JENNIE
Once the sky began to darken, Jimin started to hurry me along.
I rolled my eyes at him. "Do you want me to get new nightgowns or what? There's a billion to choose from."
"Yes. I got down on my knees this morning and prayed you would get rid of those hideous nightshirts, but we're running out of time, ma'am." He tapped his watch. "Princess Lisa and Princess Ryujin will be waiting for you, so just pick something."
"All right, all right." I grabbed several different colors of the one I was looking at and headed toward the clerk. "And stop calling me ma'am. You're older than I am. Just call me Jen."
"Jen?" He wrinkled his nose at me. "I don't know."
"Why not?"
"It's just that Jen doesn't really seem like the name of a duchess." He looked at my face and backpedaled. "Not that there is anything wrong with Jen. What about Jennie?"
"Fine." I shrugged. "Anything is better than ma'am."
"Well, only in private of course. It would be highly inappropriate if I called you that in public."
I ground my teeth. "Okay."
"It's not so bad." He patted my arm.
The staff hadn't batted an eye when I'd come through the door, but it made me feel awkward to buy anything like a nightie. What if it ended up on the news? The cameras and news vans had lowered in numbers the longer we shopped, but as soon as I left the store I ran into a crowd of people hollering my name. Jimin put an arm around me while Becca made a path for us to the car.
I thought we were in the clear as we pulled away from the curb, but cars surrounded us almost immediately.
"What are they doing?" I leaned forward to look out the window. "This is dangerous!" I squeaked when a car swerved close to us around a corner. Our driver slammed the brakes and we skidded, just missing the curb.
"Sit back, Jennie." Jimin moved to make sure I was buckled in.
"This is cr—"
A light blue van slammed into the back of our car, making my teeth snap shut. Blood pooled in my mouth from where I nipped my tongue. I covered my lips with my hand and looked around wildly. Camera flashes blinded me as I tried to see just what had happened. A motorcycle stopped in front of our car and the person on the back snapped pictures through the front windshield.
"Are you okay?" Becca turned around in her seat.
"Yeah." I nodded my head and tried to quell the nausea that was bubbling in my stomach. Adrenaline and anger ran through my body. Balling my hands into fists I glared out the window at the people still busy taking photographs.
"Can you get us out of here?" Jimin asked.
"As soon as I have an opening." The driver never took his hands off the steering wheel.
"Should we call the police?" I looked from Becca to Jimin.
"Best to get out of here fast." Becca shook her head.
My door handle made a loud noise as someone tried to open the door. I turned to check that it was locked and almost sighed in relief when I realized it was closed for sure. The driver took his foot off the brake and edged forward. I watched as he pushed the bike with the front fender and almost cheered when the motorcycle driver pulled away from us.
Our car shot forward and I felt like celebrating, but I still felt sick. I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that someone had hit our car just to get a picture of me.
"It'll calm down, Jennie. They just don't know what to make of you." Jimin patted my arm.
"Are you kidding? They could have hurt us! They did hurt us! I bit the shit out of my tongue." I waved my hand in the air. "All that for a picture of me? Me? Why?"
"You're interesting and they make the most money by selling photos of interesting people." Jimin pursed his lips.
"I'm not interesting. I'm the same as every other person. I have to brush my teeth, use the bathroom, and take a bath, same as everyone else."
"You also just found out that you're the duchess to a huge estate in a foreign country." He frowned. "I understand what you're saying, and they shouldn't behave the way they are, but it's because you are interesting. Things will calm down."
"Please don't say eventually." I shook my head. "Everyone keeps telling me that it will calm down eventually, but it just seems to be getting worse."
"I know." He frowned and looked out the window as we reached the palace gates.
The car deposited me and my bags at the main door while Jimin basically pulled me into the palace. That was fine by me. I didn't want to stay in that car another second.
Ryujin and Lisa were chatting near the entrance to a room. They were both wearing jeans and I felt incredibly overdressed. This was the first time I had seen Lisa in jeans and I had to admit it might be my favorite view of her. Her worried gaze found mine immediately.
"Are you okay?" She took a step toward me and stopped.
"Yeah. I'm okay." I ran a hand through my hair but dropped it when I realized it was shaking. "It was pretty crazy."
"We heard the bodyguards talking about it. That must've been scary." Ryujin shook her head. "I'm so sorry they're hounding you like this."
