A/n: Chapter title from Defying Gravity (Wicked).
Chapter Twenty-three:
Too Late To Go Back Sleep.
Sleep coming instantly would have been a Godsend, but she already knew God probably didn't approve of her tonight so Quinn wasn't surprised to find herself still awake over two hours later.
She lay in bed with the comforter pulled over her head, confused and scared and but aching with arousal. How could she do that? Why would she do that? What the hell had possessed her to make her do that? Over and over she asked herself the questions but no answers were forthcoming.
Quinn scrunched her eyes shut. Why, why, why?
Perhaps because it had felt amazing. Every step from deciding to tease Rachel to actually pleasing her had felt amazing. Even now, mortified as she was, her entire body still tingled with the memory. It had been completely one sided, how much better would it feel if Rachel reciprocated . . .?
No! That was never going to happen. Too complicated. Too much drama . . . even for Rachel Berry apparently. Quinn didn't know whether to laugh or sob at that but with the sound of footsteps approaching along the landing she bit down on her bottom lip to avoid inadvertently doing either. She didn't want someone to hear that she was still awake in case they came to check how she was feeling. Especially not Rachel, who would no doubt be listening harder than anyone else as she passed the bedroom door.
She heard Santana say that she and Brittany were taking Frannie's old room next door and give directions to her parents' bedroom on the next level. Afterwards they either all moved further along the landing or dropped their voices out of respect for the sleeping but Quinn could hear no more than the occasional word or two in the soft murmur of conversation. In the dark she held her breath to minimise noise pollution and strained her ears for any sound of Rachel's clear distinct voice rising above the rest. She waited ten minutes for it according to the time on her phone and then Mercedes and Tina were calling out "Goodnight" without a sound or a mention of Rachel.
Had they left her downstairs alone?
That had her fuming. She didn't expect anything less from Santana and Brittany, but the fact that Mercedes and Tina hadn't asked her to join them when her parent's king sized bed was more than big enough for three was unnecessarily rude. Quinn looked guiltily at the acre of empty space available in her modest double . . . but no, that was completely different. There was no way she could ask Rachel to stay the night in with her and hope to keep what little shred of sanity she had left about them.
She tossed and turned for another twenty minutes before she got up and crept down to the living room. Rachel was curled up on the couch with only the blanket they'd shared earlier covering her. Even from the doorway Quinn could see her shivering in her sleep. It was November after all and now the fire had gone out her living room wasn't the cosiest of places.
Without thinking too much about it she went back up to her room and grabbed her comforter. When she came back down she stood with it in her arms for a moment, enjoying the warmth herself, while she watched Rachel sleep. She was picking her moment, she didn't want to wake the girl up accidentally because then they'd have to talk. It took five minutes of watching her sleep soundly before she was sure that she wouldn't disturb her and then very gently, she placed the comforter over her. Quinn took a second to make sure it was tucked securely around her shoulders before going back up to her room.
The first time she'd heard someone come into the room it had been hard enough to keep still and quiet, but Rachel had assumed then that it was one of the other girls coming back down for a glass of water or something they had forgotten and she didn't really want to speak to any of them.
She wasn't particularly upset that they'd left her out of their sleeping arrangements, or actually she was, but it hadn't been a surprise and she had more interesting things to be thinking about anyway and, really, it was probably best to not be thinking about those things… in a bed ... with two other girls. So while their neglect had hurt a little, she could see it as a good thing because her mind just wouldn't leave thoughts of Quinn Fabray alone! How could it be expected to after . . . after . . . that! Just thinking about it made her want to fall apart in the best way all over again. She was still actually in shock, she was sure of it, because there could be no other reason why sleep absolutely refused to come to her. She was certainly physically spent enough to need sleep but her mind wouldn't stop racing.
Why had she done it? Why did Quinn Fabray have foot-sex with her? She hadn't even known that was possible. In fact she hadn't even known it was possible to feel that good at all. She wasn't naïve, despite what people thought, her Dads had sat her down for the birds and bee's talk at eleven years old, she knew how the mechanics of it worked, but they hadn't told her about lesbian mechanics – which was short sighted of them really – and they certainly hadn't taught her to be ready for Quinn Fabray!
