"Brumous"

"Chapter Forty-Four: The Bloody Nose"

Harry woke up, feeling disoriented. He blinked at his surroundings, recognizing it as the bedroom Andromeda had decorated for him in the Hogsmeade house. Harry had never slept in the room before, but he had seen it with its Magpies memorabilia, the Gryffindor comforter, and the pictures from when he was a baby and some of him as a teenager. The toddler broom he had taken from Godric's Hollow now hung on the wall. It felt odd to leave something so valuable behind while he was at school, but he hadn't wanted it to become broken in his trunk. And he had a home now. A place where he could keep things and know they were taken care of.

Things. He had pictures and memories and random trinkets that he didn't have to haul to school like he used to. Because, surely, the Dursleys would have destroyed anything he left behind. He had been meticulous about packing his trunk in the past. Checking and rechecking it multiple times a day leading up to when he was allowed to leave. The thought of leaving anything valuable behind had been his greatest fear a couple of years ago. To lose one of the few precious pictures of his parents had been completely unthinkable.

That was no longer a worry. In fact, there had been a few times Sirius had sent an owl with a book he forgotten or had handed him a hooded sweatshirt he left behind when they would see each other. Sirius always made sure he was well-stocked on essentials too, making sure he had a cleaning potion for his glasses, soaps and shampoos, new razors because he knew Harry hated using his wand to shave, and just random things like that. Andromeda always made sure she sent him homemade baked goods and sweets. Ted made sure that Harry always had pain potions for his headaches and bruise balm and the like.

Pushing himself up into a seated position, he felt an odd expansion in his chest. He squinted his end table for his glasses. He saw them sitting next to a picture that he didn't have to see to know what it was of. He had stared at it enough to have memorized it by now: his tiny baby self in his father's arms with his mother beaming next to him. Sirius and Marlene on his father's side with his grandparents on his mother's side. A family picture. All seven of them. Those photos were rare since his grandparents had died when he was only a few months old.

Harry righted his glasses on his face before he looked at the clock to see it was nearly ten in the evening, knowing he had slept the entire day away. The fogginess from the potions still clung to his mind. He eased out of the bed, stumbling as he stood. He hated Sleeping Potions, especially ones that had a Dreamless Sleep Potion mixed in. He always felt extra groggy anytime he woke up. Given that his mind was numb and no negative thoughts plagued him, Harry suspected there was also a bit of Calming Draught that had been added. He wondered if it was something Sirius had taken before, this potion stronger than anything he had surely ever taken. Harry shook his head, trying to clear the cobwebs.

After a quick stop at the loo, Harry made his way downstairs. He found Sirius easily enough, sitting by the fireplace reading a book. Harry tilted his head to the side, trying to read the title but couldn't. Entering the parlor, Sirius looked up at him briefly before he bent the corner of his page down in his book and tossed it onto the coffee table. Harry caught sight of the title. A Serpent's Gifts: The Complete Guide to Utilizing Serpents in Healing by Ominis Gaunt.

Harry gestured his head towards the book, his arms crossing over his chest. "You thinking of becoming a Healer or do you just want to read about a long lost relative?"

Sirius snorted. "Neither. I'd have a terrible bedside manner. Besides, I don't know nor do I care how that Ominis bloke is related to me."

Harry bent down, picking up the book to flip through it. "Probably your uncle-grandfather or something equally disturbing."

Sirius laughed, the lines around his eyes becoming more prominent. "I just can't escape the pureblood inbreeding it seems."

Harry didn't say anything as he flipped through the pages. Every single potion seemed to have some sort of snake ingredient as a component to it. Harry had a terrible feeling about the book.

"Don't tell me you're going to sacrifice Fluffernoodle for a potion," Harry said, looking up.

Sirius rolled his eyes as he rose from the chair. "Nah, I said he could stay. I won't murder him for a potion," he said as he waved his hand in a dismissive motion. "You hungry?"

"I could eat," Harry admitted, tossing the book back onto the coffee table.

Sirius nodded, tugging his wand from his pocket. He shot Harry an apologetic smile.

"Dumbledore stopped by and showed me how to check your mind," Sirius explained. "Can I just check to make sure we're alone?"

Harry stiffened. "Err, yeah."

Harry hated the thought that he had slipped into Voldemort's mind due to his exhaustion. He also knew he had to give something up. He couldn't keep up with his current schedule and keep his mind on lockdown. His eyes slide closed as Sirius pressed the tip of his wand to Harry's temple. The process lasted longer than when Dumbledore performed the spell. A soft throbbing started across his forehead, an annoying headache settling in. When it ended, Harry let out a sigh of relief.

"You all right, kid?" Sirius asked, his hand wrapping around Harry's shoulder.

Harry nodded, his eyes still screwed shut. "Yeah, is he… you know?" he asked, snapping his eyes open to look up at his godfather.

"I didn't detect anything," Sirius concluded. "I was thinking that maybe we should do that on a more regular basis."

Harry's brows furrowed. "Are you concerned that I'm not keeping up with my Occlumency? I've just been tired. I slipped. I'm sorry."

Sirius shook his head. "It's not that. It's just a precaution, all right? I think… I think we've been too comfortable lately. I've told you that before. I also think we need to start talking in code when we talk about the Horcruxes. Just in case something happens and Voldemort slips through."

Harry searched Sirius' face. "Do you… do you think he has?"

Sirius' face didn't change from its normal stoic expression. "It's just a precaution, Harry. Let's just call them…" he trailed off, waving his hand. "My Uncle Alphard's long lost solar system gemstones, yeah?"

Harry rolled his neck, trying to ease his tense muscles. "Sure, long lost Black family gemstones."

"Uncle Alphard's solar system gemstones," Sirius corrected. "Voldemort can confirm they exist with Narcissa. My uncle loved them. He was fairly certain that Regulus lost Jupiter in Agde one summer. If he did, he never told me or confessed. But it sounds like Regulus, so I'm sure he did."

"Why would he take them on holiday?" Harry inquired, shoving his hands into the pocket of his hooded sweatshirt.