"Maybe when they figure out how boring I am, they'll leave me alone." I tried to make a joke, but it sounded a bit too hopeful.
"I'm sure it's going to calm down." Lisa's fingers opened and closed by her legs. She looked antsy. In fact she looked as shaken up as I felt.
"You went shopping without me!" Ryujin glared at the bags someone carried in. I was grateful the subject change. I didn't want to think about what had just happened.
"It was Jim's fault. He made me do it." I pointed at my assistant, who rolled his eyes at me.
"Trust me, there is still much more to do." He lifted the bags. "I will take care of these, Jennie. Enjoy your night out with these two." He gestured with a full hand toward Lisa and Ryujin. My heart froze. I'd almost forgotten I would have to go back out in that mess. "Don't let them get you into any trouble, and call me if you need me when you get back." He winked at me as he turned around so the others couldn't see.
"Thanks, Jimin."
"We don't have to go out." Lisa watched me carefully, a small tic running along her jaw.
I thought about it for a minute. I didn't want to go out. I wanted to curl up somewhere quiet and hide. But I also didn't want to stop living just because some nutso person wanted my picture.
"I'll call for extra security," Ryujin offered. "If you want. Or we can try again another day."
"No. Let's go." I was glad my voice sounded so sure, because the rest of me wasn't. "Mind if I run and change? These shoes are killing me." My feet were screaming in agony. I'd throw them away if I could forget how much they had cost.
"Of course." Lisa leaned against the wall and tucked her hands into her coat.
"I'll be quick." I hurried down the hallway in the direction of my room, only to stop and look around, confused. I looked back behind me and Ryujin was smiling. Lisa pointed to the right, so I nodded my head and took that hall.
Jimin was standing at my door and held up one of my new sweaters.
"Be careful tonight."
"I will." I blew him a kiss as I took it out of his hand ducked into the room. I changed quickly, pulling my hair down from the clip I had been wearing and grabbing my scarf. I threw my necessities into my pockets and headed back to the others. The entire walk back I chanted in my head: I can do this. I will have fun. I can do this. I will have fun. I didn't want the media to stop me from seeing my new country.
By the time I got there, my stomach was growling and Ryujin laughed. "I think someone needs dinner."
"I haven't eaten since noon." I winced.
"We can fix that. Do you have a preference?" Lisa opened the door for us and I shook my head. I noticed there was a second car behind us, containing several bodyguards.
"I'd settle for a peanut butter sandwich at this point."
"We can do better than that," Ryujin said as we climbed into the car.
"What do you have in mind, Ryu?" Lisa sat next to me, her leg brushing mine.
"How about that little place you like in the South District?" Ryujin poked at her stomach. "The one with all the greasy burgers."
"I don't know. I just got back from the States, I'm not sure these will measure up. Why not get some local food?" Lisa turned to look at me.
"Sounds good."
Ryujin gave the name of the restaurant to the driver and we headed into town. Reporters followed us as soon as we left the palace gates. Ryujin shook her head, but I could see how tense Lisa was next to me.
"What's the big deal? We're just going to dinner." I frowned. Maybe we should have just stayed at the palace. Ordered pizza or something.
"They're hoping to catch an embarrassing shot." Lisa sighed. "It's their livelihood."
"Like ketchup on our chin?" I was trying to lift some of the dreariness that had settled over the car.
"Like us stumbling drunk out of a bar." Ryujin shook her head. "Like we would ever do that."
"It happens." Lisa frowned at her. "Kai is often photographed acting like a baboon at nightclubs."
"Kai just likes to have a good time." Ryujin looked out the windows. "Look, Jennie! There's the Kim monument!"
I looked out the window surprised. "Really?"
"Yes. Your family fought off a northern invasion and gave the capital enough time to rally troops." Lisa looked out the window with me as we drove past the large statue. A man rode a rearing horse, sword held high.
"How about that." I felt a little bubble of pride in my chest. My family had faced down invaders.
"Just down the road here is the Lilarian library. There are paintings of some of the earliest families inside. You should go visit them when you have time." Ryujin was proving to be an excellent guide. "Oh! And that's the Sverelle Bridge. Our mother's family is responsible for it being here. It's one of the few that survived the Nazis occupation."
