Chapter 46: The Colors are so Bright
Tails slowly opened his eyes to gaze up at the ceiling in the small bedroom of Chuck's old barn. Rubbing his face with his gloved hands, the orange fox slowly pulled himself out of bed. Glancing over at the Miles Electric sitting on the bedside table, he noted the time of 7 AM and Sonic's absence, likely due to his morning run.
Yawning, the young kitsune grabbed his tablet and made his way to the nearby kitchenette to find himself an expired packet of instant oatmeal to prepare in the barn's decades old microwave. Mixing its contents with a cup of water, he nuked his breakfast and brought it to the desk where, the night before, he had extracted vital information from Eggman's network using Metal Chris as a conduit. That was, of course, before Shadow not only abducted Chris but acquired their entire supply of Chaos Emeralds as well, using Tails' life as a bargaining chip to acquire the mystical gems.
"Well, we're not under attack…at least not yet…" Tails sat down in his chair and took his first bite of oatmeal. "So Eggman's not slap dashing together an ill-conceived scheme? I guess we won't know until he plays his cards." Without knowing the location of his base of operations, coupled with the fact that he and Sonic remained wanted by the United States government, all they could do now was wait.
As Tails took a second bite of his oatmeal, Sonic skid to a stop just feet behind him, the orange fox hardly batting an eye.
"How was the run, Sonic?" Tails asked.
"Eh," Sonic replied as he shrugged his shoulders. "It was alright. How'd ya sleep?"
"Fine," Tails replied with a yawn. "Any word?"
"About Egghead?" Sonic asked, peering down at his little brother before shaking his head. "Nada."
"Well, if I were Eggman," Tails replied as he spotted the remote to the nearby television hanging from the wall, "I'd announce my plans on every television throughout the world. After all, he does have all the Chaos Emeralds now, so I bet he feels nigh on unstoppable."
"So we're gonna watch TV all day?" Sonic asked.
"More or less," Tails replied as he flipped through the channels. He eventually landed on CNN. "If Eggman's gonna target any channel, it's gonna be a 24/7 network."
"I guess I'll go get the popcorn," Sonic replied.
"Who says we can't do a bit of multitasking?" Tails pulled his trusty screwdriver from his namesakes. "Might as well listen to the talking heads while fixing up the Helengelion."
"Oh yeah, Metal Chris really did a number on Helen's mech," Sonic replied.
"Would you mind helping me out?" Tails asked as his namesakes fluttered from behind, knowing his big brother wouldn't turn him down.
"Sure thing!" Sonic replied with a thumbs up. "Best make myself useful if it's too risky to go back to civilization."
"Yeah, you said it," Tails replied. "Plus, I have a feeling the Helengelion may come in handy in the near future." The Fox pushed away the table in the center of the barn, giving him more room to work on the mech, which was reverted into its wheelchair form.
"Good thing Helen has a spare," Sonic noted.
"I'll say," Tails replied with a nod as he rolled it into the center of the room. Pressing the required button combination on the wheelchair's armrest, he stepped back as it transformed into the Helengelion, lying on its back and still scorched from its previous deployment. From there, the orange kitsune started his preliminary inspection to determine the scope of the damage.
"I don't know how I feel about Helen getting involved any further," Sonic said. "She could really get hurt out there."
"Oh, I know," Tails replied with a nod once more. "I have no intention of having her fight whatever Eggman has planned for us, especially now that he has the Chaos Emeralds, but the Helengelion will prove to be a vital asset nevertheless if it comes down to it. If she needs to escape danger, help others flee dangerous situations, or directly engage if push comes to shove, at least she'd have a fighting chance."
"Makes sense," Sonic replied. "Still, I can't help but feel for her parents."
"I know what you mean," Tails replied with a sigh. "I bet it's stressful enough having her associated with wanted fugitives, let alone the impending situation with Eggman."
A few minutes of silence ensued as the blue hedgehog watched his little brother maneuver his way around the large mech, making various fixes to get the machine operational. Tails intentionally ignored visual imperfections, instead focusing on getting the Helengelion functional.
"So about me makin' myself useful…" Sonic placed his hands behind his back, watching from above as Tails continued his repairs underneath the Helengelion.
"Oh, ummm…could you get me the torch?"
"Got it," Sonic replied as he sped across the room, returning to Tails' feet sticking out from underneath the mech. "Here ya go!"
"That was quick," Tails replied with a smirk, stating the obvious for the blue hedgehog's own amusement.
"What'd you expect?" Sonic shrugged his shoulders as a grin formed across his muzzle. "So now what?"