Sirius bobbed his head from side to side, his face wincing. "Uncle Alphard didn't take much stock in Divination, but he was very big into Astrology. He said it helped him anticipate who to trust, who not to trust, how to determine someone's true self. He once told me I was the very embodiment of a Scorpio and I needed to not let the scorpion take over when I was highly emotional."

Harry chewed on his bottom lip, knowing Sirius didn't take his uncle's advice to heart. Sirius was downright dangerous and reckless when he was in an emotional state. Not to mention violent. Harry was glad that Sirius was on his side.

"Anyway, the gemstones were Divination tools he used," Sirius continued. "I never understood how to use them. I never really took much stock in Divination at all. I took it at school as a complete doss subject, just a class where James and I could fuck around. Plus, it annoyed Walburga and Orion which only sweetened it all for me. But, uh, unfortunately, I did learn a thing or two in that class. I learned how to scry maps and that's how I found Peter so quickly all those years ago. So, I guess, Divination fucked me over a bit."

Harry nodded, suddenly hating Divination more than he had before. "Ron and I would create outrageous ways each other would die for our homework. The darker we were, the better grade we received."

Sirius chuckled. "Sounds about right. Come on, kid, let's get you something to eat," he said, placing his hands on Harry's shoulders and steering him towards the kitchen.

Harry collapsed in a chair, his elbows propping up onto the table. He dragged both hands through his thick hair, trying his hardest to wake up a bit more. Honestly, all he wanted to do was to go back to bed. If he was being even more honest, he wanted to go to bed with Ginny curled up next to him.

A soft clank sounded. Harry looked up to see Sirius had sat down a plate of… well, Harry didn't actually know what it was. Some sort of chicken dish. It smelled good and had obviously had a lot of spices added to it, so Harry knew that his godfather hadn't made it.

"Did you get takeaway?" Harry asked, grabbing his fork.

Sirius sat down with his own plate. "No."

Harry looked dubiously at his godfather. "You didn't make this. This isn't something Mrs Weasley makes either."

"I chopped the onion," Sirius offered. "Bloody well cried my way through it, but I did it."

"Who did the rest?" Harry pressed.

"Tegan," Sirius replied.

"You cook together now?" Harry questioned, his eyebrows raising.

"I guess," Sirius replied with a shrug.

Harry squinted at his godfather. "Now, I'm eating her leftovers."

"Well, they're my leftovers," Sirius argued. "I chopped the onion. My tears are a part of the meal."

Harry's longest relationship had been with Ginny. They were going on six months. So, he didn't know a ton about relationship, but he assumed he did all right piecing together enough information since Ginny hadn't broken up with him yet. Harry was fairly certain cooking meals together was definitely a girlfriend/boyfriend thing and not just a spot of fun thing.

"Do you want to… you know, practice some Occlumency?" Sirius asked, his voice slightly hesitant.

Harry stilled. His gaze snapped up to look at his godfather. He knew he messed up. He knew he let his walls slip. But he wasn't a moron. As soon as the effects of the potion were finished, he'd concentrate on his walls once more.

"Err," Harry replied, pushing his chicken around on his plate.

His appetite had evaporated.

"Do you not want to?" Sirius asked.

Harry looked up at his godfather. "Look, I was just tired. I don't know how many times I have to say it."

Harry's anger was slowly but surely getting the best of him. Sirius didn't seem bothered by it. He only leaned back in his chair. His food forgotten. He crossed his arms over his chest as he peered at Harry. Fluffernoodle poked his little head out from the collar of Sirius' jumper.

"You're tired a lot lately," Sirius observed. "Today wasn't a one-off thing. I've noticed for weeks you have been slowing down drastically."

Harry dropped his fork on his plate, pushing his food away from him. "I'm just busy."

"Harry, how's school going?" Sirius asked.

Harry shrugged his right shoulder. "Can't be worse than last year."

Sirius snorted. "I don't think anything could be worse than last year."

Harry only felt bitter. "Oh, I don't know, I mean the year Voldemort lived in Quirrell's head was pretty bad. Or perhaps the year when the Chamber of Secrets was opened and there was a Basilisk petrifying all the Muggleborns was worse. That year, Ginny almost died, so that was pretty bad. Then there was the year that a supposed mass murderer was trying to kill me. Or, you know, the year I was entered into a deadly tournament against my will."

Sirius shook his head, a chuckle escaping his lips. Harry's jaw tightened at the response.

"I don't know. I think mass murderer year was my favorite," Sirius said in a light tone.

Harry felt his irritation slip at his godfather's teasing tone. He propped his elbow up onto the table, his palm pressing against his chin and his fingers resting along his jaw.

"Yeah, that was a pretty good year. Probably my favorite so far," Harry admitted, which was the truth. He had gained his first ever family member that year.

"I heard that mass murderer is deranged," Sirius said, his tone still light and airy. "You should probably stay away from him."

"I heard he was muttering 'He's at Hogwarts' all hours of the day," Harry replied, his lips twitching. "Obsessive much?"

Sirius let out a bark-like laugh, his head throwing back. Harry smirked.

"I know you have a lot going on, Harry," Sirius said in a somber voice. "If you need a week off from Robards' lessons or a week off from the dueling clubs at school, then you can take a week off."

"Those are important though," Harry argued.

Sirius nodded. "Honestly, if it was me, I'd drop the dueling clubs. I'd also stop tailing junior Death Eaters. Focus on your dueling lessons with the Aurors, your school work, and have fun with Quidditch. You're only a kid once. You'll never get this time back."

Harry wanted to say he had never been able to be just a kid, but he kept his mouth shut. He didn't want Sirius to become all mopey and guilt-ridden. His eyes only searched his godfather's exhausted face.

"When you're an adult, you have so many responsibilities and shit you have to deal with on a daily basis," Sirius continued. "Some of it is great. Spending time with you is by far the highlight of my week, but most of the time I'm just exasperated and wishing I could have my youth back so I can just… breathe. When I was twenty, I felt more alive and useful, you know? I was far more optimistic even if I was anxious for you and your parents. I don't know, I had this feeling like you'd be all right. That James and Lily would be all right. That everything would work out. That I could fix it. And I couldn't. I failed."

