I've always felt the show missed a very important conversation between Elizabeth and Henry in season six. Here is my take on it.

Henry,

I know this is a cowardly way of doing this, but I was afraid I would chicken out if I said this to you. But I want to give you an out. I understand how hurt you are. I'm so sorry I didn't see it. Struggling with what the greater good is can be exhausting. And I understand that I am part of why you are so exhausted. I have failed you in so many ways. I am not asking you to forgive me.

You have your reasons. I respect them. You are so good. You always try to do what is right. I also was trying to do what was right. Dmitri died. We sent him to his death. A person you cared for. And I was forced to protect Ukraine. And in doing so, I hurt you.

Henry, you are the absolute love of my life. And I know you. I knew how badly this would hurt you when I was in that negotiation room. I should have fought harder. I know that you see everything on a strict moral compass. And I also know that you continuously strive for perfection of morality. The world that exists for me in shades of gray tends to contrast more in your eyes. I don't know if that means your heart is purer than mine or if it's another metaphor. You're the philosopher in our marriage.

One thing I do know is that if it would make you happy again, I will leave. I would rather live life alone, without you knowing you were happy than spend a life with you feeling as if you are trapped because you are too good a man to leave. I love you beyond words. And while I have no fancy quotes, I do have the loved and lost things. I would love you all over again in this life.

But contrasting with that, I would also do the same thing in Geneva again. Maybe that makes me horrible. Maybe it just means we no longer share a value system. Maybe this job has made me blind to certain deaths. Because I could look at Dmitri and see him as just another death in the face of millions. Maybe I have become so cold, so unfeeling. If I have, that is something I can live with. The fact is, the world needs people who can do what Conrad and I did. People who are willing to make the hard calls. The sacrifices. It's just unfortunate that you are the type of person who is incapable of that.

I am so sorry that you got caught up in all of this. I never wanted to hurt you. And if you want me to go, I will go.

I hope you know that no matter what, I love you. I am yours and will always be yours. Getting to love and be loved by you has been the gift of a lifetime. You have been my greatest and truest friend.

Love Always,

Elizabeth

Henry's hands are shaking by the time he's done reading. He doesn't know what emotion is causing it. Anger? Regret? Fear? Maybe it's the special combination of all three. When Elizabeth wrote this letter, she intended it to be the last act of their marriage. He thinks back to that time in their lives. It felt for him as if the world had slipped off kilter. They were fighting. They fought all of the time. And when they weren't fighting, they were ignoring the pain. And the silence was even worse.

He didn't know how to fix them. And he remembers that last fight at the farmhouse. The one where he admitted he was so hurt that he couldn't even look at her. And he remembers her begging him for marriage counseling. And he remembers when he finally agreed to it. This letter isn't dated, and he doesn't know when she wrote it. But if she had shown him this letter, it would have destroyed their relationship.

And in some ways, she is right. The Henry of those days would have left. It would have been so tempting. He had wanted her to be something that she wasn't. But even in therapy, she had confided in him about how scared she was he wanted to leave. She thought their relationship was falling apart.

He can't remember exactly what happened, but he remembers them finding their way back to each other. He remembers when he could look at her again without guilt. He remembers that night in Finland when they finally got Dmitri back, and everything was right again. Their bodies and souls became one again that night.

He can't imagine the strength it must have taken for her to write this letter—the amount of love for him. The selflessness. To be willing to let him go so that he could find peace. That night in Finland had been a promise. They were in it together no matter what the world threw at them. He needs to see her.

He finds himself jogging to the Oval. It's not at all something he should be doing. The First Gentleman should not interrupt the President of the United States during a workday. But he doesn't care. All he cares about is seeing her.

"She free?" He questions Blake impatiently.

"Yes, Dr. McCord."

"I don't want to be disturbed."

"Yes, Sir," Blake responds, and Henry pushes into the office.

Elizabeth is standing in the window, looking out over the South Lawn. She is thinking about something intense. Her jaw is set, and her brow is furrowed. Henry wonders what has caused the change. What has been upsetting her? He knows her so well. Knows her moods. Knows her reactions. But he doesn't know what is wrong right now.

"Hey, Babe?" He speaks softly. Her shoulders instantly relax, and she turns to him with a small smile.

"Hey, yourself," she answers. She is still tense, and Henry knows something big is going on. Something serious. He takes her hand and pulls her down to the couch with him.

"How's the state of the World?" He questions. He has to get her talking. He needs to get her out of her head.

"It's fine. North Korea is acting up, and China is enabling it… but you know… that's the world."

"What else is wrong?" He asks knowingly. Elizabeth could handle North Korea in her sleep.

"Nothing," she says unconvincingly.

"Is it Dmitri? And Stevie? The fact that they're together?" Henry questions. She's had a hard time with Dmitri and Stevie getting closer. Watching their daughter fall in love with him has been hard for her. He thinks that's why she had the letter out. He knows she has leftover guilt for what happened.

