Chapter 25: If We Were Normal
"I don't know what I think we are. I just know that I like the fact that there's an 'us' to talk about."
- This is us
After Jay went after Hailey, Erin stayed and updated everyone on what was going on, the changes that were about to happen and as Jay said in the car they loved the news. They were grateful that she was willing to actually come back so they didn't lose their jobs, plus none of them wanted to change jobs, at least not for now and Lindsay was trustworthy, they knew they would be fine in her hands, they would handle everything. as a team, Lindsay would just be the leader and they were content with that.
After finishing the conversation with their friends, Adam and Kevin discovered that Charlotte was with Trudy and both began to discuss who would be the best to make her laugh as they went after the girl. Erin walked through the bullpen, good memories flashed through her mind about this place, it had always been her home, she loved her job, the team that became her family and she was very happy with the life she had now, but she won't lie that a part of her was glad to be back.
However, it was quite odd that she wouldn't be sitting at her old desk, that Jay wouldn't be the person she would discreetly watch while he was concentrating or flirt and tease at work like he had been from the first day they met until the last. her day.
She walks into Hank Voight's office, now his office for the next few months. She can't even believe this was happening, she never thought that she would replace him. It was never her intention, the truth is that Lindsay was never one to think much about the future, she stopped that when she turned 10, she believed that her life would never get better, so all the good events in her life, she saw more as luck than her own merit, but she also saw how life was just toying with her, as if as soon as she was given something very good it would rip it out in the most painful ways possible, it had been like that her whole life, it wouldn't be any different now. She may look brave on the outside, but her biggest nightmare is what the future has in store for her, how many people is she going to lose?
- Are you prepared to take over? says Kimberly's voice from the office doorway.
- The sincere answer? - the brunette turns around with a half smile. - No... I keep wondering if I'm not going to screw everything up and make your situation worse...
- Erin, we trust you, always. We missed you and like I said before, we are not the same anymore, you gave up your life in NY to help us, we are family and I'm sure we will only be more sure spending this time together, I think that's why all this is happening, I feel that good things are coming.
As they say, opposites attract. Kim looked like a little girl, Erin loved that side of her, it didn't make her weaker, as the federal agent always knew the officer's ability, but it made her even more human. She was the type of person who saw life more on the optimistic side, good things will always happen, everything has a meaning behind it. While for Lindsay, in addition to being realistic, she was very pessimistic, she was trying to be less for Charlotte, but still, she didn't believe that the world was a good place, it was a cruel place, full of cruel people and that the rare exceptions they were good and the rest, they could live an acceptable life, not full of trauma, but also not full of joy, but that didn't matter and didn't affect their friendship.
- Oh... sorry. - the officer says as soon as the cell phone rings. - I have to go, Mak is already released, I need to go get her.
- Go there... see you soon...
- Let's go, we need to gather everyone at Molly's like old times. -she says blowing kisses and turning around.
Erin doesn't even know what to do, doesn't even know if she has anything to do, she looks around the room some more, smiles when she sees a photo of her with Justin and Camille, one of Daniel and a very recent one, it was just Charlotte, a photo that Hank asked for that she sent.
Erin smiles at that, Hank was understanding that she was a grown woman, that she didn't need control, she was happy with this new relationship they were building, maybe not all changes are bad...
- Am I disturbing? -her thoughts evaporate when hearing Halstead's voice.
-No...-she smiles softly and puts her daughter's photo back in place.
- Are you prepared for... - the man thinks for a while. - All of that? -she expresses "everything" gesturing with her hands in the air.
-You asked the same question as Kim...-she smiles at him.
- What answer did you give her?
-The most sincere ... no ...-she releases a breath that was held. - I don't know what we're getting into with all this, but it's stronger than me, you know, it's like a sign, a call that I should be here. I don't know ...-she says, putting the chair closest to the table and walking over to Jay. - Is Hailey still around? I would like to talk to her.
- In fact, I told her to go home and rest, she's not well, but I asked that after she took some time for herself, that she come to talk, I don't think they'll be able to work like this without you two talking first.
- Yes. Ehh.. I'll be on my way...
- I'll take you. He steps aside to make way for her.
- No need, I think you can go home, stay with Hailey, I think she shouldn't be alone. -she says passing by him, but walking slowly knowing he's right behind.
- I brought you, so I'll take you. -Jay wasn't even going to argue that he wanted to stay with her as long as possible, he just stated making it clear that she had no choice and if he insisted, she knew he would use her charm with Charlotte and she couldn't say no.
On the way to the hotel, they didn't talk about the subject that the man had with Voight or what he had with Hailey, Erin even thought about trying, but something told her that at that moment she wouldn't get anything from him. The way he seemed airborne even with Charlotte was one more reason to know that whatever it was he'd been talking to both of them had unsettled him, the problem was that Erin couldn't figure it out.
- When are you going to NY? - as soon as he parks at the hotel, Jay asks.
- Actually, I was talking to Tess and Nick and I think I'll go this weekend. Ivory Tower is having the meeting tomorrow and I'm sure I'll start on Monday. So I have 4 days to do a thousand and one things, which means I should have already started yesterday. - She laughs as she takes off her seat belt.
