"Brumous"
"Chapter Forty-Nine: Hot Girl Christmas"
The last thing Ginny wanted to do was go to her Aunt Muriel's for Christmas Eve. Honestly, she didn't understand why they even had to go. The last time she went to her Aunt Muriel's for Christmas she was nine years old. Huffing, Ginny pulled a jumper over her head before pulling her tangled hair out from under the collar. She brushed her hair, moving slower than necessary to minimize the time spent at her aunt's stuffy and musty home.
She just wanted to spend the day with Harry, like she did the previous year. Arguably, last year was rough with her dad at St. Mungo's and Harry being, well, Harry. But she enjoyed listening to Sirius sing Christmas carols at the top of his lungs. She loved eating Christmas dinner with both her family and her friends. She even liked how cheerful they were able to make Grimmauld Place, dashing bits of color in the rather dark decrepit house.
"Ginny! Ron!" her mother called from downstairs.
Ginny sucked in her breath, preparing herself for the evening. She grabbed her mirror off the bedside table and tucked it in her magically expanded back pocket. Just in case Harry called after leaving the Tonkses. For the first time since knowing Harry, Ginny had seen him genuinely excited to leave Hogwarts to go home. Andromeda had been calling him and Cepheus almost nightly, building excitement and chatting about all the sweets she was baking for them. Seeing Harry have a real family made Ginny feel guilty for wanting him to be with her on the holidays like before, especially since Harry's entire family would be spending Christmas day at the Burrow.
Her bedroom door burst open and Ron poked his head in with a scowl plastered across his face. He was just as pleased to be spending Christmas Eve with Aunt Muriel as she was.
"Oi, ever heard of knocking?" Ginny snapped.
Ron shrugged. "Yes, but siblings," he reasoned, gesturing between the two of them as though she had forgotten she was attached to him for life.
"I could have been naked," Ginny retorted.
Ron's face pulled. "Well, if you were naked, you should be bloody locking your door! If you don't lock it, brothers can enter."
Ginny rolled her eyes. "That's not at all remotely how that works. Knocking says you respect my privacy, you dolt."
Ron sighed. "There is no privacy within families, Ginny. Where have you been?" he questioned, his head shaking. "Now, get downstairs and stay close to me at Aunt Muriel's. I can't bloody well stand her! I don't know why we couldn't just go to Andromeda and Ted's. George said we were all invited. He overheard Andromeda inviting Mum and Dad at an Order meeting."
"Ugh," Ginny responded in a disgusted tone as she followed Ron out of her room. "Don't tell me that. Why didn't we go there?"
Ron bent down so his lips were close to her ear. "Apparently, they didn't want us intruding on Harry's first real holiday with family."
Ginny thought that was beyond stupid. Their families had been fully intertwined since the summer before her fourth year. Sirius and Ginny's mum were close, always gossiping and laughing together. Her dad and Sirius would discuss flying automobiles. Harry had a brotherly relationship with not only Ron but Fred and George as well. Ron and Cepheus had become quick friends. Andromeda and Ted seemed like lovely people. Ginny didn't understand her parents' reasoning. She couldn't help but silently curse her family as her parents ushered them through the fireplace to their aunt's house.
Upon arriving at Aunt Muriel's, Ginny realized they were the first to arrive as she was forced into an embrace and criticized for her appearance. Apparently, Christmas Eve required formal attire and not a jumper. Ron received the same treatment, as well as being told his hair was too long to be considered proper. Ginny and Ron exchanged looks, forcing smiles on their faces as they slouched next to each other on the sofa in the parlor.
It took a half-hour for the next of their family to arrive. Bill arrived with Charlie, whom Ron had told her was in town after he saw him at Hagrid's with Harry, and a rather nasty surprise. Ginny inwardly groaned when she saw Phlegm with her brothers. Why was she even here? Didn't she have anything better to do than tag along? Ginny ignored the nasty glare she received from Aunt Muriel as she rolled her eyes.
"Merlin, Ronnie, you keep growing," Charlie said, obviously trying to break the tension as the gave Ron a one-armed embrace.
Ron snorted. "That or you shrunk."
"Oi!" Charlie exclaimed with a smile dancing on his lips. "We can't all be tall and gangly like you, little brother."
Ron grinned. "Well, you're only taller than Ginny and Mum, that's not a great feat, Charlie."
Charlie pushed him away. "Fuck off."
Aunt Muriel huffed, ceasing her discussion with Fleur about how goblin tiaras, like hers, should always be used at formal functions, to shoot Charlie a particularly nasty look. Charlie seemed unbothered by it.
"Why aren't you staying with Mum and Dad?" Ginny asked, looking up at her brother.
"Honestly, I wanted the option not to come today," Charlie whispered. "But Bill was being a right pain in my ruddy arse so I ended up coming anyway. My original plan was to surprise Mum and Dad on Christmas day."
"Glad you graced us with your presence," Ron commented. "Fred and George have yet to make an appearance."
When Fred and George didn't show up in time for dinner, Aunt Muriel insisted they eat without them. Ginny was blessed to hear her great aunt complain about the lack of manners from not only Fred and George, but from Percy as well. Apparently, Percy had declined Aunt Muriel's invitation. Ginny's mum stared at her plate of food and looked as though she were attempting not to burst into tears. Ginny's dad only smiled tightly, not making any comment when Percy's name was uttered, but instead focused on how the twins had to make sure the shop was running smoothly for the holiday. Ginny knew that was a lie. The shop was closed for both Christmas Eve and Christmas day.
An hour after dinner finished up, Fred and George wandered into the house with apologies and a fake story about a store emergency. Fred caught Ginny's eye and winked at her. The bloody bastards. They had been the smart ones, arriving late with some sincere sounding story and some of Aunt Muriel's favorite elf-made wine as an apology. Aunt Muriel didn't even chastise them as they charmed her with smiles and a joke. The twins were her favorite out of the bunch somehow. Ginny didn't understand it. Ginny suspected it was because they reminded her painfully of her nephews Gideon and Fabian. From what little Ginny knew about them, they had been twins and jokesters as well.
While Bill and Fleur competed to be Aunt Muriel's favorites by sitting with her in the parlor and chatting about goblin politics, Ginny and the rest of her brothers hid out in the kitchen while the house-elves cleaned up after dinner. George found a bottle of Blishen's Firewhisky and took a large swig before passing it amongst the siblings.
"How dare you not tell us you're coming to town?" Fred accused, shooting a look at Charlie.
Charlie chuckled, taking a sip of firewhisky. "Because I didn't want to come to this fucking dinner. Nice way to escape a bulk of the night, by the way. Fuckers."
George grinned, snagging the firewhisky. "You were the moron for staying with Bill. Of course, he was going to make you come. If you would have stayed with us, we would have encouraged you to pretend you hadn't arrived yet."
"Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes," Charlie mused, eyeing Ginny as she grabbed at the firewhisky. "Oi, Ginny, you shouldn't be drinking that."
Ginny shot Charlie a glare. "I can hold my liquor better than you," she retorted, though she wasn't entirely sure that was true. It wasn't like she drank often in her dorm.
"She may be small but she is mighty," George said thoughtfully. "I hope she drinks you under the bloody table, Charlie."
Charlie appraised Ginny for a few moments. "How's your boyfriend?"
Ginny rolled her eyes, trying not to wince as the whisky burned down her throat. Yeah, she was definitely not much of a whisky drinker. Surprisingly, because she had seen Demelza drink it without even flinching. Ginny suspected that she hadn't accomplished that.
