Chapter 607

That Is MY Fault

Savannah wasn't pleased Young Allison was up so late. She came all the way from Palmdale to see them. She was happy to see Young Allison, but the middle of the night wasn't the right time. Not obtaining her mother's permission first was also wrong.

She wondered what else motivated Young Allison to take such a bold action on her own so late at night. She knew Young Allison followed all of the action from her bunker in Palmdale. There must have been something specific which caused her to react in such a way. It made her wonder if her situation was more perilous than she actually thought it was.

Savannah opened the door to her room for Young Allison.

Young Allison was pleased to be in Savannah's room again.

"I remember your room." Young Allison said. "I don't get to see it enough."

Young Allison took a moment to look around the room. It was done for a very specific reason. She could see there was room for some of her things there. She decided not to mention it, yet. She didn't have a lot of personal belongings, but she did have a lot more than Savannah did. Savannah had more than the girls from the future did. She understood possessions were a liability in the future. Allison told her how she saw people die trying to get their 'things'.

She knew there was an empty room on each side of Savannah's room. One was for Young Jesse, and one was for her. She knew Savannah and Young Jesse carried on a long distance relationship. She didn't see it as a problem. She would be the one to share with Savannah the most often. It was just a matter of time. Since she planned to do everything Savannah did, she figured she would probably be in Young Jesse's room at times as well.

She didn't need to look any farther than Vanna, Jesse, and Allison to see how it all played out. There was plenty of love for everyone. There were also the Metal girls. There was one for each of them, and they all shared. Now Anna was her Terminator guardian. She understood where it would lead one day as well. She knew it wouldn't happen until she was with Savannah first. If she jumped the gun and tried to force the issue with Anna, or any of the female Terminators, it would lead to their deactivation by Cameron. It was something they all made quite clear to her in case she 'ordered' them to share with her.

Young Allison knew Savannah was active with all the girls, including her older self, 'Allison', all of them. She didn't have a problem with it. The only one which bothered her a little was her mother. She knew it was mostly in the future so she could understand it, sort of. She was sure there were a few times in the present where Savannah was with Allison and then her mother, later on. It really made her wonder where she would fit in at.

Cammy was Savannah's Terminator lover. She knew she shared with her almost every night. She was a little concerned there wouldn't be any mystery or excitement when Savannah shared with her. She would know what everything was like in every way. With the older versions of her, she also knew how she would respond. They may not all respond the same way as she would individually, but collectively, she believed everything would be covered already. She felt she would need to start out at a big disadvantage. She did plan to start out anyway. She loved Savannah dearly.

Savannah could see Young Allison was lost in thought. She could only imagine about what. She was her age once too and she needed a 'friend' bad, real bad. She knew she was going to be Young Allison's 'friend'. She knew the only thing holding it back was her. She didn't want to complicate Young Allison's life more than it needed to be.

Maybe she really didn't want to complicate her life. They would need to establish from the beginning, before anything actually started, how the relationship would work. She wanted the relationship to be 'open' the same way it was for Vanna and Allison. She didn't want to give up what she already experienced. At the same time, she was already jealous of anyone else who would touch Young Allison. She knew it needed to be a two way street or it would never work.

She needed to refocus. Young Allison asked her about her room.

"My room is very simple." Savannah said. "The people here grew up with very few material things, or their lifestyle prevented them from having many, if any."

Young Allison understood it and why. Allison told her how it was in the future. It was cruel, mean, and ugly. People needed to move all the time. They often needed to leave everything behind.

"I've been taught the same thing." Young Allison said.

Savannah looked Young Allison over. She could see how beautiful she was. It was clear she fixed herself up some before they left. She didn't think her natural beauty needed very much to make it even more beautiful.

"Did you bring extra clothes?" Savannah asked. "I see you have a small backpack."

Young Allison kept her backpack close. She'd brought everything she thought she might need.

"Yes." Young Allison said. "Anna said I could spend the night here."

