A/N

So this is non-canon fiction that starts just after Brendan has sacked Ste when he gets out of prison. There will be a few time-jumps in it but that will be made clear.

It's going to follow the bones of the show, with the deli, walker wanting revenge and all that, but with some obvious changes. one being that Doug isn't gay and he and set are just friends, and some things happening earlier than they did in the show etc.

if i haven't specifically addressed or re-written something in here, just assume it happened as per the show.

rated M

Trigger warnings for the story:

non consent / rape

talk of child abuse

mental health struggle

self harm / suicide

also a slight warning for everyone, this centres completely around the stendan relationship and their angst, but when it comes to Smut, theres very little between them, but there will be scenes between them and others!

Chapter 1 -

The sunlight streaming through the crack in his curtains was what woke him, shortly followed but the sounds of small children chatting and messing around in the bathroom. For a few seconds he thought about pulling the pillow over his head and drifting off back to sleep, it was far too early to be awake when he worked nights. except he didn't work nights, not anymore, that realisation hit him like a freight train, he was once again an unemployed father of two. He let out a long sigh and flung his legs off the side of the bed, sitting for a few seconds to pull himself together before he opened his bedroom door and made his way to the bathroom.

"Daddy!" Leah and Lucas shouted in unison.

'Morning trouble" he croaked sleepily as he ruffled Lucas' hair and picked up the toothpaste tube Leah had dropped on the floor.

"Sorry, i did tell them to keep it down, didn't want them to wake you" Amy appeared at the doorway looking sheepish.

"why? not like i need a lie in or anything is it? and i need to get looking for another job today" Ste splashed his face with water and closed his eyes in anticipation of the mammoth task of finding a job ASAP when his CV was probably the least impressive thing any hiring manager could wish to see.

"you don't have to do it today, you could take a few days off" she reasoned.

"you know as well as I do it's not going to be easy for me to get another job. No, best get started today" he gave her a weak smile which she returned.

"you know I could kill Brendan Brady! I almost felt sorry for him being in prison for crimes he didn't do but he wants locking up anyway the control freak!"

Ste let out a huffed laugh as he spat his toothpaste in to the sink and rinsed. As much as it had caused problems in the past, especially with Brendan, he loved how angry Amy would get on his behalf about how people treated him. it made him feel loved, that she still had his back after everything.

once he'd showered and dressed, he began making breakfast for everyone

"who waaannttss PANCAKES?!" he bellowed down the hall.

the cheer could be heard from the kid's bedroom and their chanting of 'Pancakes! pancakes! pancakes!'

"right well you need to be dressed, with your school bags ready and sat at this table in two minutes or mummy and daddy get alllll the pancakes"

Amy smiled at him as she took her place at the table

"they'll get used to this you know, daddy making them weekend breakfast on the weekday. you're shooting yourself in the foot" she teased.

"I'll go over the club now before work to get your wages, i don't want you to have to speak to him again. and then you're swinging by the school at lunchtime?"

"yeah, I'll take Lucas to nursery and Leah to school, come back here to clean and put the washing on, then come and meet you to pick up the copies of my CV. try and get around as many places as possible this afternoon to drop it off, then pick the kids up and make dinner for us all. what time you back again?" he rattled off whilst plating up.

" 6.30" she giggled through mouthfuls of pancake.

"what?"

"nothing, it's just i could get used to having a house wife" she mocked playfully.

"oh yeah? you gonna make an honest man out of me first?"

"ha, an honest man? i think that ships well and truly sailed, don't you?"

"fair point" he agreed just as Leah and Lucas came tearing down the hallway and sat at their chairs tucking into the pancake art Ste had made them. A bunny's butt and feet, with whipped cream for a tail, banana slices for paw pads, and chocolate chips for toes. he always did have a knack for this stuff. Amy stood and downed the rest of her coffee, picked up her work bag, said her goodbyes to the kids and placed a kiss on Ste's cheek.

"this is for the best you know, in the long run. we'll be ok"

he nodded and tried to give her his most optimistic smile, despite just how pessimistic he truly felt. the thought of being a jobless dad on benefits loomed over him like a dark cloud, as did the fact last night Brendan Brady had not only got rid of him like an old toy he no longer wanted, but that he taken another man home right in front of him, right in front of the whole club. Closet case Brendan brady was no more, and yet he still didn't want Ste. He pushed just how much that had actually hurt him to the back of his mind and tried to focus on today and the future, whatever that may hold.