"Why are you asking?" Ginny challenged, shoving the bottle into Ron's hands.
Charlie shrugged. "I mean, it's Harry Potter."
"Yes, it's that Harry," Ginny confirmed, wondering where her brother was going.
Charlie glanced over at the twins briefly. "Well, he's in the center of the war," he said carefully, his eyes flickering back to Ginny. "I just don't want you getting hurt is all."
"I can take care of myself," Ginny snapped, somehow resisting the urge to tell him to piss off. "Being with Harry isn't going to change my danger level."
"Look, Harry is a good bloke," Charlie clarified. "Seemed like an amazing gent when I met him during the Triwizard Tournament. Not to mention, the way Ron talks about him like he's in love."
"Oi!" Ron exclaimed, his hand waving. "Best mates! I am allowed to talk about my best mate in a completely adoring way."
Charlie let out a small chuckle. "Look, all I'm saying is that I worry about you, Ginny."
"Well, don't," Ginny snapped, her arms crossing over her chest.
Charlie looked at the twins as though he expected them to back him up.
"We like Harry," George clarified before taking a sip of firewhisky. "We approve of them together."
Fred nodded, snatching the firewhisky. "You will not find a Weasley who disapproves. Well, unless you're a git named Percy. But who the fuck cares what that wanker thinks?"
"I don't disapprove," Charlie explained, his hands shoving in his pockets. "I like Harry. I just think maybe the two of you should wait to date until after the war."
"Because he's the Chosen One or whatever tosh they're calling him now?" Ginny asked, her face twisting. "I don't care about that. I lo–"
Ginny stopped herself before she could admit to her big brothers that she was completely and irrevocably in love with Harry Potter. She didn't want another boyfriend. She had no interest in dating other boys. If something happened that caused her relationship to crumble with Harry, she suspected she'd die a spinster like her Aunt Muriel. There was just something about Harry that pulled her towards him: his kindness, his humor, his lop-sided smile, the fierce way in which he loved. He was pure perfection. Ginny couldn't see how any other bloke could even measure up to Harry Potter.
"Oh," Fred said, wiggling his eyebrows. "Does Harry know you looove him?"
Ginny remained stoic, her chin tilting up as she refused to answer.
"Aww, I didn't know it was love so soon!" George exclaimed. "When's the wedding? Will you beat Bill and Fleur to an engagement?"
Ron had an annoyingly goofy smile on his face. "Has either one of you said it yet? Harry doesn't tell me anything. Which, I'm completely fine with because I don't need to hear about him sucking off your bleeding face, but this is something I'd like to hear about!"
"Well, I don't think they'll beat Bill and Fleur to an engagement," Charlie said in a nonchalant tone. "I went ring shopping with Bill the other day."
"No!" George exclaimed, his head snapping to Charlie. "He's going to propose to her?"
Ginny let out a small sigh at the change in topic. The twins seemed to be focused on the Bill gossip. Ron, however, peered at her curiously.
"You should let Harry say it first," Ron suggested in a low tone. "He doesn't deal well with, you know, emotions. You might send him into crisis mode."
Ginny glared at him. "I don't need relationship advice from you, of all people."
Ron huffed. "He's my best mate. I know him better than anyone," he explained, his eyes glancing at their brothers for a brief moment.
"I don't think you give him enough credit," Ginny reasoned, annoyance tinging her words. "He's capable of giving and receiving love without having a mental breakdown, especially since he moved in with Sirius. He's far more open than he's ever been because he's constantly surrounded by people who finally give a shit."
The door to the kitchen opened and everyone froze. George hid the firewhisky behind his back. When they noticed it was just their dad, everyone let out a collective sigh of relief.
"I resent the fact that I wasn't invited," Ginny's dad announced as he shut the door behind him. "You all know Muriel is a nightmare!"
George presented the firewhisky. "Want to join your children in getting completely pissed before we have to make an appearance again?"
"I should say no and scold you all, but… desperate times," Ginny's dad said with a grin as he accepted the bottle of firewhisky. "Your mother will have my head."
Fred winked. "We won't say a thing."
"Oi, Dad, next year can we accept the Tonkses invitation for Christmas Eve?" Ron asked. "I bet they're having a better night than we are."
"Oh, I'm sure we can convince your mother that it's a fabulous idea," Ginny's dad replied with a wink before taking a sip of the firewhisky. "We have twelve months to plan for it."
Ginny laughed, enjoying the small amount of time she had with just her brothers and her dad. Although, her dad refused to allow Ron and Ginny to drink the firewhisky to avoid any unnecessary wrath from Ginny's mum. That didn't bother Ginny. She smiled as her family chatted while hiding in the kitchen away from Aunt Muriel, her mind wandering to how Harry's Christmas Eve was going.
Harry stood outside of the Tonks' house, balancing two tarts in either hand. Cepheus had the third one while Sirius held onto a bag filled with presents. Somehow, someway, Sirius managed Apparating all three of them while keeping the tarts intact. Though he knew Andromeda wouldn't be upset if the ground ate the tarts, Harry wanted to make a good first impression for his first holiday with his newfound family. Besides, they spent hours the previous day on the tarts. It had been challenging to convince Sirius to sit and drink coffee as far away from the tarts as humanly possible.
The door opened to reveal Ted beaming at them. He ushered them inside, grabbing one of the tarts from Harry's hands. He led them towards the back of the house where the kitchen was. Andromeda stood at the counter, arranging a grazing platter. She smiled as she wiped her hands on her apron before rushing over towards them.
"Merlin, Sirius, I said bring a tart, not a bloody tart feast!" Andromeda exclaimed as she hugged Harry first, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
Sirius rolled his eyes, dropping the bag by the door before he went over to grab some cheese from the platter. Andromeda hugged Cepheus next, kissing him on the cheek as well before she made her way over to Sirius. She held her arms open and, with a few grapes in his hand, Sirius hugged her.
"Happy Christmas, Andy," Sirius greeted. "You said bring tarts, so we brought fucking tarts."
Andromeda laughed, pulling back and pressing her hands against Sirius' face. "You're too much. You do know it's just all of us plus Dora and Remus, don't you?"
Sirius popped a grape in his mouth, offering Andromeda a smile and a nod. She laughed again, shaking her head and rounding the counter to continue to prep food. Harry joined her, accepting an apron she summoned from the little coat rack in the corner. Sirius, Cepheus, and Ted sat across from them munching on the grazing platter. Cepheus seemed quieter than normal as he slowly ate his food and listened without joining the conversation. Harry could only assume his melancholy was because he missed Charlotte.
Before long, the kitchen door opened revealing Remus and Tonks. They greeted everyone with broad smiles. Tonks, not so nonchalantly, held her hand to her face showing off the glittering diamond ring Remus had shown Harry the other day. Andromeda screamed as she rushed towards her daughter. Sirius clapped Remus on the back.
"You finally did it," Sirius said with a wide grin. "I thought you'd never get around to actually doing it."
Remus shoved Sirius away from him in time for Andromeda to swoop Remus into a hug. Ted embraced Tonks, pressing a kiss to the top of her bubble gum pink head and exclaiming his little girl was all grown up. Ted wiped away a tear, not even trying to hide it. Harry pushed his glasses up his nose before he rounded the counter and lingered awkwardly as Ted pulled Remus into an embrace. Sirius leaned down to Cepheus and whispered something that Harry couldn't hear.
Remus stepped around Ted towards Harry, an easy smile spreading across his lips as he gestured for Harry to give him a hug. Harry hesitated a second before he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Remus for the first time in his life.
