A/N: This one has been a long time in the making, the writer's block is absolutely kicking my ass at the moment, but I've finally hit a breakthrough and I have a NEW CHAPTER FOR Y'ALL! Get the tissues ready!

What is it about JJ that makes her your favourite gymnast?

She's just STUNNING to watch. I mean, it probably helps that she's been blessed with the most amazing body, but she manages to make everything she does look elegant and easy. And even though she is TINY (like seriously, if you've never seen her in person or seen her standing next to something of average size, you can never fully grasp just how little she is), she has this amazing power and is capable of huge skills. She's also such a humble, sweet, down to earth girl despite all the tragedy she's experienced in her life, and every time I get to chat with her at meets is just a joy. So yeah, there's a lot of things I like about her, but she truly is an overwhelmingly beautiful gymnast to watch and has the personality to back it up.

Is JJ coming back?

Funnily enough, it looks like she is! She's on the roster to attend the June camp, where she should be able to verify to attend Nationals, because I did hear a whisper that she's not going to be at the US Classic this year. No-one has actually heard from her in a long time, so I don't know what her actual plans are, but at the very least, it looks like she's taking another run at worlds!

"Ok, this is your first full-out. I'm happy if you want to downgrade the tumbling a little bit, but try and do as much as you can so we know where we need to work more for nationals"

Nodding, JJ smiled at her coach, before stepping out onto the floor and assuming her starting pose. She watched as Teagan scrolled through her phone to select JJ's music, before pressing play on the stereo and turning the music up.

The Arena by Lindsey Stirling blared through the speakers, evoking drama and passion with every note. JJ waited for her cue, before swinging her arms through the opening moves and dancing her way back to the corner. Allowing her adrenaline to drive her forwards, she ran into her opening pass, flipping seamlessly across the floor and launching up into her double twisting double layout. When she hit the floor for the landing, it was a little low, but nothing that couldn't be fixed.

She allowed herself to get lost in the music, moving her way through the story of that afternoon in Rio, when all the emotions had come to a triumphant high and pushed her to the top of the podium.

By the time she was lining up for her last pass, it was building in her chest. This moment was symbolic of the moment she had landed her last pass in the all-around. She forced her mind to focus on the tumbling, landing an easy full twisting double tuck before leaping into a split jump. She danced out to the middle of the floor, freezing in her final pose before pumping her fist in the air twice with the last beats of the song, closing it out with the moment she had become the Olympic Champion. And then it was over, and she was standing there, her fist raised triumphantly in the air, but the tears rising ever so quickly as she relived everything that she had pushed down once more. Relaxing down, she leaned over, resting her hands on her knees and trying to catch her breath as the first few tears came.

"JJ? You ok?"

Straightening up, she nodded, even as she bit her lip to try and stem the tears. "Yeah, I… I've just never really thought about Rio, since we were there. And I've never thought about the all-around… I didn't think it would be so emotional to go back," she said tearfully, walking slowly towards Nick. He smiled as she approached, reaching out and dropping an arm around her shoulders.

"It's ok. I think, for what it's worth, that that just proves it's a story worth telling," he said gently. "But if you don't want to do this routine, you don't have to"

"Championships are less than three months away Nick, we couldn't get a new routine even if I wanted to"

"You could do last year's-"

JJ vehemently shook her head. "No. I'm not doing that one again. The last time I did was in the all-around final, I… no"

"Ok"

"It's fine," JJ said softly, smiling as she wiped her cheeks. "It's just the first time doing it full-out. I'll be ok. I want to do it"

Nick nodded. "Alright. Well, I think we're done for the morning, so you can go on and head home. I'll see you this afternoon"

Alone in an empty house, Sandy was in a world of her own as she relaxed on the sofa in the front room with a book in hand. Outside, the cold weather of winter had given way to spring thunderstorms, rain pelting down from a blackened sky as lightning flashed through the window. Yet, despite the intensity outside, she felt warm and cosy inside on the couch. It had been a good morning. She and JJ had both risen early and enjoyed breakfast together before JJ left for training, and once she was alone, Sandy had taken some time to relax with her book and a fresh cup of coffee. Before she knew it, she had whiled away hours in another world, completely lost in the story before her.

A knock at the front door pulled her from the pages, making her frown as she set the book aside and slowly pulled herself from the couch. JJ wasn't due back for roughly another hour, and she wasn't expecting anyone else to drop by. So when she pulled open the door and found Will on the porch, she was a little surprised.

"Hi Will," she said, giving the young man a warm smile. "JJ's not here, she's got training this morning"

"That's ok, I... I actually came to talk to you... if that's ok?" Will said softly. Sandy nodded, immediately beckoning him in out of the weather.

"What's going on?" Sandy asked gently as she closed the front door behind him and swiftly guided him into the kitchen. "Is everything ok?"

"I... I just had therapy, and... my therapist wanted me to talk with you. I thought it would be best if I just came straight over because... it's not exactly goin' to be an overwhelmin'ly happy conversation," Will said thickly, sidling up onto a counter stool as Sandy automatically began fixing cups of coffee.

