A/N: Revised as of 2/22/2024.

"-and so I punished the evil Eris Cult by kicking rocks into their church's windows! Ah… That was a good day… At least until I was unjustly arrested for some reason."

"Of course you were arrested! Why would you do that!? All they did was tell the truth about you crazy Axis Cultists!"

Naruto and Cecily were sitting at the table in his kitchen. She had made a batch of what she called "Tokoroten Slime", which was a blue jelly-like candy. But if Naruto remembered correctly, the stuff was illegal in this country so he wanted nothing to do with it.

If the police asked, an Axis Cultist broke into his apartment and made a batch without his permission.

"Oh, they were obviously telling lies. We Axis Cultists never do anything wrong. If our desire to recruit is not acceptable, then it's clearly society that's at fault. If anything, I was applying divine justice bless by Lady Aqua herself!"

Cecily said while waving her hand dismissively.

'That makes absolutely no sense… But why do I see Aqua saying the same exact thing?'

Naruto thought incredulously. But enough of this nonsense, it was time to get serious. He wanted nothing to do with this troublesome priestess. The sooner he found out what she truly wanted, the sooner he could figure out a way to get rid of her.

"Why did you really come here? I highly doubt you really want to marry me. I mean, we only just met."

"Oh, you… Don't you believe in love at first sight?"

Cecily asked while fluttering her eyelashes, but Naruto wasn't having any of it and simply crossed his arms.

"Sheesh, what a serious man. You won't get a girlfriend with that kind of attitude."

"Th-that's none of your business! Now tell me what you want!"

Naruto fumed at the mentioning of a recently developing touchy subject.

Cecily snickered at his reaction, which caused the male's face to turn even redder in frustration.

"Alright, you got me. It seems I have to reveal my true mission. The truth is…"

. . .

Naruto's eyes were bulging out of their sockets when Cecily finished telling her story.

"You owe that restaurant four-million Eris!?"

"Yes, it is quite unfortunate. They agreed to let me use the restaurant when I told them I would be using it to recruit a handsome, and rich, young man into the Axis Cult."

Cecily explained, and Naruto slammed his hands on the table.

"So you admit it was all just a scam!"

"Obviously I couldn't pay the fee, as I was hoping my husband-to-be would pay for his beautiful wife's debts..."

Cecily trailed off with a wink, but Naruto adverted his gaze.

"But when I failed to convert you to the Axis Cult, that left the owner in quite a foul mood. He said something about messing with his profits for no results. So I escaped Alcanretia, my home, to the town of beginners with an unreasonable debt. The Axis Cult church here is quite underhanded, you see. I figured if I were to bring a raise to our number of worshipers in this town, then I could be pardoned of my debts!"

"I don't think it'll work out that way. Actually, aren't you just running away from your problems? You should stop wasting your time and start working."

Naruto retorted when the girl proudly explained her plans, but Cecily remained unfazed. In fact, her smile only grew.

"That's what I plan on doing, as that falls onto my second plan! As my future husband-"

"Not gonna happen."

"-I did some extensive research on you! One of my sources, that preferred to remain anonymous, claimed that you are in search of party members! Specifically, a beautiful priestess."

Cecily said and leaned over the table to get closer.

"You need members for your party, and I need money to pay for my unreasonable debts. Sounds like a fair deal, right?"

The priestess offered, her expression turning coy.

Naruto grimaced as he leaned back to keep their faces from touching. This woman truly didn't know the meaning of personal space.

Dust… That man really told her everything he knew.

'To think that guy is drinking off my tab right now… But as much as I hate to admit it, she has a point…'

'Hey, Naruto… Don't tell me you're actually thinking about allowing this psychotic priestess into your team? This woman gives off a similar vibe to that bratty goddess.'

'I know Kurama… But I've been starting to think that the only people who would want to go on the kind of quests we want to do are crazy people… Unless you want to wait another couple months to get into some real action?'

'…That's true. I just hope you know what you're getting yourself into.'

With the conclusion to the short conversation with his inner demon, Naruto made up his mind.

