Chapter Six: Swish
Letty was out of bed and dressed in a soft blue day dress before Elsie even entered Letty's bedroom. Her hair was pulled back and her makeup was perfect as she sat in the sitting room. It would be a few hours before her mother and father returned, so Helena decided to distract her.
"I should have brought a fan," Helena sighed, waving her hand at herself to provide a breeze.
"I have an extra," Letty laughed, pulling a plane white fan from her handbag, noticing the folded paper in the bag and remembering what it was.
She shook her head before passing the fan over, using her own blue one to fan herself.
"Attention everyone!" Colin called as Letty reached the spot beside Benedict.
"Oh, no," she groaned.
"What do you know?" Benedict questioned.
"Nothing good," she sighed.
"I would like to make a small but important announcement," Colin continued, looking around at everyone. "I have happy news to impart. I have asked Miss Marina Thompson to be my wife, and she has accepted."
The Featheringtons, bar Pen, seemed thrilled. Polite applause and smiles of congratulations were heard from others. The Bridgertons just stared, seeming rather confused. Benedict turned to Letty and she grabbed his drink from his hand, downing it in one go and passing the empty glass back before going to Pen.
"Are you alright?" Letty asked, voice soft.
"She doesn't deserve him," she whispered.
"Would you like to tell me why?" Letty questioned. "I may be able to help."
"She isn't a good person," Pen stated. "Her intentions are not pure."
Pen grew quiet, staring as Colin and Marina thanked those giving them congratulations. The Bridgertons were finally smiling, congratulating Colin and Marina, but Letty could see how forced it was. Stress was clear on their faces but they hid it well and Letty wanted to tell them how proud she was for their bravery. Not much else happened after that and Helena and Letty returned home quickly.
An hour before supper, a carriage pulled up in front of the house. Letty smiled as she and Helena stood in the front foyer as the door was opened. Lord and Lady Everly walked into the house. Her father went to his sister, giving her a kiss on the cheek and thanking her for watching over Letitia while they'd been away. Elizabeth walked slowly into the room, a blank expression on her face.
"Mother?" Letty asked, voice soft. "How are you?"
"You," her mother rolled her eyes before heading towards the stairs.
Letty felt her heart drop, wishing the mother who had left was the same one that was returning. Helena took Letty's hand, squeezing it gently.
"Charles, would you mind if I stayed for the remainder of the season?" Helena asked. "It seems Elizabeth may not be in the right mind to escort Letitia to and from events."
"Yes, I think that would be best," Letty's father nodded.
"Shall we sit for dinner?" Helena asked. "It should be ready soon. Should we call for Elizabeth to come back down?"
"Someone will take her a plate. Let us enjoy the night," Charles insisted. "Letitia, tell me about the season thus far?"
"I made friends with a prince," Letty smiled.
"How on Earth did you manage that?" her father questioned.
"By speaking German," Letty answered with a small laugh.
Letty informed her father of studying under Madame Delacroix for the past few weeks and of the compliments she'd received on her gowns in his absence.
"Is that something you wish to do?" her father questioned. "I'm sure there is some sort of schooling for it if you wish?"
"I would like that," Letty smiled softly.
Her father gave her a large smile before they began eating. At the end, Letty, Helena, and Charles all headed upstairs to get ready for bed. Letty bid Helena and her father good night before opening her bedroom door and freezing where she stood.
"No!" Letty yelled, rushing into her room.
"Letitia!" her father yelled, rushing into the room.
"Mama!" Letitia yelled, holding her mother in her arms and rocking her back and forth. "No!"
Her father rushed forward, taking her mother from her and feeling for breath.
"Call for a doctor!" Charles yelled, pulling Letitia into his arms and rocking her back and forth.
"Mama," Letitia was crying when Helena reached the room, staring at the mess around her.
The room was destroyed. Gowns had been ripped apart and fabric had been tossed out of the window or into the now lit fireplace, along with Letitia's sketchbook. Elizabeth's medicine jar was open and empty on the floor, Elizabeth having taken all of it before falling into a deep sleep that she would never wake from on her only daughter's floor.
The doctor arrived and Letitia was dragged from the room, screaming for her mother. Helena pulled Letitia to her, holding her close and rocking her back and forth. The Bridgertons and Featheringtons arrived at some point, Eloise and Penelope attempting to calm Letitia but having no luck. Benedict came forward then.
Benedict lifted Letitia into his arms as if she weighted nothing. He carried her to a sitting room, holding her in his arms as he sat on a couch.
"I've got you," he whispered softly. "I'm here. I've got you."
