"So it's on this guy called Xavier McEnroe."

In the span of mere seconds my boss's facial expression makes a number of contortions. Happy, sad, angry, afraid… As soon as you could identify one it had transitioned into another. Before long, though, her face returned to the same deadpan expression as quickly as it had just left from that shape moments ago.

She opens her mouth, and can only make out two words.

"Go on."

Quandary, seemingly unfazed by her initial reaction, goes on. "Seems like he was the initial subject of the original experiment. Back when people were getting thrown into the sim and all that."

This notion brought only more confusion out of me, wondering what the link is from that to my boss's reaction. Before I get the chance to rack my head about it any further, though, Quandary once again continues.

"Guy took the main character's body at the time, even apparently had a thing for Monika. Knowing her I don't doubt she coerced him into it somehow, but they got on well regardless until, well…"

I perk up my eyebrow. "Until…?"

"The file says something about a wedding, but after that…"

Quandary grabs the aforementioned sheet of paper, holding it up beside her face. "Obviously, this is completely unintelligible. You'd think it was a simple printing error, but…"

Setting the sheet back on the table, a different face-down piece of printer paper is taken from the pile, and she flips it to reveal its contents.

While the top half is completely intact, the entire lower section of the paper looks as if it were the victim of a serious printing error, much like the first sheet. There seems to be an annotation on this page as well, and I squint to read it.

SORRY, EQ - RESULT REPLICABLE. TRIED REPLACING INK/USING BREAK ROOM PRINTER, NO CHANGE. SHOULD BE INVESTIGATED FURTHER. -BZ

Before I have the time to think about it much more, Quandary continues. "The label basically speaks for itself, it's no mistake that half of the sheet is unreadable. There's something else at work here."

Our boss quietly retorts. "...How does this tie back to the current investigation?" This is the first time I've seen her truly unsettled, as it seems that for one reason or another this discussion has been difficult for her.

"Obviously, this Xavier guy isn't just some nobody. Files on him have been redacted unintentionally twice, and he has a connection to Monika who has been acting weird lately as well. This guy should be our top suspect, as he also has a strong motive to come back in his affection for her as well."

"Even if that's correct, though, we'd only have half of the answer. That information is no good if we don't know what body he's inhabiting," I mention, trying not to be the dead weight of the discussion.

"That Serena person has been talking to Monika a lot, hasn't she? Maybe that's him," Quandary suggests insightfully.

To the surprise of both of us, our employer contributes as well. "Serena has been a longtime friend of that snake. While it's a possibility that you're right, them just… doing friend things isn't a dead giveaway on its own."

Once again, I simply try to be helpful. "That all said, we should still focus on Serena more, as that seems like the most probable outcome."

"Sure," my boss says a little too enthusiastically, "The truth is, I did suspect Xavier to a degree already. I would give us odds above ninety percent of being correct."

"Wait, you already knew about him?" Quandary asks, shocked and slightly offended. "Why didn't you tell us a thing about it, then?"

Our boss turns around and walks away, seemingly getting ready to leave for today. She grabs a coat, putting it on as she unseals the door separating us from the rest of the supervision facility.

"I forgot."

Without another word, the door shuts behind her.

…

I try not to stare at my old friend for too long, so as to not gain much suspicion. Instead, I give myself a mental fistpump in celebration. PG seems to have noticed my excitement, as she makes a comment of her own.

"Calm down. We still have work to do."

Well aware. Any ideas on how to bridge the gap?

As Phone Girl is presumably mulling the question over, our line of communication is silent for a moment, until suddenly…

Flirt with him.

I almost lose my composure and blow my cover at PG's sudden statement. What? The fuck?

"I know it sounds bad, but-"

Wait, aren't I, like, supposed to already be in a relationship? Wouldn't that give me away?

"Who said the two of you weren't open to polyamory? Come on Xavier, I thought you were better than this."

I ignore her snarky comment and continue to question her. Seriously, though, what's been with you? First you put me in this body and have me pretend-date Natsuki, and now you have me try and fuck my best friend? I thought you were better than this!

"Okay, yeah, touché. When you say it like that, it does sound kind of shitty. I promise you, though-"

Now I really start getting heated. Oh, it sounds kinda shitty? You've fucked with me so much that we've gone way past something sounding bad, and I'm honest to god sick and tired of it. This is gonna stop or I'm gonna expose myself to your old coworkers and get us both killed.

"Xavier, listen, you're-"

Don't 'Xavier, listen' me! You know what you're doing!