Savannah thought some things were important, especially when it came to mothers. She didn't have one anymore and hadn't for a long time. Cameron, Sarah, Vanna, Allison, and Jesse all did what they could for her. She was a mother too. She needed to leave her two daughters with other versions of herself who were sterile. They were in two different futures. It still hurt her, even if her children were their children too. Some rules needed to be followed.

"Did she ask your mother first?" Savannah asked. "Did you?"

Young Allison hoped to sneak away. She hoped Hanna would keep her mother 'busy', but Anna insisted Hanna or Holly accompany them. Allison didn't seem well so Holly needed to stay with her. The bottom line was she didn't ask or even tell her mother. She tried to pull a fast one and didn't make it.

"No." Young Allison said. "I got busted within the first hour."

Young Allison couldn't help but think about the dual meaning of her statement. She was outside John's room within the first hour of leaving home. If he would have invited her into his room, she really could have been 'busted'. It was something she was willing to try, at least a few times, even if she didn't develop a taste for it.

Savannah wanted some rules. They were very simple.

"You won't do it again." Savannah said. "It was wrong. You know better than that. I want you to do the right things because they are right, not because you think you need to. There's a big difference there. I know some of the things I do might be morally questionable to others. If everyone has a choice and free will, I don't think it's a problem."

Young Allison did know what was right. She cut a corner, a big one.

"I'm sorry." Young Allison said.

Savannah understood the worry Claire felt on about four different levels. A group of very scary robots from the future wanted her daughters, all of them.

"You need to tell your mother the same thing." Savannah said. "You need to mean it when you tell her. If you don't mean something when you say it, then you shouldn't say it. You know all these things. You know the difference between right and wrong."

Young Allison didn't mean to upset or hurt her mother. She could see she hurt more than her mother. She also hurt Savannah. Savannah loved her and believed in her. It was the same way she felt about Savannah. She needed to follow Savannah's guidance more than Cameron's when it came to morals and scruples.

"I will." Young Allison said. "I promise, Savannah."

Savannah was satisfied the business was taken care of. Now it was time to talk about her things.

"I have my dresser, a desk, and a computer. It goes through John Henry. Everything is monitored for safety. I'm allowed to view anything I want, regardless of the subject matter. You know what I mean." Savannah said. "I have some books and my clothes in my closet. There's an arms locker with weapons and vests."

Savannah could see Young Allison did know what she meant about what she could view. It was one of the reasons why she didn't mention the biggest thing in her room. It was her bed.

Young Allison moved to the desk to look at something. She was intrigued at what she thought she spotted.

"What are all the diagrams and notes for?" Young Allison asked. "They look like what I do to plan or review every mission you go on."

Savannah reviewed all the Resistance operations. She tried to see what was planned. What went right, and what went wrong. Her goal was to be able to lead missions and have them come out a success. She didn't want any deaths or terminations of her force either. She knew at some point it would be inevitable. She intended to keep the point as far away as possible.

"They are. I go over every mission or raid we conduct, or plan to conduct. Many unfold as they happen. We need to improvise and adapt to the unknown." Savannah said. "I always like to see what I could've done better to help the team or make things safer. I especially try to see what could have been done differently in the moment when there was no time to plan. I know it's hindsight, but it may make a difference the next time. There will always be another next time."

Savannah wanted to know how to prevent Cameron from getting damaged as much. It was something which really bothered her. Maybe it was because she understood how Cameron felt about being damaged. She always tried to be there for Cameron when she was damaged to show her she loved her just as much, even when she was damaged. She loved Cameron, not just her appearance. Vanna loved Cameron when she was a program in a metal box. She knew she would feel the same way. She hoped it would never come to a similar situation, for similar reasons.

Young Allison understood the reasoning. She wanted to switch to a lighter note.

"Can I look at your clothes?" Young Allison asked. "I've seen some nice outfits. Cameron says she has some nice things I can wear someday soon."