Hearing someone enter the room again she kept herself still and pretended to be asleep. She really wasn't in the mood to hold a conversation. She heard soft footsteps approach the couch and nearly screamed when she felt something warm and heavy blanket her. Thankfully she realised what it was before she did. She kept her eyes closed and her breathing even as she felt Quinn tuck the comforter around her shoulders. She thought about opening her eyes but knew it would be far more than either of them could deal with at the moment.
Quinn left and Rachel breathed out in relief, tugged the comforter up to her chin and fell asleep almost right away.
Rachel awoke early the next morning; her body conditioned to rise by six even if she was a mile away from her alarm clock. She lay staring at the high ceiling, the couch wasn't as comfortable as it had been the night before but with Quinn's comforter pulled up to her chin she felt nice and cosy. Sleepily, she ran through memories of the previous evening. It was her first slumber party and while she had been left to sleep downstairs alone that didn't retract from the overall experience and she wanted to make sure she had everything in its proper order.
It took maybe a minute before one particular memory broke ranks and the night's main event rushed back into her mind, filling up every available pocket of space and apparently stealing all of her oxygen because suddenly she couldn't breathe properly.
She sat up clutching the edges of the couch cushion beneath her, the sound of her gasp harsh in the quiet room. Oh no! What had she done? She lay back down just as quickly, pulling the cover over her face so that she could hide in the dark. Her heart was pounding almost as hard as it had been the night before and while she knew, in some general sense, that stuff had happened afterwards, worse stuff that she had definitely not instigated, all Rachel could focus on was how her impulsive and embarrassing reaction to Quinn innocently tapping her foot to music was the catalyst for everything that had happened after. This would be all her fault and she would pay for it in one way or another because there was just no way Quinn was going to accept blame for something like this. She probably wouldn't even accept it had taken place at all.
That left Rachel with a dilemma, because what had transpired on this very couch between them the night before had been possibly the most amazing experience of her life, certainly the most intensely charged one. And the idea that Quinn might just deny it had even happened . . . well, Rachel just couldn't allow it.
At once she stood, abandoning the more appealing idea of scuttling out of the house before anyone else woke up and started to fold the comforter into an easy square for carrying. If she was going to talk about this it had to be while it was still fresh in her mind because if she waited until Monday morning at school not only would she drive herself insane but it would give Quinn time to come up with a million excuses and deflections.
There were five closed doors leading off the upstairs landing and she was thankful that she had been to Quinn's room the night before. At least she wouldn't accidentally wake Santana up.
She knocked lightly on Quinn's door and waited. After a second firmer knock with still no response, she opened the door slowly and stepped just inside. Quinn was stretched out on her bed, half on her tummy, facing away from her and still fast asleep. There was only a thin yellow sheet on the bed and the cheerleader must have been cold at some point in the night because she'd draped a fluffy white terry-towel robe over her too. Most of it had slipped to the side now, leaving just one arm over shoulders as if the empty robe was spooning her. Rachel's breath caught, first at the beauty of the sleeping girl and then when she realised Quinn had left herself cold so that Rachel would be warm. It was by far the nicest thing the girl had ever done for her and it made her even more determined to clear the air before any nastiness could set in.
"Quinn."
The girl on the bed mumbled something about five more minutes and threw an arm over the side of her head.
"Quinn," she tried a little louder.
That got a reaction! Quinn startled awake and rolled over onto one elbow. Pulling the sheet protectively to her chest she glared blearily at her.
"What are you doing in my bedroom, Berry!" her voice was rough with sleep. "Get out. You can't just barge in like this."
"I did knock but you didn't hear me."
"So you thought you'd sneak the opportunity to perve on me in my sleep?"
"Of course not." Rachel frowned and thought about mentioning how Quinn had watched her sleep the night before but that would mean admitting she'd been awake at the time. "I just wanted to return this." She held the comforter up. "And to say thank you for letting me borrow it."