"…Fine. You can join my party."

Naruto finally said, and Cecily jumped over the table and tackled him into a bone crushing hug. They both fell onto the floor with a thud.

"Thank you very much! As the beautiful priestess of the Axis Cult, I won't let you down!"

"Ouch! Hey, get off me! I wasn't finished!"

Naruto barked with a flushed face when the girl started rubbing her cheek on his whisker marks.

After successfully prying his fellow blonde away from his face, Naruto kept his hands firmly on her shoulders.

"Listen, I said you can join my party, but you can't try and force our other two members to join the Axis Cult. Also, don't walk around calling me your fiancé. It'll cause misunderstandings…"

"Hehe… You're is so cute when he acts shy… As expected of my future caretaker."

Cecily cooed and poked the shinobi on the cheek, only to have her hand lightly swatted away.

"You didn't even bother saying husband that time!"

Getting to his feet and picking up the fallen chair, Naruto let out a long sigh. This woman was supposed to be a priestess, right? Then why did he feel like he just made a pact with a devil?

He was already beginning to regret his decision.

But on the brighter side of things, he had a full party! Now all he had to do was introduce them all to each other.

'I wonder what the others are going to think of this gold-digging priestess? Dust will be fine as long as Cecily doesn't try and convert him to the Axis Cult, and Yunyun will probably…'

Naruto stopped mid-thought and blinked.

…Yunyun?

Cecily walked over to Naruto's bed and plopped a piece of Tokoroten Slime into her mouth before taking a seat.

"So, darling~? Would it be alright if I stayed here for a couple days? At least until I pay off my debts-"

"OH NO! I forgot about Yunyun again!"

Adventurer's Guild…

"Hey little miss, would you like me to join you? Playing a game by yourself is lonely, isn't it?"

Yunyun looked up from her board game to see a kind looking man smiling at her.

"N-no… I'm actually waiting for f-friend."

Yunyun said, but even after giving her reason for playing alone, the man took the empty seat on the other side of the table.

"Is that so? I've seen you sitting here for a couple hours, so… If you want, I can play with you till they show up?"

"Of course they're coming! Naruto-san promised he'd introduce me to our other party members, so-"

"Geh…! Did you say Naruto? S-s-sorry to bother you then!"

"Ah…"

Yunyun watched as the Oni-San took off in hurry. That was the third person that offered to play with her, but they would run away as soon as she mentioned she was waiting for someone.

'Could it be… The adventurers are afraid of Naruto-san?'

As Yunyun was lost in her thoughts, three people entered the adventurer's guild.

"That girl… She's the reason we have no money, and when I finally say it's time to work she disappears! When I get my hands on her…"

"Well maybe if Kazuma didn't sleep on Darkness's lap for so long with a lecherous face, you could have stopped Aqua from leaving."

Yunyun's eyes widened when she heard the second voice.

'This voice is…!'

The shy mage turned to see who the owner of the voice was, but a guy with pale blonde hair and red eyes walked in front of her view. She was quick to realize that it was the same ruffian that had caused a scene earlier regarding someone else's tab.

"Hey there, girly… Whatcha doin here all by yourself?"

The clearly drunken male asked, and Yunyun had to plug her because of how strongly he reeked of alcohol.

'It's that despicable man from earlier… I-I feel sorry for using Naruto-san's name like this, but I don't want to deal with this man right now.'

Yunyun thought before putting her board pieces back into their container.

"I'm waiting for Naruto-san to return so he can introduce me to our other party member."

There, now that person would run away just like all the others-

"Eh!? No way! Naruto should have told me he found another member, and a cute one at that!"

…Huh?

Yunyun blinked when the man took the empty seat that the previous people ran away from.

"The name's Dust. I'm a very famous adventurer around these parts, so you won't have to worry about a thing with me around! Isn't that great?"

Dust introduced himself with a smug grin.

Lies. This man was obviously just some delinquent using Naruto's name to get close to her. As inexperienced as Yunyun was when it came to interacting with other people, even she knew trouble when they sat right in front of her.