"Wow." And I meant it. There was intense pride in her voice for the work of their family and that of their country, and I understood. This was their home and they could literally trace their ancestors back to massive historical moments or places. It gave the history a life, a face.
We pulled up to a small family style restaurant situated between two buildings. There was faint music spilling out of the door, and I could smell food as soon as Duvall opened the car door. The press were on us immediately and I felt my hackles rise. I was trying to get used to the idea, but they certainly weren't giving me any adjustment time. Lisa opened the door for us and a tall thin man greeted us inside.
"Your Highnesses, Duchess. A pleasure to see you." He bowed to us.
"We've been coming here since we were kids, Luca. Why are you suddenly bowing?" Ryujin pulled her coat off and hung it on a rack near the door. A few of the patrons inside turned to look at us, but for the most part seemed more interested in their food.
"Ah, but this is Duchess Kim's first visit!" Luca smiled widely. He motioned us to follow him, and he sat at us at a booth in the back. It was far from the little window at the front and I knew he was used to dealing with public figures.
"You're going to love this place." Ryujin smiled at me over the table. She pushed a menu at me. "I already know what I want."
Lisa eyed the booth for a minute before taking a seat next to her sister. I was relieved. Sitting next to her in the car had been difficult enough. It's amazing the little things you notice about someone when you have the hot's for them. Like the way she smells or how long her legs are compared to mine. Then there are the other things, like wondering how her hands would feel running over my skin. Things I wouldn't think about sitting next to just anyone, but here I was thinking about them and trying to pretend that I wasn't.
I opened the menu and looked over the selections. I frowned when I realized it was in Lilarian. There weren't even any pictures to help me pick. I looked up at my companions and Lisa was watching me with shrewd eyes.
"Need help?"
"A translator would be nice." I winced and laid down the open menu on the table. "I have no idea where to begin. I want to try something new."
"I hadn't thought about that. You don't speak Lilarian, do you?" Ryujin shook her head. "You need a teacher."
"I have a teacher." I raised my eyebrow at Lisa. "I won one in a bet."
"Really?" Ryujin looked at her sister. "You lost at something?"
"Don't." Lisa shook her head. "It'll never happen again."
"What was it? The bet?" Ryujin looked at me, her large eyes wide with curiosity.
"I beat her at Monopoly." Lisa groaned and leaned back in her seat.
"No way!" Ryujin leaned forward. "Did you figure it out? She has to be cheating. There's no way she's won that many times otherwise!"
"Maybe the karma gods thought it was time she lost." I shrugged.
"Karma gods, huh? Well, it's about time." Ryujin sat back in her seat.
"So, foreign-language teacher. Tell me what this is!" I pointed at the first thing on the menu.
"Well, that is the word for stuffed." Lisa grinned while Ryujin laughed.
"Oh." I looked at the menu and wondered if there were any words that wouldn't trigger naughty thoughts.
"And I said I'd be your teacher, not your translator." Lisa shook her head.
"Well, you're not doing such a good job. I've been here a day and know nothing. I think I should get the drawing as forfeit." I narrowed my eyes at her. Luca brought over three glasses of water, wineglasses, and a bottle before quickly departing.
"Drawing? Is that the one I saw on your desk?" Ryujin turned toward Lisa with a small smile.
"Miss Nosy wanted to know what I was working on, so I made a bet. I won."
"So she hasn't seen the picture?" Ryujin narrowed her eyes at Lisa.
"No. But she does owe me a week of volunteer work for the FBT."
"Then how did she end up being your Lilarian teacher?" Ryujin looked at me, confused.
"It was a long flight. Lisa lost the second game."
"Ha! Lisa, you better start teaching her, or that lovely sketch isn't going to belong to you anymore."
"Fine." She leaned forward and pointed at the menu. "This is the word for stuffed. What do you think would be good stuffed?" Her eyes twinkled at me in the candlelight. I could think of something I'd like to stuff, all right. And who I'd like to do the stuffing.
"Chicken? Lamb? Some kind of pasta?" I ignored the innuendo, though it was hard to do.
"Chicken. So, this is the word for chicken, this is stuffed, and see how these words are in the front? They tell you what the chicken is stuffed with. Here." She turned the menu so that it was facing me. "See if you can figure out any of the other dishes with these words."
"What is this? Advanced classes? What happened to starting with the alphabet?" I let my eyes run over the menu and tried to pick out words that seemed familiar. There were a few words I remembered from my high school French class.
