Chapter Twenty

A/N: Hi! Sorry for the long break between chapters. Have been bitten by the writing bug again so I hope to finish this story soon. We have only ten chapters to go, I believe. And dear old friend who followed this story again, thank you. Your approval means a lot to me.

February 1st, 1808

Lady Alina's bedchamber

Milton Hall

Alina tossed and turned in bed. She felt horrible. Her gown stuck to her back, her open hair curled around her neck like a snake and made her feel uncomfortably hot and she was so tangled up in the dozens of blankets that had been piled on her, that even after much effort she couldn't get out of bed. She fell back on the bed with a huff and tried to summon the energy to scream. She tried but her voice failed her. Now she could only pray and hope that someone came to visit her. Since the clock on the mantelpiece showed that it was after twelve, it wasn't likely.

She had been attended by all of her family members in her sickness. She had been sick for many days, they told her, even made a short detour to death's door and had not been alone for even a second according to all accounts but once Dr Landry had given her a clean bill of health, it seemed that there would be no more round the clock care coming her way. She sighed and turned to try and find a more comfortable position. She couldn't find one and merely sank deeper into the mattress. It wasn't fun to be an invalid when there was no caretaker around you.

She looked up at the ceiling and tried to remember the days of her sickness, she barely remembered them, they seemed to blend together, the passage of time rather peculiar, it seemed to stand still and then rush so quickly, it felt like years had passed since the time she had seen Jason. All she remembered were concerned faces, gentle touches and soft words, entreaties not to die, prayers quietly whispered, prayers for her to live. She could remember that each of them had been at her bedside, they had read her stories, told her jokes, changed the compresses on her forehead and they had willed her to fight when she had been too weak herself. She owed them so much. Alina couldn't figure out a way to repay them. Perhaps, her being alive was the best repayment of all.

At first, when Alina fell ill, because she was rendered absolutely senseless by the horrible fevers and wracking cough, she believed that she was sick because she was carrying Jason's child. In a fit of delirium, she had confided this to Dr Landry who had looked like he would faint at her feet.

After an embarrassing conversation in which the good doctor reminded her that simple kissing did not babies make, Alina relaxed. She might die but at least she wasn't pregnant. The horror. It would have completely destroyed her family's reputation and made them outcasts. Lady Catherine would have lorded it over their heads that she had predicted the ruin of their loose moraled daughter and harped about how difficult it would be to find men for Anne now that her niece had tarnished the Fitzwilliam name. She might even convince Darcy that Anne would be the only woman willing to marry him and then, he would be shackled to Aunt Catherine for the rest of her natural life. Alina shuddered at the prospect and crossed her fingers so that it might not happen.

Alina couldn't believe that no one had thought to poison or murder Aunt Catherine. She was an absolutely odious women and rather nasty to the servants. If she had been a man, Alina was sure that she would have disciplined her servants with a cane or a whip. She did seem a sadistic sort.

When Lord Milton had come to visit with her, no, not visit, that wasn't appropriate at all for what Father had done- he had come to nurse her, Alina had asked him if Aunt Catherine had been dropped on the head one too many times in childhood, for her head had certainly suffered some significant damage. She couldn't have said this a year ago. Lord Milton, though not overly fond of his overbearing sister, was rather loyal to the idea of respecting one's Aunt and this tolerated little nonsense about her from his children. Now however, after the Miss Price debale, Lord Milton had decided that the bond between him and his daughter was decidedly stronger than his sense of filial obligation towards his sister, he allowed his children a little leeway when they talked about their Aunt.

Catherine after all, had a special talent for getting on one's nerves. Damien, Lord Milton hadn't wanted to share the news of his daughter's illheath with her but he knew that it would get back to her somehow, so he wrote her an extremely long missive, filled with excruciating details of Alina's illness and requested her to remain in Kent, since the illness was supposedly contagious and it was unwise to expose Anne to such dangers. He asked Darcy, who had arrived at Milton with little Georgiana in tow, two days after he had received the message of Alina's illness, to lie to his Aunt and pretend that he was at Pemberley still because Catherine was afraid that Alina's sudden fragility might inspire some feelings in Darcy and result in a bedside proposal of marriage. Really, no one dreaded the union of Alina and young Darcy as much as Lady Catherine and Damien suspected that she prayed to the good Lord that it might not happen. Though Damien wouldn't have objected to a marriage between his daughter and his nephew, he was rather troubled by the fact that it seemed too much like inbreeding and look what it had done to the royal family! He didn't want any of the future Darcys to end up insane.

