Rebellion

Ennaly slowly woke to find herself in a comfortable warm place, curled up under a blanket in the crook of Solas' arm, her head on his chest. She remained there to listen to his heartbeat, wishing that this moment could last forever. He must be awake, she realised, from the way his arms were actively wrapped around her. She didn't want to reveal that she was awake, because then the magic of this moment would be broken.

Good moments were even greater against a backdrop of troublesome times, and more so even when they were scarce. Solas was awake and could have done anything, get up, walk around, but instead, he chose to hold her close against him. She hadn't felt peace and comfort like this in months. Her face flushed at the memory of their dream and the pressure of his body on top of hers, skin on skin. She could confidently say no man had ever made her feel like he did.

But at some point, they did have to go back. Resigned, she stirred and opened her eyes. Solas had been gazing out over the mountains, where the skies started to turn orange and pink, but he turned his head at her movement.

"Good morning," he said with a smile.

She slowly unfurled and stretched. "I don't know," she said lazily. "With a dream like that, I'd rather it was night still."

Solas pulled her closer and wiped some loose strands of hair behind her ears. "It certainly was the best dream I had in a long while."

"For me too," she purred as she stared out over the colour-changing mountains in the light of dawn. "And this place is breathtaking."

Solas released a contented sigh. "No matter how much I agree with you, I think we should return soon. Duties are likely awaiting you on top of this mountain."

Ennaly wrapped her arm around his chest. "One more minute?" She didn't want to leave this perfect dream, didn't want to leave the warmth that Solas' body provided.

"One more minute," Solas agreed as he gazed at her.

She stared back, and after a few seconds, they leaned in closer to kiss. After all these months of wanting to touch, wanting to be close, it was hard to pull back now they had finally given in. Ennaly pulled him on top of her, wanting to feel his weight on her again before she had to go back and face the day. It wasn't long before their breath grew heavy with passion. Ennaly felt desire stir within her and wondered if they might have time to take their clothes off, when Solas pulled away. "We really should go back."

He rose to his feet and held out his hand to pull Ennaly up, too. Solas folded the blanket away as Ennaly refastened her hair and straightened her outfit. And then, finally, it was time for this peaceful bubble to end. Near the waterfall, Solas held out his hand. "Hold on tight, vhenan."

With some apprehension from Ennaly, they passed through the waterfall and started their ascent back to Skyhold proper. When they landed on the battlements, she felt an awkwardness overtake her. The courtyard was far from empty with the early morning hustle and bustle. One of the stable hands looked up with surprise, likely wondering where they had come from.

Ennaly didn't really want anyone to know what they'd been up to, so she increased the distance between Solas and herself. There had already been rumours before about her and Dorian because they spent so much time together, and she didn't really want to be judged now, either. People might even think she was involved with both. She didn't need any more negativity, not when the dreaded ball was getting so close.

Solas seemed to have noticed her changing demeanour as they descended the stairs from the battlements. "Well, Milady Inquisitor, I shall leave you to the multitude of duties awaiting you."

"Yeah. Josephine likes to school me in table manners at most meals. I don't know why you need so much cutlery just to eat your food. I'm growing a huge dislike for little spoons."

"Oh? I find myself to be rather fond of them," he said with a grin looking down at her, before going away to his quarters.

Ennaly watched him go, wondering when they could meet next. The next days would prove quite busy, she knew. The day after they returned from the ruined garden, she came up with an idea, and went to Solas' rotunda. There, she declared in an official manner that she would like a nice painting for her personal quarters. Solas, in a similar official manner, said that he would be happy to answer the Inquisitor's request.

"A nice forest scene in pinks and greens, I think," she said. "There aren't enough trees around and my chambers could use some more colour."

This gave Solas a good reason to gather his painting supplies and find his way to Ennaly's quarters. Most of their time together was even spent in silence, since she had to read or write reports or letters or study some information. Sometimes she'd read passages out loud, and they could have a good snicker at some of the requests or the pompous language, but every now and again something interesting passed. Occasionally they were interrupted by people bringing her things or requests to join the war room. That meant they didn't necessarily have the privacy to do whatever they wanted, but it was still nice to be together.

And she still made sure to spend time with Dorian.

"Dear Ennaly, it has not escaped my notice that a certain Elf finds his way to your chambers every afternoon?" he asked her in a low voice so they wouldn't be overheard. Ennaly was once again sitting on the pile of cushions in the corner of the library nook Dorian had claimed, a book in her hand. A Treaty on the Pagan and Heretical Customs of the Elven, was written on the cover. To prepare herself for the ball, she wanted to know what exactly Humans thought of the Dalish. Some things were downright offensive, but there were interesting chapters to read, too.

