Eight weeks, just short of two earthly months; that's how long it had taken to bring their favorite, best, and most annoying scientist home: from his nightmare, from the pain, from the darkness and loneliness. It was a picture John was sure he would never forget for his entire life, he vividly remembered being in an Iraqi prison, for John this had almost been worse.

John slowly walked through the damp halls, never sure if he was stepping through a puddle or someone's blood. The walls were lined with cells. Blood, urine, vomit assaulted his nose as he tried not to turn and run away, he was half afraid of what he might find. Teyla and Ronan, along with AR-2, AR-4 and AR-12 were taking down the rest of the Genii, Major Lorne was several feet behind John.

He stepped through another puddle and over to one of the bars, a single form was curled tightly into a ball in the far corner. John could only guess how bad he was, but he knew instantly it had to be Rodney, he could just barely make out the black and blue of Rodney's uniform. Moving forward he gripped the bars and pulled at the door. It slipped open to the left.

"Lorne, watch our sixes okay," John whispered, he stepped into the cell, his already alerted senses rebelled at the strong smell of urine and vomit. He gulped back the bile that had risen in his throat and stepped over to the man in the corner. "Roddy, it's me Johnny," he whispered.

He heard the soft sobbing, reaching out with a tentative hand, and gently touched Rodney's shoulder. What had once been a muscled shoulder, was now bone skinny, he could feel the shoulder blades and the clavicle as he turned the man. Blood shot blue eyes turned up towards him, the hair was matted down with sweat and blood, his face covered in dirt and what John could easily assume was regurgitation. Tear tracks were streaming down the dirt caked face.

"Joh…" he whimpered.

"Hey buddy, I'm here," not bothering to worry about the dirt around him, or anything else for that matter he pulled Rodney into his arms. Rodney instantly clung to John as if there was no tomorrow. What had once been a strong healthy body, was no sickly, his fat gone, he was now bordering anorexic skinny. His once pale face was now almost gray, marred by bruises. He buried his face in his brother's shoulder, sobbing his heart out. John sighed and pulled him closer, leg on either side of the man, John cradled his younger brother in his arms, he lifted his hand to Rodney's head and began to caress the back of the man's neck.

"I'm here Rodney, I'm right here. We're taking you home buddy," he whispered. Silently vowing to never let his brother out of his sight for at least a year.

"Major, radio in Teyla, quietly, let her know I've found him, then come in here and help me get him out of here," John called softly.

Moments later Major Lorne entered the cell. "What can I do to help sir?" Lorne asked.

"Protect us," that was all he said, John reached under Rodney's knees and behind his shoulders and lifted Rodney from the floor, disheartened by how easy it seemed to lift the man into his arms. Rodney's head flopped against John's chest as he whimpered in pain. "I got ya buddy, breathe easy pal," John took a step, testing out his own legs.

Major Lorne, John and Rodney headed for the gate. It took a nearly forty minute hike, two men from Atlantis were still guarding the gate when John reached it, He looked back, still holding Rodney in his arms. Teyla and the rest of her team came running from the woods.

"Dial!" John yelled.

That had been four days ago, now John sat by Rodney's side, holding his good hand, as he quietly spoke to Rodney, waiting for the wayward scientist to wake up.

John sighed and shook his head, it was amazing what Rodney could endure, anyone who said this scientist was weak was out of their mind. Upon examination he had suffered: a sprained ankle, a fractured tibia, a bruised kidney, an enlarged spleen, four broken ribs, two fractured ribs, a punctured lung, a snapped clavicle, a dislocated shoulder, two broken fingers on his left hand, a severe concussion, and a multitude of bumps, bruises, contusions, and scrapes. He was in rough shape, but what Carson and John worried about the most was his mental state.

The Genii had done quite a job on him, but John worried they would ever be able to get the scientist back to the arrogant man he had once been. John could remember coming home from nearly ever mission disheartened and terrified for Rodney's sake. Elizabeth hadn't lost hope, more than once she had gone up against Colonel Caldwell to keep the man from announcing Rodney MIA and to stop all searches for him.

John had never felt so helpless in his entire life as the day he had woken up only to hear they had lost Rodney, he wanted nothing more than to hold his brother forever, and let him know that he was safe again.

