Morning.

Light streamed into the common room, and Remus blinked a couple of times. "I wonder if Prongs is still reading that textbook," he mumbled.

Peter groaned. "I hope not."

"Where's Padfoot?"

"I think he went to breakfast, like, an hour ago. You know he wakes up early."

"Ah. What time is it?"

"Defense Against the Dark Arts starts in an hour."

Remus groaned and forced himself to sit up. Students walked through the common room, laughing and talking with their friends, and here Remus was, in pajamas and recently asleep on the floor. He supposed he should feel embarrassed, but he didn't have the presence of mind to do so. What bothered him more was that Manard would probably jump at the opportunity to give him a detention if he was late to class, and Remus' last detention with Manard had been somewhat less than pleasant.

"We should get going," he said.

"Yeah," said Peter. He helped Remus up wordlessly (a fact for which Remus was extremely thankful, because his bones always hurt more in the morning), and they walked to the dormitory to get dressed…

…and sure enough, there was James, slumped over the textbook. Kyle was on his head, clinging to his hair, also snoozing. James' spectacles were still on. "He definitely stayed up all night," said Remus.

Peter grimaced. "Yep."

"Should we wake him up?"

"I say we let him sleep. We can take notes for him, right?"

"Right," said Remus. Just as he was rummaging through his trunk to find clean socks, though, James shot straight up, nearly catapulting Kyle off of his head.

"Erp!" cried Kyle.

"Ow!" cried James, and his voice cracked horribly. "Kyle, you're pulling my hair!"

"Erp," said Kyle. Judging by the weak yet horrified sounds coming from James' mouth, he was still pulling.

"I'll get him," said Remus tiredly. Carefully, he untangled Kyle's claws from James' hair and cradled him like a baby. "Get changed, Prongs. You smell. Are you going to class?"

"Yes," whispered James. "I think I've lost my voice, though."

"Not surprised." Remus looked at Kyle, who was currently trying to nuzzle into Remus' neck. "Look, I think he likes me."

"Of course he likes you," rasped James. "Better than me, probably. He didn't sleep last night at all."

"You probably shouldn't go to class. Say you're ill. Everyone will believe it."

"It's a matter of principle, Moony." James started changing into his robes, face set in determination. "I'm a dad now, and sometimes dads have to do things they don't want to do. I have to get a good job someday so that I can support Kyle. How can I do that if I don't go to class?"

"How can you do that if you never sleep?"

"Rubbish. You skip a full night's sleep every month and you're fine."

"I recover for at least two full days in the Hospital Wing afterwards."

"I've pulled all-nighters before, Moony."

"Not while reading to a goblin all night!"

Kyle nuzzled closer to Remus, and Remus was suddenly overcome by an inexplicable sadness. Was he starting to love Kyle? Was he sad that they would have to give him up someday (because surely James could not do this forever).

No, Remus was sad for another reason, and it took him until James was finished changing to put his finger on it. Remus was sad because it was such a strange and interesting feeling, having a small thing completely and totally depend on him. The trust that Kyle showed toward Remus was unmatched, and the expression in his oversized, bulbous eyes was brand-new. This baby goblin saw Remus as a parent, essentially, and Remus was enjoying it.

Someday, James would have the option to be a parent—a real one, of a human child. Sirius would have the option as well, and so would Peter. But Remus—Remus would never, ever have that choice, for multiple reasons. First, he would never dare to be in a relationship, because tethering someone else to his doomed, miserable life was simply cruel. Second, he would never risk passing his lycanthropy to an innocent child, thereby potentially murdering both the mother and the child.

There was always adoption, but Remus was certain that he would never make enough money to support both himself and a child. And besides, even if he did (by some miracle), the child would still be at risk of hatred and ostracization if it were tied to a werewolf parent. No—Remus had grown up like that, and he would not do that to a child.

