Author's Note: Thank you very much for all your kind words last chapter. Sherlock is a great character now he's grown. As for this chapter; this is only the second time I've felt compelled to change up the naming convention. It felt more important than just a "first". I'm pleased with this chapter but I am still very nervous about how you'll take it. Please read, review, and enjoy!

Disclaimer: Clearly I don't own Sherlock. The show is the baby of Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss, while Sherlock Holmes itself is the creation of Arthur Conan Doyle.

The Time She Decided To Keep The Baby

The lure of home was too much for Anthea to stay away for too long. It could possibly be pregnancy hormones already effecting her behaviour and emotions, but Anthea yearned for her home. She wanted her bed, her stupid empty fridge, and most of all she wanted her boyfriend. Her infuriating boyfriend. Sitting alone in her flat stressing out probably wasn't healthy for her or for the little collection of cells. They'd be better off if their host was comfortable.

The quintessential smell that Anthea had stopped associating with Mycroft's house and instead associated with the idea of home hit her as soon as she opened the front door. Immediately she felt more relaxed. If she only had limited time left in this house she was going to cherish every moment. Including the echoes of her heels on the floor as she walked through the entrance way.

Anthea was surprised when she entered the living room to see Mycroft sitting on the couch. It was lunch time on a week day, he shouldn't be here. He should be at work or the club. He wasn't reading and he wasn't working, he was just sitting there. Mycroft Holmes in a dark place doing nothing but sitting and thinking couldn't be good. There was no way to predict what he had been doing to himself mentally. The steel eyes attached their gaze upon Anthea's face as soon as she entered but his blank facial expression didn't change at all. It was like a defensive mechanism – as if moving meant he had to speak.

"Oh," Anthea pouted her lips. "Hello." She said. "I thought you'd be at work." She put her bag down by the door and walked into the kitchen. Mycroft's eyes followed her path. She went into the fridge in search of something to drink other than water. She'd thrown up that morning and even brushing her teeth hadn't removed the taste from her mouth. She found a small bottle of orange juice that was good for another day. That was lucky considering their fridge.

"I was waiting for you." Mycroft called out as Anthea shut the fridge. She walked back into the living room, unscrewing the lid to the orange juice. She took a sip and look at Mycroft. His hands were folded together in his lap and he was gently tapping one of his feet so his leg shook. He was no longer looking at Anthea but at his hands. She screwed the lid back on the orange juice and held the bottle close to her chest.

"For two days?" She asked.

"Yes." It was an instant and automatic reply. To be honest, Anthea was surprised. He was supposed to not care about her decision, and their fights had never led to him not going to work before. Then again, all those other times his life wasn't falling to pieces around him. But there were troubles at work.

"Do you think it's a good idea to have a few days off while you're all busy cleaning up the Sherrinford mess?" Anthea asked, assistant mask on for a moment.

"I don't care." Mycroft said just as quickly as before but this time a hint of bitterness in his tone. Anthea remembered Sherlock listing what Mycroft needed to be happy. If he were lacking some of those things then maybe it would make sense for him not to care about work. It was concerning and just a little bit sweet. Anthea was far from forgiving his behaviour, however. Anthea shrugged at him.

"Well I don't know if I'm going to work tomorrow, yet." She spoke as aloof as possible. "I just wanted to come home." Mycroft lifted his head to look at Anthea. There was something akin to desperation in his eyes.

"Are you staying?" He asked in a cool tone but his eyes gave him away. Anthea pursed her lips and inhaled through her nose.

"Depends if you're going to kick me out soon or not." She answered just as coolly. Mycroft licked his lips and swallowed his breath.

"I take it you've made your decision, then." He said. Anthea hated that, her decision. All the same, she nodded. She had made her decision.

