Short one, but hopefully a savory one. Start the fic.

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The birds were chirping, the children were playing, and Dipper and Pacifica were sitting at a park table playing chess.

"How long does it take for a request for a search warrant to go through? Seriously..."

"Quit whining, partner." Dipper moved his rook forward. "We aren't trying to search the ground for drugs or something simple like that, we believe that there is something of Gravity Falls level weird happening inside Northwest Industries and the amount of red tape that gets added on to that isn't anything to sneeze at."

Pacifica moved her bishop. "Alright fair enough. Hey, what's the score?"

"I've won fifty and you've got thirty, but you're quickly catching up."

Dipper moved his knight and took one of Pacifica's pawns.

"Hey Dipper, there's something that been bothering me." Pacifica moved her king.

"What's that Pacifica?"

Dipper moved his pawn forward.

"If there was a hole in the train car then how'd we move across it?"

"You mean you didn't realize?"

Flashback

"Okay, we're almost at the caboose! Just keep running slave!" ordered Baba Yaga.

Out of nowhere the lights started to flicker, Dipper and Baba Yaga stopped running, the lights went completely out. The lights shot back on and standing in front of them was Lenny.

"AAAAAAAAAAGH!" Baba Yaga screamed in unison.

"AAAAAAAAAAAGH!" screamed back Lenny.

"Wait, why are YOU screaming?!" asked Dipper.

"I... thought that was what we were doing."

"..."

"You know what?" asked Baba Yaga. "You're actually perfect."

Baba Yaga grabbed Lenny and shoved him down in to the hole. "There! Perfect bridge! Now come on slave, I have a child to eat!"

"NOOOOOOO! BEING PLUGGED IN A HOLE MY ONE-HEY! Don't tread on me!"

End Flashback

"I can't believe I didn't notice we ran on top of Lenny." confessed Pacifica. "Wait... is Lenny still on the train?"

"...You know what? I think he is!"

"Oh...Should we... rescue him?"

"He's always going on about how he wants to kill me and he can just pop back home anytime he wants. I'm sure he's fine."

The train...

Lenny was face down stuck in the hole doing nothing but watching the tracks go by as the train made its return trip home.

"...sigh... I hate you, Dipper. I want you to die."

Back with Dipper and Pacifica...

"Yeah, you're probably right." Pacifica took one of Dipper's knights.

"Well played. But are you ready for my new strategy?"

"No! Please, Dipper! Let's play something else! Something more fun! Like that other board game you showed me! You know the one with the dungeons and... dungeons!"

"Oh! You mean Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons!"

"Yes! That one! That one was so much fun!"

"Sorry Pacifica, but you know how carried away I get with that game. I'll lose a whole day to it if you let me and Mothman is due back at any second!"

"But that's what you've been saying for two hours! Can't we at least switch to checkers?"

"What? Checkers isn't anywhere near as stimulating as chess!"

"But Dipper..."

Dipper moved his knight.

"What?"

"No. Dipper, look up."

"Up? But I'm winning!"

"Just... look at me! Just for a second!"

"Well alright, but I don't see-WHA!"

Dipper nearly fell out of his chair, Pacifica was looking at him with a pleading cut look or as he liked to call it... "The Doe Eyes! You got me with both barrels! Okay, we'll play something else!"

"Great! But first..." Pacifica moved one of her pieces and took Dipper's queen. "Checkmate."

Dipper laughed at Pacifica's cleverness. "Pretty sneaky, partner!"

Before the board swap could begin a faint buzzing caught their attention. It didn't sound like it was coming from anywhere but it was getting louder.

"Pacifica! Above!"

Pacifica looked up just in time to see Mothman descending down upon them. She jumped out of the way just in time as the giant bug man landed on the table crushing their chess board.

"AAAAAAAGH!"

"Oh come on, Pacifica. You know me now! Is the screaming really necessary?" complained Mothman.

"Well maybe if you weren't about to land on my head I wouldn't feel the need to scream!" snapped Pacifica.

"Mothman," Dipper called. "Do you have news about our search warrants?"

"Yes... but you're not going to like it. Things are going slow. Real slow!"

"How slow are we talking here?" asked Dipper. "Like 'don't make any weekend plans' slow or..."

"The 'don't call us, we'll call you' kind of slow."

"Dang it!" swore Dipper.

"Sorry buddy, if I were you I'd find something time consuming to do. The General is doing his best to speed things up but Northwest Industries is on to us and well..."

"Let me guess," chimed in Pacifica. "My cousin is throwing money at the problem?"

"A whole lot of it."

Pacifica rolled her eyes. "Typical Northwest maneuver..."

"Wish I had better news for you but that's about it. I got to get back to base but good luck."

Mothman zoomed back up in to the sky becoming a distant little dot. Pacifica sat on the grass in defeat. "Terrific. Just terrific."

She laid down facing up at the blue sky. "Now what we do?"

Dipper laid down opposite of her upside down so his head was next to her. "Just be patient I guess..."

She turned to him. "You know, on that train adventure you really scared me."

"I scared myself!"

"Not just the obvious child-in-danger stuff, Dipper. That adventure made me face some things and... well... if something ever happened to you, like, you didn't come back...ever? I don't know what I'd do."

"Well I know exactly what I'd do if something ever happened to you." Dipper confessed.

"Really? I'm a little surprised you're prepared for that. What would you do?" asked Pacifica.

"I'd give it all up. The monster fighting, the cases, the RV, all of it! I'd hand in my badge and special gun and go work at Mabel's craft store as a cashier clerk for the rest of my boring days."

Pacifica sat up. "Wow Dipper. I don't know what to say to that."

"You don't have to 'say' anything, Sweetheart. That's just the way I feel."