"I know I've said this before, but I don't blame you for anything that happened," Harry insisted, his hand dropping from his face. "I know I don't really know my parents, but I don't think they'd blame you either."

Sirius nodded, his lips tugging down. "Nah, they wouldn't. But it doesn't matter. I blame myself. Having lived through that, I know that fixing things is hard. I know failing is easy. One day, you're going to be a father and probably a godfather. You'll have the weight of the world on your shoulders knowing there are these little tiny humans that depend on you to keep them safe and to make sure they're happy. It's all you'll think about, just fretting that you're not giving them enough. Every time they bloody stub a toe, you'll wonder what you could have done differently to prevent them experiencing any pain for even a moment."

Harry clasped his hands together on the table.

"It's the plight of a parent, I suppose," Sirius continued, his head falling against the back of his chair. "I know James and Lily were prepared to die for you the moment you took your first breath, before they even heard the prophecy. I knew as your godfather, when James plopped you in my arms, that I would be standing right beside them to protect you. It seems scarier now than it did before. It's just me now."

"There's Marlene," Harry reasoned. "I think she made herself perfectly clear earlier."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "I'm sorry you had to see that."

Harry shrugged. "I don't know. I'm glad I did. I never really knew where she stood before or why she distanced herself as much as she did."

"I should have insisted you saw her more, even before she regained her memories," Sirius leveled. "I'm sorry. I was… selfish, I suppose. I've spent so much time running from my past and trying to distance myself from it that I was unknowingly pushing you away from her as well. I've been pushing everyone from my past away except for you. Even with Remus, I've been picking fights with him and pushing him away. But he stubbornly keeps coming back."

Harry frowned. "Why are you pushing people away?"

Sirius let out a low, long sigh. His fingers splayed on the wood, his eyes narrowing down at his hands. Harry sat up a bit straightener, his arms crossing on the table as he leaned forward.

"Apparently, it's what I do," Sirius admitted, his gaze flickering up to look at Harry. "You can't be sad or upset if you're not around the people who bring up bad memories, yeah?"

"Like Marlene?" Harry whispered.

Sirius shot Harry a rueful smile. "Especially Marlene. I don't know if I ever told you this before, but I was supposed to be at the McKinnons that night to celebrate Marlene's dad's birthday. But, uh, your parents asked me to mind you for the evening. They wanted to celebrate their anniversary just the two of them, so they had dinner on the back deck. Marlene told me to go. She said her family threw too many events and I always attended them. I was supposed to go with her dad to a Gobstone competition the next day in Glasgow anyway for his birthday. I remember telling Marlene that if you weren't in hiding, I would have brought you along with us for the evening and she joked that her parents would love me even more to see me be a doting godfather. Marlene's family knew how much we loved being your godparents. We talked about you all the time, gushing over you. They so desperately wanted to meet you, but your parents kept your social circle small on purpose."

Harry's heart twisted in his chest. "Even if you went, things could have turned out the same. Or worse even."

Sirius nodded, a tight smile crossing his face. "Yeah, maybe. Or maybe I could have helped. I don't know, Harry. It's certainly one of the topics I try not to think about."

"But Marlene doesn't blame you for any of it," Harry insisted.

"Again, doesn't matter, Harry," Sirius replied, his lips pursing to the side. "How would you feel knowing the entire Weasley family was slaughtered and you were supposed to be there but weren't? Wouldn't you think you could have changed things? One more fighter, one more body to watch their backs. Think of the possibilities."

Harry didn't want to think about that. He couldn't fathom losing Ron and Ginny, as well as the entire Weasley family. In his short sixteen years of life, he had lost more people than he wanted to think about. It was as though a stake rammed through his heart whenever he thought about what his childhood could have been: grandparents, parents, godparents, family friends. Harry knew loss. The thought of losing anyone that he could remember seemed completely unbearable. All of the loss before had been people he couldn't remember, who he didn't have any concrete memories of because he had been so young. The thought of losing anyone he cared about now literally paralyzed him with fear.

But at the end of the day, Sirius hadn't ignored Harry like he was ignoring Marlene. Sirius could have easily tossed Harry aside to numb the loss of James and Lily Potter, to ease the suffering of Azkaban, to start fresh without anyone holding him back. Isn't that what Remus had been doing? Holding Harry at arms length because Remus couldn't stand to be around him for too long? Harry swallowed at the lump in his throat, pushing aside the thought of not having Sirius by his side. Honestly, he probably would have died already if it wasn't for his godfather. One thought of the scar on his neck told him as much.

Harry only nodded in understanding before he dragged his plate back towards him. Honestly, it didn't really matter. Sirius hadn't pushed him away in the same way he was pushing Marlene away. Harry felt selfish for being grateful that he wasn't in Marlene's position.

Sirius flipped through the chapter of Moribund that talked about how to destroy Horcruxes: Fiendfyre and Basilisk venom. Scratching his nail against his bottom lip, Sirius decided he needed to brush up on his Fiendfyre skills. Honestly, he had never cast the spell. It was volatile with even the most skilled wizard. While James and Sirius had done plenty of stupid shit, they weren't stupid enough to use Fiendfyre.

Basilisk venom they could work with. With Harry's help, they could open the Chamber of Secrets and hopefully extract some venom from the dead serpent. They would just need to make sure they obtained as much as they possibly could, because Sirius liked the idea of venom more than Fiendfyre.

A knock sounded. Sirius stuffed the book into a drawer in his coffee table before locking it. Marlene and Andromeda were supposed to visit so Sirius could lay out all the information he knew about the Horcruxes and Harry's little problem.

He realized he needed to fill Marlene in on everything happening with Harry. She was his godmother. She had her memories back. There was no reason to keep her in the dark, especially if she wanted to play an important role in his life. Sirius couldn't deny Harry that relationship or that connection, no matter how painful it was for him. He also realized that he needed Andromeda's help if he was even going to attempt to brew a potion to help rid Harry of his Horcrux problem. He sure as hell wouldn't be able to do it alone.

Making his way to the entryway, he hoped Andromeda was the first to arrive. It would be just plain awkward if it was Marlene. Opening the front door, Sirius swore mentally. Marlene smiled at him, her nose and the tips of her ears tinged red from the cold. Sucking in a breath, Sirius stepped aside and gestured for her to enter.

