A/N Got a long chapter here for everyone! Thank you to everybody for reading this far. I'd love to know what y'all think of this. Chapters too long? Too short? Too fast paced/rushed, too slow? Characters in character or ooc? Let me know! I am a bit out of practice and it would be pretty cool to get feedback! :)
Once she was convinced that she was alone, she lay back and stared up at the padded ceiling. She'd already tried burning her way out, to no effect. Mother was hovering off to the side, but was mostly leaving her alone.
"Now what do I do? I can't get out of here without help. But everyone here thinks I'm crazy. I might have at least had a shot with those guards if given a few more days, but now, I have to start from scratch. And I can't hear them, and all they're going to do is get in my head and try to convince me that I'm wrong to want the throne. Or Father. I won't talk, no matter what they say. I won't speak." She says to herself resolutely. Her mother drifts closer. At least here with the light, she doesn't look so ghostly.
"Don't even think about it, Mother. I don't want you, I don't need you. Go away." Azula huffs. Her mother stays where she is, but says nothing.
The door slides open. A man about a foot and a half taller than her walks in. She recognizes him as the guard she'd overheard feeling sorry for her in the Tower. He'd slipped her extra food and kind words a few times.
Azula feels utter rage at seeing him again.
"What are you doing here? Go away! I don't want your pity." She snaps.
"I'm sorry, Princess, but I'm afraid that my orders are to stay close to you. My name is Chey. I am here to help you get to your appointments, bring you your meals, and to listen if you have anything you wish to speak of during your stay here." He bows briefly and takes a seat close to the center of the room.
"How did you manage to get transferred here? I would think they would have put someone in here with the training to work with the insane. Unless, of course, you intend to beat me back to sanity." She crosses her arms and taps her foot.
"I asked specifically for this post. I'm not sure that anyone else feels the way I do about you. I want to help you. The doctor does too, and the nurses, but they are not able to restrain you effectively between your quarters and their offices. Basically, they wanted a guard from the military for extra protection. Everyone else that I know of thinks I'm crazy to want to help you. But I know you can't be all bad. I have a daughter of my own. She is about six or seven now. I don't see her often. You are only fourteen. You still have so to learn and so much life ahead of you! It would be a shame to see you waste it all behind walls and bars. So, I beg of you, Princess, let me be not just another guard, but a companion to you." He takes some fruit tarts and meat from a pocket. "Please, take this. You will need strength for what lies ahead."
Azula regards the food with a mixture of suspicion and hatred. This man feels sorry for her! For her, the most powerful Firebender in the world! The Princess of the Fire Nation! How dare he?!
"I don't need your pity and I don't need your help!" She yells as knocks the food to the floor. "Go back to your precious daughter! Go pity her for her lack of royal blood! Pity her for the fact that she'll spend her days in a fallen Nation, subject to the laws and the whims of the others! Pity her for the fact that she'll probably never be permitted to learn any form of combat skill or discipline! Don't pity me! I have all that I need!"
He simply picks the food up off the floor and puts it back in his pocket. He returns to staring at the wall.
Azula launches a few dim fireballs at him. A single one sets his sleeve alight. He calmly puts it out with water from his canteen, gets up, and leaves, putting out the candle lamp in the ceiling as he does so.
"Oh, Azula. He wants to help you." Her mother chides. "How could you be so cruel to him? The sooner you cooperate, the sooner you can leave."
"I don't need you telling me who to trust. You're the one who left us! You're the one who chose Zuko over me! I hate you! I've always hated you! And I know you hate me too. You said yourself that something was wrong with me! You thought I was a monster. I don't need you. And I don't want you! Go away!" But her dim, small fire isn't even enough to bring light to the blackness around her. And her mother stays right where she is, although she says nothing more.
Laying down on the floor of her new cell, she vows vengeance on that guard. The minute that I see that door open...
She envisions making a break for it, finding something sharp, and stabbing anyone who was stupid enough to get in her way. She envisions locking her brother in here, seeing how he liked it. She imagined more scars on his body, more agonized screams. Her mouth twists into a cruel smile.
Just wait, brother. I'll make you pay dearly for what you have done to me. And I'll enjoy every minute of it.
The tiny flame in her grows a bit, and turns from dim red to a more normal orange.
