Noodle and beef salad with cilantro had been a new meal for Hank to try. He had very much enjoyed it, and had completely emptied the large bowl that Kalinda had served it in.
"That was a delicious," he said. "And I don't mean nice but I'm saying delicious, I mean delicious."
"Glad you enjoyed it," Kalinda said happily. She took his bowl and his empty beer bottle and headed for the kitchen. "Another beer?"
"Please." Hank sat back and relaxed on the couch. Kalinda had told him to make himself at home. The fact that he felt able to do so on his first time visiting said a lot. They had gotten very comfortable around each other very quickly.
"So, what's the news you want to tell me?" Kalinda asked, returning with a beer for Hank and a glass of red wine for herself. She sat back down beside him and snuggled up to him.
"Don't repeat this to anyone. The reason Deputy-Superintendent Miller came to see me is the higher-ups have decided they want me out of Intelligence. She wanted to offer me some advice – to take the option to retire with full pension before the hammer comes down. I'm going to do just that."
Kalinda had moved so that she could look him in the eyes. "Christ on a bike, Hank. Why are they forcing you out? And how is this happening when I've been working for you for less than two weeks?"
"The timing sucks, I know. Believe me when I tell you I had absolutely no idea this was going to happen until Miller dropped the bomb on me. But once she laid it all out, I saw that taking my pension and getting out is the best option. To answer your other question, they want me out basically because they can't stand my personality or the way I do my job. To say I've never made friends in high places would be understating it. But don't get hung up on it, this isn't a bad thing. It's a good thing actually."
"How so?" she asked, willing to hear him out. She took a big sip from her wine glass.
"For a start, we won't have to worry about dating each other and working together anymore."
"That is a good point," she admitted.
"Yes. And secondly, I've already got something lined up. Erin and I have done a lot of talking and we've decided to start up a private detective service." As he was speaking, he was adjusting what he planned to say because he was considering it less and less likely that Kalinda would join them by the moment. "In an ideal world I'd try to recruit you, but I feel you wouldn't want to leave Intelligence right after joining. Am I right?"
"No, I couldn't do that," she said, confirming his suspicions. It was fine, and expected, albeit disappointing. As he had told himself before arriving, he had to accept her decision without resistance. "Quitting a job two weeks in would look horrendous on my record. Not to mention that Intelligence is a big opportunity for me. It's bloody crap that you're going, however there isn't any uncertainty in my mind about how successful you'll be as a private detective. To be honest, leaving Intelligence might rid you of some baggage too."
Hank hadn't considered that. Now that the thought was in his head, he wondered if it might be true. He saw Anna Avalos in his mind's eye. Her death was something he would carry for the rest of his life, Intelligence or no Intelligence. Maybe the change of scenery would help him with moving on though? That seemed possible.
"You might be right about that," he said.
Kalinda put a comforting hand on his led. "Sorry if I sounded selfish just now. This is a huge blow for you and you're being treated unfairly, yet I made it about me. That wasn't on."
"Don't be silly," he said, resting a hand on top of hers. "It was a shock to you as well and it's only natural to think about how it might impact the job you've just taken. The timing is really bad, it's true. You'll do great work with Intelligence whether I'm there or not though. There is one thing I want to ask: Assuming things keep going well for us, and assuming the new company works out, would you consider joining at a later date?"
"Assuming those things, I'd consider it. I'll put at least six months into Intelligence first, then we'll see how things stand on all fronts. Fair enough?"
Hank nodded. "Fair enough." It was all he could realistically have hoped for. He drank some of his beer to create a break in conversation for a subject change. "You mentioned earlier that you're a very spiritual person. We've not talked about religion. I mean, do you practice one?"
Kalinda appeared comfortable with the subject as she answered, moving back to her position cuddled up against him. "I don't practice per-se. My parents were Hindu. They wanted me to practice it also. To an extent, I suppose I do. I believe in God, I believe in re-incarnation, and I very much believe in karma. Most days, I'll make time to pray. However there are Hindu disciplines that I don't follow, for example I eat meat and drink alcohol. So I'd say I have some Hindu beliefs, but I'm not exactly practicing the religion. Does that make sense?"
"It does," Hank said. He was grateful for explanation, but embarrassed by his ignorance. "Forgive me. I don't know much about Hinduism. Am I right in thinking you don't celebrate Christmas?"
"I have no problem getting together with people and having a good time at Christmas, but no, I don't celebrate it. I wouldn't accept Christmas gifts, for example. Diwali is the Hindu equivalent of Christmas, you could say. That was a few weeks ago."
"Ah, just missed getting to be a part of it with you," Hank said with disappointment. "Again, forgive my ignorance. Is there anything I need to avoid doing so as not to offend your beliefs?"
Kalinda shifted position again and kissed him on the lips. "That's sweet of you. No, is the answer. My expectations are no different because of my religion. I want a partner to treat me with respect, with kindness, with affection. I want a partner who treats others with respect. A partner needs to have good manners and morals, as well as being intelligent enough to intellectually stimulate me. It's remarkable how many of those boxes my ex was unable to tick, now that I think about it," she added reflectively.