Tails began using the torch on the side of the Helengelion to heat up the metal plating on the side of the mech. "You could maybe find me the bowl of mints Grandpa hid from me."
"You can't just smell them out?" Sonic asked, his hands on his waist.
"Surprisingly not," Tails replied as he scratched his chin with his gloved hand. "It's entirely possible that Chuck took them back with him to Helen's place, but I couldn't detect the scent of mint on him at all."
"Well yeah, it's because he always smells like the devil's lettuce," Sonic replied, pinching his nose for comedic effect.
"Wait, that's it!" Tails exclaimed. "Sonic, are you brave enough to search the basement?"
"Oh, you don't mean…" Sonic approached Tails' ear and whispered, "…Chuck's secret stash?"
"Exactly," Tails nodded. "The smell of the marijuana is probably why I can't detect the bowl with my nose, so if there's anywhere Chuck would've hidden it, it would be down there."
"Alright," Sonic replied as he stuck a clothespin on his nose, "I'll venture down there. Be back n' a flash!"
The blue hedgehog ran outside and around the corner. He opened the cellar door and climbed down the rickety stairs to find a basement full of various bags and boxes, all of which had the unmistakable odor associated with marijuana.
Sonic grimaced as he peered around to find some sort of container that wasn't like the others, but thankfully, his search didn't take long; in a lone corner of the basement was an unorganized desk full of various tax forms and the prized bowl of mints.
"Hmmm, these do look a bit funny," Sonic noted as he plucked one of the candies from the bowl. He stared at the orange cube before plopping it into his mouth, thoughtfully chewing. "But they taste fine enough." Shrugging his shoulders, the blue hedgehog ventured back up the stairs and brought the bowl to his little brother.
"…This isn't my candy," Tails complained. "In fact, I don't think I've seen these before." The orange fox brought a green-colored cube to his muzzle and plopped the candy into his mouth. While chewing, he asked, "You found these in the cellar?"
"Yep," Sonic replied with a nod. "I couldn't find your mints, though." The blue hedgehog grabbed a few more pieces and plopped them into his mouth simultaneously.
"You don't think these are..."
"It's just candy, dude," Sonic replied. "Just because it was stored with Chuck's pot doesn't mean it's suspicious."
Tails stared at the bowl once more before grabbing a handful, combining multiple colors to further enhance the flavor.
"Hey, I'm getting a bit drowsy," Sonic replied with a yawn, "mind if we watch some TV or somethin'?"
"Drowsy, at this time of day?" Tails noted the early morning time.
"Apparently," Sonic replied with a shrug.
"Alrighty." Thinking nothing of it, the young fox brought the bowl of candy to the bedroom, where Sonic and Tails began flipping through the channels on the Miles Electric as they sat upright in bed.
The Night Before…
Using the power of Chaos Control, Shadow the Hedgehog fled Chuck's barn with everything she came for and then some, not only nabbing the mystical Chaos Emeralds but also the lifeless, mechanical body of Chris Thorndyke, still deactivated since Tails booted him down to sift through the files on Eggman's network.
Shadow's destination was now the Egg Carrier, flying seemingly aimless over the Pacific Ocean. The fragrance of the salt water below filled her nose, and the gentle ocean waves could be heard through the relatively quiet engines powering the airborne fortress.
"Now where could the Doctor be?" Shadow peered around the expanses of the ship's deck, but he was nowhere to be found. The ebony hedgehog searched the ship, dragging Chris along for the ride, until she eventually found Eggman asleep in a floaty in the center of a swimming pool. He was wearing sunglasses despite the room being completely enclosed, and he was wearing nothing but swimming trunks, his hands resting on his belly as his orange mustache quivered to the rhythm of his snoring.
"Ehem…" Shadow cleared her throat in the hopes this would awaken the relaxed doctor, but Eggman remained asleep. Unwilling to give up, the ebony hedgehog pulled out a megaphone from her hammerspace. "Ehem!"
Eggman leapt out of his floaty in fright, falling into the pool below. Resurfacing a few moments later, Eggman spit water out of his mouth like a fancy fountain. "What the hell kind of stunt was that, Shadow?"
"Excuse my interruption, Doctor, but I've got something to show you."
"This better be worth it…" Eggman grumbled before clearing his throat. "Decoe, Bocoe!"
The two robotic assistants rushed to the pool room, standing single file over the ledge of the pool as they gave the evil doctor a military-style salute.
"Decoe, help me out of the water, and Bocoe, fetch me my towel."
"Aye, aye, doctor," they replied. Decoe bent his mechanical legs and extended his arm, allowing Eggman to grab his hand. Meanwhile, Bocoe retrieved a stack of clean towels. Eggman sat down in a white plastic chair and padded his face dry.
