And here we go a double update to bring this story to a close.

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There's A Place Where Lost Things Go

Chapter 16-A Little Bit Stronger (After The Rain)

The penultimate chapter-In which Jamie and his siblings talk.

"Family therapy" Danny said shaking his head looking disgusted by the very thought (which he was by the way…or at the very least very disgruntled with it). "I don't believe that man sometimes" he took another swig of scotch and then turned to look at Jamie and then.

"You get what that was like don't you? I mean you get that…that Joe and Erin and me we went insane? You get it don't you? Because when I told you that I was taking you home it was under the illusion that you knew I couldn't stand it if you ran off again"

"Yeah" Jamie said quietly. "Yeah I did but I…" there was a pause where he bit his lip and then.

"Danny I didn't plan that I was…I was looking at you and—"

"And I missed it yeah kid I know I just…I wanted so much for this to be normal?"

Jamie nodded and then.

"I guess we all have to trust each other again" he said quietly. "I have to trust that you're not gonna…be mad at me and you have to trust that if I go out I'm coming back"

"Yeah" Erin said finally. "I guess that we have to trust you and you have to trust us" she sighed and then. "Can I mention something about Mom before you start—"

"ERIN" Joe shouted suddenly but Danny was watching Jamie. His face did a complicated little spasm and then he clenched his fists together and then closed his eyes. He did a little body shudder and then opened them again.

"What Erin?"

"She knew…at the end she knew that she was…Dad was always talking about holding out hope you know"

Danny didn't scoff but it was a bare thing. Joe sighed. Erin was such a Momma's girl. which for someone who always joked she was a Daddy's girl was saying something.

"She…she wrote you a letter. She started to write it and then I finished it."

Joe shot Danny a look and he shrugged. He had not bothered to be there during the treatment, he had been adamant on that. He had been there the night when it was clear that it was going to be over but he had not done the whole holding hand through chemo thing that Erin had done. To be frank (pardon the pun) he had thought that he'd break it.

"She wrote me a letter?" Jamie said flatly.

"Yeah" Erin said looking very hangdog. "I never…Dad doesn't know. I have it…when you want it it's yours but…but it does explain a few things…I mean…I didn't get it then but…Jamie" she shook her head and then. "I want you to know that I too was so angry with her too. I was…you two didn't see me" she said looking at Danny and Joe. "Twice Jack had to drop Nikki off at yours Joe and that was because one time I was so angry I was throwing glasses at the wall and the second time because I hit the bottle of white wine and was paralytic. I was…I was so angry too I just…I couldn't not be there for her. She knew I wasn't happy with her but…but then I saw what it was doing to her, what it was doing to Dad and their marriage and…Jamie I genuinely believe if it wasn't for the cancer he'd have divorced her on the spot that night it was clear that you were gone, that Olivia's parents told us that you were gone—" she shivered and Danny swallowed bitterly. He understood where Erin was coming from.

That night his Dad had gone from frantic to rage to defeated. It had been frightening to watch him do it. The anger that had expelled seemingly from Frank Reagan's pores had been overpowering, staggering really.

Jamie stared at her for a second and then he jerked his head up and down in something that might have been a nod.

"Okay" he said quietly. "I get that Erin I do…I just…I'm not ready"

"And that's fine" Joe said shooting his sister a look. "You be ready when your ready Jamie. Were not going anywhere. We never were"

Danny put down his scotch glass. He was going to say something now he was sure he was going to regret but he was going to say it anyway.

"I don't know Jamie if I can get over why you didn't come to me" he said into the silence. "I know that you've said why and in my own way I can understand that but I don't…Jamie I really don't…I can see it and yet…" he trailed off and then blew out a big breath feeling exhausted.

"We love you kid. And we were all adults…we could have protected you and we still would. If you didn't…if you didn't get that, if you didn't get that there was Joe's place or Erin's or that I would be there with you every step of the way then I don't know what…I don't know what the hell were trying to rebuild. I don't know how you could think that we wouldn't stand by you"

"She's Mom" Jamie said as if was that simple. "She's Mom Danny. Supposed she'd said that Joe wasn't allowed to come to the house anymore while I was living there, supposed that she said she didn't want to see Nikki anymore? Supposed that Dad stripped you of your gold shield because you were—"

"THEN SHE STRIPS ME OF MY GOLD SHIELD" Joe spat so violently that Danny jumped. Joe stood up and ran a hand through his hair and then he turned.

