessica.
"Bella," she called "I was just saying to Tyler that it was too bad none of the Cullens could come out today. Didn't anyone think to invite them?"
I shook my head, her mean girl attitude was getting old fast and she obviously didn't actually care that none of the others were able to come- she never made an attempt to speak to any of us.
"Actually, Adam is a Cullen" Bella answered as she glanced over at me, then all of their eyes were looking into my direction. A few of the other guys from the reservation who were kicking a ball to each other near the waves came walking from across the beach and joined us as if they overheard what she said.
"I thought you said this guy was a Cullen?"
"He is" Bella said.
"He doesn't look like one"
"Stinks like one though" Paul joked and laughed.
"Do you guys know them?" Lauren asked as she turned halfway towards Sam.
Sam was still staring into my direction, there was anger and fury behind his dark eyes.
"The Cullens don't come here"
I ignored them, looking away from the glaring eyes. My nails were dug so deep into the palm of my hands that it was going to leave marks- I was burning with anger and adrenaline so much it was overwhelming, and I felt if any of them said another thing to set me off that I was going to snap or my fight or flight response was going to activate.
I looked sideways at Bella and saw she was feeling incredibly uncomfortable too. She was staring at Sam for a moment then her eyes glanced over to the others- as if what they said had confused or shocked her. She stayed in that state momentarily before looking at the ground.
Jacob was biting his lip, analysing the situation before he turned to Bella again.
"So is Forks driving you insane yet?"
As an exception I couldn't be more relieved that he was talking to her and breaking the tension. The mood was lightened in an instant.
"Oh, I'd say that's an understatement." She answered.
I was still looking away- staring across the long, rocky shore in an attempt to calm myself down as I felt Bella's eyes were on me for a moment before she turned back to Jacob.
"Do you want to walk down the beach with me? She asked him.
They stood up and Bella turned towards me.
"I'll be back soon okay?"
I didn't respond. I wanted to talk but the words were stuck in my throat. I just needed some time on my own so all the things I were feeling would subside.
The expression on her face saddened as she suddenly hesitated but then they slowly walked away.
I put my head in my hands, running them through my hair before I watched them disappear, walking side by side.
Bella's POV
As we walked north across the multihued stones toward the driftwood seawall, the clouds finally closed ranks across the sky, causing the sea to darken and the temperature to drop. I put on my jacket and closed the zipper, then shoved my hands deep into the pockets.
"So you're, what, sixteen?" I asked
"I just turned fifteen," he confessed, flattered.
"Really?" My face was full of false surprise. "I would have thought you were older."
"I'm tall for my age," he explained.
"Do you come up to Forks much?" I asked
"Not too much," he admitted with a frown. "But when I get my car finished I can go up as much as I want — after I get my license," he amended.
"Who was that other boy Lauren was talking to? He seemed a little old to be hanging out with us."
"That's Sam — he's nineteen," he informed me.
"What was that he was saying about the Cullens?" I asked innocently.
"The Cullens? Oh, they're not supposed to come onto the reservation." He looked away, out toward James Island, as he confirmed what I'd thought I'd heard in Sam's voice.
"You said the guy who came with you is a Cullen?" He looked to the ground as he asked this, the expression on his face was hard to read.
"He is" I said "Doctor Carlisle and his wife took him in"
He turned his head to look back at where Adam was sitting on the driftwood log, as still as before.
"What's his deal anyway?"
I wanted to groan at the condescending tone in his voice. The way he talked about Adam made it hard for me to keep up my act.
"There's no deal. He's just used to being on himself" I snapped, my voice hard.
"So what, he's an introvert?"
"Something like that" I said, hoping he would drop the subject.
"So why aren't the Cullens supposed to come here?"
He glanced back at me, biting his lip. "Oops. I'm not supposed to say anything about that."
"Oh, I won't tell anyone, I'm just curious." I tried to make my smile alluring but I was still reeling so I couldn't get more than a half assed smile from my lips.
He smiled back, though, looking allured. Then he lifted one eyebrow and his voice was even huskier than before.
"Do you like scary stories?" he asked ominously.
"I love them," I enthused, making an effort to smolder at him.