Letty began to calm at his words, her loud sobbing turning into whimpers as she clung to him, her hands wrapped in his shirt. Benedict held her through the night, just speaking softly until she fell asleep in his arms. Even then he did not release her, continuing to hold her as she slept to keep her nightmares away.
Anthony and Violet sat across from them in sitting chairs, eyes on the two of them until Violet fell asleep in her chair, neck at an angle that was sure to hurt in the morning. Anthony and Benedict locked eyes.
"She'll need us," Benedict whispered.
"She'll need you," Anthony corrected.
"She doesn't need me," Benedict shook his head.
"Then, maybe, you need her."
Benedict remained quiet after that, pulling Letty closer and just holding her. Anthony knew how deep his affections for Letty truly were. At the ball, Anthony was the one Benedict had fled to after realizing his feelings for Letty. Anthony had convinced him to go for it, Benedict being prepared to do just that until Letty had fled him. Benedict had been back and forth on how to handle his feelings ever since. He'd decided to take comfort in the arms of Madame Delacroix in the meantime. Nothing serious would come of it but he also knew it would hurt Letty if she found out, so he'd not told anyone, not even his brothers.
Benedict and Anthony watched as the sun came up, Violet slowly waking and rubbing at her neck. She looked forward, finding Benedict still holding Letty in his arms protectively and gave him a sad look. She stood, rubbing Benedict's shoulder before leaving the room, waving Anthony to follow along as Elsie entered the room, looking tired but dressed for the day.
"Time to wake up," Benedict whispered softly to Letty.
"No," Letty whined, burying her face further into Benedict's neck, her lips moving against his skin and causing him to shiver.
"Letty," Benedict tried again. "It's time to wake up. You need to get changed."
"Few more minutes," Letty complained, making herself more comfortable against Benedict.
Bendict held in a laugh, knowing Letty was still mostly asleep. He thought it was rather cute how she moved further into him, trying to hide against him. He wanted nothing more than to continue holding her close to him, to never let go. Instead, he spoke quietly, waking Letty gently. Letty's eyes slowly fluttered open, her eyes already shining brightly first thing in the morning.
"I must be dreaming," Letty whispered, leaning into Benedict somehow more.
"And what if you are?" Benedict smirked.
"You always hold me in my dreams," Letty whispered, eyes closing again.
Benedict felt his heart flutter before slowly waking Letty again. Letty groaned as she woke, eyes opening again. She stared at Benedict in confusion before understanding crossed her face and a few tears fell down her face. Benedict pulled her impossibly closer, letting her cry silently for a few minutes before she was able to collect herself. When she had ceased her crying, she stood, taking a few steps away from Benedict.
"I am sorry," Letty whispered. "I shall collect myself and be with you momentarily."
"Letty," Benedict's voice was soft.
"Excuse me," Letty stated, leaving the room quickly.
Letty stopped at the bottom of the stairs, staring upwards. She did not wish to go to her room and it seemed as if Benedict had predicted this would happen, as he was beside her in a moment.
"Would you like your maid to go collect you a dress for the day?" he asked softly.
"Yes, Elsie, if you will, please?"
"I'm sorry, miss," Elsie whispered. "All of your clothes were destroyed."
Letty let out a rough breath.
"Nothing to worry over. We shall prepare a carriage and head to Madame Delacroix. She always has something in my size lying about. I will ask her to replace a few dresses while we are there. Is father up? Aunt Helena?"
"Both are still in bed, my lady," Elsie explained. "Would you like me to waken them?"
"No," Letty shook her head. "Let them sleep. The carriage, please. We have much to do today."
"Surely you do not plan to begin preparations this morning," Benedict said as Elsie left.
"I do," Letty stated, turning to Benedict. "There is much to do. I must go gather mourning clothes and then I must choose flowers, check the family plot and speak to the physician. I have to prepare invitations and choose mother's last dress and coffin. There is much to do."
"You do not need to be the one to do all of it," Benedict tried.
"I am the Lady of the house," Letty argued. "It is my responsibility. Thank you, Benedict, for staying with me. You will never know how much it meant to me. You should be going now, though. You have to help prepare your brother's wedding and I will be out all day. Send your mother my gratitude for her assistance as well last night. I shall call upon Eloise in the near future to thank her as well."
"Letty," Benedict tried again.
"Is there anything else, Mr. Bridgerton?" Letty questioned, brows raising slightly.
Benedict sighed, able to tell that Letty had shut down a bit in order to get through the day.
