To superpierce, the question about Bandit Homicide wasn't in regard to laws. The question was if it still counted as "homicide" because at the time he burned that bandit camp to the ground with Telne "for peace", he was a DRAGON, not a Human. If someone did a DNA test on him right-then, he and Takehiko Tokei would not have the same DNA; that's how-powerful [Ideal Conversion] is. The Omnitrix from Ben 10 is basically a tech-based version of the Dragons making themselves into Humans.
Basically, since to a Dragon, a Human is little different than an "animal" in the way that Cows are just "livestock" to Humans, does it count as Takei committing murder when he's a capital-d Dragon?
Of course, there's probably arguments for both sides, which is why I made that Archer reference from when Krieger asked if it was murder to kill your own Clone.
To LoamyCoffee, yeah, writing in Tohru's reaction to her being "the deadbeat mom" was pure gold for me to write, because Canonically, Tohru's mom shacked up with Damocles, laid the egg, hatched her baby, and then bounced leaving her to Damocles to raise. It's only when she and the other Dragons began their "Reverse Isekai" that they learned what parenthood should look like, with Tohru acting as Kana's mom and Kobayashi as the "alternative family dad", and that their way of life wasn't the only way.
Of course, I also had a lot of fun writing Telne's segment because the power to ignore the Laws of Perspective is terrifying to fight, and all the context he's finding out about second-hand made for great dialogue too.
To The Viking Stranger, as I've said before and I'll continue to say, using Crossovers instead of OCs where I can makes the world more-vibrant, and it really helps that Miss Elf Can't Lose Weight and Daily Life with a Monster Girl have similar-enough "monsters" in it that I can connect characters through mother/daughter bonds.
As for Elma, she and Tohru always have had a homosexual attraction for one another; the whole thing just turned into a love triangle when Kobayashi-san came into the picture. The whole snafu with Takei being turned into her and Tohru's "maybe baby" with [Ideal Conversion] is just the sort of thing she'd do, since a baby Dragon does need two parents; and it's not like either of them are any sort of stranger to body-altering magic. Like the TWO TIMES that Kobayashi san was magically given male genitals like what happened to Arturia in the Fate series. That's how-casual that sort of thing was, and why Tohru thought Takei was legitimately her and Elma's offspring~
Also, murder isn't anything new to Takei, only in this case, it isn't "self-defense" by any measure of the imagination.
To grx1318, Kuroko already has parents in the MonMusu canon; they're perfectly ordinary farmers out in the Japanese countryside. Also, Revy from Black Lagoon is a product of the 1990s, she'd be radically different if she were retconned into the implied 22XXs.
As for the thing with Tohru and Elma, in the Manga, they agreed back-handedly to "commit bigamy" together because in Japan when they said that, the sentence for Bigamy was "2 years", which is basically nothing for a capital-d Dragon. Or at the very least they discussed it very casually because they have a bit of a Love Triangle going on with Kobayashi-san; even if Meiko hasn't quite warmed up to the idea as of yet.
Raidentensho: very nice. though I was expecting either a more grown-up Kanna or a Dragon aunt from "Monster Physician." That doctor has rizz having all those monster girls go after him. Even his lamia assistant wants some. I am looking forward to more. until then, later!
Re: Well, I have plans for Kanna-chan, no need to worry about that~
As for the protagonist of Monster Girl Doctor, that would be more-fit for a Fantasy setting because all the "species" are largely Uniform, whereas Heteromorphs in My Hero Academia are a little trickier.
Maybe he shows up when Takei makes another trip to the "other world", but only as a Cameo instead of an extensive Crossover.
*AHA*
"Being zick zuuuucks…!" I groaned irritably through my fever, sweating, and stuffed-up nose.
Back before I reincarnated, I almost never got sick on account of good hygiene practices (the least of which was actually washing my damn hands after using the bathroom) and a moderately healthy diet. When I actually did get sick, I really got sick; as in, unable to move and/or puking into the toilet kinda sick.
I almost hadn't given the topic much thought since reincarnating, but I guess I don't have the Cheat Ability that makes me immune to Illness and other "Status Effects".
Earlier I'd tried to go to school as usual, had a sick mask lined up and everything since this was Japan and people tended to just power through this sort of thing. But, after falling flat on my face on the way to the door, Elma put her foot down and tossed me right back into bed before calling the school, and the Tomei residence, to let them know I was down with a really bad fever.