"Ok. What does she want us to talk about?"

Will took a deep breath. "The day JJ... the day she tried to kill herself"

Sandy froze for a moment, steeling her focus on the mug she was sliding beneath the coffee machine. With all the strides JJ had taken, it was easy to forget that that awful day had only happened less than three months ago. Driven by nothing more than the urge to help her daughter navigate through the grief that was trying to kill her, Sandy had pushed aside every feeling of sadness in the aftermath. And now, clearly Will was trying to overcome a few more hurdles on his journey... but Sandy wasn't sure if she had the emotional strength to help him do so.

"I... I know I seemed so distant afterwards. More than I was before. Like I didn't care and I didn't want anythin' to do with JJ at the time, but... I was so terrified of losin' her altogether... and I just... I thought it would be easier if I distanced myself from everythin'. I was tryin' to protect myself," Will said thickly. "And part of me feels like you... you resent me a little for the way I treated JJ when things were at their worst"

Sandy let out a heavy sigh, lifting the mug of coffee and carrying it over to where Will was sitting. "Will, I'm not upset with you. Really, I'm not," she said softly, sliding the mug in front of him and following it with the sugar bowl. "This year's been hard. And as much as I love my daughter, I know that she was the cause of so much of your pain. Sadly, she's been the cause of a lot of mine as well, so… I completely understand wanting to distance yourself from JJ and everything that happened, because... I wanted to do the same thing"

"The reason I went to New Orleans wasn't because I wanted to end things with JJ," Will said quietly, his eyes filling with tears. "I truly never stopped loving her, despite what I told her. The reason I left was because I couldn't handle bein' in this city if she did it again and was successful. I didn't want to see that obituary in the news, see her name on a gravestone in this town... I just couldn't do it. I was so scared she would try it again, and the only way I felt I could protect myself was to get as far away from her as possible"

Sandy looked at him as the tears began to spill down his cheeks, her hands clutching her own mug of coffee as she tried to keep her composure. "I know. I wanted to do the same thing. But I couldn't because she and I are all we have left in this city. I just shut myself down. It was almost like I went into autopilot and all I could do was fight every single day to keep her here with me. I just couldn't fathom the possibility of losing another child to suicide. There was no way I was letting that happen"

Will shook his head in disbelief, sniffing back tears and wiping his cheeks with the sleeve of his hoodie. "I don't know how you've kept it together. I really don't. That night… when you called me sayin' you were scared JJ was gonna do somethin' stupid… I don't think I've felt fear like that before. It was like my blood ran cold. But you… you were so calm. I just… given everythin' that happened with Ros, I don't know how you kept it together as well as you did. I had her pinned down to the floor, tryin' to stop the bleedin', and she's cryin' and cryin' and beggin' me to let her go, sayin' nobody wants her, nobody loves her… it felt like my heart was being ripped to pieces. I could barely keep it together long enough to keep her alive and yet… you were calm enough to call the ambulance"

"I knew JJ needed me," Sandy said softly. "I knew you were there… even though I had no idea if you had gotten to her in time, part of me knew she was safe, if only because she was with you. And when I knew she was ok… I just knew I had to be strong enough for the both of us until she was ready to be strong for herself. I couldn't save Ros. But I still had a chance to save JJ, and I sure as hell wasn't going to screw that up"

As she finished speaking, she realised the tears had been flooding silently down her cheeks, leaving tear stains against her pale skin. "When I saw the two of you on her bathroom floor, blood all over the place, JJ crying that she didn't want to be saved… I didn't recognise her. I didn't recognise the girl who stood on top of that podium in Brazil, the girl who loves so fiercely and knows loyalty like no other. In that moment, I felt like I had already lost my girl, and I didn't know what to do to help her back to us"

"She's come a long way in such a short time," Will said softly, his face softening into a watery smile. "I'm really proud of her"

"Me too," Sandy replied, sniffing back tears as she reached across and squeezed Will's hand. "But I'm proud of you too Will. You've both fought through the shit to be where you are today. And I think going forward, you'll both be so much stronger for it"

"How about you?" Will asked gently. "I mean, yeah, a lot has happened, but… you still have grief to deal with as well. I honestly don't know how you've managed"

Sandy shrugged, giving the younger man a small smile. "One day at a time, I guess… I miss Michael so much. There are so many things that would be so much easier if he was here. But I also know he wouldn't want us to be sad every day. He'd want us to make the most of what we have and enjoy every minute." She paused, taking a deep breath, before flicking her eyes up towards Will. "Which is why I'm trying to reconcile that with the fact that I've met someone at the grief group I've joined"

Will broke into a surprised smile, before letting out a chuckle. "I'm guessin' you haven't told JJ yet"

Sandy grinned, shaking her head. "No, no, I haven't. I'm not really sure how she's going to react. Not that it's serious or anything, and I definitely didn't expect to have anything like this happening so soon after losing Michael. It's just… he's lovely. He makes my world feel a little more calm, and I look forward to it whenever we catch up. I don't want anything to be rushed, but… I think having him around is good for me"

"What's his name?"