"I'm afraid you must be mistaken. Naruto-san isn't the type to invite drunkards into his party. He's aiming to defeat the Demon King after all."

"Hey now, don't be like that. I'm fully aware of the Boss's ambitions, even more so than others since I'm his righthand man. I'm in charge of gathering intel such as the latest rumors and gossip about the Boss."

…Boss?

Yunyun wanted to ask why this man was calling Naruto "Boss", but she was even more curious about the supposed rumors floating around her first party member's name. Maybe she could find out why the previous adventurers that showed up ran away from just hearing Naruto's name.

"What kind of rumors?"

Dust smirked. He felt bad about stealing one of Naruto's catches, but this girl was just his type. Slightly childish looking while giving off a mature vibe, and a voluptuous figure to balance it out. Now he just had to make Naruto sound bad by telling her all the rumors, and she'd be putty in his hands.

"There's a lot stuff going around about the Boss. A lot of the rumors are false, but most of them are true."

"I-is that so…?"

Yunyun asked with a bitter smile. She wished he'd just get to the point already. Also, did he just move a seat closer to her?

"You might be surprised by this, but the Boss is actually involved with multiple woman."

Dust said in a low voice while making sure other people weren't listening in on their conversation.

"E-eh!? Naruto-san is!?"

Yunyun balked with wide eyes.

"Shh…! Keep your voice down! This is delicate information that the Boss doesn't want other people to hear! He gets really mad if you mention his ladies!"

Dust hissed with a finger over his lips, and Yunyun quickly covered her mouth.

"But yeah, it's true. Boss is always flirting with the guild's busty receptionist Luna-san, and he's been seen walking to and from a certain magic item shop whose owner is a beautiful Onee-san every day. Sometimes multiple times a day."

"N-Naruto-san did seem to be quite familiar with that receptionist earlier, and I remember him mentioning something about a magic shop…"

Yunyun muttered to herself, but she shook her head. All of this seemed fishy to her, and it was always best not to jump to conclusions without concrete evidence.

"Boss is also pretty chummy with two of the female members in the party of a drinking buddy of mine, and I think Boss has recently set his eyes on the third female member… Even though it's a bad idea."

Dust said while rubbing his chin in thought. Darkness may have one of the best figures he had ever seen, but that personality just didn't fit. He wasn't about to let Naruto fall onto that landmine… Unless he was into that sort of thing?

It seemed Dust had quite the conversation to have with Naruto later.

"…"

Yunyun fell silent. If Dust was telling the truth, then was the only reason Naruto asked her to join his party was because he was targeting her?

But it still didn't add up. In the days that they had traveled together, not once did Naruto make any obvious advances towards her. The older boy had been very respectful and always looked her in the eyes. Perhaps she was too young for his tastes?

For some reason, that thought made Yunyun feel a little lonely.

Dust grinned when he saw the somber look growing on the younger girl's face. She was right where he wanted her… Now all he had to do was give the final push.

But just before Dust could say a single word, the guild doors burst open.

"Yunyun! Are you still here!?"

"Naruto-san?"

Hearing the shinobi's voice, Yunyun instantly perked up. But she her jaw hung loose when she turned to see Naruto carrying a blonde woman dressed in a nun's attire bridal-style.

"…Eh?"

Was all Yunyun could say as her mind raced to think of a reason as to why Naruto was carrying a woman in such a fashion.

The entire guild had been silenced, but Dust was the first person to speak their collective thoughts.

"Um… Boss? Why are you carrying the crazy priestess? Wait, don't tell me…"

"That's right! I'm Naruto's bride-to-be!"

Cecily instantly declared and squeezed her arms that were currently wrapped around the ninja's neck, which caused an uproar of murmurs to spread throughout the guild like wildfire.

"Wrong! I told you not to say stuff like that you idiot!"

Naruto barked and tried to put her down, but she wrapped her legs around his waist and refused to let go.

"After you so boldly carried me here bridal style? Just how unreasonable can you be?"