Another long silence.

"Okay, I'll concede that I have messed with you a bit in the past, but-"

There always has to be a but.

Phone Girl ignores my provocation and continues. "Think about it this way. You are in a simulation of Doki Doki Literature Club, right?"

I play along. Sure.

"And Doki Doki Literature Club is a kind of fucked up horror game based on the dating sim genre, right?"

I guess.

"So isn't it only natural that we're going to have to do some weird, kind of fucked up shit to get by? That makes sense, right?"

That is literally the most cobbled-up afterthought of an excuse for your actions I've ever heard.

"You got it. Now shut up and do as I say."

I sigh out loud. Fine. But I'm not gonna be happy about it. And try to find some better material next time, for fuck's sake.

I snap out of my telepathic argument to notice that people are once again mingling, as Monika's presumably finished speaking.

Here we go, I guess.

I scan the room for any signs of Tyler, but for some odd reason he's nowhere to be seen. I can even spot Sayori still, who seems to be looking my way.

Wait, why would she-

"Hey! Serena, right? Monika's told me a lot about you."

I jump in my seat, turning around on instinct alone. Unsurprisingly, Tyler himself stands before me.

A plethora of different thoughts and emotions race through my head. I force myself to calm down, attempting to silence my brain once more.

Stay cool… Act natural…

Unfortunately, all I can eke out is one high-pitched, tiny, pathetic "Hi".

Mortified as I am it doesn't seem to bother Tyler, who simply continues where he left off. "So what brings you to the Literature Club? Don't tell me she pressured you into it."

"No, no, I just…" Still antsy, I try to pull myself together and figure out an excuse. "I'm just really into fiction, I guess?"

"Oh, that's cool! Do you write at all?"

As the conversation continues, I try my best to reflect in the background. Tyler was always a social machine, and this was a trait I appreciated and looked up to him for having. Under the current circumstances, though, it's something I'm coming to dread.

Somehow, though, despite being such a friendly guy, I don't think he's ever been in a relationship. It's not that he was never interested, as he talked about romance enough with me that it was clear he wanted to pursue it at some point, but somehow I and my comparatively inferior social skills was the one to land Elizabeth.

Elizabeth…

The two of us actually met through him, since they'd already met through high school. She had apparently gone out of state for college as opposed to the two of us who stayed local, but had moved back after graduating.

I'm honestly not too sure why we started dating, though. To be completely transparent, I don't even know if I ever truly loved her, or if I dated her just for the sake of being in a relationship with someone. My thoughts have been so clouded by Monika ever since I first showed up in the game that it's almost as if she didn't actually remove the brainwashing she initially programmed into my file.

But that did get removed… Right?

A part of me expects a snappy response from PG, but she seemingly has nothing to say.

"Serena, you all right?"

I suddenly snap back to reality, or at least my current illusion of it. Tyler stands over me with a concerned look on his face, though it quickly lightens up as I once again acknowledge his presence.

"I was worried I'd lost you! I was asking you if you wanted to go grab some lunch, possibly? You seem cool despite the whole, uh, spacing out for five minutes thing."

"Oh! Yeah, sorry about that. My mind tends to wander pretty easily, I guess." I pause for a moment after my instinctive response to consider his proposal. PG, what do you think?

No response.

…PG?

As there is no response, I start to get a bit worried. Did something really happen to her?

Did they get her?

I can feel my heart rate speeding up, as I know there is no possible way for us to succeed if she isn't here. If she's really gone, then not only is the operation hopeless, but also…

I guess I did enjoy her company a bit. Her snarky responses to everything I said, her stupid plans and her forcefem fetish.

All in all, my head would just be too empty without her.

I can feel tears start to form, and I feel like screaming. My final interaction with her was rude and bitter, and I didn't even get the chance to say-

"Hey, sorry, I was grabbing some coffee."

PG? Is that really you?

"Yeah? Miss me?"

Thank God, I thought you were-

"I know, I could still hear you. Just wasn't close enough to my mic to say anything back." Her telepathic response is accompanied by an irritatingly sharp sipping noise, presumably from her coffee. The sound of her slowly drinking hot coffee rattles through my brain and gives me a brief headache. "I did think it was cute how much you care about me in secret, though. No hard feelings about earlier, right?"

Go fuck yourself.

AN: I've had this chapter as well as a few others in my backlog for well over a year now, hopefully I can actually remember to start uploading them with any consistency LMAO