"I may have done everything Ginny and her friends said to do for the proposal," Remus whispered in Harry's ear. "Be sure to thank them for me."
Harry pulled back, a soft smile gracing his face. "Of course, but you know Ginny will want the play by play tomorrow."
Remus chuckled, squeezing Harry's arm. "I'll be sure to tell her tomorrow," he replied, the bright smile never fading from his face. "I'm sure Molly and Fleur will want to hear all about it as well."
After more congratulations and hugs, Harry helped Andromeda set the table in the dining room. Ted lit the candles in the centerpiece with the tip of his wand while Sirius fiddled with the Warming Charms on the house because the house was a tad bit too warm.
After everything was ready for dinner, Sirius pressed a hand on the back of Harry's neck and leaned in close. "Why don't you sit between Cepheus and me? I know he feels most comfortable with you."
Harry nodded, taking the middle seat on one side of the table. Remus and Tonks sat across from them while Andromeda and Ted took the heads of the table. Harry noticed that there was zero alcohol at the dinner. Instead, the crystal glasses were filled with sparkling water and there was a decanter of some kind of punch. Harry glanced over at his godfather to see him sharing a look with Andromeda.
"No coffee?" Sirius joked.
Andromeda rolled her eyes, a smile dancing on her lips. "I'll make you some after dinner, Merlin, Sirius!"
"No!" Tonks exclaimed. "Let me do it. Please? I really want to do it."
"I don't know if I trust you to do it," Sirius accused, peering across the table at her.
"If I can make tea just fine, then I can make coffee as well," Tonks retorted. "Have some faith in me, Sirius. Sheesh!"
"But why do you want to do it?" Sirius pressed, grabbing his glass and taking a sip. "I don't know if I fully trust you."
Tonks merely smiled, her eyes sparkling, as she picked up her knife and fork. Sirius jaw jutted out, his gaze boring into Tonks. Harry suspected that nobody could frustrate Sirius as easily as Tonks. They were polar opposites personality wise. Sirius struggled around sunshiny people the most. Harry could see Sirius fighting his annoyance because Tonks was family and it was Christmas Eve.
The rest of dinner flowed nicely. While it wasn't as loud and boisterous as a Weasley family dinner, Harry found himself smiling throughout the meal as Tonks told the story of how Remus had proposed. It wouldn't be a Tonks-Black-Potter dinner without Sirius and Andromeda bickering about their horrid family in between talk of work, school, and Quidditch.
"I am telling you, Pollux dressed up as Father Christmas one year," Andromeda insisted.
Sirius looked at her like she had sprouted two heads. "He was an absolute arse. There's no way he did something that cheerful. I don't remember that at all."
"You were probably three or four," Andromeda insisted. "There's a picture of you hugging him. I know I've seen it."
"Pollux didn't hug," Sirius said in a flat tone, his face pulling. "I can't recall a time he ever showed a speck of affection towards any of us. He used us as props in public by attempting to be a doting grandfather. But behind closed doors, all he did was scream at us to behave properly because we were embarrassing the Black family by acting like bloody children."
"I know our family is beyond dreadful, but our very early childhood wasn't completely awful," Andromeda reasoned. "I think you have a hard time remembering that there were some decent times sprinkled in."
"Yeah, well, you didn't live with Walburga and Orion," Sirius snapped, a sneer working its way across his face. "You didn't have to go through heir training. I remember thinking I was going to lose my fucking mind at five years old from all the ruddy heir talk."
"Merlin, Sirius, our families were always together," Andromeda insisted. "Narcissa and I jumped at every opportunity to go to Grimmauld to see you and Reggie. Uncle Alphard always had us by his house or took us out to have fun. My favorite childhood memories are Uncle Alphard taking us to a park where we could just be kids."
"Yeah, he tried to give us some semblance of a normal childhood," Sirius agreed. "He was the only sane one of the bloody bunch."
"Violetta adored you," Andromeda reasoned, pointing her fork at him. "You were definitely her favorite."
Sirius shot Andromeda a tight closed-mouth smile. Harry only looked between the two, trying to keep up with the conversation and trying to place how everyone was related in the Black family. There were so many of them that it was hard to keep track. Luckily, Ted was just as confused as Harry was.
"Who is Violetta again?" Ted inquired.
"Our great-grandmother," Sirius supplied in a dry tone. "It's hard to recall the good times with her when you remember she murdered her own son for being a Squib."
"No!" Tonks exclaimed, her jaw dropping. "You're joking!"
"It was a rumor," Andromeda placated.
"Yeah, funny how he mysteriously died a couple of weeks after not receiving a Hogwarts letter," Sirius challenged, his finger pointing at Andromeda. "Besides, don't you remember that one Christmas when Cassiopeia got completely sloshed at Christmas Eve? She bloody admitted it! It's why she never married or had kids. She was petrified of having a Squib."
"Who's Cassiopeia again?" Ted asked, benefiting everyone at the table.
"Sirius and I share grandparents, Pollux and Irma. Pollux had a brother Marius who was the Squib and a sister named Cassiopeia. So, she is our great aunt," Andromeda clarified. "As Sirius so eloquently put it, she never married nor had children. She was a drunk who died alone a few years ago."
"Don't forget their sister Dorea, but she never came around," Sirius added, his gaze turning towards Harry. "Smart woman. She married a Potter."
"Really?" Harry perked up. "Who?"
"Charlus Potter," Sirius replied, his face scrunching up. "There's no direct blood line between you and I, if that's what you're thinking. James and I worked it out years ago. I believe he was descended from Fleamont's great-uncle or something. Distant relation. Fleamont didn't see him at all beyond a reunion or two. I know they had a son… Perseus, I believe. Apparently, Walburga didn't think the union prestigious enough so she never added the Potter line on her little family tree."
"Are Charlus or Perseus still alive?" Harry questioned, wondering if he'd ever meet someone with the last name Potter.
Sirius squinted. "I know Dorea is dead. Died when I was a teenager. I never heard anything more about Charlus or Peruses. I don't even know if Perseus married or had kids, honestly."
"Charlus died," Andromeda clarified. "I remember reading about it in the paper. Nymphadora was at school, so it wasn't terribly long ago. I want to say the late eighties."
Harry looked down at the table, his gaze burning into his nearly-eaten plate of food. There had been someone else who could have taken him in besides the Dursleys. Maybe if asked, Charlus Potter would have given him a home until he died. Maybe he could have moved in with Perseus after Charlus' death until Sirius was freed from prison. Maybe he wouldn't have had such an awful childhood. Except, they had never even attempted to reach out to him. Surely, they knew who Harry was and that they shared a surname. Charlus had met his grandfather before. Did they just not care at all?
Sirius wrapped an arm around Harry's chair, his palm pressing against Harry's shoulder. Harry swallowed down the confusion he felt as he leaned in closer to Sirius. He didn't need any distant Potter relation. He had Sirius, Andromeda, Ted, Cepheus, Tonks, and Remus. They were his real family. He shouldn't be disappointed by something that never was or by random people he never met just because they shared a last name.
Sirius cleared his throat. "Okay, back to the original topic of discussion. Nobody ever dressed up as Father Christmas for us!"
"I am going to find that picture!" Andromeda exclaimed, throwing her hands up.
"And I'll make sure you didn't charm it to fit your narrative!" Sirius protested.
"Sirius, I swear to Merlin…" Andromeda trailed off, her head shaking.