((page break))
She must have fallen asleep at some point, because the next time she opens her eyes, the candle is flickering to life in the lamp above her head. Chey opens the door as she stands up quickly. The door is shut before she has a chance to knock him aside and run.
"Good morning, Princess." He greets kindly. He sets a steaming bowl of soup and a cup of chamomile tea in front of her. "I hope you enjoy your breakfast. Did you rest well?"
Azula chooses not to respond. She knows she does need to eat, so she takes the bowl and tea. Chey sits across from her, facing the door. Not away from her, not towards her.
"You aren't going to try to get me to talk about my feelings?" She prods.
"No, that won't do any good, will it? I'm here if you want to talk, but I know that I can't make you. And I want you to be comfortable. I want you to trust me."
"Trust is for fools. And subordinates." She scoffs. "I make it a point not to trust anyone."
"Did someone betray you, Princess?" His voice carries true sympathy. Like he knows what betrayal feels like.
What a fool. It's absolutely disgusting that you think I need you so badly. I wonder who betrayed you?
"No one would dare! They all fear me too greatly." She wants to shoot a blue flame to emphasize her point, but she's done humiliating herself with bad firebending. She hasn't been able to bend more than a few dim flickers since her Agni Kai.
"Why is that a good thing? Don't you want anyone to love you?" He sounds like he's making genuine conversation. Almost like...
The beach! The campfire! My own mother thought I was a monster! She was right, of course, but it still hurt. Still hurts.
Unbidden, images of Mai and Ty Lee enter her mind.
"You miscalculated. I love Zuko, more than I fear you."
"No, you're wrong! You should have feared me more!"
"Princess? Your Highness, are you alright? I really didn't mean to cause any hurt. I'm sorry." Chey's voice pulls her out of her thoughts. An idea begins to blossom in her mind.
I have to be careful...I'm not a natural, but I think I can figure it out, based on what I saw others do at the beach, in the Earth Kingdom...
"I'm alright. I may have had some betrayals, but I'm not sure that I'm...comfortable sharing about them." She allows her voice to soften a little. "It sounds like you have personal experience. Who betrayed you?" She carefully reaches out and places her hand on his shoulder. She tries to mold her face into that pathetic look. The feeling of both her hand and her facial expression is foreign to her. Am I doing this right?
She must be doing something right. Chey relaxes visibly and begins recounting a tale of how he'd been abandoned by both his parents, back in Hira'a, how he'd managed to disguise himself as someone from one of the more prosperous regions and sign up for the military. He'd had to fake his age, and his credentials, and forge a false parental signature, but he'd made it. He found some friends in the early days, and even had a crush on one of the female guards. One of his friends ruined that for him though, as a prank that they thought would be harmless. Then he was shipped off to fight in the some of the lesser battles of the war. He did some work for his captain as a double agent, posing as a fisherman, a farmer, a thief, and once as a cabbage merchant. When he returned, he was assigned guard duty for the Tower. He met another girl and managed to successfully convince her to be his wife.
Azula relishes the tale far more than she thought she would. Chey was a master of disguise and navigating shifting alliances. He could be useful to her after all. She still hates him. She has to bite back a grin as she thinks of three different ways she could possibly betray him to the rest of the staff, just to see the look on his face when he realized that he'd been duped by fate yet again. But she knows she can't follow through on it. Not yet. And she's only missing one more thing on the list to making a temporary ally.
"Wow, it seems you really are a master in the art of deception. I'm impressed. You would have been useful in my coup at Ba Sing Se. In fact, you might have even bested me that one time." She says, forcing what she hopes looks like a genuinely impressed smile. Then, she lets her face slide into an expression of dismay, with a bit of fear. "But how can I trust you now?" She asks, in a sad voice. "It seems that all your life was a lie in one way or another. You lied about your age, forged signatures, stole from fellow soldiers' tents because someone dared you, fooled some of the better minds on the enemy side into thinking you were one of them...What if a doctor or someone outside the asylum asks you about me? Is there anything real about you at all?" She pulls away from him and hugs herself defensively. I might be overdoing this. It feels humiliating! It seems like it's working.
Chey looks like he's wondering the same thing himself.
"Did you say you had a daughter?" Azula prompts. Her assumption proves correct, as his face lights up like the sun.