Jacob strolled to a nearby driftwood tree that had its roots sticking out like the attenuated legs of a huge, pale spider. He perched lightly on one of the twisted roots while I sat beneath him on the body of the tree. He stared down at the rocks, a smile hovering around the edges of his broad lips. I could see he was going to try to make this good. I focused on keeping the vital interest I felt out of my eyes.
"Do you know any of our old stories, about where we came from — the Quileutes, I mean?" he began.
"Not really," I admitted.
"Well, there are lots of legends, some of them claiming to date back to the Flood — supposedly, the ancient Quileutes tied their canoes to the tops of the tallest trees on the mountain to survive like Noah and the ark." He smiled, to show me how little stock he put in the histories. "Another legend claims that we descended from wolves — and that the wolves are our brothers still. It's against tribal law to kill them.
"Then there are the stories about the cold ones." His voice dropped a little lower.
"The cold ones?" I asked
"Yes. There are stories of the cold ones as old as the wolf legends, and some much more recent. According to legend, my own great-grandfather knew some of them. He was the one who made the
treaty that kept them off our land." He rolled his eyes.
"Your great-grandfather?" I encouraged.
"He was a tribal elder, like my father. You see, the cold ones are the natural enemies of the wolf—well, not the wolf, really, but the wolves that turn into men, like our ancestors. You would call them werewolves."
"Werewolves have enemies?"
"Only one."
I stared at him earnestly, hoping to disguise my impatience as admiration.
"So you see," Jacob continued, "the cold ones are traditionally our enemies. But this pack that came to our territory during my great-grandfather's time was different. They didn't hunt the way others of their kind did — they weren't supposed to be dangerous to the tribe. So my great grandfather made a truce with them. If they would promise to stay off our lands, we wouldn't expose them to the pale faces."
He winked at me.
"If they weren't dangerous, then why… ?" I tried to understand, struggling not to let him see how seriously I was considering his ghost story.
"There's always a risk for humans to be around the cold ones, even if they're civilized like this clan was. You never know when they might get too hungry to resist." He deliberately worked a thick edge of
menace into his tone.
"What do you mean, 'civilized'?"
"They claimed that they didn't hunt humans. They supposedly were somehow able to prey on animals
instead."
I tried to keep my voice casual. "So how does it fit in with the Cullens? Are they like the cold ones your greatgrandfather met?"
"No." He paused dramatically. "They are the same ones."
He must have thought the expression on my face was fear inspired by his story. He smiled, pleased, and continued.
"There are more of them now, a new female and a new male, but the rest are the same. In my
great-grandfather's time they already knew of the leader, Carlisle. He'd been here and gone before your people had even arrived." He was fighting a smile.
"And what are they?" I finally asked. "What are the cold ones?"
He smiled darkly.
"Blood drinkers," he replied in a chilling voice. "Your people call them vampires."
I stared out at the rough surf after he answered, not sure what my face was exposing.
"You have goose bumps," he laughed delightedly.
"You're a good storyteller," I complimented him, still staring into the waves.
"Pretty crazy stuff, though, isn't it? No wonder my dad doesn't want us to talk about it to anyone."
I couldn't control my expression enough to look at him yet. "Don't worry, I won't give you away."
"I guess I just violated the treaty," he laughed.
"I'll take it to the grave," I promised, and then I shivered.
"Seriously, though, don't say anything to Charlie. He was pretty mad at my dad when he heard that some of us weren't going to the hospital since Dr. Cullen started working there."
"I won't, of course not."
"So do you think we're a bunch of superstitious natives or what?" he asked in a playful tone, but with a
hint of worry. I still hadn't looked away from the ocean.
I turned and smiled at him as normally as I could.
"No. I think you're very good at telling scary stories, though. I still have goose bumps, see?" I held up my arm.
"Cool." He smiled.
"But the reason why I asked about Adam" he continued "You said the Cullens took him in recently?"
"They did" I nodded, wondering where he was going with this.
"He doesn't look like any of them, like the cold ones I mean. According to legend they wouldn't let any human close enough to expose their secret" he paused, a smile tugging at his lips "Unless as you can imagine, to eat them"
He laughed "But it's just a story, of course"
"Right" I said as I tried to sound my fake laugh convincing, still staring blankly in the space in front of me.