"I just want to say, I think Sirius should dress up as Father Christmas for us all today," Tonks said loudly with a smirk. "Could you imagine? The grumpiest Father Christmas to ever exist."
Sirius only rolled his eyes as he sucked in a deep breath.
"We will even allow you to sing God Rest Ye, Merry Hippogriffs as well," Tonks added.
"Yeah, I'll need to be drunk again to do that," Sirius retorted.
Harry tried to keep the frown off his face, his bottom lip sliding between his teeth. Andromeda shot Harry a worried look.
"There will be no alcohol talk in this house!" Andromeda exclaimed, shooting a pointed look at Sirius.
"Okay, but, Sirius, promise me, when Remus and I have a kid–" Tonks started to speak as Remus spit out the water in his mouth all over the expensive-looking tablecloth, "–that you'll dress up as Father Christmas one year and put a smile on your face and charm your beard white."
Harry looked between pale Remus, a giddy Tonks, and an irritated Sirius.
"Sure," Sirius said in a monotone voice. "I'll even sing your silly little Christmas carols too."
Tonks clapped, her body vibrating in her chair. "This is amazing. I will preserve this memory in a Pensieve so you have to do it when we have a kid."
"That won't be any time soon!" Remus said in a loud voice.
Harry waited for Sirius to give his no baby is a mistake but a pleasant surprise speech, but he didn't. Maybe he only reserved that speech for accident babies like Harry. He turned back to his dinner, picturing Sirius attempting to be jolly and enthusiastic. A smile quirked on his lips as he pictured it. He couldn't help but hope that Remus and Tonks had a baby sooner rather than later just so he could see Sirius playing Father Christmas.
When dinner was over, Andromeda and Ted cleared the plates. Harry moved to help but Andromeda ordered him to stay seated. Tonks sprinted off to the kitchen to make coffee for Sirius.
"I'm not drinking it," Sirius whispered out of the corner of his mouth.
Harry stared at his godfather. "It's not like she's going to poison it."
"Not intentionally," Sirius retorted, his lips curving.
Andromeda brought in an array of desserts, including the three tarts that Harry and Cepheus baked. When Tonks entered the dining room with three brightly colored yellow thermoses, Harry understood why she was adamant that she made the coffee. Harry accepted the personalized thermos with a broad grin on his face.
"Happy Christmas! If I have to wear red for Harry's Quidditch matches, you can represent Hufflepuff for me every time you Gryffindor boys drink your disgusting coffee," Tonks explained.
Sirius looked up at Tonks. "You think I care about something as insignificant as house pride? It's just a bloody color."
"Don't ruin this moment for me, Sirius," Tonks replied, holding up a hand. "Drink your ruddy coffee and make me smile."
"Don't worry, I helped her brew it," Ted announced as he cut the treacle tart before handing a rather large slice to Harry and then moving on to the lemon one to cut a slice for Cepheus.
Sirius brought the thermos to his lips and took a sip. "Mmm, tastes like badger."
Harry couldn't help laughing. He thanked Tonks for his Christmas gift before he digging into his tart. Harry wondered what Sirius bought for her from all of them. He really hoped it was be something that would make her laugh.
Sirius woke up early on Christmas morning, before the sun dared to even think about rising. With his badger approved yellow thermos in hand, he placed the boys' presents under the tree. For some bloody stupid reason, he manically rearranged them to make sure that they were evenly distributed. Then, he counted at least ten times to ensure that Harry and Cepheus had the same number of gifts. Five for each boy. Normally, he only bought Harry one gift but for some reason it looked pathetic to only have two gifts under the towering tree.
His eyes flickered to the big rectangular box in the back. It was the chest he bought to store the memories from James and Lily. A lump formed in his throat, wondering when Harry would want to watch the memories and if he'd want Sirius to join him. He placed the letter from Lily on top of the vials so Harry would understand what it was because knew he wouldn't be capable of explaining it to Harry.
Sirius' eyes roamed across the presents, wondering if he should have bought more to make up for all the years he had missed in both of their lives. He definitely had the means. He was free so he could actually leave the bloody house and browse the shops. Leaning back into the sofa, Sirius brought the thermos to his lips and took a long slow sip. His eyes stared at the Christmas tree and he couldn't help but think of all the wasted Christmases spent in Azkaban, bitterness building in his chest.
Sirius should be more grateful that he had his life back. He was finally able to fulfill his godfather duties and be present for his nephew. But he couldn't help thinking about all the ways Azkaban royally fucked him up. He was fucked up before, surely, but Azkaban had been a unique hell that undid all the progress from Fleamont and Euphemia's unconditional love and support.
While therapy and his depression potion made him feel more like his old self, he couldn't shake the immense guilt that clung to his skin like a leech. Guilt for his godson growing up abused, guilt for the hell Marlene lived through, guilt for releasing his frustrations on Andromeda, guilt for the arrogance that killed his two best friends.
Sirius always battled intrusive thoughts. Some days he managed relative happiness. Other days, he couldn't stop thinking about everything he ruined. Holidays were the worst because he couldn't stop ruminating that Harry deserved to spend his holidays with James and Lily instead of settling with him.
Days like this, Sirius felt like a stain. He felt abhorrent. He felt like a bête noire. Days like this, he could hear Walburga hissing nasty words in his ear.
The floorboards creaked and Sirius snapped his head towards the noise. Harry stood in the doorway with two neatly wrapped presents in each hand. He smiled at Sirius as he crossed the room and sat them under the tree.
"You're up early," Sirius commented. "You all right?"
Harry nodded, his hands wiping on his pajama bottoms as he turned to face Sirius. "Yeah, I just, well, I woke up and remembered I didn't put your and Cepheus' gifts under the tree. I was going to go back to bed after, but… are you all right?"
Sirius offered Harry a tight smile. "Yeah, I'm all right. Just playing Father Christmas."
Harry grinned. "You dressing up for me and everything?"
A bark-like laugh escaped Sirius' lips. "Maybe if you were a decade younger I would. Little kid you would have appreciated it. Sixteen-year-old you would just take the piss out of me."
"Never," Harry replied, his eyes sparkling.
Sirius swallowed, his head gesturing towards the big present in the back. "I found something at Godric's Hollow that I never knew existed. It's… well, it's rather personal. I didn't know if you wanted to open it up while Cepheus was sleeping."
The smile fell from Harry's lips, his brows disappearing behind his glasses. "Oh. Yeah, I guess?"
"The big one in the back," Sirius instructed, his hands tightening around his thermos.
Harry made his way to the tree, hoisting the big present up in his arms. He sat it on the coffee table in front of Sirius and carefully unwrapped it. Sirius watched Harry's face closely.
"I bought the chest," Sirius clarified. "The contents inside were what I found in your parents' wardrobe."
Harry opened the chest, his limbs trembling. He stared down inside, unmoving. Slowly, he reached down and picked up the letter from Lily. Sirius watched his godson's bright green eyes glide across the parchment. Tears sprung to Harry's eyes, but nothing fell down his cheeks. Sirius swallowed down his own emotions.
Sniffing, Harry looked up at Sirius with the tears still brimming in his eyes. "Did you watch any of them?"
Sirius shook his head. "They were meant for you."
"My mum said I was supposed to watch them with you," Harry pointed out in a soft voice.
"I will if you want me to," Sirius said in a hoarse voice. "But I don't have to if you'd rather watch them alone."
"I want you to," Harry said in a sure voice. "You knew them better than anyone. You are their family too."
