"You're totally gawking."
Hinata ignores Ino and keeps her eyes to her book. Ino's applying her mascara and participating in the chatter in the halls before the homeroom bell rings. Hinata is leaning against her locker, trying her best to relax her forehead from her nerves.
Ino's right, but she won't give her that satisfaction. "You should study for the quiz." She mumbles instead, giving only occasional glances out of the corner of her eye in the direction of the roaring blond down the hall. He's laughing in the company of Sasuke and Sakura. They may share a homeroom, but she's never felt like she could join in. The trio was impenetrable - there was little room for anyone else to join the childhood best friends.
"Just go say hi." Ino urged after puckering her freshly applied lips. "You'll probably be the only one who wants to." Ino's right again, but it didn't mean Hinata wasn't ready to come to his defense. She always did and it was the easiest thing to poke fun of the Hyuuga - her unwavering compassion for the soccer star senior.
Her fingers lingered for a moment as she turned to the next page, trying to relax the muscles on her face from making her smile. Whatever Naruto was talking about, all she could focus on was his laugh and how it danced in her ears. It felt like a private concert, an undiscovered artist, her best kept secret. She could feel his warmth from afar and wished she could tame it and hold it tight.
"Soon," she says. She had to try. And after the test, she walks to his desk and asks him if he'd like to study with her.
He says yes. She absorbs his warm glow.
"And after college, we need to get an apartment-"
Sasuke is not addressing Sakura's daydreams. She's talking about prom, going to the same schools, living off campus…together. She's twirling the ideas of joint bank accounts ("Because if we're together, why do they have to be separate?" she insists), matching pajamas. Getting a cat, signing the lease in four months, meeting his older brother ("Why is he so busy!" - despite reminding her he's an overworked associate), getting on the same phone plan, scheduling classes at the same blocks.
"My mom said she'd co-sign it, and then we can go to my dad's store to get some starter furniture, too." She continues, not interested in double checking to see if he's even listening. He is, but he doesn't want to.
She'll study economics, and he can continue the analyst track, or anything, really, as long as he graduates in 3 years instead of four. She's not that picky. Study abroad in the Sand for a semester (together), come back, graduate, then get another cat - maybe foster some, then plan the wedding.
No more than 200 guests, in Konoha close to where they met. Everyone from their graduating class. She has Ino as her Maid of Honor, the bridesmaids dress a pearly peach, no sleeves, a small slit on the left side. Spring time, maybe around April before the rain season begins. They'll honeymoon in the Land of Earth, learn rock climbing to prepare. She's adamant about the two of them beating the highest climb together so they can break a record ("It'll be so romantic to tell our kids").
They'll buy a single family home in the best school district of Konoha. The walls will be a faint white - more ivory than seashell, and they'll remodel the bathroom every three years.
"As long as we stick to the plan, we'll have our second kid by 35." She's beaming, drawing circles on the back of her quiz and accepting his silence as complete agreement. He's gnawing at the inside of his cheek and briefly winces when he tastes blood.
"Sasuke, you're bleeding." Sakura deadpans, eyes softening with concern.
These were the moments he believed she cared for him. But that thought immediately bursts the moment she resumes defining and setting in stone his fate to her. Permanence. It didn't feel like a life of choice, it felt like an obligation to make sure Sakura was happy. A quest he had to complete, that he couldn't avoid, and that was his destiny to an unhappy life.
And as she continues, he moves his attention to the soft spoken Hyuuga approaching his best friend who's sitting two seats in front of him. He never thought he'd see her exit her comfort zone for anyone, let alone Naruto.
He could never tell anyone (especially his girlfriend who he's been pulled along by since grade seven), but he's always found his lingering eyes on the quiet girl. Maybe it was a crush, or a dream of wanting to make his own choice. Maybe he just daydreamed of a girl that didn't crush his spirits, his dreams, or at least would have let him conceive his own. She seemed like the type that encouraged you, not dragged you with her. Maybe it was simply the illusion of free will.