Adam's POV
I sat on the driftwood log after Bella and Jacob were long gone- half lost in thought and half listening in to Lauren's and Tyler's conversation.
I was mentally preparing myself for the questions Bella was going to have after what Jacob would have told her when I saw them walk back into my direction, just seeing Bella was enough to lighten my mood.
"Hey.. do you want to take a walk?" Bella asked. Jacob smiled at her then ran to Embry and Paul who were standing a few miles away from the fireplace.
I nodded and we walked together along the long shore, across the thin border of sand that edged the water of the ocean. I looked sideways to see the sun setting in the distance- colouring the sky into an bright yellowish-orange, the orange sunlight reflecting beautifully in the ocean. Some blue patches were still visible but darkening slowly- most of the clouds had drifted away from the sun but were still threatening to invade at any moment. The breeze that came from the waves was colder now.
The view was gorgeous and relaxing, as was the fresh air.
Bella shivered as she pulled the sleeves of her jacket over her hands.
"I talked with Jacob" she said "He told me a bit about your family, and why they aren't allowed near the reservation"
I nodded and took a deep breath as I looked down at the sand, still trying to figure out what to say to her about the Cullens.
"Is that why you acted the way you did?" She asked "When he introduced himself"
I shook my head "It wasn't because of that it was just-" I sighed "it doesn't matter"
She looked over to me.
"Jealousy?" She asked
I nodded
"Jacob he's.. kind of one of my oldest friends. His dad and Charlie have been friends since we were babies"
"I know, but it's like Jacob probably told you- I'm a Cullen, he's a Quileute. We're fated to be enemies anyway"
"Because of some old horror story?"
"Not just that. We kind of.. live different lifestyles"
I sat on the sand near the water, facing the sunset as she sat next to me sideways with her knees bent.
"The view is gorgeous" I said
"Yeah it is" she smiled as she drew a circle in the sand with her index finger. We sat and watched the sun in silence for a moment. I looked down at the circle she drew and turned it into a smiley, then gave it long straight hair and a blush on the cheeks.
"What's that" she asked
"That's you" I chuckled
She laughed and made an attempt to draw me next to it, doing a considerable better job than I did. Then she turned them into stick figures holding hands.
"Now it's better" she said, smiling.
I bit my lip trying to hide my smile.
"That's cute"
I wrote AB on top of the figures. "Perfect" I said and she smiled, playing with her hair.
"Bella.." I said
"Yes?"
"Before I'll tell you this you have to promise me that you won't tell anyone, even Jacob or your dad"
She looked up at me, a determined and focused look in her eyes and nodded "I promise"
I licked my lips "What exactly did Jacob tell you about the Cullens?"
She took a deep breath "So don't get mad at me but I kind of tried to trick it out of him"
"Tricked it out of him how?" I asked, knowing I wasn't going to like the answer.
"I tried to flirt- it worked better than I thought" she said, her voice sounding full of disbelief. "But then he was kind of mean about you so I had a hard time keeping up the act"
I sighed and shook my head, my lack of reaction probably gave away I already knew she was going to do that.
"You don't seem surprised" she said.
"I can't say that I like that you did that. I understand that you were curious but why didn't you come to me?"
She shrugged "Every time I try to talk about the subject you divert the conversation"
"You're not wrong"' I sighed "But you never asked about my family"
"Because those aren't the people I were really interested in" She said, drawing lines into the sand. "And now I am even more confused than I was before"
"So, what did he tell you?"
She took a deep breath "It turns out his dad is one of the Quileute elders" she paused "And he told me some of their old legends- mostly trying to scare me I think and he told me one.." She stopped and swallowed
"About?"
"About vampires" She whispered
I ran my hand through my hair. She was startled at my silence.
"So is it true?"
"Bella there's so much more to this world than you think there is, and I don't want to lie to you so yes- it's true"
"Wow" she said "I knew there was something different about them"
"Doesn't that scare you, the thought that the people I live with are vampires?"
"It doesn't really matter to me" she said "But you.. you're not a vampire"
"You're right. I'm not"
"So how come you're living with them and not-"
"Being eaten?" I laughed.
"Yes but Jacob mentioned something about that too, he said that they didn't hunt.. people- that they're not supposed to be dangerous because they only hunt animals"
"He was right" I confirmed
"But he also said the Quileutes still didn't want them on their land, just in case"
"That's also true.."