"Rodney, I know you can hear me buddy, Rod you've gotta wake up pal…"

"He'll wake up when his body is done healing itself," Carson's thick brogue interrupted John's thoughts.

"I know, that whole your mind shuts down to fix your body thing," John said smiling.

"Aye, something like that lad. Maybe you should go get some sleep…"

"I spent three weeks resting and another two months looking for him…I'm not quite ready to let go now that we've found him. He could have died, and for whatever reason he's very much alive and still here."

"Someone or something is watchin' over him," whispered Carson.

"Carson, he is going to wake up…right?"

"I couldn't be led to believe otherwise John, Rodney is too stubborn to let someone like Koyla destroy him now, after all we've been through. If he was that weak he would have died a long time ago."

"Why is it always him?" whispered John as he looked at Rodney's sleeping face.

"Wish I knew lad, wish I knew…although I'm fairly sure he'd prefer to be on that bed than to be in your seat waiting for his brother to wake up."

"I know…" John sighed and shook his head, this seemed to be happening to them all too often now.

"I'll be in me office if ya need me lad," Carson headed out of the room.

John sighed again and smiled softly "What is it about you that makes you…you? Everyone hated you, you could drive a damn saint up the wall…hell you could probably drive God himself up a wall…but suddenly the minute you get hurt everyone cares, everyone's concerned. You realize how needed you are, not just physically, but I mean really needed; your Elizabeth's shoulder, my sanity, and you help Carson keep his medical skills up to par. Although we do need you around here, it's been way too quiet without you these past few months…Lauryn is beside herself, having not seen her daddy in a long time. She misses you…Caldwell wanted to send her state side…I told him as the child's Godfather and uncle I had the call before he did…"

"I…I think I…have the ver…y first di….bs," came the raspy voice from the bed.

John smiled as he looked down on two sets over ocean blue eyes. "Nice to have you back among the land of the living," John grinned as he grasped his younger brother's hand.

"Where?" he mumbled.

"We're on Atlantis Rodney, you're home and you're safe," John promised.

"Koyla?" Rodney asked suddenly looking around with fear evident in his blue eyes.

"He's…gone Rodney, he's not here, I promise your safe," John repeated.

However, this didn't seem to stop the scientist, as the man's breath began to hitch, "CARSON!" John called, recognizing the beginning's of what was probably a panic attack.

"Breathe Rod," cried John as he helped his brother sit up and rubbed his back.

"What happened?" Carson asked as he hurried over to the bed, he was stunned to see Rodney was not only awake, but in the midst of a panic attack.

"I'll get him some sedatives, let him know you're here," Carson said hurriedly.

John quickly tossed off his shoes and climbed up onto the bed, within seconds, his arms were carefully placed around his brother's shoulders, hugging and holding him as Rodney tried to get a hold of his air again.

"Shh, you're afe," John whispered running his hand through Rodney's hair, like their mother had whne they were young after nightmares.

"I…saw…I saw you….you died…" cried Rodney as he grasped to his brother firmly, gripping his brother around the waist and holding on for dear life.

"I'm right here Rodney, we're okay," John continued to croon, rubbing his brother's back soothingly.

Carson came over, a needle in hand, and if things couldn't have possibly gotten worse, they did. Rodney began to fight John and Carson, trying to get away from the needle.

"Hold him still," hissed Carson.

"I can't…"

"He's going to break hurt himself further!" growled Carson.

Rodney cried out as the needle slipped into his arm, and at last he collapsed against his brother, not unconscious, sobbing into the man's shoulder.

"What did they do to you?" whispered John as he looked at Carson, fear written all over his face.

It was dark when Rodney opened his eyes again, calmer this time, blue eyes too sluggish to be darting around. Two hazel green eyes met his in a soft smile, "hey buddy," John said gently taking his brother's hand.

"Home?"

"Yeah, you're home, how do you feel?" John asked gently.

"Like I was run over by a truck…you…you okay?"

"Me? Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" joked John forcing a smile to his face.

"Cave in…saw you…"

"Oh…yeah I'm just fine, we got lucky this time…Rod, do you remember…anything?"

"Uh…vaguely…" lied Rodney.

"Right, well, Carson says you'll be out of here by the end of next week, so lets just focus on getting you better," smiled John gently.