"Oh yeah, go Hinata!" Sakura grins and cheers from afar. It's a good thing neither Hinata nor Naruto heard. Sakura was never good about being discreet. "You know, she's liked him since forever."
Sasuke nods, not saying anything, just poking the new wound with the tip of his tongue. The itch distracted him from the pulsing ache he felt in his chest. He, in fact, did not know that, but should have known better. He was always hoping she was looking at him, too. Maybe he thought he was everyone's crush, he mentally realizes.
Everyone else with half a brain cell would know Hinata liked Naruto. She did very little to hide it. But for her to talk to him at school surrounded by everyone was just not something he expected to see, especially as the final weeks of school were wrapping up.
"Maybe one day our kids will be best friends with theirs." Sakura sighed, turning back to forcing her fingers into his loose palm. "We should go on a double date, too."
"No." He could voice his opposition only now, because he didn't filter it out in time. Normally, Sasuke did little to fight against his girlfriend. She was hard headed and could fight for hours if given the chance. It also didn't satisfy him to hurt her feelings, which were very fragile if he made any obvious indication that he didn't like her as much as she loved him. Even though it was clear that he didn't love her in the same capacity, he couldn't bring himself to break one of his closest friend's hearts, especially before graduation.
The dreams Sakura carved have only made Sasuke dread walking the stage. Everything involved what she wanted and she never once asked whether he felt the same or asked if he wanted something else. It was bad enough wanting to think for himself, but he also had to consider if disagreeing was worth a fight with her.
"But Sasu," she whined, fingers now playing with his uniform collar. "He's our best friend. We have to be welcoming."
And before he has a chance to respond, he just stares as Naruto take Hinata's hand and announces to their class his prom date. She turns red as their classmates cheer, and all Sasuke wants to do is leave.
If he had a backbone to defy Sakura's wishes, maybe he would've broken things off and asked her first. Maybe he could have dreamt of all the mundane life experiences like Sakura had of him.
Sasuke would come to regret his inability to end things soon after.
She would be lying if that message wasn't still replaying in her mind. The same way a note from Naruto in 12th grade once did. Toes curling, the heat that just wouldn't cool down from her cheeks no matter how hard she pressed water bottles against it. Even while home and away from any peering eyes, she felt seen, as though her reaction was being observed by others.
She wants to believe it was an accident, because she couldn't find a single universe where it doesn't cost her losing Sakura in her life. There is no way this message was meant for her. For Hinata? No, Sasuke would never do that. Not intentionally, anyway. He's Naruto's best friend, and her friend's ex.
Even though it's been five minutes since she opened it, a part of her wants to see what it means. At least, to clarify before anything could escalate. She couldn't accept this as the truth, there had to have been a reason for it.
Edging on the cautionary side, she replies, Is that a bad thing?
The message sent in green. She sighs, accepting that she can't take her words back. She hopes it was a mistake. Contrary to the heat on her cheeks, it had to be.
40 texts, 7 voicemails, 20 FaceTime calls notifications, and even 2 colorful emails, Sasuke eventually woke up to the alerts from his charging phone. Well, he woke up again. The first time was around 3:15 in the morning when he ran down the hall to throw up everything left in his stomach. He then showered, made a black coffee, and slid back on his couch for what he swore was only for 20 minutes.
After the 21st call, he picked up to hear Sakura yelling. The recital. Of course, he would be suffering from a hangover the night of his 5 year old's first dance.
"Don't forget the fucking camera, idiot!" She said curtly before hanging up. Choosing to accept that he did in fact almost ruin the chance to have any record of memories of his daughter, Sasuke swiftly grabbed his compact camera and took a cab to her school.
"How am I here before you?" Itachi grinned, tapping the chair to his left. Kisame is snickering and Sasuke rolled his eyes. He wasn't in the mood to entertain his older brother.
"Pinky's pissed." Kisame laughed, pointing to his ex-wife holding a bouquet of flowers. He quickly made out that Hinata was on her knees, adjusting the ruffles of Kazumi's skirt next to Sakura. Kazumi catches his stare and waves with a Hinata gently telling her to hold still.