"No," he whispered. "I shall come see you later to check on you. I remind you that the Bridgertons are here for you no matter what you may need. Goodbye, Letty."
"Goodbye, Benedict," Letty whispered once Benedict was out of the house.
Elsie returned a few minutes later, escorting Letty out of the house and to the carriage. They arrived in front of Madame Delacroix's shop just as it was opening. Madame Delacroix held the door open, giving Letty a confused look as she allowed her inside.
"Miss Everly. Whatever are you doing here so early and in day old clothing?" Madame Delacroix questioned.
"I am in need of mourning clothes," Letty stated simply. "I also need a new wardrobe, as mine has been destroyed."
"Mourning clothes?" Madame Delacroix questioned, seeming confused. "What has happened? Is it your aunt?"
"My mother," Letty explained. "Her illnesses overcame her last night after returning home. There was a mess in the process and all of my clothes are gone. I was hoping you had something I could wear for the day before I return later?"
"Yes," Madame Delacroix nodded, a few tears in her eyes for Letty. "Come. I shall have a few things for you to try on."
Letty tried on multiple dresses, finding all of them in her size as Madame Delacroix had assumed they were. She even had a black dress that was similar to a mourning dress, but not quite right. Letty decided it would be the dress she wore for the day. Letty was ordering clothing for her father and aunt, as well as a final dress for her mother when Violet and Eloise walked in.
"Hello, Lady Bridgerton. Are you here about dropping hems?" Madame Delacroix questioned.
"We are," Violet nodded, going to Letty's side. "Letty, dear, how are you?"
"I am busy," Letty sighed, looking over the dress designs for her mother.
"If you need any assistance, please allow me to help. I remember losing Edmund. I remember all of the tasks that need completing," Violet reminded her.
"I may just take you up on your offer," Letty said honestly as Marina and Lady Featherington entered the modiste's shop. "Lady Featherington. Miss Marina."
"Letty," Lady Featherington let out a sad sound, reminding Letty that Lady Featherington and her mother had been friends.
"Lady Featherington, which design would mother have preferred?" Letty asked, showing the two designs she was stuck on. "It seems that I simply cannot choose. You were her friend though so I'm sure you'd know."
"The second one," Portia answered, pointing to it. "She found that style more comfortable."
"Thank you," Letty nodded.
"May I borrow Madame Delacroix for just a moment?" Portia questioned before pulling the woman in question away.
"Letty, are you alright?" Eliose questioned.
"Not particularly," Letty admitted. "I'm afraid if I go into more detail, I'll end up crying in the middle of the modiste shop."
"I understand," Eloise nodded and it struck Letty that Eloise did understand, better than others would as she had been with her father when he had passed.
Letty took Eloise's hand, giving it a gentle squeeze before taking a deep breath.
"Thank you for trying to help last night. I appreciate your friendship, El," Letty told her.
"Of course," Eloise nodded, taking Letty's hand in both of hers and offering comfort as Madame Delacroix rejoined them.
Letty paid for the clothes before heading out of the shop and towards the flower shop. She sighed as she stared at the flowers, not wanting to get any closer.
"Would you like me to go in?" Elsie asked.
"I should be the one to choose the flowers," Letty stated, still not moving.
"What if I show you options from the window?" Elsie offered.
"That may work," Letty nodded. "Let's try it. Here's my change bag."
Letty was able to choose a posy bouquet to be hung on the door, along with a black crepe for the porch steps to signify that a death had passed in the house. Elsie sent a footman ahead to place the flowers and crepe before they returned home.
Letty ran around the ton all day, making plans and speaking to printers for invitations, along with a list she had written in the carriage for who to invite. She hoped Helena had covered the mirrors in the house while she'd been away. She should have done it before leaving that morning. She made a last stop at Madame Delacroix's, picking up a set of mourning clothes for herself, her father, and her aunt for the next day before more would be delivered in the coming days.
Letty felt her stomach growl once she returned, remembering that she hadn't eaten that day as the carriage came to a stop. She walked inside, noting the mirror covered upon entrance before taking a deep breath as she headed to the dining room, finding her father and aunt sitting quietly, both picking at their plates.
"Father," Letty stated, kissing his cheek before taking her seat.
"Where have you been?" her father asked, voice soft.
"Taking care of funeral arrangements," Letty explained. "I have a few more things to take care of tomorrow, but it is almost all complete."
"Good," her father nodded. "You've done well. Benedict Bridgerton came round not long ago. He seemed concerned for you."
"Elsie is preparing a guest room for me on the bottom floor. My room at current is a mess," Letty ignored the comment about Benedict.