Once more, Hank was almost spellbound by her wonderful accent and choice of words. He felt sure he could listen to her talk for hours at a time and enjoy every second of it. "And how many do I tick?" he asked in an attempt to reintroduce some humour to the conversation.
"A few," she admitted, as if having to carefully consider it. "No, you tick all of them so far. That's... why I feel so close you already." The words themselves were not particularly remarkable. It was the way they were delivered that meant so much to Hank. There had been real feeling in her words.
"I feel very close to you already too, Kalinda. You make me feel things I never thought I would feel again." With that, he leaned in and kissed her. It led to a few minutes of making out.
"Remember the first time you were about to kiss me?" she asked when they stopped kissing. The thought made her laugh. "Like a complete moron, I poured wine all over your couch."
Hank laughed. "Yes, I remember. Then as soon as I cleaned it up, Erin showed up at the door. It wasn't meant to be that night."
"What does Erin think of me, Hank? Things seemed okay between us when I came over for dinner the other night, I thought."
"She likes you. I'm not just saying that. She actually told me she likes you. We were talking about you this morning, and Erin pointed out that I'm getting into an interracial relationship for the first time in my life. Obviously that's not an issue for me at all, but it did make me think about how some of our past experiences must be different. I'm not wording this very well."
"You're trying to ask about the racism I've experienced?" she deduced.
"Yeah. Trying to do it without offending you."
"Telling you what I've experienced won't offend me. The fact that you thought to ask is important and appreciated. Truth be told, I've encountered racism my whole life, to the point where it doesn't bother me much anymore."
Hank drank some beer and supressed his anger at the thought of her being abused by people.
"I can go into detail on some of if you like?" Kalinda was saying.
"If you feel comfortable doing that," he replied. He didn't want her upset, but he did want to try to educate himself through her experiences.
"Sure," she said comfortably. "I mean, it started at school. People calling me a Paki and asking me what corner shop I owned. It was what you'd call a meme these days that in England there was a shop on the corner of every street owned by a Pakistani family. The fact that I'm Indian didn't matter. White kids just saw brown faces and called them Pakis. Then there have always been jokes about smelling funny. Incense or strong spices leave a smell on you. Pleasant smells in my opinion, but there were countless times I was called a smelly Paki."
"Hideous that people's kids behaved like that," Hank said.
"Adults are worse. Kids were most often simply trying to provoke a reaction for fun. As I got older, I encountered people who said racist things out of genuine hatred. 9/11 kicked that into high gear, even in England, where I still lived at the time. That happened and suddenly I was being looked at like I was evil incarnate by a truly frightening number of people. Even while in police uniform I was called a terrorist. I was also told I should apologise, should go back to where I came from, and on, and on."
"That's absolutely disgusting," Hank said. It made him feel physically angry, way beyond mental anger. It was the kind of anger he experienced at work sometimes, when things got out of hand. He forced himself to calm down a bit, and in a few moments the worst of it passed.
"Most of the time I would ignore it. There's no point trying to argue with racists," she went on. "Their minds are made up on their bigoted views. But sometimes I wouldn't be able to stop myself and I'd snap at someone and demand to know what 9/11 had to do with me when I'm Indian. Then I'd get a response like, 'You're all the same, aren't you?' Truly appalling stuff, Hank."
Hank held her tighter and kissed her on the cheek. It was the only accessible place because of the way they were sitting. "I'm sorry. That's all I can say. It's embarrassing to be the same species as trash like that."
"That it is. These days it's not bad, but there's still racism. There probably always will be. Often it's not comments anymore because thankfully it has become less acceptable to be openly racist. These days it's more likely to be looked at like vermin that has just crawled out of the gutter. The other day when were having coffee someone walked by and gave us that look. No doubt he was judging you for being with me. And that was just while we were having breakfast." She shifted position again and looked at him. "You're going to encounter that, Hank. Unfortunately you need to be aware, but you also need to be capable of not reacting to it. Can you do that?"
He wanted to say no. He wanted to say he would confront anyone who behaved like that. Kalinda obviously wanted the opposite, though. Her view was that it was a waste of time and energy trying to educate the uneducable, so he had to respect that. How well that might go in the reality of such a situation was another matter. "It feels wrong to ignore people behaving like that. I do hear what you're saying though, so yes, if I see it I'll do my best to ignore it."
"Thank you," Kalinda said, giving him a kiss on the lips. With that, she finished her glass of wine. "Can I get you another drink?"
"Yes, thank you," Hank said, chugging his beer as she got off the couch to go and get him a replacement. Watching her walk away, the thought occurred to him that he would do anything to protect Kalinda. That was how strongly he felt about her. Was this what people meant when they said 'whirlwind romance'? In the past he had been of the opinion that such talk was bullshit, that it was impossible to deeply fall for someone in a matter of a couple of weeks. But now it had happened to him.
A/N: Kalinda is not prepared to join the upcoming private detective service, for now at least. Do you think a time will come where she changes her mind?
Meanwhile, Hank's feelings for her continue to grow stronger. Has he found love at last, after so many years alone?