"Long night." He finally grumbles, still staring as Hinata smiled at his daughter. It wasn't weird to look too long considering Kazumi was there. He waves back causing Kazumi to beam.
"Get the camera ready. Looks like the lights are dimming."
Sasuke nodded absentmindedly, getting up from his seat for the aisle. The last thing he needed was for Sakura to ring him for his poor videographer skills, too.
He starts recording, starting with Hinata quickly giving Kazumi a quick hug before she ran behind the curtains. And as the soft music erupted from the piano, the curtains were pulled and his daughter's class began to take their steps to their routine.
His eyes soften as Kazumi makes her debut on the stage, twirling with her classmates and cheeks a pink as her dress. Camera still facing the stage, he turned to see Sakura with proud tears forming and Hinata softly holding her hands against her chest with a smile.
He felt selfish for wanting to see her. If his under the influence texts said nothing else, they clearly painted the picture of a conversation.
After the recital ended, Sasuke came back with his daughter in his arms as she excitedly explained how much she loved her dress. "Auntie Hina made it." She blabbled on as he approached the rest of the attendees.
"She did? Tell her thank you." He replied making a childish face of shock to his daughter before looking at Hinata. She had such a soft smile, but he could see how flushed she looked.
"Seriously Hinata, you saved the day with the dress!" Sakura beamed as she took her daughter into her arms. "You did great, honey!"
And it felt like the sounds drowned out as he shifted in his shoes, unable to take his eyes off the dark haired woman. She was avoiding meeting his eyes and it bothered him somehow. It didn't matter how loud his brother-in-law Kisame was laughing, nor the claps from his older brother to the elated Kazumi who was adoring all the praise. The feeling of just focusing on the mute Hyuuga - Uzumaki - felt easier to do.
"Ne, Sasuke, can you bring the car seat to Hinata's car? I took a cab here. She's taking me home."
He nods, acknowledging his ex-wife and gestures to Hinata to lead the way to the parking lot. He was appreciative of the break that allowed him to step away from all the sounds, and it appeared she was as well.
It makes him nervous to be alone with her. It's happened before, but he's somehow convinced himself that he should feel like a terrible person for wanting the chance to be in her company without another person, whether it be their kids or friends. But the chances were getting slimmer of being in her company appropriately and he would take whatever he could.
"I didn't know you were making her dress." He says to break the silence. Despite the school halls being small, it dragged on like an endless tunnel. He was in no hurry to get to his car and she appeared to be matching his pace so as to not rush him.
She released her bottom lip and nodded. "Sakura asked me a couple weeks ago. Kazumi did so well." She softly smiled, still staring ahead.
"Thank you for making her so happy." He hoped she understood that he meant his daughter, not really caring how Sakura felt about all of it. He's learned to feel a little avaricious and to only embrace anything to deal with his growing child. At least, best advice Itachi ever gave him.
"I think you coming made her happier." She teased. It was like whatever tension existed briefly disappeared. "And it's nice to be around a little girl. I'm living vicariously through you both."
"Then maybe we could switch kids." He said dryly, his sarcasm light.
"Mm, maybe. I'll ask his dad." She sighed, going silent for a couple of seconds. His back was turned to her as he was unbuckling the seat. "Um, Sasuke. Can I ask you something?"
He unlocked his car and was midway removing the purple car seat from the back of his car when he paused to turn to the Hyuuga behind him. She had a worried look on her face, almost pensive.
"What is it?"
"Last night…did you mean to text me that?"
She felt like she was sliding in her sneakers from nerves. The man had paused and stared at her, his gaze making her feel like she was melting into the ground. She knew she shouldn't have brought it up, but her therapist has repeatedly told her to speak up and this was as good of a time as any.
"Because, I didn't think it was meant for me, and I didn't want you to think the person it was intended for had received it if I got it instead. So, I just wanted to make sure you knew who received it." She babbled on, feeling her cheeks burn. She was thankful it was dark outside and the street lights were so dim.
"Oh, that." It was hard to tell on his face, but she was unsure if he looked disappointed in her reaction, or flattered she had brought it up first.
