Yasunori Mitsuda - Where The Eggs Of Dreams Hatch

The Lost Years, Part Four

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…Fate already dicted Frigg and her people to be born and bequeath of the Vastita blood, because their parents and ancestors were also Vastitas.

Frigg didn't know who she was, because the destiny said to be dependent on her own choices didn't exist. To choose who you are, on your own, to follow your destiny? That was something a Vastita could not do, because no one has a 'self', since the family was in charge to avoid the newborns to develop one. If Frigg didn't know to follow her own path, didn't know how to develop a 'self', then what about choosing the destiny of the 'other', like the 'other' had done all throughout her life and the lives of everyone?

By saving Gizamaluke, unable to choose of his own choices, from the same pain she wasn't able to avoid since little, Frigg understood why Kain lived for the sake of others. Not only because he felt better of himself, but because his life was tangled in a web of mutual benefit. Everyone is you, and you are everyone; The same belief persisted, with divergent meanings in both societies.

For the Bulu, the 'you' coexists in a space with other 'you', meant to be helped. The 'you' can't live without the 'you' that resides on the 'other'. The more helpful 'you' are, more of the good nature that the same 'you' were born with would grown each day; for the Vastitas, 'you' are everyone, then the 'you' that resides into the 'other' would be quiet enough to not be able to question the atrocities carried and supported by the hands of the entirety, knew as society, over the time.

If, by any chance, someone developed a 'self', then it meant more could discover their 'self', and the sense awoke on the mind of the 'you' would cause a rebellion against the method spread into the society, demanding of drastic changes that would entail the end of the control ingrained over centuries. Then, the remaining ticks would retaliate on the way they had been taught since infants. Violence is the term that means their excuse for an existence. No matter how things went, violence was there to be used by the Vastitas to accomplish their same goal.

As Frigg told by Kain, Necro, the leader of the Vastitas, who seeks destruction in constructions made against his and other king's ideals, once had contact and tried to nobble Leviathan to summon a tidal wave into a rebellion spread at the outskirts of Grignard, but the god refused to do it so, fearing that Bahamut might had punished him later the act of his had been done.

From the underworld, below the sea of Leviathan, Necro had contact with Hades, the weapon synthesizer from the same place. Not all weapons given by Hades were just swords, arrows and spears; Hades also had in his possession the beasts of Chaos. Even Necro, who claimed the beasts to him, feared them. Kain strangled it, because he had been told that Necro was 'immortal', but Frigg refuted his thought.

She told that before Necro became the king, he was one of the six Demiurges from the main Vastita reigns. When he invited the first Advent sent by Bahamut to his house and killed him, Bahamut condemned Necro to live on eternity by transferring his life into a candle. It took time for Necro to realize the truth about his punishment, and that he wouldn't live forever as he thought.

On the same way Necro lured that man to his net, Bahamut used of the same trick, to hide the truth of Necro about the candle, that didn't made the Vastita into an immortal, but instead, it did made Necro became more mortal than he was. From a single blew of a Vastita more trustful and honored as Necro, the life of his would vanish in an instant.

Condemned to live forever at his will, Necro told his people, as a King, that the only true world was where the Mist reached. They believed it, of course, as they already believed in what the other said. Its said the life of his had been long sealed into a flame by Bahamut, nowhere to be found, hid somewhere from outside the Mist. Before Necro, the Vastitas hated each other that didn't resemble them. Now, with the paranoia spread across the reigns, it became clear all Necro pursues is to hide the fact he'll die someday into the pressage of killing the others, before he die as well…

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— …Immortality disguised by mortality... If father was, at least, immortal...

— He is immortal, my Prince. As a King, Stephanus will stand still against time, as much as the myth of Kain endured until now. You'll be as immortal as your father.

— Only because I am a noble? A descendant of his?

— No, because you are Gabriel. 'Noble' is just a word to make those who are rich superior, a 'have', above the 'have nots', in other words. A King is a Noble, but a Noble is still a denomination, just a 'word' with a meaning to fulfill. Words have meaning, their own since they were created. But you, 'Gabriel'... your name, written on paper, means 'hero'. But what makes you, 'Gabriel', truly a hero? You, your brother, your father... you're all the same in blood, that's true, yet you are still fellow Burmecians. But you wonder, what is a Burmecian? Before Kain came to reunificate its people, our ancestors, the word 'Burmecia' and the designation given to its people, both didn't ever bothered to exist on paper, but instead they awaited within the mind of those who believed in a better place, to be called home.