"Well, Shadow, did you bring me results?"
"Most certainly, Doctor," Shadow replied, a grin across her muzzle as she strewed the remaining Chaos Emeralds across the plastic table. "And as an added bonus…" Shadow pointed to Chris' lifeless body on the pool room floor.
"I don't care about that dead weight," Eggman replied. He pulled his Chaos Emeralds from the pockets of his trunks, placing them on the table next to the others. The seven gems radiated a brilliant glow filling the pool room with a rainbow of color.
"Absolutely magnificent, Shadow!" Eggman exclaimed. "You've far exceeded my expectations!"
"What can I say?" Shadow replied. "I was created by your ancestor, after all."
"Dear ol' Grandpa Robotnik, helping his grandson from the grave." Eggman grinned.
"So, what's your next move, Doctor?" Shadow asked.
"The moment you've been waiting for," Eggman replied, placing a hand on the ebony hedgehog's shoulder. "You vowed to get revenge on the inhabitants of Earth since they destroyed our family, and with the unmatched power of the Chaos Emeralds and the Space Colony Ark, we will make your dream a reality."
"Very good," Shadow replied with a nod, folding her arms in satisfaction as she cracked a smile.
Bzzzz. Bzzz Bzzzzzt.
"Hmm?" Eggman peered over at the mechanical body of Chris. "Does the boy have some life in him yet?"
"He was plugged into Tails' computer when I retrieved him," Shadow replied, "so it's likely they manipulated him in some way or even extracted some of the data in his hard drive."
"Even if they knew of my plans," Eggman replied with a grin, "it's too late for them to stop me now. Wooahhooohoohooo!"
"E-egg…ma…aannn…"
"What's this?" The evil doctor peered down at Chris, who struggled to lift his head. "Did you just talk?"
"Y-you w-won't get…a…away…w-with this…"
"So the brats restored your cognitive functions, aye?" Eggman asked. "Looks like they roughed you up pretty good, too. Can't say I blame them, you annoying runt."
"What should we do with him?" Shadow asked. "I can take him out before he becomes a liability."
"No," Eggman replied with a smirk. "I've got a better idea." The evil doctor stood up. "Come, and bring Chris with you."
"Right." Shadow nodded as she pulled the mechanical human over her right shoulder and started following Eggman out of the pool room, the evil scientist leaving wet footprints behind. They traversed the Egg Carrier until they reached the command center where Robotnik slipped into his signature attire. "Now set Chris in the pilot chair."
"Are you sure about this?" Shadow asked, tilting her head in confusion.
"Trust, my dear friend," Eggman replied with a twisted smirk.
Shadow did as she was told, placing the roboticized human in the chair.
Eggman unlatched a hidden compartment on the side of Chris' head, an opening which covered several slots. Pulling a wire out from the Egg Carrier's dashboard, he hooked him up, causing Chris' lifeless metallic eyes to flash green with random numbers until his pupils went red, staring directly ahead.
"While the humans down below are having trouble with even the most rudimentary self-driving cars," Eggman gloated, "I've perfected my AI machinations to fly my own ships!" Eggman massaged his orange mustache. "But that's not all, for you see, this isn't just any ordinary airship…." The evil doctor pressed a red button on the dashboard, causing the ship to start tilting upward as a timer played on the intercom. "You still know your way around the Space Colony Ark?" Eggman asked.
"Yes, but…" Shadow peered around. "Wait…you don't mean to tell me this thing can fly us into space?"
"I know right?" Eggman chuckled. "I even surprise myself sometimes!"
"5….4…3…2…1…blast off imminent."
Chris Thorndyke, under the control of the airship itself, pulled back on the wheel, allowing the Egg Carrier to ascend higher into the sky until it was completely vertical. Flames erupted at the base of the ship, allowing enough juice to launch itself through the Earth's atmosphere.
"Of course, I haven't had the opportunity to test this function," Eggman said, "but I'm sure it will work. My calculations are never wrong."
"If only he used those same calculations against Sonic," Decoe whispered to Bocoe, earning a chuckle from his robotic brother.
"I heard that," Eggman complained, "but…I'll let you off with a warning. I'm feeling rather jolly mood, after all."
"Wow, that's uncharacteristic," Bocoe replied.
"Don't let it get to your head," Eggman said before turning to Shadow once more. "Now…once we arrive, we will need to power up the Ark, dust off the cobwebs, and then prepare our little…announcement. Wooahhooohoohooo!"
