A/N: Revised as of 11/18/2023
An Emergency Quest is a special event that involved the entire town. All available adventurers are called to meet at the front gate. Everyone would then work together to face the oncoming threat.
Naruto stood at the front of the crowd, having been the first to arrive at the gates.
"What's going on? Is the town under attack?"
Kazuma questioned as he pulled up next to the shinobi along with his party.
"That's right, Kazuma and Naruto don't know. This usually happens around this time of the year."
Aqua noted as she cracked her knuckles, seemingly fired up.
"What? What's happening?"
Kazuma persisted for an explanation, but the bluenette ignored him and turned to Naruto.
"You! During this event, we'll settle our score once and for all!"
Aqua proclaimed while pointing at the shinobi.
"Hey, don't ignore me!"
As Kazuma tried to regain the goddess's attention, Naruto shrugged.
"I don't mind the competition, but what are we doing? You seem to know what's going on, mind explaining?"
"Since you're in such dire need of help, I guess I can explain what's going on."
Aqua responded with self-satisfied sigh.
Naruto's eyebrow twitched, but he held his tongue. He would bide his time then wipe the floor with this girl's pride during their little "competition".
"This girl's hopeless… I'm the person who brought her here, she should be explaining this to me..."
Kazuma grumbled to himself as Aqua cleared her throat to begin her explanation.
"Now then, since you have the privilege of the great me explaining everything to you, I'll allow you to treat me to a drink after all of this is over!"
Aqua declared with a triumphant grin on her face.
"Guess I'll just go ask Luna-chan and the others."
Naruto said and moved to walk towards the guild staff, but Aqua frantically cut him off.
"Wait, I'm sorry! I'll properly explain it! Let me explain!"
While Aqua was convincing Naruto to stay and listen to her, Darkness moved to the front of the crowd and shoved the tip of her sword into the ground.
"Don't worry everyone, I will protect you!"
Darkness announced in a serious voice, but the blush on her face made Kazuma uneasy.
'What's up with her… Hm?'
Kazuma thought when he felt a tug on his sleeve, and he turned around to see Megumin pointing. Following her finger, Kazuma's face paled when he saw Naruto had his back to them... and a white piece of cloth was sticking out of the pouch the ninja wore on his waist.
Kazuma quickly looked back at Darkness and found that her blush was increasing, and her breaths were getting heavier.
Due to the sudden announcement of the emergency quest, it seemed Naruto had forgotten to return Darkness's bra and had unconsciously stashed it in his pouch before running out of the guild.
'And that pervert is enjoying having her underwear on display!'
Kazuma thought as he began to walk over to Naruto, who was listening to Aqua's explanation. He was going to put an end to this stupidity before it could even start.
"…ing this time of the year is this world's cabbage harvest!"
Just as Kazuma was about to grab the bra from Naruto's pouch, he froze and looked at Aqua quizzically. Why was that girl talking about vegetables?
"Cabbages?"
Naruto voiced both his and Kazuma's confusion.
At that moment-
"Here they come!"
"It's gonna be a great harvest this year!"
The other adventurers began to shout excitedly as they pointed off into the distance.
Naruto and Kazuma looked out in the distance and saw a great green fog flowing down the distant mountains.
But it was no fog.
Taking a closer look, they noticed that the fog was actually hundreds upon thousands of flying cabbages. The army of vegetables were soaring through the air, beating their leaves like wings.
"This world's cabbages have superior riches, and strong enough mana power to flap their wings and soar through the sky. During the harvesting season, their goal is to fly across the continent to a secluded region away from humans to avoid being eaten."
Aqua explained when she saw the befuddled looks on the boy's faces.
"…Can I go home now?"
Kazuma asked as the other adventurers braced themselves for battle. He didn't come to another world to fight cabbages! He expected Naruto to have a similar reaction, but what he didn't expect was for the blonde to start laughing.
"Hahaha! Those cabbages have wings and they're flying!? Oh man, I should just get used to seeing stuff like this…"
Naruto said as he held his sides that were now aching from his laughter. He knew the vegetables were sentient in this world, but he wasn't expecting to see flying cabbages!
"You're not weirded out by this?"
Kazuma asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Oh, I'm entirely weirded out by this. I hate vegetables, and flying ones can't be any better. But I've battled a couple vegetables the past few days while perfecting my recipe!"
Naruto responded and pulled out a knife from his leg holster in preparation.
Kazuma was curious as to what that recipe was, but he didn't get the chance as Aqua stepped in.
"Naruto! This will be our final showdown! Whoever catches the most cabbages is the winner, and the loser has to do whatever the winner says!"
Aqua declared while pointing at the ninja, a look of confidence on her face.
"Anything the winner wants, huh? Alright! Then I won't lose!"