— And this home is where I was born. And the one who gave me this name...

— When you were born, Racquel had already decided what was going to be your name. She choose Gabriel, because you stood within her as a hero for an entire month, like your father stood fighting for Burmecia. Since then, you've been called Gabriel. But 'Gabriel' ain't just the name of a hero. Unlike words, only the persons can find for themselves what they do mean, beyond the name. But when they aren't able to do so, their souls are easily manipulated by what the other thinks, by the words. The Vastitas believed they were 'empty' because such 'emptiness' drove them alive, as they believed, and were taught to believe. In fact, it was all just a way to allow their emptiness to be filled in by more of the same emptiness. The 'have nots' wanted the abundance of such 'haves' to be gone. No one is better than yours, nor you're better than anyone. All Vastitas felt empty, well, except for one...

— Frigg...

...

…Kain had such abundance he carried throughout his life. By abundance, it means his feelings, emotions... qualities of a being. He didn't accept what the entity knew as Necro had done, and would never forgive its actions. Kain once thought of the same when he heard about the Vastitas for the first time, when he was a child.

Now, as he grew up, his thoughts changed considerably, and more with the days. To be instructed by Bahamut to save its people, people... To think the Vastitas were 'people' all the time. Helpless people, pleading to live, ever since the day they were born, no matter how.

As said once before, they didn't even live, but survived. To attain 'Life' was their goal. Life, for the Vastitas, only happened when they died, for good. Then, what was that life, the same one whose souls hanged on until the end? That life, spent below the Mist, was the one you learn to live, before you could truly attain the Life awaiting for you in the after. All Vastitas lives were the same, because they were born, grew, learned, killed and had children in the same place, this place belonging to the Mist, its true ruler, and the lands where the rain was secluded in a seldom state.

Frigg learned to 'live' such 'life' with the shadow of their beliefs slowly overcoming her as a whole. The fear, the pain, the anger... to be hurt, and feel nothing; to keep everything felt inside that stalwart skin. A reason enough to be afraid of the shadows, both always following you with your same steps.

That's one of the reasons why Frigg gave Gizamaluke a life she never had, an opportunity for her son to grew with another life, instead of growing up on the same way as his mother; to be given another world to belong, the same where Kain grew within, a place where the bright sun could vanquish such persistent bit of shadow present on every one of the Vastitas.

Kain, Gizamaluke and Frigg... Was Fate who kept them as one? Frigg wanted to live more honestly with herself. She wanted to live with Gareth, the one who had what she had not, lost in the process of belonging to Vastita. What Gareth had, was the same as his son and Kain had. Everytime that shadow insisted to rise and keep its owner in a strife with another, the one who was hurt most was Frigg herself. That's why Frigg didn't hesitate to attack, or to reject Kain, but instead, she accepted he and Gizamaluk, the lost son, into her arms.

The only one who Frigg's shadow never harmed was Gareth, and his son, who shared his father's will to keep on within this world, even on such desperate situations. Kain, as Gareth, would never keep for himself its 'Frater', but he would instead share it with the others who needed it most. If Frigg had realized it sooner...

No 'sorry' was pleaded that night once. Frigg had her own way to answer the questions given by, and she already had forgiven Kain. She tried to force a smile, but that wasn't enough, though it was the first smile shed in years. Frigg was willing to help Kain in any way she could, as her son once had done, to find a way to recognize herself and do the same for the people she lived within the Mist.

To bring Life instead of a life, to live in the sun over the shadows of the past; that was the goal of the one who Bahamut assisted Kain. Either man or woman, Frigg was the one Vastita meant to bring an end to the suffering and dependance brought by the lineage that stood over the centuries.

All that was left was for the Reunification to happen, and the souls to be cleansed, was to fight against Necro. Being the leader of Vastitas, the centerpiece of their beliefs, such the fragility of Necro's life was disguised by the same protection given by his people, and the Red Masks whom he hanged over control as the 'Drive' he gave to them. Paranoid of himself, the trust of Necro was left on anyone, not even on his most loyal men, like Frigg. His life was hidden somewhere, and only he and god knew where.

