A/N: Two things I want to mention in this update! The first is that I'm going to be updating this story every other Sunday for the time being. My life is a lot busier than it was back when I was writing Vivicendium and it's getting a bit stressful to upload one chapter a week atm. I will still be writing this story on a weekly basis but I think it will be less stressful to stretch out the updates slightly that way I can get a bit ahead.

Second thing: You'll notice that I'll be increasing the pace of this story a lot in the coming chapters. I jumped the story forward to Christmas in this chapter, so there's already a taste of that in this week's update. We aren't quite at the midpoint yet, but I'm hoping to make this story shorter than Vivicendium which means I need to hurry it up a bit. Also do keep in mind the Author's Note in the very first chapter when I mentioned that I'd be altering the timeline somewhat in this story. This will be more prevalent once Regulus's plot comes to the forefront, as the alterations mainly have to do with him, but I just wanted to issue a reminder.

Hope you all enjoy. Next update will be on August 14th!

Chapter Twenty Five | Amari aliquid

[Something bitter]

Time has a tendency of passing in a silent and unnoticeable manner. Before very long, the final vestiges of autumn comes to a crashing end as November paves the way into December. The landscape around the cottage becomes awash with the first snowfall of winter. The trees around the cottage have long lost their leaves, and the mornings grow chillier with each passing day. Vivian notices these changes with an almost passing transience. Now several months into her new role at the Ministry, she is quite busy these days, and so is Sirius.

Him and James will soon be wrapping up the Auror Training Program and becoming Junior Aurors. Between spending long days under Moody's tutelage, who had taken them under his wing upon their acceptance, and the various Order missions they are tasked with during the evenings, Vivian doesn't see him nearly as much as she's grown accustomed to. It's no matter, though. He doesn't have Order missions so often as to frequently take him away from the evening routine they have formed in recent months, and so the darker hours are usually spent together in one way or another.

Having grown tired of eating take-out, they've both begun to learn how to cook more basic meals that, according to Mrs. Potter, a 'child could make, honestly, you two'. They've taken to splitting up dinner responsibilities so as to make their schedules more allowing. So far, Vivian hasn't accidentally started anymore fires in the oven, so she's happy. Whether her food is good or not hardly matters. It's acceptable, she thinks. Anyway Sirius isn't a very good cook either, so shut up.

Her work at the Ministry is developing, though admittedly at a slower pace than she'd like. Mulciber still hasn't given her any good leads other than issue that additional invitation to the next gathering, which is to take place shortly after Christmas. She hasn't pressed him for information, not wanting to make her true intentions obvious and play into the suspicions he already has about said intentions, but it would be nice if he gave her something to work with. Dumbledore isn't overly concerned about the lack of information, at least. At the last Order meeting, he'd told her not to worry, and that in this instance, 'patience is imperative'.

Anyhow, with nothing to do at work besides, well, work, Vivian doesn't have much to discuss. Not that this stops her from inviting Mauve out for lunch, of course.

"I got the job at the Ministry," is the first thing out of Mauve's mouth when she joins Vivian at the table she'd secured some ten minutes prior. Her expression is set with a sort of exuberant glee as she sits down across from her. There's no hint of the bashfulness that Vivian remembers from Hogwarts. Seeing as they'd never been that close, she was expecting Mauve to be a bit more reserved, but apparently she's too excited to gush about how well her interview had gone.

"I was the most qualified, can you believe it? I'm still shocked that I was chosen. I mean, there were about a dozen other applicants – it's probably all thanks to you, Vivian. Having Dumbledore as a reference must've been what got me through," she eagerly says, her cheeks a rosy shade as she grins happily at her old schoolmate. Then, with a touch more confusion, she glances around the pub they're sitting in and adds, "By the way, I thought you hated muggles."

Vivian sighs at her. She casts a disparaging look at the strange creatures around her and sniffs, "I don't hate them."