It had been just over a week since Ste was sacked, and his job prospects were as bleak as ever. He's been optimistic at first and seen this as a chance to get back to what he loved, cooking, and so he'd hit up every restaurant and Bistro in hollyoaks and Chester. Then he tried the coffee shops and cafes, then the greasy spoons. Nothing. He'd even said he could do waiting, or bar work, cleaning, bus boy, anything to get his foot in the door and then work his way up. but no one was hiring, or at least that's what they told him, they may well have just not wanted him specifically. He tried every bar and pub around, shop assistant roles, the big Asda in Chester (and literally they employed the worst of the worst) still nothing. The only nibble he'd had was when he went to a gay club in town and the bar manager had told him that they didn't have any jobs going, but that a boy that 'looked like him' would be able to find ways to be paid for his services, with a wink thrown in for good measure just in case Ste hadn't got the gist. no thanks.

what made it worse was the humiliation that Brendan knew he didn't have a job because he hadn't been contacted as a reference by a single person. he also would have been well aware just how desperate Ste would have been becoming, he wasn't the type to have savings for a rainy day that he could rely on, he and Amy lived hand to mouth and Brendan knew that. The thought made him clench his fists in anger, Brendan hated him that much that he'd let his kids suffer, or maybe he wanted Ste to go begging for his job back so he could once again control him. Ste wasn't going to do that though; he wasn't going to give Brendan the satisfaction. He had to admit he'd got a sort of kick out of the fact Declan had come running to him when he fallen out with Brendan, that he'd got to hide him away from the big bad wolf and then delivered him back home when he was ready, but he'd paid for that of course with a punch to the stomach, it was worth it though to see Brendan riled up. not so nonchalant anymore.

Ste wondered when they'd gotten so bitter towards each other, it kind of made him sad, but nowhere near as much as it made him angry. Fuck you Brendan Brady, you mean nothing now.

After yet another long day of pointlessly delivering his CV around he trudged into college coffee and collapsed on the bar stool in front of Amy, head in his hands on the counter.

"oh dear, still no luck?" she sighed looking at him with what he was sue was pity.

"oh no I've got a job Amy, start tomorrow, £30k a year and a company car" he spat with sarcasm

"a company car, eh? do they know you've got a record for stealing cars and driving without a licence? might throw a spanner in the works" she wasn't biting.

"Ha Ha Ha" he said monotone.

"yeah, well don't get funny with me steven, I'm on your side remember"

"yessss, i know. I'm sorry. ugh i just cant believe this is happening, I thought I was past all this. it's like being a 17year old drop out again" he groaned.

she smiled at him sadly and started making a coffee. "well you're not useless"

"excuse me?" he looked at her perplexed.

"it might be thin on the ground for actual jobs, but why don't you offer your services around?"

"why do people keep telling me to offer my services?" he grumbled

"what?"

"never mind" he followed with quickly "what do you mean, my services?"

"well like a handyman, odd jobs guy, moving guy" she listed

"a moving guy? me and which van?"

"well you know what i mean, just a helper, we could do with the cash injection until you find something decent"

he wasn't convinced but he didn't shoot her down, she was only trying to help and he wasn't exactly swimming in other offers.

"I'll print some flyers with your number on tomorrow and you can stick them up around here, yeah?

he nodded as enthusiastically as he could at the prospect. Amy then put down a large salted caramel latte and a brownie in front of him and it was genuinely the highlight of his day. perks of her working here, the odd freebie when Tony wasn't looking. He turned around to move to one of the sofa's when he was confronted with the devil himself, Brendan.

"Steven! good to see you're not whiling away your days and your non-existent income in a coffee shop in the middle of the afternoon" Brendan mocked with glee.

he rolled his eyes and went to move past him, he had no witty comeback for why he was here in the day - other than the fact he remained unemployed- and he could hardly retort with the fact Amy had given him his coffee for free. Brendan got in his way again.

"aw, don't tell me you haven't managed to find a job yet, not with all your worldly talents"

Ste could honestly chuck his piping hot coffee in Brendan's face right now if he didn't think Brendan would batter him afterwards. he was so angry he could cry, wait no, angry people didn't cry, why did he want to cry? for fucks sake.