A single strangled sob escaped Sirius' lips as he rose from the sofa. He rounded the coffee table and pulled Harry close to his chest, one hand tangling in his unruly black hair. Harry clung to him, his fingers clutching at Sirius' jumper. Sirius pressed a kiss on the top of his godson's head.
"I love you, kid," Sirius said, his grip tightening around Harry when he felt wetness soak through his jumper.
Harry didn't say anything. Sirius couldn't blame him. He knew Harry well enough to know that he was attempting to reel in his emotions. So, Sirius held him. His cheek rested against the top of Harry's head. A strand of wild hair tickled Sirius' nose. Harry pulled away first, glasses smudged with dried tears and his nose slightly red. Reaching out, Sirius carefully plucked Harry's glasses off his face and cleaned them with the hem of his jumper. Harry fidgeted in front of him.
"Sorry," Harry burst out, wiping his fingers under his eyes.
Sirius glanced at Harry. Offering the kid a closed-mouth smile, he slid the glasses back onto Harry's face. His hands pressed on either side of his godson's face as a hard lump formulated in the pit of Sirius' stomach.
"Never apologize to me for showing emotion, all right?" Sirius said in a hoarse voice. "I know I'm not one to show emotions, but I want you to feel safe and comfortable with me. I will never judge you and I am always be here for you."
Harry licked his bottom lip as Sirius dropped his hands to Harry's shoulders. "My aunt and uncle didn't like it when I cried," he whispered. "They would yell for me to stop crying or to shut up. How I felt never mattered."
Sirius tightened his grip on Harry's shoulder. "I care how you feel about everything," he replied in a fierce tone, knowing he had to come clean with Harry about seeing the Dursleys. "You should know that Marlene and I stopped by the Dursleys last week."
Harry stiffened underneath Sirius' touch. "Why would you do that?"
"Because you say things about your childhood that horrify me, especially when you say them in the most nonchalant way possible," Sirius explained.
"They hated me," Harry replied with a flat stilted voice. "They hated my mum and dad too."
"That's not an excuse, Harry," Sirius said in a gentle tone. "Nobody should lay hands on a child."
"It wasn't that bad," Harry insisted, his voice slightly panicky.
Sirius searched Harry's face. "It was, Harry. It was really bad. I say that as someone who thought they had a shitty childhood. But Walburga and Orion never beat me until I was so much older. Anytime I was sent to my room without dinner, more often than not, Uncle Alphard knew about it and always sprung me from punishment with a sandwich. When Walburga was in one of her rages, Uncle Alphard took Regulus and I out of that house for a few days. We stayed with him until she settled down. I had escapes that I know you didn't have. The Blacks didn't even hate me until I became a mouthy defiant teenager."
Harry didn't speak. His green eyes stared intensely into Sirius' very fucking soul.
"I will never hurt you," Sirius whispered. "You know that, don't you?"
Harry gave a jerky nod.
"Nothing you say or do will ever make me dislike you, let alone hate you, okay? I need you to know that," Sirius continued, feeling tears burning his own eyes. "I will get exasperated or annoyed with you one day because you can't seem to stay out of trouble to save your bloody life, but I will always love you. Always, Harry. I never want you to worry or question if I love you."
"I love you too, Sirius," Harry croaked.
Sirius forced a smile on his lips. "I may have broken Vernon's fucking nose. He deserved much worse but I rather like living with you, so I didn't do more in fear of arrest."
Harry let out a breath of air. "Sirius."
"I talked to Dudley," Sirius added, wondering how to approach this topic. "He wanted you to know that he was sorry for everything he did to you. There was genuine remorse there. I'm not saying you need to do anything with that. Merlin knows, I will hold a grudge until the day I die. But I thought you should know. Sometimes, when we're young, we don't know what our parents tell us is wrong. I held some very fucked up blood purist ideas when I was young, because that's what I was taught. James could easily have told me to fuck off the first time I casually used the term Mudblood. But he didn't. He told me why I shouldn't say it and how old pureblood ideology was disgusting. I listened. I learned that a most of my childhood was just a bunch of blood purists pumping me full of propaganda."
"I don't… I don't know how to feel about it," Harry admitted.
"You don't have to feel anything right now," Sirius replied, his hand cupping the side of Harry's neck. "I want to be as honest with you as I can."
Sirius really fucking did. There was so much that Sirius couldn't tell Harry. About the prophecy, his scar, and the war. He needed to be honest with Harry with everything else so he didn't completely lose the kid's trust. Harry trusted him. Painfully so. Sirius could see it in his eyes whenever Harry looked at him. Harry nodded, seeming to understand.
For the rest of the morning, the two drank coffee and chatted on the sofa while they waited for Cepheus to wake up. Neither Harry nor Sirius cared that Cepheus was having a bit of a lie-in. Sirius knew Cepheus' first Christmas without his mum would be hard. Charlotte had been an amazing mother, protecting and loving her son as fiercely as Sirius protected and loved Harry. Sirius had seen Cepheus withdraw into himself on Christmas Eve, barely chatting or smiling with anyone. There wasn't much Sirius could do to help him. While Cepheus seemed more comfortable with him lately, Sirius caught flickers of fear on and off in his nephew's gray eyes.
When Cepheus finally made an appearance, he shot the two an apologetic smile as he placed his two gifts under the tree. Sirius watched the boys open their presents, laughing when Harry and Cepheus tried on their matching leather jackets. A hand-carved Pensieve for Harry and a Firebolt for Cepheus. A stack of advanced Defense books for Harry and several photo albums filled with pictures of Regulus as a child for Cepheus. Because Sirius was a paranoid git, he gave the boys matching astronomy globes that could fit in the palm of their hands. All they needed to do was touch Canis Major and Sirius would be alerted they needed him as well as know their exact location. He had connected his watch to the globes. He thought the boys could carry the globes in their pockets just in case something happened.
Sirius laughed when he opened Harry's gift: a cookbook dedicated to the fine art of sandwich making and a figurine of a black dog riding a motorbike. Pulling Harry close to his side, he pressed a kiss to his temple as Harry pointed out a coronation chicken sandwich that he wanted Sirius to practice making while he was away at school.
"It is possible to make a sandwich without ham and mustard," Harry pointed out with a grin, his eyes sparkling.
Sirius only ruffled his hair. "You're a pain in my arse, you know that?" he said in an affectionate tone, unable to keep the wide grin off his face.
Cepheus had bought Sirius an array of crossword puzzle books, both magical and Muggle. Sirius pulled Cepheus into a warm embrace, elated when Cepheus returned the hug without tensing up. Sirius couldn't help but chuckle when Harry and Cepheus bought each other Quidditch memorabilia from their favorite teams.
While Sirius packed away the Christmas crackers to take to the Burrow, since he had not been trusted to bring any food, the boys gathered their gifts for the Weasley family. Cepheus appeared rather quickly, a small bag of gifts in his hand. Harry was nowhere to be found. The minutes dragged on and on. Sirius couldn't help but frown. What in Merlin's name was his godson doing upstairs? Had he bought out a bloody store to give to the Weasleys?
Sirius glanced down at his watch on his right wrist, a sigh escaping his lips. They were officially late for Christmas at the Burrow. He turned his head to Cepheus who fidgeted next to him, his eyes staring anxiously at the staircase. Sirius craned his neck, trying to listen for any indication that Harry was on his way but found none.
"Go find him," Sirius said, waving at the staircase.