Remus was only fourteen, so there was really no point in thinking about such things right now… and, to be quite honest, Remus had no particular urge to be a father. He could hardly take care of himself, after all, and the anxiety that fatherhood was sure to introduce into his life was unnecessary. He wouldn't add that stress on top of the stress of lycanthropy. Yet as he stood here, looking into Kyle's trusting eyes, feeling Kyle's tiny arms around his neck, observing the warmth of Kyle's skin against his own and smelling James' shampoo on the creature's skin… Remus felt, as he did every day about various things, that lycanthropy had stolen something from him.

He despised that feeling.

He handed Kyle back to James as soon as James was finished changing, and then he began to change into his own robes. "You've got to get rid of Kyle, Prongs," said Remus. He still wasn't saying no, but now his refusal to speak the forbidden word was possibly for a totally different reason.

James made sure to lock Kyle up tightly before leaving for Defense Against the Dark Arts. He put him in the bathroom with a blanket, a pillow, and a couple of things to play with, and then the three Marauders set out to go to Defense.

"Have you eaten breakfast?" James asked Remus.

"No. Didn't have time."

James frowned. "You need to eat."

"And you need to stop talking, because your voice sounds terrible." Remus lowered his voice. "You're lucky I have enhanced hearing; otherwise, I probably wouldn't even be able to make it out."

"Can confirm," said Peter. "It sounds like the faintest, quietest breaths of a flea."

James' frowned deepened, and Remus sighed. "Tell you what, Prongs. After Defense Against the Dark Arts, we'll go to the Kitchens. I'll eat brunch, and I'll also make you some tea with honey. Mum makes it for me sometimes after rough full moons, and it really helps heal my voice from howling all night long. Then I'll take you to Madam Pomfrey, and you can say you lost your voice at the Quidditch match."

James brightened. "Thanks," he rasped.

"Anything for you," sighed Remus, and then they stepped into the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.

And, to Remus' great surprise, nobody was there but Professor Manard. "What's going on?" whispered James. "I thought we were on time. Are we actually early? Do we have time to eat breakfast after all?"

Manard swiveled around in his chair, grinning. "Ah, James! Remus! Peter! So good to see you. Class has actually been canceled today… well, for you, James and Peter. I'd like to talk to Remus alone for a moment."

"What?" said all three Marauders at the same time—well, James tried to say it, but he didn't have much of a voice left.

"That's right," said Manard, smiling. "There's been a small development, and I need Remus' help. It's not a big deal. You'll have him back before you know it."

"But he was going to make me tea," said James.

Manard frowned. "Oh, yes, your voice does sound bad. I would visit Madam Pomfrey if I were you. Chop-chop. Remus will find you when I'm done with him."

James gave Remus a suspicious look and then ambled away, followed closely by Peter. Remus watched them go, certain that James was heading back to the dormitory to check on Kyle instead of to the Hospital Wing.

"Have a seat in my office, Remus," said Manard. "I'm just going to wait here until the rest of the students come in. Once I've cleared them all out, then I'll meet you in there."

Shaking slightly, Remus entered Manard's office and took a seat on the mahogany chair. He watched the silver bird on Manard's desk—dipping forward and backward, forward… and… backward…

Minutes passed, and they felt like the longest minutes of Remus' life. He twisted around in his seat and glanced at the bookshelves. They were filled to the brim with werewolf books, and none of them were empathetic nor optimistic… Why the Werewolf Deserves to Die… Werewolves: Monsters or Beasts?… Dangers in Disguise… A Case for Mass Werewolf Execution... Disgusted, Remus looked away. He didn't want to stare at these titles for any longer.

Or did he?

To be quite honest, Remus was curious about what could possibly be in those books. What arguments would the authors make? Would there be anything legitimate? Would Alexander Adamson debunk any of them in his upcoming talk? Remus reached for Dangers in Disguise, every finger quivering in anticipation… and then he saw something else directly next to it.

It was a photo album.

Not just any album, but one that had been well-worn and well-used. The color was faded, there were rips and fingerprints, and it smelled strongly of Manard, meaning he'd handled it recently. Remus couldn't help but be curious. Was it photos of his late wife, perhaps? His family? What did a monster's family look like, Remus wondered?

In one quick, terrified movement, he grabbed the album and opened it up on his lap.