Sorahiko as one of the elderly was all too eager to get out of the house, both for guarding the school gate (and collecting some decent pay for sitting on his ass all day), and also because he was at elevated risk of catching what I had. Even if he was one of the most-jacked old people I was personally acquainted with.
So here I was, completely miserable in bed, my Lombax ears trying to vent some of the fever as my body simultaneously tried to burn out whatever ailed me.
Joy.
*Elsewhile…*
"Hold on, I'm confused about something…" Sigmund hummed as he and Clank watched the feed. "Doesn't he have Nanotech in his system?"
"He does, but non-bots don't like having their sick days taken away, so Nanotech doesn't screen for those sorts of pathogens," Clank replied with the politically-correct vernacular. "Not to mention, the Nanotech causing an atrophy of the immune system would simply result in a negative feedback loop. More nanotech to make up for a compromised immune system ad infinitum… According to Orvus, entire species have gone extinct that way because they pushed 'transspeciesism' too far."
"Huh. Guess his blanket of 'Cheat Abilities' doesn't include 'Illness Immunity'~" the former cleanerbot grinned.
"I'll never understand your fascination with trans-dimensional migrants."
"And yet, you're watching over him same as me."
"I am simply keeping track of an investment of my time and energy."
*AHA*
"Elma, this isn't really necessary," I murmured, sitting in bed in my boxers as my Dragon Mama wiped me down with a damp towel, my sinuses cleared with nasal tissues.
For the time being.
"You're running a fever of 38.9 Celcius. It's very necessary."
-she said after using her tongue of all things to read my temperature.
"I really wish you'd used a thermometer and not your tongue, though."
"Why would you want a thermometer up your butt?"
"They have oral thermometers."
"Ohhhhhhh…"
"Yeah, 'oh'," I returned.
"Well, think of it as a mini-vacation. You've been working so hard what with your schooling. Your training… Putting up with my grandmother," she said with a sidelong look like whenever the subject of Excalibur came up in Soul Eater. "In the other world… I've seen entire villages wiped out by plagues. Kingdoms too. One time a magical bug wiped out the life of an entire continent."
"Magical virus aside, you're still talking about the same world where no-one washes their hands, right?"
"Hey, the other world isn't that backwater. Only the backwater parts of it."
"Not a really convincing argument…" I sigh as she wiped the last of my sweat off. "Can't I just use [Ideal Conversion] to make myself into a version of myself that isn't sick?"
"What would be the point? You're already called in sick from school, and you'd still be sick when you dropped the magic. And besides, flexing your immune system is good for you."
*BAM!*
"My great-grandbaby!"
"O-Obaa-sama?! What are you doing here!?" Elma cried as Telne suddenly burst into the room.
"My great-grandbaby is sick, so I'm here to nurse him back to health!"
"Ack! Telne! Pull your shirt down!" I cried as the loli-grandma pulled her shirt over her head.
*AHA*
After explaining to Telne that "nursing" in the Human tongue didn't solely mean suckling nutrients from mammaries, something Dragons didn't have in the first place, Elma revealed a surprise for me.
"So wait, you made an entire VRMMO for me? Just like that?"
"Well, it took a lot of all-nighters, but after learning how to make VRs and MMOs, I just put the two together after watching and reading every medium relating to Lightsaber combat."
It was frightening how-easily she could trivialize the entire academic career of a programmer and the mass-binging of an entire franchise spanning thousands of years in-universe, and literal hundreds of years IRL…
And sure, there were definitely a number of Star Wars VRMMOs already available to play, spanning every time period and major conflict from the Dawn of the Jedi all the way up to the New Jedi Order and beyond, but Lightsaber combat in the bulk of them tended to be an automatic response. Toggling which Lightsaber Forms you wanted to use with pre-sets of moves and cooldown timers for certain techniques, because the reaction times for intercepting actual universe-accurate blaster bolts and competing with lore-accurate Jedi/Sith reflexes was a hard sell for the average, out-of-shape gamer.
It was why in VRMMO's like Gun Gale Online, you still found the occasional Star Wars enthusiast using it to pander to their nerdy niche fantasies because you could use Laserblades however you wanted.
"So like… all the Lightsaber Forms," I say looking down at the game disk Elma had burned. It was completely unassuming, decorated solely with the words Lightsaber Combat in marker.