"I understand if you do not wish to return to that room again," her father stated.
"Thank you for understanding," Letty nodded before looking down at her plate and slowly eating the chicken in front of her. "Is there anything you wish to take care of?"
"No. I'm sure you are handling it well," he shook his head and Letty nodded again, still looking down at her plate but growing silent now.
After a supper filled with awkward and sad silence, Letty was led to the room that she would be using for the foreseeable future. She sighed before falling onto the bed. She stood again, stripping to just her undergarment dress before climbing under the covers and turning her lantern completely off. Letty sat in the darkness, unable to sleep but unwilling to move as she stared up at the ceiling for hours.
Sleep finally overcame her and Letty had nightmares of her mother that made the sleep rather restless. The next morning, Letty wore a mourning dress as she went through the ton, completing the remainder of the tasks for the funeral before heading home again. Letty just laid on her bed, unmoving and forcing her mind to quiet for the time being.
Supper was the same as the night before, Letty informing her father that the funeral would be in three days' time in the process. The next two days were filled with silence, no one daring to speak on the days leading up to the funeral, the house keeper and maids working quietly to prepare the house. Benedict came round every night and every night he was told Letty was not receiving visitors at the time. The day of the funeral, Letty was brushing her hair slowly when her aunt came into her room, taking over brushing Letty's hair for her.
Letty was dressed and standing in the main room, receiving guests as they entered the home. She didn't look anyone in the eye, accepting their condolences without truly hearing them. It was when Pen stood in front of her that she finally came back to the present. She bit her lip hard to keep from crying and Pen could see it, squeezing her hands tightly to distract Letty until she'd calmed again. Eloise was beside her, taking Letty's hands next and doing the same.
Letty stood between her aunt and father, her brothers on her aunt's other side. Her brothers who hadn't said a single word to her since arriving. Anthony and Colin had been hesitant about leaving her side, Benedict having to be physically dragged away by his mother before the proceedings began, but her own brothers were silent, eyes dry and seeming bored. She wanted them out.
Letty bit her tongue, holding in her tears the best she could, but a few escaping anyhow. Once the funeral was over, people offered their condolences yet again and Letty could not stand it any longer. She ran up the stairs to escape everyone, standing in her old doorway and staring in at the disaster inside. She felt a presence beside her and turned her head, finding Pen standing beside her. She turned back to the room.
"I didn't even realize…" Letty trailed off, looking at everything. "There's so much to replace."
Pen remained quiet, just waiting for Letty to speak again.
"How did I not notice?" Letty asked more to herself than anything.
Pen reached out, taking Letty's hand gently. Letty let out a ragged breath and Pen moved forward, pulling Letty into a tight embrace. Letty hugged her back, accepting the comfort that Pen was offering. Pen led Letty to a room, pulling her inside and closing the door before pulling her close again and letting her break a bit. Letty pulled herself back together, wiping at her face before letting Pen fix her makeup.
Once presentable, Pen and Letty headed back down stairs to find only the Bridgertons and Featheringtons remaining behind. Pen stayed by Letty, Eloise moving to them quickly and going to Letty's other side, taking her other hand in hers. Letty noted the discomfort Pen felt as Marina approached them and pulled them to a different room quickly, avoiding Marina completely.
"Do you not like Marina?" Eloise asked once they were alone.
"Not particularly," Letty admitted. "She doesn't seem to like me, either. Glares at me at every turn. Reminds me of Cressida."
"Speaking of what did she want at the wedding?" Eloise questioned. "I saw her stop you on your way out."
"I said something nice to her and she seems to think that makes us friendly," Letty rolled her eyes. "It is not important."
"We're having a family dinner in two days," Eloise decided to change the subject. "Pen and her family will be there. Will you come?"
"I will think it over," Letty promised.
"Shall we stay the night?" Pen asked, voice soft.
"Not tonight," Letty shook her head. "Soon though."
Pen nodded and Letty pulled her into a hug. She hugged Eloise next, thanking them for their continued friendship. The two left and Letty stared out of the large window in the library, staring into the backyard as it darkened, the setting sun offering an array of colors. She heard the door open and sighed, already knowing who it was. Benedict moved to Letty's side, staring out of the window with her.
"You weren't taking visitors," he whispered.
"I needed the quiet," Letty admitted. "I feel like I'm suffocating surrounded by all of those people."
"By me?" he asked, sounding vulnerable.
Letty took Benedict's hand in hers, holding it to show him that she did not mean him, never him. She could feel Benedict's eyes on her but she refused to look at him, staring out at the backyard.