Cepheus rushed upstairs without any further prompting. Rolling his head back, he stared at the ceiling. Finally, footsteps sounded and the two teenagers appeared on the stairs. Harry looked sheepishly at Sirius, his cheeks flushed a bright red.
"Sorry," Harry mumbled.
"What on earth were you doing?" Sirius asked.
"Err… well, I was… you see Ginny makes these homemade cards and I thought I'd make her one and, well, it was sort of stupid," Harry explained, wincing.
"He was on the mirror with Andy asking her what rhymes with gold," Cepheus teased.
Harry looked like he wanted to melt into the floor. Sirius was only painfully reminded of James. James never cared if his little poems and notes were corny. He had an overabundance of confidence that he was a bloody Casanova. Sirius always thought he was a moron. He didn't understand why Lily had been wooed by James' piss poor poetry.
"Right, let's go," Sirius said, gesturing for the boys to follow him outside to the Apparition point. "Keep close to me. You know the drill by now."
Sirius thought they must have looked like a sight to be seen. Three wizards casually walking down a snowy lane in their matching leather jackets. Anyone from the outside looking in would think Sirius was both of their fathers. They all certainly looked the part with their dark hair and tall stature.
When they arrived at the Burrow, Sirius led the boys around the back of the house to enter through the kitchen. Molly was at the counter finishing up some dessert. She dropped everything when she noticed them. Wiping her hands on her apron as she strolled over with a warm smile.
Sirius bent down, wrapping his arms around Molly and kissing her on the cheek. "Sorry, we're late. Harry had a momentary panic that his gift for Ginny wasn't good enough."
Molly laughed, turning towards Harry to pull him into a deep hug.
Harry scowled over at Sirius. "That's not true."
Sirius grinned. "Sorry, correction. He was worried the little poem in his card wasn't romantic enough so he called Andy on the mirror to help him perfect it."
"Oh, Harry, dear, aren't you wonderful?" Molly said, pulling back and cupping Harry's face.
Despite Harry's irritation at Sirius, he managed a gracious smile directed towards Molly. The kid's manners never ceased to amaze Sirius.
Molly turned towards Cepheus. "Hello, dear, I'm Molly Weasley, Ginny and Ron's mum," she explained, beaming. "It's so good to have you here. Sirius has told us so much about you."
Cepheus, as polite as Harry, smiled. "Thank you, Mrs Weasley."
"Well, Ginny and Ron are in the other room, dears," Molly said, waving towards the parlor.
Harry glanced at Sirius briefly before he took his bag of gifts and dashed into the other room with Cepheus. Sirius sat his own bag down on the kitchen table before he rifled through it. He pulled out his gift for Molly and handed it over.
"Happy Christmas," Sirius said with a smile.
"Oh, dear, your gift is under the tree," she explained. "Let me go grab it."
"Nah," Sirius replied, waving his hand. "I'll get it in a few. Open yours first."
Molly did. She pulled out the black velvet box and opened it, a gasp escaping her lips. Sirius watched her face carefully. Andromeda had said Molly would love it, but Sirius worried it was too intimate a gift.
"Oh, Sirius, it's beautiful!" Molly exclaimed as she pulled the bracelet from the box.
It had all the kids' birthstones on it, even Percy's because Sirius thought it gauche if he hadn't included it. If there was one thing Molly Weasley cared most about, it was her family. Molly fastened the bracelet on her wrist before she pulled Sirius down into a bone-crushing hug.
"I suddenly don't think my jumper with your initial is good enough," Molly said in a watery tone.
Sirius chuckled, holding Molly tight. "Honestly, it's the perfect gift. I love a good homemade jumper, something money can't buy. I'll even switch jumpers right now, if you want."
Molly laughed, pulling away from Sirius. She told him to go find his gift. She apparently made matching jumpers for Harry and Cepheus so she shooed him away to find the presents for the boys. Sirius laughed as he let Molly finish up the last of the meal.
Sirius walked into the parlor and froze. The last person he expected to see at the Burrow today was Marlene. She was talking to a stocky redhead with a wide grin on her face. Her hand touched his arm in an intimate familiar way. Sirius narrowed his eyes at the bloke. Sirius certainly didn't recognize him, but by the resemblance, knew he must be a Weasley.
"Oi, Sirius, mate, happy Christmas," George greeted with a thump on the back.
"Glad you could make it," Fred said, stepping up on the other side of him. "Ginny and Ron kept fretting Harry wouldn't make it."
"Funnily enough, they didn't ask about you," George teased.
"But we did," Fred assured him. "We were ready to send out a search party and everything."
Sirius gestured his chin towards Marlene. "Who's the redhead? Another Weasley, I presume?"
"That's Charlie," George replied.
"Charlie? Charlie, the dragon tamer?" Sirius asked, his brows furrowing.
"Well, yeah, but we don't call him that," Fred explained. "He's just Charlie to us."
"He came for Christmas," George explained. "He's presenting some big research project to the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures in January. So, he decided to make a big trip of it. You know, catch up on some Order stuff on the side while he's here."
"Right," Sirius said in a flat tone.
Marlene laughed, her body leaning into Charlie. Charlie smirked at her.
"He's getting on well with Marlene," Sirius observed.
George nodded. "Yeah, I guess she met him a few days ago through Hagrid. She offered to help him with some Healing terminology for his presentation."
Healing terminology. Yeah fucking right.
"Sounds as thrilling as Dad and Bill talking about goblin politics," Fred added.
Sirius grunted but didn't say anything. Marlene stepped away from Charlie, making her way towards the group of teenagers who had just finished opening up their gifts to each other. Marlene greeted Harry with a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek. When she pulled back, she also greeted Cepheus in a similar manner. Sirius held his breath she interacted with his boys.
Marlene had a gift for each of them. Sirius appreciated that she didn't leave Cepheus out. Then again, no one had. Everyone had been thoughtful enough to remember Cepheus. Sirius' eyes flickered away from them to see Charlie talking with Bill and Fleur.
Sirius tried to put Marlene out of his mind. Molly was probably only thinking of Harry, wanting him to have both his godparents with him on Christmas. Sirius would have liked a fucking warning though. Especially after he tried kissing her less than a week ago. Honestly, Sirius counted his lucky stars Molly hadn't invited Tegan and Demelza. Now that would have been extremely awkward.
Marlene pulled away from the boys, giving them both one last embrace and a kiss on the cheek. It took Sirius a few moments to realize that Marlene was heading his way. He had the sudden urge to bolt but his heart stubbornly rooted his feet in place.
"Hey," Marlene greeted him, a timid smile crossing her lips.
"Hey," Sirius replied, unsure of how to exactly approach Marlene after their spat in Surrey.
Marlene licked her bottom lip, gazing up at him. "I'm sorry," she said, causing Sirius to furrow his brow. "I shouldn't have said being friends was wrong. We need to try. For Harry."
Sirius felt a lump form in his throat. "For Harry. Right."
Marlene reached into her pocket and pulled out a miniature gift. With a tap of her wand, it grew in size. She held it out for him to take.
"Happy Christmas, Sirius," Marlene said. "I bought it before our little tiff the other day. And, well, I wanted you to have it still."
Sirius didn't take the gift, his eyebrows raising. "I didn't buy you anything."
Marlene shrugged, gesturing towards the gift. "It's fine. I'm not offended. Will you please take my gift?"
Sirius blinked and plucked the gift from her hands. His thumb brushed along the shiny red and gold paper.
"I'm sorry too," Sirius croaked, his eyes piercing into hers. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I just… for a moment…I forgot we weren't together. I wish I could say it was Azkaban's fault or my mind is still fuzzy from the potions, but I can't lie to you. I'm just a shit person."