"I can go?" or "I'll go with you." ? Jay was silent because he was thinking. First, that he wasn't invited, didn't want to be intrusive, so maybe offering would be a good idea so that she would at least consider the idea, but on the other hand... well, Erin is going alone with her daughter and goes having to go back alone too. Considering Kim won't be keeping company because of Makayla, nor will Nick and Tereza be able to go back to Chicago with her because they're working, Jay had a few ideas.
He knows she can't do all this without support, would she make it? He knows so.
Is he going to let her do it all by herself? Absolutely not. As she said, she has a lot to do in a short amount of time.
- When will you go? - question.
- I think tomorrow after the meeting, so Charlie spends more time with her uncles and I'll be back on Sunday, but I don't know what I'm going to do, I'm still at the hotel and Charlotte doesn't even have anyone to stay with... - says putting hands over her face and throwing her head back against the seat. - But first I need to solve NY and after I'm here, I worry about it. - informs.
- Great, tomorrow after the meeting. I'm going to leave my things in my car and I'll come by to pick you up, I think that way we can go straight from the district. he says matter-of-factly, not noticing Erin's gaze.
- Jay, you...
- Erin... - he turns to her and looks into her eyes. - Let's not argue. I'll go with you and Charlotte, we'll take care of what we have to take care of there. About your house, well... I know a guy... - they both laugh, he always knows someone for absolutely everything. - And I'm sure the firefighters, Hermann especially, know nannies, preschools, nurseries or whatever, very well. We can work it out and we're going to do it together, it's not up for discussion, okay?
- Yes sir... - he teases with an admiring smile as he gets out of the car and picks up a sleeping Charlotte.
As he informed, Jay had his bag ready for 3 days and he smiled when he saw that Erin didn't question it and showed up with her things and Charlie's too, it wasn't much, because everything they had was in NY, but just the necessary for Charlotte to spend the day until they arrived in NY.
- What we have? -Lindsay asks as soon as she sees Trudy with a not the best expression.
- The deputy superintendent arrived and has a detective and a technology team here. - she informs pulling the child into her arms.
Erin had already warned that her daughter would be staying with Trudy again, which she didn't complain about. Apparently she loved a sergeant's day with the sergeant.
- We already imagined... - Erin says and Jay nods, both soon head to the bullpen.
- Agent Lindsay... Detective Halstead... or shall I call you Lieutenant and Sergeant-to-be? - Nathan Courtney, the superintendent in charge says as soon as he sees them coming up the stairs.
- Lieutenant, please...
- Detective, I haven't taken the test yet.
Both say while greeting. None of the three knew each other well, but neither did they have any enmity, Courtney was the new SA since everything had been happening since Samantha and he was just following orders, so a cold war was not created, not even when they were introduced to the new colleague of their work, Dante Torres, he could just be disguising it, but it didn't look strange and so everyone was properly introduced.
The SA explained how everything would work.
First, Lindsay said it was temporary, then she offered that everyone could take the sergeant's exam, which led to Jay agreeing, saying he wasn't getting into a dispute with his colleagues, but none of them wanted to, everyone was fine with Jay being able to take over at the time. future. Soon after, they were explained about the changes that would occur in those days in the place. The cameras that had only been in the interrogation rooms since the Lindsay episodes years ago were expanded, now the entire police station would have them, including the garage. The only ones that were free were the office that was now officially Lindsay's, the bullpen, the locker room, the break room, and of course, the restrooms. Even the hallways would be equipped.
In the bullpen the organizations would be ordered by Lindsay, what changed was that a screen was added and the whiteboard was removed. They would have to do everything online, the files, the paperwork would have to be emailed, no more paperwork. They didn't care so much about doing with the papers, but they also knew that technology would optimize their time and that was a positive point.
In addition to introducing Detective Torres, they said they wanted Lindsay to put someone else with them, they wanted more efficiency, so she said she'd look into it once she was in charge on Monday.
- I think that was all, any other questions? - after all that has been said, explained and a few questions, Courtney realizes that all team conversations have been resolved. - Well, Detectives Upton and Halstead and Lieutenant Lindsay, can we speak in private, please?
Erin led them into the office and once the door was closed for privacy, he explained himself.
- Well, I'm not very aware of everything that happened to your sergeant, but they said to let you know... - he says looking at Erin. - That your agreement stands with some amendments. Sergeant Voight will be investigated for everything, not just the latest events. - she tells. -Miss ...-now she looks at Hailey. - It will also be under investigation and what is discovered will bring penalties for you, they didn't tell me which penalty and I believe they will only know when they find out the truth about everything that happened. - it says. - They have a recording of you going to the body... - Now talk to Jay. - Well, they won't investigate, because it was days after the murder, so they know you can say you were threatened and they won't have strong arguments, besides that they trust you, so, as said, the agreement with you two continues.
After explaining everything he leaves and Erin's cell phone rings.
- We can talk? - Hailey asks Jay.
- Yes, go ahead and I'll find you. - he asks seeing that Lindsay is with Hank on the cell phone.
- Yes... ok... I'll be right there. - says and hangs up staring at Halstead who was waiting. - I need to go, Voight wants to talk, do you need something?
