Upon seeing our friend Olxebak wounded, ET gave me a nod like I should do something.

I stared at him questioningly, doubtful I could heal bullet wounds like I used to, but I had healed a plant fish, and received some of my power back, so I decided to at least humor him.

As I rushed to the victim and laid hands upon him, ET hurriedly levitated himself closer to Warkinde, using his power to float the weapon out of the attacker's frog hands.

With a nasty smile, Warkinde glowed red, using his own power to levitate the weapon back.

"Oh no you don't!" Jamie charged forward, flipping the switch on her collar.

She faced the flying bike and screamed.

The core of the bike shattered, engine pieces, shell and pipes flying in every direction. Warkinde fell wailing off into the withered foliage somewhere.

"No!" ET shouted. "What did you do?"

Jamie rolled her eyes, shutting off her collar. "Got rid of the nut with the gun. You're welcome!"

ET elevated himself in the air, searching for the foe.

He settled back on the ground. "Now we don't know where to find Pabyeba!"

My girlfriend scoffed. "He'd rather be dead! Unbelievable!"

While this had been happening, I'd been trying to heal. It seemed I did retain some healing power, and when Gertie joined me, the bullets popped out of Olxebak's body, and his flesh restored to a bruised, yet healthy state.

We still faced the oozing black things. Apparently Warkinde or someone else had imbued them with life, independently of his presence in the area.

ET brought out his Shamisen again, and to my surprise started in on a very rock metal sounding tune. Never heard it before, don't think it came from earth. A little baroque, but heavy, with power chords and an augmented fourth (In case you're wondering, Roy knew a few musical terms).

The song didn't appear to affect our foes. Instead, musical scores appeared in the air before us.

Having studied the circular spider-webby diagrams for a few hours, we had no difficulty figuring out what to do next. We hadn't rehearsed this one, but we could read the notation.

The music didn't work in our favor.

We started out playing okay, at least I thought, but I guess we must have hit a few `brown notes, for a ball of energy flew from my pipe organ and struck dalmatian spotted Yizewo, causing feathers to erupt from her body. She even sprouted a cockatoo mohawk. Roy's recorder filled the air with a fried chicken smell.

Jamie had the worst job of all: Deciphering lyrics. I don't know if it were the words or not hitting the right notes, but it resulted in a lot of small rocks flying around and hitting everybody. Spike had to rush in and use his powers to shield us.

To my astonishment, Yizewo had musical skill. She corrected the mistake by singing a duet with my girlfriend, steering her toward the proper notes. Then Olxebak scanned the illusion with a miniature computer and cranked up a music machine.

Whatever they did, it helped. Our inky black foes caught fire...which unfortunately filled the air with smog.

The creatures shambled forward like zombies coated in napalm, goopy claw fingers extended threateningly. Without warning, they launched fire bombs at us, cannon-like.

We ducked out of the way and kept performing the best we could. Spike shielded Roy and Olxebak from a fireball.

Thanks to her new singing coach, Jamie caused a few of our foes to explode. The other oil creatures, already on fire, burned brighter under the pressure of our alien instruments, the blaze swelling until they collapsed on the ground and could no longer move or throw things at us.

It seemed our foes had been vanquished. We performed a few minutes longer before cautiously putting up our instruments.

"Yeah!" Roy cheered. "Finally showed those guys we got backbone!"

ET buried his face in his hands for a moment. "Jamie!"

She removed her collar. "What's up, ET?"

ET rubbed his forehead like he had a headache. "What you did...frustrated and angered me...But I understand why you did it. To save lives..." He looked away. "Go inside ahead of me. I need to orient myself with my feelings."

Jamie shrugged indifferently. "Okay."

ET looked like he'd just eaten a lemon, but said nothing.

Jamie marched to the bumpy building's automatic door.

I followed her in.

An enclosed courtyard of sorts, containing banks of small computers, shelves stuffed with books, scrolls, computer disks and little shiny records of various sizes. Lovely domed skylight. Round tables scattered with more of the same. Flower boxes had been stationed all around the perimeter, but all the plants looked wilted.

