Author's Note: I know it's a little late for Star Wars Day, but you know what they say, better late than never.
One more thing, let's give a shoutout to Rooster Teeth, who have unfortunately been taken from us. When news of their shutdown hit me, it cut very deep. Adios, Rooster Teeth. And goodbye, Red vs Blue. You shall be missed.
Enjoy the chapter. Any and all comments are welcome.
"Pheewww! The Pelican goes in for a landing, but the radio jammer's shooting up all sorts of electricity and stuff! It was like…" Palomo then imitated lightning noises to all the New Republic soldiers who listened as he presented to himself to them all. "We're on the ground. Captain Tucker's bleeding out, the Reds and Blues were all bashed up, and so Captain Jena was down an arm! Things… don't look good.
"We led them all aboard the ship and take off as soon as we can, and that's when he spoke to me. 'Palomo, come closer. Come closer.' It was my captain. I leaned in. 'Don't speak, Tucker. You need your strength.' But he brushed my hand aside, looked at me straight in the eyes, and said to me, 'Palomo, you did good, kid. You did good.'"
"OH, THAT'S BULLSHIT!" Tucker shouted. He, Grif, Simmons, and Caboose looked over at their lieutenants. "What I actually told you was to stop crying and to shut the eff up!"
"Okay, yeah," Palomo said, "But the sentiment was still there."
"I effing hate you, Palomo." Tucker said bitterly.
"You know," Bitters said, "If we hadn't shown up with that ship, you'd probably be dead, like for real, this time."
"Hey, we're a bunch of mavericks, okay? We weren't even planning on making out alive." Grif boasted. "That was just an added bonus for being so effing awesome."
"You went on a suicide mission for us?" Jensen asked.
"Well, uh, you know, we figured we owed you one." Simmons answered.
"That's so selfless." Jensen said admiringly. "And hey, your voice didn't crack."
"It didn't?" Simmons asked nervously forcing a crack in his tone. "I mean, I don't know what you're talking about!"
"Alright, don't get carried away." Grif said. "You guys just happened to be the first people we ever met who thought we were cool. We saved you strictly for selfish reasons. And with the hope there'd be more pampering upon our return."
"I'M HERE WHENEVER YOU NEED ME, SIR!"
Grif sighed recognizing the voice of the kiss-ass on his team. "He seriously survived the fight? I mean, really? The universe just had to spare Matthews."
"Well, I think I speak for all of us when I say, thank you." Smith said.
"And I think that I speak for all of us when I say when this feels like the beginning of a beautiful friendship." Caboose added. "Isn't that right, Freckles?"
"Affirmative."
"No! Absolutely not! Way too cheesy!" Grif, Simmons, and Tucker said over each other.
"Thank you, captain." Smith said. "I'll remember this till the day I die. Or my name isn't John Elizabeth Andersmith."
"Oh, god! Is it?" Tucker asked.
"That sounds like a hot name to me." Brooke said. "So… where's Captain Jena? We'd all love to thank her."
"She's up at the medical wing getting the finishing touches worked on." Tucker said. "I think it's absolutely badass."
"But Dr. Grey advised us not to let a bunch of people crowd her at once." Simmons said. "She's still going to need time to adjust and not put any strain on her new attachment."
Speak of the devil, Jena Isa emerged from the hospital wing and walked up to a balcony of the same tower. There, she was happy to see her father-figure, Strike, waiting for her.
"How's the arm?" he asked.
Jena held up her right arm and revealed her robotic forearm and hand. It partially-shined with used metal plating which moved smoothly as if it was a real hand.
"Dr. Grey may be nuts, but she knows how to make a hand." Jena said. "Just gonna be a couple of weeks to get used to this before I return to the field."
"Captain Jena." The Padawan and the clone turned and saw General Kimball and General Doyle approach her sharing the balcony with them. Behind them also stood Washington, Sarge, Donut, and Lopez. "On behalf of the New Republic…."
"And the Federal Army." Doyle interjected.
"Right…" Kimball said bitterly before clearing her throat. "We'd like to thank you for exposing the Empire's scheme."
"Thanks, but you should really thank, Tucker." Jena said. "The whole 'tricking Felix into confessing his crimes' thing was all his idea."
"Really?" Kimball asked.
"Kind of a shocker, huh?" Sarge asked.
"No. Not really." Kimball answered.
"So what about this dispute between your armies?" Jena asked. "You two fighting each other is just what the Empire wants."
"We know, but there's still some issues that we still have to get over." Doyle said. "Still, we agreed that the Empire is a greater threat and have decided that until this is settled, we must be at a truce."
"Do you know why the Empire wants us dead?" Kimball asked.
"Felix said the Emperor wants your planet." Strike said. "Didn't say much else."
"We originally thought they were after the leftover alien relics on Chorus," Washington said, "But if Palpatine himself is personally invested in this, that means there's more to this planet than we realize. Whatever the reason though, we must drive the Empire off of Chorus until we can contact the UNSC. Once they realize that Chorus is still their planet, they can reclaim it. After that, Palpatine will have to pry Chorus out of their dead hands."