Marlene didn't hesitate. She shrugged off her peacoat and hung it on the coat rack without saying anything before she unraveled the scarf around her neck and hung that up as well. Marlene glanced around the house. Of course, her eyes lingered on the wall of pictures. She walked towards it, her arms crossing over her chest.

"These are from when you went to France?" Marlene asked.

Sirius shoved his hands into his trouser pockets, his face pinching. "Yeah. We stayed at the Black holiday home. I think Harry had a good time."

Marlene's hand reached out, grabbing a framed picture sitting on the table below the wall collage. It was another one of Sirius and Harry in France (which seemed to be all the current pictures he had of the two of them) standing in front of the sea. They were only in their swim trunks, their arms wrapped around each other. Harry beamed in the photo, looking more like James than he had ever in his life. It was one of the few photos Sirius had of Harry as a teenager looking relaxed and carefree, younger than his age.

"He looks like James here," Marlene whispered. "Funny how something as small as a smile can change his entire face."

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, it is."

Marlene sat the photo down, making sure it was centered between the other pictures. Her hand brushed underneath her eyes before she turned to face Sirius. A fake smile crossed her lips as she tucked her hair behind her ear. Sirius noticed for the first time since she had regained her memories that she had re-pierced her ears, the little earrings running from her lobe up to her cartilage. Five in total. Just like there had been before. It was something Bella Riddle didn't wear. But Marlene McKinnon loved her piercings and tattoos.

"Thank you," Marlene said in a sincere voice. "For inviting me here to tell me things concerning Harry. I know, well…" she trailed off, a huff of air escaping her lips. "I suppose you don't have to because you gained custody. I would never fight you for custody, not when the two of you have developed such an amazing bond. But I'm grateful that you're finally letting me in."

"I didn't mean to not include you," Sirius admitted, attempting to push down the guilt building in his chest. "I guess… well, I stupidly assumed you'd form your own relationship with Harry when you were both ready. I didn't think about the shit storm surrounding Harry and how you would probably want to be involved in it. When I say shit storm, I really mean shit storm, Marly. It's a lot."

Marlene wrapped her arms around her stomach. "The prophecy."

Sirius' lips pulled. "I mean, yeah, that's a component. But there's something worse that's happened."

Marlene's brows furrowed. "What?"

"We need to wait for Andy," Sirius replied. "I just found this out not long ago, and I think I need Andy's help to accomplish what I need to accomplish. She's the only potioneer that I trust at this point."

"What we need to accomplish," Marlene insisted.

Sirius shook his head. "Nope, this a purely me thing. Not because I'm pushing you away or anything. It's because of my super special Gaunt blood."

Marlene arched an eyebrow. "Gaunt blood?"

Sirius jutted his lower jaw out. "Voldemort's mother was a Gaunt."

A knock sounded at the door. About fucking time. Sirius briefly raised his eyebrows up at Marlene before he turned to open the door. Andromeda bustled in, pulling her gloves off her hands and letting out a string of apologies about how an intern exploded a cauldron at work. She froze midsentence when she saw Marlene standing there. Her gray eyes flickered between Sirius and Marlene, her face trying to remain neutral but Sirius saw the corners of her lips twitch.

"Marlene!" Andromeda greeted as she crossed the room to give the younger woman a hug. "What a pleasant surprise. I thought my cousin was going to be stubborn when it came to you for the rest of his life. You know how he is."

Marlene smiled at Sirius over Andromeda's shoulder. "I think he felt bad after our disagreement."

Sirius sucked in a breath and held it.

Andromeda pulled back, her hands pressing on Marlene's arms. "I'm sure, but Harry seemed very uncomfortable. You know, Ted and I used to fight upstairs in our room so Dora wouldn't hear."

"You're not here to give us parenting advice, Andy," Sirius snapped.

Andromeda turned around, her eyes searching Sirius' face. "I care about Harry as much as the two of you do. Take it or leave it. I'm just making a friendly suggestion."

"You're meddling," Sirius retorted.

"I seem to recall you hated when Walburga and Orion shouted at each other," Andromeda said, her eyebrow arching. "I remember quite a few times when we were in France, I'd find you sitting at the top of the stairs listening to them fight. You'd flinch when Walburga would throw things. You wouldn't leave until Uncle Alphard forced you to."

Sirius remembered the fighting. Their screaming matches were unlike anything he had ever heard before. By the time he was twelve, he had stopped caring. He remembered the last time he had listened to one of their spats. It had been all about Sirius, his sorting, and his budding friendship with an unsavory blood traitor. Each blamed the other for not being able to control Sirius. Sirius couldn't find it within him to stomach listening anymore. He'd lock himself in his room and try to drown out the noise with the wireless.

"It was a small disagreement," Sirius replied. "It was nothing as abhorrent as Walburga's screeching."

"I understand that, but even the smallest fights between caregivers for an abused child can be triggering," Andromeda reasoned. "I'm not chastising you, Sirius. I'm just suggesting that next time you two get into a heated argument, it would be best to leave it for when Harry's not around."

Sirius didn't really want to talk about his parenting skills, or lack thereof. He was trying his damn best with what little experience he had raising a teenager. Harry wasn't even a normal teenager. He was a severely neglected and abused kid who was marked for death. That made creating healthy boundaries with Harry difficult. It made him more clingy, desperate for knowledge about everything that was going on, made him crave affection to feel loved, and he needed frequent reassurances. Sirius could deal with the clinginess and the constant need for affection and reassurance. It was Harry's insistence that he needed to know everything that was Sirius' greatest hurdle. Keeping anything from the kid was seen as a slight, made him feel undervalued and unloved. Sirius didn't know how to balance that out.

"Can we talk about why I asked you both here today?" Sirius asked, gesturing towards the parlor.

Andromeda nodded. She stepped forward, running her hand down Sirius' arm before she made her way into the parlor. Marlene stared at Sirius for a few moments before she followed Andromeda. Sirius screwed his eyes shut for a brief moment, counting to ten in his head before he joined them. Marlene and Andromeda sat side by side on the sofa. Sirius remained standing, positioning himself in front of them on the other side of the coffee table.