- No, I think now it's just getting to work on Monday. - says and she agrees. - Ehh... I'm going to talk to Hailey, you can go and when I finish here, I'll stop by the hospital and let's go. You can keep the car, I'll ask her to give me a ride. Could it be?
- Sure. - says and both walk out. - Until later. - she says goodbye heading towards the stairs as he enters the break room.
As soon as he arrived at the hospital Voight was updated on everything, he didn't look happy but Erin wouldn't judge, nothing was going to be easy for him and she couldn't even say she made it easy for him so she just understood that he wanted to be updated on the decisions, but did not want to dwell on the topic.
- So you're going to NY? - Voight asks.
- Yes, I'm going to take Charlotte to enjoy the last few days there and say goodbye to everyone before definitely moving here. - she doesn't mention that Jay is coming along and hopes he doesn't ask anything like that, but luckily for her, he seems more interested in something else than that.
- That's good, but when you come back where will you stay? Already have a home? - question.
-Not yet, I'm looking at some...-she also omits Jay's help on this. - Nothing certain, but I hope that next week I already have something...
- You already have it, stay with me at home...
- Hank...
- Listen to me first. - he asks. - I know I failed and you're giving me a second chance. This is the opportunity, I'm not going to be in this hospital forever, as soon as I leave I'm going home, I'm going to need help and when I'm better I know you're going to need help with Charlotte, we can do this, just everything falls into place, you won't be here for long anyway, I want to be close to Charlotte and if you let me help you with work.
- I am going to think.
- It's the best decision for peanut... it's only 6 months, please, I promise to behave in the hospital...
- I agree if you stay in the hospital until Doctor Salvatore feels confident in letting you go home, not in leaving here in a few days.
- Deal. - he says and Erin finds it strange that besides insisting that they stay with him, he immediately agreed.
Erin smiles at the thought that he's really changing, but feels sad that maybe it's him afraid of losing them, at least he's changing, she thinks...
After agreeing to stay with Voight, Jay announces that he has arrived and Erin takes the daughter that was being fought over by Maggie and Natalie. The girl apparently got along with both of them and Erin found the scene cute, not even realizing that Salvatore wondered how the girl got along so well with everyone, but with him, she was extremely shy.
In the car, Jay asked about the conversation with Voight and was impressed that she agreed to move back in with him, but unlike her, he thought otherwise, because he just realized that Hank Voight had some plan in mind when he saw that he was playing with both. Erin talked about how he wanted to get closer, that he was trying hard and that they were probably creating a new relationship with a little more trust and without him controlling her. Jay, on the other hand, knew it was something else, Voight seemed like he would never let go of control, he wanted her in his house, because he knew that way he could control Jay's visits, he could keep him away from both of them and he was getting irritated just with the thought.
Just like before, when he was at an impasse as to whether he should ask or assert himself about going to NY, he was at an impasse now, but he chose the other alternative, he wasn't going to tell Erin this, he didn't want to stress her out. Furthermore, he was also withholding information from her, of course, it wasn't like Voight, but still, he was, so he stayed silent.
Erin asked what Hailey wanted with him, but he didn't tell her, they were full of mysteries which made Erin think they were really together and that's why he didn't share it with her, maybe the atmosphere was weird, but she also wondered if they were together why would he leave Hailey like that to travel with his ex and her daughter?
Well, Lindsay's mind came up with a pretty quick answer to that. Erin did the math and everything fell into place. Jay was righteous, he was dating Hailey and he felt betrayed by the blonde's lie, the truth about that night with Marcus came from Voight, someone the detective didn't trust, rather than Hailey, his girlfriend, who he not only trusted, but He left his life in her hands. So maybe they were taking a break, Jay loves her and as hurt as he was, he couldn't break up and Erin knows how thoughtful and caring he is even when he's angry, whereas Hailey is hurting from everything that's going on and the fact that he's always with her ex was what made her attack the day before. Also, Jay is a peacemaker, he even said they couldn't work that way earlier, so he's being the justice of the peace there.
For Erin that was the logical answer and she couldn't think much further as she noticed they were already at the airport. They checked in and as they bought the ticket at the last minute they got separate seats.
- I'll put it on, take Charlie. - Jay says passing the girl to Erin so he can keep his hand luggage.
Erin quickly sits down with her daughter while Jay guards her, but as soon as the girl sees that he hasn't sat down next to her, she starts complaining.
- Jay...
- Hey sweetie...
- I'll sit here, want to come with me? - he asks.
- His place is over there and ours here, do you want to go with him or with me? But it has to be one of the two, when the plane takes off we won't be able to change much...
- Sorry to interrupt... - a woman beside Erin starts and calls the attention of the three, but she is looking at Jay. - We can change, so the little girl doesn't need to stay away from mom or dad...
- It's uhh I... no...
- I insist, I'm already in the hallway, it won't make any difference. - interrupts him already getting up. Erin exchanges a look with Jay and the woman seems to give the couple no other option, so they accept.
- Thank you very much. - Jay says as soon as they are settled in their new places.
- That's it, you are a very beautiful family. - smiles at them.