"Does the UNSC even have hands?" Donut asked.
"I was speaking metaphorically." Washington said.
"Well, if there's anything we can ever do for you, please don't hesitate to ask." Doyle said.
"Oh, gosh," Donut said, "I don't think that's really ne…"
"What's a rank higher than captain?" Sarge interrupted.
"Uh, colonel?" Doyle answered confusingly.
"Promote me to colonel."
"Oh, very well then." Doyle said. "In honor of your service, I hereby promote you to Colonel... Uh...Sarge."
Satisfied, Sarge yelled out so Grif can hear him. "YOU HEAR THAT, NUMB NUTS! I OUTRANK YOU… AGAIN!"
Jena laughed before she looked around. "Hey, where are Carolina and Church?"
"Talking by the lake." Strike said. "You want to thank them too?"
Jena nodded, and everyone allowed her to leave with her clone friend.
Jena and Strike headed to the cavern where the lake was. Carolina waited for them while Church hovered beside her.
"Glad to see you back on your two feet." Church said.
"Me too." Jena said looking at her new arm. "You know, looking at this, I often think if this is how Master Skywalker felt."
"Was he another Jedi you knew?" Carolina asked.
"Well, I never knew him personally, but I've heard a lot about him." Jena answered.
"Me too." Strike said. "General Skywalker was a very powerful and skillful Jedi. He may have had his emotional moments, but he helped turn the tide in many battles in the Clone Wars."
"Sounds like he'd be useful to have around." Church said before a quick flash of green. "Oh, hey, hold on."
"What was that?" Carolina asked.
"That was the end of a very long and very annoying decryption process." Church answered.
"You mean the manifest?" Jena asked. "You know who the Empire is working with?"
"Eff, yeah. I'm processing it now." Church disappeared for a second before returning. "Well, not the most dramatic revelation, but I believe that we have our culprit."
"Who is it?" Carolina asked.
"Charon Industries." Church answered. "Big umbrella corporation that got a hand in every major market you can think of. Even messed around with cryogenics a few years back. But it looks like their largest profits come from weapons and technology. They own most of the stuff on the ship."
"So Charon arranged for the ship to fly over Chorus, where their Imperial agents would crash them and raid them." Strike said.
"In a nutshell, yeah." Church said.
"They sound familiar." Carolina said.
"Yeah, Project Freelancer stole some assets from them once or twice," Church said, "And managed to destroy quite a bit of private property in the process."
"You mean the Resistance?" Carolina asked.
"You know them?" Jena asked.
"Back in my Freelancer days, one of our biggest enemies was a group of mysterious mercenaries who was trying to profit off of technology that we were also after." Carolina said. "They even turned one of our own against us and used her armor."
"Not only that, but these guys also tried a hand at an ancient alien temple in the desert before the Reds and Blues showed up and killed them." Church said.
"So it all comes full circle." Jena said.
"But I thought they were a UNSC splinter group." Carolina said.
"The soldiers were all UNSC," Church explained, "But according to my records, they've been hired on to act as Charon's private security force."
"Is that legal?" Carolina asked.
"I doubt it. Looks like Charon and the military started getting really buddy-buddy around the time that… Oh, would you look at that?"
"What is it?" Jena asked.
"You guys remember Malcolm Hargrove?" Church asked.
"The UNSC chairman guy?" Jena asked. "The one who gave us our pardon and welcome into UNSC space after what happened with the Director?"
"Yeah, him. According to my records, he's also the CEO of Charon Industries." Church said.
"Well, I'll be." Strike chuckled. "So Hargrove only pardoned us to set us up for the Empire. But what does he get out of this?"
"If I were to guess," Church said, "I'd say that if he helped the Empire take over the UNSC, then he'd be a welcome member of Palpatine's inner circle. All he has to do is be their spy, arrange for weapon cargo ships to crash on Chorus, and make private Empire-Covenant fusion weapons for his secret partners."
"Well, now, we know the truth." Carolina said. "So what now?"
"I have to make a call." Church said.
"AAAAHH!"
The Thirteenth Sister, Felix, and Locus all yelled when they were all forced to slam into the wall by Darth Vader, who was pushing them from the other end of their call.
"HOW THE EFF IS HE DOING THIS?!" Felix asked working through the pain. "HE'S NOT EVEN HERE!"
"Do not think to question me!" Vader shouted as he broke his hold on them and let them collapse on the ground. "That's almost as foolish as failing me!"
"Lord Vader, please…" the Thirteenth Sister pleaded before Vader aimed his hand at her directly. At that moment, she found herself unable to breathe. He was held off of the ground while feeling a tight grip squeezing her throat violently. Her legs kicked the air underneath her.
"The three of you have failed me." Vader said. "You were bested by a lonesome Padawan, an old clone, and a group of what can hardly be considered soldiers."
"They got lucky!" Felix defended.
"They were underestimated," Locus said, "And it won't happen again."
"I know it won't." Vader said. "This is what happens to failures!"
The Thirteenth Sister struggled to breath trying to force words out of her breaking throat. "We… haven't… failed!"
After another moment, Darth Vader released his grip on the Inquisitor, who fell on her hands and knees coughing violently for air.