"He's painting a scene on my walls. They were awfully grey," she replied, her interest mostly in a passage she was reading.

"Painting walls? Is that some sort of Elven euphemism?" Dorian asked, leaning over to push down her book so he could grin broadly at her.

She looked up. "No. He's actually painting. You should come see sometimes."

"Really?" Dorian asked, looking crestfallen. "And you're like... both dressed and all?"

His reaction amused Ennaly. "Why are you so interested in the state of my clothes?"

"Come on, that mutual pining must have led to something."

"And what about you and Bull?"

Guilt overtook Dorian's face. "What about what? There's nothing anywhere."

"Uhuh." It was Ennaly's time to grin broadly. "That's what you're saying now, but in a few weeks, you'll be kissing like you've never been kissed before."

"As if," Dorian scoffed, before he looked up at Ennaly's suggestive smile. "Inquisitor, you minx!"

"Hush!" Ennaly whispered loudly, not wanting to be overheard.

"Does that mean...?"

"Well... We're perfectly decent when we're awake."

Gleefully, Dorian leaned in closer. "When you're awake? Meaning when you're not awake..."

It was true. When they were awake, they always kept a certain distance. But every other night, when they were asleep... They had dwelled through different versions of Skyhold through time. It was interesting to explore the differences, to observe the surrounding mountains and the different seasons in the dreams. Sometimes they'd just sit in silence, arms around each other, enjoying the comfort they gave each other. And it was a constant that at a certain point during their dream, they'd find their way towards the largest bedroom and ended up in a not-so-decent state.

Solas was more at ease during their dreams, comfortable in a way he never was when they were awake. He was a generous lover, knew how to please, and knew how to take pleasure. Ennaly let him be in control. It was clear that is what he preferred, and she found that she preferred that, too. She felt safe when they were together, and it was so good to give control away and not have to worry about all the things she had to worry about as Inquisitor.

"I'm not saying anything," she said with a grin. "And if you say anything, I swear I'll end you."

"Threats? By the Maker, I have something left to live for." He threw his arms in the air in joy.

Ennaly lowered her book. "You do know I cannot do all of this without you, right? All this research? Knowledge is power, and you are the driving force behind this. If I ever can do something for you, just let me know."

Dorian looked touched at her words. "I might hold on to that. For now, please tell me more about how important I am."

She shook her head in disapproving amusement. "After I've finished reading this section."

The painting in her chambers was slowly gaining form. It looked a bit like the fresco in the ruined garden, but in the centre was a mountain with a waterfall that ended in a pond below. Still outlined were a halla and a wolf, drinking from the water.

One of these afternoons, Ennaly and Solas enjoyed a little break on the sofa in front of the fire.

"You have a new trinket," Solas noticed.

Because of the warmth, Ennaly had her sleeves rolled up, showing the bracelet that her mother had made her. It was usually tucked out of sight under her sleeves.

"My mother sent it," she replied, lifting her hand to give Solas a better view of the beads. "She carved them. It is ironwood."

His fingers ran over the beads to inspect them. "She is skilled indeed."

"They represent the nine of our pantheon."

Solas tensed up. "Nine?"

"Yes, there are nine Gods, you dummy," Ennaly smiled.

"I am just surprised to see this here," Solas said, his fingers stopping on the bead carved to depict a wolf's head. He rolled the bead between his thumb and forefinger before releasing it.

"We've talked about this before. He's still kin to the others, isn't he?" She stirred and shifted to sit on her knees next to Solas so she could face him. "There is... a lot more to discuss around this, actually."

Solas leaned back. "Is there?" he asked, his tone impassive.

Ennaly didn't move, but shifted her eyes to the fresco on the wall. White halla and white wolf. He painted that because months ago, she declared that Solas' heroic animal should be a wolf. It was the same evening she started to develop feelings for him. It hadn't been long before...

"You remember Haven," she started. "After I faced Corypheus, I was thrown into a mineshaft. I genuinely thought I'd die there. I had a dream. In that dream, a large white wolf approached me. It... nudged me awake. I just thought it a dream, but… if I think about it, it was more than just a dream. Like, when you show me around, my dreams feel more real. I had never experienced that before you showed it to me, but I can tell you, that dream with the wolf, it was like that."

Solas stared at her, an intense, thoughtful look on his face, but he didn't say anything.

