TFP: Youngling

Ch.47~ The Old You

I led Orion to our room after the awkward introductions, which of course had been filled with teasing. Reaching our room, I entered and he followed me in. He began to look around as I sat myself down on the berth. Stargazer was in recharge in my servos, her plump cheekplate pressed over my spark. I debated setting her down but I found myself unwilling to move her while she slept so deeply.

"I had not expected our room to be this.. bare…" he stated.

"Most of our things have been lost of the millennia of war, especially now that we've been on this planet," I explained, he nodded as he tentatively sat on the berth.

"We do not have much do we?" he quizzed, I sighed.

"No, must be a stark contrast to what you saw on the Decepticon warship. They certainly have more Cybertronian technology than us. Especially after they shot down the craft we took to this planet. And the others who were not on our ship arrived via space bridges with little supplies." I recounted, and he nodded solemnly.

"I am sorry, I feel like I should remember something like this." He apologized.

"I assume you have lost all your memories since we became Optimus." I mused, he looked confused.

"Optimus, so I had changed my name as well."

"I actually changed mine after you had already taken on your new name. You went to the heart of Cybertron and were given the Matrix of Leadership and became a true Prime. You claimed that Primus had bestowed you with the name Optimus Prime."

"I was named a Prime by Primus himself."

"Yes…"

"You do not sound happy about this."

"Neither were you, being a Prime, being Optimus meant that you could not just be Orion. You couldn't even promise to live…"

"I am sorry."

"I know why you couldn't, you did not want to lie to me."

"And why would that be a lie?"

"Because, as a Prime, if you had to sacrifice yourself for the greater good you would. Your current state is from that self-sacrificing nature. You sent the power of the Matrix to stop Unicron from awakening. It could have just as easily killed you."

"I am… I am truly sorry my love."

It was then I realized I was crying; I had been so angry all this time. Yet the person I am truly angry with is not here to answer for themselves. Orion has no memories of the bot who would make a choice like this. I couldn't bring myself to take my anger out on him. And yet…

It hurt.

"I want to scream at you, but you're not the one I'm mad at…" I began, my vocalizer felt raw and reset on me.

"Even if that is the case." Orion began and he gently cupped my cheekplates. "I am sorry, truly sorry. I hate to see you cry."

I wanted to sob; this was the Orion I had been only able to see glimpses of. Yet, I felt our daughter shift in my arms pressing closer to my plating. If I sob, I will wake her, I don't want her to see me like this. Orion brushed my cheekplates soothingly which made me want to sob more.

"I… I can't…" I began he looked at me concerned.

"What is wrong? You can cry, I've got you." he posed; I took a shaky vent.

"Our daughter is here." I reminded; his expression softened.

"Let us set her down." He urged; I shook my helm. "Love?"

"She will wake up if I do," I explained, he looked concerned. "She's been through a lot. She is still recovering and you disappearing…"

"Recovering?" he asked, I nodded.

"She wasn't doing well… We almost lost her…" I explained, he looked so concerned.

"I am so sorry my love." He apologized. "What can I do? What do you need?"

"I need you to hold us." I stated, "I need you to just be here, I don't need your apologies. Just stay by our side and be your soft gentle self. That's all we need."

"Of course, I will be here with you both no matter what." He hushed.

(Stargazer's POV)

I awoke slowly, I could feel two fields wrapped around me, onlining my optics I saw I was still cuddled up to Carrier. Turning to peek behind me I saw Sire laying behind me. He had an arm around Carrier's waist while the other was holding up his help a bit. I turned to face him.

Sire looked different, something about him was off. He looked almost younger. Was it because he lost his memories? Or that he wasn't a Prime right now.

I watched as his optics onlined and he turned his gaze to me. I froze under his gaze. He smiled sadly as he leaned down and kissed my helm crest. Pulling back, he looked down at me with a fond expression. Sire was still acting like a Sire even though he doesn't remember me.

"Did something wake you my dear spark?" he asked, I shook my helm.

"Just woke up," I answered he nodded.

"I see, what would help you fall back to sleep dear spark?" he quizzed, I nibbled my bottom lip.

"Can you, can you tell me a story, one about you and Carrier?" I quizzed, and he smiled happily.

"Did I ever tell you how I asked your Carrier to bond with me?" he said, I shook my head. "It had been a few stellarcycles after we had moved in together. Your Carrier is a very hard-working mech, he has been ever since I met him. It was part of what drew me to him, but it also made my attempts to ask him to bond quite interesting, to say the least."

I leaned back into Carrier's plating as my optics dimmed a bit. Sire's voice sounded just as comforting as it always had. He also still had the same smile he had when he'd told me stories before. Maybe Sire was going to be more like he was in private now. I don't think I'd mind that.

"The first attempt I had planned a lovely dinner at home for him for after his shift. But a mech came in needing emergency surgery so he had not been able to come home. On the second attempt, I had decided to ask him while he was in his office. Though again an emergency caused him to race off before I could ask. One would think the third time would go better but no he had been so busy with his work that he had fallen asleep before I could ask. I decided that I would wait for a moment that would work and stop planning this out. Soon the time came. We were home relaxing when I decided I should ask him. I got off our couch and knelt before him and proposed to him. I still remember how your Carrier looked. I will never forget that expression for as long as I live…"

(Orion's POV)

I smiled as I watched Stargazer fall into recharge, the way she leaned back into Starwatcher made my spark swell with fondness. I was glad to see we had been able to have a daughter. Even if she was not our CNA I can see how deep he and Starwatcher have bonded. They are Carrier and creation, no one could argue that fact once they saw them together.