Fenrir Greyback stared back at him from the pages.

"Fiddlesticks," Remus muttered, jumping back in his chair. He slammed the book shut, and then slowly opened it again, staring back into those monstrous eyes with somethign that resembled defiance. He was a Gryffindor, after all.

Once his heart calmed its erratic beating, he continued to flip through the book—there was a photo of Greyback, taken at night with some serious flash… there was a photo of Greyback baring his teeth… a few clippings from the Prophet… and then, before Remus' very eyes, lay the exact clipping from the Prophet that Remus had pored over a little less than two years prior.

Notorious werewolf Fenrir Greyback has been seen prowling near Thimble Woods. Residents are advised to stay indoors and take precautions during the next full moon (May 17). Any sightings should be reported to a Ministry official immediately.

Not even two years ago, Remus had seen that very article in the Prophet while home alone. Not even two years ago, he had walked across the hill to his former professor's house, shaking and sweating, terrified of what might happen. Not even two years ago, he'd fallen into a state of panic, unable to breathe, so deeply afraid of Fenrir Greyback that he could hardly function.

Remus was already a werewolf, so he had less reason to be afraid of Fenrir Greyback as some others did—but because of past events, he knew what the man was capable of, and his mind went into a near-animalistic state of terror whenever he so much as thought of him. Remus stared at the clipping for a bit, but then he heard footsteps. Terrified, he slammed the album shut once more and stuffed it back onto the shelf.

Unfortunately, he wasn't fast enough. "What have you been reading?" asked Manard as he walked through the doorway. "Oh, I see. You needn't put it back, you know. You're allowed to look at it."

"I don't really want to," said Remus stiffly.

"Why don't I show you some of the finer points?" Manard shut the door behind him, and then he reached over Remus and grabbed the book. "See, after Greyback murdered my wife, I resolved that I would someday catch him and put him to death. So I put any Greyback-related item I see in here. I have newspaper clippings dating back years, even from years before Greyback killed my wife. Isn't that interesting?"

"Professor, I really don't want to hear about Fenrir Greyback right now."

"Well, that's too bad, because he is exactly the reason I wanted to see you alone today."

"What? Why?"

Manard smiled and started flipping through the album. Remus waited, becoming more nervous as time went by. "Ah," said Manard, "here it is. Look."

He handed the album to Remus, who hesitantly took it. It was a small article—only a few sentences; hardly front page news—but Remus recognized it immediately. Fenrir Greyback spotted in Cardiff.

"Remus, this article wasn't written anywhere near the full moon," said Manard softly. "But you would have still lived in Cardiff back then. I read your file—I know all about where you lived and when. Seems odd, doesn't it, that Greyback would return to the scene of the crime, only a little while after he bit you? It's strange, isn't it… especially considering he's been known to visit children after biting them? A little coincidental, perhaps?"

"I won't confirm that Greyback was the one who bit me."

"Of course you won't. But can you at least confirm… that you've come across him in human form, Remus? Just once? After he bit y—I mean, after you were bitten?"

"I… why?"

"I've been thinking, that's all. Werewolves are excellent trackers, you know. You have a wonderful sense of smell, and Greyback's probably looking for you anyway… I can't find him, but I think you could."

Remus felt his face drain of color. "You're asking me to help you find him."

"Of course I am. I hate him, you hate him. Why shouldn't we work together?"

"Because you hate me, too."

"True. I also hate some of my coworkers. There's this girl named Wilma Harrington who works at the Ministry with me, for example—what an annoying woman. But we work together nonetheless, and we haven't killed each other yet."

Remus inhaled. "I'm sorry, Professor. I don't particularly want to work with you, and I don't particularly want to search for Greyback. I'd be putting my safety on the line, and you're… well, let's just say that you haven't yet convinced me to risk my life for you."

"He'd never kill you. You're just like him."

"I'm not!" Remus reflexively closed his fingers together, unable to help himself. "I am not just like him! I am my own person, and I am perfectly capable of… of being good and kind and… and of saying no to you. No. I won't help."

