A/N: This is my first ever fan-fiction for one of my favorite TV shows of all time. I've never ventured much into writing stories; other than the ones I was ever assigned in school. Still, after beginning my rewatch of the show, I decided to be inspired by the one and only Richard Castle to take a gamble and write my very first fic. I have plans for multiple ones but this one struck me today of all days. I plan on keeping this going for a good little while, expanding on different ideas that the show could've explored and one of the first ones that came to mind was Rick's quite skilled marksmanship with a pistol, but it doesn't seem to come up in the show much after that. This one will take place shortly after the episode "Countdown."

So, without further ado, let's get this show on the road!

Chapter 1

A hollow feeling in her bones, cold seeping in every nook and cranny conceivable. Death's cool hand slowly draped itself around her, pulling her down, down.

Eyelids trying in vain to stay open as the ice threatened to form a film over her sight. Vision blurring, and glimpses of icicles on the ceiling and red crystals on the floor.

A body, no, not hers,

Not his. Whose?

She shifted her head to look around but couldn't, as if already frozen into place, but she could move her eyes at least. Although she was so very cold, she could feel the slight warmth coming from the man who had her in his arms, keeping her safe, and fending off the wishes of Death, bidding her to close her eyes and rest.

Finally, she could see his face, covered in ice formations all over, nearly seared shut were his eyes from the ice that formed around the lashes, but the light that usually possessed the cobalt blues that stared back at her was oh so dim. Her eyes widened as she started to be able to garner the most basic of motor control, willing her arm to lift from her lap and to the side of his face that rested upon her head.

Her voice rasped out with teeth chattering, just barely a decibel over what could be registered as a whisper,

"C-c-castle?"

But there was no answer, her eyes darting back and forth between his quickly closing eyes, tears threatening to form around her field of vision as she started to shake him awake. In her moment of desperation, her voice started to return to at least half power and she shouted his name, trying to bring him back. Begging him to keep his eyes open, refusing to let them close and leave her.

But all she did resulted in nothing accomplished, as she continued her ministrations, she felt the arm that was wrapped around her go slack and fall down her backside, she couldn't scream, couldn't cry because that meant the temperature would gloss her eyes over and cause even more pain that what she could bear right now, she silently hoped that he had just succumbed to the cold and fell prey to unconsciousness, but as she maneuvered her shivering hand to check his pulse, she felt nothing.

He was gone.

She wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all, before anything could be said, before she could confess a truth to him that she would've guarded a long time unless something like this were to happen, and at this moment, her words simply failed her and only simple actions could suffice to speak for her.

So she cradled his head between both of her hands and tugged him to her shoulder, silently begging him to wake up, make an ill-timed joke, anything she would take, as long as it meant she would hear his voice again. But nothing came, the only sound being made was the whirring of the freezer that kicked into gear as she silently sobbed at the great loss she felt.

All she could muster was the most important words that she had failed to tell him before he had left her.

"I lov- "

And in that moment, she jolted awake, frantically searching for him, but not seeing him anywhere. She wasn't in the freezer anymore, she was home, wrapped in her covers. Although she knew now that it was a dream, the pangs that she had felt from the dream still very much remained, so there was no way that she could go back to bed now, she knew if she did, the dreams would come back and be more haunting than that one.

With a sigh that quivered a bit too much for her liking, Kate Beckett swung her legs out from underneath the covers and made her way to the bathroom, stopping only for a brief moment to pull on a robe over her clothes and house slippers onto her feet. Although she wasn't cold, she would swear that she still felt the chill that was lingering on her skin from three days ago.

She hadn't been expecting much out of the ordinary as she got into the bathroom, she knew her face had felt a bit taut but she didn't think much of it until she had looked in the mirror and saw the tear tracks that had been left by her nighttime throes. Well, that certainly wasn't expected of her, she usually only had such strong feelings in her dreams when she saw the alley where her mother was killed, or thinking back on such happy memories that she still tried her best to cherish that now no longer could be made in the present or future. But as of recently, she had been plagued with dreams of him, and all the regrets and close calls that the two shared. Of course, they never ended badly out of her mind's playground, but after years of being a homicide detective, the mind could easily supply how things could have gone for Rick or herself. The big two before three days ago were Dick Coonan and Jerry Tyson killing Castle before either being shot to death in the precinct or escaping into the night to never be caught again.