As the two struggled against one another, the murmuring inside the guild grew even more intense.

"Hey, did you hear that?"

"Naruto's getting married to that pretty girl? Damn I'm jealous!"

"Wait, I recognize that nun… She's an Axis Cultist."

"Ah, never mind then."

Some of the guildmembers whispered amongst themselves, prompting the shinobi to sigh in relief. Thank god, there wouldn't be any misunderstandings.

"Now that you mention it, he does seem a little unwilling. She's probably trying to get him to join the Axis Cult by forcing him into marriage."

"Those cultists will do anything to get more members."

"Poor bastard."

The guild members continued, and Naruto smiled wryly at quickly the opinions on the situation shifted. It seemed he didn't have anything to worry about since Cecily was an Axis Cultist, and anything she said would automatically be rendered as nonsense in the public eye.

He almost felt sorry for the Axis Cultists… Almost.

"W-wait… Cecily-san!?"

Yunyun sputtered when she recognized the woman in Naruto's arms.

That was unmistakably Cecily, and did she just mention marriage!? But marriage usually meant retirement for adventurers! Was her party disbanding after she only just joined!?

"Oh? Is that Yunyun? Then that must mean…"

Cecily scanned the room until she found the other Crimson Magic Clansman, who was also staring at her in surprise.

"Ah! Megumiiiiin!"

Jumping out of Naruto's arms, Cecily ran over to Megumin and pulled the little girl's face into her chest.

"It's been so long, Megumin! You're just as cute as I remember you!"

"H-huh!? What are you doing here, Cecily? Yunyun too!?"

Megumin, clearly overwhelmed by the sudden manhandling treatment, struggled against the older woman's grip.

"Please call me Cecily-Nee!"

After a couple minutes, Cecily finally calmed down and released Megumin. There was a lot of questions that need to be asked/answered, so Naruto and Kazuma brought their parties together and went to one of the larger tables in the back of the guild so they could have a chat.

Naruto, Dust, Yunyun, and Cecily sat on one side of the table, while Kazuma, Darkness, and Megumin sat on the other side. The only person missing was Aqua, whose whereabouts were still unknown.

"To think Yunyun and Cecily were Naruto's newest members… Fate sure is a funny thing."

Megumin commented while eyeing the two girls on the other side of the table. She and Yunyun were rivals who traveled to Alcanretia after graduating from their school at the Home of the Crimson Magic, and they met Cecily when they passed through the city of hot springs to get to Axel.

Yunyun adverted her gaze nervously. Partially because Megumin was there, but also because of what she had just learned from Dust. Dust's drinking buddy turned out to be Kazuma, so the girl's that Naruto was "chummy" with must be Megumin and Darkness. But was that really true?

Kazuma looked at Yunyun and Cecily, then back at Naruto.

'Gah! They're both cute! I'm so jealous! Ah, but wait! So are the girls in my party… Looks like I have to test them first.'

With that thought, Kazuma turned towards the mage.

"Yunyun, was it? Why did you join Naruto's party?"

"U-um… I met Naruto-san at the Home of the Crimson Magic, and he said he was looking for a mage to join his party…"

Yunyun stuttered nervously, and she could feel Megumin's suspicious gaze on her from across the table.

'Ah, the shy mage archetype… How nice… Too bad she's the same age as Megumin, they're both just a year under my strike-zone.'

Kazuma thought with a short nod before turning to the second girl on the other side of the table.

"I see I see… Cecily-san, was it? You're a Priest from the Axis Cult, right? Why did you join Naruto's party?"

"Money!"

Cecily instantly replied with dollar signs in her eyes, and Kazuma gained a deadpanned expression.

Nope, that girl was a lost cause. He could already tell that she was just like Aqua. He wondered if all the Axis Cultists were like that…

"Why is Kazuma acting like an interrogator? I can't help but feel you have an ulterior motive. Also, Yunyun. You didn't get sweet talked by this man, did you? Naruto may seem like a nice guy on the outside, but underneath he's a man who lies to cute girls and doesn't keep his promises!"