Marlene's brows tugged down. "You're not a shit person, Sirius. I think that we're both navigating a… a really odd situation. We're doing the best we can."
"About Tegan–"
"No!" Marlene interrupted, her hands shooting up to stop him. "Let's not. Not here, not now, all right? It's Christmas. Just open your gift."
Sirius held his breath. He wanted to tell her that he decided to break things off with Tegan. Right after the holiday, because, he realized that as much as he liked her, he couldn't love her… not with Marlene back in his life. But instead of speaking he nodded and unwrapped her gift revealing a plain white box. Lifting the lid, he saw a coffee cup sitting inside. He pulled it out and chuckled as he read the words 'Godfather of the Fucking Year 1996' embossed on it.
"Turn it over," Marlene urged with an eager smile.
Sirius obliged. On the other side were the words 'Uncle of the Fucking Year 1996.' Sirius couldn't help but laugh, his gaze flickering up to Marlene. He'd kiss her if it hadn't gone so poorly the last time he attempted. Instead, he bent down and gathered her into his arms, their cheeks pressing together.
"Thank you," Sirius said in a thick voice, his hand pressing against the back of her head. "I fucking love it."
Marlene chuckled, burying her nose into his shoulder. The embrace didn't last as long as Sirius would have liked it to. Marlene pulled away first, her hand swiping under her eye.
"Friends?" Marlene whispered.
Sirius' heart ached. "Friends."
Marlene offered him a strained smile before stepping away. Sirius watched her go, crossing the room and stopping to talk to Fleur. Shoving his hands into his pockets, he looked around the room at the occupants. His gaze rested on Harry sitting with Ginny, Ron, and Cepheus. His godson stared at him, his brow furrowing beneath his glasses. Sirius offered him a tight smile before he made his way across the room to where Arthur, Ted, and Remus were talking.
Sirius didn't talk to Marlene throughout dinner or during the festivities afterward. He did annoyingly notice that she seemed to be spending quite a bit of time around Charlie Weasley. Sirius couldn't help roll his eyes. Charlie was half her bloody age. If Marlene was attempting to make Sirius jealous by dating some young bloke, she was ruddy succeeding. And Sirius knew he couldn't say a damn thing. It was pure torture.
Sirius tried to distract himself by listening to Dora recount the proposal story to Molly and Fleur despite already hearing it the previous night. He purposely steered clear of Andromeda, who shot him concerned looks as her gaze flickered between Sirius and Marlene. He didn't need her concerned meddling. If Marlene wanted to date some young fit bloke, she was entitled. Sirius had done nothing but be positively confusing with his intentions toward her.
As the night progressed, Sirius thought about how he really needed a fucking drink. Except, there was not a single drop of alcohol to be found in the entire bloody house. He cursed Molly and Andromeda for knowing him so ruddy well. His eyes roamed along the desserts on the counter and grabbed an oversized piece of fruitcake. Collapsing into one of the kitchen chairs, he tried to eat his fruitcake in fucking peace. But Sirius didn't have peace because as he aggressively stabbed the first mouthful, Molly wandered into the kitchen with a concern look on her face.
"Sirius! What are you doing?" Molly hissed, snatching the fruitcake from in front of him. "That has brandy in it!"
Sirius scowled. "I may know rubbish about cooking but even I know alcohol cooks out of food."
Molly huffed. "Not enough of it! Merlin, I don't know what Bill and Fleur were thinking bringing something like that. Do you feel all right?" she asked as she pitched the fruitcake into the bin before she took the rest of it and pitched that as well.
Sirius resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "I'm fine."
"Then why are you hiding out in here eating the one pudding you shouldn't be eating?" Molly challenged.
Sirius pressed his tongue against his teeth. "Why the fuck did you invite Marlene here?"
Molly froze. "Well, she has no family. And I thought Harry would want his godmother here. Aren't you two on good terms?"
Sirius leaned back in his chair, wishing he had kept his mouth shut and had his bloody fruitcake back. "Yes. No. I don't know."
Molly sank down into the chair opposite of Sirius. He hated to see her shoot him a pitying look.
"Sirius, dear, correct me if I'm wrong. But, the rumor is, you're dating Tegan Robins," Molly said in a cautious voice. "You two make it obvious enough during Order meetings."
Sirius gritted his teeth. "I don't know. It's more of a shag buddy thing," he explained, feeling like a git. "She's still in love with her dead husband. I'm…well, I'm me. We just fuck."
Molly's eyes softened. "Oh, dear, I think she may be starting to get over her dead husband. The way she looks at you…"
Sirius bowed his head, not wanting to talk about his love life. He rubbed his fingers against his forehead, trying to ease the headache that settled in long ago.
"Are you in love with both of them?" Molly whispered.
Sirius sighed. "No! I'm not in love with Tegan, anyway. I wish I were. It would be infinitely easier, but…" he trailed off, running both of his hands through his hair and gripping the too-long strands. "It doesn't matter. Your son has been flirting with Marlene all bloody evening."
"My son?" Molly whispered, her eyes growing wide. "Who?"
"Charlie," Sirius said, trying to keep the contempt out of his voice.
"He's too young! He's half her age!" Molly protested.
"I know!" Sirius agreed.
Molly huffed. "It's probably nothing. The age gap is far too wide to be decent."
"That's what I thought," Sirius agreed.
Molly leaned back in her chair, her arms crossing over her chest. She peered across the table at Sirius.
"We have a problem," Molly announced suddenly. "I must admit, I didn't come find you to talk about your love life and to throw away your fruitcake."
Sirius shut his eyes and took a deep breath. "What now?"
"Harry and Ginny disappeared from the parlor," Molly said, no amusement in her words. "Bill saw them sneaking upstairs. Alone. Hand in hand."
Sirius looked across the table at Molly. "You think they're what? Having sex upstairs?"
"I need you to go find out and tell them to get downstairs with everyone else!" Molly exclaimed.
"Why me?" Sirius demanded, not wanting to find his godson entangled with Ginny. "You can march upstairs yourself."
"You're his father!" Molly shrieked. "It's your job to pry them apart if they're alone behind closed doors."
Sirius' face pulled. "Yeah, you pulled that out of your fucking arse, Molly. That is not in my job description. The last thing I want to see is my godson's bare arse."
"You think I want to see my daughter like that?" Molly said in a hushed whisper. "Please, Sirius, just check on them. Tell them to stay downstairs with everyone else."
Sirius sighed, knowing it was a losing battle. Grumbling, he agreed. He hoped they were innocently snogging. The last thing he wanted to do on Christmas was to have another sex talk with Harry.
Easing up the stairs, Sirius held his breath. If they were naked, did he reprimand them? Did he give Harry the talk right away? What the bloody hell was he supposed to say? Sirius groaned when he noticed the bedroom door to Ginny's room was closed. He took a step towards the door when a familiar giggle made him stop dead in his tracks.
Sirius turned towards the bedroom next to Ginny's to see the door ajar. His gaze caught sight of Marlene in Charlie Weasley's strong arms. Her hands were pressed to either side of his face and her bottom lip caught secure between her teeth. Sirius stood frozen, watching as Charlie bent down and kissed her. Another giggle sounded.
"We can't. Not here," Marlene chastised.
Charlie grinned. "Let's go back to your place like before. We can both say our goodbyes separately and meet up."
"Charlie!" Marlene exclaimed.