Mauve raises an eyebrow at her. "You look a bit disgusted though."

"Look, McCallum, I'm trying to understand the ways of these people, okay? I'm not always successful," Vivian responds, sending Mauve a look.

Mauve shakes her head at her but merely responds, "A year ago, you wouldn't be caught dead in a place like this. To be honest, I thought you made a mistake when you suggested it."

That's a fair assumption, Vivian supposes. She can't entirely blame Mauve for thinking that.

"Well, I reckoned it'd be safer than going somewhere within the magical community…we're less likely to be recognized," Vivian admits with a shrug. Then she adds, "Besides, I like Muggle London, it's exciting, you know?"

Mauve doesn't know, but then again, she's never snuck out of her pureblood family's house for the purpose of having an exhilaratingly forbidden outing in the very place said family loathes.

"I guess," Mauve shrugs, not really looking as though she understands what's so exciting about London. She prefers the country, herself. It's much quieter, and seeing as she's taken plenty of trips into the city with her father over the years, the charm isn't half as strong as it once was.

"So when do you start your job?" Vivian asks as she glances around the pub and eyes the muggles in the vicinity of it. She'd chosen to forgo her usual cloak today on account of blending in a bit better, but she's still getting a few odd looks. She's not entirely sure why. Sirius had told her she looks perfectly ordinary and very muggle-like before she'd left the cottage. Perhaps it's the way she keeps shooting distrustful glances at the muggles around her, as if she's expecting them to do something unnatural.

Mauve shrugs, "In about a week. I'll be starting off in the department that handles public relations, but I'm hoping I'll be able to move into a different department soon. PR isn't really my thing."

No, Vivian honestly can't picture Mauve doing that sort of work. She sends her a nod and says, "Mm…might be good to get some experience in it, though."

After their food arrives, Mauve asks about the next Order meeting and Vivian tells her a bit of what to expect if she decides to come. She'd already spoken to Dumbledore about recruiting her and has received the go-ahead, so she doesn't skimp on the details. She wants to make sure Mauve knows exactly what she'd be getting into if she ends up agreeing to join. They part ways about an hour later with a tentative agreement formed between them: that Mauve would think about it and owl her with her decision. From there, should she agree to come, Vivian will update her on when the next meeting is once a time and place is decided upon.

All things considered, life seems to be taking a turn for the better these days. Vivian hasn't had another nightmare for a while, and though her mind still returns to those glowing eyes more often than she'd like, she hasn't allowed herself to stew in those thoughts too much. Part of the reason for this is the increased work load she had at her job. The other reason is a bit…well.

"Must you hang that shit all over the house?" Vivian idly wonders as she lounges on the couch and watches Sirius wave his wand over the furniture. Holly boughs immediately appear out of thin air, dangling over nearly every surface. It's a bit of an overkill if you ask her, but Sirius seems to be having fun with his little task and hardly bats an eye at her drawled complaint.

"It's our first Christmas together, Viv. Don't ruin my fun," he sniffs. Then, with a Marauder smirk tilting up the edge of his mouth, he turns towards her. The next moment, she's got a bough of holly appearing around her shoulders.

Spluttering around the sudden mouthful of holly leaves, whose edges are annoyingly sharp, Vivian shoves it off of her with a glower and huffs, "Seriously?"

He grins smugly even as she pushes the bough onto the floor. Vivian knows immediately what he means to say when he opens his mouth and sends him a warning look. It wouldn't normally stop him from dispensing with his usual joke (he does love it when people say the word 'serious' you know), but this time he only laughs, "Oh come on. Have a bit of Christmas spirit, Vivi. Besides, you were the one who asked me to decorate."

Vivian sighs, kicks the boughs further away from the couch, and grumbles, "I didn't mean for you to make the whole house look like it vomited holly leaves though."