"Paul," Sandy said, a soft smile spreading across her face.

The sound of the front door opening tore both of them from their conversation. There was the clatter of keys hitting the dish, at the same time the door clicked closed, followed by the thud of a heavy bag hitting the floor. Soft footsteps drew closer, until JJ's weary frame appeared in the doorway.

"Hey, you're home early," Sandy said cheerily, brightening her smile in an effort to hide the fact that she had been crying.

"Yeah, we finished up sooner than we thought… are you guys ok? You look like you've been crying," JJ replied with a frown.

Sandy let out a heavy sigh, glancing over at Will before looking back at her daughter. "Will and I have been talking… about the day you… you know"

JJ's face fell, her entire body immediately tensing up. Sandy could see straightaway that she was building up walls, wanting to forever protect herself from any hurt that could possibly come her way.

"I'm gonna go have a shower," JJ said softly after a tense silence, starting to turn back towards the stairs.

Sandy rose from where she had taken residence on one of the counter stools. "Just wait a minute-"

"I don't want to talk about it," JJ said defiantly, avoiding looking at anyone as she tried to hurry back out of the room.

"JJ, you need to!" Sandy said firmly, reaching out and grabbing JJ's wrist to stop her in her tracks. Slowly, she turned JJ's hand over, bringing the darkened scar from that awful day in March into the light. As she took it in, her eyes welled with tears again. "We almost lost you. And... despite the experiences you've had, I don't think you truly understand what that was like for the two of us"

"I know what it was like!" JJ insisted, her eyes filling with tears as she wrenched her hand from her mom's. "I know what that was like because I found Ros-"

"That's not the same," Will cut in, getting to his feet.

"How would you fucking know, you weren't there when she died," JJ spat as she whirled around to look at Will.

"Neither were you," Sandy reminded JJ softly. A heavy silence fell over the three of them before Sandy reached out and took JJ's hands, not missing how her daughter's shoulders sagged with defeat, the tears beginning to spill silently down her cheeks. "I know you found Ros… god, that's not a day I think I'm ever going to forget. But when you found her, she was already gone. There was nothing you could do. We had no idea she was planning what she did. And sadly, it's just what happened, and there's nothing we can do to change it. But with you… I knew. I could hear it in your voice when I got off the phone, and deep in my gut, I knew what you were going to do. Will and I knew we still had a chance to save you, but we didn't know if we would stop you in time. And that was the most terrifying moment I think I've ever lived, JJ. When we found Ros, she was already gone, and all I felt was overwhelming sadness, and grief, but with you… I had to confront the terrifying possibility of losing you as well, while simultaneously fighting to keep you alive. I have never felt fear like that in my life, JJ, and I never, ever, want to feel it again"

Breaking down in tears, JJ collapsed into the nearest chair, Will and Sandy slowly following to sit either side of her. She balled up her hands into the sleeves of her hoodie, covering her face as she tried to keep herself from completely falling apart.

"I'm so sorry," she sobbed, her voice muffled by her hands. "I never… wanted to do that to you. I wasn't thinking straight, I… I-I just reacted"

"I know," Sandy said, her voice quiet and soothing as she gave JJ's hand a squeeze. "And we're not telling you this to make you feel bad or guilty for what happened, because we don't live in your head and I don't think we could ever understand being in such a dark place. We just want you to understand that there's a lot of healing still to come for us as well"

JJ sniffed, nodding as Will shuffled closer and dropped an arm around her shoulders.

"You know, you scared the hell outta me that day… but you also made me realize just how much I love you. So much that the thought of stayin' here and watchin' you try it again and be successful… I couldn't face it, Jayje. I had to leave. I needed space. But I needed that space because I loved you so much… not because I didn't love you anymore," he said gently, pressing a kiss to her temple as she leaned into his touch.

"I know what I did was selfish," JJ said softly, tears dripping down onto Will's shirt. "But I never even thought about how it affected you. And I'm sorry"

"We don't want you to apologise," Sandy cut in gently, resting a hand on JJ's knee. "We just want you to keep pushing forward, making progress the way you have been. Because you're doing so well, and we are so proud of you… and I don't know about Will, but seeing you smiling again is doing more than I ever could have known to help me heal as well"

Eyes blurred with tears, JJ straightened up, giving her mom a weak smile as she placed a hand on top of the one on her knee. Sandy smiled sadly, lifting her other hand to brush the loose strands of JJ's hair back from her face. "What happened to my bright little ten year old?"

JJ let out a choked sob. "She's still here. She's just been through some shit"

Sandy chuckled, sliding an arm around JJ's back and pulling her towards her, pressing a loving kiss to the top of her head. "I love you, JJ. So, so much. Please don't ever forget that"

"I know," JJ said quietly. "I love you too"