TFP: Youngling
Ch.27~ New Normal
I held her close as she slept, it had been a rough evening, she had cried for a while. I didn't want to let her go… I could have lost her today… I should have been stricter with her I should have kept her back from learning such things! She should have never set on pede outside of this base! Primus thank you for keeping her safe today…
I felt a servo on my shoulderplate I spun to see Optimus looking at me he had a soft expression. He reached up and cupped my cheekplate brushing his thumb under my optics. I must be crying… I leaned into his touch as he cupped my other cheekplate. He leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on my forehelm.
"It's alright she's here and she is safe." He soothed; I felt my optics well up.
"I shouldn't have let her set one pede out of this base," I stated, he hushed me our bond filled with love.
"It's alright now…" he hushed; I felt a tear slip down my cheekplate.
"I'm scared, Orion," I admitted, he pulled me into an embrace of our sleeping charge in my arms. "She's so reckless… And too smart for her own good…"
"We'll talk to her until she understands…" he replied, I nodded as I lean my helm onto his chestplates.
"I can't lose her…" I whimpered as I fought off the sobs building up inside me.
"We won't," he assured, I choked back a sob. "I'll do whatever I must to end this war."
"Don't you die." I pleaded as I chocked back another sob. "Please don't do anything too reckless… I don't know how I'd function without you…"
"I will do my best." He soothed; I gritted my denta as he rubbed my backstruts. Why can't he ever promise to live?!
(Optimus's POV)
We had retired to our room and Star cuddled up to my side with Stargazer against my chassis as he held her close. I know today had been hard on him. When I realised, she had been there I had been shocked. Then I had never felt such fear in an instant, one mistake and she would be gone… I would be devastated if anything happened to her and Star may just lose himself to his grief.
Back then he had been in a dark hole it took the war to really hit for him to even be able to try and work. Soon work became his way to cope, and he worked and worked past the point of exhaustion. It took a long time, a great time into the war for him to really live again. I had been hurt but seeing him fall apart had been worse than anything.
One time I had tried to talk to him but it had broken into an argument, he had lashed out. It was one of the few big fights we had ever had, he had screamed and cursed me out until he could barely talk. Then he broke into the most spark-wrenching wails as he huddled on the floor. I had held him as he cried for a long time, eventually, he passed out. I stopped pressing him after that.
One cycle he finally began to talk it had been slow small things here and there. After a while, he began to ease off on his excessive work and began to come back. It had been slow and even after he had recovered from the worst, he still had days. Days where I would hear him sob out his grief and frustrations.
"Mhmm." I heard looking down I saw Stargazer move a bit.
"It's alright." I hushed, she squirmed and turned to me her visor dim as she must be half-awake.
"Sire…" she mumbled her voice barely audible. "I'm sorry…"
"It's alright." I soothed reaching over to cup her cheekplate. "Just don't do that again…"
"I don't want to lose anyone…" she whimpered; I brushed my thumb under her visor wiping the forming tears. "Sire I'm scared…"
"I promise you that we will not go away." I hushed; she leaned her helm into my palm.
"I just want the war to end so everyone will be safe…" she sniffled.
"I will do everything in my power to end this war as soon as possible," I vowed; she nodded her helm into my servo.
"Don't go away…" she pleaded; I brushed her cheekplate softly.
"I won't," I promised, I hope that this doesn't turn into a lie someday, I want to stay and see you grow up.
I felt her head lull and I gently laid her helm against my chest; her visor dimmed and then went dark. She had fallen back to sleep her small servo lay across my chestplate from her shifting. I reached down and laid my servo over hers and let my optics offline. I will do all I can so that I never break that promise to you. Primus, please let me not lie to her…
(Stargazer's POV)
I sat on the med berth as Carrier and Sire stood before me, I felt so guilty. When I woke up, I saw Carrier looked complete distraught, and Sire had a worried look in his optics. I never really thought about how my actions were affecting them. I was just so stuck in my own mind, of course, they worried about me. I wasn't the only one who worried…
"Stargazer we need to set some new rules, and I want you to obey them." Carrier started, I nodded. "You are not to use the ground bridge without express permission, understood."
"Yes, Carrier," I replied.
"You are not to leave this base without express permission or being accompanied. If you are ever in a situation where you are by yourself outside you are to comm for a bridge." He continued; I nodded my helm. "Your self-defence training is suspended for the proceeding future. I will still do some basic medical training."
"I understand," I affirmed, he sighed and I saw Sire step forward.
"Stargazer you are not to involve yourself with matters of war," Sire ordered; I bit my lip but nodded.
"I will behave I'm sorry…" I apologized, I felt him place his servo on my helm.
"We love you very much, and we only want to protect you." Sire stated, I nodded. "Let us protect you."
"I'll be good," I promised, he knelt down and pulled me into a hug.
"You're a good feme." He hushed, I nodded into his chassis. "You're so young, leave all of the hard things to us."
"Just come home…" I pleaded, he scooped me up as I gripped onto his plating.
"I will." He hushed, I nodded as I clung to him. "I will."
(Ratchet's POV)
I knew that expression on his face as he hugged Star close, it was an expression that filled me with sadness. It was a looked he had too often during the look of someone who was unsure. He could never make himself lie to me but to others, he had to be the strong leader. He had to confident and be sure of himself and right now he wasn't.
I saw Star pull back and turn to me, I could see the tear tracks on her cheeks stemming from below her visor. Optimus handed her to me and I gently rubbed at her cheeks with a thumb. She sniffled and gripped onto my plating. She was just as scared now of losing us as the day she first arrived, wasn't she?
"No need to be scared, no matter what everyone will come home, even if they are hurt, I'll fix them up good as new." I hushed she nodded leaning into my palm. "Remember when you're scared or worried you can always come to us."