It wouldn't exactly be an over-exaggeration that this is, indeed, the look the Sirius seems to have been going for. There's holly hanging off the back of the cough, above every doorway, all around the kitchen cabinets and on the backs of the kitchen chairs, and practically every other surface one could possibly imagine. She hates to think what their bedroom looks like. She'd rather not be attacked by holly leaves whilst trying to sleep.

Anyway, other than all this sudden and excessive greenery, the cottage doesn't look too different from normal. They've taken to using the fireplace more regularly of late to help stave off the chill of the coming winter and have gotten a few new pieces of furniture for the living room. Now, in addition to the couch, there's also two armchairs sitting by the fire. They had been ugly things when they first found them, their upholstery frayed and stained, but Sirius had bought them anyway despite Vivian's disdain. In hindsight, she's glad he did. A little bit of magic has fixed them up quite nicely. Now, they bear new fabric in a soft cream color and they fill out the room rather well…even if they are currently being drowned by two enormous boughs of holly, which Sirius had generously draped over the back of each.

"You're right," Vivian dryly says. "I should have known better than to ask you to decorate. I'll remember my mistake for the future."

She eyes the huge, overgrown holly that's hanging off the back of the couch with a judgmental look. She's going to have to vanish a few of these at some point. Sirius hadn't stopped the spell soon enough, so the leaves are larger than they ought to be and the holly berries are in a strange wrinkled state, appearing as though they might fall off their branches at any moment.

Sirius just shrugs and says, "I think I did a brilliant job. You're just being overly critical and you don't want to admit that you like my work."

She nods. As if she were speaking to a child, she says, "Yes, Sirius, you did a wonderful job."

He cottons onto her sarcasm, of course. It would be hard not to, especially since Sirius Black just so happens to be a master at translating Vivian Blair's sarcastic comments.

"Better be careful, Godric," he smirks over at her. "You're forgetting that I'm a prankster at heart."

She probably shouldn't brush this little warning aside (it is Sirius, after all) but she only shoots him a look and says, "How about instead of pranking me, we go to Diagon Alley and get some shopping done?" It'll be getting dark soon."

The enquiry derails him of whatever thoughts he has of potential pranks. He crosses his arms and muses, "I don't know…I still don't like the thought of us going there in public. If one of your old friends sees you, it'll look a bit suspicious."

Vivian isn't half as worried, though.

"They all think I'm trying to turn you, though," she shrugs. "It won't look that suspicious."

The subject of her attempting to turn him is a bit of a delicate one. Sirius hadn't exactly been overly pleased with that particular lie, but his displeasure had been born more so over the fact that he believes it's going to come back and bite them later on. After all, there's no way in hell it's ever going to happen, and he thinks it's a bit of a flimsy excuse that none of her old acquaintances would ever believe. Still, it hasn't seemed to cause any trouble since she had first issued it, and they've already gone back and forth about it to the point where there's not much else to say unless he wants to get into another argument with her, so he doesn't bring it back up for discussion and merely grunts.

They do need to get some Christmas shopping in, and Diagon Alley is the place to go. Besides, Sirius needs to withdraw some money from Gringotts anyhow. So, twenty minutes later, they're apparating to the Alley, bundled up in warm coats to stave off the cold.

"Come on," Sirius murmurs, hooking his arm around hers and making his way towards the steps leading to the wizarding bank. Vivian doesn't argue and just matches his pace. They've already agreed not to split up. They don't need to be taking any unnecessary risks.

It takes a lot longer than either of them expects to finish their first errand. The lines at Gringotts are long, and they end up standing in the queue for nearly thirty minutes before they're able to speak with one of the goblins. With Christmas around the corner, people seem to be of the same mine regarding withdrawing money to purchase gifts and such things, and it doesn't help that the atmosphere in the country is tenser than usual on account to the Death Eater attacks that always seem to make front page news. The attacks have been increasing of late. It seems that every time Sirius brings home the Daily Prophet, there's a new one. It's certainly had the Order in a tizzy, trying and failing to predict them. Voldemort is ever one step ahead.