Remus had finally done it. He hadn't been able to say no to his friends—not about the Animagi, not about Kyle, not about anything, really—but he would say no to this, because Remus was not about to risk his life for Salvis Manard. He would risk everything for his friends, even his own sanity, but he would not risk anything for Manard—not more than he had to, anyway.

"Fine," said Manard. "You really are just like him, aren't you? You'd let hundreds of people die for your own benefit. He'll find victims in the future, and their blood will be on your hands—you, a werewolf with incredible tracking abilities, a werewolf who knows Greyback's scent and appearance, a werewolf whom he wants on his side immensely—you are harming those people."

Remus felt a little bit sick. "No," he said, "not me. Greyback. Greyback is harming those people."

"You're secretly trying to help him, hm? That's why you refuse you help me track him down… you wouldn't want harm to befall your master."

"What?" Remus stood up, horrified. "I'm sorry, Professor, but I'm leaving. You're… well, you're going a little too far."

He started to exit the room. Just as he was walking out the door, Manard called, "You'll change your mind, Remus Lupin, and I'll be waiting here for when you do."

"I won't change my mind," Remus grumbled to himself. "I've had enough of Greyback to last me a lifetime."

Sirius and Peter met Remus in the corridor almost immediately after he stepped out of Manard's classroom. "What happened?" demanded James in a weak rasp. "What did he want to speak with you about?"

Remus frowned. "Your voice is still terrible, Prongs. Did you see Madam Pomfrey like Professor Manard told you?"

"Of course not. When have I ever done anything an authority figure told me to do?"

Remus didn't know what to say to that. "Where's Peter and Kyle?"

"Peter's babysitting."

"I see."

"We just wanted to make sure you were okay. What did Manard want?"

"He had a question."

"What was the question?"

"Erm. He just… wanted to know what I thought about Alexander Adamson. Since he's speaking at Hogwarts soon and all that."

Remus internally cringed. He didn't like lying to his friends—not after he'd done it for all of first year—and he couldn't wait until Manard left at the end of the year. Indeed, Remus had never been so thankful for the curse.

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him I was excited, of course. You know how many times I've read Adamson's book and listened to his records. He's the best werewolf researcher there is."

"And… why was Manard asking you?"

"He was curious, Prongs. Wanted to know if I approved of Adamson, seeing as I'm sort of an expert on the subject. Stop being so annoyingly suspicious. You're so—"

Suddenly, without warning, Remus stumbled. James caught him with all the reflexes of a Keeper, crying, "Merlin's beard, Remus! Are you okay?"

"I… I think." Remus stood up, breathless, and then stumbled again and caught himself on James' shoulder. "I just… blimey. I don't feel well."

James wrapped an arm around Remus' shoulders, face set in determination. "I'm taking you to the Hospital Wing," he said.

"It's just regular aches and pains. I don't need to go to the… ouch." Remus grimaced, which he was sure wasn't a very attractive look on him. "Sorry."

"I'm taking you to the Hospital Wing. Padfoot, go back to the dormitory to check on Wormtail and Kyle."

Without waiting for a response, James starting helping Remus to the Hospital Wing, observing Remus' limp with horror. "It's all right, mate, we're almost there," he said soothingly.

"We'd better be. I feel like I'm going to collapse. And stop talking; you'll hurt your voice even more."

They arrived in the Hospital Wing, and James opened the door with such power that the slamming noise hurt Remus' ears. "What's going on?" said Madam Pomfrey, rushing to Remus' side. "Is everything all right?"

Remus shook both James and Madam Pomfrey off before standing up perfectly straight on both feet. "Yes," he said smugly. "Well, with me, at least. But James needs something to soothe his throat, and then he needs a very long nap. He stayed up all night."

James' mouth fell open. "Remus, you sneak! You lied?"

"It was the only way I could get you here." Remus smiled and patted James' hand as Madam Pomfrey led him to a bed in the back. "I'll see you later, Prongs. Sleep tight."

Most of the time, Remus did not like lying to his friends… but some kinds of lies, it turned out, felt pretty good.