My house is a hive of activity. I have all of my kids and grandkids here. Donna, Avery, and Wiley are running around; occasionally they will pop up, darting in and out of the kitchen and living room. Kristina and Dante had shown up with Sam, Danny, Rocco, and Scout, which added one more to the kids running around. Danny and Rocco had headed straight to the kitchen to make a sandwich and do whatever teenagers do on their phones as they ate. Ned and Olivia had arrived not long after that.

I watch Morgan, surrounded by Michael, Joss, Kristina, and Dante. His face is a picture of joy at having his siblings back in his life, filling my Mama heart. I know that there's so much pain and grief lying under the surface of all of their smiles, but I love knowing they have the support of each other. Even Joss and Kristina are keeping it civil for their brothers.

Olivia comes up to me, bumping my hip. "How are you doing?"

I let out a sigh and rake my hand through my hair. "There are too many emotions. You know, I spent half my life in love with Sonny or hating him. But, he was always front and center. Now that he's gone, I don't really know how to feel. As awful as the bad times were, there were good times too. There's a part of me that's mourning him, but I've had a lot of practice mourning him in one way or another lately. The rest of me…" my eyes drift to Michael, "I don't understand how that same man went to my son's house to kill him, his son's house. Or that he killed the mother of his child." I shake my head at the insanity of it all. "I swear to God when I heard he went to hurt Michael, I wanted to desecrate his body, try to make him a little more dead. You don't come after my kids!"

"Oh, I know that feeling. When he shot Dante, I wanted to beat him to a pulp." Her accent gets stronger in her anger. "And Lord knows Sonny was the definition of complicated, for those who loved him and for his kids." She looks at the group of siblings, "But, I'm happy they have each other to get through it. And as your best friend and one of Sonny's formers and baby mamas, I hope you know I am always here for you."

I give her a hug, telling her, "Thank you! God, I didn't even ask how you are doing with everything. You have history with Sonny too, that goes much further back than mine. How are you doing?"

"Bless you for worrying about me! Look, I don't have the history you two shared, so it's different for me. I'm shocked and horrified about it all. And I hate it for my son and grandson." She puts her hand on her neck, almost self-soothing. "Mostly, I keep having these flashbacks of Sonny when he was growing up. He was such a charmer, charming enough that I got pregnant, in fact." She lets out a chuckle, "He was always ambitious and just vital, you know, but with this damaged quality that just drew people, and especially the ladies, to him. It's crazy that someone who was bigger than life and so alive is gone. It's tragic that he ended this way."

"I know. It's not only the awful things that are playing in my head, but the times we were happy. It makes me sad that man, the good parts of him, are gone, that it came to this." Shaking the grief away, I say, "I'm trying to focus on the positives, like the fact that I'm grateful none of my kids or Jason are physically hurt. Well," I roll my eyes and twist my fingers together, "Jason has two bullet wounds, but they are not as bad as they could be. He will heal."

"Praise the Lord for that!" Olivia says. She gives me a look, "Things are going well with you and Jason."

I'm pretty sure my face has a goofy smile on it. I look around to make sure no one is listening, then lean in and quietly tell her, "He asked me to marry him. Well, more told me he was going to marry me." I let out an almost girlish giggle. "I said yes. We are not sharing the information with everything going on, but I had to tell my bestie or I was going to burst."

She steps forward giving me a hug, "Congratulations! I'm happy for you. And my lips are sealed."

"Sealed about what?" Sam asks, coming to join us.

I deflect, "Just how I'm feeling. I actually have a question for you. Do you know who is in charge of planning Sonny's funeral?"

"I don't. Why?" She looks at me with equal measures of sympathy and the awkwardness that always occurs when I'm with Jason.

"They called me about what to do with the body. I guess I'm still listed as his power of attorney, though I'm surprised he didn't have that changed. Anyway, I told them I would ask his family and someone would let them know. I figured maybe it would be best to let the kids figure that out, and thought that you and Dante might have talked about it."

"No, we haven't discussed it." She tells me.

"I can help if you need," Olivia offers. Then, turning, she yells, "Dante get over here."

Dante and the rest of the group head this way, "What's up, Ma?"

I answer instead, "I got notified by the coroner that I am still officially Sonny's power of attorney, and they wanted to know where to send his body. I feel like it should be up to his kids."

Dante nods, "Yeah, of course." He looks at his siblings, saying, "We will get it all taken care of."

Morgan is nodding when Kristina adds, "I want to help. Whatever you need."

"Let's figure out the big stuff and then divide up tasks," Michael takes charge.

"Okay, good. I will leave it to you. But let me know if you need anything." I tell them.

I hear the front door open as they go off to the dining room to plan. I turn to see Jason walking over to me. He takes me into his arms, giving me a kiss.

Reading his face, I feel my heart sink. "Agent Cates?"

Sam asks, "What about Agent Cates?"

Jason shakes his head, "I can't talk about it." Then, he turns our attention, asking, "How are the kids doing?"

Sam speaks up first, "They are dealing with a lot, but they are leaning on each other. Jason, stop changing the subject. What is the problem with the FBI?"

I keep my mouth shut, not willing to share Jason's confidence. I watch as annoyance flashes through his eyes, so I place my hand in his, giving a squeeze for comfort.

"Sam…" he begins, and then pauses as he searches for the right words. He lets out a sigh, "They have leverage over me, so I'm stuck following their orders at the moment."