After their errand at the bank, Sirius and Vivian head out towards the shops on the other end of the Alley, bantering back and forth about what to get James. Sirius is of the mind to buy him something nice (an expensive bottle of Ogden's had been his first suggestion). Vivian believes it's too much money to put down on Potter and thinks something cheaper would suffice (she doesn't want him thinking that she'd put any effort in, naturally).

They spend the next hour weaving through shops. It's busier than usual this evening on account of other people also doing their Christmas shopping, but the crowd is pleasant. A light dusting of snow from the night before still hangs upon the signs and rooftops, and every store is decked out in flickering lights and other magical decorations. Madame Florenza's Flower Shoppe has enchanted her window display to showcase red, green, and white flowers blooming on a magical loop, their petals shining with glittery dust. When they pass it, Sirius steps over to buy her a little yellow country rose, and delivers it to her with a grandiose sweep of his arm as if he's some ridiculous knight in an old fairy tale. She laughs at him for it and watches as it blooms, wilts, then blooms again as they continue down the street.

"Mmm…a box of chocolate for Wormtail," Sirius decidedly says when they pass the chocolate shop. Vivian follows him inside with a shake of her head. According to him, he gets Peter chocolates every Christmas without fail and isn't about to verge from this tried-and-true path.

They buy Remus a fancy new quill and some writing materials. While they're in Flourish and Blotts, Vivian picks up a set of parchment paper that's charmed to automatically catch grammatical errors for Gavin. It lets out a piercing screech whenever it catches one of those errors, and she can't wait to hear his reaction when he uses it and ends up getting shrilly shouted at by the charmed paper. If he ever does, that is. He's annoyingly precise, so maybe it will never happen.

(Sirius, of course, makes sure to complain over the fact that she's buying Tosspot Clarke a Christmas gift, but she only sends him an amused smile and ignores him.)

After going back and forth with their bickering over James's present, Vivian finally caves and lets Sirius get that bottle of Ogden's. While the salesman is wrapping it up for them with a few flicks of his wand, she makes sure to grumble a bit about it (to which Sirius sends her an amused smile and ignores said grumbling).

By the time their shopping is done about an hour later, the sky is getting dark and the street lights have started to flicker on. It's grown colder with the oncoming night and Vivian is shivering into Sirius's side as they idle on a street corner, making sure they've got everything. This is when shit hits the fan, so to speak.

It begins with a confusing bustle of action down the street, which they don't take much notice of at first. It's only when they hear the sound of a scream lifting up over the commotion that they both jerk their heads up and stare at the wave of people rushing their way.

Sirius jerks Vivian back, pressing them against the side of the building as they watch people stumble forward, tripping over cobblestones in their quest to get as far away from the black robed figures as they're able. The very moment they see said figures, they know that the situation is a lot more dire than they had initially thought.

"We need to get out of here," Sirius barks, reaching down to tangle his fingers with Vivian's as he pulls her off the street corner. They get knocked into the crowd of people almost immediately, herded down the street as they try to balance their shopping bags. Behind them, spells suddenly blast into existence. The sound of shattering glass soon follows.

"Sirius – " Vivian starts to say, then her hand is ripped out of his when someone shoulders past her, and she drops one of the bags she's trying to hold onto.

With no shortage of panic, Vivian pauses, bending down to grab it. She's very nearly knocked over in her attempt, barely managing to remain standing as she straightens up and allows herself to be herded forward once more. She lifts her eyes to search for Sirius's dark hair, and another burst of panic fills her when she doesn't see him.

"Sirius!" she calls over the clamor, hoping that he isn't too far, but it doesn't seem to do any good. She clutches the shopping bag tightly in her hand and reaches into her pocket for her wand, pulling it out as she casts a quick glance over her shoulder. The dark hooded figures seem to have stopped in front of a building halfway down the street. They're making quick work of the door, tearing it open with one furious blast of red as they sling a stunner into the wood. The force of it splinters the whole thing, leaving naught but a panel of it swinging on its hinges as they disappear inside.