"It was for you." He said blankly, as he pressed the seat belt button to unstrap the chair. He pulls the chair out and turns to hand it to her. Their fingers touch, but neither pull away.
"Oh." It's all she can say, and she's nodding slowly but looking down at the small crumbs between the chair cushion. "Alright. That's…nice."
He frowns slightly. "It was just about Naruto. Don't overthink it."
She looks up, partially out of relief, but internally disillusioned. "Right, that makes sense." She nods, accepting that her eagerness at the idea of Sasuke being interested in her was plain nonsense. "I appreciate your kindness." She softly says.
She pulls away clumsily, already missing his warmth.
"Thank you for the ride, Hina." Sakura sighs quietly. Kazumi is fast asleep and the ride to her house is delayed suddenly by the road construction. "It took Sasuke forever, I swear I didn't think he'd make it."
Hinata nods absentmindedly but felt her grip tighten on the steering wheel at the mention of him. Sakura didn't notice. Even with her foot gradually decreasing the speed to follow the flow of traffic, she couldn't wait to be alone. "Kazumi was elated."
Sakura turned on the camera to replay the clips of the evening. The way her daughter shined on the stage, the various angles of her dances, she didn't feel bad yelling at Sasuke to get it right because the pressure definitely worked. "I can't wait to show Sai this." She whispered excitedly, skipping around the recordings. She was planning on talking to Sasuke about the introduction process now that things felt more serious between them.
Her eyebrow raised when she noticed how much of the video panned to Hinata randomly. Before the dance started, there were shots of Hinata adjusting the skirt of the dress with Kazumi, then her in the crowd staring at the stage here and there. I guess that didn't surprise her as much given Hinata was sitting in the same row as her, Itachi and Kisame, but walking up to the group after the show still had the camera focused on Hinata.
"Sasuke needs to edit this." She laughed quietly. "I see more of you than me here."
"Oh." Hinata nodded. "I must've been in the way."
"Ms. Hyuuga, here's the Complaint draft. Though discovery is in the works, it's informal at its current stage so there are no harsh deadlines. Once this is filed, though, it will officially become public with the Court."
Itachi gestured to the neatly stacked paperclipped documents at the center of his desk. "It's best we file before they do, but knowing your husband, he probably won't. I'd suggest you mark it up in case we missed anything, but I trust you'll find it to your preference. I understand this is a difficult time, but hope we addressed all of your concerns while also taking the moral high ground." She could hear the sarcasm towards the end, and nodded absentmindedly. She understood that Naruto was difficult, but didn't want to jeopardize the remaining aspects of her relationship with the father of her son.
"Karin will take you to the other room so you can read it over. If you have any concerns, just flag it with one of the tabs in that office and we'll make any necessary changes. Assuming there are minimal corrections, we'll then need you to sign with your seal. Do you have any questions so far?"
He continued. "We'll just object to everything right now regarding discovery and move forward with the Complaint. So you are aware, the Complaint is detailed with other information some of my assistants were able to obtain online. But again, it is your decision what we file with the Court and will not do so without your approval. I just want to warn you of the contents of that material."
After a few more exchanges, she was guided to a smaller room to review the legal document. She scanned over the words her attorney wrote, based on what she felt from their prior meetings.
Plaintiff discovered Defendant engaging in sexual relations with someone in their home.
Plaintiff alleges that Defendant was an absent husband, and would rarely participate or become involved in their domestic relationship.
Plaintiff maintains that Defendant rarely engaged in any sexual relations with her since she became pregnant of their son, Souta.
Plaintiff alleges that since the birth of their son, Souta, Plaintiff has not had the opportunity to complete her education, nor seek employment without Defendant obligating her to maintain their home life, including caring for their son full-time.
Defendant's financial control of Plaintiff has made Plaintiff unable to provide for herself and her son without his monetary support.
She felt the heaviness in her stomach as she read the second to last paragraph, likely what Itachi meant by his staff researching beyond what she already provided.