"The universe, fate, God, bad luck, whatever it was," Anthea rolled her eyes and shook her head. "They decided to give me this one opportunity to have a kid and I'm going to take it." Mycroft mimed an 'oh'. To the untrained eye there was no reaction, to Anthea she could see him deflating just a little bit more. "I thought I could get rid of it and keep my life the way it is but then I kept picturing the person this little blob could be and I couldn't get rid of it. I want to meet them. I think they could be pretty incredible." Her lips pulled into a small bittersweet smile. A Holmes with some Clarke in it. Just imagine the possibilities. "I'd like to help the next little Holmes make the same sort of mark on the world that you and your siblings have. Even at the expense of my relationship with the most influential man in the world."

"I'd never wish our legacy upon anyone." Mycroft muttered under his breath.

"Really?" Anthea asked, cocking her head to the side. "The British Government, The world's only consulting detective who is world famous, and the brightest mind in the history of the world. I think it sounds impressive." Mycroft shrunk into himself further. He clearly disagreed. The silence clinging to the air, Anthea looked across at the piano with the candelabra on in. She shook her head to move her hair out of the way and to clear her brain. "So where does that leave us?" Anthea asked. Her grip on the orange juice was tight. "Do you want me to leave now or is this going to be nine months' notice to vacate?" She couldn't help but joke a little. It's what she did. Mycroft clicked his tongue.

"Anthea." He chided.

"No." Anthea said calmly. "I'm being realistic here, Myc." Mycroft unfolded his hands and shifted his body to face her direction.

"Come sit down and allow me to explain a few things you didn't let me explain earlier." He spoke in his calming, melodic tone. A single laugh caught in Anthea's throat and it escaped sounding like a snort.

"Myc, I had just found out I was pregnant. I was flailing and you weren't being very helpful."

"Just –" Mycroft cut himself off with a sigh of exasperation. He looked up at the room then patted the couch cushion next to him. "Come sit down, will you?" Sherlock's words bouncing around in her head, Anthea took the seat. She had, if she remembered properly through the panic and the hurt, cut him off numerous times. Once she was next to him, Mycroft took hold of Anthea's closest hand. He placed it between both his elegant, warm, gentle hands. It was like a warm blanket being placed on her shoulders. "I don't want children." He practically whispered. Anthea rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, I know." Anthea said. She tried to take her hand back but found Mycroft clinging to it tightly.

"No, no. Allow me to elaborate, Ali, please." His deep blue eyes had no steel walls to hide the desperation that danced within them. Anthea relaxed again. She nodded for him to continue. "It's not just for selfish reasons, you understand?" He implored. His jaw clenched and for a moment he was lost in his mind again. When he came back to reality he looked just as haunted as he had since he found out Eurus had escaped. "Ali, I am not the type of person who should be having a child." He shook his head a single time. "This is not about your talks of shades of grey, I am not simply talking about work and how I have to dispassionately organise tasks that others would deem disgusting or horrible. I am talking about me as a person, and everything I choose to do." Anthea cocked her head to the side as Mycroft continued. "Do you remember how you and James reacted to how I handled Jamie's kidnapping? What about your beloved NDA or the time I completely destroyed or relationship by asking you to leave? Or how I sent my brother on a mission that would surely lead to his death. I knew my sister was alive and I knew precisely where she was and how she was treated but I did nothing to inform my parents. My own mother and father, the people who are supposed to love me unconditionally, hate me. They love Eurus, but me? I've gone too far even for them." Anthea's heart broke. How must that feel to him? To a man who called his mother 'Mummy' to feel like she no longer loved him? It must be agonising. He was such an over thinker too. He'd be obsessing over it. "That is who I am, Alice. Allow me the theatrics to say that I destroy everything I touch."

"Myc…"

"No, I do." He nodded softly three or four times. "I've ruined Sherlock in all my attempts to help him and I have done nothing but trying to do right by him." He smiled bitterly as a sharp sigh escaped from his lips. "Can you imagine what I would do to a child? Why, it would be the next Jim Moriarty or Eurus given they live long enough to reach that level of insanity or bitterness." Anthea finally returned the squeeze on her hand, holding Mycroft's hand back. "You do not want that for your child, Alice, and I most certainly do not want that for your child."