"Shii-Cho, Makashi, Soresu, Ataru, Shien & Djem So, Niman, Vapaad, Jar'Kai. All the major Lightsaber Forms that aren't derivatives of other more-classic forms," Elma answered with a nod. "Still, I'm not sure why you want to learn something fictitious."
"Elma, meet Gible. Gible, Elma," I said holding up the Land Shark Pokémon.
" . . . Oh! I see! You're planning for how to fight a rogue Jedi or a Sith if they ever fall through a Rift!" Elma nodded as she bopped a fist onto her hand. "That makes perfect sense! My baby is so smart!" she preened cutely.
On my side of things, I didn't have the heart to tell her that I was only being half-serious at the time and that it was solely for my nerdy fantasies after embracing the fact that I'd literally dove into full on "Isekai Protagonist" self-actualization.
*AHA*
The ability to learn actual Lightsaber combat was my nerdy wet dream come true, and Elma most definitely delivered.
The VR itself didn't have a story mode, but was instead more like a Training Sim that people used to learn IRL-applicable skills like driving, cooking, mountain climbing, etc. Each style came with an assigned master that reliably acted like the character were in a teaching role, and the terrain could be changed across iconic locations throughout the Star Wars universe; from the Jedi Temple dojo on Coruscant, to the plasma refinery beneath the Theed Palace on Naboo, all the way to the flaming hellscape of Mustafar.
Really, with programming skills like hers, Elma could've dominated the market.
Which made it all the more shocking that she made such a digital masterpiece for me on a whim…
Anywho, while I wasn't a Star Wars "Padawan" with an eidetic memory pertaining to every aspect of the genre, I knew the bare bones of each style, more by linking them to each Form's practitioners more than to the style itself.
Form I: Shii-Cho was the oldest known form of Lightsaber combat, a simplistic style that balanced traditional maneuvers intent on maiming and killing with a focus on disarming an armed foe and was used against superior numbers of opponents. Practically all of the Jedi seen on-screen in Star Wars: The Clone Wars made use of this Form, often as a fallback option in case all other techniques failed, and something the Jedi cornered during Order 66 defaulted to before being overwhelmed.
Form II: Makashi was a style regarded for its elegance, graceful presentation, and balletic approach. Notable for its primary focus on facing a single opponent in Lightsaber combat as the weapon technology advanced in the arms race between the Jedi and the Sith, the key user in the media I was familiar with was Count Dooku, who was known as one of the finest Lightsaber duelists of his era.
Form III: Soresu was a defensive style that utilized tight, controlled movements and strict economy of action. Practitioners of this form focused entirely on defense in any situation, committed to analyzing their opponents' opening and allowing fatigue to claim them. The most-famous practitioner I knew of was Obi-Wan Kenobi, who survived basically everything the Clone Wars could throw at him, including but not limited to General Grievous who slew countless Jedi before his final duel on Utapau.
Form IV: Ataru was a speedy, acrobatic, and aggressive lightsaber combat style that placed greater emphasis on using the Force to enhance movements in all areas of combat and required great room to attack from all directions. Considered the most-demanding of the Lightsaber forms, while Qui-Gon Jinn was a practitioner, it was Grandmaster Yoda who made the style famous in my own era.
Form V: Shien & Djem So, were two fluid disciples of lightsaber combat that required quick transitions from dedicated defensive stances to all-out attack. Shien was designed for distance, allowing practitioners to swat back blaster bolts, while Djem So was designed for blade-to-blade combat. Many Jedi felt that Shien and Djem So were not faithful to the Jedi way, which was why it was fitting that Anakin Skywalker, and later Ahsoka Tano, were its most-known practitioners in my era.
Form VI: Niman was considered the most popular lightsaber combat form in the Jedi Order, balancing the qualities presented in all other forms but not incorporating any notable strengths. Less demanding than the other forms, its approach was a careful balance between offense and defense, but leaned towards the latter with the utilization of Force abilities in mind. Ironically, the most-known practitioner of Form VI in my era was Darth Maul; likely a deliberate subversion of the Jedi's favored combat style on the part of Darth Sidious. An inside joke he took much relish in, I'm sure.
Form VII: Juyo, was considered the most aggressive, unpredictable, and more importantly, the most controversial of the lightsaber forms because many practitioners fell to the Dark Side or came very close-to. During the leadup to the Clone Wars, Master Mace Windu created a variant of Juyo called Vaapad which, similar to its predecessor, drew upon the anger and passion of the user but required the willpower to not give in to temptation, characterized by rapid, frenzied strikes and powerful blows.