Plaintiff alleges that Defendant has likely committed adultery more than once. It has come to the attention of Plaintiff that Defendant used social media profiles to engage in sexual relations with potentially other sexual partners. Until discovery is exchanged, there is no proof as to when Defendant's account was created. See Exhibit 2, screenshot of Defendant's dating profile.
She flipped the page and saw her husband, half naked, in a bathroom she recognized. The bathroom of the restaurant from one of their last dinner reservations before she found him with that woman. She could almost pinpoint the date, because it was definitely before she saw him fucking someone else. The wallpaper was so recognizable - a distinct pattern only this chain would have. She was sure if she Googled it, she could match it. Royal blue, gold lines.
The light stubble on his chin - he almost never let it grow but that week, he was too lazy to do it. The shirt was unbuttoned, white with thin, blue vertical stripes. He met her at the restaurant right after work and already buzzed. It was a long day, he told her. Not long enough for him to seek sex from strangers, though.
Not from his wife.
What else could she feel but rage? He didn't even try to get her back, even then. Even before he got caught. She worked so hard to lose the baby weight. Addicted to counting every calorie, maximizing all of the baby naps she could to silently follow video workouts from home. She took care of her skin, she maintained her hair, she did everything she could within her reach to be who she was before giving birth. She suffered silently to recreate the image he had before the stretch marks, the swollen ankles, the constant wardrobe changes to fit her new skin.
It wasn't that she didn't appreciate her body then. She knew she was creating a safe home for her son before his birth. It was ensuring she could keep her husband happy, too that was the hardest part. She learned it from her father, her entire family (sans her only sane cousin), and none of it was still enough.
It mattered little to him the effort she put into finding the restaurant, ordering the perfect dress in the smallest size she had ever been. That date was so important to her. She wanted to get his attention, please her husband. Feel like her old self. Get him back, because she already sensed she was losing him. She just didn't know he was already gone.
And he was looking for someone else. Anyone else. Not her.
Not his wife.
She wanted to scream. She felt the anger run through her hands as she frantically grabbed her phone and texted the only person who could understand how she felt.
He had a profile before I caught him.
"Sasuke, you got a minute?" He came by to get his carseat back from the prior weekend. He nods, despite feeling his phone vibrate. He'd get it later.
"Can you edit some of the video footage from the recital? I want to prepare a video to send to my parents." She says as she grabs the equipment from her hallway closet.
"Yeah, I can do that this weekend."
"I saw some of it. Seems like your little school crush is still there." She teased, handing the camera to him.
He arched a brow, confused. "I don't follow."
"I saw more Hinata than our kid." She laughed, arms crossed. "I promise, I'm over you. But I just noticed she's in it more than anyone else."
He doesn't say anything, just hoping his ex-wife would get to the point. "Anyway, I think you should give her some space in case she works stuff out with Naruto. I may be cool with it, but I don't think he is."
"I still don't know what you're talking about."
Deny, deny, deny. The best Uchiha quality he inherited - the ultimate dismissal of the truth. ]
"Sure." She laughs. "Since you're dealing with that, I want to bring Sai around Kazumi soon. Is that alright?"
"That's fine." He refuses to address the first part of her response, hoping to just skip over his ex's sudden interest and scarily accurate observations of him. "I'll get going-"
"Geez, Sasuke, lighten up! Five years ago I would've hexed you. You totally should if you want to. And as your ex and friend, I truly mean that."
He rolls his eyes. "Goodnight, Sakura."
After getting the car seat set up again, he feels his phone vibrate once he's about to reverse out of the parking spot. It's Hinata.
"Hey-"
Sobs. All he could hear were hiccups and words meshed together. All he could feel was her pain, her voice shrinking with every attempt to say what she wanted.
"Hey. Slow down." He tried to comfort the crying woman and could tell she was doing her best to make sure no one else could hear her wallow. "Where are you? Do you want me to get you?"
"Please."
"Wait for me."
A/N: This story is also uploaded to AO3 (and, uploaded there first) so apologies for delay! I'm same username there, too. Thanks for the love. This chapter is not the best but I hope to keep the story in direction I want it to be, soon. :) Reviews and comments if you enjoy are appreciated!