Naruto responded and smiled mischievously. If he won, he'd make Aqua stay silent for an entire day. If she spoke, then she would have to pay him a fine of 100 Eris for breaking the rule. That'll teach her.
'Why do I get the feeling this isn't going to turn out well for Aqua?'
Kazuma thought as Aqua punched the air enthusiastically.
"I-I will also take part in this competition! If I lose, then I will have no choice but to follow the whims of the winner... No matter how deviant or crude, I will be forced to listen and obey. But don't worry, I am prepared to face such wonderfully awful consequences!"
Darkness declared from the front, having overheard Naruto and Aqua's conversation.
'She just wants to face the punishment.'
Kazuma thought while staring at the blushing knight flatly.
"I, too, will take part in this competition! I'll blast away twice, no, three times as many cabbages with my Explosion magic!"
Megumin shouted loudly while striking a flashy pose.
'And she just wants to be the center of attention. I have a bad feeling about this... Should I really just go home?'
Kazuma thought as the cabbage army neared the gates of the town, and the guild staff started shouting to get their attention.
"Each cabbage will be worth ten-thousand Eris!
"Work hard everyone!"
The staff members shouted as they distributed baskets to the cheering adventurers.
"Ten-thousand Eris!?"
Naruto and Kazuma shouted in unison at the shocking revelation.
"If they're worth that much, then there's no holding back!"
Naruto declared and charged straight towards the army of cabbages, surprising a lot of the adventurers.
"Hey, be careful kid! Those cabbages are strong!"
"Do you wanna get pulverized!?"
"…Hey, what's that hanging out of his pocket?"
The adventurers started shouting for Naruto to come back when someone noticed the white cloth that was hanging from his back pouch.
'Oh no! I forgot about the bra!'
Kazuma thought as he watched the teen shamelessly charge into battle with a bra flailing through the air behind him.
Naruto ignored their shouts and put his fingers into a cross-like fashion. It was time to show these people what Naruto Uzumaki was made of!
"Shadow Clone Jutsu!"
In a "poof" of smoke, nine copies of Naruto appeared, making a total of ten shinobis who were all running towards the army of cabbages. The strange technique surprised everyone, as they had never seen an advanced skill that made perfect copies of the user.
Naruto and his clones then clashed with the cabbage army, and everyone was further surprised when they saw how quickly the shinobi hacked away at the allegedly powerful vegetables.
'I forgot that guy claimed to be a ninja… No, wait! Now's not the time for this! That pervert looks like she's about to burst!'
Kazuma frantically thought as he watched the ninjas dash around chasing cabbages, each complete with a lacy bra sticking out of their pocket like the original. He could also see Darkness trembling, her breaths ragged. She was clearly enjoying having ten copies of her bra being showcased to everyone.
"Ah! That's cheating! Shadow Clones are cheating! I can't use them, so you shouldn't be able to use them!"
Aqua whined as she chased after a cabbage, but it flew through her legs while the girl wasn't looking and caused her to trip.
Naruto laughed at the sight of Aqua falling flat on her butt. The cabbages weren't too much trouble to incapacitate, just a quick slash at their wings with his knife and they helplessly fell to the ground. Even now he held five in his arms just by himself.
'Fifty-thousand Eris just right here… Imagine all the ramen I'm gonna make with this! Ah, I suppose I should leave some for the other adventurers. They look like they're having a rough time catching these things.'
As the ninja was busy with his thoughts, Darkness could be seen running to the vanguard.
Naruto saw this and immediately caught where she was going.
There were a couple adventurers who had been inspired by Naruto's actions and ventured too far in the enemy lines. They were being bombarded by cabbages and couldn't hold them back.
Just as the adventurers were knocked onto the floor and cried in fear of a final blow, Darkness stood firmly in front of them.
"Go! I'll distract the enemy so you may escape!"
Darkness shouted as she took the full brunt of the attacks, grunting with each impact.
"B-but, we can't just leave you here-"
One of the adventurers said, but Darkness cut them off.
"Nonsense! It's a Crusader's job to act as a shield for her comrades! I WANT you to leave me behind and escape!"
"Eeeep!"
"T-thank you!"
Not wanting to argue with the female knight, the two adventurers gratefully fled the scene. But this left Darkness in a pinch.
'I threw my sword down to get here faster, not that it would have done anything… Ah~ W-what is this feeling? Not only am I in a helpless situation where I can't move from being attacked by these cabbages, but my underwear is also in display ten-fold for everyone to see!'
Darkness thought with a massive blush on her face. But behind her, all the adventurers saw was a noble sacrifice.
"Look at that girl, she's sacrificing herself so those guys can escape!"
"What an ideal role model to all Crusaders!"
"Wait, wasn't she the one who had her underwear stolen by Naruto?"