Quinn glanced at her alarm clock and with a groan let her head fall back to her pillow. "You couldn't wait for a reasonable hour to give it to me? It is Saturday morning."
"No, it couldn't wait." The way she said it made Quinn groan again, obviously guessing there was an ulterior motive and Rachel decided this was her best opening. "I think we . . . we should talk about, uh, last . . . last night."
"I don't think we need to do that."
"Well perhaps you don't, but I do, so . . ."
"Fine!" Quinn pulled the sheet over her head. "But if you're going to yell at me for violating you could you at least close the door first, and, you know, do it without any yelling."
That surprised her, because while what had happened had been a shock Rachel certainly hadn't minded it. She'd kind of loved it in fact, a lot. She'd been ready for Quinn to start yelling at her for not stopping it. She certainly hadn't been ready for an admission of guilt.
It made her take a few steps deeper into the room and, she couldn't help it, giggle. The sheet came down and now Quinn's glare was at full force.
"I'm sorry," she said quickly. "It's not funny, I'm just nervous."
"Good."
"And I don't want to yell and I don't feel violated, well maybe in a good way." The corner of Quinn's lips twitched up but she didn't stop glaring so Rachel hurried on. "I just thought we should talk about it, because if we pretend it never happened then it will fester and it'll become this huge thing we never talk about but it will always be there and . . ."
"Or we could just never speak to each other about anything ever again and then it won't be an issue."
"I don't want to do that and I don't think it would make for a very healthy atmosphere in Glee club – which should be our primary concern with Sectionals just a month away. Besides, I thought we were becoming friends and your solution would definitely put a dampener on that."
"We're not becoming friends," Quinn said quietly.
"Oh," Rachel's voice was even quieter. "But you invited me to your sleepover. I thought that meant . . ."
"It means you did really nice thing for for me yesterday. With the cupcakes. And I wanted to say thank you. And make sure you were okay. I was being a good person not declaring a friendship."
"Oh," she said again. "Well, you're welcome. And, " Rachel blushed and grinned, "you succeeded; I feel very well thanked after last night."
"Oh God!" Quinn pushed her head under her pillow but Rachel heard her embarrassed chuckle anyway.
"And really, we don't have to talk about it," she went on. "I just wanted to let you know that if last night was a one time thing, well I respect that. You know I'm having my reservations about our break-up but if you feel touching me like that was a mistake. . ."
Quinn's head shot back out from beneath the pillow. "Seriously, Rachel, shut the freaking door!"
"Sorry!" She pushed the door softly until it clicked shut. When she turned back she'd lost her train of thought. "Um . . ."
Quinn seemed to relax now that their privacy was more or less absolute. "You think it was a mistake?"
"You don't?" she asked nervously. "I assumed it was an unplanned moment of madness on your part."
"Well I certainly didn't plan it. I just . . ." Quinn looked down at the bed. "I don't know what happened. I think you may have been a little too enthusiastic with your tongue in the pantry and it stabbed into my brain, you know, like the number one danger of cue tips."
Quinn sounded so embarrassed as she picked at a wrinkle in her sheet and yet so serious in her quest for an explanation that Rachel burst out with a peal of laughter.
She clapped a hand over her mouth immediately and giggle-mumbled, "Sorry! Still nervous. I think we should talk about it, it's the best way to put it behind us and then, if you wish, we can pretend it never happened."
Slowly Quinn met her eyes again. "Okay. So can the talking about it part be done now?"
Rachel's face fell. She didn't know why, it wasn't like the event really needed dissecting but it was a very special, if stupid, moment between them and she liked the idea of dwelling on it for a while, more than that she wanted Quinn to want to dwell on it too. "I guess."
Quinn sighed, not unkindly. "What else is there to say?"
"I don't know."
"Look, it was just a moment of insanity – we both got carried away, we both had a good time, let's just . . ." Quinn's eyes went wide, probably at the same time as Rachel's, as her brain caught up with her words. She looked like she wanted to take them back, but she didn't, she didn't say anything else in fact, just continued to stare at her, looking halfway between scared and pissed off.