"So how come you're living.. with them?"
"It's a long story but long story short when I arrived here.. in Forks I didn't have anyone but they embraced me and gave me a home, a family" I paused "And trusted me to keep their secret.. which I kind of broke right now" I sighed
"I'm sorry" she whispered
"It's okay. You deserve to know and you were going to find out anyway"
"How?" She sighed "See that's what I don't get. You look human but sometimes you say things you can't possibly know"
"Like I said there's more to this world than you can imagine.. beyond vampires and werewolves"
"Werewolves?" She asked
"The story Jacob told you? The Quileutes are, supposedly descended from wolves"
"Right" she paused "I wasn't really paying attention to that part" she admitted as she blushed.
I laughed "Of course"
"What happened to your real family?" She asked, she sounded genuinely curious.
I closed my eyes trying to imagine their faces but they were blurry and deformed. I was scared that one day they were going to disappear completely and I'd forget what they look like.
"I don't remember them" I said, my voice sounded sad.
"You don't remember them at all?"
"I haven't seen them in a long time" I sighed, tears welling up in my eyes. "But I remember some things- mostly feelings. I know that I was loved and that I loved them"
She hesitated for a moment then moved her hand along the sand to slightly touch mine. The moment I felt her touch I felt an electric surge throughout my body.
I looked at our hands together, then took her hand in mine and softly brushed my thumb along her fingers, I looked up to see her smile. The warm and soft feeling of her skin sent butterflies through my stomach.
She looked up at me "I'm sorry"
"It's okay. Carlisle and Esme are great and I am very thankful for them"
"You mentioned you had brothers before. Do you remember them?"
I nodded "I know I had 3 brothers and that they were like my best friends- but now Alice is like the sister I never had"
"How about Rosalie?" She's very beautiful" she muttered
"She is, undeniably beautiful but we don't get along much. If there's anything you should know about Rosalie is that she's very protective of herself and her family so she can come across as standoffish, and rude to strangers"
She took a deep breath "You remember the jealousy you were feeling about Jacob- that's kind of how I feel about Rosalie"
"Why?" I asked
"It's like you said she's undeniably beautiful,..and a vampire"
"But" I said as I pulled her chin up and looked into her eyes "She's not you"
"There's nothing special about me" she shrugged "I'm human"
"You're special to me" I smiled "Besides, vampires aren't physically or romantically appealing to me"
She looked shocked at my confession and I chuckled at her expression.
"Why?"
"I think there's something pure and beautiful about the imperfection of being human, and loving someone with all their flaws" I paused "Vampires are too perfect.. too unnatural and not to mention too cold. It's like dating an marble statue"
She was staring at me, of course she wouldn't understand. After all she was supposed to be obsessed with Edward Cullen, and was likely already having thoughts about wanting to be one.
"You wouldn't be you if you weren't clumsy and didn't fall flat on your face every few seconds, for example" I laughed.
She flushed and smiled widely as she looked at our hands, softly brushing her thumb along my knuckles.
"Anyway you asked about my family but how about yours.. what was you mother like?" I asked.
"She looks a lot like me, but she's prettier" She said as I looked at her in disbelief.
"I have too much Charlie in me. She's more outgoing than I am, and braver. She's irresponsible and slightly eccentric, and she's a very unpredictable cook. And like I said she's my best friend."
She stopped, looking down as she continued to draw lines into the sand- her voice sounded sad whenever she talked about René and her old home.
She was right about René being irresponsible. If only she realised she was so much better than her mother and that part of the reason why is because she had so much of Charlie in her
"I do see Charlie in you" I said as I smiled at her.
"You do?"
"Yeah you're both slightly awkward, but you have a good heart and are selfless to a fault"
She bit her lip as her cheeks flushed.
"But.. you're more responsible than he is and probably a better cook" I chuckled
"What was it like to live with Charlie for awhile?" She asked
"A bit awkward as you can imagine..and he gave me a lecture once because I sneaked out to the woods" I paused "Also he didn't cook and ordered lots of take out so I made him pasta one day"
"That sounds like him" she giggled
"But he's great honestly. He took me in when he didn't have to do that and I can see that he loves you a lot even though he has a hard time showing it- I also think he's not over your mother"
She sighed "Yeah I think he never really got over their divorce. I feel bad for him"
"Yeah" I said "He'll find someone though"
"I hope so" she replied, a small smile on her face.