In a dream, Kain asked Bahamut where the candle holding of Necro's life were hid, and Bahamut answered that, before he could find it, first he needed a sword called Durandal. The same sword belonged to Siegfried, his whereabouts unknown, but Kain believed he was still a captive at Klaire.

On the next day, the last of his days at Pathos, Kain decided to go away from there and go to Klaire, but not alone. Without wearing a piece of her red armor, whose clothes of the same color once were responsible to harm Gizamaluke, Frigg followed Kain, as her son did the same. On the way, a group of Red Masks obliterated their way to reach the exit of the reign. Unrecognizable for those she stood with an armor all along, some not even knowing it was 'she', Frigg could not do nothing but walk backwards against the tips of those javelins.

For the first time, she felt the same as those enemies she fought. The same Gareth may have felt, as another child during the occupation of Guerinika by the Vastitas. The majority of them retreated, afraid of someone who carried on more fear than his, before their last expressions were engulfed by the horror of a face hew down. Frigg wasn't the one who killed whom she, ordered by Necro, pursued. Instead, her men, and women disguised as such like herself, had the bloody duty hanged on by the same power.

That power... When Frigg saw Gareth's statue on her back, she took out her scarf, and showed it for the ones once ordered by her commands, the ruler's invisible written commands. She had no pride or the same selfishness to show off such a traumatic experience, but wanted to see a reaction she was expecting to come out. They also shared the same experience, they were once children,

Frigg thought. Children born with the Vastitas, who had the same destiny, from the beginning of what they call by lives, until they achieved a 'Life' in the end... Children given such power grown by the hatred they felt under the supervision of the entirety of the eyes of the nation... Children who kill to live, because of the tale and each word told by their injured ears over years of creation of a 'self' not designated by them, but forced to be by the other...

What those Red Masks were meant to be before they became such Vastitas, if they weren't raised by them? As with everything, everyone sought an answer. An answer alone never came, as they died for what they believe to be it. Live was the answer, but how were they supposed to Live? Before they lived a life, they had to die, so they could be reborn as Vastitas. What Frigg had done... to allow strangers and their feelings to trespass into herself; feelings once forgotten to be shared by the remaining vessel left after years.

That wasn't betrayal, but a chance given once again to fulfill an opportunity of centuries, for a god, for a friend. Both things didn't matter for the Vastitas, but for Frigg, they had a matter since the day she saw Gizamaluke once again. To make the Vastitas learn about themselves and care for the 'self' they find on the other self.

No matter how hard the upcoming fight should have gone on, in a world of shadows, the greater is the near light. By releasing the Gungnir spear with the bare hands from the statue of the one who truly raised her , Frigg was prepared to fight against those who she once fought with, but to be followed by those who were on her side as well.

Given the circumstance, more followed into Frigg's side than rejected it. The few ones who were left on the other side fought against Frigg. Alone, she accepted the battle and its outcome. Five were defeated that morning. That spear... such power with the Gungnir, and within its owner. It wasn't something an ordinary could do, and understand. It was, and still is, a long and painful process to become a 'Vastita'.

Some kill by fun, some kill by revenge, and many kill because they want to Live. Frigg killed the nameless so they could find salvation for their sorrows. It was their decision, it was all they meant. From the pain they were raised, and by such pain they were declined into death. If things went easier as Frigg wished they could...

A wish... It was possible, but seemed impossible to reach. As Frigg and her people headed straight into Klaire, where a rebellion led by Siegfried started, more of the same wish faded as many wishes once had. Why did she and they kept fighting one against another? They were all the same, raised by the same fathers. They all fought for what they believed, it was what they learned to live with.

Each one has a belief, and each one is part of an 'one'. Though this kind of thought was meant to be kept, as seen with Kain and the Bulus, Frigg, as many who joined her, demanded a new belief. By breaking the boundaries with other people from another civilization, there was no truth left, or an 'absolute' belief. All that remained for the Vastitas was just a way to pursue a 'stable' condition, a 'better' way to establish the relationships once vanished from the memories of the ones who carried within the name 'Vastita'...

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— ...I wonder if this story will ever end, Sig. I'm... already... a bit... tired...

— Each beginning is meant to have an end, my Prince. Just wait a little longer, and see for yourself the conclusion...