Still.

There is a war raging that is killed so many and even our own planet. This is not the kind of place for such a small young innocent feme. This must be so tough on both of you. Had this war been the reason our daughter had been so sick. Had this war almost taken her life?

I must find a way to reclaim my memories. I need to know everything so I can protect them.

(Later)

I onlined slowly, and as I did, I saw Starwatcher sitting up on the berth. His wells were exposed as our daughter slowly nursed off his right well her frame curled up to him. Neither of them seemed to notice that I was awake. I couldn't help the fond smile that grew on my faceplate as I watched them.

"Good feme." Starwatcher hushed as he rubbed her helm. "Think you can give your Sire a chance today?"

"I will." She murmured.

"Such a good feme, now drink up I know you're not full yet." He hushed.

I smiled as I watched her return to fueling as Starwatcher gently rubbed her helm and cradled her. Everything about the way he held her and hushed her was spark warming. I wish I could remember the other countless times I must have seen them like this.

"Orion I can feel you staring." Starwatcher teased as he turned his gaze to me.

"I am sorry my love, I did not want to interrupt you both." I apologized as I slowly sat up. "Good morning, Love."

"Morning Sire." Stargazer greeted a bit of enriched energon falling from her lipplates.

"Good morning to you as well Stargazer." I chimed.

"Once she's done fueling, I think we should show you around the base. It's not that big but it can be a bit confusing at first." Starwatcher explained, I nodded.

"Of course, thank you."

I watched as Stargazer unlatched from his well and he pulled her back and closed his chestplates. Our daughter cuddled up to his chestplates and looked sleepy as she was gently rocked. It didn't take long for her to fall into recharge curled up to his chestplates. She looked more like a sparkling right now.

"Ready?" Starwatcher asked.

"Of course, led the way," I replied.

(Later)

I couldn't help but smile as Starwatcher led me around the base. It did my spark well to see him like this. The bond between him and Stargazer warmed my spark. Though at the same time I was sad, they did not deserve the hardships they've clearly gone through.

"Sire?" Stargazer said, I turned to see her looking at me.

"Yes, dear spark?" I replied, and she reached her servos up.

"Hold me." She said, I looked to Starwatcher and he smiled.

"Of course." I hummed and I gently picked her up and held her gently.

She shifted and cuddled up to my chestplates, I couldn't help but smile. Her faceplate was pressed into my chestplates, her cheek pressed into my plating. She looked so cute. I turned to see Starwatcher looking at me with a fond expression.

"Happy to have your Sire home now." Starwatcher hummed, she nodded into my plating.

"Morning!" a voice shouted, I turned to see Sideswipe and his twin Sunstreaker standing at the end of the hall.

"You're being too loud brat!" Starwatcher shouted back which made the red twin beam.

"So grumpy so early, you wound me." Sideswipe teased. "How's it going sis?"

"Good!" Stargazer chimed.

"Great!" Sideswipe cheered.

Suddenly he grunted and held his side as Arcee walked around him. She put a servo on her hip as she shot a glare at the red twin. Soon she turned to us a smile forming on her face.

"Good to see you three out and about. Now Sideswipe I think you and Sunstreaker are meant to be patrolling right now." Arcee stated.

"So mean Arcee," Sideswipe whined.

"Come on we saw them, time to get back to work." Sunstreaker states and begins to drag his twin away.

I couldn't help but smile at their energy, I can hear the two bickering as Sideswipe is dragged away. Arcee seemed to have a fond smile on her face as well before she slowly makes her way toward us. She stopped before us and set one servo on her hip.

"Hope you both had a relaxing night, for the time being, I'll manage the patrol and such. You three focus on trying to get Orion his memories back. We need him back out there as soon as we can, who knows what Megatron has planned next." She explained, then she turned to Starwatcher. "That means no working for you, and I don't care what excuses you have. Unless we absolutely need your medical skills you are to stay out of the command area. Got it?"

"So, you're in charge now, are you?" Starwatcher questioned; this may become an argument.

"I am, I will make sure things go smoothly while you focus on retrieving his memories. I'm sure you can do that, right?" she countered, he snarled glaring down at the feme. "Focus on your mech and daughter for once, like it will kill you to take it easy for once."

"I believe she has a point love," I stated, he sighed and crossed his servos over his chassis.

"Fine, but if there is an emergency I will come." He huffed, and she smirked.

"Sure, sure, now you three have fun." She chimed and waved a servo as she continued down the hall.

"Well, I guess we can just return to our room for now," Starwatcher stated, I smiled nodding.

"I shall enjoy this time I get to spend uninterrupted with you both." I hummed, he blushed but smiled.

"I suppose that is another way to see this." He murmured.

"Maybe stories will help!" Stargazer chimed, I looked down at her curiously. "We can tell him stories about the things he's forgotten, I've seen that work in cartoons."

"I suppose it couldn't hurt, though to remember Star those shows are not real so don't take advice from them without asking me," Starwatcher advised; she nodded her head. "Alright let's head back to our room."

"Lead the way, my love." I hummed.