Anyway, Alina wasn't very bothered about marriage proposals in her present state. She was very glad she was alive, all her limbs in working order, though she hadn't got the opportunity to test them and she was determined to be grateful for whatever she had in life. She had a loving, devoted father who cared for her happiness and allowed her to live life as her heart desired, a mother who earlier resembled an unforgiving nun at a convent, and now was almost an angel of Mercy who had nursed Alina through some of the worst nights of her life without a single complaint and with great patience, love and care, two brothers who would move heaven and earth to see her healthy, two cousins who loved her to death and a dragonish russian great aunt who had seen fit to rush from Inverness when her beloved grand niece needed her.

Aunt Vasilisa had sometimes sat in the corner of her room and patiently knitted dozens of hats scarves, socks for the tenant children and kept Alexandra company as she stayed up nights nursing her child. She was, in some ways, worse than Aunt Catherine because she was brutally honest about her feelings and opinions but she loved all of them, even Robert and was a pillar of support during this trying time.

Well, it sounds like I'm writing her obituary, Alina mused. Or maybe mine. She had tried to joke about her illness and for the first time in history, her family had unanimously united to take offence. They didn't appreciate gallows humour at all. Her reflections were interrupted by a slew of whispering outside her bedchamber. They were talking too softly for her to make out what they were saying but suddenly Fitz's voice rang out. He sounded irritated.

'Georgie, for Lord's sake, how many times must I tell you that it is grossly improper to visit someone's bedchamber so late?'

'Fitz, please', little Georgiana entreated and Alina could imagine her sticking her bottom lip out in an adorable pout. Fitz would be powerless to resist. He huffed in response and they entered her bedchamber quietly. Alina grunted and turned on her side with some effort.

'Good Evening, Darce, Georgie', Alina grinned. 'I've been waiting for both of you. We haven't met since I began talking sensibly again.'

'Allie!' Georgiana leapt up on the bed and tried her best to embrace her through the blankets. Fitz sighed in displeasure and hauled her off the bed.

'Geogiana Darcy, do not leap on people!'

Alina laughed at Georgie's affronted expression. She had become taller since Alina had seen her last. She was arms and legs and knobby knees and pointy elbows. She reminded Alina of when she had been a child. She had looked tall and lanky too and had been frequently criticized by Aunt Catherine who believed that girls should be tiny and dainty. Georgiana was going to be tall and willowly and Alina would murder Aunt Catherine herself is she tried to criticize Georgie like she had criticized her. Nobody like Aunt Catherine enough to testify against Alina anyway. Alina giggled a little and extracted herself from beneath the blanket with difficulty.

'Come, Georgie.' Alina smiled warmly and held out her arms for Georgie. Fitz let her go and Georgie ran up to Alina. She embraced her tightly and buried her head in Alina's shoulder. 'I was so scared, Allie', she whispered. 'I was scared you were going to heaven, like Papa. I don't want you to go, Allie. You're my best friend and best sister and I love you so much. Please don't go, Allie.'

Alina's eyes filled with tears. Darcy who couldn't hear anything Georgie was saying looked alarmed but Alina gestured at him that she was fine. She stroked Georgie's back, kissed the top of her head. 'I'm not going anywhere, darling', she said. 'I'm here and I'll be here for a long, long time.'

Georgie nodded and burrowed into her. She didn't seem like she would relinquish Alina anytime soon. Alina kept stroking her back. Darcy sat on the corner of her bed and held her hand in both of his. He squeezed her hand and smiled. 'I'm glad you're alright Allie', he said and Alina nodded. 'I'm glad you're here, Darce.'

Darcy gestured to Georgiana and Alina leant back a little to check on her. 'She's asleep, Darce.'

'She's been worried about you and she's tired too, she stayed up in mutiny until I relented and brought her to see you', Darcy said. 'She has been a bit scared of her loved ones dying after Father died suddenly. And she was too young to lose a parent.'

'She has you, Darce', Alina smiled. 'You're the best brother and stand in father any young girl could ask for. You'll love her, look after her and also stop her from getting into mischief.'

'Alina, you praise me too much.' Darcy laughed.

'Well, someone needs to tell you what a great job you're doing, Cousin. How is everyone doing?'

'Uncle Damien left for the ton two days ago, the Parliament started on 21st, he tried his best to postpone his trip but Aunt Milton forced him to go after Dr Landry said you'd be alright soon. Aunt is getting some much needed rest, Lady Vasilisa is badgering Robert to get married, Richard is anxiously waiting for you to get well and oh, I forgot, Niklaus is coming.'