"What?" Charlie asked with a smile, his body pressing against hers. "You don't like my cock anymore?"
Sirius stopped breathing. When Marlene had told him the other day that she slept with someone, he certainly didn't expect it to be a fucking Weasley son. He thought she had met some random bloke in a random bar and had a random spot of fun. Sirius sure as fuck didn't expect to actually meet the bloke.
"You're a menace," Marlene teased.
Charlie laughed. "What? I can't want a beautiful woman to play with my dragon?"
Marlene snorted, her head turning as her face scrunched up. Charlie pressed his lips to her neck. The playful smile fell from her face as she locked eyes with Sirius. He had no right to be jealous or upset or angry or feel anything really. Sirius knew that. But he couldn't help the white-hot rage that filled every single fiber of his being. He wanted to rip Charlie Weasley's dragon cock right off.
Charlie must have sensed her shift in mood because he pulled back and looked at her. His gaze followed hers as Charlie locked eyes with Sirius as well.
"Sirius…" Marlene said, taking a step away from Charlie.
Sirius' body snapped into action. He whipped around on his heels, making a beeline to the stairs. He took them two at a time, his heart beating harshly against his chest. He made his way into the kitchen where Molly and Andromeda were chatting as they cleaned some of the dishes.
"Did they come down?" Molly asked, turning towards him. "What were they doing?"
Sirius didn't respond. He hadn't even checked on Harry and Ginny. He just needed to get away. To leave the bloody house. It was suffocatingly hot inside the Burrow. Sirius needed some fresh air. He needed to breath. He needed to feel the chill on his skin so he could focus on anything other than the fact that Charlie fucking Weasley had his tongue down Marlene's fucking throat.
He shouldn't be upset. He couldn't be upset. Sirius had been the one pushing Marlene away as hard as he could. In fact, Sirius was shagging another woman on a weekly bloody basis and constantly had his tongue down Tegan's throat. Yet, he wanted to punch Charlie in his stupid face. He wanted to break his ruddy nose.
Pushing open the back door, Sirius immediately started to cool off. He hauled his jumper off and threw it into a mound of snow. His chest heaved, his body trembling. He couldn't tell if he was shaking due to the cold or something else.
"Sirius?" Andromeda called from behind him.
Sirius stiffened and didn't respond. He looked up at the night sky. His eyes glanced around at the stars, trying to spot Hydra. He found it, locating Alphard and letting out a long sigh of relief.
A hand pressed against his back. "Sirius, what's wrong?"
Sirius clenched his jaw. "It was too hot in there."
Andromeda rubbed his back. "Sirius, you're all flushed. What happened? What were Harry and Ginny doing? You didn't shout at him, did you? He's only sixteen. I do remember you at sixteen."
Sirius shook his head. "It's nothing to do with Harry. I didn't even see him."
The back of Andromeda's hand pressed against his cheek. "Sirius, it's only the two of us. Please, don't shut me out. I love you. You can talk to me. What happened?"
Sirius turned his head and looked down at Andromeda. "I saw Marlene kissing Charlie Weasley."
"Oh," Andromeda whispered. "Oh!"
"And I already know I have no right to be upset," Sirius added in a rush before Andromeda could tell him he was being a wanker. "I know I don't have a claim over her and I'm not dating her and I'm nothing to her. I even have a girlfriend or, or whatever we are. But I just… I don't know."
"Sirius, love, I don't think you're over Marlene," Andromeda explained.
Sirius' throat narrowed. He hated to admit Andromeda was right. But she was. He was still in deeply in love with Marlene. He had known it for a while now. Sirius wiped his wrist under his nose, the heat nearly gone from his body as the cold licked his skin. He didn't think he ever stopped loving Marlene. Tegan had been nothing more than a distraction. A distraction to make him feel anything except the suffocating numbness that had lingered after twelve years in Azkaban. He knew that, figured it out days ago. Sirius feared that realization came too late.
"Sirius, your skin is like ice," Andromeda commented. "Where's your jumper?"
Sirius gestured his chin towards the snow pile. "Over there. I threw it."
Andromeda sighed, marching over to the jumper and picking it up. She brushed the snow off it before she pulled her wand from her pocket. She cast a charm on it and then made her way back over to Sirius. Andromeda held the jumper out for him to grab.
"Thanks," Sirius commented as he accepted the jumper.
Andromeda searched Sirius' face as he pulled the jumper on over his head, which had a Warming Charm attached to it. "I don't understand how you can stand this level of cold sometimes."
Sirius shrugged. "It takes my mind off things. If I'm freezing my arse off, then I don't think about all the other shit going on."
"You better now?" Andromeda asked, crossing her arm over her chest.
"Yeah," Sirius replied, though he didn't think that was entirely the truth.
Andromeda wrapped an arm around him, her cheek pressing against his arm. "Sirius, you need to break it off with Tegan," she whispered. "Shag-buddy or not, you need to end it."
Sirius nodded, a lump forming in his throat.
"You're not over Marlene," Andromeda barreled on. "It makes sense you're not. You two never broke up. You two were torn apart unwillingly."
"I can't focus on Marlene right now," Sirius reasoned. "Or Tegan. Harry needs me–"
"Don't use Harry as an excuse to dismiss your problems," Andromeda snapped, catching his eye. "That's not fair to him or to you."
Sirius frowned. "I'm not… it's not like that."
"Marlene is his godmother," Andromeda reasoned. "She's already expressed to you that she wants to be highly involved in Harry's life, but she's not going to rip Harry away from you to gain that relationship. She's looking at you to be a mature adult and include her. Honestly, that alone makes Marlene a good person. She sees how attached Harry is to you and would never come between you two."
Sirius could only nod.
"And, honestly, Sirius, I love you," Andromeda said in a sad voice. "I love you so much. But I'm going to be completely honest with you. You are a git to Marlene. She needed you months ago, but you pushed her away. She was hurting and you were hurting. Instead of healing together, you thought suffering alone was better."
Sirius frowned. "It's not that simple."
"And why not? She's your soul mate, Sirius," Andromeda pressed, tears brimming in her eyes. "You were going to marry her. She's Harry's godmother. I understand what Bella did to her was, was unfathomable. But don't let her ruin your chance at true happiness. I love you so much and it hurts me to see you suffering so much."
Sirius knew Andromeda was right. Just like Molly had been right. And, embarrassingly enough, McGonagall. Sirius was tired of running. He was tired of pushing everyone away. He was so bloody exhausted dealing with the shitstorm of emotions that swirled inside of him. While therapy was helpful, he couldn't talk about the more pressing matters going on in his life without putting Harry's life in jeopardy.
There was only one person he wanted to talk to. Her name was Marlene McKinnon. And he fucking missed her more than he could even articulate.
I hope you enjoyed the latest chapter! Don't forget to drop a review. They motivate me to keep writing and inspire new ideas! There will be NO new chapter next week. I wish everyone a happy holidays and I'll be back on December 31 with hot girl Christmas part 2!
I need to give a huge shout out to my tumblr peeps who wanted Marlene to have a spot of fun. They were right. Sirius couldn't have all the fun. Another shout out for Marlene's Christmas gift to Sirius. I feel awful, but I can't remember who I was talking to about the coffee mug for Sirius. But it was definitely a joint effort!
Even bigger shout out to justalittleconfusing who was really the driving force behind hot girl Christmas and jealous Sirius. Even more so, thanks to her for editing. She was a special little guest editor this week! I feel truly blessed there are so many wonderful people who are willing to help me out with this story. You all mean the world to me!