"No way! She's forced to defend herself from the enemy, and the sexual harassment from that delinquent?"
People began to say amongst themselves, but Kazuma wasn't fooled as he could see right through his party member's act.
'You're wrong! Well, they're right about Naruto stealing her underwear… But she's enjoying every second of this!'
Kazuma thought as his mind raced to think of a way to put an end to this madness. He was hopeless in a fight and Darkness looked like she could wait, so he turned his attention towards Naruto. Looking around the battlefield between cabbages and adventurers, he spotted one Naruto dropping some cabbages into a basket.
Aiming his hand toward the stationary blonde, Kazuma activated his newest skill and clenched his hand.
"Steal!"
Kazuma shouted and suddenly felt a familiar sensation in his right hand.
"Alright, I got-!"
Poof!
"…Eh?"
The bra that Kazuma had stolen from the blonde exploded into smoke, and the teen stared at his empty hand in surprise.
'…That wasn't the original Naruto, so the bra disappears if separated from the clone. I'll have to find the original if I want to steal the real bra!'
Kazuma deducted and quickly scanned the area again for any sign of the real Naruto. With his current mana reserves, he would only be able to fire off a few more Steals, so he had to get it on this next one.
'That has to be him!'
Kazuma thought when he saw a Naruto standing in the middle of the battlefield. He seemed to be watching Darkness with a look of concern and confusion.
'That guy must not know about the true nature of Darkness. I'll have a good long talk with him later, but first-Steal!'
Kazuma reached his hand out again, and this time, the bra didn't disappear.
"Yes! I got the right one!"
Kazuma shouted and waved the bra in the air in celebration.
"Ew… That guy just stole the Crusader's underwear from the delinquent…'
"He's even jumping around in joy…"
"What scum…"
"W-wait! You got it all wrong! I was just…"
Kazuma tried to come up with an excuse upon hearing the scornful comments turning towards him, but he was interrupted by a certain Crimson Magic Clansman.
The sight of her friends hogging the spotlight sparked a fire in Megumin. Deciding it was her time to steal the show, she took off her eye patch and made her grand entrance.
"I am Megumin, genius prodigy of the Crimson Magic Clan! My calling is that of an Arch Wizard who wields Explosion magic, the strongest of all offensive magic!"
Megumin announced while flipping her cape for added effect.
'Oh no… not this one too!'
Kazuma thought with a look of dread. If the previous day's events said anything, it would be that this girl would even use Explosion magic on a couple of cabbages.
Mana began to swirl around Megumin's form as magic circles appeared at the tip of her staff.
This caught Naruto's attention, and the ninja looked over to Megumin with wide eyes.
'She's going to use that spell here, with all these people around? Is she insane!?'
As if to answer Naruto's question, Megumin finished her incantation and shouted.
"Explosion!"
BOOM!
Later at the Adventurer's Guild…
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but these cabbages taste great!"
Naruto said as he ate his stir-fried vegetables. All the adventurers who had participated in the emergency quest had received a free plate.
"Why does a simple stir-fry taste so good…"
Kazuma mumbled with a tired expression as he poked at the vegetables on his plate with a fork. He hadn't expected much from the flavor, yet these simple cooked veggies were one of the best tasting things he'd eaten since coming to this world.
Normally one would be happy about such a thing, but Kazuma was still trying to figure out why he was sent to a world where cabbages could fly. In fact, it turned out most vegetables, and even some fruits, were sentient.
What a joke.
"Due to its high magical prowess, cabbages are packed with experience points."
Megumin explained as she wolfed down her own free meal.
"Just one plate of stir-fried cabbages can level up a low leveled adventurer. That's why they are worth so much."
Darkness further explained. She was trying her best to polish her worn armor, but it seemed she would have to get it repaired. So right now, she was now wearing a black top and black skirt with matching leggings. Kazuma noted that she looked kind of like a secretary.
Naruto and Kazuma inspected their adventurer cards.
"Oh, I didn't level up… Maybe I should order another plate?"
Naruto said with a slight frown. Not that it really bothered him, as he had a lot of spare skill points anyway. It was hard to find skills that he couldn't already do with chakra.
"I leveled up twice from all this. What level are you, Naruto?"
Kazuma asked with a raised eyebrow, and the two girls looked up to hear Naruto's answer. It seemed they were curious as well.
"I'm level twenty-four."
"Pffft!?" x3
Naruto pulled his plate off the table just in time as all three of them spewed out the contents of their mouths. His neroid juice, on the other hand, was not so lucky.
"What are you-Ah! Kazuma, what you doing!? Stop! I'm gonna drop my plate!"
Naruto began to say when Kazuma suddenly grabbed his jacket and started shaking him violently.