Ennaly continued. "If that wolf hadn't been there, if it hadn't awakened me, I might not be sitting here, now," she continued.

After a second's pause, Solas extended his hand and touched her cheek. "You don't know that. You are strong. You might have woken up by yourself."

"But that would have been later, and the camp might have already moved on." She grew more agitated. "I would have frozen to death in the blizzard, fallen down in the snow to die. And well, a wolf in my dreams..." Her voice turned into a whisper. "He is the only one of the Gods not being locked away, is he?"

Solas pulled his hand away and leaned back on the sofa, increasing the distance between them. He kept looking at her with a heavy expression. Perhaps he thought her silly for this.

"What do you think it was, then? You must know something about dreams like that. More than I do, certainly."

He looked thoughtful. "A wolf has many symbolisms throughout history and legend. We have passed the many statues of the wolven companions of the Emerald Knights, just to name one."

"I know that. But it's just..." She raised the Anchor between them. "You said this power is from our Gods. Perhaps he can sense it somehow? And that is why he came in that dream?" She laughed meekly. "It sounds rather conceited to think I ever might have drawn a God's attention, I know. I don't even remember what happened before this was branded on my hand."

She threw herself back on the sofa and stared at the wooden beams of the ceiling. "I don't think one of our Gods was looming over my shoulder and blessing me, like the Humans think I was blessed by Andraste. I think Corypheus just stole the orb, and it might have angered the Gods." She shuddered. "I don't know how this power latched to me and I don't know exactly what that means for me now, either. But if all of that is true, it might have been him in my dream. Or not. I might have given it more credit than it deserves."

Solas regarded her, contemplating his words carefully. "What do you remember from that dream?"

Ennaly stat upright again and wrapped her arms around her knees. "That wolf in my dreams wasn't aggressive at all. I remember it howling. It was a very primal howl, but not one from rage... If I need to give it an emotion, I think it'd be desperation." She laughed again to release some of the tension in the air. "That doesn't really sound like Fen'Harel though. What do you think it could have been?"

Solas observed her shrewdly but hesitantly, in search for words. A bit unsteadily, he grabbed her hand and took a deep breath. But instead of words, a sigh escaped his lips. Reconsidering, he pulled his hand back and for a moment, he appeared fearful.

Ennaly smiled softly and grabbed his hand again. "Don't be scared for me." She awkwardly laughed. "If that was him, at least he did not try and kill me." But her words didn't lessen Solas' apparent distraught. Wanting to calm him, Ennaly leaned forward and wanted to kiss him, but he pulled back. "Solas?" she asked in a plea.

It took Solas a few moments of silent contemplation to calm down and pull her against him. "I do not think you need to fear, either," he said quietly, but there was a slight raspiness to his tone that betrayed emotion.

She smiled faintly. "I won't, not with you here. But there is more I wanted to tell you. It... It is so unfair, really. At my clan, all the knowledge I could gather was whatever my Keeper could tell me, or others we occasionally met. But here, now that I am in the Human world, I have access to so much more knowledge. Dorian has been helping me request books from libraries while we were away, and while some of them are very racist, there are interesting perspectives too."

She shifted back so she could better face Solas. "Yesterday, I read an interesting passage. It debated linguistics and proposed that Fen'Harel is the God of rebellion rather than the God of deception. The text goes on to suggest that he might have a more nuanced motivation for sealing away the other Gods rather than mere love for trickery."

The words almost shocked Solas. Ennaly was proud of herself for finally finding things that she knew and could tell him about, instead of the other way around.

"Your knowledge of the Elven language succeeds mine," she continued. "Was the writer right? What is the original meaning of harellan, do you know?"

It took Solas a full five seconds to answer. "Whoever wrote that book is not entirely wrong. It is... interesting to see how Humans can analyse the Elven language and culture. They are bound to be right, if only occasionally."

Ennaly stared at him in anticipation. "So, the meaning is...?"

"If you search for the etymological roots, you will find the words harillen, meaning opposition, and hellathen, meaning noble struggle. Rebellion is an apt translation of the portmanteau harellan."

Ennaly stared at him, open-mouthed. "You have known all this time and never told me?"

Solas stared back impassively. "You never asked? I am all up for discussing linguistics, if you are interested in that."

"Yes, I am, but do you know what that means?" she continued, excited now. "I mean, we don't know if that is the true origin of Fen'Harel's name, but let's assume we've had the translation wrong all this time!"

She opened her left palm and stared at the Anchor. She wasn't sure what she believed, but she was open to anything that shifted her perspective to something positive.