"Carrier it's scary waiting…" she whimpered; I knew that fear all too well…
"I know." I hushed pulling her close to me. "I know…"
I wish I could tell her that it will all be over soon or that what she fears will never come to pass. But I can't bring myself to make that lie not when I know better. Still I wish there was some way I could make her less afraid. Make it so she wasn't burdened by what happened to her creators and her ship. But that is once again something that I can't fix…
(Stargazer's POV)
"We're back!" Sides chimed, I looked up from my datapad to see him and Sunny drive-in and transform.
"Sunny, Sides!" I replied, they walked over to me and Sides scooped me up.
"How is our cute little sister?" he cooed, I smiled at him, I was glad I had them with us now.
"Okay, kinda bored though," I admitted, he bounced me in his hold.
"Bored? Well, we can't have that can we, right Sunny?" Sides hummed, Sunny chuckled.
"Must you always be so ridiculous." Sunny teased and took me from his twin.
"Let me guess Ratch grounded you?" he asked, I nodded. "So what you allowed to do?"
"I can do anything in Base that isn't combat training," I explained, he nodded patted my helm.
"Want to hear some stories?" he asked, I light up and nodded.
"Ooh, I got a good one!" Sides cheered, Sunny chuckled at him.
"Well we best get started or Sides will implode from eagerness." Sunny joked, Sides pouted, being with them like this made the war seem so far away.
(Later)
"You should have seen Ironhide's face, he was so pissed. We had to hightail it out of there or he probably would have beat us down for it. But his face made it worth it!" Sides explained, I giggled at his animated retelling of their prank.
"Sire put on cleaning duties for a deca-cycle after that stunt." Sunny added, elbowing his twin. "Why do I ever go along with your stupid ideas?"
"Cuz you love me?" Sides purred, Sunny shoved him playfully.
"For some reason." He huffed, I smiled as they began to bicker.
Lately, everyone has been busy with patrols and missions, I missed being able to relax and listen to everyone. I usually spent my time with Miko, Raf and Jack. It was nice to be able to be with my brothers, maybe they will be home more now. I heard pedefalls heading toward us, I looked up to see Carrier heading in.
"I swear I can hear you three at the other side of the base." He stated, his tone more teasing then annoyed.
"Just telling Star some stories Ratch-man." Sides retorted; Carrier shook his head smirking.
"I can only imagine what stories your telling…" he stated, Sides pouted up at him.
"What does that mean?" Sides whined, crossing his servos over his chassis.
"I mean he's not wrong." Sunny teased, Sides spun to his twin pouting.
"You too Sunny." He whined, Sunny snorted at Sides.
"Primus, you two will never change, will you?" Carrier teased fondly.
"Never Ratch." Sides affirmed; Carrier shook his helm.
"The other will return soon." He stated, I guess school was almost over.
"Hey, we should get Bee in on the next story!" Sides cheered, I smiled at him.
"He'll help me keep you from exaggerating." Sunny added, Sides huffed.
"I just tell stories like Old mech Hide did, remember the time he told us about the time he got kicked out of Maccadam's Oil House," Sided replied.
"Maccadam's?" I asked, I heard Carrier sigh.
"Was the most popular bar back on Cybertron, not the most reputable place but Ironhide loved to go there back in the day." Carrier explained, "Primus I've had to help drag him and that old fool Kup from that place way too many times."
"Wow, can you tell me more stories from back then Carrier?" I asked, he smirked a bit.
"I can tell you a few I guess." He stated, I raced to grab his pede.
"Let's do storytime when the others return!" I cheered, he chuckled.
"You're not gonna take no for an answer, are you?" he teased, as he reached to rub my helm. "One story but I do have work I need to do."
"Yay!" I cheered, it's nice to see Carrier relax.
(Optimus' POV)
I drove back into the base but I could hear Ratchet, not too sure what he was saying. As I drew closer I could hear him telling a tale much like I had heard him do before the war. I transformed and carefully peeked around the corner, he was sat on his medberth the others sat before him on the floor. I could see the humans sitting on their guardian's shoulders as they listened.
The smile he had on his face was full of life as he told them a tale from before the war. Star sat the closest to him listening to him so intently her visor off. The Twins sat a bit behind her on either side with Bumblebee behind them and they looked younger. It reminded me of when they were young and begged Ironhide for stories. He always indulged them, he loved to tell stories.
I hung back as Ratchet got the climax of his tale, Star, Bee, and the twins all leaned a bit forward eager for the ending. I remember when this happened. Ironhide had a friend, an older mech named Kup he had been a warrior from an older war. They were notorious for causing a fuss at Maccadam's. They had started a fight over something stupid and Chromia had called Ratchet to help her to get them out. He had been tired after spending a long time helping a patient. He threw his wrench across the bar and hit Ironhide in the helm. He marched over and drug them both out as everyone in the bar stood back in shock.
"That definitely sounds the old mech!" Bulkhead bellow letting out a chuckle.
"So that's when you learned to throw wrenches," Arcee commented.
"Tell us another Ratch!" Sides pleaded and Ratchet chuckled.
"I already told you only one, I have work to do you know." He replied with a warmth in his tone.
"Can you tell another one tomorrow?" Star asked as she grabbed his pede.
"Perhaps, now I really must get back to work." He answered, he patted her helm and left for the storage area.
I took a few steps back and transformed again driving into the room, Star raced over as I returned to my base form. She grabbed onto my pede looking up at me her optics practically sparkling.
"Optimus can you tell us a story!" she pleaded, I chuckled and patted her helm.
"Was Ratchet telling you all a story?" I quizzed, she nodded her helm.
"Yeah! It was really good! Please tell us one too!" she begged, I can't say no to that face.
"Alright," I answered, she beamed up at me. I am glad to see her so happy.