Savannah knew where the statement was headed. It was hanging on the back of her door the night after Cameron and John were married. She also wanted to make something else clear.

"Yes, you may look at anything I have." Savannah said. "What is mine is yours. I will share everything with you, no matter what it is."

They both knew the implications of it in the future. They didn't know the future was a lot closer than either of them imagined.

Young Allison looked at the outfits.

"These are all beautiful." Young Allison said.

Savannah didn't go shopping much. It was always with Cameron if she did.

"Cameron picked all of them out for me." Savannah said.

Young Allison looked down at her outfit. It showed a lot, even if she didn't think there was a lot to show. There was, it was just a matter of perspective. Cameron purchased all her clothes for her too.

"She's very talented." Young Allison said.

Young Allison touched the wedding dress.

"This is the dress…." Young Allison said.

Savannah knew it was the only thing Young Allison really wanted to look at and touch.

"It's what you really wanted to see." Savannah said.

Young Allison blushed a little. She was ready for everything it represented. She was nervous and worried about it too.

"Yes." Young Allison said. "You know why…."

Savannah did know why. She almost bypassed the dress and was with John. The dress wasn't necessary. It was more symbolic. She was a little worried too how she would do. All of her experience was with females. Everyone of them told her a female could satisfy a female better than a male.

"I really don't know what the future will bring for me." Savannah said. "Or you."

Young Allison looked at the dress and at the bed. It would happen at some point.

"I do." Young Allison said. "The 'Natural Order' is inevitable."

Savannah didn't want to deal with Cameron's 'handy work'. The clock was running down and she promised Claire that Young Allison would be in bed soon. She intended to keep her promise. She also figured there was another issue which needed to be dealt with.

"Why don't you clean up and get ready for bed first." Savannah said. "I need to do something real quick."

Savannah went outside her room. Anna stood there like a sentinel.

"Are you going to spend the rest of the night standing out here?" Savannah asked.

Anna felt it was her duty. Young Allison was her charge.

"Yes." Anna said. "I can also come in and go into 'Standby'."

Savannah saw it all differently.

"Check your 'Savannah' programming." Savannah said.

Anna shared the 'Neural Interface' with Savannah.

"I know you're honest and loving." Anna said. "I know you care and respect her. I know you're honorable."

Savannah thought the revelation should be self evident. She didn't want Young Allison to 'grow up' too fast. She felt most of it fell on her shoulders to prevent it.

"Then you know you don't need to be here tonight." Savannah said. "Go hang out with Cameron and work on stealing Young Allison's youth from her another time. You won't get my help to do it. I'll never do it to her. She needs to be ready first, not just think she is ready."

Anna didn't want Savannah to forget the bigger picture.

"The future waits for Nobody." Anna said.

Savannah risked her life more and more to prevent such a future and Skynet control.

"THAT future isn't here yet." Savannah said. "We change it everyday. I risk my life to delay it. I'm not sure what will happen going forward."

Anna could see staying around outside the door would be a problem. She still needed to perform her job.

"I'll come back in the morning." Anna said. "You know it is my function to protect her."

Savannah felt the same way if not more so. She knew what it was like to lose everything. She knew what it was like to have others control your life. She also knew what it was like to stand tall.

"It's my function to protect her as well." Savannah said. "I'll never allow harm to come to her. I'll never make choices for her either."

Anna could see the determination. It was honest and pure. It was what Cameron wanted for a leader.

"You truly are the 'Chosen One'." Anna said.

Savannah was always worried about the title.

"For now maybe, some think it. I don't agree with it. We all know Young Allison will be the true 'Chosen One'." Savannah said. "I think it's something anyone who is honest can agree on.'

Anna looked at Savannah for a moment.

"I know you believe it." Anna said. "There are others who believe just as strongly it is you who is, even if you need to share the title."

Cameron appeared from around the corner.