- Us...
- Passengers...
They are interrupted and in the end neither of them denies the woman, they didn't say they weren't a family, even if they seemed to be one, even if they almost were. The trip was very smooth. Charlotte was on cloud nine, literally. She was super calm alternating between Erin and Jay until she finally fell asleep in the man's arms and when they least expected it, they were already disembarking.
Neither of them had ever realized how much a couple with a child is called a family by people. As they disembarked, they were praised and even the taxi driver asked if they were a family outing or returning from one.
- Are you in the city that never sleeps or do you live here? - you ask.
- Actually, I used to live here, but we're from Chicago and we're moving back there. - Erin says.
- Oh, they just came for one last farewell...
- Something like. - Jay looks at Erin.
The man doesn't ask much, he just made his own conclusions, but what impressed the couple, was that none of these people who called them family were corrected, they didn't see themselves doing that and being honest, if they asked why the answer in voice high would just be because it would be easier than explaining the mess that the situation really was, clearly a totally different answer than the one they both kept inside.
- You can stay in Charlotte's room, or if you prefer in my room and I'll stay in her room, I have an air mattress and...
- Actually, if you don't mind I think I can stay on the couch, it looks good to me. - comments.
-Someone taught me about function and form...-at the same moment those words come out of her mouth she regrets it, because it's as if memories of her came to light.
They both remember the first time he commented on it, they remember taking the couch to the apartment, how they were supposed to test if it was comfortable just sitting on it, but then pecks started to be exchanged until Jay pulled her in for a lingering kiss and they finish the test drive on the sofa being perfect, soft but firm while being completely naked and sweaty...
- I think you learned very well... - teases Jay.
Was that flirting? Holy fuck what was he doing? Erin wonders nervously, while Jay scolds himself. The mood was suddenly tense, a tension they knew all too well as it had lingered for years in their relationship, the sexual tension. That wasn't good, that wasn't good at all, but why the hell did Lindsay smile at him? Shit Jay needed to hold back but it was impossible with those shy dimples of hers a real fake shy as he knew how sassy Erin Lindsay could be but what the fuck were these two doing looking at each other nervously and slowly closing the space between them . They didn't know what they were doing and if it weren't for the knock on the door startling them, they probably would have taken the "didn't know what they were doing" to a level approaching a test drive of Lindsay's couch.
- I think it's Tess...
As soon as she opens the door she is bombarded by friends, hugs, smiles, chatter and they even bring food.
Erin was grateful for her friends, for her friends to have stopped the stupid thing she had almost done, a stupid thing the stupid part of her wanted to do. Stupid...
-Stupid, stupid, stupid ...-Charlie says and gets everyone's attention and only then does Erin notice that she spoke aloud.
- Who's stupid? - Nick asks the girl, but looking at her mother.
- We were watching Lucca on the plane, the character says that. - perfect, a children's movie saving her from a slow, humiliating death.
What were they thinking? Erin almost got carried away, her daughter was sleeping in the next room and what if she woke up? You didn't have to do anything on the couch, you could have taken it to your room and locked the door... Stop it!
- Is Erin okay? - Nick asks. Erin wasn't realizing that she was totally berating herself.
- Yeah, just thinking out loud, sorry. - he says and finally get lost in a subject, letting his mind distract from his stupidity.
What the fuck were you thinking, seriously? Were you thinking of taking a test drive on your ex's couch, with her daughter in the next room, right after your most current ex proposed? What the fuck, Jay. He too had that moment in his head. He was probably thinking with his head down, it's not possible.
Did he almost risk their friendship over a silly memory? What? Would they make up if they had sex on her couch like last time? Come on, of course not! Perhaps it was the fact that they were called family all day that stirred them, that made the mood go from light to tense.
Jay was grateful for Erin's friends, he couldn't be that clueless.
Nick and Tess were updated on what was happening in Chicago and the future agent's plans for the coming months. Erin and Jay were updated on what was happening in Manhattan and their plans in the time she would be gone. However, these were minor matters, as they soon got lost in nicer matters and stayed up all night drinking and talking. After Charlotte went to sleep they went to the porch of Erin's house and stayed there for hours.
Jay was happy hearing stories about Erin and as much as he could have been saddened by the past, that wasn't what lingered in his mind, he was happy for her, to have such good friends and enjoyed their stories, as did the two of them. New Yorkers were amused by the stories of when Jay and Erin were partners. It wasn't bad nostalgia that left the mood heavy, it was relaxed and remembering good times, making plans to create memories the four of them together and memories with the Chicago team.
The only problem with that was later, when Tess and Nick left. Both a little drunk, the tension didn't seem to go away anytime soon, but to protect herself and Jay, Erin used her daughter as her shield, tucking the girl into her bed so she wouldn't risk doing anything wrong, as as soon as she looked at Charlotte sleeping in her arms, she would feel guilty for having thoughts that were far from innocent, thoughts that involved her daughter being locked in her room so as not to risk seeing her mother and Jay taking an 18+ test drive on her couch.