She's still watching as if in a stupor as the last robed figure vanishes through the ruined doorway when a hand suddenly grabs her arm. The startled gasp that's ripped from her throat and the action is swallowed back when she turns and sees Sirius's worried face looming over her, his brows pinched together and his mouth set in a flat line.

"Bloody hell, Vivian, you nearly gave me a heart attack," he says, and throws a quick glance towards the building before dragging her away. His movements are rough, but given the circumstances, she can't entirely blame him for it.

"What are they doing here?" she asks, her voice shallow and faint. She looks over her shoulder once more, trying to catch sight of the building to see if there's a sign above its broken door, but Sirius is pulling her around the corner before she can find out.

His voice is tight with worry when he responds, "I don't know. Causing a panic, at the very least."

The quipped reply is lost in their own panic, though. Vivian doesn't issue a response and he doesn't say anything else as they hurry off, looking for a place to disapparate without getting caught in the magical crossfire of other witches and wizards doing the same.

When at last they're able to take their leave of the place, they do so without hesitation. The adrenaline is still pumping through them when they reappear on the outskirts of the wards surrounding the cottage, as close to it as they're able without interfering with said wards.

"I've got to send word to Moody," Sirius immediately says, shouldering his way into the cottage and dumping their shopping unceremoniously by the door. Vivian follows, placing her shopping bag down beside the others before quickly following him into the little room that they've reserved as a shared study of sorts.

"He likely already knows," she reasons, trying to calm herself down from the adrenaline still spiking through her. As such, she all but collapses into the chair near the window, rubbing her forehead as she watches Sirius grab a piece of parchment and jot down a quick message.

He distractedly replies, "Probably, but the Death Eaters blasted their way through the Alley, so it might take the Aurors a bit of time to figure out which building they entered what with all the destruction…"

He waves his wand over the parchment and it bursts into blue flames, burning away. Bluish smoke drifts up over the burnt paper and disappears. It will reappear where Moody is, the words Sirius had written forming in the smoke before dispersing. Dumbledore had suggested the spell some weeks prior for sending word regarding Order meetings, but seeing as others can read the smoky writing, they haven't used it much. It comes in handy for moments such as these, though.

Once the message is sent, Sirius leans over the desk with a sigh and groans, "Just once, I'd like to have an evening where I don't have to constantly worry about us getting attacked by those bastards."

Vivian wholeheartedly agrees. She hums in the back of her throat and, a few moments later, stands up with a sigh of her own. She steps over to where he's standing and he hauls her against him with a mumbled, "You have no idea how worried I was when we got separated."

She buries her face against his neck, breathing in his leather and musk scent as she hooks her arms around him.

"I suppose we picked a bad day to go out," she says, trying to keep her voice light and joking. It falls a bit flat. With a perplexed expression, she wonders, "Why do you think they were there? Just to stir up trouble?"

With a shrug, Sirius responds, "Looked like they had more of a specific goal in mind. Hopefully Moody and the other Aurors find out what their target was…or who."

She hums at that and leans back to take his face in her hands, leaning in to kiss him. Sirius doesn't complain and pulls her closer, needing the contact. He sinks against her with a sigh, deepening the kiss until the panicked adrenaline turns to a calmer, smoother burn.

"…I'm surprised you aren't jumping at the bit to join the Aurors. They're no doubt trying to round up the Death Eaters as we speak," Vivian hums against his lips, her fingers clenching into the coat that he has yet to remove.

Sirius, though, merely shifts his hand over her waist and murmurs back, "If Moody wants me there, I'll go…until then, though…"

He kisses her deeper, and whatever reply she had thought to say gets lost.