Rachel bit her tongue for as long as she could but then words rushed out anyway. "Did you like it too?"
"No! It shouldn't have happened and it can never happen again."
The words were still rushing, "I'm sorry, of course you didn't. I just . . I mean it felt amazing, on my end, but I understand you probably have bruises on your knees from all the praying it . . ." She went rigid and slowly looked over her shoulder. Jesus wasn't as imposing as he had been the night before but he was still a very powerful presence overlooking the bed. "Is it even okay for you to talk about this in front of him?"
Quinn's eyes rolled. "If I say no will it stop you?"
"Of course, I fully respect your beliefs."
"You want to talk about my beliefs? Okay. How about the fact that I have a boyfriend and I don't even do that kind of thing with him." Her head fell back to her pillow and she laughed lightly as she covered her eyes with her hand. " Or let's talk about how I'm supposed to be going to the Chastity Ballwith my father in two weeks where I should be renewing my vows and standing up to say: "Hey, look what a pure and virtuous young lady I am. I certainly don't get my jollies from having a girl's tongue in my ear and my hand under her jumper and my foot up her skirt!' Oh God, If he ever found out . . ."
"Were you just trying to do an English accent," she asked quickly, trying for levity, desperate to pull Quinn back from what seemed to be the brink of tears.
It worked. "No. That sounded nothing like an English accent."
"I agree; that's why I look so horrified by it." She took a step closer to the bed. "And forgive me for saying, but doesn't the fact that you're pregnant make going to a Chastity Ball hypocritical anyway?"
"Obviously, but my Dad doesn't know that I am and I can't not go because then he'll need to know why I can't go."
"You could always tell him."
Quinn scoffed, "I don't think so."
A not particularly comfortable silence fell over them and Rachel ducked her head. They'd talked enough about it, she guessed, but she wasn't ready to leave yet. She just didn't want to. She wanted to make the most of this one-on-one time with Quinn.
A couple of minutes passed, the anxiety of the moment and everything she wanted from it crawling over her and eventually she looked up again, deeming it time to make her departure.
The first thing she noticed was that Quinn was still watching her; the second thing she noticed was that Quinn was shivering under the thin sheet.
"You should . . ." she began, stepping closer to the bed.
Quinn tensed up, rolling back a little. "What are you doing?"
"I was just going to put this over you," she said as she shook out the comforter. "You really shouldn't have let me have it if it was going to make you cold."
"I wasn't cold until after I gave it to you." Quinn allowed Rachel to drape it over her body and then pushed the puffy edge down so that she could still look up at her.
Rachel stayed standing at the edge of the bed. "Why didn't you get another?"
"Spare blankets are in the room Santana and Brittany are in."
"So? I'm sure they wouldn't have minded being woken up for a minute if you'd explained you were cold."
"I didn't want them to know."
Rachel nodded. "So, I guess we've talked. Monday at school?"
"Will be exactly the same as it always is."
"Oh, I just meant that I'll see you Monday at school, but now that you mention it . . . Does what happened change anything for us in private?"
"I just told you it didn't."
"I'm not talking about whether or not I'm going to get, um, the foot-sex again . . ."
Quinn scrunched her eyes shut, face going red, but she was sort of grinning as she hissed, "Rachel!"
"I don't know what else to call it!"
"Neither do I, so can we not call it anything?"
"Okay, but . . . we had a moment, ill-fated maybe but . . . doesn't that mean anything to you?"
"What are you asking?"
"I'm asking if you think we can find a safe way to use the obvious chemistry between us or if you're really happy letting it all go to waste."
Quinn looked horrified by the question. "I'm really hoping right now that you're talking about an actual science experiment or us singing together because if you're seriously suggesting implementing some kind of friends-with-benefits deal at 6:30 on a Saturday morning. . ."
"No! How could you think I'd ask that of you? Although I suppose that is actually kind of what I'm asking . . ."
"Rachel!"