Megumin said, causing Yunyun to squirm in her chair.

'Who's acting like an interrogator?'

Kazuma thought with a twitching eyebrow, but kept it to himself to avoid angering the short-fused mage of his party. Her anger seemed to be pointed at Naruto anyway.

"Wait a second! I always keep my promises, and I've never lied to any of you!"

Naruto shouted in his defense. Because keeping his promises was nindo, damn it!

Hoping that he would say that, Megumin's eyes flashed.

"Oh? Then why haven't we had our competition yet? Did you not promise to face me in a battle of Explosions if I defeated a high bounty target first?"

"W-well…"

Naruto adverted his gaze. It was true that he agreed to that bet, and he wasn't actually that tired when he returned from his trip…

"You also kept poor Yunyun waiting for such a long time, Boss. How long did you wait, Yunyun-chan?"

Dust added, and an imaginary arrow struck Naruto in the back.

"J-just a few hours… B-but I wasn't lonely or anything! I kept myself busy with some games!"

Yunyun stuttered, and a second imaginary arrow lodged itself into Naruto's back.

"Ah, and some nice people also came over to say hello! Although they ran away when they learned I was waiting for Naruto-san…"

Yunyun quickly added when she saw the pained look on Naruto's face, but it only served to worsen the shinobi's guilt and he fell to the floor from the weight it brought.

"I-I'm sorry for making you wait so long, Yunyun…"

Naruto muttered as he picked himself off the ground and back into his seat. In the name of his nindo, he would make it up to the girl!

"N-no, it's okay! I'm used to playing games by myself! But Megumin! I can't ignore those awful things you said about Naruto-san!"

Yunyun said, launching another guilt arrow into Naruto's back that successfully knocked him onto the ground.

"Oh? What, do you want to fight? I always knew Yunyun would fall prey to someone who said nice things to her! To think it would be my second self-proclaimed rival you fell prey to."

Megumin declared and stood up, her eyes shining a brilliant crimson.

Yunyun responded by standing up as well, and lightning seemed to crackle as the two stared at each other.

"…Hang on. Megumin just said something I can't ignore."

Naruto said, recovering from his previous guilt trips.

"What do you mean by 'self-proclaimed rivals'?"

"Yunyun is always challenging me, despite knowing that I'm the top Crimson Magic Clansman. But she hasn't defeated me a single time. Naruto even declared that we were rivals to defeat the Demon King, yet he won't even keep his promise to face me in battle despite being the one to issue that challenge. Sheesh… What am I to do with all these hopeless, self-proclaimed rivals of mine?"

Megumin explained while shaking her head and shrugging.

A vein bulged on Naruto and Yunyun's foreheads.

"N-now now! Let's not start a fight inside the guild!"

Darkness said and stood up when she saw the obvious anger in both of their eyes.

Naruto and Yunyun sent each other a knowing look. Megumin was going down.

Kazuma sighed as the two parties seemed to calm down and started conversing normally. He hadn't even gone on a quest yet today and he already wanted to go home and sleep.

First, he went to Wiz's store to find out that Naruto had returned and ruined his hard work in fixing the shopkeeper, then he failed to show off his achievements thanks to a certain mage. There was also that whole fiasco with finding Dust earlier.

In the end, they were back at the adventurer's guild and meeting Naruto's newly formed party.

But the day still wasn't over. He had to find Aqua so they could finally start on working off the debt their party had collected because of her. As much as he wanted to just leave the debt on her, it would affect his already crippled reputation too much if he just abandoned his party member.

'Where is that goddess of poverty anyway?'

Kazuma thought, and as if to answer his question, the guild doors loudly swung open for a third time that day.

"Naruto! Is Naruto here!? Come out and face me!"

Aqua's loud and screechy voice echoed throughout the guild hall.

'We're not going on a quest anytime soon, are we? Ah… I wanna go back home to Japan…'

Kazuma thought and laid his head on the table.

A/N: And so, Naruto's party is officially formed! Let me know what you guys think of this Wonderful group of weirdos!