Erin woke up with a headache, but no big deal, she was glad she didn't have a hangover. They hadn't had much to drink the night before and that was just fine. She notices that her daughter is not snuggled in her and gets up to find her daughter's whereabouts, as soon as she opens the bedroom door she is greeted by innocence, her daughter was laughing, the most delicious laugh in the whole world.
- And it's one, it's two, it's three and... - Another laugh.
Erin notices Jay throwing her daughter in the air, they were in the dining room and to her surprise it was good, but not good at all, the man was only in sweatpants, his shirt was there God knows where.
-it's two, it's three and...-and again, but as soon as she's safe in Jay's arms ready to ask for more, she spots her mother.
- Mommy, look... do it again Jay... - she asks and the man obeys, but only once more earning a laugh from the girl and a compliment from her mother, before he puts her on the ground to run into her arms her.
- What are you doing? -she asks as soon as she kisses the temple of the three year old girl.
- Breakfast... - Jay turns to face Erin.
DAMN IT, DAMN IT, DAMN IT, A THOUSAND TIMES DAMN, she shouldn't have looked at his body, his abdomen, that v that disappeared into the sweatshirt and that she knew very well where it led, knew so well that her perverted and uncontrolled body was yearning at that exact moment. moment, but why did she suddenly turn into a pervert? So she answers his question by looking once more, how could she not be a pervert with a view like that? Honestly no. People who never had wanted it, and the bigger problem was that Erin had it, many, many, many times...fuck.
- Mommy... - that's Erin Lindsay, be a pervert looking at your ex's hot body that is committed, while having the purest version of innocence in your arms.
Erin shakes her head and gives her attention while Jay, probably out of sheer mercy, puts on a shirt.
- We were making dough and she accidentally spilled it on me, I was going to change it but she was sad for getting me dirty and I didn't want her to cry, so I was throwing her in the air. - Jay explains when Charlotte is sitting at the table waiting for them to put breakfast.
The coffee was great, they had fun, they talked, and Jay managed to be less perverted than Lindsay. He had his inappropriate thoughts in a dream about Erin that would be fully censored, which gave him a morning hard and he ran to the bathroom for a cold shower, he literally needed to control himself, what was that woman doing to him?
The day of the three was peaceful. Jay accompanied Erin everywhere, he stayed with Charlotte while she sorted things out. Charlotte's school, which luckily for her had offices in several states, one of them in Chicago, Illinois. Which gave her one less job when she was told that they would send her transfer by email to the other school. Then she would already have a place to stay in the morning and in the afternoon. Erin visited FBI headquarters, spoke with her team and Marshall, and they also met Mackenzie, the nanny.
The girl was totally upset to learn that she would no longer have that much contact with Charlotte, the two had a very strong connection. Also, Mac asked if Erin would be interested in renting the apartment to her and a friend of hers. Which Erin finally agreed with and said that Nick and Tess would work things out with her after Erin left a space for the girls.
Jay and Erin walked with Charlotte in the park and had lunch with Nick and Tess. It was a great day and once again people referred to them as family, none of them denied it.
- So which do you prefer? - Jay asks as soon as they arrive at Erin's building.
It was already late, it was past Charlotte's bedtime, they were taking advantage of this time to be with Nick and Tess and simply lost themselves in conversations, it was so good to be so light with their friends, at the moment Erin was with her daughter asleep in the arms and Jay right on their heels, they were deciding how they were going to get back to Chicago, if they would fly back and Erin would leave the car or if they would take the road together.
- I think we did it, Charlotte loves to travel by car and the two of us sharing the wheel I'm sure it won't be a problem. - she says and Jay nods.
- Agreeing to share the steering wheel? Things change... - he jokes.
-I share the wheel for a long time, okay ...-she says getting in as soon as he opens the door.
- I remember, I had to make sacrifices to get such a privilege...
And again, what the fuck were they doing? The way they were blatantly flirting was shocking. Erin knew what "sacrifices" he was talking about, ones that were well worth it, and if she still knew him as she'd like to think she did, she remembered one specific one, one that was long before the GMC came into play, one that he convinced her very well when he wanted to drive all the way to Wisconsin. She had never felt so much pleasure in giving up the wheel as she did then.
- I'm going to put Charlie to bed. -she says after swallowing hard.
- I think I'll take a shower. - preferably cold. She leaves the last part only in her mind.
As soon as she left her daughter in bed, Erin went to her room, she also needed a bath, a very cold one to see if she put out that fire she was in. She doesn't know why she suddenly looks like a pervert, a sex-crazed dog in heat, it's okay that she hasn't had fun in a while, but man, she wasn't like this with Jay before, she honestly doesn't know what was going on with she.
As soon as she finishes the bath, she feels calmer, more relaxed and feels like the water helped put out her fire. Wrapped in her white towel, she curses Jay as soon as he knocks on the door. 3 minutes, she only needed that to change her clothes, but then she remembers earlier today, how she almost attacked him if it wasn't for the 3 year old girl in the room with them, then she would reciprocate. Taking a deep breath and begging for self-control, she opens the door as soon as she reaches it.
- Sorry, you have... - and if Jay could think, he would probably be surprised at how someone who has been literate since he was 5 years old doesn't know how to speak anymore, how he simply lost all the lines.