"Hear me out. I'm not suggesting we should be Friends-with-the-benefit-of-sexual-intercourse. I'm suggesting we should be Friends-with-the-benefit-of-a-supportive-ear-and-a-vast-and-growing-theoretical-knowledge-of-antenatal-dos-and-don'ts."
"Seriously it's 6:30."
"I know. Do you have anything more intelligent to say to my idea than Speaking Clock announcements. Which are not only unproductive, by the way, but also incorrect because it's 6:36."
"Yeah, how about . . ." Quinn pushed up on her elbows. "We're not friends! Might make it kinda hard for either of us to get any benefits out of it."
"We could be."
Quinn smiled but was quiet long enough that Rachel's feet started to fidget beside the bed. "Okay. Tell me how we be just friends when things like last night keep happening?"
Rachel shrugged, "I suggest we both just have to try harder to not let our feelings get the better of us."
"Do you think you can do that? Considering how strong you've been coming on all week?"
Oh right, Rachel should have expected this to come up, but how did she tell Quinn that her intense attention of the past week hadn't been spontaneously inspired by Quinn herself, but designed to eke as much reaction out of a flustered Quinn as Rachel could.
She couldn't, so instead she coyly asked, "Did you really hate it that much?"
Quinn turned her head into her pillow for a moment before tilting her head to look at her with one eye. "I don't hate it at all. I just don't know how to handle that type of . . . thing with you."
The photo of Quinn and Finn mocked her from the bookshelf. Why did he get to have that type of thing with her when it was all a lie and yet she didn't?
Oh, right, the baby. The one that she would never be a part of no matter how many cribs, mobiles and diaper cans she priced up; just like Quinn would never be hers. The thought was instantly devastating and she couldn't take it. She didn't care if their dating days were already behind them because the bond that had been steadily growing between them went deeper than kissing and touching and . . . and foot-sex They weren't good for each other in a romantic way but there were other relationship options – Facebook had a whole list of them! It was just a case of finding the one that was right for them and Rachel was pretty sure she already knew what it was.
"Please be my friend, Quinn!"
The blonde was still half-buried beneath a pillow laughed and asked a muffled, "What?"
"I know I can be a good friend if you just give me the chance. Be my friend, please."
After some more laughter, Quinn just studied her for a while. A long while, long enough that Rachel was starting to think she hadn't heard. Until she said:
"Okay."
"Even with the foot-sex aside . . ." Rachel began, beaming from ear to ear.
"Rachel!"
". . . you're the closest friend I've ever had."
"Jeez, it's been two seconds and don't you mean I'm the only friend you've ever had."
Rachel knew that she looked upset by the way Quinn was suddenly contrite, but she rallied with, "Maybe, but at least I went straight to the top of the pyramid."
Quinn laughed again and it went all the way to her eyes. "True. You must be something special."
"I like to think so." Rachel sat on the edge of the bed and Quinn shifted over to give her some room. "So now that we're friends, do I get special privileges?"
"Like what?"
"I don't know. Can I speak to you in school?"
"Sure"
"Can I sit with you at lunch?"
"No."
Quinn's tone was light-hearted enough but Rachel frowned anyway, knowing she was serious.
"What about in class?"
"We already sit next to each other in American Lit."
"But we have other classes together."
"If there's a space next to me, sure."
Rachel sighed, there was never a space next to her. "What about Glee club?"
"I don't think so." Now Rachel huffed, but Quinn hadn't finished. "Not yet anyway. Let's find out if this friend thing even works for us before we go public. Especially around that bunch of gossip vultures."
"Okay, fine, so what level of friendship are we at now?"
Quinn cocked an eyebrow. "You're asking how far we've progressed in the few minutes since I actually agreed we could be friends?"
Rachel grinned, "Yes."
"I don't know." Quinn laughed again but then quieted like there was suddenly something on her mind. "I will be honest with you though. I haven't had a close friend in a while either. It seems like ever since we started high school Santana and I have been in competition and where Santana goes Brittany is already there waiting for her, which, considering they're my best friends, kind of sucks. We're not as close as we used to be and I miss that."