"Kid I love you but you have to admit that you have some part in this just as much as Mom did. I know she screwed up Jamie, I know she hurt you but you chose to walk away. You could have come to any of us and you chose to walk away and I don't…I need you to accept that that was the wrong thing because I don't know if I can move on until you do. You should have come to us, you should have trusted us. No matter how badly Mom had damaged that trust you had to know that Danny and me and Erin…we would have stood by you, okay so maybe we'd have banged our heads against the walls for a bit and then showed you how to correctly put the condom on the dildo—"

Here Danny choked because he was sure as shit not gonna teach Jamie that one but Joe continued.

"But we'd have been there for you. And you basically stuck two fingers up and listened to some complete strangers. So yeah I love you Jamie but I am angry at you as well and I need you to get that before we carry on"

There was a pause and then Jamie nodded.

"Fair enough" he said and there was a calmness to him that Danny had not seen before. It was like he had been rattled and then found something that he was able to grip on and he clung to it.

"Fair enough" he said again.

"And I doubt Mom had the power to take away your Gold Shield" Danny said casually looking down the dark street. "It's a bad look for the family. Besides…I didn't do family dinners before the war I didn't do them afterwards."

Unspoken there was the ring of anger that he felt at his mother. He didn't know if that was going to go away. Joe was angry at the world, Erin angry at them because she had managed to put it all in a box…Jamie had more right than any of them to be angry but somehow Danny was the one who wanted to spit and kick and punch his way out of everything. He had always been like that and now he thought about it, it might explain a lot of his career choices.

Jamie looked at him and Danny caught his eye and they both smirked at the other. For this they were both on the same side.

"Can I still live with you Danny" he said and Danny nodded. It wasn't phrased as a question and they both knew it. Jamie had a home with his brother as long as he wanted one. Danny was going to walk over broken glass before he ever let someone push Jamie out of his family again. He didn't care who it was.

When one looked back at how he was feeling, at the raw pulse of anger that nearly threatened to cripple him maybe it was a good thing that they were going to family therapy.

Danny had to admit it beat Church. Since Afghanistan he had to admit that God and him were on a sabbatical.

"Yeah." He said finally and then he put down the glass and watched the rays of moonlight hit the thick pattern that decorated the rim—for a second he allowed himself the joy of imagining that he was smacking it and smashing it against the wall until all that was left was shards and then he spoke in a carefully controlled voice.

"You run off again and I am going to kill you" he said staring at that glass. "Because I love you Jamie, I love you more than I can say easily and I love that boy and I need you both to be safe"

Jamie nodded and then he looked up the stairs to where his son was sleeping and it threw his sharp features into focus. Now for the first time Danny could see their grandfather in his expression. Out of everyone of them it was Jamie who inherited his grandfather's sharp cheekbones.

There was a pause and then.

"I broke into the cemetery tonight and yelled at Mom's grave"

Joe snorted before he could stop himself. Danny couldn't help but laugh. Erin looked nothing short of scandalised.

God help him though Danny wished he'd had the balls to do that.

"Oh?"

"I felt better after I did it, like…like maybe the weight had been lifted. I knew suddenly that I could get better. I don't know if I can describe it but I knew that I could…I knew that I could get better. I have to get better. I have a son Danny, I…I hear what you are saying and I want to make it right for Harrison and for everyone else"

Danny shot Joe a look and Joe shrugged. Hell maybe all of them collectively yelling at his Mom's grave might do them a bit of good. Not really though—Danny had done a lot of yelling at his mother in real time.

"Family therapy" Joe said finally.

"Yep" Erin said and collectively the four of them winced.

"Maybe it will help" Jamie said smirking slightly.

Danny considered if he was capable of having another drink but he knew well enough that if he did then he was going to feel it tomorrow. He was on that cusp of stop now and recover or drink yourself into oblivion. And oblivion right now meant a deep dark hole he liked to call Afghanistan.

"Well" he said finally sitting down in the old battered armchair and kicking his feet up.

"It can't make things worse"

Jamie laughed and Joe jumped up then and hugged him. Danny knew that he would hug the shit out of his brother when he was sure he was not also going to shake him until his teeth rattled. God if this was what teenagers were like then he and Linda needed to have a talk about kids very, very soon.

There was a pause and then.

"So you wanna tell us about the girl or do we have to guess?"

"Her name is Eddie"
"Aha"

Jamie grinned suddenly sharp and bright and more youthful than he had been in a while.

"I think I'm in love"

Danny sighed.

Yeah…he was so not ready for kids.

And there you go, hope you enjoy, see you soon.

Next Chapter-THE FINAL CHAPTER-After trouble and strife and all that comes with for the first time in nearly two years the Reagan family sit down for dinner.