Good lord, she was a mess. She had never had dreams like this with the other men in her life; Will, Demming, or even Josh. She had worked cases with the first two, but the fear of loss was never as great as it was when it was Castle being removed from her life. She shook her head as if to remove the thoughts from her mind as she discarded her clothes, turned the faucet on, and prepared herself for her morning shower, hoping the routine would cleanse her mind.

The water had been a notch under scalding her skin, but she truthfully needed the distraction, and she definitely would be doing just that after the shower as she drank her morning coffee and had some breakfast. As she scrubbed the soap down her body, she started stringing together some plans for what she could do this morning after she had knocked out those first two. It was five in the morning after all, she had a little bit of time to kill before going to work, and she was sure that there wasn't going to be a body drop between now and eight.

As she stepped out of the shower, she dried herself off and wrapped the robe back around her and the slippers back on her feet, no way she was going to let this warm feeling slip away so quickly, especially not before she had her coffee.

Ugh, coffee

It never held much of a significant meaning before, but that was before Castle would bring her coffee every morning. So much for trying not to think about him this morning, at least those memories weren't tainted in any way, ones that she could smile about. As she was lost in her thoughts, her hands wandered out of repeated actions and mindlessly started brewing her coffee as she rummaged through the fridge, looking for something to eat.

Once again bombarded by thoughts of Castle as she had remembered his words when he had been over helping organize the fundraiser for her mother's scholarship,

"It's like a Styrofoam temple you've constructed in here, Beckett."

She, of course, had deflected when he had commented, but in the usual banter way that the two of them talked. But now she exhaled through her nose quite forcefully with a toothless smile on her lips as she had thought about how right he was, but she still reached in and retrieved a takeout box from one of their favorite Chinese restaurants that was close to the precinct, and warmed it up. Just as her breakfast had finished heating up, her coffee had finished brewing, so now everything was falling into place for her morning. She snatched up her now heated-up food and cradled the ceramic coffee mug in one hand that Castle had gotten her, with the cheesiest line that he could've possibly put on there, 'World's Greatest Detective,' but it was a nice sentiment.

Eyeing the couch, she decided that she was going to have breakfast with some entertainment, so she gracefully walked over and deposited herself on the couch, she flicked the remote onto the TV and watched as it lit up and started playing Temptation Lane, the TV probably knew by this point that it was her ideal comfort show, so no surprise there. It was one of the more humorous episodes, so she was more than happy to leave it on for a mood boost for the day. Of course, the instant that she had finished her food and coffee, her phone began to ring, and naturally, her head drooped down and she groaned.

"So much for having a little bit of me time before work."

She hoisted herself up out of the couch and walked to the kitchen island where her phone lay from the previous night. Before she answered, she glanced at the time and realized it was closer to 8 than she had realized, so she couldn't necessarily be too upset. The caller ID showed it was Esposito so she already knew it was a body drop, dropping her contentedness from being at home, the Detective Kate Beckett façade was put in place and she pressed the accept button and brought the phone to her ear.

"Beckett."

"Morning boss"

"Morning Espo, where are we going today?"

"Park Avenue and East 57th, Ritz Tower, up on the 10th floor."

She sighed as she had already started gathering up her clothes to get ready to make her way to the scene, "Sounds good, be there in 15, gotta pick up writer boy."

"You got it, boss, we'll hold it down over here, CSU is about to finish up now."

"Thanks, Espo, see you in a bit."

She finally had an excuse to call him, although she would admit, felt bad that it was a dead body that caused it, but she would take what she could get. Because she didn't know where they stood after the freezer and the bomb, especially after he had tried to say something at the end of that case, but was stopped short by Josh's sudden appearance. She hated that that was his reaction, to run away, but then again, she had created the situation hadn't she? She tried to calm herself as she scrolled to his number, and as soon as the first ring went through, she was all good. She knew he never answered on the first couple of rings, it was usually the fifth ring that got him awake so she wasn't surprised that he didn't answer immediately.