Jar'Kai was the method of using two lightsabers in combat, whether it be two single blades, two double blades, or one single blade and one double blade. The only practitioners I myself was familiar with were Ahsoka Tano from Star Wars: Clone Wars, and Kao Cen Darach from STAR WARS: The Old Republic's "Return" cinematic trailer.
The Lightsaber Forms were all incredibly diverse, masterfully reproduced with Elma's digital sorcery (both metaphorical and possibly literal), with no singular style superior to all the others, but instead was an interconnected web of Rock/Paper/Scissors-style one-upmanship; one style could naturally trump another, but could itself be trumped by another down the chain.
While my comment about wanting to learn actual Lightsaber combat had been in jest, after coming up against legit Dragons, albeit in training, and unlocking my own Reiki as a result of my Yuyu Hakusho-style "Katabasis", I realized in this moment, that having an ultra-niche fighting style that no-one else in the meat-space knew about… couldn't hurt me too much.
Plus, if I ever encountered a Villain that shot projectiles similar-to Blaster Bolts, learning something like Soresu might be the only thing keeping me alive. And knowing my luck, I might have to save my own ass from some Battle Droids or something.
Sure, I'd have to actually craft a Lightsaber-like weapon to make actual use of the Lightsaber Forms as-intended (since the blades were weightless and would throw off balance if analogue blades were subbed in), but even if that were an impossibility, I'm sure it wouldn't hurt to have something like that up my sleeves for my "Leviathan Ranger" persona. Why? Because knowing my luck, someday the Heroes at some catastrophic shit-show were going to be so monumentally pathetic, I'd once again have to swoop in and save the day like I did with that Feminist Villain whose entire identity was being a woman and using womanhood as a shield to avoid physical reprisal.
Plus, I was home from school with a fever, so what else was I going to do all day?
*AHA*
"Umu. He's got good instincts," Telne nodded from her place in the living room as she watched a feed of Takei inside his VR, learning a defensive sword style from a handsome man with a very magnificent beard.
"Well, he has been repeatedly attacked by Villains… unfortunately," Elma hummed somberly as she watched him work.
Combing the entirety of the Star Wars IP for everything to do with Lightsaber combat had been a herculean task; even for a Dragon who could use [Clairvoyance] magic to take in massive amounts of information at once from a multitude of computer screens. And yes, she'd been aware that Takei had made that request half-in-jest, but panning the camera around with a controller and seeing the smile on his face as he drank in "The Way of the Mynock", made the time and energy spent on this task all the more worth it.
And while it was true she could watch him train all day, there were better things she could do with her time, now that Takei's safety was pretty much guaranteed at this point.
With Telne watching over him, the world's nations could drop their remaining nuclear arsenal on this house and he wouldn't get a scratch on him.
"Watch over him for me. I'm going to the other world to get him some medicine," Elma said as she opened a portal, changing into her Holy Sea Priestess garb, and stepped through. "There's ingredients for Ojiya in the fridge, make sure to use the recipe from the book!" she called out over her shoulder before the portal closed behind her.
"Ojiya… Rice gruel with veggies? Hah! A mere trifle!" Telne said standing on the sofa, arms crossed and laughing haughtily.
*AHA*
"So, how's 'Lightsaber Camp' going?" Telne asked with a smile as I ate my rice gruel.
Thankfully there wasn't anything too weird in it.
That I knew of…
Then again, I did drink "Lao Mang Lone Soup" on the regular, so you know… Glass houses.
"I might've gotten ahead of myself jumping straight to Form III, so I had to backslide to Form I," I admitted embarrassingly. "Still, once I learn the forms in VR, I can take it to the IRL with a weighted blade so I can build a little extra muscle."
"Well, you'll definitely be a one-of-a-kind swordsman, both in this and the other world," Telne hummed.
Seeing me quirk by brow, she continued.
"After the Ceremony of Power that Kobayashi-san participated in, Dragons began adopting humanoid forms and the use of melee weapons more-frequently, so in case you ever run afoul of the Chaos Faction…" she said letting the statement hang. "Fighting in our true forms hasn't gone away entirely, but it's more for casual roughhousing than it was before. The real 'meat' of things is in using a smaller form that can dodge the larger Breath Attacks and make use of the terrain. Plus, it makes us fewer enemies among the Humans when we stop sinking islands once every decade."