Eggman's laughter filled the command center as the Egg Carrier broke the Earth's atmosphere, flying closer and closer to the old space colony lifelessly orbiting around the planet.
"Woahhh, dude…"
Sonic stared blankly at the Miles Electric resting below as he sat slouched in bed against the frame.
"You, like…seein' colors, lil' buddy?"
"Me?" Tails asked, his speech less slurred than Sonic's but still less comprehensible than normal. "What are you, like…talking about, Sonic? We see color, like…all the time. We don't have monochromatic vision, ya goofball. Huehuehuehue…" The young fox playfully elbowed Sonic's side.
"I know we can, like, normally see…colors, bruh," Sonic replied, playing with Tails' hair with his gloved palm. "But like…do you…see colors?"
"Like I said," Tails replied, "we always…see colors." The orange kitsune applied air quotes with his fingers.
"No, man…like…" Sonic shook his head. "Do you see…colors…man? Like…bright lights and…colors all 'round?"
"You lost me…wait…" Tails slouched back even further, his head gently bobbing back and forth. "Y-yeah, I can see it now. Your words have, like…colors, man…"
"I knew I could get…through to ya…" Sonic nodded his head slowly, his red eyes gazing at the ceiling. "Hey Tails, what do you think is…like…happenin' right now?"
"You drugged us," Tails replied.
"Whaaaaaaaaa…nooooooo," Sonic replied as he chuckled.
"Those candies had THC in them," Tails replied. "I should've known eating candy from Chuck's marijuana stash was a bad idea."
"Hey man, loosen up a lil…" Sonic patted Tails' tubby belly. "We can't undo it, so let's just enjoy the high."
"I guess you're right," Tails replied as he stared up at the ceiling. "W-woah…pretty colors."
"See?" Sonic smirked as he wrapped a single arm behind Tails' shoulder. "Enjoy the show."
"Hey…what's on now?" Tails pointed down at the Miles Electric sitting on their legs. "Is that…Eggman?"
"Whuuuh?" Sonic rubbed his eyes and peered down as well.
"It could be the drugs creating an illusion in my mind," Tails clarified.
"No, I see 'im too," Sonic replied as he turned up the volume.
"Listen up, ladies and gentlemen," Eggman began. "I've come to make an announcement."
"Oh boy," Sonic replied. "Here we go with the ego."
"Maybe…if his ego wasn't as big….as his butt…" Tails started laughing. "…Then…then…what was I saying?" The young kitsune peered up at Sonic, his head tilted in confusion.
"You were talking about Eggman's ginormous rear end," Sonic replied, using his hands to form a dramatized shape of the evil doctor's backside. Sonic and Tails laughed once more as Eggman continued his speech.
"I am now in complete and total control of a little-known orbital space station which has been dormant for over 50 years thanks to a top-secret government cover-up. Unbeknownst to most of you, this station just so happens to have a powerful superweapon capable of causing massive damage to the Earth."
"You cause enough damage when you sit down," Sonic joked, causing Tails to laugh profusely.
"In fact, I'm going to give a little…demonstration." Eggman snapped his finger, signaling to the cameramen (Decoe and Bocoe) to focus on Shadow, who pressed a few buttons on a large control panel, positioned a joystick, and pressed a big red button. Finally, the feed cut to a live shot of the moon, where the viewers at home were treated to the powerful intimidating threat by the evil doctor; within seconds, a large laser decimated a large chunk of the moon, sending debris in all directions.
"Of course," Eggman continued as the feed transitioned back to him, "I consider myself to be a reasonable man. I'd rather not completely shatter the planet that I wish to rule. To that end, I'm willing to offer a deal: to the President of the United States, you must seed all power to me. If you're too much of a chicken to initiate such an executive order, you will have 24 hours to seek approval to dismantle your country's Constitution. That means getting the states and Congress to come to a consensus."
"For every day you fail to abide by my demands," Eggman continued as he massaged his mustache, "I will take out random population centers around the United States. After a week, I shall start targeting other areas of the globe." Eggman smirked as he raised a finger. "And to President Michael Kennedy: you and the entire Washington political establishment have funded such a large military that their might, ruled by me, will be more than enough to conquer the entire world, which I shall henceforth refer to as "Planet Eggman"!
"Eggman needs a writer," Tails commented.
"A writer, a personal bather, a dietician, a therapist," Sonic listed off using the individual digits of his gloved hand.
"I will only answer calls directly from the White House. Any other calls will be strictly ignored. Now…" Eggman took a bow. "I bid you farewell, for the next time you see me, I will be your ultimate ruler."
The screen went black.
"No more pretty colors," Sonic complained.
"Ahh, man," Tails replied as he snapped his fingers.
