This is a shorter chapter than I usually write but I wanted the cliff hanger at the end Please know I have already started the next chapter

* As always your opinions are most welcome, and Diana Gabaldon is the creator/owner of Outlander.

Thanks for reading!

Claire POV

March 1746

I was sitting in bed one morning thinking. About 3:30am that morning I'd awoken to see Jamie walk in our bedroom and stand over the twins. When I said his name he was startled and ran. Like an animal. Like a wild thing.

I cried until I couldn't cry anymore. Then I sat until the twins were awake.

Jenny and I were sitting on the front steps on a warm evening later that week. Ian was playing with wee Jamie and Maggie. Katherine was in Jenny's arms and Brianna was in mine. Garia was watching little Murtagh. I told Jenny about what happened and told her how I felt about it.

"He is living in a cave and living wild Claire." Jenny whispered back.

"Yes, I understand, but not to stay long enough to hold his children… you know that's not like him." I replied while kissing Brianna's hand in a fashion like I was eating her hand. Brianna's laugh rang loud for her age, it was beautiful.

"I see ye're point." Jenny sighed and stroked Katherine's hair. "I dinna ken whit we can do about it. He is alive, and we ken it, we have to be grateful for that. We've had this conversation before, there is no way ye can safely travel." Jenny said and shook her head.

"Travel…" I whispered and wondered if there was any possible way to take Jamie through the rocks. I took Roger. Jenny watched me for a moment… then let out a small gasp.

"I thought Jamie couldna… ye know!" Jenny whispered back and looked at me.

"No, not the way I can… but maybe there is another way." I told Jenny. I worried my lower lip until she replied and startled me.

"We need to think about this, I will talk to Ian." Jenny said back. I looked at her and nodded, seeing Robina looking at us. She was folding the laundry from the line and looking back at us.

"What's wrong with Robina?" I asked Jenny in a regular voice. Jenny looked at me and smirked.

"She agreed to marry one of the Galley boys and she's nervous to tell me she wants to quit her job." Jenny smiled a bit.

"You're awful," I said jokingly and leaned on Jenny a bit, "Why don't you just let the girl off the hook?" I said back, laughing at the situation.

Jenny was laughing now too and pushed on me, "Because she has become so squeaky about getting married, I want her to tell me herself."

Jenny and I spent a pleasurable evening talking and laughing on the steps. We both had Jamie in our thoughts, but we pushed him to the back of our minds, to be thought about later.

Unbeknownst to me the object of that large spot in the back of our minds was in a tree about a quarter of a mile away. He watched us until we went inside because it was time to put the children down for the night. Jamie was happy that Claire could smile and laugh without him but he missed her so much his heart ached. Happy, he told himself. Tears ran down his cheek and hit his hands.

Surprise inspections by the English continued into the Summer that year and Ian was taken with them when they left in early June. Jenny and I rode for hours that night to find where they'd taken him. We had stopped when we saw a clearing up ahead where camp had been made and Ian was sleeping in the cage-like apparatus they'd put him in. We took the horses back a safe distance and walked back to the camp.

"Go on, see what can be done to get him out and I will stand guard." I said to Jenny. Strong capable Jenny had been out of sorts when they'd taken Ian.

"Whit do ye mean?" Jenny whispered back.

"Get on your hands and knees and go talk to your husband to find out what he thinks about escape. I have knives here, I will keep a watch out." I responded.

Jenny found her Jenny face, that look that would murder the person who hurt her family and she went. I kept watch but no one moved. The soldiers were at their ease compared to before Culloden.

It wasn't long before Jenny came back and she looked better.

"He says no, to go home." Jenny said.

"What?!" I replied, astonished.

"They dinna have murder planned, just push him to see if he will give up Jamie. Ian said for us to go home and hire men to patrol for him in a few days when they give up because they already took his wooden leg." Jenny replied and already started to leave. I saw red for a minute, and it wasn't from a coat. I really wanted to hurt the men who'd turned my Jamie and likely Murtagh into wild things just so they could feel safe .