"Ceremony of Power?"
"Think of it as a 'Budokai Tenkaichi' for Dragons. It's how the Factions rank themselves within the hierarchy."
Hm. Must be something from the manga. Or maybe post-series.
Which once again reminds me of the worst part of an Isekai; in the event you can't go home, you'll always be left wondering how your favorite stories end.
"How-often are they held?"
"Once a Human decade in peacetimes, when we're actively fighting it gets put off to two or three, though there's more than three in each century at the least," she answered. "Although I suppose if the Demon Lord appears again, you could help the Heroes with that~"
I can't tell if she's joking or not, and that frightens the hell out of me.
*AHA*
After some more rice gruel, some more sweat-cleaning, some more Lightsaber training, a nap, and a spot of cold medicine, Elma came back from wherever I'd been all day.
"Ohayo!" the Harmony Dragon beamed as she changed back into her perky OL form. "Takei-kun, I got you some medicine!" she smiled holding out a tiny bottle with script that looked like it was from Monster Hunter. "Here, this should be enough," she said rolling two purple pills into my waiting palm.
" . . . "
While all I really needed to beat this cold was some non-prescription domestic meds and rest…
"Arigatou gozaimasu."
*Siiiip* *Gulp*
"Umu. I can feel it kicking in already!" I beamed.
"Hee hee~" Elma beamed as she got a warm and gooey center.
Honestly, I can't tell if this stuff's any better than what's available around the corner, but… What else was I supposed to say to that face?
Still, why does it feel like I'm forgetting something…
*AHA*
"ELLLLLMAAAAAAA!"
"Whoop, time to go!" Sorahiko said abandoning his breakfast and hobbling out the door.
"Takei-kun, what's wrong?!" Elma cried as she ran over to her surrogate's room.
*AHA*
"I CAN'T GO TO SCHOOL LOOKING LIKE THIIIIS!"
And what, pray tell, did I look like?
Apparently the medicine Elma gave me came from the other world and was made by and for "Beast-Folk", and that apparently it was of the magical variety instead of the traditional sort; hence I was experiencing physical side-effects.
More specifically, a second pair of cat ears atop my head, thick whiskers on my face, and a blond brown-striped cat tail protruding from my derriere, the latter currently fluffed up to thrice its original size as I yowled, actually yowled at her.
"Kawaiiii…~!"
"Elma don't you DARE gush at me! How could a member of the Harmony Faction not know about the damn warning labels!"
That statement made Elma look like she'd been struck upon the face with a herring sandwich, and she proceeded to fall to her hands and knees in the corner with a little storm cloud above her head.
"I'm a horrible pers-ho-ho-hooooon!" she wailed dramatically, looking quite pitiful despite being one of the most-powerful beings on this planet. That I knew of.
*Giba* my Land Shark chirped as he swatted at my floofed-up tail.
And that's how I wound up being sick from school two days in a row.
*AHA*
"HAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"
"Tohru! This isn't funny!" Elma wailed.
"You're right. It isn't funny," the Chaos Dragon apologized. "It's hilarious! Haaaaa ha ha!"
"Hey, you made the same mistake too, you know," I pouted as my new tail swished angrily behind me.
The two of them may've been my surrogate mamas, but I wouldn't umbrage anyone laughing at Elma; even my other surrogate!
"Yeah, but you were already cat-like to begin with~" Tohru cooed as she rubbed my head, all four of my cat ears shooting up, as did my tail, as I kami-damn purred at her touch. "Awwww, you are just the cutiest~"
"St-st-st-st-stop that!" I hissed batting her hand away.
"Gomen, gomen, I just couldn't help myself~" she beamed, looking too damned cute to stay angry at.
And by the look on her face, she knew it too.
Damn you Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid for being such a great feel-good animeee…!
"Want me to get you a scratching post with part of Yggdrasil in it~?"
"I…! I…! I can't tell if you're joking or not!"
"Hya hahahahaa!"
*AHA*
Thankfully, the fact that I didn't develop retractable claws as a result of Elma's Beast-Folk remedy, meant Tohru wouldn't do anything to piss off the Elves like she had before.
Something to do with magic water, I think…
Anywho! According to the anecdote, Kobayashi's side-effects wore off after "half a day".
Problem was however, there were roughly two-hundred years of "evolution" between then and now, so the addition of superpowers might've complicated things.
Worst-case scenario, they'd have to fabricate a Villain attack to get me out of school for longer while they solved this issue for the long-term.