'Niklaus!' Alina couldn't believe it. 'Why is he coming? Surely you told him it's not a good time to visit. I've been gravely ill and Mother is in no condition to have guests.'

'Richard refuses to go to London, he won't leave you and Aunt Milton. He wants to be here and Niklaus is leaving London for Stanway. His father is unwell, so he's coming here to meet Richard and I on his way back home.'

'Oh, I'm well now, everyone can leave if they want to. They have already spent so much time looking after me. Father needs Mother as a hostess in London-'

'Actually, haven't you wondered why Aunt Catherine hasn't been here to see you?' Darcy raised his eyebrows. 'I cannot believe you haven't noticed it.'

'I did but didn't Father tell her that I was dying and contagious and she should save poor Anne from me?'

'Do you really think that would have stopped her for long? Aunt Catherine isn't here now because she's with your father in London. Acting as his hostess. So your mother can rest and regain her strength.'

'Poor Father, I feel rather guilty. He has to deal with Aunt Catherine because of me.' Alina did feel sorry for her father, Aunt Catherine was rather trying.

'I cannot believe she asked your governess to spy on you', Darcy said. He was still holding her hand. He squeezed it periodically as if to remind himself that she was here and she was fine. 'You could have knocked me down with a feather when I received your letter detailing the whole incident. How can Uncle still talk to her after knowing that she put his child in danger?'

'I fell sick before I could pen this in a letter but my mother visited Aunt Catherine shortly before Christmas. And Aunt's Christmas present was a tight slap from my mother. She said she'd kill Aunt Catherine and chop her into pieces and feed them to our hounds.'

'That's a graphic threat', Darcy looked shocked. 'I couldn't have expected this from Aunt Milton. She looks so calm and placid.'

'People can surprise you', Alina grinned. 'As you have tonight. You're practically a gossipy old buddy tonight. What has gotten into you? You are never so voluble.'

'This is two weeks worth of conversation', Darcy replied. ' I couldn't talk to you when you were sick. I wanted to, there were so many things I wanted to say but I couldn't. I don't know why but every time I saw you, I just prayed for you to live. I was waiting for you to wake up. Just do me a favour and stop your nighttime excursions in the winter. I couldn't bear it if something happened to you.'

'Darce'. Alina was overwhelmed by his words. He never spoke so much, he mostly expressed his love through actions and for him to say this! He would have been really worried.

Alina brought her other hand upto his cheek. She cradled his face. 'I'm so sorry, Darce. I promise I'll be more careful from now on. I didn't mean to scare you.'

'But you did', Darcy said vehemently. It was rendered a little ineffectual when he brought up his hand to cover hers. 'You did scare me. You scared all of us. You cannot be so lax with your health and safety. I know you like going on adventures on your own but you're a young woman of sense now, not a child. There is really no excuse for your carelessness.'

'You're right. There isn't any excuse that could make up for how reckless I was. It was stupid and impulsive. Jason almost bit my head off when I threw pebbles at his window-'

'You went out to meet Jason Corey?' Darce released her and leapt up from the bed. 'How can you be so foolish? I cannot believe this. He's your neighbor Alina! You can meet him whenever you want to and you choose the dead of the night, in the cold to sneak out and meet him. What is wrong with you?'

'Hey, hey', Alina called out. 'Be quiet.' She pointed to Georgie. 'She's sleeping. Speak softly.'

'Speak softly?' Darcy's cheeks were flushed. 'I like everyone else thought that you went out in search of Richard because somehow you divined he was coming or you stayed too long in the library without a fire. You cannot imagine how angry at it makes me to hear that you were so...so stupid. What the hell was so important that you had to seek him out in the middle of the night?'

Alina's mouth dropped open in shock. Fitzwilliam Darcy just swore. 'Dear God in heaven', Darcy exclaimed. 'I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to use such language in your presence. Forgive me.'

'It's alright.' Alina really couldn't think of anything to say. She was scared out of her wits. She couldn't imagine what would happen if Darcy found out why she had met Jason. What had seemed so dangerous, so thrilling and so sensible at that time seemed so stupid and senseless now. Really, if she was so desperate for a kiss, she could have sneaked out during the day somehow and invited Jason to a deserted spot in the woods and mauled him to his heart's content. Instead, oh wait.

'Mother's banned me from seeing Jason', Alina explained. 'I cannot meet him here, neither can I go to his house during the day-'

'Oh please!' Darcy waved a hand. 'I know you, I've seen you grow up. If anyone can figure out a way to sneak out and do what you want, it's you.'

'Mother's with me all day!' Alina whisper-yelled. 'I cannot sneak out during the day. And it had been months since I had seen Jason so I went to see him. And we weren't really outside. I went inside his house.'