They learn soon after that the Death Eaters had been targeting a man by the name of Silas Sinclair, who just so happens to be an acquaintance of Mundungus Fletcher. The news arrives the very next evening, when Dumbledore calls an Order meeting in wake of the attack in Diagon Alley. Vivian barely manages to send word to Mauve beforehand. She's not sure if her schedule will allow her to come, but she had owled Vivian days before with the news that she'd like to attend the next meeting, so Vivian is hopeful that she'll see her there.

Her and Sirius arrive a bit early. Dumbledore's called the meeting at the same muggle pub that they've been to prior. He doesn't usually like to meet at the same place twice, but considering the suddenness of it all, there wasn't enough time to decide on a different location. In any case, none of the muggles seem to recognize them as they make their way to the back room, and Vivian surmises that they've had their memories tempered with so as to avoid any potential issues in the future should the Death Eaters trace them here.

When they step into the room, Vivian is surprised to see that, despite them being early, there's already a number of other members there. James greets them when they step inside, but Vivian only has time to issue a short 'hello' before she catches sight of Mauve lingering on the other side of the room and goes off to speak to her.

"You made it after all," she says. "It was short notice, so I wasn't sure if you'd be here."

Mauve sends her a shrug and replies, "I didn't have anything better to do tonight. This is about the attack yesterday, right?"

Vivian nods, sitting down in the chair beside her and murmuring, "Yeah. Hopefully Moody has some answers as to who the Death Eaters were going after…"

Remus and Peter don't show up. The former is absent, trying to track down another pack on his list. As for Peter, James isn't sure where he's gone off to. Apparently, he'd said he'd be here, but as the other members trickle into the room, there's no sign of him. When Dumbledore arrives, he wastes little time enquiring into whether others will come and merely strides to the front of the room to begin the meeting.

"Mr. Sinclair was an associate of Mundungus and a collector of rare magical artifacts," are the first words to leave Dumbledore's mouth as he steps forward. "He hasn't joined the Order in an official capacity, but he has been of an immense help what with his connections."

He says that last word with an almost wry twist. Across the table, Mundungus lets out a little grunt and, seeing the slightly confused expressions around him, shrugs, "Black market."

He needn't say more. The confusion clears, dropping away entirely when Dumbledore bleakly says, "He's dead."

Kingsley frowns. "Why would the Death Eaters want him? I'm sure they have their own connections in that world."

Vivian studies Dumbledore's face, but the man only peers over at Moody, who gruffly responds, "We aren't sure. We were hoping that Blair over here might be able to ask some questions at the next gathering. Find out what they were looking for and what role Sinclair played in it."

The attention of the room swings abruptly to Vivian, who straightens up and murmurs, "I'll…ask around, then."

One glance at Sirius tells her that he's not sure about this whole thing, but he doesn't attempt to go against Moody's proposition and merely stays silent.

"Be careful about it," Moody tells her with a nod. "Sinclair might not have been an official member of the Order, but he had ties to us."

Mundungus grumbles, "Somethin' ain't right if you ask me." Gideon glances over at Mundungus, then at Dumbledore to hesitantly ask, "Do you think they know who our members are, Albus? It does seem odd…almost too coincidental."

Dumbledore, though, just shakes his head and calmly replies, "We aren't yet sure why they targeted Sinclair. I think it premature to make assumptions that they were aware of his allegiance to our cause."

Moody grumbles beneath his breath, looking a bit like he disagrees. He eyes everyone gathered around the table as he ambles over to an empty chair and sits down with a grunt, saying darkly, "We'll find out what their game is soon enough. The bastards can't hide in the shadows forever. Blair, you're attending their little Christmas party, aren't you? Owl me if you hear anything, and make sure to use that coded spell I taught you."

She gives him a short nod but doesn't say anything, preferring to sit back and watch the proceedings without becoming too involved. Sirius, on the other hand…

"Aren't we going to discuss the attacks that have been sweeping the countryside the last month?" he demands, shoulders tense as he sits up in his chair. "There's been six deaths and even more injured. There's got to be a pattern here, Moody."