Somehow it wasn't a surprise. More than likely she was there just as long as Anna was outside her door. Everyone watched over everyone else in their own way.

"Anna, you can come with me." Cameron said. "Go to the Command Center."

Anna looked from Cameron to Savannah. She looked at Savannah's door to her room. She reluctantly walked away from where she was at. She passed by Cameron but didn't say anything. She looked once back at Savannah before she went around the corner.

Savannah was sure Cameron was there and listened the whole time.

Cameron gave Savannah a big hug.

"Thank you for everything you did today." Cameron said.

Savannah tried to downplay her role and accomplishments. She believed what she said was true.

"I did what anyone would have." Savannah said.

Cameron knew it was much more than that.

"No, you did it all for me." Cameron said. "For - ME…."

Savannah looked Cameron square in the eyes. She spoke from her heart.

"I love you, Cameron." Savannah said. "I always have."

Cameron wanted to touch on what Anna alluded to.

"The 'Natural Order' is real, you've seen it." Cameron said.

Savannah was in Cameron's future for ten months. She witnessed it all.

"I know, Cameron, I know." Savannah said. "One day it will all happen. Please, don't rush it."

Cameron wanted to offer Young Allison more than she was able to offer Savannah.

"I can give her a better experience growing up in the past." Cameron said. "She can grow up like a 'normal' teenager."

Savannah frowned. There was truth to it but there were also other dangers. She didn't think Young Allison should be pulled away from everything.

"I do know in a way it's 'better'." Savannah said. "It's just not right."

Savannah was aware of the many things she missed growing up. She also knew it was 'safer' without Skynet. She was marked for termination by Skynet. She was worried Cameron's exploits would also mark Young Allison for termination. Everything seemed to have positives and negatives associated with it.

Cameron could see Savannah looked run down.

"You look tired." Cameron said. "I want you to start getting regular meals too."

Savannah tried when she could.

"It is kind of hard sometimes…." Savannah said. "I manage."

Cameron was aware where the blame pointed. She heard it from everyone but Savannah.

"That is MY fault." Cameron said.

Cameron opened the door to Savannah's room. She wanted her to rest. They were surprised at what they saw.

Young Allison was asleep in the chair at Savannah's desk.

They both saw how beautiful she looked.

Savannah wanted Young Allison to have her bed to sleep in.

"Put her in my bed." Savannah said. "You can do it without waking her."

Cameron knew it was something she could do. She also realized Savannah was awake when she went to move her in the SUV. She understood Savannah wanted to remain as close to her as possible, for as long as she could, even after they returned to the base. She also would have heard her conversation with Gail.

Savannah took her night clothes and headed into the bathroom. She cleaned up and got ready for bed. When she came out, Cameron was gone and Young Allison was fast asleep. She was at the far side of the bed. There was room for both of them.

Savannah lay down next to her and was asleep before Cameron even made it to the Command Center.

When Young Allison awoke, Savannah was already dressed.

Savannah looked over and smiled.

"Did you have a good night's rest?" Savannah asked.

Young Allison saw she was in Savannah's bed.

"Yes." Young Allison said. "I was in the chair…."

Savannah wanted to give her an explanation.

"Cameron moved you." Savannah said. "She wanted you to be more comfortable."

Young Allison thought she would have woken up if someone moved her.

"Cameron moved me?" Young Allison asked.

Savannah knew Cameron moved her many times when she fell asleep. Cameron always tucked her into her bed.

"Yes." Savannah said. "She's very skillful."

Young Allison felt guilty all of a sudden.

"Where did you sleep?" Young Allison asked.

Savannah looked at Young Allison for a moment. She knew the next bit of information would excite her some.

"I was right next to you." Savannah said. "Get ready and we'll get some food. I promised your mother I'd bring you back myself."

Young Allison wished she could have seen Savannah asleep next to her. It was what she dreamt about.