Though as a juxtaposition to my normally shitty luck, it was also perfectly feasible that the Beast-Folk remedy's side-effects would simply wear off and things would get back to "business as usual".
So, apart from resisting the temptation presented by cat toys, I did the homework I missed out on yesterday, made some bento for Elma to send over to the Mon Squad, sparred on the roof with Tohru who used a futon beater of all things against my Form I, and played a little GGO.
*AHA*
"So, wait, are you just playing hooky?" I asked Dust_2_Dust as we hunted giant techno-organic scorpions in the badlands underneath the SBC Glocken.
"Nah, I'm home schooled," my GGO buddy huffed as he experimentally swung an elaborate-looking black-and-silver photon sword with a crimson beam about.
Probably the result of a hefty microtransaction.
"What about you? What's normal person school like?"
"You're asking me to describe the color red to a blind man."
"Eh, I'm sure it's lame anyway," he said hacking a techno-scorpion's head in half with his expensive beam sword, only for its tail to whip forward and catch him in the body armor. "SUMBITCH!" *Thump* "FUCK! I'M PARALYZED!"
"Yeah! I noticed!" I said as I took a stance over my paralyzed squadmate, and bandied my blue-beamed laser sword about, slicing off the ends of mandibles, pincers, and stingers with Form I.
This pitiful showing wouldn't do jack shit against legit battle droids and Sith, but in a VRMMO calibrated for "human" reaction speeds, it got the job done.
Made me wonder how-bullshit I'd be once I could use the whole of my AGI stat with Lightsaber combat.
"Well… That was something," Dust_2_Dust hummed as I slew the last of the scorpions a few minutes later. "Anyway, I got an Antidote in my pocket. Can you spike me?"
"Yeah, sure. Which pocket?"
"Back pocket."
Rolling him face-down into the post-apocalyptic desert sands without even a shred of preamble, a moment before I was about to frisk his virtual fanny, more techno-scorpions unburied themselves from the sand all around us. Double the number as when we first drew agro with a Sonic Lure.
"Quick! Grab the antidote!"
"You got like ten back pockets!"
"LEFT CHEEK! LEFT CHEEK! LEFT CHEEK!" Dust_2_Dust cried as they closed in on us.
*AHA*
"Soooo… Are you just gonna Main with a Photon Sword from now on?" Sefgas asked as he and 5ilencer joined us at 'our' hole-in-the-wall bar.
"Only in PVE," I returned as I nursed a grape soda.
And how is it that the virtual grape soda tastes more like grape soda (as I remember it) than actual grape soda!?
Oh well. At least unlike Llenn, I wasn't staying in GGO because I have a body complex.
"If I wanted to waggle laser swords all day, I'd hop over to one of the Star Wars VRMMOs."
"What Wars?" 5ilencer blinked.
"An oldie but a goodie," I returned glumly, and realizing that anyone who did know about the sci-fi/western/space opera series was more-likely to be interested in one of the reboots rather than 'Star Wars: Classic'.
"Classic" being considered anything more than 100 years old, by the by. And as it stood, only the historians and those in film school cared about stuff from that-far back. And it always was quite fun when I could share the movies I loved (that actually exist on this Earth) with my new friends.
"Looks like Stendhal might get some stiff competition," Dust_2_Dust hummed as he nursed a Coke & Rum. "I'd accuse you of Hacks, but those haven't been an issue in… more than a century really."
Hold on, you said something outrageous just now.
"Anyway, I hear your school's about to do some kind of wacky gameshow?" 5ilencer inquired.
"Yeah, some 'Rival Schools' thing between a pair of unofficial Elevator Schools for Yuuei and Shiketsu," I hum, Dust_2_Dust glowering angrily into his glass. "I've never actually seen Murakami Chugakko, but Picar-sensei absolutely hates their principal. Part of me wants to know, but the rest honestly doesn't care."
"Just make sure you wring some prize money out of it, or I'm going to be very disappointed in you," Dust_2_Dust huffed.
"Hai, hai," I waved off. "So Sefgas, 5ilencer, how was school for you guys today?"
"People are assholes," the gasmask-clad avatar huffed.
"Preaching to the choir on that one," the lippy avatar quipped in turn, raising his glass in a toast.
*AHA*
Pulling my ASU off my head, I was greeted to the sight of Tohru looming over my bed with a futon beater of all things in her hand.