Rachel looked at Quinn's bookshelves, summoning courage. "Um, does that mean you have a best friend vacancy open?"
Quinn laughed again, "I suppose it does, but don't get ahead of yourself."
She smiled slightly, "But there's a chance? Any tips on what I can do to sway you in my direction?"
"Yeah, stop trying so hard, because it wouldn't take that much for me to get sick of you."
Her answer was playful and Rachel felt confident in ignoring the insult. She smiled into space for a moment before taking a chance and laying down across the bed. Her head came to rest on Quinn's stomach. The other girl tensed but didn't move away.
"What are you doing?"
"Well, as we seem to be on a fast track to being best friends I thought I'd help us along by doing a best friend thing with you."
"And you think best friends use each other as pillows all the time?" Quinn sounded amused.
"Brittany and Santana did last night and I've never seen two friends closer than them."
"You do realise that they're more than just good friends, right?"
No she hadn't realised that! She turned her head until she could just see Quinn through her eyelashes. "Really?"
"For as long as I've known them."
"Oh." She giggled. "I bet this is making you really uncomfortable then."
"Yes, but mostly because I'm scared you're squashing my baby." With a hand on the side of Rachel's face, Quinn shifted her head up until it was resting on her sternum. "That's better."
"Okay." She tried to ignore the way her right cheek was now touching the underside of Quinn's breast and groped with her right hand until she found Quinn's. She touched their fingertips gently together, half-expecting the contact to be snatched away. "This still seems perfectly friendly."
"It does." Quinn entwined their fingers, her palm against the back of Rachel's hand, making Rachel smile and think that this friend thing was going to be harder than she wanted it to be.
After some silence, she reluctantly said, "I should probably go soon."
"I think everyone else was planning on hanging out for the day."
"I don't think I could handle that."
"Why not?"
"Because last night is still pretty fresh in my memory and I'd feel uncomfortable talking to the others."
"I thought we agreed to put it behind us."
"We did but . . ."
"But?"
"I'm scared that when I look at you I'll give something away and I don't want to put you in that position."
Quinn took a while to answer, when she did it was accompanied by a hand combing gently through Rachel's hair. "Okay. Thank you."
The hand continued to tease through her hair, fingertips brushing close to her temple, and Rachel closed her eyes and enjoyed it.
"That feels really nice," she murmured and then wondered if she should have kept it to herself.
The hand didn't instantly retract and the smooth motion continued, reminding her of their first official date, sitting in the back of Quinn's car with those fingers stroking up and down her neck and across her collarbone.
"Mmm," Quinn replied sleepily and then after a few moments Rachel heard and felt her groan.
Alert again she raised her head, eyes still on the ceiling as she worriedly asked, "What's wrong? Am I squashing something after all?"
"No, but something just hit me."
"What?"
"This is the only time you'll ever be in my bedroom and we just made a friends pact to never let our other feelings get the better of us. Which means now we'll never get the chance to," she dropped her voice to a conspirational whisper, ". . . misbehave on my nice big bed."
Rachel surprised herself with how fast she moved from laying horizontally across the bed on her back to vertically beside Quinn on her elbow. "I won't tell on us if you don't," she promised, breathless with anticipation, which faltered slightly when Quinn laughed harder than ever. "What?"
"That was a test, little Gnome, and you just completely flunked it."
"Oh . . . fudge." She groaned and buried her face in Quinn's pillow. She was amused to; and annoyed at being so weak."That was unfair. I demand a make up test. I wasn't prepared."
"It's okay, I don't think I'm going to pass either."
Rachel turned her face to the side to question what that meant and was met by the softest, sweetest answer she could have hoped for. Smiling against Quinn's lips she offered a kiss of her own and received another as she shifted more on to her side. The movement was awkward as she refused to break the delicate contact between them and Quinn didn't seem inclined to either. In fact, pushing the comforter down, she draped her arm over Rachel to play with her hair some more.
"What does this mean?" she asked when eventually Quinn dropped her head back to the pillow and just looked at her.
"Why does it have to mean anything?"
"Well . . ."