"All right, I'm just going to say what I need to say," Sirius started, his eyes flickering between them. "What is said here today never leaves this room. I mean it. Not even Ted, Andy. It's not that I don't trust him, because I do. With my fucking life. But this is a situation where the less people who know, the better. This information is dangerous and could cost Harry his life."

Andromeda stiffened, her eyes widening as she stared at Sirius. Marlene leaned back in on the sofa, her arms crossing over her chest.

"Only Dumbledore and I know this information," Sirius continued. "Harry doesn't know and I will never tell him. If I find out either one of you told him or anyone else, I'll kill you. I don't care who you are, I will murder anyone who so much as let's this slip to anyone. I'm deadly seriously right now. This information does not leave this room or I will lose my fucking mind."

"Sirius, you're scaring me," Andromeda whispered.

"I don't care," Sirius admitted. "If you can't handle this, then leave now."

Andromeda and Marlene shared a look. Sirius crossed his arms over his chest, inhaling deeply and holding his breath. His eyes flickered around the room to see if anyone was going to stop him from revealing the information. He told James to only come to him if he was on the wrong track. This was a big fucking deal. There was no going back from this moment.

"Tell us, Sirius," Marlene urged.

Sirius snapped his gaze to Marlene. "Voldemort is immortal because he made Horcruxes."

Marlene's brows furrowed while Andromeda gasped. Andromeda's hands pressed against her mouth.

"What's a Horcrux?" Marlene asked.

Andromeda's hands fell from her mouth, her eyes sliding closed. "It's an object that contains a bit of a person's soul. It enables them to live forever unless the Horcrux is destroyed."

Sirius nodded, clearing his throat. "There's an entire ritual that involves murder and a blood ritual and… it's ghastly. If done wrong, it can kill you."

Marlene didn't say anything.

"What does Voldemort having a Horcrux have anything to do with Harry?" Andromeda pressed.

Sirius swallowed. "Horcruxes."

Andromeda's eyes narrowed. "How many?"

"There's six Horcruxes so his soul is split into seven, the most powerful number in magic," Sirius explained.

"How is that even possible?" Andromeda gasped.

Sirius' face tugged down, not really wanting to talk about his fucking biological family but he knew he needed to. "He's a Gaunt. It's in his family magic. Snakes can slip through the cracks in the earth to the underworld. Dumbledore believes this gift is what allowed Voldemort to split his soul so many times."

"Is that why he looks so ghastly?" Andromeda wondered.

Sirius nodded. "A sacrifice of one's self is demanded upon making a Horcrux."

"I don't understand…" Marlene trialed off, her head shaking. "What does Harry have to do with this?"

Sirius' heart sped up. "A soul split into seven is unstable. The kind of magic that happened the night James and Lily died…" he trailed off, the words clogging in his throat.

A hand touched his shoulder. Light and airy. Sirius turned his head slowly to the right, afraid of who he would see. He only caught a whiff of a nearly forgotten floral scent tinged with dewy grass. Except he didn't see her. Sirius didn't know whether to laugh or cry knowing Lily was lingering near but he was unable to actually see her.

"Sirius," Marlene pressed.

Sirius snapped his attention back to her, his eyes burning with tears. "When the Killing Curse rebounded, it was powerful enough to dismantle all the wards and enchantments around the Hollow. It was strong enough to break the Fidelius. It was… it was powerful enough to break off another sliver of his soul."

"Sirius…" Andromeda trailed off, her face tugging down.

"It attached itself to the only living being in the room," Sirius barreled on, a stray tear escaping the corner of his eye. "It's how Voldemort can possess him so easily, it's why they can slip into each other's minds, it's how he can talk to snakes. A piece of Voldemort lives inside of him, inside his scar. That's the answer, Andy. The answer I've been searching for years for."

"How do we get it out?" Marlene asked, learning forward and propping her elbows on her knees. "How do you get rid of a Horcrux?"

"By destroying the vessel beyond repair," Sirius replied, his lips twisting.

"What?" Marlene gasped.

Sirius ran his fingers through his hair before scratching the back of his head. "Look, obviously, that's not an option. Dumbledore seems to think that the Horcrux can be destroyed if Harry willingly sacrifices himself and allows Voldemort to kill him. He thinks this will destroy the Horcrux but not Harry because it's how Harry survived all those years ago," he explained, leaving out the bit about the prophecy and Harry possessing power that Voldemort knows not. "Lily sacrificed her life out of pure love. Dumbledore seems to think this is the only way to destroy the soul sliver in Harry, because it's not a full Horcrux. But he also said Harry can't know this or it might not work. That's why this is imperative that this information doesn't leave this room."

Marlene rose from the sofa, her chest heaving. "You're going to allow this to happen? What if he dies?"

"No, I'm not going to allow this to happen!" Sirius snapped. "I'm not risking his life! My thinking is that if Voldemort can destroy his own soul shard, then maybe we can as well. I'm a Gaunt by blood. Maybe we can figure out a way to destroy it within him without Voldemort killing it."

Sirius snagged the book by Ominis Gaunt off his coffee table and held it out to Andromeda. She leaned forward, her fingers wrapping around the spine as she accepted it. Her eyes flickered down to the cover for a few moments before she started to flip through the pages.

"Gaunts have a special relationship with snakes," Sirius explained, reaching under his jumper and pulling Fluffernoodle free from around his shoulder. "Harry says this snake thinks I smell nice. He likes my blood. He won't fucking leave me alone. If he's not out hunting, he somehow manages to slip into my pockets or will curl around a body part. I've tried leaving him outside to rid of him, but he'd always find a way back in. I've just given in and accepted that he's my pet now."

"You think there will be some blood and snake potion that will help Harry?" Andromeda asked as she didn't look up from the book.

Sirius shrugged. "I thought it'd be worth a shot. Dumbledore said I'd have to be the one to brew it, but you could give me verbal instructions."

Andromeda looked up, her eyebrows raising. "What potion?"

"I haven't the foggiest idea," Sirius admitted. "That's where your expertise comes in."