We watched the sunset as she snuggled closer to me. I looked at her and played with a strand of her hair, watching her face go red at my touch.
"Bella. Can I tell you something?"
She tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear snuggling even closer to me.
"Sure"
"I haven't told you this about me but I'm neurodivergent"
She looked up at me curiously "What does that mean?"
"It means I have been diagnosed with autism when I was a child" I paused "Most people have a neurotypical brain but mine works a bit differently from others. It means I struggle more with social communication and I have a tendency to hyper fixate on things..and even people."
"Is that why you're alone a lot and don't fit in with others?"
I nodded "I never really fit in anywhere, even with other neurodivergent people." I shrugged " I didn't have any friends so I'm used to being on my own and I grew to prefer it, because in that way the only person that can disappoint me is myself"
She looked up at me as she listened attentively "That sounds like me all my life. Do you think that maybe my brain works similar to yours?"
"I have a theory about you"
"You have a theory about me?"
I nodded "I do think you're neurodivergent because I see myself in you in a lot of ways, but you seem to struggle a lot less with socialising than I do"
She shrugged "I blush and stumble over my words a lot and have no awareness of my surroundings"
She took a deep breath "I'm awkward"
I smiled "To be honest I think a lot of that is just you being shy and adorable"
She blushed then rested her head on my shoulder.
"I always felt like there was something different about me and that's why I didn't fit in with other boys and girls of my age. Like there is a glitch in my brain and maybe the things I am seeing are somehow different from others" She explained.
"I'll admit the way you think and behave isn't very typical" I chuckled.
I saw she wiped her tears away with the sleeve of her jacket "I know. I'm a freak"
"Not at all" I sighed "You make me feel more understood than most people. Being around you I feel like I don't have to pretend and put on a mask because I know you wouldn't judge me, it's the most normal I felt in a long time." I paused for a short moment "And that Bella, being able to see past people's flaws to build a bond with them is what makes you special"
I looked at her to see her reaction, she just looked up at me. I stared into her eyes, there was sadness behind them.
"If you are a freak then freaks are beautiful, selfless and kind" I smiled "In that case I wouldn't want you to be normal"
A smile appeared on her face and her face became visibly red. I was afraid she lost her tongue because of my stupid emotional rant. Instead she nestled her head into the crook of my neck while snuggling up to me as close as possible as we held hands. Her body warmth against mine felt like an omen from Heaven. My heart was beating fast.
I looked at our hands, still softly brushing my thumb along hers.
"It's not a date.. remember" I said.
"Definitely not a date" she whispered.
"You said you hyper fixate on people sometimes.. when was the last time that happened" she asked, her voice almost a whisper.
I stayed quiet for a moment watching the setting sun in the distance.
"Since the first time I laid my eyes on you"
I knew it was true but this was the first time I admitted it to myself. I had in fact been hyperfixating over her in the last few weeks and I hated it. I told myself I was never going to be like Bella and Edward again because being obsessed with someone in the way they occupy your every thought was extremely unhealthy- I had been there and wasn't going back to that. I was glad that unlike them I at least had some self awareness about my bad habits.
I thought about why I related to Edward; in a way he was the shadow parts that I didn't like about myself. My own worst nightmare. Perhaps that why I didn't like him as much as I thought I would. We would often dislike people for the parts that reflected the things we hated, or feared within ourselves.
Bella looked up into my eyes again, our faces only an inch away from each other. I stared into the reflection of her eyes, the brown colour looked like a pool of honey from the bright reflection of the setting sun that fell across her face- making them shine.
"Because I feel the same way" She answered quietly, playing with a strand of her hair.
I then glanced at her lips as I felt her warm breath resting on mine, butterflies were dancing in my stomach and my heart pounded fast in anticipation. I closed my eyes and leaned in slowly, my lips brushed hers and as I felt her open her mouth slightly.
I heard someone clear their throat. I looked up and saw it was Jacob, breaking all tension and ruining the moment- giving me more reasons to hate him.
For fuck sakes.