"It's terrifying enough to think that this power does originate from a God... I know I'm far into what-ifs here, but let's say the orb was his... It doesn't sound as scary to be branded with the power of the God of rebellion as it would be the God of betrayal, right? Because isn't that what we're doing, the Inquisition? We're rebelling against the Chantry, we're rebelling against the skies, and we're rebelling against Corypheus, we have an alliance with the rebel mages? It would be rather poetic if –"

Before she could continue, Solas shot upright, pulled her closer, and kissed her passionately. His hands moved from her shoulders to her waist, and in his passion, he pulled her on top of him.

"What did I do to deserve this?" she asked playfully, sprawled on his chest, looking at the unguarded look of appreciation on Solas' face. They'd never really kissed like this when they were awake.

"You talk with such passion about your research. A spark grows in your eyes. How can I resist you, vhenan?"

"You resisted me for an awfully long time," she stated coyly as Solas pulled her back for a kiss.

"And now I no longer have to." His hand travelled to her bottom and after a little while, his lips trailed down to kiss her neck. By now, he knew the effect that had on her.

But there was a reason why they never really made out here, and they were reminded again when they heard a noise at the door.

Ennaly could just make out a mischievous grin before a spark of magic betrayed Solas Fade-stepping away, dropping her down to the sofa while he appeared on the platform above her bed, next to his painting supplies.

Focus on your surroundings, her Keeper always said, and right now, Ennaly used her magic training to settle her breath and make her flushed cheeks pale again. Straightening her tunic, she emerged from the sofa just in time to see Josephine appearing at the top of the stairs, panting under the strain of a large stack of books and papers.

Ennaly hurried over and took some to alleviate the weight on the ambassador.

"Thank you, Inquisitor," she said gratefully. "My apologies, I couldn't knock with carrying all of this."

"No worries, Josephine," Ennaly said as they placed the books on the desk.

"Good afternoon, ambassador," Solas said in his soft voice.

Clearly startled, Josephine turned around. "Good - good afternoon, Solas." She seemed to have difficulty in finding a word to address him, since he had no title to use.

"I have requested Solas to paint a mural to brighten up my quarters," Ennaly explained. "I thought there was a lack of trees around here."

"It is quite beautiful," Josephine said, looking up at the half-finished work.

"Thank you, ambassador," Solas replied.

"I have a father and sister who paint. The style might be different, but I wish my sister was able to finish something like this." Josephine sighed and turned towards Ennaly. "I brought some new reports to read. And we have the conclusions on the nobles, the information you requested..."

She trailed off, clearly uncertain how she should continue. Ennaly saw her glance up to Solas, and she understood why. Suddenly, Josephine was outnumbered by Elves, with information on what other Humans would think of them, with most of those ideas none too positive. Ennaly felt pity for the ambassador. She was young, younger than the others, younger than she was, and she did so much, always putting others first.

"Thank you," Ennaly said compassionately. She turned to Solas. "I want to know what opinion the Orlesian nobles hold of Elves, before I have to face them and find out myself during the ball."

Solas looked down at the two of them, pensive but displeased, his paintbrush stopped in mid-air.

"Yes," Josephine said, a little disheartened. "I am sorry for the strain this puts on you. Both of you."

Ennaly looked up towards Solas. They had never really discussed the conversation she had with Leliana and Josephine. It was a bit awkward to discuss how your feminine wiles could help sway some nobles, indulge in their perverted fantasies, with your... What was Solas, really? Her lover?

"I am not worried," Solas replied. "All I have to do is stand aside and observe. Will you be alright, Ennaly?"

He used her name, not her title, so she knew this was a personal question. She wondered if Josephine would understand the glances they exchanged.

"I can prance around on a dancefloor well enough, as you know," she said. "I think all my lessons have had their influence, too. If I know whom best to avoid, I'll be fine."

It would take them two full days on horseback to reach Halamshiral. The group was quite large, Ennaly and the five of her usual travel companions, the three advisors, and a group of soldiers and attendants. They spent their night on the road at an inn, where Ennaly shared a room with Cassandra.

They would arrive the night before the ball at the Halamshiral estate of Comtesse Helene, where they were invited to stay two nights. The estate was situated in the High Quarter, which was surrounded by the Elven slums. The slums were burned down by the current Empress, only a year earlier, to try and quell the Elven rebellion.

Nothing quite prepared Ennaly for having to travel through it. A lot was burned down, the rubble long since cleared away or reused, leaving desolation in its place. New structures erupted in places, mostly grouped together. She saw figures huddling together in silence as they passed on their horses.