Neither one of them knew Cameron returned and gave them something to dream about as each of them slept. Young Allison was given a an extra idea. She silently whispered to each of them what they truly wanted. It was something she wanted for both of them as well. It was love which was unbreakable no matter what happened.

Young Allison took care of her personal business in the bathroom. She didn't bring her clothes with her. Normally in her room she wouldn't need to. She wasn't in her room.

Savannah entered the bathroom when she came out of it.

"You can get dressed." Savannah said.

She watched Savannah close the door.

She noticed all of her clothes were neatly laid out. She looked back at the bathroom door. She took off her night clothes and quickly folded them. She took a moment to look at herself in the mirror. She only wore her underwear. She rotated back and forth a couple of times. She frowned at her image.

She picked up her pants and looked at them for a moment. She set them back down. She quickly moved over to Savannah's closet and took out Cameron's wedding dress. She removed the cover from it and put it on. She could feel it fit perfectly. She knew Allison was the one it was fitted for since she was identical to Cameron. She looked at herself in the mirror.

She was a little surprised when Savannah stood next to her. She looked at Savannah quickly and then back at the mirror. It was the two of them together.

Savannah new Young Allison wanted to try on the wedding dress. It was why she returned to the bathroom. She carefully opened the door and watched Young Allison do exactly what she thought she would do.

"You look absolutely beautiful." Savannah said. "The dress was made for you."

Young Allison didn't know what to say.

"I…." Young Allison started.

Savannah reached down and took Young Allison's hand in hers.

"You don't need to say anything." Savannah said. "The future doesn't need an explanation."

Savannah gave Young Allison a hug.

"You need to get ready now." Savannah said softly.

Young Allison smiled.

"Thank you." Young Allison whispered.

Savannah turned away to give Young Allison and some privacy. She sat at her desk and checked a few things on her computer. She watched Young Allison take one more look at herself in the mirror. She then removed the dress. She saw she only wore her underwear. She thought she was very beautiful. She quickly looked away. It wasn't time.

Young Allison took off the dress and carefully put it back on the hanger and covered it over. She placed it back in the closet. She took another look at Savannah with her back to her and quickly got dressed.

"I'm good to go." Young Allison said. "Thank you for laying everything out for me."

Savannah wanted to get started.

"You're welcome." Savannah said.

She called John Henry.

"Where is Cameron at?" Savannah asked.

John Henry wondered why Savannah would ask him.

"Did you call her?" John Henry asked.

Savannah didn't want to interrupt anything or make Cameron change her plans.

"No. I want you to tell me so I don't disturb her." Savannah said.

John Henry actually thought it was good foresight on Savannah's part to consider Cameron's reaction to her call.

"She's at the secure location where the crates were taken." John Henry said.

Savannah figured she should have thought as much. Cameron wanted the cargo in a big way. She was going to need an escort to Palmdale.

"Where are Hanna and Anna?" Savannah asked. "Wait…"

Savannah opened her room door and Anna stood waiting outside. She raised her eyes but didn't say anything. She went back inside. She left the door open so Anna could enter.

"I found Anna." Savannah said.

Savannah figured Hanna was 'busy'. She knew Anna would tell her.

"When will Hanna be done?" Savannah asked.

Anna didn't want to get too descriptive.

"When we're ready to leave, she'll be ready." Anna said.

John Henry hoped to give Savannah some positive news.

"Cammy's on her way back." John Henry said.

Savannah was relieved to hear it. She would have an escort on the way back from Palmdale now.

"Thanks." Savannah said and hung up.

Savannah turned her attention back to Anna.

"Will Jesse or Gail go with us?" Savannah asked.

Anna was able to listen to what happened in each of the rooms while she waited for Savannah and Young Allison to get up.

"I don't know." Anna said. "Jesse may be incapacitated for a while."

Young Allison walked up to where they were.

"Why?" Young Allison asked. "Is she sick?"

Anna and Savannah looked at each other.