"Oh, are you done in make-believe fantasy land?" the Chaos Dragon in a cute maid outfit inquired haughtily. "Then get dressed. You and I are going to have a go."
"I'm not joining you and Elma in a love triangle."
"No-N-N-N-Not that kind of 'a go'!" the daughter of Damocles squealed cutely.
*AHA*
And thank Kami it wasn't, though I'd almost prefer the love triangle.
Why? Because Tohru wanted to have a go at me like Elma and Telne before her. With the futon beater.
Obviously we absconded to the other world, and her ability to open portals came to her as-easily as it did back then, because unlike with Elma, there was almost zero urgency with our departure as she asked whether or not I had to use the bathroom before we left, making no effort to close her portal despite how much Mana it was probably taking up to hold the thing open.
And honestly, if the RDA hadn't come kicking my door down previously, I think it was safe to say that magically meta-stable portals didn't set off their spy satellites or whatever they used to track "Corruption Rays" or whatever it was appropriate to call it.
So here we were on a volcanic island in the ass-end middle of fucking nowhere, nothing but the ocean visible in all directions, and aforementioned volcano spewing up a thin wisp of smoke that'd have made me a bit more worried if I didn't live in a country hit by infrequent earthquakes. Heck, I've actually slept through a few.
But that was besides the point.
"Get ready whenever you're up for it," Tohru hummed as she spun her futon beater in her hand.
" . . . Henshin."
One dramatic backflip and pose later, and I was clad head to toe in Lagiacrus Armor.
"Oh? Nice fish-scale armor," the Dragon Maid hummed as I fished in the [Item Box] connected to the 'Leviathan Morpher'.
"Only you could think a Lagiacrus as just 'a fish'," I deadpan from behind my visor.
Finally finding what I was looking for, I withdrew the katana-shaped "Lagiacrus Blade" and slipped into my best Form I stance.
No way in hell I'd be able to close the gap against a centuries-old capital-d Dragon who'd been alive for centuries even before meeting Kobayashi-san two centuries ago, but that was the entire point of growing up. No-one was end-of-series powerful at the very start of their adventure. And while I could feasibly dedicate years and years to learning all the Lightsaber forms, maybe adapt it to regular blades, in all likelihood I'd probably only learn two, maybe three more after getting a grasp on Form I.
But that would be a story for another day.
"Alright, I'm ready," I said facing her.
"No."
ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴ
"You are not," Tohru said menacingly into the back of my head as her afterimage evaporated.
The next instant she struck me upside the head, ringing my bell and using my face to dig an acres-long trench in the volcanic soil at her feet, my journey only coming to an end with the spray of sea salt.
"Owwwwwwww...!" I moaned, my vertebrae feeling like a stressed potato chip.
"Arise, o child of mine! The time hath come! Thy mother commands thee!"
-her bellowing draconic tone demanded of me as I rose from the brine.
"Awaken to the unclean lands, warrior dragon! Feel the roar of life within thee! Raise a battle cry to the endless skies above!"
Raising my visor up to meet her, the pressure pouring out of her made my body lock in place.
"Now rise! RISE, and strike down thy mortal foes! Give no quarter, for none shall be given in turn!"
Though she only wielded a futon beater, I was seconds away from pissing myself.
"HAVE AT THEE!"
When she lunged at me, I then pissed myself.
And if anyone says they wouldn't in this scenario, they're a Kami-damned liar.
*AHA*
"TOHRU! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY BABY?!" Elma cried as she hugged my bruise-covered body.
"Our baby, and I was just making sure he's big and strong," Tohru nodded like there was nothing wrong with the many acres of farmland she'd tilled while substituting me for a plow.
"He isn't even a 'teen-ager' yet! He needs to grow at his own pace! Especially with weaponry!"
"Really making me reconsider joint custody."
This is my life now.
-thought I to myself as Elma and Tohru bickered back and forth about proper child-rearing. Elma wanted to raise me up like a human Shounen (read: Isekai) Protagonist, while Tohru wanted to raise me up to capital-d Dragon standards.
Still, if anything good came of masquerading as their "maybe-baby", it was that they weren't making me choose; which either meant the Factions were in some kind of armistice, or I was being allowed to make my own way until some point in the future where I'd choose either the Harmony, Chaos, or Spectator Factions.
Either way, I imagined my training with Tohru would be the textbook definition of "tough love".