"You're an idiot." Anthea laughed in a soft, airy, and sombre laugh. "You've dedicated your life to saving Sherlock from himself. If you weren't around do you think Sherrinford would let Eurus have a violin in her cell? Or let her read books and journal articles?" Mycroft wasn't meeting her eye as she spoke. "And your parents do love you. If they don't, you know what? Their loss. You're brilliant, and you have the biggest heart out of anyone in their family. And if you can't see why I would want a man who would use all his power and resources to help his family be a father to my child then it's your loss." With her free hand she patted Mycroft's cheek. "But I love you," She lowered her hand. "And if you don't want us then I'll respect your choice."

"There's the rub." Mycroft's eyebrows bounced up and down as he quoted Hamlet. Again Sherlock's words came to Anthea's mind. Mycroft always scoffed when Anthea talked about theatre but how often had they actually quoted Shakespeare or other plays at each other? Little Lady Bracknell. "I don't want children but I don't want to lose you." A pained expression passed his face and his hands tightened around hers. "I can't lose you again. Not now." Anthea sniffed in her throat again. Not at Mycroft's words, for she believed the sincerity in them, but at the idea.

"That's not really possible anymore, is it?" She crinkled her nose as she smirked despite herself. Mycroft's eyes watched her nose and trailed down to her lips. He was doing that thing where he was filing away images again. He always did that when he hadn't seen her in a while.

"That is why I am asking you to give me time." He breathed. "Time to decide if, since this isn't just anyone, since this is your child, if I could come around to the idea of having a child. Then, after that, time to see if I could become a person worthy of being a father to your child. And if I can't see having a child, or I don't feel as if I am a good enough role model or provider for you and your child, that's when we'll need to discuss the end of…" He stopped himself from scowling but Anthea could see it in the way his neck and jaw tensed. "Us."

"That can't work." Anthea shook her head. She hated saying it, because she wanted nothing more than to be with her Mycroft but it was absurd. "Myc, this isn't like your stupid understandings and not-dating when it was just you and me. A baby's room needs to be prepared, and I'll need baby proof. It's not like I can put off setting up until you decided what you want. What if you don't decide until it's born? What am I supposed to do?" Mycroft looked confused and a little hurt. It was like he was seeing something she couldn't and expected her to. There was some Holmes logic at play, surely.

"Alice, I told you that I would never kick you out of our home again." He said. There it was. That was what she was supposed to understand. How was she supposed to know that that was a vow and not something he'd said just to get her back? "By all means, take one of the rooms in the house. Take three, if you wish, and set it up how you like. I have the issue, I will be the one to leave." Anthea clicked her tongue lovingly, cocking her head to the side.

"Oh, Mycroft." She squeezed his hand. "This is your home. You can't leave it."

"It was a place of residence before you, nothing more." He stated coolly. "But if you do not wish to stay here then I'd stay at a hotel until I could have a house bought and prepared for you. No matter what happens, you will be taken care of."

"Because you'd always planned to pay off any accidents?" Anthea teased, once again not being able to help herself. Mycroft's face said that he didn't see the humour.

"No." He sounded like a hurt teenager. "Because I love you and not being together will not change that." He is a creature of habit, Sherlock had said. He can't break them. Anthea looked down to her lap and blinked to stop her eyes from filling with water. Stupid pregnancy hormones. It had to be that. She wasn't an emotional person. She laughed silently, wiping away the non-existent tears.

"Okay." She whispered. The personal assistant looked back up at her genius boyfriend and nodded feverously. "Okay." She said again. "It's still a stupid idea but you know what? I love you and nothing's going to change that either so if I only have nine months left with you then I will absorb all the stupid Mycroft I can get." Mycroft's mouth drew down and he quirked his eyebrow.

"Are you suggesting you'd quit?" He asked, aghast. "Because I will never find an assistant like you again and I refuse to retrain another. I'll keep you on any hours you wish. I can be very flexible in negotiations." Anthea cracked up laughing. She threw her head back and felt some real joy. There was that creature of habit again. Switching straight into work mode the moment he was afraid of going through a list of assistants again. Anthea once again placed her hand on his cheek.