Erin's hair was loose and wet, it was dark brown, totally natural and bigger than he'd ever seen it before, the white towel wrapped around her body left little to the imagination and he saw her black painted feet bare on the carpet, she she was in a towel, it was just a pull and he would see it all, see all of her body, what his own body craved, he wanted to see it again, he needed to see it again, he never forgot a detail, but what if he had? Or else see something that wasn't there before...
"I'm sorry..." He swallows hard and looks into her eyes, trying to think better of it, but it doesn't help when those hazel green ones look dark with desire, probably a reflection of his own. - I think... I... I... the soap... this... - he remembers why he was there. - the soap ran out and I didn't know where to find another one... - he says.
- Oh... yeah... I keep it there. -she says leaving with the towel and going to a closet in the hallway of the house, Jay follows her. -Here...-she takes it and when she turns around, she notices that the space between them is almost tiny, a step that Jay takes closes the distance completely.
-Thank you...-she whispers, her voice sends a shiver through her whole body.
- Do you... er... need anything else? she asks, totally nervous.
Should Jay have walked away? Of course, it was just a step back, that's all, but in addition to forgetting lines, he was also terrible at directing, because instead of taking a step back, he takes one forward and Erin finds herself pressed between the mini closet. and the big closet that was Jay's body.
- I think I can take that towel too...
That wretch leaned in on purpose, Erin is no idiot, the way he pressed her and leaned dangerously close to her face was enough for the woman. She couldn't take it anymore and pulled Jay together, it was so wrong, so wrong.
It was all Jay's fault, it was the fault of the conversation she overheard earlier from him, she swears she wasn't eavesdropping and listening to his conversation, but her ears pricked up when she heard Jay say he had nothing to do with Hailey anymore, that he was friends her and just wanted to take care of her because she was in a bad way. It was a conversation with Will, Jay was asking his brother to check on her and he ended up asking the status of their relationship, so Lindsay overheard.
That was why, as wrong as she felt it was, at least she wouldn't feel the guilt of getting someone compromised, but actually she wanted to think that he was with Hailey, because maybe she wasn't pressed in the closet at home. with Jay's tongue asking for passage which was quickly accepted. She wouldn't be moaning when Jay gripped her waist and pressed himself against her letting her feel how his body was reacting because of her.
It wasn't their first kiss since they met again, but it was different, that one was almost a kiss of longing, guilt and forgiveness, this one wasn't romantic at all, it was totally erotic, strong and that made clear the desire to have each other. Her tongues dueling for dominance, Erin's throat releasing sinful sounds that vibrated throughout Jay's body making him even harder. The way Jay was squeezing her, pressing her down, making her yearn for him even more. Erin's hands go up to the back of Jay's neck, her fingers tangling in his hair and a smirk on her lips as she tugs lightly.
Jay's free hand - the hands that were free after he threw the towel and soap on the floor, was much bolder, it slid across Erin's bare thigh and instead of stopping or climbing over the towel, Jay let it get lost inside, the shiver in Erin's body and the moan was more fuel for him to continue until his hand found a band of her ass and squeezed, the man missed that, touching that soft part of her body and he knew that she liked. He left her hand there for a moment, while they both reveled in the kiss, Jay slid his lips over her chin, jaw and neck that increasingly gave way for him to explore. Erin misses his lips on hers and soon pulls him back to her mouth. Jay was uncontrollable and after one more stroke of Erin's ass he slowly started to slide lower, he knew she was wet but wanted to feel it for himself, however, even though it was Erin who started all of this, he needed to be sure .
- He is sure? he asks, his hand landing unfairly close to where she wanted him most, that was low game.
-Jay ...-her voice comes out more like a moan, begging him to touch her.
- Erin, I need you to answer me... are you sure? I need to know if you're as wet for me as I think you are... - even if she wasn't sure with that dirty talk from Jay she'd throw any caution to the wind.
- Yes... look how wet you make me... - teases biting his earlobe, if he wanted to play, then two could play this game.
She moans when his fingers touch her intimacy and he groans when he sees how wet she is, much more than he imagined.
-Damn it, Erin...-Jay whispers and kisses her, two of her fingers penetrating her.
Erin reaches down and grabs Jay's cock by his pants, she's missed touching him so much.
- I need you to stop me now or I don't know if I can answer for myself... - he says as soon as she caresses him.
Her hands go inside his pants and underwear and she caresses his hot and hard flesh, spreading the pre-cum with her thumb, while she licks her lips looking at him and smiling maliciously as she slides her lips to his earlobe, licking and biting before speaking:
-So don't answer for yourself ...-she squeezes his cock. - Answer for him and answer for... - she wiggles in his fingers still inside her. - for me.
He was going to, he wasn't going to take so much teasing, he didn't want things to be like this, neither did Erin, but their bodies didn't care about political correctness, they had their minds clouded with desire and reason probably got in the way. Chicago, because they were being completely unreasonable and didn't even care, not when Jay was seconds away from giving Lindsay the first of many orgasms he planned for tonight.
However, they weren't in luck, not when someone knocks on their door, not when they get scared and accidentally knock some products out of the cupboards, not when the door slams again loudly and they hear Charlotte crying, probably because the two of them were frozen in place, their hands busy with each other, the person at the door apparently insisting and Charlotte asking for her mother.