"It's not fair. I know that it's not fair for me to want that kid out of my life. But Henry... When I look at him, all I can't think about is what I put him through. And then I worry... I worry about Stevie being someone who went through all that trauma and is a recovering addict, and that... well, it makes me feel even worse. And I know that he's a great guy. But..."

"You don't like that he has a lot of baggage..." Henry says.

"It's not just his baggage. It's ours, too. It seriously doesn't bother you? What we did to him was unforgivable. And he holds our daughter's heart in his hands... And if he wanted to, he could crush her just like he's been crushed. And I know it's not a fair thought to have about him. And God, Stevie is so in love and so happy. But..." She trails off. Henry swallows. He knows that Elizabeth doesn't like Dmitri being around. She didn't like it when he went to Arizona to visit him. She didn't like it when he brought him back to DC to work for him at SAD. She didn't like it when he visited Dmitri in rehab. She didn't like when Dmitri started dating Stevie for the first time. They had never talked about it. Talking about Dmitri always turns into a fight for them. It's always a sore spot.

"Elizabeth... It wasn't..." Henry says. Elizabeth nods, but the tears are filling her eyes.

"I know. You don't have to say it. I know what we did was wrong. And I know it's not Dmitri's fault. And I know it's not fair to blame him for the issues in our marriage... but God, Henry... It's so much easier than blaming myself. So much easier than accepting that maybe, just maybe, I'm not as good a person as I've convinced myself I am. Or you've convinced yourself I am."

"Hey," Henry whispers, wiping the tear from her cheek. "You are not a terrible person. You were faced with an awful choice. And you made the best decision you could. And the fact that it still haunts you proves you are a good person. A wonderful person. I wish I had been more understanding. I wish I could have seen how difficult it was for you. I wish I hadn't reacted so badly."

"You were traumatized." She whispers. That's something they've never acknowledged. How deeply his trauma ran. He was the one who was forced to kill a person he cared about, even if they eventually got him back. He was the one whose morals were shaken. He was the one who struggled in his relationship with her. He was the one whose entire worldview and sense of self shifted. He had nightmares for months. He couldn't look at her without feeling sick. She had watched his pain and had tried to help him. But she didn't know what to do. They were both suffering.

"Yeah... I don't think that excuses how I treated you." Henry admits. They had both moved on without truly apologizing. And maybe that's why this still affects them so deeply. Maybe they have been carrying this pain and this guilt for so long that it's just seeped into every aspect of their lives. "I found this." He says, handing her the letter that she had left on the coffee table that morning. He watches her eyes widen. She swallows and shakes her head.

"That is not at all what I want. Not anymore." She insists. She doesn't even bother opening the letter. She knows what's in it. She knows what she wrote. "We were hurting. We were broken. You were grieving. I was trying to make you understand my decisions. And maybe, yeah, I wanted to hurt you. Maybe a little. But the point is moot now. We're okay now... Right?" She asks nervously. Henry can't stand the doubt in her voice.

"I'm not leaving. Are you?" He questions.

"God, no."

"Then, we're okay." He pulls her into his arms. And they sit there in silence for a moment, enjoying the feeling of each other, enjoying the calmness and peace that comes with being close to each other.

"We need to talk about this, though." He says gruffly. Whether they like it or not, Dmitri will soon be a permanent fixture in their lives. In Stevie's life. And it's something that is going to be affecting their marriage for the foreseeable future. And as much as they would like to bury their heads in the sand, they must deal with this.

"Yeah... we do," Elizabeth sighs, pulling away. She looks into his eyes. He's waiting for her to take the lead. He always waits for her to take the lead. "I don't like the feelings he stirs up in me. And I feel like I can't share that with you... because I don't want to hurt you. So, I keep it to myself. But I know it affects us. How it affects you."

"I get that... I feel this need to take care of him. He went through this awful thing because I talked him into spying for the US. And I was supposed to protect him. But then I stayed in the van, Elizabeth. And he's fine. Now. But then he was tortured for months. And he still has PTSD. And I worry. I also worry about him and Stevie, but how can I rip them apart? How am I supposed to destroy their happiness for my guilt? But then, sometimes, I'll see or think about him, and the pain returns. And the anger."

"Henry... What we did was awful. And we both carry the burden of that guilt. But the reality is that it's a decision we both would make again." Elizabeth admits. He nods. Because it's true, Elizabeth would give him up, and he would stay in the van. And in the end, they saved him. But maybe they're both a little broken because of it.

"I'm so sorry." She whispers. Henry takes her hand in his. He looks into her eyes. The same fiery blue eyes he has loved for over thirty years. He feels so much love. Love and admiration for the woman in front of him. The woman who loves him unconditionally. He's spent the past few weeks angry. Angry at himself. Angry at her. Angry at Dmitri for daring to come back into their lives through Stevie.

"I'm sorry, too. And I'm not going anywhere, and neither are you." He smiles and kisses her. "I love you."

"I love you." She smiles and kisses him again. And the rest of the world melts away.