However, there was never an answer, and it went straight to voicemail, which she thought was weird, he rarely ever dodged her calls. So, she tried to call him once again, but the same result was achieved, and with a furrow of her brow thinking of what reason he would have to be dodging calls, she came up dry, well, not too dry, but she pushed that thought to the back of her head. Since he wasn't answering, she decided to leave a message that they had a body, but she left that detail at the very end after she had asked him to call her back, with a slight waiver of her voice.

That. That she hated, and she knew he would pick up on it. He was a writer for pete's sake, and he had made it his mission in his works that the devil is in the details, and oh boy, did he have a clue as to what that little vocal inflection meant before she hung up. Standing in her doorway out of her apartment, she had just pinched the bridge of her nose as she was just working herself up and doing no favors for her nerves right now, especially since she needed to be razor-sharp focused so she could close this case and grant some answers to those left behind by the victim.

After pulling on her heels, she nabbed her badge, gun, and keys as she headed out the door and down to her cruiser to make her way to the scene. She almost started absentmindedly driving towards Castle's loft but shook herself back to consciousness and adjusted her path to the scene, but the thought of not having her shadow with her in the corner of her eye was a weird feeling, especially when she usually had to smack at his hands when they had wandered to mess with the radio. Of course, he had made the excuse of,

"Come on Beckett, we need to have the proper entrance music when we pull up to the scene, gotta show them we mean business," which he, of course, finished with a wink.

Instead of laughing at the time, she just gave him the patented Beckett glare, but there was no conviction behind it, and she was sure that he knew but gave no sign to confirm or deny his suspicions. But before she knew it, she was pulling into a parking spot that was close to the medical examiner's van and making her way to the building's entrance. As she was walking up, she noticed both Ryan and Esposito standing at the entrance with… what was that expression?

She started walking a bit faster because she needed to know what was going on between the two of them, it was unlike them to be waiting that far away from the crime scene, so she was already not liking the way that they were presenting themselves. They were both, almost unnoticedly, shifting from foot to foot, a very clear sign of being nervous. There were also their faces, which gave nothing away, like they were carved out of stone, but not with the matching thousand-yard stare, more of a brief shock that flickered across their faces when they saw her approaching.

As she stopped in front of them, she narrowed her eyes as they darted between the two of them, conveying her suspicions of the two as eagerly as she could, but before she could address either of them, Ryan piped up providing some information about what was going on upstairs.

"Morning Beckett, we got a… bit of a weird one."

He was clearly avoiding her eyes as she, not necessarily staring him down, but more like, willing the information out of him.

"CSU had just finished up, and they found two different blood types in the room, one that matched our guy, and one that didn't."

Beckett finally took her opportunity to speak since she had a direction to go now,

"So, there was someone in the room with our vic, any matches in any systems?"

Esposito took the mantle from Ryan and now started to lay out some more information for her,

"Yeah, yeah, we got a match… Beckett, it's Castle's blood."

Castle? Blood? Castle's blood? No, no, no, not after… well, what? There wasn't anything that they did, nothing was admitted in that freezer or in front of the bomb, just a silent admission in her heart that she knew for at least some time, existed. But, if he was bleeding, how bad was he hurt? Where was he? Would she see the mirth that plagued the eyes that she would catch staring at her as she filled out paperwork again?

Apparently, she had been out of it for quite some time, judging by the way both Espo and Ryan were attempting to get her to "wake up," and eventually she did snap out of it, closing her eyes allowed her to push her emotions down and get her mind in gear so she could find her partner before anything truly terrible happened, if it hadn't already happened upstairs.

"Yo Beckett!" Esposito was now snapping his fingers in front of her face, trying to get her to respond, which did eventually work as Beckett's once-open mouth had now shut and left nothing but a steeled look on her face.

"How do we know it's his?" She hoped that her voice didn't quiver too much but she pressed on as the trio cleared the lobby and made their way up the elevator to the scene.

Ryan turned his head just enough to half glance at her before he started.

"Remember when he signed those papers, essentially signing himself over to the NYPD?"

Kate just simply nodded, remembering asking the lawyer if she had to wait until he was done to shoot him or if she could do it now. The moment was just a jab at him, but now she was reflecting on some of the things she had said to him over the years and hoped she had a chance to keep making them, but not without a few other things she needed to voice.

"Well apparently, that whole system also warranted doing bloodwork on him, fingerprinting, the works."