Moody doesn't appear to mind Sirius's passion and leans forward to respond, "Oh, there is. They've been targeting muggleborns, mainly. Since you brought it up, Black, I want you and Potter to do a sweep of the last location. It was near a forested area and I've got half a mind that they might've dragged one of the bodies there."

Vivian purses her mouth at the thought of such a macabre act. The last attack had resulted in one death and one missing person. The Auror department have spent the last two days searching the area as well as contacting the missing person's relatives and such, but Moody seems to think that the missing man won't be found any time soon. At least not alive.

"Bring Gideon and Fabian with you," Moody adds, "and report back to me at the Ministry once you're finished."

Sirius looks pleased to have a mission, even if it's only mucking around the woods with James in tow, searching for signs of the missing man. He's been busy with the Auror Training program these days and hasn't been given a mission in a while. Vivian just hopes they find the woman, and hopefully alive at that. All this talk about missing people makes her wary. Her mind jumps back to the man that Adrian had brought to the gala. It seems as though the cases for missing people have skyrocketed of late, and she can't help but wonder if it has anything to do with that Inferi army the Dark Lord seems intent on creating.

When she poses the question to Moody, he grunts, "Possibly. The latest cases have been people with a stronger public standing, though. Seems odd that he'd target them instead of people who are less noticeable."

"But you said this missing woman was a muggleborn, which means she has magic. It could be that he's targeting a specific group, one that has magical abilities already inherent within them while being lower on the totem pole, according to him at least," Fabian offers, sending Vivian a musing glance.

Vivian nods, "It does seem to be more successful…creating an Inferi from a witch or wizard instead of a muggle. They're more powerful."

"What I want to know is why he's so obsessed with Inferi to begin with," James inputs from his seat beside Sirius. "I mean, what's his aim? Is he just trying to build up his army?"

None of them can provide an answer to that. The throw a few ideas around, but the topic of conversation eventually comes back to the recent attacks, and they leave the questions around the Inferi to rest for now.

"He's been targeting only muggles until now," Kingsley murmurs with a frown. "It seems as though he's changing his strategy. But why?"

No one knows that, either. They Order is lacking in both numbers as well as information, and it seems that all they can do is attempt to provide damage control following the raids and attacks. It's frustrating not being able to prevent said attacks. Even more frustrating not knowing what Voldemort is planning, and how they can counteract those plans. Or, Vivian quietly thinks, if it's even possible to.

So much has changed from the world of her youth, when everything seemed peaceful and so perfectly normal. She wishes that she could return to that time, but she knows she can't. Still, the longing courses through her, and she can't help but wonder what the future will bring, or how it will alter her, or if she'll even live to see it. Everything is so unpredictable. It's uncomfortable, not knowing what to expect.

She glances over at Sirius and sighs. She wishes things were easier. That they didn't have to put up so many wards around the cottage or take care whenever they go out. That they could have a pleasant evening in Diagon Alley without worrying about dark hooded figures encroaching upon them. That she could simply exist with him in her own world and be done with it, all of it, everything that seems frightening and everything that splinters its way between them. She would remove those splinters one by one if she could, but she knows she can't do that either. Even if she were to turn her back on her own ambitions, Sirius would never abandon the Order or his friends. With the Dark Lord and his followers causing such chaos, such a thing isn't possible, and that's the very reason why they need to do this. Why they need to fight.

"So we've got a new member amongst us, I see. McCallum, right?" Gideon asks as the conversation begins to die down.

Beside Vivian, Mauve shifts in her chair and hesitantly nods, "Yeah. I'm not sure how much use I'll be, though."

"Ministry employee?" Moody questions. When Mauve nods again, he grunts, "We'll find a use for you."

Vivian sends Mauve a calm look in hopes of helping with her nerves. Mauve smiles faintly back.