"Jenny,' I whispered.

"Claire, I willna disobey my husband now." Jenny said and waved.

"No, I have food to give him. I will be right behind you." I said.

I crawled up to Ian's… cage (because that was the best word for it) and promised him I would take Jenny home and stay home myself. I gave him the whiskey to drink and pulled out all the food I had with me.

"I'm so sorry Ian." I whispered.

"It won't be too bad, and I am braw thanks to you." He held up his arms a bit which were strong. "I can take it. Now off with ye Claire." Ian nodded to me and I left.

Jenny was waiting for me. "What?"

"I just gave him the food and whiskey I had." I told her.

"Good, good plan." Jenny nodded and we set off for the mile walk on the horses.

When we got home we released Garia and Robina (because she hadn't found the courage yet and the wedding was in two months) from duty to go to bed after talking to the girls and getting their approval to stay at Lallybroch for a while. Jenny sent one of the stable lads to each of their homes with a message for their folk that they would be needed for a week and they would be paid accordingly.

Mrs. Crook and Mrs. Macnab had made some biscuits and tea and called for Jenny and I to come to the kitchen. They were sitting at the table, but stood and nodded to each of us.

"What's the plan, Mistress Murray?" Mrs. Macnab asked.

The four of us sat down and talked. Jenny and I gave them the facts and the plan we'd come up with riding home. Mrs. Crook and Mrs. Macnab were clear on their parts and made plans for more food. They also gave suggestions for extra riders to find Ian in two days' time.

The third day since Ian had been taken saw Jenny standing in the dooryard scanning the sky for black smoke. The person who found Ian would make a fire and send black smoke to the sky to signal Ian had been found. Jenny wasn't paying the riders, they'd all volunteered and just asked for food and a horse.

"Claire!" Jenny yelled for me, seeing black smoke in the sky. Jenny got on a horse and basically flew. I ran inside to get medical supplies ready.

Ian was found quickly, which meant the wounds were still fresh when Jenny got him to my table. I bound the two broken ribs, set his broken finger, cleaned and stitched up the cuts on his chest and arms.

"Thank ye Claire, I'm going to check the fields." Ian said and started to stand.

Jenny got the one other person out of the room before she started on him, but I wished I had left also.

"Look ye here man, I've taken care of the fields and all ye chores. Ye will stay put till ye heal." Jenny was very firm.

"Are ye going to give me ye're mending basket so I can stay in the house all day?" Ian said back.

I was able to tiptoe out of the room.

"All day?!" Jenny's voice was still heard through the walls. "You'll be in the house all week!"

September 1746

"I collected as much information as I could find about this type of travel before I came back and it amounted to 3 small books. It seems like it might be possible." I whispered to Jenny. We were supposedly just getting a breath of fresh air.

"Seems like it might?" Jenny repeated back to her. "Sounds risky. I like the idea of them living a normal life but it might be a pipe dream." Jenny said. We walked for a minute before she added, "Ian thinks it is Jamie and Murtagh's decision, but in their shoes he said he would go." She finished and looked in the distance.

"Could I get a message to Jarrod?" I asked.

"In France?" Jenny said.

"Yes, I think I know another traveler, maybe Jarod could make inquiries about where this man is now.. I think he knows more than I do about this." I said.

"Aye, get it written." Jenny said and we headed back to the house.

I wrote what I thought was a clever note; I asked that Jarrod let it be known Madonna is looking for Master Raymond at the apothecary and she can be found at home.

"Madonna?" Jenny said and looked at me.

"It's what he called me." I replied and shrugged, embarrassed.

Jenny went to the village to post the letter. She looked around and wished she'd brought more coin because the residents were in rough shape. She resolved to get me and come back with food and medical supplies. When we got supplies there it took three days to get through all the medical needs.

Jenny was able to keep Ian in the house for four days, and he was let out with a promise that he would take it easy. Later, Jenny had told me it was fine because she was just hoping for three days.