It must have been terrifying for the city Elves to see all these richly dressed people passing by. With the ball tomorrow, there was quite a lot of traffic going up to the High Quarter. Ennaly never seen Elves dressed as poorly as these, living like they were.

They had likely never seen a Dalish Elf before, tattooed as she was. What did they think of her? Traitors, like Anarel regarded her, for having such a Human title as Herald of Andraste, and being in mostly Human company? Or would they think of her as a Herald of change?

They turned a corner, showing more of the same poverty. A young Elven girl ran around, jumping up and down in play, before the group approached. The girl froze. A man wearing a dirty apron ran towards the child, taking her by the shoulders and pressing her close.

"It's an Elf, papa," she heard the girl say, pointing at her. "Is she Deelish? Her face has lines. I want lines too, papa!"

"It's Dalish. And hush, sweetie," the father said. The little girl looked up at her with brazen admiration, like she was some sort of fabled hero arrived in the flesh. Worst of all, she looked at her with hope.

Ennaly's gaze crossed the father. He looked at her oddly, with some of the admiration his daughter seemed to hold, but mingled with fear. The longer he looked at her, the more it turned into a frown.

Only when it rolled down, did Ennaly notice the large tear on her face. She felt ill and averted her eyes. Trying to hide it from everybody else, she wiped her tears on her sleeve. Cullen, riding next to her, seemed to notice and she could see the sympathy on his face. Not wanting pity, she faced away.

Where once the Elves were granted a new beginning, a new home, they were crushed time and time again. Ennaly was one of the lucky ones, being born in freedom, even if her heritage bore the name of this place. The Dales, a promise lost.

Crossing the large gates to the High Quarter didn't improve her mood. The stark contrast between the districts was too much. Ennaly wasn't the only one affected by what they witnessed. Focussing on her breath, she quietly rode her horse until they arrived at their destination.

Having dismounted her horse, she quietly slipped into a dark quiet corner of the stable, where saddles and bridles were kept. It smelled like leather, polish, and metal. She knew in a few minutes, she had to greet this Comtesse and act all polite. Trying to calm herself, she wiped away the new tears and focussed on her breathing.

When she opened her eyes again, Solas appeared at her side.

"Gods, the injustice," she muttered, glad to see him. "That was possibly the most terrible thing I have ever witnessed. That little girl, that was heartbreaking, did you see her? She looked at me with hope, like I was some sort of saviour."

"I agree, it was quite terrible," Solas said softly, reaching out to wipe away a stray tear.

She wanted him to hold her, but they weren't alone. Any moment someone could walk in, so she maintained her distance. If someone saw them now, they would understand they were just two Elves discussing whatever they had just witnessed.

"I think it affected everybody," she said. "We were all so quiet."

"Not to the same level as it affects you," Solas replied, his hand still on her cheek. "To see your people –"

"Our people. You're an Elf too, Solas."

Some kind of intensity passed over him as he straightened up, stroking her hair before he pulled his hand away. "No matter whose people they are, it remains an injustice. To see them left to their fate while the Human nobles lounge in gilded houses like these, food to spare..."

She stared at him. He was serious, she saw, it did affect him. Defeated, she sighed. "It could have been us, given a slightly different fate. I knew what happened here, but to see it like that... I have never seen anyone living like that..."

"I know, nobody should have to endure this."

And suddenly, she no longer cared if somebody would see them. She leaned closer and let her head rest on Solas' chest. "I don't want to be alone tonight," she whispered, her eyes closed. "I'm sure they're going to give me some fancy big room, but I can't bear to be alone. Please, if you can join somehow..."

"You do not want others to know."

She glanced up. "I do not. That just makes it harder, don't you see? This ball is going to be hard enough already."

Solas leaned over to her to kiss her forehead. "So, you want me to sneak around at night, without being seen, to spend the night at the Inquisitor's side, and presumably leave in the morning before anyone notices where I was?"

Ennaly stared at him. "Well, not if you say it like that."

But mischief mixed in his serious expression. "No, I think this place can use a bit of successful Elven rebellion, wouldn't you say?"

Smiling, she kissed him. He seemed to want to lean in closer, but she parted. It was just in time as Leliana turned the corner.

"Inquisitor," she said with a little bow of her head. She looked up, and Ennaly could swear she looked gleeful from her to Solas. "And Solas. I am sorry for what we just had to witness. Please take a few moments, but I would urge you not to take too long. The Comtesse is ready to receive us."

Of course, as she expected, Leliana knew exactly what was going on.