(Please see all previous disclaimers, m preg mentioned)
Aquaformer took her calmed, sparked mate home. She knew Optimus felt out of sorts as she had felt that way when she was sparked. And even though he was sparked with fewer than she had been, this was still his first and could be very dangerous if not carefully monitored. She knew he would get moody, hence she had watched for the troublesome moods and had taken him to the med bay before he could cause any harm or damage. She hoped this was the only aggressive mood.
Optimus, for his part in this, felt more vulnerable than usual. True he had kicked Megatron's sorry aft, but this was totally different. This time, he was not in control of things and it bothered him greatly. He wished he had asked Aquaformer more about being sparked before agreeing to this, but he wouldn't change it for the world as he knew how bad she was the day he had taken them from her and taken them into his own systems with help from Ratchet. Still, he wished he had known more.
"Are you okay, my love?" Aquaformer asked as they entered their quarters. She hoped Optimus was doing okay and could tell he seemed a bit out of sorts.
"I'm fine" he tried answering, unaware he had given away the fact that he wasn't fine. In fact, he seemed more out of sorts than before.
"You know, if you feel off, you can talk to me" Aquaformer offered up, knowing her mate was more likely to talk when she gave him an opening rather than catching him in a corner, so to speak.
Optimus sighed. He hadn't wanted to talk but she was just making it too easy, too compelling. "I just wish…" he started saying. Aquaformer didn't verbally respond, but she gently rubbed his strong back. "I just wish I had known more about being sparked."
Aquaformer gently snuggled into her mate. "Everyone reacts differently even though there are some common signs. Even if you had asked me, what I went through may or may not have been similar to what you are going through" Aquaformer offered up supportively.
"Did you ever have rage episodes?" Optimus asked, unaware of what he would learn. He figured she hadn't had any as she never showed any signs.
"I did, several in fact" Aquaformer answered, not wanting to reveal what she had done during them as the war was still going on for all of them.
"What did you do during them?" Optimus asked, wanting to know. He wasn't quite prepared for what he would hear.
Aquaformer sighed before answering. "The war was still going on, and so I would go find Starscream or one of the other aerial Decepticon bots and blast them to kingdom come" Aquaformer reluctantly revealed.
Optimus looked at her, a bit stunned. He didn't know what to say, but he could tell she hadn't wanted to tell him but felt compelled to. Carefully, Optimus hugged his mate. Aquaformer appreciated the hug and snuggled into her mate. He may have been the sparked bot, but there was no place she felt more safe, secure, loved or wanted than in his arms. Both figured they would collect their young ones later. For now, they would just enjoy one another's company.