Finally the mass of clouds took over the sky and rain started pouring.
Jacob stood with his hands in his pocket and an awkward expression on his face. I stood up and walked away pushing against his shoulder. Paul saw it and called after me.
"Hey asshole what's your problem?"
"Leave me alone" I said but he came running and pushed me with two hands hard on my back, onto the ground- making me fall forward on the wet sand. He laughed and I stood up then punched him with my fist in anger, hitting him on his cheek. This sent him into a frenzy and he ran into me as we continued to fight. He hit me harder and faster than I hit him, my attempts didn't even seem to phase him.
The others came running to us after they saw it happening, circling around us. Some stared at us in horror as others like Tyler and Eric and a few other guys were excitedly cheering us on.
"Fight! Fight! Fight!" They shouted.
"Ugh, boys" Lauren rolled her eyes.
He kept punching me in my stomach then threw me on the ground, not being able to stop himself from punching me at different spots on my body.
"Please don't hurt him" I heard Bella plead as she tried to pull him away from me. He threw his arm backwards pushing her away roughly. I blacked out completely as he did that and kicked him off me, then got on top of him, grabbed the collar of his shirt and punched him repeatedly in his face.
After this I was pulled away from him at my arms by Mike, and Paul's friends came running to get him away from me.
I tried to run back at him again but Mike stopped me "Ho ho. Take it easy tiger"
"Hey that's enough! Take a breather Paul!" Sam commanded. He stood in front of him, like a commander hovering over one of his soldiers as the others- his friends or "betas" were struggling in their attempts to control him and hold him back as he tried to throw them off of him. Paul looked furious into my direction, foaming at his mouth as a wild animal ready to devour it's prey.
Despite the heavy rain, most of them were still shirtless.
Sam turned to look at me, his eyes full of anger. "This is why the Cullens don't come here" He shouted, directing his attention to the crowd before looking back at me.
"Don't show your face here again" His voice was firm and resolute. It was a threat.
I was so angry and full of adrenaline that I didn't stop to think about the fact that he was a werewolf who could've devoured me easily if he wanted to- or didn't want to as I knew it was out of their control which made it even scarier.
It was in my own interest that I avoided Jacob and his group of friends as much as I possibly could.
"Pack it up boys. We're leaving" he commanded and gave a head nod to his pack. They all stared at me with anger and disgust on their faces and then ran after Sam as some of them pushed Paul to walk in front of them, as if they were making sure he couldn't escape. Jacob still stood there as if he was trying to process what had just happened.
"Jacob you coming?" Someone yelled after him. He glanced at me then exchanged one last look with Bella.
"I have to go but I'll see you later okay?"
"Sure" she nodded, her hands in her back pockets.
He ran away to catch up with the others. I walked the other way before Bella came running after me.
"Where are you going?" She asked, her voice full with worry.
"Away from them" I said, my voice still shaking from the anger and adrenaline.
"I'm not welcome anymore"
"Please let me look at you. You're bleeding" She said and we stopped, before turning to each other. She reached out her hand and touched my lips, then looked at the tiny bit of blood that came from it on her thumb.
"Please don't faint" I said, I tried to make it sound as a joke but there was genuine worry in my voice.
She giggled "Don't worry" she wanted to drop her hand but I stopped her, taking her wrist in my hand then pulled it up and pressed a kiss against her hand. She blushed then she leaned against me, burying her face in my chest as she listened to my heartbeat- purring softly. I wrapped my arms around her waist, leaning my chin on her head as we stood there quietly for a long moment- the rain drenching both of us.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath "This is calming me down. Thank you"
She stayed quiet and looked up at me, her cheeks glowing a crimson red.
"You're welcome" she whispered. I stared into her eyes then pulled her chin up, holding her waist with my other hand. I moved my hand to her cheek and caressed it with my thumb then closed my eyes again before leaning in and kissing her wet lips slowly and softly. She pressed her body against mine then moved her hand towards my neck, wrapping her arm around it and gently brushing it with her fingers before moving up and running her hand through my hair- tugging at it slightly.
Kissing her felt like I was ascended to Heaven. Her lips tasted soft and sweet and her touch was magical. Every thought and feeling I had before disappeared as a gush of wind.
All that mattered was this moment.