"It's not fair! I worked my ass off in construction from morning to night, and spent sleepless hours in the stables because I'm so broke that I can't afford to stay at an inn, and risked my life to kill a couple of toads only to make a little more than manual labor! All of that and I'm only level seven! You cheater! Let me have that power of yours for a week, I'll trade you the useless thing I brought with me!"
While Kazuma was ranting, Megumin and Darkness looked at Naruto in awe. They heard Naruto had only been an adventurer for a short amount of time, but to reach level twenty-four in such a short amount of time was unheard of.
"How did you become so strong Naruto?"
Megumin found herself asking. She assumed his leveling came from all the solo hunting Naruto was known for, but she was curious as to the kind of training he must have been doing to get to that level of strength.
After subduing Kazuma and putting him in a headlock with his free arm, Naruto put his plate down on a clean part of the table. He'd have to apologize to the staff for the mess later.
"You want to know how I got this strong? Guts and hard work!"
Naruto responded with a grin, and Megumin pounced on the ninja from across the table.
"Are you making fun of me!?"
"Gah! N-no! I'm not making fun of you! What is with you guys right now!?"
As Naruto and Megumin fought, Darkness turned to Aqua who had been strangely quiet.
"Hey Aqua, should we stop them?"
"Shh! I'm praying to myself that I caught more cabbages than Naruto! After I win, and I know I will, because how could the great me lose to a stalker wannabe ninja? Anyways, after I win I'm going to make Naruto join the Axis Cult and have him pray to me three times a day!"
Aqua said while laughing darkly.
"Praying to yourself…?"
Darkness muttered while staring at her teammate in confusion.
"Why do I get the sudden feeling I need to attack Aqua right now… Besides that, Megumin! Because of your spell, my clones disappeared, and I lost almost all of my cabbages!"
Naruto shouted angrily at the girl who was currently sitting on his back and pinning him to the floor.
What? It's not like he would go all out against a little girl.
Megumin adverted her gaze, causing the ninja to growl out in anger.
After Megumin had unleashed her Explosion, Naruto's clones had dispersed from the blast and the cabbages they had been holding were whisked away. He would have caught more, but the rest of the cabbages had been scared off by the spell.
Luckily, Naruto had already turned in a decent amount of cabbages before the explosion. So it wasn't like he was left empty handed.
'But this girl is acting like nothing happened and it's pissing me off!'
Naruto thought with a tick-mark growing on his forehead. It seemed there was another member of Kazuma's party who was in dire need of pranking.
"You know, I was thinking… Maybe I should just leave defeating the Demon King to Naruto. He's much better suited to do it than I am."
Kazuma absentmindedly said as he stared at the ceiling as he lay on the floor.
"What!? You wanted to defeat the Demon King!? D-don't give up so easily! Otherwise I might never get the chance to sacrifice myself to let everyone escape and become the Demon King's slave!"
Darkness stuttered with a flushed face, along with a very dangerous look in her eyes.
'This girl is beautiful, but she's completely hopeless...'
Kazuma thought as he looked up at the blushing Darkness with a pitiful expression.
"Why is Kazuma staring at me with such pitiful eyes? Is this a new play? I-I don't think I understand, but it's sort of making me feel embarrassed…"
Darkness said while averting her gaze and squirming uncomfortably.
"You know, you are really weird Darkness."
Naruto commented with his chin rested on his hand. It seemed Megumin wasn't going to get off of him anytime soon, and he wasn't about to throw the girl across the room to stand up.
"You can think of a better insult than that Naruto, I can take it."
Darkness said firmly, much to the shinobi's surprise.
"It wasn't an insult! Besides, I like weird people like you! So you should take it as a compliment!"
Naruto blurted out in frustration.
"Eh!? Y-you like me!? To say such a thing so easily in front of everyone… Kazuma's verbal lashings are good, but this sort of play isn't so bad either…!"
Darkness mumbled mostly to herself, her face turning bright red.
"Be careful Darkness, I think you might be on that stalker's hit list now! Your bra was just the start! He might follow you to your house and wait for you to get into the shower before going through your laundry with a lecherous grin on his face!"
Aqua warned her party member. She then pulled her eye lid down and blew a raspberry when Naruto glared at her.
"Do you think he really would?"
Darkness asked with a massive blush, a hidden look of expectation flashing in her eyes.
"Heh~? That's 'Naruto the creep' for you."
Megumin said while looking down at Naruto with a flat look.
"Are people calling me that!? Also, Aqua! Stop calling me a stalker! You're giving people the wrong idea about me! Help me out here Kazuma!"
Naruto yelled and looked to his only male friend in this world for help.
Kazuma sighed.
'Looks like this is going to be a reoccurring thing from now on…'
A/N: Explosion!
Hope you guys enjoyed the cabbage hunt!
Shout out to my new beta Aicidash for making this chapter sparkly clean! XD
See ya next time!