"Haven't you got anybody else to talk to? oh, wait no, no you don't. because you haven't got any friends, your kids don't want anything to do with you, your staff avoid you like the plague and even Cheryl would rather hang around with a load of college students than have to put up with you. So why don't you let me enjoy my coffee in peace, before i go home and spend the evening with my family, yeah?"

He heard Amy let out a snigger behind him but Ste didn't wait for a response before he shoved past Brendan and made his way to an armchair at the side. Brendan tapped his fingers on the counter whilst he let out a huff of a laugh, but it wasn't a real one, Ste knew him well enough to know he did that when he didn't know how to react to someone, then he turned on his heels and walked out. Ste 1, Brendan 0.

Once Brendan had gone, he could relax a bit more, he got out today's paper and started looking at the jobs section with his pen in his hand ready to circle anything of interest.

"job markets not great is it"

Ste looked up confused as to who had spoken when he noticed a man sat on his own in the corner table that was almost hidden behind the industrial sized coffee machine.

"eh?"

"the job market, with the current climate and nearly every man and his dog having degrees these days, its not easy getting a job, especially when you need someone to take a chance on you" the man spoke steadily.

Ste studied the man and couldn't imagine him needing anyone to take a chance on him. He looked confident, a real cool, calm and collected type. he was well spoken but with a very slight accent that Ste couldn't place. He looked like the kind of guy that wouldn't struggle to get anything he wanted, but he wasn't arrogant or well to do, he looked normal. maybe better than normal, attractive in a way, but an easy kind of guy.

"yeah, tell me about it" was the best Ste could come back with, idiot.

"sorry, I'm being nosey. i couldn't help but overhear your conversation with the girl who works here and i could see you studying the vacancies page as intensely as a student reading their exam paper in a final!" the man explained.

"i wouldn't know, I've never sat an exam" honestly Ste could kick himself for being so gormless.

"ah, that might allude as to why you're struggling to get a job as much as you are" the man concluded.

"alright, you don't have to rub it in" Ste mumbled self-consciously, looking back at the paper.

"no sorry that came out wrong, i wasn't one for exams either, i really wasn't trying to belittle you" the man chastised himself.

"don't worry about it" Ste mumbled again, he wanted this conversation to be over, he already felt like a failure enough he didn't need randoms sticking the boot in.

"like i said, i overheard your conversation and i think i might be able to help you, or you help me rather."

he had Ste's attention now. he continued

"I'm new to the area, I'm moving from Birmingham at the weekend. I've got a van but the amount they charge you for some blokes to help you unload and unpack is outrageous. so i could do with an extra pair of hands?"

"i don't need charity" Ste spat quickly. he bloody did though.

"woah its not charity, i need your help and I'll pay you for your time and services"

Ste was really beginning to hate the word services.

"erm, ok yeah, i guess, when?"

"Saturday, maybe Sunday too if we don't get it all done in one day. I should be here by 11am. give me your number and i can text you the address and my details"

Ste reached into his pocket for his phone when the man stood and strode over to him. Ste looked up and the man was tall, taller than he'd thought, probably late twenties early thirties. he had floppy 90's dirty blonde boyband hair and a hoop piercing at the top of his ear. He really was quite attractive in a way. He took Ste's phone out of his hand and called himself so he had Ste's number and the added his details into Ste's phone.

"my names Simon" he said smoothly whilst handing Ste his phone back. Ste just stared at him "this is the part where you tell me your name"

"huh? oh right yeah, Ste, Ste, My name is ste." he stuttered as his voice broke.

"nice to meet you Ste, and let's call it £10 an hour?" Simon looked at Ste's lips and then back to his eyes.

"erm, yeah, great, see you Saturday" he called out after Simon as he walked out of college coffee.

Ste continued to sit there staring around him, completely flummoxed, did that just happen? once he'd finished his coffee he took the empty mug back up to Amy to say his goodbyes.

"did you see that bloke?"

"what bloke?" she asked looking around

"the one who was talking to me before"

"noooo, what was he like?" she asked playfully, getting the wrong end of the stick.

"nah it was nowt like that, he heard me and you talking before and he's moving here at the weekend, wants me to help him unload his stuff and unpack and that, £10 an hour!" he said hurriedly

"wow that's good! see i knew this would work, even if it's just £50 that will cover the food shop and eclectic for next week, and me and the kids are going to my dads for the week so you don't have to worry about cooking for us or anything" she cheerily added.