"Go over there and help her! She's starving and Luca will be back any minute." Ryujin shoved her shoulder.
She looked at me and I could see the hesitation in her eyes, but she slid out of the booth and in beside me. Leaning close, she pointed out some of the words that would help me most. After a minute I'd found a dish that sounded great and we were ready to order. Luca came over, blocking Lisa's exit from my side of the booth, and started pouring wine.
"This is one of my favorites. A celebration to the duchess coming home!" Luca smiled at me and I lifted my cup before taking a sip. I wasn't much of a drinker, so had no idea if it was a good vintage or not. It also struck me as odd every time someone welcomed me home. I understood why they said it, but home would always be in the States where I had grown up.
"To the Kim family." Ryujin lifted her glass.
"To Jennie." Lisa looked at me over her glass of wine.
The food was delicious and I was completely satisfied by the time Luca brought several bowls of chocolate mousse.
"I don't have room!" I groaned.
"Make room! You don't turn down Luca's mousse. It's amazing." Ryujin dove into her bowl with relish and I looked at Lisa. She had finally relaxed next to me and stayed there through the dinner. Her arm lay on the back of the booth and her long legs stretched out under the table.
"Where does she put it all?"
"No idea, but if you want to try it, you better do it before she finishes hers."
"You only live once, Jen! Try it!" Ryujin nudged my bowl with her finger and I realized that was the first time she had called me by my nickname. A little piece of me relaxed and I picked up my spoon.
The dessert melted in my mouth and it was like I had swallowed a little piece of heaven. I closed my eyes and just enjoyed the flavors. There was a hint of raspberry from the sauce that made me consider pouring the rest of the bowl in my mouth. Forget the spoon. When I opened my eyes, Ryujin was nodding her head in agreement, but Lisa was watching my mouth with a stony expression.
"Told you! It's like crack. Or, I think it's like crack. What drug is it that only takes one time?" Ryujin tilted her head thoughtfully. I was struck in that moment by her youthful eyes and guarded upbringing. No wonder she didn't see Kai for what he truly was.
"That would be it." I took another bite but tried to keep my reaction sedate. "And this is definitely addicting."
"Don't tell the head chef at the palace, but his chocolate mousse doesn't even compare." Ryujin sighed.
"My lips are sealed."
As we were finishing up, there was a commotion at the door. I looked over the booth to see Luca talking angrily to a man at another table. The man tried to calm him down but eventually stood up and pointed a camera at our table. A large chef and waiter joined Luca as they tried to push the man out the front door. Luca was hollering in Lilarian, but from his tone I could tell it wasn't very pleasant. Becca and Duvall showed up at the table, blocking our view of the scene. Or, more importantly, blocking the camera's view of us.
I tried to calm my racing heart. There were a lot of people in the little restaurant who wouldn't let anything bad happen to me. I just couldn't believe the trouble the photographers were going through for a picture.
"Oh, poor Luca." Ryujin sighed and set down her spoon.
"Duvall, make sure we take care of that man's dinner. I don't want Luca losing money just because someone was trying to take our picture." Lisa leaned toward the people standing outside our booth.
"Of course, Ma'am."
"Why are they so focused on us? Is it like this all the time?" I frowned at them. What had I gotten into that I couldn't go enjoy dinner with friends?
"I haven't seen them this rabid since…" Ryujin trailed off at a quick look from Lisa. "I'm sure it'll calm down, Jen. They just want pictures of the new duchess."
"Did they do this with the other guy? The duke that was reinstated?" I had feeling what she had been about to reference.
"No." Lisa shook her head. "But you're younger, so they feel like you're more interesting."
"Not to mention beautiful." Ryujin smiled at me. "All that dark hair and your dark eyes."
"That too, of course." Lisa gave me a small smile.
"There's also a lot of press about you and Lisa. They love to drum up romance stories." Ryujin leaned forward, resting her elbow on the table. "They'd just love it if you two were an item."
"We're friends," Lisa and I said in unison. I chuckled weakly.
"Of course you are." Ryujin sat back in the booth with innocent eyes.
I felt queasy and I wasn't sure if it was from all the food or the reminder of what life would be like if I did give in to Lisa. We ended up leaving through the back door. There were too many people out front for us to be able to reach the cars. Luca had boxed up some of his chocolate mousse for us to take and apologized that our dessert had been interrupted.