Qulpari stood frowning at the sculptured fountain in the center of the room, currently gushing black goop. They grumbled amongst themselves, asking each other how to shut off the sprayer.

"Hey, don't worry about it," Jamie announced. "We got a friend who works on machines. He might be able to help."

I stared. Jamie didn't actually have a Jandaga in her ear. "You understood what they were saying?"

She shrugged.

"But how?"

"Um, by learning the language? We've spent what, like days with these guys?"

It seemed our musical mishap hadn't been the only incident of Qulpari growing things from their body. One of them, to my absolute shock, had body hair. An actual coat of red fur covering his body, apparently grown. "We would appreciate the help, Boofsuru."

My girlfriend bristled at this. "My name is Jamie. The Boofsuru is outside."

I frowned at her.

"What?" She reddened when she caught my disapproving look. "I meant it in the nicest possible way. She's...a little weird, but I love her. Besides, they don't know her actual name."

I asked the red Qulpari where he was from. "Kuaxpab. It's to the far north."

Olxebak strolled into the chamber, followed by Yizewo. The latter looked rather sheepish, clearly embarrassed by her new feathery look. A few Qulpari pointed and laughed, but one gave her compliments.

Olxebak actually did know something about how to fix the fountain. Although somewhat annoyed at putting him on the spot, he brought out some tools and set to work, shutting off the fountain.

"I've never seen it do that before," a Qulpari told me. "The plants are dying. What's going on?"

"I don't know. Something's wrong with the water table."

"We actually sent someone to get the valve shutoff tools, but we were worried about the source of the water. This sludge is coming from the water table?"

I nodded. "An enemy polluted it."

The stranger shook his head sadly.

Roy and Spike joined us, frowning at the wrinkled plants, the fountain full of sludge.

Roy crossed his arms. "Just so I have this clear: There's actually a way to fix all this?"

I could only shrug. "ET just said we could go in here and find out if anything can be done. He didn't actually say we could fix it."

Jamie plopped down at a table, but then scowled at the shortness. "They're aliens. I'm sure they can do something. You've been here longer than any of us, Roy. Are you saying you've never seen them fix the environment before?"

Roy sighed. "I haven't seen pollution like this on Jufuceri...ever."

She shook her head, poking at a computer. "Feels like I'm at the kid's table at Thanksgiving," she muttered to herself.

Charlie flew in, landing on a table. Like a dog, he kicked things off, papers, books, computers, until he had a little resting place for himself. One of the Qulpari frowned at him with their hands on their waist. Qulpari don't have much of a waist before their feet, but you get the idea.

I think my sister had been outside talking to ET. When she stepped into the room, some of the Qulpari muttered "Boofsuru" again. She ignored them, staring at the mess.

"It doesn't look good."

"We've got the best Qulpari on the planet with us. I know we can fix this!"

I rolled my eyes at Gertie's optimism.

She walked to a bookcase, flipping through a hardback with a green cover. "I don't think Pete came here. He'd probably think this is boring."

Jamie got up, reading over her shoulder. "And you basically agreed to marry that kid?"

My sister shrugged indifferently, turning a page. "I talked with ET and my friends on the little computer thingy about it. They said that sometimes when there's no one available for you at Zaluxfa, and you get paired with the most differentist person, it is the bestest, most romantical relationship because you...learn the most, and, and, grow the most...learn how to..." She fumbled for the words. "Accept differences and learn how to make each other happy by being different yourself."

Jamie scrunched up her face. "`Differentist' isn't a word. Neither—"

"It is in Wumpaza. I was just...trying to explain it in English."

My girlfriend grabbed the book. "Can you even read this thing?"

Gertie nodded. "It's love poetry. The poet really likes his two partners and thinks they have very beautiful bodies and minds."

Jamie grimaced in disgust. "Gross."

"What's gross about it?"

"I don't want to think about ET and Spike in that way."

My sister took the book back, turning to the next page.

"You really are a Boofsuru."

The comment didn't seem to bother Gertie at all.

I approached the feathery one. "I've been meaning to ask...where's your third partner?"

"Watching our child."

She showed me a picture on the computer. Jamie took a look and made squee noises. "She's so cute!"