"I love you." She giggled. Mycroft didn't even smirk.

"You didn't answer." He muttered.

"Give me nine months to decide." She whispered teasingly, widening her eyes with the joke. She leaned forward and kissed Mycroft on the cheek right next to her thumb. As she began to pull away he stopped her and kissed her lips sweetly and gently. It linger, the kiss longer than his usual chaste kiss, before he pulled back.

"I suppose that's fair." He hummed. Anthea laughed lightly again and leaned against the arm of the couch. As she looked at Mycroft she placed a hand on her abdomen. This was it. She was really keeping this little blob of a thing and one day it might be a person with that weird sense of humour and strange obliviousness. Or they might roll their eyes with her at Mycroft's behaviours, should he stick around. Sherlock seemed pretty certain he'd stick around. Mycroft himself and Anthea were less certain. It might be idiotic of them both to stay together right now and act like everything was okay but they needed each other. Neither of them were in a particularly good place and neither of them had ever felt quite as alone in the world as they did right now. If they needed each other, so what? It might work out… Maybe. Sherlock thinks it will.

"How are you feeling?" Mycroft asked, taking Anthea out of her thoughts. Why was he asking? Was he just trying to be polite? "Has the taste left your mouth yet?" Anthea frowned. Mycroft gestured towards the orange juice on her lap. Of course he connected the dots. Anthea pursed her lips and threw one hand in the air.

"It's masked but it's still there." She replied. Mycroft let go of Anthea's hands and clapped his hands together.

"You know what will help with that?" He spoke with some vigour. "It's about an hour away, but there is this small patisserie I've never taken you to. They make macarons far superior than any I've ever had in France." Anthea, amused and confused by his energy and suggestion, looked him up and down.

"What's with you?" She asked. "Are you trying to take me on a date?" She teased. The genius bristled.

"No." That teenaged tone of his back. "I missed you, I upset you, and I'm trying to compensate us for both of those things by spending time with you."

"Or," Anthea rose her index finger. "You missed me, you were worried about me, on top of everything else, and now you want to stress eat some sweets?"

"No." He hissed. He clicked his tongue and looked to the side of the room, looking put out.

"I'm sorry, sir." She laughed, the sir coming out naturally as it sometimes did. It was a reflex with specific words and phrases. "You want to make it up to me and spend time with me. I'd love to try these macarons." Mycroft pouted, still looking away.

"Maybe I don't want to take you anymore." Anthea scoffed in surprised and laughed again. He was such a teenager! She shouldn't be making fun of him so much when he was going through so much and so down on himself but she was going through a lot too and he was making it too easy.

"Myc!" She stroked his arm. "Mycroft I am sorry, I really am. I know, I know. Weight jokes and orphan jokes are off limits, I'm sorry cutie." He turned to look at her with his pouty expression as she continued. "You know how I feel about your dieting, so come on. I really, really want to try these really nice macarons." The pout faded away. She felt like she was a mother already.

"Fine." He sighed dramatically, like he was relenting and agreeing to do something that she asked him to do and not the other way around. "Get a coat. It might be cold by the time we head back home."

Author's Note: Ah! I'm nervous! I hope you liked it, I really do! I get nerves very similar to the nerves I get before going on stage when I'm posting an anticipated chapter like this. So please, help my little performer's soul and give me some feedback! Thanks to our guest reviewers; Madalina, Guests x2, It's me, Christie, BarbieTheShihtzu, and Guesswho. Thanks to all my reviewers, you mean the world to me.

Also important: I have my final assignment before exams due soon and it's for one of my writing classes. As you know I'm a fast writer so it may not get in the way of the fic but just in case I get writer's block for one or both of these things I'm going to say the update will be between 5 to 7 days. This will be the last altered schedule for a few months, I should imagine, unless something comes up.