"That wasn't your fault!" I shook my head.
"I should have realized he was paparazzi." Luca said the word like it was an insult.
"Thank you for watching out for us." Lisa followed her words with a few in Lilarian, which seemed to make Luca happy. We left, getting in the cars and zipping out into the streets.
We drove around for a little while, Lisa and Ryujin living instructions to the driver so that I could see a bit more of the city. We never stopped and got out, but I didn't complain. It was cold and I was tired. Not to mention, I didn't want to deal with the press again. When we got back to the palace, I took my little box of chocolate mousse and dragged my sorry tail inside.
"Do you remember how to get to your room?" Ryujin asked, a hint of mischief in her eyes. "Lisa can you show you. Her room is down that way too."
"I'm heading to bed anyway. I have to be up early tomorrow for a meeting." Lisa kissed Ryu's cheek.
"Thanks for showing me around," I said to Ryujin.
"No problem. When things calm down we'll do some more." Ryujin reached out and hugged me. "It's nice to have another friend here."
"Looks like there are lots of friends." I frowned, thinking of her mother, aunt, and the women I'd seen working earlier that day.
"It's not the same thing." Ryujin looked at me with shimmery eyes. I handed her my mousse and she instantly brightened up. "You don't want it?"
"Nah. Your puppy-dog eyes just broke my heart a little. Take it."
"Thanks!" Ryujin took off in a flash and I stood there with my mouth open.
"C'mon." Lisa chuckled beside me. She placed her hand on my back and I almost sighed with relief. Just a few days ago I had thought it was silly when she did it, now I had come to look forward to it. "You better build up a tolerance to Ryu's anime eyes or you'll never get another dessert."
"Ha! They did look like a pathetic anime waif. She's got it down pat."
"You have no idea. She has four dogs and two cats. Dad couldn't tell her no. They're all incredibly old now and the staff is always having to clean up behind them." Lisa chuckled.
"She must've been very young when you lost him." I watched her out of the corner of my eye. We hadn't talked about it, but I knew that the king had died from an aneurysm almost ten years ago.
"She was, but Mother has made sure she never felt neglected."
We turned onto the hallway my room was on and I stopped at my door. I pulled the key out of my pocket and played with it for a minute. "Thanks for taking me out to see a bit of the city."
"You're welcome. It was nice to get to relax." Lisa smiled at me. "I don't get to spend as much time with Ryu as I used to."
"She's great." I bit my lip. I was making small talk because I didn't want to say good night yet. And I sucked at it.
"We can do it again sometime." She was watching me closely.
"That would be fun." I sighed. "I really suck at this."
"At what, exactly?" she smiled her devil smile.
"This whole small-talk thing. I'm not good at it." I motioned between us. "But I want to be. I don't want stuff to be weird between us."
"I think you're doing just fine. I don't seem to recall you having a hard time in Minnesota."
"I'm out of my element here. And I tend to blab whatever I'm thinking when I'm nervous."
"I've noticed." Lisa lowered her voice. "It's quickly becoming one of my favorite things about you."
"Why is that?"
"Because when you blab whatever you're thinking, I find out you're thinking about me."
"You get all that from me being worried about small talk?" I shot her a skeptical look.
"You don't worry about it with anyone but me." She leaned down and kissed my cheek. "Good night, Jennie."
"Good night, Lisa."
In my room one of the new nightgowns was laid out with a robe. I looked at it for a minute before picking it up. I stuck it in the top drawer next to my big T-shirts and grabbed a tank top and pair of shorts instead. On my desk was a stack of papers, including a schedule for the next day. I had to okay shots that the royal photographer had taken, sign a form detailing how much it would cost to fly my father over, and there was paperwork from my college to terminate my classes.
I glanced at the pictures and initialed the paper, agreed to whatever it cost to get my father over safely, and stared at the paperwork from school. It was all so bland and boring; nothing in the wording pointed out how I was giving up a lifelong ambition or how much I already missed my birds. I squeezed the pen in my hand and flipped through the pages again. There were no personal notes, nothing telling me they cared that I'd left the program. Just a blank line waiting for my signature.
I signed my dreams away with angry strokes. Throwing the pen down, I got up and went to sleep with tears in my eyes.