Marlene crossed her arms over her chest. "You're not going to tell Harry why he's taking experimental potions?"

Sirius shot her a look. "We can't tell him in case we can't figure this out!"

Marlene let out an incredulous scoff. "So, if you can't fix him with your special snake potion, you're going to let him march to his death?"

Sirius' jaw tightened. "No! Of course, I'm not going to bloody well let him walk to his fucking death! But Harry is sixteen. He's a child. He doesn't need to know there's a soul shard locked in his head that nobody knows what to do about it besides let him die and hope for the best."

"Sirius, I don't think a potion can fix this," Andromeda whispered.

Sirius gritted his teeth, his attention snapping to his cousin. "That's not the bloody answer I'm looking for."

Andromeda's eyes searched Sirius' face. "It's not the answer I want to give, but I doubt there's anything he can ingest to destroy a Horcrux without killing him! What you're suggesting sounds like a poison directed solely at one part of the body – or in this case, thing inside the body. He can't just ingest something without it absorbing into his bloodstream and seeping into his organs."

Marlene looked up at the ceiling and squinted. "What if he didn't ingest it?"

Sirius looked over at Marlene. Now that was the kind of thinking he wanted to hear.

"What do you mean?" Andromeda pressed.

"Well, what if we… we sliced open his scar and poured a potion directly on the Horcrux?" Marlene pondered, her chin lowering so she could look at Sirius.

Sirius' gaze flickered to Andromeda.

"I mean, I suppose you could in theory," Andromeda reasoned. "Obviously, we'd numb the area and we would have to be careful not to open too deep. But we don't even know what a Horcrux looks like in order to pour a potion on it and not have it touch other parts of him. We don't even know what exactly the outcome will be. We'd have one shot. And you'd have to be honest with Harry before you do something like that to him."

Sirius nodded. "Can Ted do it?"

"Ted's a family Healer," Andromeda reasoned. "He doesn't perform procedures."

"But he could if we needed him to, right? Because the way I look at it, there's very few people I would trust to do this to Harry," Sirius reasoned. "We can let him know when we figure out the potion needed."

Andromeda sighed, his face falling. "That's a lot of pressure on Ted to do something he doesn't do. That's not the kind of Healing he practices. Ted would never be able to forgive himself if something happened to Harry."

Sirius turned to Marlene. "Can you do it? Bella Riddle was a Healer, right?"

Marlene pursed her lips. "I was a glorified Mediwitch, Sirius. I've probably done less Healing than Ted has."

Sirius rolled his head, grunting as he felt the pop. Honestly, he couldn't think of anyone else he was willing to allow in on what was happening.

"Can I take this book home?" Andromeda asked.

Sirius nodded, knowing he could buy another copy as soon as they both left. There were several in stock in a little bookshop in Hogsmeade. Andromeda rose from the sofa, making her way around the coffee table to stand in front of Sirius. She wrapped a hand behind his neck, pulling him down so she could envelop him into an embrace. Sirius melted in her arms.

"Give me until the new year, all right?" Andromeda whispered in his ear. "I want to thoroughly research this before we even attempt to brew a potion."

Sirius pressed his temple against her cheek. "Ask Ted if he'd be all right practicing for a procedure. If he is, the two of you can come by and I'll explain it to him."

Andromeda pulled back, her palm pressing against the sides of his face. She smiled tightly as him. Her thumb brushed along his cheek.

"Don't do anything rash, all right?" Andromeda pressed. "We'll figure this out."

Sirius' throat narrowed. "I'm scared, Andy."

"I think we all are," Andromeda replied in a soft voice. "I'll see you tomorrow. Remember, you're introducing Ted and me to Cepheus in the morning. Why don't you ask Harry if he wants to come as well?"

"He has Transfiguration at eight," Sirius told her.

Andromeda smiled. "I'll call him tonight on the mirror. I'll tell him to be ready for class and meet us at six thirty. He can at least visit for a few before he has to head to class. I'll bring some croissants and fruit for breakfast. Do you think that will help Cepheus feel at home?"

Sirius shrugged. "Maybe. I'll supply the coffee."

Andromeda rolled her eyes. "Tea as well, please, for Ted and me."

"I'll convert you," Sirius insisted.

Andromeda wrinkled her nose. "Not likely," she replied, patting him on the cheek gently, before she turned towards Marlene. "It was so nice seeing you again, Marlene. You know Ted and I are here if you need anything."

"Thanks, Andy," Marlene replied.

With that, Andromeda left with the book tucked under her arm. An uncomfortable wave flooded the parlor as he glanced over at Marlene to see her staring at him. Her lips were drawn into a thin line, her eyebrows low on her face. Sirius swallowed, readying himself for a fresh fight.

"I'll see you, Sirius," Marlene said inside, making her way past him.

Sirius furrowed his brow, following her out of the parlor and into the entryway. That was it? An I'll see you? She had nothing else to say to him? Wasn't she angry with him for keeping everything about Harry under a tight wrap?

"Oi!" Sirius shouted before she could leave.

Marlene shrugged on her coat. She observed Sirius carefully as she looped the scarf around her neck.

"What?" she asked in a flat tone.

"I just… I thought…" Sirius trailed off, unsure of what exactly he thought.

Marlene raised her eyebrows. "You thought what?"

Sirius crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged. "I don't know. I thought you'd rip me a new arsehole for not telling you all of this sooner."

Marlene shot him a wry smiled. "I already did that yesterday."

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, you did."

Marlene let out a long sigh. "Look, Sirius, I just want to be involved in Harry's life. I want to make sure he survives the war. We can keep our correspondence strictly about our godson, all right?"

Sirius pressed his molars together.

"I can't do this with you anymore," she continued in a whisper. "I can't force you to want to be in my life. I won't beg you to talk to me. You can keep running if you want to. You can keep shutting everyone out until none of us try anymore with you. But we need to continue to discuss Harry."

"I don't know what else to do," Sirius admitted with a sniff. "Everything is a painful reminder of what should have been."

Marlene took a step closer to him, her chin tilting up. "James and Lily wouldn't want you to live like this. The guilt, the shame, the running. They would want you to be happy. They would want you to live."