"Well…" Sonic pulled himself out of bed. "I guess we gotta go stop Eggman, huh?"
"Sonic, no," Tails replied, picking himself out of bed as well and pulling the blue hedgehog's arm. "That's a terrible idea."
"Wow," Sonic replied as he raised a single brow in astonishment. "You're not usually a jerk." The blue hedgehog shifted his focus to the reader. "And this is your brain on pot!"
"No," Tails said, ignoring Sonic's fourth wall breaking shenanigans. "I mean, like…we're basically…out of commission, right?"
"How so?" Sonic asked as he stared at the corner on the opposite side of the room.
"Sonic, I'm over here," Tails said as he waved.
"Oh?" The blue hedgehog spun around. "Right, m'bad…" Sonic scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.
"We're too…messed up to do anything," Tails concluded. "We've just gotta…get through…this and hope we still have time to stop Eggman before…it's too late."
Ring Ring…ring ring…
"Ah shoot…" Sonic peered down at his wristwatch communicator. "It's Amy."
"I bet she watched Eggman's announcement too," Tails replied.
"What do I do, lil' bro?" Sonic asked frantically, grabbing Tails' arms. "She can't see me like this."
Tails thought for a few moments. "Here, give me your watch." The orange kitsune extended out his arm.
Without question, the blue blur unclicked the communicator from his wrist and handed it over to his little brother. Tails then put it on over his own communicator and answered the call.
"Hello? Tails," Amy began. "Where's Sonic?"
"Ummmmm…"
"May I speak with him, please?"
"Oh, ummm…" Amy gave Tails a concerned glare through the image displayed on her watch. "He's…not available right now."
"What do you mean?" Amy asked. "Did he go on a run?"
"No…"
"Is he eating a plate of chili dogs?"
"I wish," Sonic replied.
"Hey, was that Sonic?" Amy asked as she studied Tails' feed.
"Yeah…" Tails admitted.
"So let me talk to him, it's very important!" Amy commanded.
"I'm afraid I can't let you do that," he replied in a monotone voice.
"Why not?" Amy started to grow impatient. "Look, Eggman just announced a plan to bring the entire government to its knees, so it's of the utmost importance that we strategize to prevent Eggman from causing any more damage."
"I agree," Tails replied with a nod.
"Then put Sonic on the damn phone!" Amy ordered.
"I can't."
"Why not, Tails?" Amy was nearly at her limit.
"Because…"
"Because why?!"
"Because…" Tails couldn't control the laughter building up inside. "Because he's fuckin' baked!"
"…What?" Amy was dumbfounded, both by Tails' potty mouth and his unorthodox claim.
"You heard me," Tails replied. "He's as high as a kite, and so am I."
"Are you saying you guys took drugs?" Amy asked judgmentally.
"In my defense," Sonic replied, appearing by Tails' side, "it was an…accident."
"How do you get high by accident?"
"We thought…" Sonic couldn't hold in his laughter either. "We thought we were eating…mint candies!" Sonic laughed uncontrollably.
"I'm afraid we're basically out of commission for the moment," Tails added. "I'm not about to fly under the influence, but maybe you could gather up all our friends and have them meet us at the farm?" The orange fox peered over at Sonic, who was rolling on the floor laughing.
Amy pinched the ridge of her nose in frustration. "Fine. I guess that's what I was thinking anyway. I'll call on everyone to gather there to form our emergency plan. I'll also try to find something to get you two through your high as quick as possible."
"Oh, Ames?" Sonic interrupted.
"Yes?" Amy replied impatiently.
"Can you bring us some Taco Bell?"
"Yeah, and some Mountain Dew Baja Blasts?" Tails added.
"Those Doritos Locos Tacos are pretty tubular…" Sonic rubbed his belly with his gloved palm.
"And don't forget about their nacho fries, available for a limited time!" Tails exclaimed as he raised a single finger to the air.
"Fine," Amy replied tersely.
"Thanks, tuts," Sonic replied. "Love ya."
"Yeah, whatever…" Amy disconnected the call.
"Ooooohhhhh, someone's in troubllllle!" Tails jeered.
"Ehhh, it's Amy we're talkin' 'bout," Sonic replied, waving his arm casually. "She never stays mad for long. Now c'mon…" Sonic sat back in bed next to his little brother, bringing the half-eaten bowl of candies to his lap, eating a handful. "Let's enjoy the colors s'more, m'kay?"
The orange fox scooted closer to his big brother, grabbed a single gummy, and studied it, weighing the pros and cons of prolonging his high amidst a potential global calamity.
"Ehhh…screw it."