"yeah, yeah, first good thing to happen all week! see you at home. pasta bake alright?"

"mmmm you know the way to my heart" she cooed.

as he walked home Ste felt decidedly happier than he had this morning. He wasn't going to get ahead of himself, this was a couple of hours paid to shift some boxes around, not an actual job, but it was a start. He didn't feel quite as useless as he had earlier. he also tried to ignore the fact he was sure, well he kind of thought, that maybe, there was a chance, that Simon had been flirting with him.

Saturday came around quicker than he thought, he'd been up early to make the kids breakfast and help Amy pack up their stuff and had watched them drive away in the taxi for their week at mikes. He'd cleaned the flat, put away all the toys, showered and now he was sat waiting for word from Simon. he was a bit nervous, but that was crazy, wasn't it? what's there to be nervous about, it's shifting a few bits of furniture not brain surgery. Simon's new flat was about a 20-minute walk from Ste's flat, so when it got to 10.30 he started his journey, he wasn't wasting what money he was about to earn of a bus fare.

he was there before Simon, so he sat on the garden wall outside and dangled his legs above the floor. The area was nice, fairly new, in fact the block of flat Simon was moving in to was a new build and it didn't look like anyone else lived in the other two flats yet. Ste wondered what he did for a living, he didn't look like the business type, he'd been wearing jeans and an army jacket anorak thing when Ste met him, but looks can be deceiving. around 10 minutes later Ste saw the large white removal van approaching so he jumped off the side of the wall to greet his 'boss'.

'Bright and early Ste, i like it. I'll be sure to recommend you to my friends"

"really?!... oh, no, not really, you're joking. obviously" Ste muttered embarrassed at himself, feeling his cheeks reddening as Simon gazed at him.

Simon looked at him amused with his head tilted to the side as he looked Ste up and down. Ste could have sworn he heard Simon say 'adorable' under his breath, but then he must have just made that up in his head.

They spent the first two hours trapsing up and down the stairs, taking every box, suitcase and piece of furniture out of the van and moving it into the 2nd floor flat. Simon didn't even seem to have that much, it just took ages moving it all in, and as Simon said, it would have taken him twice as long on his own.

"Right, I'm going to drop the rental van off at the car company and then grab some shopping on the way back, are you alright to stay here and start unpacking? all the boxes are labelled by what room they need to go in and I'm not precious about where it goes within that room."

"erm... yeah, you're just going to leave me alone in your flat?" Ste questioned

"yeah, not scared, are you?" Simon asked amused.

"what? no nah, not me. just, bit weird leaving a stranger in your new flat with all your stuff init? i could do anything"

"like what Ste?" Simon perched himself on the arm of his sofa, that had been a nightmare to get up the staircase, like some scene out of friends.

"well i don't know, nick stuff. go through your personal belongings"

"are you going to read my diary Ste?" Simon asked him with faux concern.

Ste laughed coyly and blushed "shut up, i was just saying, you should be more careful, cant trust everyone"

"oh, I think i can trust you" Simon said, with a meaning behind it that Ste didn't quite understand. He pushed himself off the sofa arm and leant across Ste, far closer than he needed to, and picked up the van keys from the breakfast island.

"Won't be longer than two hours, do you want me to grab you anything to eat? sorry I've only given you water so far, this is probably slave labour"

"nah nah its fine thanks, i had breakfast"

"ha is it an either-or kind of thing? can't have both breakfast and lunch?" Simon joked. Not realising how truthful that was, that there were many times when Ste and Amy hadn't eaten to make sure Leah and Lucas were fed and their bills paid, and the longer this unemployment went on, the closer they came to that realty again. Ste laughed the comment off and picked a box up to unpack.

Simon opened the door to leave but leant back in to say something "i know i said i wasn't precious, but could you start in the bedroom? the thought of not having a made bed and all that when i finally crash this evening is a daunting one"

"sure, no worries" Ste smiled

"good lad" Simon winked and walked out.

Ste tried not to overthink that wink, or the comment earlier, or how many times Simon had accidently brushed his body against Ste's at some point in the day, and he definitely tried not to overthink the fact he was about to unpack and make up his bedroom for him.

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