"Letty, I… When I lost my father, I was a mess. All of my siblings were, especially Eloise and Anthony. People came and went and offered their condolences but it felt as if I were disconnected completely from everything. I do not wish for you to feel that way," Benedict spoke up.
"This helps," she whispered, finally turning to him. "You help."
Benedict gave her a soft smile before leaning forward and kissing her head. Letty held her breath, memorizing the feeling of his lips on her skin before he pulled away. They stared at one another for a long moment, neither moving until Anthony entered the room.
"Benedict, we're leaving," Anthony's voice was soft.
Letty turned to Anthony, releasing Benedict and moving to him.
"Thank you," Letty told him, giving him a gentle hug before releasing him.
"Anything you need," Anthony nodded.
Letty gave a soft smile before walking them both to the front room. She walked the Featheringtons and Bridgertons out before turning to see her brothers gathering their wives and children.
"Leaving so soon?" she questioned, trying to sound as if she cared.
"We must be getting to the inn," Thomas, her eldest brother, answered. "We will be heading home tomorrow. I'm sure you understand."
"I don't," Letty stated, brow raised before she walked pass her family and to her new room.
Letty ripped the mourning dress off, forcing the buttons to break as she went. Elsie rushed forward, untying her corset quickly. Letty tossed the corset away with a sob, tears streaming down her face. She fell to the floor in just her under dress, arms wrapping around herself as she finally cried, letting out all of her anger and sadness at once. Elsie just stood to the side, staring at Letty in shock and unsure what to do.
Benedict ran into the room then, rushing through the room and finding Letty. He pulled her into his arms, sitting on the floor with her and rocking her back and forth.
"You should not be in here, sir," Elsie tried arguing but knew it would get her nowhere so she just remained where she was, making sure her lady was not ruined.
It took hours for Letty to finally fall asleep in Benedict's arms. He lifted her into his arms and laid her on her bed once she was in a deep enough sleep that he could move her without her waking. He covered her with her blanket, brushing hair from her face before leaving. Elsie escorted him out, glaring at him the entire time and locking the door behind him.
Two nights later, Letty found herself standing beside Benedict as they approached the Featheringtons home. The two had been spending more time together and Violet had been watching them closely, smiling softly at the idea of Letty truly being in the family. She had wanted the same for Penelope with Colin one day, but it seemed as if that dream was slowly becoming just that; a dream.
Marina was a polite young lady, seeming rather well put together. There was just something about her that Violet couldn't put her finger on. She felt as if, through the entire night, Portia and Marina were hiding something. They exchanged knowing looks as Marina sank her claws further into Colin's heart. She noted Pen follow Colin into the hall before noticing Letty keeping an eye on Marina, as if watching to see what the older girl would do. Marina kept glancing at the door and went to stand, Letty beating her to the action and stepping into the hall. Marina glared after Letty before following her out.
Violet may be coming up as an old woman, but she knew when something tricky was underfoot. Having so many children had made her aware of it. With Letty trying to help, she knew it would only be a matter of time before something came out. Whether Letty knew what was happening or just had an inkling of an idea, Violet did not know. She did know that Letty would protect the Bridgertons at all costs, especially after having lost her mother.
Pen returned and Letty stayed by the door, listening in. She seemed annoyed, angry by what she was overhearing. A look of realization overcame Letty's face and she stepped out of the room, going the opposite direction of where Colin and Marina were speaking. Violet turned her attention back to the older Featherington girls, clapping politely with the rest of her family. She caught Benedict's eye and knew he'd noticed the strange behavior as well.
Colin and Marina returned, making small talk before Letty finally came back, anger hiding beneath her features. Penelope went straight to Letty, dragging her from the room as the two whispered urgently back and forth. Violet decided to excuse herself for a moment, following after the two.
"You know what you need to do then," Violet was shocked, having never heard such a tone coming from Letty before. "Do it before I handle it myself."
Letty left the room, glancing to Violet but saying nothing as she left the Featherington household, Elsie following after her in a hurry. Two days later, Letty handed a copy of Lady Whistledown to Violet, sadness and shame in her eyes. Violet read the paper, hands shaking as she finished it. She looked to Letty, thoughts of Letty being Lady Whistledown rushing through her mind before Colin descended the stairs.
"Mother? What has happened?" Colin questioned.
Violet simply held the paper out to Colin, giving him a sad but firm look. Colin began reading, his bag falling from his hand and taking a step back.
Marina Thompson is pregnant, and she has been since she came to London.