They walk away quickly, not on a good footing at all, hands dirty on each other, Jay with a raging hard-on he's not even advised to help the kid or answer the door, never mind the person on the other side seeing a guy who doesn't own the house answering the door totally hard. Lindsay was female, even easier to disguise, even if she was on fire and rage because she was literally seconds away from a wonderful orgasm by Jay's fingers. Even though her boobs had their headlights on, it wasn't a problem, the problem was that she didn't want to answer the door in a towel, let alone leave Jay to sort it out while she dealt with her daughter.
By getting her mind out of the gutter as it needed to reason, Erin manages to handle it all.
-You solve it ...-she points to the things that fell to the ground. - And that... - they both look at his erection. This wasn't how Erin wanted it resolved, but they had no other option at the moment. - I'll handle the door and Charlie. - As if on cue, the door slams once more and the girl screams again for her mother.
Erin walks to the door.
"Damn..." she curses. She completely forgot that Marvin said he would stop by after work to help her with some things both in NY and Chicago and they would still have to fill out a form about the situation she was at work now. Why is she so dumb? - Marvin... - She only opens the door a space. - Apologies for the delay.
- I thought you weren't. - he starts off all bland. Lindsay asked him to go, she said she wouldn't know how to set things up let alone move change about work, but the horny Erin of now hates Erin so much she thought about work hours ago.
- Sorry, I was in the shower... - says over her daughter's crying, what a great mother she was being.
-Jay...-the girl calls when she doesn't have her mother's answer and as she should have done much earlier, she gets up from her bed.
- Hi my baby... - The guilt of what he was doing and for leaving Charlotte crying, was enough for Jay's erection to decrease and the guilt to grow, without even noticing how he had just referred to the girl. - Come here, mom was answering the door, did you scare? - he asks and the girl nods a yes and lays her head on his shoulder as he walks towards the entrance. - Go change... - he says and Erin nods. - Hey Marvin, sorry for the delay, everything happened so fast, I dropped things in the closet, Erin getting out of the shower, you arriving and Charlie crying... - She apologizes for the half-truth opening the door for the man to enter.
- It's okay, I didn't want to bother, work ended later, I thought they were already sleeping. - says entering.
- All right... do you want some water while you wait Erin? - offers.
- Yes please. - and Jay thanks him, he needed to wash his hand, he was holding Charlotte avoiding touching the girl with a dirty hand, but it was hell you had to act only as Jay a friend of an innocent creature and a Jay friend helping the woman move since seconds ago all he wanted was to be the Jay who had Erin with her legs wrapped around his waist while he pressed her against the closet pushing them both to the limit.
He washes his hands, gets the water, all with Charlotte who has been watching his every move in silence, not crying or anything and when he appears with the water, Erin appears dressed.
Jay went into Charlotte's room and put her to sleep while Erin did what she had to do. These were things that couldn't be postponed, she needed to take care of it and it would be a bitch to make her friend work on Sunday, so for an hour and a half she managed to sort out what was necessary, thanked her friend and he wished her good luck in Chicago before he left from her apartment.
As Erin walked down the hall, she glanced at the closet, these closets would never be looked at the same way again, but now she reminded her of her sexual frustration, however, the brunette scolded herself. Look at the chaos she caused by kissing Jay, she was completely out of her mind.
She walks to her daughter's room, Jay hasn't left since he entered with the girl and they were in complete silence, as soon as he opens the door he discovers the reason. Jay was lying on the girl's bed all awkward and Charlotte was lying with her head on his chest and her little legs horizontally on the bed. Neither of them seemed in a comfortable position, but they were in such a deep sleep that she left it, she knew Jay would complain in the morning, but in the situation she finds him, his fully excited side would get him out of there just so they could enjoy the jobs. who are responsible for making a woman bring cute little creatures like Charlotte into the world and as much as she yearned for Jay to continue what he started, now saner, she knows she shouldn't do that. So she turns off the light and closes the door to her daughter's room and goes to her own, trying to sleep and not thinking about Jay pleasuring her and being a complete foul mouth, she knew he would go beyond those words and she was getting hot. just thinking about it, but finally she fell asleep.
As expected, Jay woke up all bewildered, but at least it was early in the morning and he managed to lie down on the couch, to recover at least part of his spine. He saw Erin's bedroom door open and knew that otherwise he would have woken her up to finish what they started, but he chose not to. He shouldn't have done that, not with the mess his life was in, he can already imagine the face his psychologist will make when he hears that his current ex proposed to him and two days later he found himself with his former ex..
As soon as they woke up the next day, neither brought up what they did, both wanted to talk, but they decided to focus on the most important thing, organizing enough things for 6 months.
They spent the whole morning on it and with Tess and Nick's help, which helped even more. Erin's escalade was big enough for all the boxes they needed, and the friends promised to take the rest with them on their way to the 4-year-old girl's birthday that was coming up soon.