"Sounds like a plan to me…" mumbled Rodney as he closed his eyes again and allowed himself to slip back into a light slumber

Two weeks didn't go fast enough, for anyone, Rodney, John or Carson and his staff. But finally Friday of the next week arrived, and Rodney had done remarkably well in healing quickly, at least in a physical sense. If he was hurting, he was certainly hiding it well from everyone, including John.

"Hey," came a soft voice from behind him, turning Rodney grinned lightly at the sight of Elizabeth, she had visited him several times over the past two weeks. He looked back out at the ocean, he knew what they wanted, everyone wanted to hear what had happened to him, if he was really okay, what he needed. All Rodney wanted to do was forget it had even happened.

"Elizabeth," he whispered.

"It's good to see you up and about, John said you might be out here," she whispered lightly as she came to stand by his side.

"Yeah…I missed this," he murmured, pangs of memories coming back to haunt him.

"I don't want you to think we're trying to attack you…"

"I don't want to see Heightmeyer.."

"Rodney, she can help…"

"No…I can talk to John, or Carson or someone, I…I can't tell her."

"Why?"

"Because no matter how trained she is, no matter what she's heard she won't understand. She'll feel pity, I know John and Carson won't pity me, or feel sorry."

"We don't pity you, we feel bad that you had to go through what you did, but we just want to help you."

"Please Elizabeth…it's going to be hard enough trying to tell John or Carson, but please let me do this in my own time."

She looked down at her hands, her heart told her this was a good idea, to let Rodney figure it out on his own, let him seek the help, but her mind told her he needed something more. "All right, I've giving you guys a month of as it is, we've all been through a bit of trauma between the cave in and your kidnapping. I want you to know we're all here for you, even if you don't say anything, I'm willing to just sit with you… Or even sit for you," she said smiling.

"Yeah…I know, thanks Liz," he replied smiling softly.

"Goodnight Rodney."

"Goodnight Elizabeth," he returned as he watched her head back inside, part of him wanted to scream for her help, to beg for her to come back and hold him, to listen to what he had to say, what he had gone through, but another part knew he had to deal with this on his own.

He sighed as he just stared back out at the water, how much had he missed this place. He didn't have the heart to tell them all the truth, that for the first good month and two weeks he had been totally and completely coherent. Koyla had planned it that way, everyday beating Rodney just to the point of oblivion before leaving him alone just long enough to wonder when someone, anybody would come and care for him, tell him he was still worth something to someone.

Those had been very lonely weeks, when Rodney was aware of almost every passing moment, aware that his brother could very well be dead, that his friends had no idea where he was or how to find him. Closing his eyes he tried to erase the images from his mind, there was a lot to take care of, a lot to do.

But for now, he would just let the wind blow through his softy hair, past his chilled cheeks and take in the moment of being home.

"What is this?" Elizabeth questioned looking down at the paper Rodney had just handed her. He had only been home for about four weeks, he was showing amazing improvement, but there was something he was hiding.

"It's a request for leave…"

"You just got back," she commented, not meaning for it to sound the way it did.

"I want to go back to earth…for a while."

"How long?"

"I don't know yet."

"Rodney, we need you here, I'm not going to accept you just walking out on Atlantis and not coming back."

"It won't be like that…I just need some time Elizabeth."

"That's the part I have trouble with, Rodney I already told you that you guys all have a month…"

"It's going to take longer than a month to recover from being kidnapped for two months!" He growled, his mind suddenly returned to him as he looked down at the floor, "Please Elizabeth…I can't stay here right now…"

"Rodney…"

"I'll go with him Elizabeth," came John's voice from behind them. He stepped forward and tossed an identical sheet on her desk next to Rodney's.

She looked between the two men and shook her head, "no, I can't. I need you both…"

"Elizabeth," came Carson's voice, "I'm ordering all three of us indefinite leave…"

"Now wait a damn minute there is now way I can run this city without my three chiefs of staff. How do you plan on me survive without the three of you? Incase you haven't noticed I can't exactly run this place without you!"

"Elizabeth, for once this isn't going to be argued…Rodney needs a chance to get past what has happened…he needs someone to be there for him, and John needs to go home with him to help him get through this. And I need to go so I can monitor their conditions. Elizabeth it may be the only way for any of us to ever be able to get back to normal."