Quinn exerted a little pressure on the back of her neck, drawing her down and stealing the breath she needed to ask questions and the sensibility to come to any conclusions herself.
She slipped an arm around Quinn's back, using it as leverage as she wriggled closer and wished the bed covers weren't still tangled around their owner. It would be so nice to be able to feel the full length of the bodies together. She wasn't feeling particularly sexy or anything and from the way their kisses were staying simple and warm and sweet she assumed Quinn wasn't either, but she wanted to lay there and kiss her like this forever . . . or until they had to go back to school on Monday morning anyway.
That fantasy went down the drain with a toilet flush.
"Shit! That was the main bathroom. I know the gurgle and besides Frannie's room and the spare don't have en-suites." Quinn's beautiful hazel eyes were filled with panic. "Someone's up!"
"It's still early. They might go straight back to bed."
"And they might not! If its Santana or Brittany they could just walk in without knocking!"
Quinn was so scared that she hadn't even pushed her away yet and it made Rachel feel benevolent. She rolled her eyes. "And they say life isn't a dress rehearsal."
"What?"
"What did you say when you first woke up and saw me?"
"I don't know! I don't remember!"
"Yes you do. Think."
"I told you to get out?" Quinn guessed in a whisper.
"Almost, but you'll need to speak up and embellish it a little and, just so that you know, I'm going to kiss you between each sentence to make myself feel better."
"I don't understand."
"Quinn, sweetheart, stop acting like a chipmunk in headlights and start acting like I'm an unwelcome intruder in your room."
Quinn beat her to the first 'feel better' kiss but due to her panic she mostly just bounced off of Rachel's lips before bringing up a hand to cover her ear – which confused Rachel until the shouting started.
"What are you doing? How long have you been in my room, Manhands?"
Rachel tilted her face to the door and elevated her voice enough to be quiet but clear on the other side of it. "Just a few minutes. I did knock, Quinn, but you didn't hear me and I thought it wise to cease before I woke the rest of the house at such an early hour."
"So you figured you'd just stand there and perve on me while I was sleeping?"
Rachel planted a kiss on her, grinning slightly, before saying, "Of course not. I would never violate your privacy in such a manner."
"Then why are you violating it at all? Why are you in here?"
She kissed her again and dropped her voice to a whisper only Quinn would hear. "I wanted to thank you for all the foot-sex, remember?"
"Rachel," Quinn hissed, but the fear in her eyes was being overcome by mirth. Louder, she demanded, "Well, She-Man, answer me?"
"She-Man?" she mouthed, "Unnecessary!" and pointed to her lips.
Smirking, Quinn indulged her, and forgot to stop indulging her until feet could be heard gathering on the landing. Gripped by her upper arms, Rachel was propelled backwards and the panic was back tenfold. "It's not going to work!"
"Yes it is. This is perfect!" It was so tempting to swoop back in for one more kiss but no, the show had to come first. Already more or less pushed up onto her knees by Quinn, she wobbled back on them until she could hop off of the bed. "I only wanted to borrow the phone, Quinn! I didn't realise it would be such a problem." She said loudly, before gesturing at Quinn to say whatever line she came up with.
"You didn't think coming into my bedroom while I was sleeping would be a problem?
Quinn was waiting for her to shout back, but Rachel needed a minute and so she waved her hand and muttered, "Keep going!"
Frowning Quinn disentangled her body from the bedclothes so that she could get up. "That would be a problem even if you didn't have a giant lesbian crush on me. The fact that you do . . . God, I've tried to just let it go but you're impossible! How do I know you didn't sneak in here to try and kiss me again?"
There were voices outside the door now – four of them, everyone was up thanks to their fake shouting match. Rachel could hear them whispering about whether or not they should barge in and help Quinn out or wait to hear what happened next. It didn't matter what they ultimately decided though because Rachel had found that place inside of herself and she was ready.
One, two, three . . . she burst into tears. "I'm sorry. I didn't think. I swear I didn't mean any harm, Quinn!"