Spring and summer that year had been very busy with planting. All the seeds and money I brought meant this year would be a record harvest and we were well on our way to achieving just that.

At the end of September Jenny, Ian, wee Jamie and I were at the table when Ian excused himself to go over the books for tomorrow. It was quarter day tomorrow and all the tenants were due to bring rent.

"What if we don't collect rents?" Jenny asked Ian.

"What?" Ian said, looking at her.

"No one has them, now do they? What if instead of tryin' to get rents they dinna have, we gave out food?" Jenny said.

Ian looked puzzled. "You could say, you know times are trying and we've reduced our needs and had a good harvest so we don't need to collect it all this quarter." Ian was still looking puzzled but I added, "Or say whatever you want to say." I finished with a practiced flourish. I produced the remaining two bags of coins from my original show of coins to Jenny.

"Nae lass, that's yours, for the children." Ian said.

"No, it's ours. And I think we should use it instead of collecting rent." I said.

"I dinna want our tenants to think we mean to not to take our due." Ian replied. He thought about it… "What if we half it for the quarter, but let it be known next quarter will be normal?" Ian said, happy with a compromise.

Jenny and I looked at each other. I could see it in Jenny's face, I told ye so , she was telling me. Jenny said we should start with asking for none and settle for half.

"I think that's very generous Ian. May we still pass out food?" I asked.

"Of course." Ian nodded and left us.

The nights were lonely. Jamie occasionally stopped in our bedroom when he dropped off animals he had found for food and brought them to the house. He only came in to look at his children. They were growing so rapidly. One night in early October I happened to be awake and rocking Murtagh who was getting over a fever.

"Oh, och." Jamie made the Scottish sound of surprise and put his dirk away.

"Jamie, come in, please don't leave." I got up and was ready to beg if needed.

Jamie had the door half closed, but he stopped. Slowly, ever so slowly he walked back into his bedroom we shared and closed the door.

"Aye." Jamie said and stood there.

"Shush-" I said to little Murtagh and sat down on the rocker. I motioned to one of the blue chairs and Jamie sat.

"Claire, If ye wanna-" Jamie started but I had begun to speak at the same time.

"I may have a way for you to travel through the stones with me. Now you." I said and waited for my message to kick in.

Jamie looked puzzled. He said quietly, "I was going to tell ye if ye wanted to remarry I willna cause a fuss." Jamie was thinking about the possibility.

"James Fraser!" I whispered furiously. "If I wasn't holding our sick son I would strike you! I don't want to remarry-" I said, but it was Jamie's turn to cut me off.

"Sick? What's wrong with our bairn?" Jamie dropped everything he was holding and went to the corner to wash. He took off his coat and shirt then pulled his good shirt out from the drawer and put it on. I saw he was even thinner than before. Jamie came back and took Murtagh from my arms.

"He had an ear infection. It's getting better, but he is still not happy about it." I said and sat in the blue chair pulling my legs up.

"Och now son, ye been causing a kebbie lebbie here?" He continued to make small noises and watched his son fall asleep. Even after all these months of only small touches in the night he could still sooth his son. Jamie looked at Brianna; she liked him less, but he didn't blame her. Jamie smiled.

(Jamie's POV)

I looked back at Claire and she was asleep. I put my son back in his cradle and carried my wife to bed. I walked around the room for a while thinking.

This is my time, how can I leave it? Is it a sin to leave the time God put me? That took a long time to ponder and I eventually concluded it depends on why I would leave my time.. If I went to Claire's time what would be my reason? I looked at my bairns, they would be the first reason. If life continues in this way, they willna ken me when they grow up. I would be their Da even if they didna ken me. Maybe they willna be my first reason. Claire. God gave me that rare woman, and I have to stay away. Before last Christmas I was doing okay coming home at night but when the surprise inspections started I had too many close calls. Too much to risk. Is it right to stay away from her if there is a chance I can be her husband again?

Would I go to Claire's time…?