"Yes! If there is anything real about me, it's her! Her name is Shinjitsu. She's the most darling little girl that you'll ever meet! The last time I saw her was when she was four. She lives in one of the colonies with her mother right now. I hear from them once every few months or so. I hope to see them soon, now that the war's ended. Just last month, she wrote to me herself for the first time! It was a bit difficult to read her handwriting, but she'll improve in a few years." He sighs happily. "Never underestimate the power of family, Princess. It can truly pull you from deepest depths of the dark. It can make you someone you never thought you could be."
I've got you now! You'll be my ticket out of here!
"You know, I think we got off on the wrong foot." She smiles. Her face is getting tired from all this overuse. "You aren't so bad after all, Chey."
She looks down and lets her face fall into a frown. "I'm sorry that I was so...combative, when we first met. I have felt the sting of betrayal. It's difficult to come back from."
"I understand, Princess. I won't betray you. If you want to talk about it, I can listen. But if you don't, I understand that too. Some things are just too painful." His voice conveys sympathy once more. He reaches out for her, seems to think better of it, and draws back.
"No, I...want to talk about it. I think it might help." She forces herself to relax. She'll tell the truth, but only as she sees fit. He sees the change in her posture and takes it as permission to place a hand on her shoulder.
Azula almost gives herself away by balking away from it. The contact feels so foreign and strange. She's itching to get away from it. But she forces herself to relax and appear sad and small. It feels utterly ridiculous.
"Two of my closest friends, Mai and Ty Lee, fought by my side in an attempt to bring down my uncle and brother. Father wanted to be able to bring down the Avatar, so that he would keep his rightful place as Fire Lord. My brother conspired with the enemy to break a Water Peasant chief out of Boiling Rock." She began.
"I heard about that! One of my friends was stationed there!" Chey interrupts. "They got away though, didn't they? I thought that place was supposed to be escape proof."
"It IS escape proof, you fool!" She erupts. Chey startles back a few feet at the sudden outburst. Azula remembers herself immediately. "I'm sorry, Chey. I'm still a bit... angry about the whole thing. Father trusted those guards and they let him down. All he wanted was to keep his throne! All he wanted was to keep the Fire Nation great! And my friends and I failed too. Mai betrayed me for my brother, and Ty Lee betrayed me for Mai. I don't know how I didn't see it coming. I knew Mai was in love with Zuko! I just didn't realize how untrustworthy it made her!" She wonders if she should act like she's about to cry, but decides that she won't be able to pull that off. She settles for refusing to meet his eyes, staring sadly at the wall off to her right.
"I'm so sorry, Princess." He breathes.
"It just feels like I'll never be able to trust anyone again. My best friends that I've played with and known since childhood... we even went to the same school! They betrayed me... for my traitorous brother! And my father paid the price. And I'm part of that failure too. If I had only known... But I let Father down. All I wanted was for Father to be proud of me!"
Somehow, the words bring a shortness of breathe, but Azula quickly tamps it down.
There is no truth to that! That was Zuko's pathetic problem, not mine! Father still needs me!
"Azula, need is not the same as love." Her mother whispers. Azula grimaces a little, but remembers that Chey can't see or hear her and quickly corrects her expression. "We'll be discussing this later, young lady." Her mother warns.
"I completely understand that feeling. Although I didn't have parents for very long, I remember wanting them to approve of my achievements and brag on me a little." Chey says softly. He reaches a hand over to her again. "It's alright to feel that way."
A lump forms in Azula's throat. It's strange, because she doesn't feel anything that should make it do that. She pretends to cough on the rest of her tea to make it go away.
"I have to leave you now, but I'll be right outside the door if you need me. Just knock or yell." He says. Azula nods.
The moment he is gone, she realizes that she feels rather tired and heavy.
But it's morning! I've only just woken up! That food must have been poisoned! They knew I was going to try to use Chey! He's trying to kill me!
She fights the relaxing of her limbs, the fogginess in her mind. But it's a losing battle, as her body collapses on to the floor and darkness catches up to her.
A/N Uh oh! Azula's plotting escape. How's this going to go? I looked up words online for Chey and Shinjitsu's names. Chey means "Bridge" or "Help" and Shinjitsu (according to the notoriously unreliable Google Translate!) means "truth".