Sirius pursed his lips, his head nodding as he tried to keep his emotions at bay. "I killed them."

Marlene's fingers wrapped around his wrist. "You tried to save them," she insisted, squeezing his wrist. "You weren't wrong yesterday. You were always the fixer. You were always the one who did what the rest of us couldn't. You had seen how truly awful and terrible the world was in a way James, Lily, and I never did. You didn't trust anyone. You weren't afraid to get your hands dirty. You were always the type of person who would watch the world burn as long as the people you loved were safe. Fuck everyone else, right?"

"If I'm being honest, I still feel that way," Sirius admitted, his body sagging. "If Harry would agree to it, I'd take him and run. I'd let England fall to Voldemort without a care in the world. But I know Harry. I know he wouldn't be able to live with himself knowing what he knows. He's too damn noble. He's too much like James."

Marlene smiled up at him. "It's odd because I see so much of James in him, but I also see so much of Lily. Then there's these flickers of Fleamont and Euphemia sprinkled in. But, most of all, I see a lot of you in him. He reminds me so much of you when you were a teenager. How uncertain and uncomfortable you were."

Sirius hated that, but it wasn't the first time he had heard that.

"I remember you used to look at James a lot for reassurance," Marlene continued. "Like you were silently asking him if you had taken things too far or just to gauge his reaction on situations. Harry does that a lot as well. He'll look to you or Ginny or Ron."

"Yeah, I've noticed that too," Sirius whispered.

"Just his general demeanor as well," Marlene barreled on. "The way he only interacts with a select few people. The way he hesitates with new people. I mean, growing up with Petunia and Vernon, I know he didn't have the best childhood so I can assume that's why he's the way he is."

"They abused him and neglected him," Sirius confirmed. "When I first met him, he didn't have a single piece of clothing that fit. They were all two sizes too big for him and threadbare. He had the same pair of glasses since he was a kid with the same bloody prescription. He never once received any medical care. Any time you touched him, he would tense or shy away from the affection. It took a long time for him to become comfortable with me hugging him and now he can't get enough affection. The summer I escaped, I stopped by Little Whinging because I just wanted to see him. I watched as he ran away from that house with nowhere to go. He looked so lost. The first night I talked to him again, I offered him to come live with me and he jumped at the idea. I mean, Marly, he didn't even know me. He had tried to kill me just an hour prior, thinking I had betrayed his parents and wanted to murder him. He was that desperate to get away from the Dursleys. And I had to send him back. I couldn't keep him and I had to send him back there. He'd write me letters about how awful they were. He wrote it so casually, like it was just something everyone dealt with. I hated it. I hated everything about it."

"Did you ever pay them a visit?" Marlene asked. "Let them know you knew what they did to him?"

Sirius shook his head. "No, because I knew I wouldn't be able to control myself. I couldn't… I couldn't risk being arrested and sent back to Azkaban. I couldn't leave Harry again."

"Well, if you ever wanted to pay them a little visit, I'd go with you and ensure you kept your temper," Marlene suggested. "I'd love to have a word with Petunia."

The offer was very appealing. He'd love to make Petunia and Vernon squirm, to be scared and anxious like they had made Harry feel as a small child. He'd love to spend an afternoon just terrorizing them, making them beg not to do anything to them. Petunia was bound to remember him. He had met her a few times when he'd stop by Cokeworth with James. If she didn't, she sure as hell knew him as a mass murderer who had appeared on her telly. His face had been everywhere.

"That's very appealing," Sirius admitted, leaning into her. "Andy and Ted would love to come as well."

Marlene laughed. "The more the merrier."

They stared at each other for a few moments. Sirius' heart hammered in his chest. Before he could say or do anything, Marlene dropped his wrist and took a step back. She bid him a goodbye before she bolted from the house. Sirius' eyes slid closed, wishing he had said more than he did.

Continuing to have Ginny sleep in his bed seemed to be increasingly more difficult for one main reason: Ronald Bilius Weasley. Ron watched the two of them like a hawk when they said they were going to bed early since they were to meet with Harry's family early in the morning. But Ginny was stubborn. In fact, Harry had never met a more stubborn person in his life.

"I'm not going to let my brother of all people tell me that I can't spend the evening with my boyfriend," Ginny protested. "I know for a fact that he's skived off class to snog Niamh's face off in his bloody bed before."

Harry didn't want to be put in the middle – which seemed to happen more often than not. He supposed it was just something he'd have to get used to. Honestly, he just wished he knew someone who had been in a similar situation and give him some advice on what to do besides just sighing and staring between them.

When Harry made a motion to kiss her goodnight and go to their separate dorms, she smiled against his lips. Her hot breath tickled his skin as she ghosted her lips across his jaw until they lingered by his ear.

"Give me the Invisibility Cloak," she whispered.

Chills ran up Harry's spine. He was unable to say no to her. His eyes glanced over to Ron sitting with Ginny's friends. Niamh pulled Ron's face away from them, kissing him. Ginny's hand slipped into Harry's satchel and pulled out the cloak and shoved it in her own satchel. When the two pulled away, Harry saw Niamh give Ginny a thumbs up.

Harry knew they'd be caught. Again. But Harry couldn't find it within himself to care as soon as Ginny was in his arms. He slept better with her around. His Occlumency walls seemed stronger. There was no slipping into Voldemort's mind or Voldemort trying to possess him. Harry didn't know if that was because he was relaxed and happy or what. So, Harry placed the privacy charms around his bed when Ginny slid under the covers next to him and he made sure to stick the curtains together. He snuggled down next to Ginny, more than content.

As the two of them laid vis-à-vis, Ginny's nose brushing against his and her ice-cold toes pressing against his calf, Harry couldn't keep the goofy smile off his face. Suddenly, he managed not to care if Ron found out about their nightly sleepovers.

"You make me really happy," Harry whispered, knowing it was the closest he could get to three special words that terrified him to admit just in case Ginny didn't feel the same way.

Ginny's hand cupped his face, her thumb brushing along his cheekbone. "You make me happy too, Harry."

Another night of no nightmares, no possessions, no worries. Another night of pure bliss.