Yizewo smiled.

Spike talked to the Qulpari standing around for a few moments, then directed us down a corridor. "This way."

"What about ET?"

He checked outside. "He's still meditating. He can call us if he can't find us."

We trailed him down the back tunnel. Most of us, anyway. Yizewo said she didn't know much about water systems, and preferred to stay back and get to know the students that were hanging around.

A long gray tunnel with a low, rounded ceiling. Here and there they had skylights. A bit low, my hair brushed against the roof. Roy had to stoop like Big Bird squeezing through a school bus.

Gertie followed us, but still had her nose in the book.

"`Your body is slimy and squashy,'" Jamie mocked. "`I love your long bony arms, turtle face and neck that can get short and stretch really long.'"

Gertie turned a page. "They probably say the same thing about our romance poetry."

Jamie sighed. "You're probably right."

I glanced back. "ET must be really mad."

"He's meditating," Gertie said. "I'm sure he'll be fine."

The tunnel opened up into another domed room, this one containing a single Qulpari at a desk, with a couple chairs and tablet computers.

The stranger had neon green eyes, and rows of tiny horns sticking out of his eyebrow ridges and chin like a horned lizard. The moment we entered, he asked us if we were enrolling.

Gertie immediately said yes, but I stepped forward and blurted, "She's interested, but we're kinda busy right now."

"So we'd just like a tour," Jamie added.

Gertie gave me the same kind of frown she gave when signing up for her bracelet, you know, resenting me for meddling in her life.

"I thought you wanted to help these guys with the dead plants, you know, find out what's causing it."

She gave me a reluctant nod. "I am interested in this school, though."

Roy patted her on the back, looking a bit proud.

Lizard face smiled at my sister. "I will happily show you around our university. I think a unique species such as yourself will provide some enlightening conversations."

As he stood up, though, Spike said, "Show us your water system."

The bumpy faced enroller narrowed his eyes. "Why do you wish to see it?"

"Your fountains are full of sludge. I wish to help."

Horn Face led us down a stairwell, to a walkway along an underground river. "This is not the most scenic of places for an introductory tour, but we have the most modern of sewage filtration systems."

He pointed to a machine at a bend in the river, with pipes coming down into it from the ceiling, others running into various points on the walls. "An industrial Ubivice unit. Separates liquid and solid waste from water, converting it into clean fertilizer and useful chemicals. Our waterless, lubricant based haxgep units use a similar system. I suppose you know all about this, such is common knowledge..."

He scowled at the dark ooze pouring past the filter. "I...assume this is the sludge you refer to. There's a reason why we tell students not to dump chemicals into the haxgep."

"I don't think that's what happened. We have an enemy who despises the environment."

"Why would someone do such a terrible thing?"

"I believe he derived some sort of power from it. There are many ways to ruin nature for the sake of energy, especially if one is willing to resort to base savagery."

We followed the black ooze up the river. For awhile, we had the convenience of a sidewalk and overhead lights, but it soon came to an abrupt end.

The river continued from that point, gushing out the mouth of a low cave tunnel. Some lights had been set up around the tunnel, but we couldn't see that much, the water so dark we couldn't tell the black glop from water.

"Great," Jamie groaned. "Now what?"

Spike made his finger glow, waving it around the water, the end of the sidewalk.

His neck suddenly lengthened, finger pointing to a hole in the wall. "Heeere."

I leaned closer and spotted goop pouring through a rough sort of chute in the rock wall.

"Okay, so that's where it came from. How are we going to fix this?"

Crash! Bang! Boom! Black ooze gushed out the hole in a way that reminded me of a clogged drain catch being removed from a sink, but smelling of melted plastic and burning tires. Metal objects rained down, chunks of mystifying alien industrial equipment.

To my absolute shock, ET came flying down on one, as if tobogganing.

Upon splashing down, he called to us: "I broke Warkinde's machine, but it will not stop the damage done to—" his next words came out as a glub.

My alien friend tried to swim to us, but the moment his hand reached for the sidewalk, a thick tendril of oily slime slopped over him, dragging him below.

"ET!"