"What kind of leverage?" She asks him. I look at him, curious as to the answer myself.

He just shakes his head, refusing to elaborate. With a growl of frustration, Sam complains, "Really, Jason? You won't tell me? Maybe I can help."

"Just drop it, Sam. What they have isn't important." When she looks ready to argue, Jason implores, "Please, let this go."

They remain staring at each other for a solid minute, in a silent battle. Finally, Sam grumbles, "You know what? Fine, I'll leave it alone. Because God forbid you ever ask for help."

As she storms off in Dante's direction, I stand in front of Jason, running my hands over his arms in what I hope is a calming gesture. Quietly, I ask, "Are you okay? It didn't go well with the debriefing?"

He pulls me into his arms, holding me close as he admits, "It's not over, yet."

I feel the familiar fear take hold. I will take Jason any way I can get him, but I could live without him being in so much danger. "I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?"

"You are already doing it." He pulls back to stare into my eyes, and runs his fingers absently through my hair and over my back. "Just having your arms to come home to and knowing you are there for the kids when I can't be is all I need."

I lean up to give him a soft kiss. "Always, Jase."

I hear a cough slightly behind me, and turn to find Danny giving his father a look of such love and longing, it makes my eyes misty. He is so much like his father, and has desperately missed having him here. I know the feeling.

While I love Jake too, I understand Danny so much more. Jake has more Elizabeth in him than Jason. And the little, brown-haired pixies, I never understood.

But sometimes I will see Jason in the look in Danny's eyes, the determination to protect, or the thrill when he gets close to the edge. I would watch him play football when we thought Jase was dead, and there were moments, when he was pushing his limits, that he looked so much like Jason it was painful. But, it also made me happy that part of my best friend lived on.

"Hey, Dad. I just wanted to tell you I'm glad you're okay. And I'm sorry about Sonny. I know you were close." He tells his father with bright eyes and a rapt expression.

Jason pulls him in for a hug, "Thank you, son. I will miss him, but I'm glad everyone is safe. Having you here helps."

A knock sounds at the door, so I leave father and son to have a moment alone. I open the door to find Spinelli with a laptop in hand. "Come in. I'm assuming you're here to see Jason."

"Yes, your beloved asked me to meet him here. But first, let me give my condolences for your loss. Whatever happened with you two in the past, I know it's a heartbreaking loss." Spinelli is looking at me earnestly, his eyes misty with tears.

"Thank you. It's hard, but I'm more worried about Jason and the kids. Losing their father, especially the way they did, is going to be tough to get through." I reach out a hand, placing it on his arm and giving him a squeeze, "Spinelli, I want to thank you for helping Jason, not just with this, but all the ways you have helped him over the years. You are a good friend."

"I do try to be a loyal and trustworthy ally. He deserves nothing less." His voice wobbles with emotion.

I give him a hug, "You have my appreciation. And I'm hoping you are here to help him get out of this mess." When he started stuttering to get out of answering, I continue, "You don't have to confirm or deny. Just help him."

"Your wish is my command." He tells me with a smile.

"And what promises has Carly gotten out of you?" Jason asks, coming into the foyer.

"Oh, no! You misunderstand!" Spinelli begins rambling.

I cut in and give Jason my sweetest smile, "Only to help you and keep up the great work."

He comes over to me, his hands cupping my face, and kisses me. He pulls back and looks at me for a second, then shifts his eyes to Spinelli. "Why don't you go in and see everyone. I need to talk to Carly."

Spinelli nods, and quickly leaves.

Nervous, I'm in for a lecture, I start, "I wasn't snooping, just hoping you have the technical genius that is Spinelli..."

He shakes his head with a smile, holding me close, one hand pulling me in tight at my waist, "I just wanted to see how you are doing. I know how you are; you get focused on making sure everyone else is okay, and don't take care of yourself. It's my job to make sure you are okay, and to let you know I'm here for anything you need. So, how are you doing?"

This beautiful man of mine. I lean towards him, giving him a sweet kiss. Then, taking a deep breath, I confess, "I'm all over the place. There are too many emotions. I'm feeling so much anger and sadness about Sonny and what he has done to the people I love the most. I'm terrified the FBI and that fed are going to take you from me or get you killed. And I'm worried about all of the kids and grandkids. What they are dealing with, the heartbreak…"

Tears begin rolling down my cheeks in earnest and quickly turn into sobs. Jason pulls me in even tighter as I bury my face in his neck. He murmurs soothing sounds and words as I let everything out. After a long moment, I feel myself relaxing at the sound of his voice and the steady beating of his heart against mine. When I finally stop crying, he leans back to get me a tissue, never taking his arm from my waist.

After wiping my face and blowing my nose, I ask, "This was exactly what I needed. How do you always know how to give me the precise thing that eases the worry and the pain? Sometimes I think you're magic, the way you can settle me, the way you read me perfectly. How did I survive so long without you?"

He kisses my forehead with such sweetness the tears threaten to begin all over again, though this time for the overwhelming love that fills me to bursting. He leans his forehead against mine as he says, "I'm sorry you had to. I hate that we had to spend a single day apart. I should have been here. If I had been here, no one would have been able to mess with Sonny. If I hadn't been kept away from you, none of this would have happened."

I feel him tensing, blaming himself. I argue, making my voice fierce, "You had no choice, Jason. Despite all of your efforts, you cannot control everything. You were doing what you had to because of those feds. The question now is: what are we going to do to get you free?"