Already stalking closer, Quinn suddenly rushed to where she was standing and held her shoulders comfortingly, "Why are you . . .? Don't cry, Rachel, please."
She rolled her tearful eyes and quietly snapped back, "Stay in character!"
"Huh?"
Unable to help herself, Rachel snatched one last kiss before whirling away and pulling the door open. She acted surprised to find the others right outside and then placed a hand over her face and ran for the stairs, wailing "I'm sorry!" one more time before descending.
She slowed halfway down because the tears in her eyes might have been fake but that didn't stop them from blurring her vision and she'd do a lot for Quinn but breaking her neck wasn't on the list and so she heard the first part of the conversation behind her.
"Everything okay, Q?" Santana didn't sound like she cared any more than usual.
"I don't really know," Quinn sounded perfectly genuine.
"Knew inviting her here was a mistake. I'm going back to bed. Coming Britt?"
"Santana, someone has to take her home!"
"Not gonna be me."
She could hear Quinn conversing with Mercedes and Tina as she left the stairs and then she shut herself into the downstairs bathroom to wash the tears from her face.
She was more confused than ever by what had just transpired. Not their play-acting, that had been faultless. Well she had been anyway, Quinn possibly needed a few lessons on improvisation, but before that . . . Quinn had finally agreed to give a friendship between them a real go, which was great – or at least a very close second to great – but then she'd kissed her again. And said it didn't mean anything. And what did that mean?
She dressed quickly in the clothes she had been wearing the day before and then wondered what to do with what she'd been wearing for the past twelve hours. The bikini she shoved into her bag without much thought but the nightshirt . . . she didn't want Quinn to think she was stealing her clothes but she really wanted to keep the nightshirt.
In the end she folded it neatly and decided if she saw anyone on the way to the front door she'd leave it behind. If she didn't she would keep it for a day or two under the pretence of washing it – Quinn wouldn't complain about that.
As it turned out, the only person she saw on the way to the front door was Quinn, waiting by the front door.
"San and Britt are back in bed, Mercedes is taking a shower and Tina is in my room checking her email," Quinn whispered as soon as she caught sight of her.
"They left you alone to deal with me?" Rachel was aghast at their callous disregard for Quinn's welfare.
"They all think I can handle you."
"You can."
Quinn shook her head with a wry smile, "I really can't. Anyway, I'll give you a ride home."
"And waste my stellar performance? I don't think so. You will order me out of your house, right now."
"Rachel, I'm not gonna make you walk."
"I've missed my usual work out this morning, the walk will do me good. Especially considering I ate my weight in cupcakes yesterday."
"It's really early."
She looked out of the frosted glass panel beside the door. "The sun's almost up and it's Saturday morning. I'll be surrounded by joggers and dog walkers as soon as I get to the end of your road. I'll be perfectly safe."
"Rachel."
She'd already been speaking quietly but now she dropped her voice to a murmur. "Tell me you want to give me a ride home so that you can kiss me again and I'll accept."
"I do. I can't. I won't. Friends, we agreed that's all that's on the table for now."
She had a million "But what about . . .?" questions but for once she quashed them. "I accept what's on the table, but I am walking home. Now, I'm taking your bikini to wash because, well, it really needs washing."
"Why, what did you . . .?" Rachel's blush was apparently enough because Quinn blushed too and cut her eyes to the side. "Don't answer, I get it."
She grinned, "I was going to take your nightshirt home to wash too, because I wore that all night too."
"No, that's okay." Quinn snatched it from her hand. "I can wash it."
Perplexed by her sudden enthusiasm for laundry, Rachel just nodded. "Thank you for last night . . . oh, I don't just mean . . . I mean . . . well, all of it, thank you."
Quinn was blushing and smiling again as she opened the front door. "You're welcome." Rachel stepped out but turned back as the blonde cleared her throat. "I'll, um . . . I may, possibly, be on Facebook after your vocal lesson later."
"What a coincidence, I may be too." Rachel gave her a subtle wink (which totally wasn't and she knew it, she'd never learned the art of winking, or subtlety) and then left Quinn watching her walk down the driveway.