Erin who started at the wheel. The trip was long, they started in the early afternoon and they were planning to arrive in the early morning, which wasn't so bad. They were even doing very well, they thought they wouldn't be able to leave on time, but the fact that she was staying with Hank helped when choosing what to take and what to leave behind.
They started singing songs with the girl, Jay was starting to get introduced to these children's songs that stick in the mind.
Charlotte was reasonably quiet for a child her age, bathroom stops weren't as many as they thought they would be, she didn't complain at any point, entertained with toys, music and movies, as well as talking a lot with Jay and Erin. As for Jay and Erin, they talked about everything but the elephant in the room and so far they were fine with that.
- We can stop for dinner, I'll take that ending, so you can rest for tomorrow. - Jay says after 9 hours in the car. It was almost midnight and they had another 3 hours of travel ahead of them, Charlotte had slept late and woke up hungry, so Erin agreed, because she was already getting tired.
The three enter the gas station restaurant together, Charlotte in Jay's arms and Erin walking in front of them. They soon settle down and the waitress approaches. They made their requests and Charlotte slept after eating, the couple decided to spend a little more time resting, because when Jay started driving, his intention would be to stop only when they were stopped at Voight's house. They head to the register to pay when the waitress approaches them.
- This is a gift we give to children... - the waitress says looking at a sleeping Charlotte in Jay's arms. -Your daughter is beautiful, much like her father ...-she flirts blatantly and that catches Lindsay's attention, she had noticed the looks before, but was amazed at the woman's courage to hit on him even accompanied.
- You think? - Jay starts and pulls Erin putting his arms on her shoulders. - I don't think so, she's beautiful like her mother, my wife... - Erin's heart probably stopped and missed the beats, she was only alive to see the offeror's disgusted face and standing because Jay held her by the shoulders , because her legs were wobbly.
After the embarrassing situation, the waitress smiled awkwardly and left. They paid for what they consumed, for what they bought for the rest of the trip and for the gas they put in. Neither of them said anything until Jay put Charlotte in the car seat. The girl didn't even move and Jay closed the door once she was safe.
- Your wife? - says at the passenger door smiling provocatively, Jay sighs relieved, she wasn't angry.
- She needed to put herself in her place, lack of respect, hitting on someone who was with the family, me huh.
- You know we're not a family, you didn't have to do that, besides, you don't owe me anything. - start.
- I know, but she didn't know, it was disrespectful. - says and Erin nods.
Jay walks over and Erin snorts, why did he always have to press her somewhere? She was lucky she got a checkup at the hospital, because Jay was leaving his wife with heart problems this weekend.
- Sorry about yesterday, I...
- I don't remember you pointing a gun at me. -she starts holding his muscular arms. - In fact, if I remember correctly I was very interested in the gun you were pointing at me...
"Erin..." he groans at the provocation.
- Listen, we're adults, we act on impulse, but I don't regret it.
- Me neither.
- But we can not.
- We're adults, we can do whatever we want...
- We shouldn't, you know that. - she says and he agrees.
- I know, I don't want you to think I'm using you..
- You heard something I said or noticed something yesterday, because I don't remember telling you to stop or feeling used, in fact, I remember very well me begging you to use me.
- You're not helping. - He puts his hand on top of her head leaning against the car and closes his eyes.
- Sorry, I'm sexually frustrated. - murmurs.
- I understand you. - Jay says and leans over pulling her for a kiss, unlike the day before this one is slow, it's calm and smooth. Jay's hand slides to Erin's neck and it takes everything in her not to escalate.
-Let's stop...-he asks, still kissing him.
- Yeah, we shouldn't do that anymore. - he says and soon unites his lips again.
- You know, I really appreciate my daughter right now, because if not, I would be riding you right now in the backseat on the side of the road.
- Damn, Erin... - Jay grumbles and then moves his pants, she was doing it on purpose.
After they both calm down, Jay recovers and faces her.
- We're not going to do that, are we? - She looks at him seriously, he didn't need her to explain, he knew what she wanted to say.
- As much as I want to, it's not right, we're not teenagers, it's not just our life and...
- Hey... it's okay. - she approaches him. - I know what you're feeling, but we must be rational here, I don't know what happened this weekend, but let's be professional, my rule is no relationships at work... - she teases. - It's only six months, let's not complicate things, there's Charlotte and...
- Let's not complicate things. - He accept. - Friends? -she asks extending her hand.
- Friends. - she smiles at him.
- And stop teasing me or I won't answer for myself. - jokes opening the passenger door for her and running to finish the trip.
Erin had a problem, Chicago was chaos, it was her chaos. Always when she was away she was fine, but it was when she put her foot that things went wrong. Jay dropped her off at home with the girl and she asked her to use his car until they went to the airport to pick up his the next morning.
A lot of new things happened for the first day, it was like their weekend, everything was going great until reality hit them. Both letting themselves be carried away by sexual desire afraid to be honest about their feelings, it would hurt each other and themselves, they wanted to say more the night before, but making an agreement to just be friends was enough for the moment, but the What really bothered Erin was the conversation with Hailey.
- We're getting married... - and that's when everything she experienced that weekend with Jay collapsed.
"And just when we think we have a handle on the rules... something happens... that changes the whole game."
- Grey's Anatomy