"Explain now," Vader demanded, "Or you will have wasted your final breath."
After regaining the ability to speak, she looked up desperately at Darth Vader with her one good eye while her other eye was covered with an eyepatch.
"My lord, our mission was to eliminate the colonists of Chorus. As far as I know, our objective remains the same. We haven't failed the mission. It's just that now that we can't rely on the armies to kill each other, we're going to have to approach this differently. We only fail if they manage to make contact with the UNSC. And I still haven't failed to kill the Jedi either. It's not like she escaped. She's still on the planet, and I will hunt her down." She brushed her hand on her eyepatch. "She made it personal."
Darth Vader stared intensely through the monitor. Everyone was getting anxious at what he might do. As soon as he loosened his shoulders, their fears began to fall.
"You make a convincing argument." Vader said. "I do not tolerate failure, but I will grant you another chance. But if you keep up your string of failures, I promise, you will lose more than your eye. Remember that you are not irreplaceable, and that you are regarded as the weakest of the Inquisitors."
The Thirteenth Sister lowered her head in shame.
"We're going to need more soldiers." Felix said. "Now that Chorus knows about the radio jammers, we're going to need teams to defend them so they don't call for help. But we'll need even more if we're going to take the fight to the enemy."
"We can only spare so many Imperial officers." Darth Vader said. "If we send off too much, the UNSC will notice and discover our operation. So if you need more soldiers, you're just going to have to solve that problem on your own."
"We'll think of something." Locus said.
"Good." Vader said. "Remember, the Emperor wants this planet, so if anything happens that will prevent him from having it, then you will not have to worry about me, because he'll punish you himself."
"Hello! Yes, hello!"
A new voice came from the communication console. It was Caboose's voice, which caught everyone by surprise.
"What is this?" Vader asked.
"Extra sauce, please!" Caboose's voice said.
"An outside transmission." Locus surmised.
"How'd they get this channel?" Felix asked.
"They must have picked it up from the radio frequencies used by the Stormtroopers they captured." the Thirteenth Sister said.
Lord Vader's footage shrank to fill only half the screen while the other half was taken up by footage of the Reds and Blues, who stood beside Generals Doyle and Kimball.
"So, you must be Darth Vader, the Emperor's number two." Church said.
"He surely seems like it." Grif said.
"Nice." Simmons said.
"The infamous Reds and Blues, I presume." Darth Vader said. "You're taking quite a risk making contact with me. I don't have to be there to kill you."
"Hey, if you try anything, then I'm cutting the feed." Church said.
"Yeah! We dare you to try!" Tucker challenged.
"Uh, probably not a good idea to antagonize the bad guy." Donut said.
"You people have been a thorn in our side for a while," Vader said, "And to think, you're nothing more than a band of pathetic outcasts."
"Yeah, well, we wing it." Tucker said.
"It shows." Vader said. "If you're here to negotiate a surrender, I must inform you that your ship has set sail. Quite literally in fact."
"Actually, we were hoping to read you a letter." Washington said.
"It's just a little something we put together for you." Sarge said. "Considering we'll be seeing a lot of each other over the next few weeks."
"And feel free to pass it along to your boss, Palpatine." Strike said. "We want him to hear this too."
"Just to show we're ready to fight." Jena said. "The floor is yours, Church."
With a digital smile, Church gave his address to the enemy.
"Dear Empire, it has come to our attention that you have declared war on the planet Chorus. We regret to inform you that this is a really shitty idea. Not only have you managed to annoy the people that you've failed to kill, time and time again; you've also found a way to piss off an entire planet. Now they may not have the best equipment and they might not be the best fighters, but as you're aware, they've been fighting for a very long time. And now that they're not fighting each other, they're more than happy to dedicate all of their time to fighting you. So dear Empire, to you, your idiotic mercenaries, and even that bitch, the Thirteenth Sister, we would like to say: Bring it on, mother effers! We're not goin' anywhere. From your friends, the incredibly badass and sexually attractive, Red and Blue soldiers of Project Freelancer. P.S… Suck our balls."
Once the call ended, Darth Vader stood intensely before roaring out. He turned behind him and used the Force to throw his table across the room. Once that was done, he rested for a minute before calming down.
"FILSS."
"Yes, Lord Vader?" a woman's voice asked sadly.
"Arrange for a small number of reinforcements to assist our forces on Chorus. And have Hargrove arrange to send us all the confiscated files on Project: Freelancer, especially the files on the simulation soldiers."
"Yes, Lord Vader."
"One more thing." Vader said. "Can you verify that Locus' delivery was sent to Hargrove's custody?"
"The crate from the shipwreck was unloaded and delivered this morning, sir."
FILSS showed a holographic image of an advanced UNSC helmet. It was labeled "BRAVO CRATE S6. CONTENTS: FREELANCER ARMOR [HELMET, AGENT MAINE]. STATUS: DELIVERED."
"Good. If the Chairman manages to complete this project, it will make the bounty hunters and the Thirteenth Sister obsolete." Vader said. "And if all else fails… I may have to take matters into my own hands myself."