'SWEET LORD IN HEAVEN', Darcy screamed. Alina removed Georgiana's head from her shoulder and laid her down on her bed. She apologized mentally to Georgie for laying her down on such sweaty linens but she really had to stop Darcy before he woke up the whole household. He was pacing in front of the fire, muttering angrily to himself.

Alina pushed the blankets off her, it was not an easy task and her arms hurt but she managed to do it anyway. She swung her feet off the bed and pushed herself off the bed. Were those warm, sweet kisses with Jason really worth the sickness, the worry and the weakness? They surely weren't and Alina felt like she was drowning in guilt.

She tottered a little on her feet because she was still a little weak and Darcy saw her swaying. He immediately came to her and steadied her with his arms. 'What are you doing Allie? You're not completely well, you'll tire yourself out this way.'

'Help me to the chaise', Alina said, gripping his arms tightly. 'We need to talk and I don't want to wake Georgie.'

'No, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done this now, you aren't well and you need your rest-'

'Darce, just shut up and do what I tell you.' Darcy sighed and picked her up in his arms and carried her to the chaise. Alina giggled. 'This does bring back some memories, eh Darce? Remember when you took me to the Pemberley chapel? I was half convinced that you were going to kill me.'

'Thank you, dear cousin', Darcy said sardonically as he deposited her on the chaise. 'I'm really pleased you thought me a murderer.'

'You called me foolish, stupid, careless! I think I deserve a little revenge.' Darcy snorted as he wrapped her in a blanket and then lay one more over her knees. 'Are you cold?'

'No, I'm fine. It feels nice to be out of bed and sit up. You came at a good time, I was suffocating underneath all those blankets. I really crave a bath.'

'Don't change the subject, Allie. You shouldn't have been in Jason's house..What if someone saw you? You would have been ruined. You're not a child anymore, girls your age are already out in society and some of them are married..No one would have excused your stupidity for childish foolishness. Do you realize that if anyone had caught you, you would either be ruined or married to Jason? I'm sure you like Jason, he is one of your oldest friends but do you want to be married to him?'

Alina shook her head.

'And you despise the various trappings of society but would you like to be ostracized from it? Unable to attend all the balls, parties? No presentation at Court, no Almack's, no chance to meet young, handsome men? Gossip and rumours following you wherever you go? Would you like getting unsavory offers from unsavory men?'

If Darcy had been angry, if he had screamed and shouted, Alina wouldn't have listened to him. His quiet and gentle words affected her and she felt tears running down her cheeks. She really had been so stupid. Perhaps her sickness had been a punishment for the wicked things she had done with Jason.

'Allie', Darce pulled her into his arms. 'Don't cry. I didn't mean to make you cry. Please don't cry. Please, my little darling, don't cry.'

Alina burrowed deeper into his chest and sobbed her heart out. Darcy stroked her back and murmured soothing words in her ear till she stopped crying.

'I'm sorry', Alina hiccuped. 'I'm such a horrible cousin..all I seem to do is cause you trouble. You have to spend all of our time consoling me. I'm sorry I'm not more fun or easy to be with.'

'Nonsense', Darcy smiled. 'You're the best cousin in the whole, wide world.'

'Don't tell anyone, Darce. Richard and Robert will kill Jason. They won't let me see him ever again.'

'I won't tell them, I promise. But you must promise me that you won't go gallivanting out at all times in the night? And you won't be careless with your health?'

'I promise.' Alina settled her head into his shoulder. 'I would say you're the best cousin in the whole wide world but I think I like Georgie a little bit more.'

Darcy chuckled. 'I don't blame you. She's an adorable little girl. Alina, this might hurt you but have you ever thought that if you hadn't seen him in months, why didn't Jason try to contact you? Why wasn't he the one throwing pebbles on your window?'

'I wrote him a note that Mother had forbidden me from seeing him and he was not to come here at any cost.'

'You weren't to go to the Corey Estate at any cost either. But you did. If he really missed you, he would have come here, wouldn't he?'

'Be a little more careful about who you love, Allie. You're so warm, so loving and you open your heart to people so easily. Not everyone deserves to be loved by you.'

Alina nodded and wiped her tears with her hand. 'I'll keep that in mind.' Jason Corey didn't know that fateful, cold January night would be the last time he saw Alina until a very, very long time.

A/N: Phew. This was a long chapter. 3.5k words. Thanks for reading and PLEASE leave a review. I want to know what you think. For everyone who wanted more DarcyxAlina, here you go!

Best Wishes,

Mango