Elizabeth looked down at the desk and sighed, "All right, I will grant you all the leave, but try not to take too long, Caldwell will be all to happy to know you've left. And take care of yourselves," she said eyeing her three best friends.

"Elizabeth…" Rodney stopped.

Standing she walked around her desk to him and instantly pulled him into a tight hug, "you take care of yourself okay, I want you back. I didn't spend two months worrying my ass off about you to lose you again," pulling away she pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"I…" he stopped and smiled, reaching out he gently caressed his cheek, "thank you," he whispered pressing a kiss to her cheek in return.

"Take care of each other."

They wasted no time, the wormhole engaged and they stepped through the event horizon. Elizabeth watched with Teyla by her side, "you fear for him?" Teyla questioned.

"I fear every time I watch them step through that wormhole…don't you?"

"It is impossible not to worry about those you love."

"I didn't say anything out loving him."

"But you do?"

"Yes…I do."

"Welcome home," came Samantha Carter's voice as she smiled over at them gently.

"Hi Sam," Rodney said accepting the gentle hug, returning it with little enthusiasm.

John looked around and smiled as he and Carson stepped in behind their friend. Sam nodded softly, "we've reserved a hotel for you guys tonight, and anything you else can be set up within minutes…"

"Actually ma'am…" John began, "we're going to go without help from the Air Force, we've all got some stuff to do."

"Very well, let us know if you need anything," Sam replied smiling gently.

"I feel like a burden," came Rodney's quiet voice from the large bed in the hotel room. He was spread out on the bed closest to the bathroom. Carson was sitting under a light in a nice chair reading quietly, while John finished getting ready for bed.

"You're not Rodney," came Carson's simply reply.

"Oh yeah, Elizabeth didn't even want to let us go, do you realize how helpless I feel right now. I can't even sleep…" mumbled Rodney.

"Rod, for once in your life, please just ask us for help, that's why we're here. And I don't just mean that's why Carson and I are here, that's why we're on earth. It's time we all took a break, relaxed from the world around us. It's going to hurt for awhile, we're here to help you through the hurt."

"By invading your mother's home, your wife's life and my sister's family?"

"By surrounding you with all the things in the world you can want and love."

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know Elizabeth and Lauryn would be here," he joked.

Carson smiled at John, if Rodney was starting to joke again then he was doing better.

"John…what happened?" Rodney asked suddenly.

"What do you mean?" John asked sitting down on the second bed.

"I mean what happened, the last thing I remember was seeing a cave in, we thought you were dead for sure."

"Everyone else thought it too…" replied John quietly.

"Get them out of there!" Elizabeth called frantically as she watched the her men and women begin to pull the rocks away, "where is Carson…"

"Right here lass," came a grumble from behind her.

"My God what happened!" she asked as she rushed over to his side looking at him.

"I got…hit with a dart…Rodney is gone, I'm sorry Elizabeth."

"Teyla, take two men with you and go search everywhere! Threaten the king if you have to, I won't lose my two best men over him."

Teyla simply nodded and hurried off. Elizabeth watched then turned back to the mines, she covered her mouth, surveying the area, Carson looked terrible. "Carson…this isn't your fault," she whispered.

"Aye, you say it, but right now your mind doesn't believe it," mumbled Carson.

"We'll find him," she said gently gripping his hand.

"Obviously they got you out…Carson this wasn't your fault," Rodney said suddenly.

Carson nodded as he sat down on the third cot in the room and looked at his two best friends, the three of them made quite a group, they're friend was different, unheard of, and special, "Aye, I know that now lad, but I'll always feel bad, I was supposed to care for ya."

"I'm safe now," whispered Rodney.

"Aye safe as long as your mind isn't sleeping."

"What happened Rodney?" John asked, unsure how else to approach the subject.

Rodney sighed and shrugged, "a lot of it was just desire to gain revenge against us, a lot of it was just beating me to get his jollies."

"I'm sorry Rodney."

"He told me you guys wouldn't come…and for awhile I knew he was lying, for a long time…but then I started to wonder, I started to have doubts, and that's when he started causing more damage."

John came over and sat beside his brother, "we did come, we did find you and you are safe here."

"Thank you guys," Rodney replied.

"That's what brothers are for," Carson whispered.