Dipper continued to stare up at the sky but Pacifica gazed down at him with a loving smile.

"Hey," Pacifica stood in front of Dipper looking down at him with a confident grin. "I think its about time you and I went hat shopping!"

"What? Like now?"

"You got something better to do?"

"I... well, no..."

Dipper yelped when Pacifica grabbed him by his foot and started to drag him. "What is going on right now?!"

"If you're not going to move on your own then I'm going to move you for you! I will drag you to a good time!" teased Pacifica.

"Whoa! Okay, okay, I'm getting up!"

Haberdashery...

Dipper stood in front of a full length mirror as Pacifica entered the changing room with an armful of hats.

"Now I know you're dead set on a fedora but I thought maybe trying on some other type of hats might be fun too! What do you say?"

Dipper lowered his eyelids halfway and wore a defeated smile. "Sigh... Only for you, Sweetheart. Let's get started."

"Okay first up is this!"

Pacifica placed a fez on Dipper's head.

"How's this one feel to you?"

"It makes me feel like Grunkle Stan."

"So that's a maybe?"

"I guess..."

"Great! I'll start a 'maybe pile' with this and you can wear it on a day off for fun."

Pacifica took the fez off and tossed it aside.

"Dai oofff?"

"The joke's played out, Dipper. Next, try this beret! Straight from France~."

Pacifica placed a purple beret on his head.

"I think it looks Ooh la la!"

"I think it looks... not for me."

Dipper flung the hat the opposite side of the room from where the fez was.

"Maybe that would look better on me anyways. I do think I found something you'll like though!"

Pacifica put a blank blue trucker hat on his head.

"Hey!" Dipper grinned. "This does bring back some nostalgic feelings but..."

"Let me guess, the lack of a pine tree makes it feel..."

"Empty yeah... put it on to the 'maybe pile'."

Pacifica took off the trucker hat and placed it next to the fez.

"Okay, next we have the one I have personally been waiting for... the stetson."

"Fine. Bring it on."

She placed the stetson on his head and gave it an appraising look.

"I wouldn't say that's a 'bad' look for you but it is a little too cowboy I would think."

"I agree." Dipper knocked it off the top of hat over next to the beret.

"Well, enough beating around the bush then. Time for the fedora."

Dipper bit back a snappy dry comment.

Pacifica placed a brown fedora on his head.

"Now we're talking!" Dipper cheered.

"No."

"No? What are you talking about?! This is what I wanted from the beginning!"

"There's something... missing."

"What could be 'missing'?! A fedora isn't that complicated!"

"I don't know..." Pacifica mused. "Oh! Wait! I think I got it!"

Pacifica ran off leaving Dipper alone.

"Sigh. This is what I get for living with a fashionista. You'd think I'd learn by now what 'shopping' with her means."

Pacifica ran back in to the room carrying something which wasn't a hat.

"What this hat needs..." She placed the item on to the fedora. "Is a green band! A pine tree green band!"

The pine tree green band wrapped around the hat. The band certainly did make the hat stand out and Dipper smirked at how it looked on him.

"You know what? I like it! It feels natural!"

"Okay then, we have a winner!"

"Great! Let's head back to the RV then!"

"Right..."

Dipper headed to the cashier but Pacifica hung back for a second to pick up the fez and trucker hat.

"You never know!"

The RV...

Pacifica sat the table with a napkin tucked in to her shirt. She eagerly awaited for her meal which Dipper brought in inside of a cardboard box.

"Pizza is served!"

"Excellent! Now this is a middle class food I am quite experienced with! Ate it all the time as a kid and it was good Friday friend of mine up in the penthouse!"

"Never would have pegged you for a pizza lover, Pacifica."

Pacifica took a slice and took a bite out of it. "Get used to it! This girl is full of surprises!"

"Yeah, I'm starting to get that."

"About time, Mr. Detective!"

"Seriously though, Pacifica you've shown me that I can actually enjoy a Dai Oooff."

"Dipper, stop. You're not fooling anyone with you're mispronunciation; I mean look at me! I got around to calling 'Shar Ring' Shar Ring. I mean Sha Ring! OOPS, I mean Sha Ring! SHA RING! SHA RING! GRRRRRR! Why can't I say it?! What am I?! Twelve?!"

"Not so easy, is it?"

"Oh you shut up! I don't want to hear about it from YOU of all people!"

Dipper smirked. "You know, I really think you showed me the best side of yourself today."

"Oh?" A faint blush graced Pacifica's face. "What side would that be?"

"Your whimsical side. I know you like to portray yourself as this high society, sophisticated lady of class but I think I like you best when you're just trying to have fun!"

"Wow Dipper... I don't know what to say. I think..."

*KNOCK!**KNOCK!**KNOCK!*

"Oh you have GOT to be kidding me!" swore Pacifica. "Every time! Every time I try to have a moment with..."

Pacifica got up and headed to the door. "I swear, if this is my dad again I am going to kick him in the nuts!"

She opened the door and something brushed her aside, dashing inside.

"What the...?"

This new person stood in the middle of the room and struck a pose.

"Can you feel the love people?! Because the LOVE GOD is in the RV!"

Omake...

The train...

"Hello? Eyeball still stuck in the hole in the floor! Anybody want to let me out?"

The train had finally stopped moving but nobody had even noticed poor Lenny.

"Sigh... I wonder if anybody has figure out yet that I'm the eyeball that got ripped out of Bill Cipher's head by the T-Rex arm..."

That's it for now. That's right though, the character who was sitting with Jack Frost was none other than the Love God himself. Did you see it coming? More importantly did you see Lenny's secret origin coming? Let me know in the reviews!