The next morning, Harry tried to suppress his groan as Ginny tiptoed across the dormitory towards the loo. He grabbed his glasses quick before he followed her, his eyes darting to each of the beds with the curtains drawn, hoping that they'd remain that way. Normally, Ginny snuck out of the dorm immediately to get ready in her own room. This time, well, this time Ginny obviously had another idea much to Harry's chagrin. He shut the bathroom door behind him as quietly as he could before he locked it. He turned around to stare at his girlfriend, his jaw tightening.

"Can't you do that in your dorm like always?" Harry whispered. "I don't want Ron to see yo– fuck, Gin!"

Ginny had taken off her shirt and stood in front of him in just a sports bra. He turned around as fast as he could, his arm hitting a shelf and knocking down a bunch of toiletry bags. He also forgot the door was closed and smashed his face into the wood trying to leave to give her privacy because he didn't know he wasn't supposed to follow her. Which, in hindsight, was stupid because it was the loo. Ginny shrieked and Harry's nose throbbed. He cussed like Ron on an average day as he turned around to face Ginny and regretted it. He covered his eyes with his hand.

"Are you all right?" Ginny gasped as she rushed towards him. "Your nose is bleeding!"

Harry could have guessed that. A metallic taste lingered on his lips.

"Fine," Harry grumbled.

Footfalls sounded from outside. The doorknob jiggled.

"Oi, Harry, are you all right?" Ron's voice called.

"Fine!" Harry shouted.

Ginny shoved something under his nose. He uncovered his eyes to see Ginny was still in her bra. Harry admired the freckles that littered her skin and the gentle slope of her collarbone for a moment before he screwed his eyes shut once more. He tilted his head back, holding the wad of tissues under his nose.

"Is it, err, well, I mean, does it involve a headache?" Ron asked in an odd tone.

Harry counted to five in his head. "No, I just tripped."

"I, uh, I can call Sirius if it's, you know, serious," Ron added.

"Merlin, no! Don't call him! I'm fine!" Harry said in a panicked tone.

The last thing he needed was for Sirius to be involved in this mess. He was already trying to figure out how to get Ginny out of the bathroom without Ron or any of their roommates seeing her.

"Well, if you're good, can you open the bloody door?" Seamus asked. "I have to piss, you know."

Harry thought Ron and Sirius were rubbing off on him. Several very creative expletives floated through his mind. He had to hide Ginny. He opened his eyes and looked down at Ginny. She was still the same as before. Why wasn't she putting on a shirt?

"Can you get dressed?" Harry hissed.

"What?" Ginny asked, before she looked down and went red.

"Gin!" Harry exclaimed, grabbing her by the shoulders and steering her towards one of the stalls. "Just hide for now, all right?"

"Oi, Harry, is someone in there with you?" Ron asked in a suspicious tone.

Harry shoved her into the stall and shut the door. He sealed it with his wand before he carded a hand through his hair.

"Just a minute!" Harry called.

Luckily, before opening the door, he noticed Ginny's shirt on the ground. He snagged it up and shoved it under his own shirt before he opened the door to the loo. A grin crossed his face and Harry had no doubt that he looked positively manic. He kept a hand pressed against his stomach to keep Ginny's shirt from falling out.

"Merlin fuck, Harry," Ron exclaimed. "Your nose is bleeding."

Harry clenched his teeth together. "I'm aware."

Seamus pushed past Harry, grumbling as he went. Neville peered in and saw the toiletry bags on the floor and immediately picked them up. Dean gave Harry an odd look before he followed Seamus. Ron gripped Harry's arm, leaning in too close for comfort.

"Was it… you know?" Ron pressed.

Harry scratched his fingers along his brow. "No," he said in a flat tone. "I just stupidly fell."

Ron stared at him. "Channeling your inner Tonks this morning?"

Harry licked his lip, wincing at the taste of blood. "Yeah, something like that. I'm just tired."

That was the wrong thing to say. Harry could see the worry cross Ron's face.

"You said that the exhaustion was the reason… you know," Ron pressed.

Dean and Seamus muttered under their breath as they left the loo. Neville lingered awkwardly for a few moments after picking up the mess Harry made before he too went back into the dorm.

"I'm fine," Harry insisted. "I was just waking up a bit."

Ron nodded, not looking convinced. "Yeah, all right. Well, you want to grab breakfast then before you go off to see Cepheus?"

Harry shook his head. "Apparently, Andy is bringing breakfast."

"And I didn't get an invite?" Ron protested. "Bloody well rude of her, don't you think? I'm your best mate, after all."

Harry raised his eyebrows. "I'll let her know."

"Good! You should! I doubt Sirius would have forgotten my invite. He respects the role of best mate," Ron replied, his head nodding. "Well, I'm going back to bed then if you're not going to eat with me. I'll just have to find someone else to dine with."

"I'm sure you'll manage," Harry assured him.

With that, Ron left the loo as well. Harry shut the door and locked it again. This time, he placed a privacy charm on it as well. He told Ginny she could come out. He pulled the shirt out from under his t-shirt, tossing it onto the sink. Harry made his way to the sink to clean the blood off his face. The stall opened and Ginny exited in her school uniform as she tucked away a bag into her pocket.

"Ready," she announced, running her fingers through her long hair to brush it out.

Harry turned around, wiping his face dry with a towel. "You're going to be the death of me."

Ginny smirked. "Well, that would be a feat considering more powerful wizards than me have tried and failed."

Harry couldn't help but chuckle. "Sneak out and wait for me downstairs, yeah? I'll just change quick."

Ginny crossed the room towards him. Her hands reached up and cupped his face, pulling him down to her height. Her lips crashed against his, eager and longing. Harry wrapped his arms around her waist, tugging her closer to him. He supposed a bloody nose wasn't that big of a deal, not if Ginny kissed and made it better afterward. And he got to see her in just her bra for the first thing in the morning. That image would definitely crop up in his dreams from now on.

I hope you enjoyed the latest chapter! We needed some fluffy Hinny at the end to break up all the angst and confrontation! They are definitely the happy sunshiny aspect of this story. Don't forget to drop a review! They motivate me to keep on chugging along!

Special thanks to prewettpotter! She's been fabulous!