Savannah was sure Jesse pulled an 'all nighter' with two Metal girls.

"No, she just needs some rest." Savannah said.

They headed out of Savannah's room.

Anna led them the long way around.

"The other way is shorter." Young Allison said.

Young Allison looked at Savannah and winked.

'She knows.' Savannah thought.

The shorter way passed by Jesse's room….

"We get more exercise this way." Savannah said quickly.

Savannah and Anna both knew Young Allison knew what was really happening. No one wanted to address it. Since they all knew, there was no reason to dwell on it.

Young Allison saw what happened around her house ALL the time. She spied on all of them. She not only heard them, she saw them too. She was sure the Metal girls knew when she was there. She didn't know Cameron told them to allow her curiosities to be fulfilled as long as she remained 'JAFO'. In this instance it would be, Just Another Frustrated Observer. They made sure they were. As long as she remained an observer, there wasn't a problem.

Savannah and Young Allison were in the commissary.

Young Allison wanted to fix something for Savannah.

"Thank you." Savannah said. "Let's keep it simple. As soon as Cammy arrives we need to go."

Young Allison quickly threw a few things together. It wasn't much, but Savannah was able to sit down and eat for a change. She called Cammy again. There was no answer. She looked at Anna.

"Where is Cammy at?" Savannah asked.

Savannah already called her several times earlier. There was no response. Cammy always called her back.

"I don't know." Anna said.

Savannah left the area to call John Henry. She wasn't sure what was up.

"Where is Cammy at?" Savannah asked.

John Henry didn't have all the information.

"She made a detour." John Henry said.

A sense of fear gripped Savannah. Now she wished she wouldn't have eaten. Her gut felt tight. She wondered if there was some new development.

"Now what's going on?" Savannah asked.

John Henry didn't have a better answer.

"I don't know." John Henry said. "She said she wanted to check a few things out on her way back. It seemed like productive use of her time."

Anna could tell there was some issue developing. She wanted to get Young Allison back to Palmdale. She didn't want to get her involved in anything at the base.

"We need to go." Anna said. "I'll get Hanna."

Cammy called Savannah a few minutes later and said she would meet them along the way on the trip back to Palmdale.

Savannah didn't like the delays. They spoke of danger.

"What's going on, Cammy?" Savannah asked. "Where's Cameron?"

Cammy didn't want to get into the details.

"She's busy going over the equipment in the crates." Cammy said. "You guys take off and I'll meet you soon."

Hanna and Anna came around the corner. Hanna was about to put her bra on. Her top was in Anna's hand.

Young Allison watched Hanna put her bra on and then her top on. She knew it was what Savannah looked like, Anna too. She spied on Hanna and her mother many times. She noticed Savannah look at her as she watched Hanna. She wanted to change the subject.

"Savannah, you didn't finish your food." Young Allison said.

Savannah thought of what Cammy was up to.

"I don't feel hungry." Savannah said. "You can have some more if you want. It was really good, thank you."

Savannah wanted to make sure Young Allison got enough to eat.

"Thanks, I need to eat plenty so I grow faster." Young Allison said.

Savannah thought maybe she should go back and finish it herself then. Young Allison didn't need to grow faster….

Savannah knew it was up to her to protect Young Allison and allow her to be who she was now for as long as possible. She knew in the end Cameron was going to do what she wanted. She knew Cameron always won. She would still bat for Young Allison when she could.

Closing monologue by Cameron:

That Is MY Fault

It often appears everyone
Wants what everyone else has
They don't know of the hard work
It takes to develop some pizzazz

Soon everyone wants only
What from another they can use
When they regulate one to that
They don't know it's they who lose

Some people always want more
They become selfish and greedy
They learn to prey upon those
Who are dependent and needy

Most people would rather
Seek out lecherousness lust
They don't want to invest in one
To learn the joy of sharing and trust

When one repeats the same actions
They get the same result
Don't try to tell me
That is my fault

Nobody