At his finished sentence, Esposito turned around.

"So, since CSU has NYPD bloodwork on scene, they were able to figure it out pretty quick, and we're still trying to wrap our heads around it."

As if on cue, the elevator dinged and the doors opened to flood into a hallway that extended in both directions, but all the officers and crime scene tape were just to the right of the elevators on the opposite wall. The trio made it through the impromptu barricade and into the crime scene to assess the situation.

The scene looked like something straight out of an action movie, the aftermath of a great big shootout, with the exception being the bullets that plagued the walls and tore through the mattress and pillows, decorating the room with feathers and pieces of drywall everywhere, were coming from one direction, directly through the windows that looked out to the city below. Kate walked into the living room where Lanie was posted up, examining the body that had very violently been launched into the wall and was now hunched over.

Kate squatted down and looked at the man, who had to have been in his late sixties with mixed brown and white hair with a well-dressed suit, and an added flourish of dark red at the center of his chest, no doubt the killing blow.

As Kate crouched down next to her, Lanie slowly slid her eyes up from the clipboard with the necessary information for the ME's office and assessed the detective. Knowing that this case was hitting a little too close to home already, the good doctor waited her out, as she watched the detective's eyes dart around the room as she took in all the damage that happened, no doubt, thinking that there was no way that Castle made it out with less than just a graze, but the blood that had been sprayed against the wall within ten feet of their vic, spoke differently than her thoughts. There wasn't nearly enough blood for it to have been a vital hit, but her imagination was running wild until Lanie had removed a glove from her hand and placed it on Kate's knee, hoping to offer some form of support.

Before she had a chance to open her mouth, Kate's eyes had stopped wandering around the room and looked head-on at Lanie, with fiery determination in her eyes.

"What do we got Lanie?" The quiver that had been her voice was now less present than before, now that she had the reassurance of looking at the crime scene herself. After all, she liked to investigate things for herself, it provided a sense of security and assurances that nobody else but her mind could provide her after looking at the facts.

Lanie had thought about bringing up the elephant in the room but had decided against it, opting to give all the evidence that she could to Kate so that they could get their favorite writer back safe and sound.

"Our vic's name is Michael Smith, prime age of 64, and an upstanding citizen doing his part being a lawyer. The boys found his wallet tossed off his bed, no doubt by the gunfire."

Now re-gloved, Lanie pulled open the dead man's suit jacket to show the full display of red that had spread thoroughly across the dress shirt. "Preliminary examination suggests that the shot to his chest was definitely our C.O.D. But I'll be able to give you some more after I take him down to the morgue."

Kate had just silently nodded as Lanie had explained it to her, allowing her mind to shoot off in all avenues of investigation she could take with just that little information, but now it was time to prod and figure out more.

"Do we have any idea where the shooters fired from?"

At her question, Esposito cleared his throat as he gestured towards the windows, "Whoever these guys were? They were pros, no question." Kate had now joined him at the now shattered windows, looking out at the city below, and all the buildings nearby at eye-level.

"The only location that would give them the kind of angle they needed to light this place up like a Christmas tree," Esposito then pointed at an adjacent building that stopped at the 9th floor, granting a great shooting range from there into the room, "is from there." Kate turned to face him with her mouth open, a question forming on her tongue, but Esposito held up a hand to stop her, "We already got uni's over there, they found brass casings from our shooters, and they aren't your garden variety artillery Beckett." At her raised eyebrows, he placed on what he thought was the best poker face he had, but based on her looks at him, he was failing. So, in for a penny, in for a pound. She already knows Castle was in this room for some reason, might as well break the news now rather than later.

"The casings suggest a larger caliber weapon, probably a marksman rifle, but the ammunition is military-grade boss, whoever was gunning for this guy was taking no chances at all, he didn't want any survivors."

A/N: Wow! Didn't realize I had that in me, now that we are caught up with what's going on with Kate and the boys, we're gonna be shifting gears to a few days prior, leading up to the events, mostly from Castle's perspective and how he wound up with our favorite mystery man from S4. Hope you enjoyed it and leave some reviews! I need that constructive feedback and it's appreciated since this is my first outing, and hopefully, I don't get too off track with the characters and make them too OOC, except for the obvious AU angle I'm shooting for haha. Until the next chapter!