*BOOOOOOOOOOOM!*
And now the volcano's exploding! Best, fucking, day, ever!
OF ALL TIME!
"Hey, do you mind?!" Tohru growled angrily as energy gathered in her maw. "We're trying to have a conversaTIOOOOOOOON!"
*THOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!*
In the next instant she blasted the erupting volcano onto another continent, and I was happy that the Dragons squatting on Earth were a little more... discrete...
*AHA*
Good news, I was feeling better than ever, and I no longer had a second set of cat ears and whiskers on my face.
The bad news, was that apparently part of the magic from that medicine decided it liked certain aspects of my meta-powered DNA and decided my tail was going to stay exactly where it was, the tip fluffing out more like a lion's (or a Lombax's) while the length had stripes/rings to help complete the look.
Not that I had a problem with it per-se, I could always say that the two sick days were because my Quirk was acting weird, hence the tail, but still, now I'd have to be wary of grabby hands, closing doors, and so-on until I got the hang of this thing.
Not to mention that if I couldn't get this thing under control(!) I'd give away whatever I was thinking, even when I didn't want to.
Oh, and I'd have to get all of my pants (and boxers) tailored to accommodate the new appendage since not doing that would leave them handing off my ass like some kind of hooligan!
Oh well. At least cat-like tails are something my class has seen before. Might even be able to go the whole day without being noticed.
*AHA*
"Oh, so that's why you were out for two days."
"Yeah, I remember what that's like."
"Growing pains are just the worst!"
"I think your fanbase just got a little more diverse."
"I think you mean 'weird'."
"It was 'always' going to be weird."
"I think it'd only fall into 'that' category if he got fur on his face. Right now he isn't full-on Furry."
People noticed right away.
*AHA*
"Well, at least I'm not wearing the 'pilot suit' today," I muttered in gym that day as I lay lazily on the grassy hill with Shiori and Kuromi.
Since I had allegedly grown a fully-formed tail over the course of two days, I was being given a break from PE until everything "settled in"; something Murakami had the paperwork for in abundance. Not to mention, the Ultra Training Mail would need to be modified to accommodate the tail, since apparently, coiling it around myself and wearing it like a belt inside reinforced spandex/rubber/whatever was not good for a developing body.
"So, how's your Lightsaber training going?" the 2D Girl asked eagerly.
Right, right, her meta-awareness transcends Medium…
"Only been at it for a couple of days, soooo, 'not well'. Let's put it in the 'not well' category."
"You know you're going to be ridiculed endlessly once some 'Padawan' somewhere sees you on the news and connects the dots, right?" the Shadow Girl hummed from my side, holding Gible in her lap.
"Oh please, like I'm going to be the first person to model my fighting techniques after George Lucas' magnum opus."
"I mean, our gym teacher does look like Chewbaka," Shiori admitted. "That and our principal basically made his Hero Agency one giant Star Trek reference."
"It must be really fun knowing everything you know," the Shadow Girl quipped back sarcastically.
"What's important is, my tail didn't get pulled out with the biggest set of pliers Elma could find."
"Dragonball GT!" Shiori whooped.
"No-one considers that Canon!" Kuromi quipped back.
*AN*
Originally, the next chapter after previously was going to be the start of the "Run for the Money: Rival Schools" episode I'd been building up to between Picar and Bort-sensei's schools, but a part of Episode 8 of Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid S always stuck with me, and I could always imagine that as a member of the Harmony Faction, Elma could just ask for some Beast Person medicine, and they'd just hand some over whereas Tohru had to actually fight for it.
Also, it's been a while since Takei has hung out with his GGO buddies on-screen, so this was a nice little departure as well. Especially since things got kinda heavy last-chapter with Elma & Tohru; even with the comedic edge.
That I found a way to give Takei a Lombax-like tail is also a plus; a result of this story taking on a life of its own. At the very start, things were going to turn out way differently; but I digress.
Anywho, next chapter for sure will be the "Rival Schools" episode, and I'm eager to try writing out a meta-powered Japanese gameshow not unlike the Yuuei Sports Festival. Because you can be sure that in the MHA world, that any TV show that has people using their Quirks, is the sort of thing that'd get massive viewership. Sorta like how today the gameshows where super-buffed or super-skilled people bring in viewers; like the shows inspired by American Gladiators. And sure, it'd be a pain in the ass to insure, but I'd think the viewership would be pretty much guaranteed.
But once again, I digress.
GOTTA BLAST!